Harvest - Jim and Jen Cowart - Hand Me Downs - Print Curriculum

C O N T E N T

S

Endorsements by Adam Hamilton, Matthew Hartsfield and Bishop James King Foreword by Rick Warren Introduction by Jim and Jennifer Cowart Using This Workbook (Read This First) Outline for Each Session

4 6 8 10 12

SESSIONS Session One: LEAVING A LEGACY 16 Session Two: MODELING HOLY HABITS 40 Session Three: BREAKING BAD CYCLES 66 Session Four: LIVING WITH INTEGRITY 88 Session Five: PLAYING WELL WITH OTHERS 106 Session Six: DOING GOD’S WILL 128

Copyright 2015 by Jim and Jen Cowart.

ALL RIGHTS RESERVED Published by Byron Printing, Byron, Georgia Copyright and use of the curriculum template is retained by Brett Eastman.

Unless otherwise noted, all Scripture quotes are taken from the HOLY BIBLE, NEW INTERNATIONAL VERSION®. Copyright 1973, 1978, 1984 and 2011 by Biblica, Inc.® Used by permission. All rights reserved worldwide.

ISBN Printed in the United States of America

APPENDICES Frequently Asked Questions Small Group Agreement Small Group Calendar Spiritual Partners Small Group Roster Memory Verse Cards (Clip and Review) Prayer and Praise Report

150 152 156 158 159 160 161 163

SMALL GROUP LEADERS Hosting an Open House Leading for the First Time Leadership Training 101 About the Authors Worship Song Lyrics

164 165 166 168 174 176

ENDORSEMENTS “Jim and Jennifer are remarkable people whose love for

Adam Hamilton

Sr. Pastor, United Methodist Church of The Resurrection, Leawood, Kansas

Matthew Hartsfield

Lead Pastor, Van Dyke United MEthodist Church Lutz, Florida

James King

Bishop of the South Georgia Conference of the United Methodist Church

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Christ is evident to all who know them. Their ministry has touched tens of thousands of people. Their new study, HandMe-Downs, is focused on helping Christians to experience a deeper faith and to pass it on to future generations. As a parent and now a grandparent, leaving my children and granddaughter a legacy of faith is the one goal that matters most to me. Hand-Me-Downs is an important resource in helping to fulfill this goal.”

“Jim and Jennifer Cowart are warm and engaging communicators who bring the Bible to life. I’m so excited they and their team have produced Hand-Me-Downs.

This is a positive and practical experience which helps people enter into thoughtful reflection, leading to a healthy atmosphere for action and life change. Jim and Jennifer are the real deal. Their powerful teaching and ministry leadership are a sincere expression of their authentic relationship with Jesus Christ. Throughout our years of friendship, I have personally benefited from their natural hand-me-downs of love, grace and faithfulness.”

“Want to get better? Hand-Me-Downs has been created

by Jim and Jennifer Cowart to help you grow in your faith through a small group experience as you live into the fullness of God’s plan for your life. This is a fresh new way to get small groups together to easily focus on the word of God and discuss with others how the teaching session connects with where you are and how you can continue grow as you seek to grow closer God through Jesus Christ.”

 endorsements 

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FOREWORD by rick warren

Jim and Jen Cowart

planted this church about 14 years ago and I have watched this church every year grow stronger, grow deeper, grow healthier, grow larger, and grow more visionary year after year after year. In fact, this church has the honor of being one of Saddleback’s Church Health Award winners! We are pretty picky about the churches that we honor because they have to be balanced in worship, in fellowship, in discipleship, in ministry, and in evangelism. They are doing the purposes of God through the processes that balance all of these things. They have the strategy and the structure that allow them to grow year after year after year. I have asked Jim and Jen to really help the churches, particularly on the East Coast, who really want to be more purpose driven. What does it mean to be purpose driven? We believe, and the Bible teaches in Acts 2, and John 17, and in Ephesians 4 and other places, that God wants your church to be built around God’s eternal purposes. There are 5 of those purposes. Not 4, not 6, not 7. They are modeled by the church in Acts 2,

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they are prayed for by Jesus in John 17, they are explained

by Paul in Ephesians 4, but they are best seen in the Great Commandment and the Great Commission. We believe that a great commitment to the Great Commandment and the Great Commission will grow a great church. This is no theory, friend, this works. We’ve seen it work in rural areas, urban areas, and suburban areas, and regardless of the size or the denomination of your church, you can be built around the purposes of God.

