Remembering Baladitya by Lokabandhu Lokabee

Triratna Buddhist Order 1984-2012

Remembering Baladitya:

Memories & Rejoicings by his friends 1

Contents Introduction _______________________________________________________________ 5 Death ____________________________________________________________________ 5 Immediate responses________________________________________________________ 6 Kevala __________________________________________________________________________ 7 Alobhin _________________________________________________________________________ 8 Achintya_________________________________________________________________________ 8 Achaladeva ______________________________________________________________________ 9 Prajnagupta _____________________________________________________________________ 10 Shantavira ______________________________________________________________________ 10 Silajala _________________________________________________________________________ 11 Manjuvajra _____________________________________________________________________ 11 Manjurava ______________________________________________________________________ 13 Jnanarakshita ___________________________________________________________________ 14 Paramajyoti _____________________________________________________________________ 16 Mahabodhi _____________________________________________________________________ 17 Shantinayaka ____________________________________________________________________ 18 Thiradhamma ___________________________________________________________________ 19 Vessantara ______________________________________________________________________ 19 Khemajoti ______________________________________________________________________ 20 Vajradevi _______________________________________________________________________ 21

Older memories ___________________________________________________________ 23 Susiddhi ________________________________________________________________________ 23 Aryadaka _______________________________________________________________________ 24 Aryacitta _______________________________________________________________________ 24 Dharmabandhu __________________________________________________________________ 25 Manjupriya _____________________________________________________________________ 27 Dayaratna ______________________________________________________________________ 27

Baladitya in his own words __________________________________________________ 28

Introduction This book is dedicated to the memory of Baladitya, who was ordained into the Western Buddhist Order in 1984 and died unexpectedly in Thailand in 2012. He was one of the first Order Members I met and worked alongside, and I think pulling together this book is my own contribution and â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;rejoicingâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; in him. As Rumi says, "Let the beauty you love be what you do/ There are a thousand ways to kneel and kiss the earth."Lokabandhu, Glastonbury, March 2014

Death Baladitya died in Thailand on 8 March 2012 of a heart attack. His wife, Orasa, arranged his funeral celebrations in Thailand according to local customs and his body was cremated in a local wat. Baladitya was ordained by Bhante in October 1984 at Il Convento, Italy. The practice given to him at ordination was Amitabha. He was 63 years old. Kevala writes: Baladitya died early Friday morning in northern Thailand where he lived for five months of the year, 2 hours inland from Chang Mai. I got a call from Douglas Hastings (ex Ajitasena) who lives near him there. We think it was a heart attack. Baladitya had a heart condition, high cholesterol, and was on tablets to keep his blood pressure down. About 10 days ago he emailed me to say he had started running and then fainted in his kitchen when he was cleaning his toaster. I think he didn't recover from that and even continued running. Going out for a run is not a good idea if you haven't been exercising. He'd have been better off building up by walking, if any of you are contemplating a similar thing. Baladitya has a wife and inherited extended family there and the whole Buddhist cultural thing kicked in immediately. He was surrounded by Buddhist monks chanting until his cremation on Saturday morning... Two of his close friends, Dharmabandhu and Sumana, where at Vultures peak at the time of his cremation and did some chanting and recollection of him. Something that I think would have appealed to him. Unless anyone else wants to organise something I thought we could wait until Dharmabandhu and Sumana return in April then have some kind of celebration for him either in Brighton or London. Danavira is happy to lead the memorial part. if you have any ideas or want to come, i don't mind coordinating some of it and if anyone wants to help I would appreciate it. Please let me know. dragon55fly@yahoo.co.uk Douglas Hastings: Baladitya died this morning of a heart attack at 11.00 am Thai time.His wife, Orasa is arranging the funeral celebrations according to Thai customs and his body will be cremated in a local wat. 5

