Personal Narratives
• What sentence did he remove because it wasn’t necessary in his narrative?
Use your partner’s suggestions and your own ideas to revise your narrative. When you have finished, go over the Content Editor’s Checklist again. Be sure you can answer yes to all the questions.
• How did Will change the last paragraph? Why do you think he made the change?
Copyediting
• Kaitlin at first wondered why Will put different kinds of food in the bird feeders. What did Will add in the second paragraph?
Your Turn
Revising
• Kaitlin wrote that the introduction didn’t grab her attention. How did Will fix this? Did the new introduction grab your attention?
Content Editing
• Will didn’t think that telling the kind of tree was important. Instead, what did he decide to add about his feeder?
Drafting
• He took Kaitlin’s suggestion about his introduction. What did he add?
Will looked over his draft again. He decided to add the phrase from other animals to explain why the birds would want to hide. The last thing Will did was to improve his title. He thought the two b sounds gave it real punch.
Prewriting
Look at what Will did to improve his personal narrative.
Proofreading Publishing
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