“You know, one of my favorite churches in all of America is Harvest Church in Byron, Georgia.

—Rick Warren

 foreword 

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Welcome to Hand-Me-Downs!

When you hear the term hand-me-downs, you may think of worn-out shoes passed down by your sister, or your brother’s old broken down bike that you were given as a kid. That is one form of hand-me-downs, but in this study we’re going to focus on a much more important kind—the hand-me-downs of faith.

During the next six weeks you’ll have the chance to reflect on the faith heritage you’ve received, whether good or bad, and then determine the legacy you want to leave for others. You will also have opportunities to share your own ideas and experiences, watch a short video teaching on that week’s theme, discuss scriptures and determine how you will apply what God is teaching you. As a special bonus, we hope that you will be building friendships with those in your group.

I N T R O D U C T I O N  WELCOME TO OUR NEW STUDY!

At the end of each chapter, you will find Daily Devotions with space for you to create your own plan of action in how you will apply what you’re learning. We hope that you will take the time to slow down over this six weeks and allow God to speak to you about the legacy you are creating. By participating in this study, you will be learning with a large group in church, a small group in a living room, and alone during your daily quiet time.

We’re excited about what God has in store for you and your group over the next few weeks, and we’re praying that you will experience God in a fresh new way as a result of this study.

Blessings, Jim and Jen

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 introduction 

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USING THIS WORKBOOK TOOLS TO HELP YOU HAVE A GREAT SMALL GROUP EXPERIENCE!

1. Notice in the Table of Contents there are three

sections: (1) Sessions; (2) Appendices; and (3) Small Group Leaders. Familiarize yourself with the Appendices. Some of them will be used in the sessions themselves.

2. If

you are facilitating/leading or co-leading a small group, the section Small Group Leaders will give you some hard-learned experiences of others that will encourage you and help you avoid many common obstacles to effective small group leadership.

3. Use

Pray before each session—for your group members, for your time together, and for wisdom and insights.

this workbook as a guide, not a straightjacket. If the group responds to the lesson in an unexpected but honest way, go with that. If you think of a better question than the next one in the lesson, ask it. Take to heart the insights included in the Frequently Asked Questions pages and the Small Group Leaders section.

4. Enjoy your small group experience.

5. Read the Outline of each Session on the next

pages so that you understand how the sessions will flow.

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 using this workbook 

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OUTLINE OF EACH SESSION

A TYPICAL GROUP SESSION FOR THE HAND-ME-DOWNS STUDY WILL INCLUDE THE FOLLOWING SECTIONS. READ THROUGH THIS TO GET A CLEAR IDEA OF HOW EACH GROUP MEETING WILL BE STRUCTURED:

who earn your trust. This section includes some simple questions to get you talking—letting you share as much or as little of your story as you feel comfortable doing. Each session typically offers you two options. You can get to know your whole group by using the icebreaker question(s), or you can check in with one or two group members, your spiritual partner(s), for a deeper connection and encouragement in your spiritual journey.

HEAR GOD’S STORY WEEKLY MEMORY VERSE

Each session opens with a Memory Verse that emphasizes an important truth from the session. This is an optional exercise, but we believe that memorizing Scripture can be a vital part of filling our minds with God’s will for our lives. We encourage you to give this important habit a try. The verses for our six sessions are also listed in the appendix.

INTRODUCTION

Each lesson opens with a brief thought that will help you prepare for the session and get you thinking about the particular subject you will explore with your group. Make it a practice to read these before the session. You may want to have the group read them aloud.

SHARE YOUR STORY

The foundation for spiritual growth is an intimate connection with God and His family. You build that connection by sharing your story with a few people who really know you and

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In this section, you’ll read the Bible and listen to teaching, in order to hear God’s story—and begin to see how His story aligns with yours. When the study directs you to, you’ll pop in the DVD and watch a short teaching segment. You’ll then have an opportunity to read a passage of Scripture, and discuss both the teaching and the text. You won’t focus on accumulating information but on how you should live in light of the Word of God. We want to help you apply the insights from Scripture practically and creatively, from your heart as well as your head. At the end of the day, allowing the timeless truths from God’s Word to transform our lives in Christ should be your greatest aim.