Member of the Triratna Buddhist Order 1981 - 2012

Immediate responses Kevala i think he ( baladitya ) was happy. i know many people liked baladitya and some may now may be realising that they liked him more than they thought, because to some he was strong medicine. bala ( long last a ) means power and when he was wrong he was powerfully wrong, but when he was right he could blow you away. he was informed and informative about many things from defence spending to mythology, ( joseph campbell ). he had a passion for the dynamics of christianity and the pagan world, especially the

history of the colonization of america and the tragedy of the native americans. ( dances with wolves, last of the mohichans ) he was part canadian and spent a lot of time there. he set up the original fwbo vancouver. his father was a rear gunner in lancasters and part of 617 dambusters squadron but didn't go on the mission after he had a punch up with guy gibson. he used to fish, before he was a buddhist, and had the rare ability to take himself off to the beach or up on the local southdowns and just sit there all day happily doing nothing, communing with nature. he was playful, eccentric, perceptive, lovable, annoying, compassionate and had huge faith in amithaba and bhante. i live (d ) with baladiya and enjoyed daily chats. our last conversation by email, typically, revolved around football. specifically the questionable parentage of the referee at the recent manchester untited v real madrid game. a final and devastating lesson in impermanence from baladitya, my first feelings were entirely selfish, i have been deprived of a close friend. makes you think that the neglected phone call or email to a close friend may be the last one you never had.

Alobhin Baladitya was the most lovable rogue I ever knew. I lived with him in Bristol for nearly three years. He said people could find him difficult because he reflected back their shadow. I don't know if this is true but when I moved him with him I thort he would be hard to live with. He wasnt. He was always considerate kind and generous. He grew strwberries in the garden which he enjoyed presenting to us with cream on. he also had a cracking sense of humour and a feel for the absurd. I loved my time at Ravenswood community with BD. May he have an auspicious rebirth.

Achintya Remembering Baladitya - who died today. Two memories - walking home from Evolution after work, we were going to celebrate someone's birthday at the Centre, and he had forgotten to bring the cake from the shop. He suddenly came to a stop and said 'oh, I've forgotten the cake'. It wasn't what he said but how he said it; with such compassion and care for the person whose birthday it was. We

hurried back and opened up and got the cake ok, much enjoyed later. And the second memory was his room at Ravenswood Rd where we both had rooms. I don't think he could have got any more plants in there! It was hard to get in the door! Perhaps he was already trying to move to Thailand; it was like a jungle. And he had built this astonishing platform bed, like a mezzanine, out of all kinds of bits of wood. Not sure if the Landlord had ever found out, or the tenants who followed him. One other tiny memory; of a model ship he painstakingly built out of wood. It was very special to him. He was a one-off, unique Buddhist, caring deeply in his own way and never afraid to challenge smoke and mirrors, he carried a lot of pain in him he seemed to find it hard to tell others about that; he loved board games, getting people together in his room, and watching his beloved football matches. He valued his friends very much. I miss him being on the planet with us. Achintya

Achaladeva I want to say something about Baladitya. We did a puja for him the other evening, and I told some of my memories of him and rejoiced in his merits beforehand. I first met him here at Guhyaloka nearly twenty years ago, when he was living and working here and I was a guest. I immediately found him an interesting and original man, and was glad to find myself in a chapter with him in Bristol after I was ordained in 95. I also worked with him at Evolution Bristol for a few years. Whilst at times I found him a challenging man to work with and manage(I was at that time the manager of the shop), my ongoing sense of him was positive and I feel I gained a lot from my connection with him. I personally found him to be a very robust individual who was always surprising me with his original and often very interesting and humorous communication and anecdotes. I found his presence in this way inspiring and it encouraged me to take a few risks and get out of my box a bit more. I also experienced him as being very non reactive in some quite heated discussions we were involved in. One in particular comes to mind; an order meeting at the Bristol centre where he came in for some strong criticism from myself and others (shamefully I remember expressing quite a bit of anger to him at the time), but he dealt with it without reacting. He acknowledged the heat, but had the space to respond with good humour. I personally found that a humbling experience, but his behaviour was an inspiration to me. So thanks matey, sorry to see you go, and so long. With metta, Achaladeva

Prajnagupta Dear Baladitya, I'm very sorry never to meet you again in this life and hope that where-ever your consciousness is coursing that you carry the good karma of your love of magic, beauty and symbols. I always enjoyed our chats as you were so at home in the lower, middle and upper worlds alike - no barriers. As always, I have the Padmasambhava rupa I bought from you just before you went to Thailand in the centre of my shrine. I'm glad I have it as it is a 3D reminder that Form, Time and Space is not all there is. Fare Well

Shantavira I was shocked to hear of Baladitya's demise. We were ordained together in Tuscany in 1984, and went for many walks together at the time. If we came across a scrap of old newspaper, he would scan it for football results, and he sometimes borrowed my binoculars to watch the village teams in the valley below the Lion Terrace. I didn't see much of him in the intervening years, but when I did, his friendly cheerful spirit was always to the fore.

Silajala Baladitya: I was sitting in the Centre office on my own when the news came in via my email, to which I responded by saying " oh my god" (interesting!) and sat there shocked. After a few minutes the best thing it seemed I could do was sit by the shrine and chant the Vajrasattva mantra with a strong sense of it being clearly for Baladitya, and as I did so something seemed to shift. The initial shock wore off (it returned later) and I was glad to be able to do something for him, as it were. The last time I saw Baladitya was on a convention a few years ago and he seemed very happy, and he was telling me about how he was now married to a Thai woman and what a turn up for the books it was. I agreed, it certainly wasn't something I'd have guessed he would do. But it was nice to see him looking happy. He and I worked together in the Bristol Evolution shop in the late nineties and I even lived with him and Dharmabandhu in late 1995 for a few months too. That was interesting - and was my first introduction to living with Order members! Although Baladitya in many ways could be a handful (he was nick-named Tad Maverick by Achalavira - as though it could be his Hollywood film star name!) I always felt he had a very kind heart. in particular I remember how he took Vimokshadaka under his wing when he was the nineteen year old Patrick Baigent starry eyed and new to the movement. I imagine for Vimokshadaka Baladitya's death has come as quite a shock too and is very painful for him. Baladitya's friendship with Vimokshadaka seemed to being out a certain fatherliness in him, which was touching to witness. So long Baladitya - may you be happy and well wherever 'you' end up next...

Manjuvajra I was shocked to hear that Baladitya had died. He was an old friend. In fact I was one of the first Order members to meet him and, had we kept to our recent plan to meet before he went to Thailand, I would have been one of the last to see him. I have memories of him over a period of almost forty years but mostly of the period in the eighties and nineties at Aryaloka in the USA. In the mid nineteen-seventies Baladitya used to come to breakfast at Golgonooza, a community near the then emerging London Buddhist Centre. He dressed totally in black, had a full black beard, black hair, shifty eyes and a large silver cross. Our talk was mainly about magic and supernatural forces. Baladitya was an eccentric of the type who tries to make you think he is trying to make you think he is eccentric, so as to cover the fact that he truly is eccentric.

He was a little scary but also very likable. He was born and raised in the East End of London. His mother was English but his Canadian father had returned to Canada where Baladitya spent many years of his adult life. Before coming to the LBC he had been a genuine old fashioned apprentice to a goldsmith and often lived by his skills with silver and gold. He was widely travelled and always having adventures, getting involved on the edges of revolution in South America, and being shot at by drug gangsters in Montreal. He had an aversion to authority and anything official a raid by the immigration authorities at Aryaloka once sent him high-tailing it out of the country. His unconventional dress sense also caused comment and sometimes problems on one occasion he was picked up by the police at a Greyhound station because of his suspicious poncho, and summarily deported to Canada. Baladitya was ordained by Bhante in 1984 at the same time as Dharmabandhu and they formed an inseparable and dynamic friendship which held strong until the end. They planned to start activities in Vancouver but en route spent some time helping get Aryaloka off the ground. It was a very difficult period involving a lot of hard work and 'lively interaction' between those of us in the community. Each of us contributed $300 a week to the upkeep of the centre and community and Baladitya earned this by cutting out heart shaped pieces of wood 200 a day, no more no less! I can still see him after lunch reading his newspaper spread out on the large community table. He must also have suffered a particular suffering at that time, because no one else in the community was interested in football and, pre-internet, it was not possible to watch his team play. He was a loyal supporter not