STUDY NOTES

This brief section provides additional commentary, background or insights on the passage you’ll study in the Hear God’s Story section.

 using this workbook 

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CREATE A NEW STORY

God wants you to be a part of His Kingdom— to weave your story into His. That will mean change. It will require you to go His way rather than your own. This won’t happen overnight, but it should happen steadily. By making small, simple choices, we can begin to change our direction. This is where the Bible’s instructions to “be doers of the Word, not just hearers” (James 1:22) comes into play. Many people skip over this aspect of the Christian life because it’s scary, relationally awkward, or simply too much work for their busy schedules.

But Jesus wanted all of His disciples to know Him personally, carry out His commands, and help outsiders connect with Him. This doesn’t necessarily mean preaching on street corners.

It could mean welcoming newcomers, hosting a short-term group in your home, or walking through this study with a friend. In this study, you’ll have an opportunity to go beyond Bible study to biblical living. This section will also have a question or two that will challenge you to live out your faith by serving others, sharing your faith, and worshiping God.

DIGGING DEEPER

If you have time and want to dig deeper into more Bible passages about the topic at hand, we’ve provided additional passages and questions, which you can use either during the

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meeting, or as homework. Your group may choose to read and prepare before each meeting in order to cover more biblical material. Or, group members can use the additional study section during the week after the meeting.

If you prefer not to do Study homework, this section will provide you with plenty to discuss within the group. These options allow individuals or the whole group to expand their study while still accommodating those who can’t do homework or are new to your group.

DAILY DEVOTIONS

By making small, simple choices, we can begin to change our direction.

Each week on the Daily Devotions pages, we provide scriptures to read and reflect on between sessions—a month’s worth of reflections to keep God’s word near your heart.

This provides you with a chance to slow down, read just a small portion of Scripture each day, and reflect and pray through it. You’ll then have a chance to journal your response to what you’ve read and list the Action Steps God leads you to take. Use this section to seek God on your own throughout the week. This time at home should begin and end with prayer.

Don’t get in a hurry; take enough time to hear God’s direction.  using this workbook 

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There’s an old saying that “God doesn’t have any grandchildren.” In other words, each one of us must make a decision for ourselves about whether we will follow God and become His adopted son or daughter. Just because our parents, family members, or a friend is a Christian does not mean we are. Our relationship with God is not something we inherit from the generation before us—it’s our choice.

“We will not hide these truths from our children but will tell the next generation about the glorious deeds of the Lord.” Psalm 78:4a (NLT)

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However, the people close to us do influence our lives and affect the way we think about our faith.

God may not have grandchildren, but He often places grandparents, parents, and mentors in our lives who help us draw closer to Him. Perhaps you’re fortunate enough to have had some of these people who modeled what it meant to know Jesus. Or perhaps you’re a “first generation” Christian. Whether you come from a long line of believers or you’re the only one in your family, you belong to a spiritual family that needs your influence and example. Part of following Christ is leaving a legacy for others. Today we’ll learn more about what it means to “hand down” our faith.

 lea v ing a legac y 

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SHARE YOUR STORY Each of us has a story. The events of our life—good, bad, wonderful or challenging—have shaped who we are. God knows your story, and He intends to redeem it—to use every struggle and every joy to ultimately bring you to Himself.

When we share our stories with others, we give them the opportunity to see God at work.

When we share our stories, we also realize we are not alone—that we have common experiences and thoughts, and others can understand what we are going through. Your story can encourage someone else. Telling it can lead to a path of freedom for you and for those you share it with.

Open your group with prayer.

This should be a brief, simple prayer, in which you invite God to give you insight as you study.

You can pray for specific requests at the end of the meeting, or stop momentarily to pray if a particular situation comes up during your discussion.

Before you start this first meeting, get contact information for every participant. Take time to pass around a copy of the Small Group Roster on page 160, a sheet of paper, or one of you pass your Study Guide, opened to the Small Group Roster. Ask someone to make copies or type up a list with everyone’s information and email it to the group during the week.

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Begin your time together by using the following questions and activities to get people talking.

• What brought you here? What do you hope to get out of this group?

• Were you raised in a Christian home? What role did faith, or religion, play in how you grew up?

• Whether your group is new or ongoing, it’s always important to reflect on and review your values together.

On page 156 is a Small Group Agreement with the values we’ve found most useful in sustaining healthy, balanced groups. We recommend that you choose one or two values—ones you haven’t previously focused on or have room to grow in—to emphasize during this study.