only of his team (being ignorant of these things I cannot say which one) but also of his friends. His impeccable loyalty to Dharmabandhu I have mentioned, and even though we had our rubbing points, he was always a loyal friend to me, he had a woman friend in Vancouver who he kept an eye on during a period of illness; and he was especially loyal to Bhante. Those who enjoy the benefits of the movement in the US and Canada, especially at Aryaloka and in Vancouver, owe a debt of gratitude to Baladitya who laboured hard in the early days, and kept returning to help out when help was needed. Baladitya has contributed in his own inimical way to the development of Buddhafield, and the development of the Bristol Centre, through the financial contributions of the Evolution shop and more directly as a friend to the men. He was a man's man, an undomesticated man, not always, perhaps never, diplomatic or sensitive in his dealings with women; but if you wanted a lively masculine atmosphere, untidy, unconventional, surprising, stimulating and wild he (and likewise Dharmabandhu) was your man. Baladitya manifested in many places helping out, where necessary, to build and establish anything to help develop our movement. An American girlfriend of mine was once visiting the women's community in Approach Road. She was taking a bath when suddenly a hole appeared in the ceiling through which Baladitya poked his head. He had a job to do and couldn't wait all day for her to laze about in the bath. His odd ways, and his intense interest in obscure and arcane subjects at times irritated and at times enthralled, but what always remained was a feeling a great affection for a truly lovable and unique character who will be sorely missed. If there is a future life, his will be a wild adventure.

Manjurava Hi, I have been meaning to write to Shabda for a while, but for now just want to write something about Baladitya. I remember Baladitya from when I was involved in Bristol, in the mid-late 90s. I was working in the Evolution Shop, where I remember him drilling away in the back room putting up shelves. He used to be so thoroughly himself. He would tell fascinating stories about other times and places that seemed a long way off from the Bristol Galleries shopping centre. I remember someone new at the Evolution Shop once questioning whether he really was as an order member should be, an accidental compliment about both Baladitya and the Order that it is about people being so truly themselves rather than fitting into boxes.

I have fond memories of going to play a boardgame Risk in his place in Bristol on Christmas day afternoons. I would tell my Mum I had to be off and would leave my xmas lunch to go down the hill and join a whole bunch of guys playing this Risk game which Baladitya had specially re-designed with extra countries such as Atlantis. Baladitya's room was full of plants everywhere, the music from 'The Great Escape' would be playing and we would be served up home-made lasagne for dinner. Baladitya often won, he would keep quiet until victory was close to his grasp, then there would be a twinkle to his eye and a wry smile as he mopped up. I was always glad in later years whenever I met Baladitya. I remember being struck at his presence and found it delightful to listen to him. I got a sense of how beneath the surface there was a real warmth and kindness, I thought 'this is what it means to practise Amitabha'. I am really sorry that he is gone. Go well Baladitya.

Jnanarakshita This is to rejoice in Baladitya's merits. I lived with Baladitya for a few years at Ravenswood Road in Redland, Bristol between 2003 and 2006. (I took the room that was free when Sumana moved to London. Alobhin was there too, apart from when he went to do the 'Q Project' for a year, and Aryapriya took his place.) It was a particular and memorable time. I always experienced Baladitya as very kind to us mitras (as we were then). There may have been the occasionally infuriating things, but on balance the set up was just what I needed at the time. (A high point was the weekend when some of the guys from Padmaloka stayed with us. I had my kalyana mitra ceremony, and six men had their public ordination at the Buddhist centre. Padmavajra laughed and laughed because there were so many quirky features in the house at Ravenswood Road.) What a likeable rogue and 'rough diamond' Baladitya was. I often experience Order members from the 70s and 80s as having particularly well-developed and well-defined individuality. I am sure that's true for all of us to varying degrees, but maybe they have had a head start on the rest of us and it shines out of them a bit more, I don't know. Anyway, each and all are utterly unique and irreplaceable, and Baladitya is surely no exception in this.

I think some people experienced Baladitya as being a bit like a Native American warrior. I think he liked the analogy. He was part Londoner and part Canadian (and, as his previous surname hinted, there was some Scots or Irish in there too). Baladitya was quite unpredictable in some ways. Often you wouldn't know what he would say next. He was often on the front foot, so to speak. I heard from Manjurava and Vimokshadaka about legendary sessions of the game 'Risk' that Baladitya hosted. He had created his own brilliant 'Risk' board (complete with extra continents, including Atlantis) especially for the purpose. Sometimes we watched TV or films in Baladitya's room. Kevala would come round and they'd talk or watch football together. Blue (Deborah Harris) came round too when it was the European Cup final. At half time, Liverpool were 3-0 down. I gave up and went to my room. Later on they said "What happened to you? Liverpool won!!". I felt a bit embarrassed that I had given up with it so easily. It was a most extraordinary game by all accounts. One time Baladitya came back from Thailand with beautiful silk dressing gowns (with dragon motifs on the back), one for each us: a golden yellow one for Alobhin, a royal blue one for me, and a ruby red one for him - beautiful colours. We were all really pleased with them. I still have mine and I am still pleased with it. When suddenly and unexpectedly confronted by a man who had broken into the house, rather than attempting to ensure the security of his possessions, Baladitya's first instinct was to check whether Alobhin and I were safe and unharmed. When Aryapriya moved in, we found out that Baladitya had helped build the hospital that Aryapriya had been born in - the Royal Free Hospital in Hampstead. (Dharmabandhu used to come and visit sometimes too. One time he and Aryapriya and I danced down the street in the warm summer rain. The street and the rain and our bodies and happy faces seemed more vivid then, really alive.) For a few months, we had a study group that Baladitya hosted. Each week, we would watch and then discuss a video from the series by Joseph Campbell called The Transformation of Myth through time. It was incredibly rich material. Baladitya felt that the ability to recollect and remember things was absolutely crucial in spiritual life. He could remember bits of his past life(s). He also told us about the Newgrange ancient burial mound in Ireland. The body of the deceased would be laid out on a stone platform in the central chamber. There was an aperture into the chamber so that on the winter solstice (when the nights were longest, when light and life seemed at their lowest ebb), the angle of the sun would be such that

sunlight would flood through the aperture and onto the platform where the body was laid out. The place was constructed so that it was only on the winter solstice that light would enter the chamber in this way. It seems that the people who built the place believed that on that day, the soul of the deceased would travel back up along the beams of sunlight to be reunited with its origin and true home, the sun.

Paramajyoti In 1982 I walked into a building site at no 18 Approach Road near the London Buddhist Centre and was introduced to Wade McKee. He was a working class lad from Bethnal Green and myself having grown up in the middle class suburbs south of London it was surprising that we made any connection. But we did and worked together quite solidly for the next two years, went on retreat together and also did other things like watching football on TV. At work he sometimes used to sing and was known to do a mean version of the cowboy song Four Legged Friend.

Wade was ordained as Baladitya in 1984, myself in 1985 and I think he might have been a bit disappointed that we were not ordained the same year. After ordination we went our separate ways but came into contact again in the 1990s both in London and in the USA at Aryaloka. The last time I saw him was on an Order Convention at Wymondham Uk when he told me he was thinking of going to live in Thailand. I could not help shedding a few tears when I learnt of his recent death. I can recall many enjoyable moments spent in his company and wish him well on his journey.

Mahabodhi This will be a bit brief but I just want to say a few words about my friend Baladitya. I met Baladitya through the Buddhafield festival, probably around the year 2000, and over the years we developed a bit of a bond. He came to be someone who I felt I could have deeper kinds of conversations with, often around the campfire in the meditation crew area. It is hard to pin it down but I felt he had a kind of wisdom: an incisiveness and broadness of interest about him that probably came through thinking a lot and having a somewhat hermit-like existence, most recently in Brighton, where he has been living with Kevala and Dharmabandu. I felt he would often take a very interesting angle on things that others might overlook, and being a bit interested in the broader perspective I appreciated the conversations I had with him. I also appreciated his strong commitment to his friends: in particular to Dhiramati, Dharmabandu and Kevala, and I witnessed him very actively watching out for them at times when they might be struggling. When he got married in Thailand to a middle-aged Thai woman who was having, out of necessity, to work in a bar, I think there was a strong sense he knew he was in a position to make a difference to her life, and to the life of her child. And he acted on that compassionate urge, supported them through the year, living in Thailand for a few months every year. I wonder how many people know this about him. Anyway Baladitya, I hope you go well in the bardo, and thankyou for the positive contribution you have made to my life. Good luck!