Choose ones that will take your group to the next stage of intimacy and spiritual health.

 lea v ing a legac y 

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• We recommend you rotate host homes on a regular basis and let the hosts lead the meeting. Studies show that healthy groups rotate leadership. This helps to develop every member’s ability to shepherd a few people in a safe environment. Even Jesus gave others the opportunity to serve alongside Him (Mark 6:30-44). Look at the FAQs in the Appendicies for additional information about hosting or leading the group.

• The Small Group Calendar on page 158 is a tool for planning who will host and lead each meeting. Take a few minutes to plan hosts and leaders for your remaining meetings. Don’t skip this important step! It will revolutionize your group.

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If your group is new, welcome newcomers.

Introduce everyone— you may even want to have nametags for your first meeting.

 lea v ing a legac y 

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Use this space to record key thoughts, questions, and things you want to remember or follow up on.

After watching the video, have someone read the discussion questions in the Hear God’s Story section and direct the discussion among the group. As you go through each of the subsequent sections, ask someone else to read the questions and direct the discussion.

WATCH THE DVD

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 lea v ing a legac y 

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1. Who has poured into your life the way Lois, Eunice and Paul poured into Timothy’s life?

HE AR GOD’S STORY READ 2 TIMOTHY 1:3-14.

“ I thank God whom I serve, as did my ancestors, with a clear

conscience, as I remember you constantly in my prayers night and day. As I remember your tears, I long to see you, that I may be filled with joy. I am reminded of your sincere faith, a faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois and your mother Eunice and now, I am sure, dwells in you as well.

For this reason I remind you to fan into flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying own of my hands, for God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control.

Therefore do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord, nor of me his prisoner, but share in suffering for the gospel by the power of God, who saved us and called us to a holy calling, not because of our works but because of his own purpose and grace, which he gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began, and which now has been manifested through the appearing of our Savior Christ Jesus, who abolished death and brought life and immortality to light through the gospel, for which I was appointed a preacher and apostle and teacher, which is why I suffer as I do. But I am not ashamed, for I know whom I have believed, and I am convinced that he is able to guard until that Day what has been entrusted to me. Follow the pattern of the sound words that you have heard from me, in the faith and love that are in Christ Jesus. By the Holy Spirit who dwells within us, guard the good deposit entrusted to you.”

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2. In verse 6, Timothy is encouraged to fan into flame the gifts of God within him. How might he, and we, accomplish this?

3. Paul encourages Timothy to guard the “good deposit” he has received. How might he have done that in a time of Christian persecution?

 lea v ing a legac y 

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STUDY NOTES

Singer/songwriter Sara Groves explores the idea of legacy in her song “Generations.” It’s full of great insights on both the positive and negative longterm consequences of our choices, and an encouragement to “pass on a blessing” to those coming after us—even the ones we won’t live to meet.

Here are the lyrics; consider finding a version of the song on Spotify or YouTube and listening to it this week.

“GENERATIONS”

I can taste the fruit of Eve I’m aware of sickness, death and disease The results of her choices are vast Eve was the first but she wasn’t the last And if I were honest with myself Had I been standing at that tree My mouth and my hands would be covered with fruit Things I shouldn’t know and things I shouldn’t see

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And to say that the devil made me do it Is a cop out and a lie The devil can’t make me do anything When I’m calling on Jesus Christ Remind me of this with every decision Generations will reap what I sow I can pass on a curse or a blessing To those I will never know

Remind me of this with every decision Generations will reap what I sow I can pass on a curse or a blessing To those I will never know

To my great, great, great granddaughter Live in peace To my great, great, great grandson Live in peace To my great, great, great granddaughter Live in peace To my great, great, great grandson Live in peace, oh, live in peace

She taught me to fear the serpent I’m learning the fear myself And all of the things I am capable of In my search for wisdom, acceptance and wealth

Remind me of this with every decision Generations will reap what I sow I can pass on a curse or a blessing To those I will never know

HAND-ME-DOWNS

 lea v ing a legac y 

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In this section, talk about how you will apply the wisdom you’ve learned from the teaching and Bible study. Then think about practical steps you can take in the coming week to live out what you’ve learned.

1. What is one positive hand-me-down that you are passing on to those around you?

CREATE A NEW STORY God wants you to be part of His kingdom—to weave your story into His. That will mean change—to go His way rather than your own.