Shantinayaka Baladitya was the first order member I met. He was leading the introductory meditation course I went along to in Harlow, near London, in January 1985. He was just back from his ordination retreat in Tuscany, very earnest and a little anxious about teaching. He was very supportive, inviting me to visit him at the London Buddhist Centre and, a little later, to go on a week-long retreat at Padmaloka. When he found out I had lived in the USA and still spent time there, often in Seattle, he introduced me to Aryadaka. So, in the late 80s, on my visits to Seattle the three of us would often get together as Baladitya would come down from Vancouver BC where he was living and running classes, sometimes bringing a group of people with him for a retreat. That's when I met Marcus Mendes, now Aryabodhi, who ran FWBO activities in Vancouver when Baladitya moved back to England. In 1990 I was ordained at Guhyaloka, and Baladitya was on the support team. He was a good friend to me during the retreat, even though the support team sometimes seemed to be having a difficult

time. Hikes with Baladitya, whether in the mountains near Seattle or around Guhyaloka always included a stop for tea. He would get out his little spirit stove and kettle and brew up using proper tea, never tea bags. The World Cup was on during the retreat and Baladitya would walk to the village and back each evening to get the results of the day's match and leave a note under a rock for those who needed to know. I haven't seen a lot of him In recent years, occasionally we would meet on a convention, but I often think of him, and always with affection and gratitude for his support and encouragement during those early years, and his always practical help - the tea, the extra sleeping-bag, the blade he made from a flint to cut the bread and cheese the time we forgot to bring a knife, and the football results.

Thiradhamma Baladitya always got a kick out of an American trying to emulate a Brit's pronunciation of commonly used, specifically English words. His favorite was 'knackered' - we just couldn't seem to manage that one. So, it's with an emulation of Baladitya's wry, mischievous smile and the playfulness that peeked out from behind his eyes that I offer a tip-o'-the-hat and a hearty Fare Thee Well, Myte!

Vessantara Of course, you always need to hold plans lightly, as you never know what will happen. There was another reminder of that this week, with the very sad news of the death of Baladitya, whom I knew well. I led his ordination course and I often spent time with him when he lived in Bristol and I was president of the Centre there. He had travelled a great deal and, more than most people, his explorations of the outer world were also voyages into his inner world particularly some of his experiences in South America, which he had written up, and would read to me. He was quite a character, and I often found his view of the world intriguing and original. He could also be very generous. For instance, he once gave me a large art book with reproductions of old paintings of the Western USA, because they evoked something for him, and he wanted me to understand and appreciate them. So I'm thinking of Baladitya and also of Dharmabandhu, Kevala and his other friends. With all good wishes, Vessantara.

Khemajoti Maybe awareness of death is bringing more sense of urgency - later today I will be going to the funeral of Vimalavajri's Dad. We sat with his body after he had died the week before last. And the next day had the news of Baladitya's death. On Friday we had a little memorial eve for him here in Bristol where he had lived for a number of years. I worked with him for a few years in evolution. He was the sort of person, who just by his very way of being, challenged me. I used to feel so straight, so conventional, so bound by rules when I was with him. It was an uncomfortable feeling but one I was also grateful for. It was good to hear more of his life story. He had done a lot for the Movement over the years - hopefully others who knew him better will write more.

Vajradevi My thoughts have been with Baladitya and friends who knew him well. I didn't, but we were fond of each other and had known each other just a bit over a very long time. I remember him coming off retreat at Vajraloka and telling me he had sung the whole way back to London in the car with Paramartha amongst others. The singing was because they were all coming back to busy lives and couldn't afford to land feeling too sensitive. In Baladitya's case he was helping us out in the Cherry Orchard restaurant so this would have been in the late 80's when I worked there. I loved his eccentricities but truthfully, probably couldn't have coped with too much of it or him in one go!

Older memories Susiddhi Shabda, 12.10.2009. Hello everyone, I don't have a lot to say about myself today. Maybe just to assure you that I am well and happy and living in my little flat in Sheffield and to recommend chapter four of Maitreyabandhu's book. That chapter itself is well worth the ten quid. I really want to remind all those who participated in the men's ordination retreat at Il Convento, from September to December 1984, how great it was and how, twenty-five years later, we still have connections between us all because of these three months. So, wind your mind back to a red brick, slightly tumble-down but very atmospheric monastery cum opera venue, glorious, glorious weather, the shrine room, the kitchen, the dining room, the loggia, the long corridors, the lion terrace and the panoramic views. Now remember with pleasure the people who shared the experience with you. Bhante was there the whole time. Remember a geezer called Dobson sculpting a bust of Bhante. Remember also hearing Bhante read 'Journey to Il Convento'. I think Prasannasiddhi was Bhante's batman but he was so quiet I don't have a definite memory of him. Aryacitta and Aryadaka had their private ordinations first as the two most long-standing mitras. Unfortunately, Aryadaka has since died but Aryacitta is doing heroic trailblazing in Southend (Saffend to him). Then, in alphabetical order, came

Baladitya the traveller, Dharmabandhu

(affectionately known as Cap'n to his olive picking team), Dharmamudra Dobson, Indrabodhi (one of the many 'arties' from Brighton), and Kuladitya of the public ordination suit and tie! Manjunatha used to do karate practice on the lion terrace every day at lunchtime. Ratnabodhi gave long and elegant talks - even when Bhante was in the audience. Satyaloka, Satyaraja and Satyananda were all ordained on the same evening and now have a continent each to shine in. Then comes Shantavira who (I hope) won't dare to blackball this letter even if arrives on the deadline. [Compiler's note: Susiddhi's contribution arrived, on paper, in plenty

of time. I have enjoyed typing it up, and reminiscing.] Finally we had two slim chappies - Jnanavira who had a literary career in Japan and now has an academic career in Australia, and Vajranatha, ex England, ex South America, and now living in Valencia. Vessantara very ably led the team - right through from March of that year. He was backed up by the harmonious team itself - comprising Abhaya, Dipankara, Kamalasila, Padmavajra, Sarvamitra and Susiddhi as well as Devamitra and Lalitavajra who went down to the plain to do the shopping twice a week as well as everything else. May be all be well and happy and remember Aryadaka and each other with fondness and gratitude.

Aryadaka Seattle, Shabda 2000 nov I have so much appreciated the few friends like Punya, Chintamani,

Baladitya and Buddhadasa

who took time out of their lives to meet and spend substantial time with me this past year while my health was failing. I realize just how rare that sort of friendship is. When I was healthy I was much more popular because I had something to give. Now I am much more cautious where I give the limited energy I have. Many acquaintances, though they care, are just too busy to find time for the chronically ill.

Aryacitta Vajraloka Retreat Centre N. Wales, Shabda 2001 dec The best night I spent in Il Convento was after the retreat was over and there was no room for me in the bedrooms any more so I decided to sleep on the Lion Terrace. It got a little damp during the night not from rain but because of the dew and condensation but the sky was clear and spectacular with stars. Later

Baladitya joined me - not in the same bed I hasten to add; but out on the terrace.

In the morning, instead of chain saws and dogs barking, a nearby Italian household treated us to a

new age canned rendition of Una Furtiva Lagrima whatever it is they should stamp it out as soon as possible. Then it was off to Roma with Baladitya and Dhammabandhu. We saw a real game of Italian Football. Seeing Lazio beat Fiorentina 3-0. Italian football supporters certainly know how to enjoy themselves going berserk with ecstasy every time their team came close to the opposition's goal. Then there was the archaeological tour round the Roman ruins putting Age of Empires 2 in context, padding out the truth behind Gladiator - the film. There was St Peters; the Vatican; travelling on the buses; being picked up by a Brazilian coffee salesman; teaching Baladitya how to read a map; walking over a very special bridge with angels stuck all over it to a castle and meeting up with order members in Rome's central Railway station. Simple pleasures.

Dharmabandhu Bethnal Green, Shabda 2005 jan Dear Bhante, brothers and sisters in the Dharma, I'd like to end send you a poetic/rap thing that I wrote last spring whilst staying in Kamalasilaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hermitage, so you have to read it with a beat. Dear Bhante, dear brothers dear sisters too/ I cant write poetry only doggerel comes through/ but at least its a line from me to you/ Cos all those big words, critique words, sometimes just dont do / I went up a mountain for nearly 3 years/ trying to make sense of my life and my fears/ did I make it or did I fake it, who knows, who cares?/ Yes I made it, didnt fake it, at times it was good/ even if on some days I coughed up blood/ not real blood dont worry/ I dont want to be misunderstood. To tell you the truth the Vihara's quite a place, / and on some days I think I saw my own face/ which seemed to me to be a disgrace/

and I'm not the ace, that I thought I was/ And often I didnt formally meditate/, and often I was in quite a state, but usually I managed to wash my own plate/ even if that was sometimes late./ So what I'm really trying to say is, the Vihara did its trick/ and I felt humiliated and really quite thick/ and not the super hero that I thought I was/ and not the great meditator cos, I hadnt done the spade work/ so back down I've come, hobbling and limping and really quite numb/ Now I'm back down again, 8 months have gone/ whats happening, who am I, what the hells goin on?/ Yes I left the 'Secret Valley', Guhyaloka known to some/ and fell from my lofty perch into the arms of someone, / luckily they were soft and warm/ Oh what have I done 3 weeks in Madrid with her and then I wandered home/ back to good ol London town to see my mate John, / whose now at Guhyaloka, / and good ol John has gone and he's called Cittavasin now/ Sadhu mate well gone!/ Next I went to Bristol and worked the Evolution shop/ with my mate

Baladitya until we both did drop/

well Xmas time in a Shopping Mall, and they shopped./ My shop mates they were good men and we did have some fun/ but that Mall it drove me crazy and I did have to run./ Up North I went to Grimsby, / to spend time with me dear ol dad/ he's 87 now and still quite a lad/ 12 years Royal Navy, went through the war/ sailed the Atlantic Convoys, and much moreâ&#x20AC;Ś

Manjupriya Sorocaba, Shabda 2005 oct Dear folks, The combined Convention was great. I also had a very memorable trip back down to London with Ratnajyoti in his car, listening to great folk music on a glorious English summer's day driving below 60 behind Padmapani and

Baladitya (who were also trying to drive more

economically) - which crescendo-ed in a Little Chef chat about life, the Order and what's it all about, as far as I remember. The world seemed to shake, quiver and expand a little during that wee Little Chef chat o roonie. To be serious, not being around for the discussions on how things are changing in the order, it was refreshing getting all sorts of different angles in a short space of time. Thanks once again Ratnajyoti for the lift and the chat, for Padmapani for the space in his flat for my boxes and to Baladitya for your Red Indian Squaw story.

Dayaratna Last time we met was Devapriya's funeral. Baladitya was glad he had made a point of visiting Devapriya before he died so he could thank him for believing in him when others did not in the early 80's. He then went off to visit Mahaprabha who seemed at death's door thinking it may be his last chance to see him.

Baladitya in his own words Facebook, 24 February 2012 I went into the Wat last night and walked around the grounds and took a couple of photos but never saw anything at all strange, in fact I find it quite a casual place even though it was very dark. This is probably because the grounds of a Wat in Thailand are similar to the commons in an English village. Everything happens there from political rallies to pop concerts with dancing girls and lots of drunk teenagers getting into fights. So although it was very dark not very spooky, even though when I looked up I could see the milky way, this is another way of knowing that I'm not in Blighty. Facebook, 5 November 2012 just a word on Devapriya... I was able to spend quite a bit of time with him on the last Buddhafield festival, we even made plans to travel in Thailand together later in the year or early next. I remember feeling then this would be the last time I saw him, so used the opportunity accordingly. He was always generous with his time and energy with me ever since I met him in 1982 and he even gave me my first job when I returned to the movement in that year. I remember one early evening around that time when he just turned up at the place where I lived in Old Ford Rd and asked if I wanted to go for a drive. An hour or so later we were well onto the M4 heading for Glastonbury via an old cow track where we got well and truly bogged down with me having to push the car out 150 yards or so to the road whilst wondering what on earth I'd gotten myself into. Never a dull moment with him! He was a kind man who was always ready with his time and energy and with me at least never held a grudge even after one of the most energetic shouting matches of my life. before he died I was able to thank him for his friendship when we first met and told him he was a star in setting us all an example in how to live under the most difficult of physical conditions. I'll not forget him anytime soon and will look forward to meeting him again.

ever held a grudge even after one of the most energetic shouting matches of my life. before he died I was able to thank him for his friendship when we first met and told him he was a stagain.