This won’t happen overnight, but it should happen steadily. By starting with small, simple choices, we begin to change our direction. The Holy Spirit helps us along the way—giving us gifts to serve the body, offering us insights into Scripture, and challenging us to love not only those around us but those far from God.

2. What is one aspect of your legacy that you would like to change? How can this group help you do that?

3.

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When people consider your legacy, what would you like them to say?

 lea v ing a legac y 

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Take a look at the Circles of Life diagram below and write the names of two or three people you know who need to know Christ. Commit to praying for God’s guidance and an opportunity to share with each of them.

Perhaps they would be open to joining the group? Share your lists with the group so you can all be praying for the people you’ve identified.

4. This week how will you interact with the Bible? Can you

commit to spending time in daily prayer or study of God’s Word? Use the Daily Devotions section to guide you.

Tell the group how you plan to follow Jesus this week, and then, at your next meeting, talk about your progress and challenges.

5. Stack your hands just a sports team does in the huddle

and commit to taking a risk and going deeper in your group and in your relationships with each other.

6. To close your time together,

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spend some time worshipping God together—praying, singing, reading Scripture.

• Have someone use their musical gifts to lead the group in a worship song.

Try singing a capella, using a worship CD, or have someone accompany your singing with a musical instrument.

Consider someone—in this group or outside it—that you can begin going deeper with in an intentional way. This might be your mom or dad, a cousin, an aunt or uncle, a roommate, a college buddy, or a neighbor.

Choose someone who might be open to “doing life” with you at a deeper level and pray about that opportunity.

• Choose a Psalm or other favorite verse and read it aloud together. Make it a time of praise and worship, as the words remind you of all God has done for you.

• Ask, “How can we pray for you this week?” Invite everyone to share, but don’t force the issue. Be sure to write prayer requests on your Prayer and Praise Report on page 163.

• Close your meeting with prayer.  lea v ing a legac y 

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Read Psalm 78:1-8.

DIGGING DEEPER

1. Why is it so important to talk about our heritage with our kids?

2. How can we share God with the next generation?

If you feel God nudging you to go deeper, take some time before the next meeting to dig into His Word. Explore the Bible passages related to this session’s theme on your own and jot your reflections in a journal or in this study guide. A great way to gain insight on a passage is to read it in several different translations.

You may want to use a Bible app or website to compare translations.

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3. What are the implications of this scripture for your country, family, and life?

 lea v ing a legac y 

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DIGGING DEEPER continued

Read Joshua 24:14-18.

4. What does it mean to fear God?

5. What word appears five times in verses 14 and 15? What

does this tell you about one way we can build our families and leave a legacy?

6. How does Joshua’s example with his own family encourage the people? What is their response?

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DAILY DEVOTIONALS Day 1• Read Deuteronomy 6:6-7

These commandments that I give you today are to be upon your hearts. Impress them on your children. Talk about them when you sit at home and when you walk along the road, when you lie down and when you get up.

Respond:

How can you keep God’s commandments on your heart?

What are some ways to impress them on your children?

My Action Steps: Day 2 • Read 2 Timothy 2:2

And the things you have heard me say in the presence of many witnesses entrust to reliable men who will also be qualified to teach others.

Respond:

Our legacy is not limited to our families. How can you share your wisdom with friends or colleagues who can continue your work when you’re gone?

My Action Steps:

Day 3 • Read Joshua 4: 6-7

In the future, when your children ask you, “What do these stones mean?” tell them that the flow of the Jordan was cut off before the ark of the covenant of the Lord. When it crossed the Jordan, the waters of the Jordan were cut off. These stones are to be a memorial to the people of Israel forever.

Respond:

Several times in Scripture, God instructs His people to use tangible objects as symbols of His faithfulness and as “teaching points” for future generations. How might you apply this idea to your own family?

My Action Steps:

Day 4 • Read Psalm 103:17-18

But from everlasting to everlasting the Lord’s love is with those who fear Him, and His righteousness with their children’s children—with those who keep His covenant and remember to obey his precepts.

Respond:

What does verse 18 say we should do if we want the Lord to reach future generations? How does this contribute to our “children’s children” knowing God?

My Action Steps:

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 lea v ing a legac y 

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Day 5 • Read 1 Corinthians 15:3-5

For what I received I passed on to you as of first importance: that Christ died for our sins according to the Scriptures, that He was buried, that He was raised on the third day according to the Scriptures, and that He appeared to Cephas, and then to the Twelve.

Respond:

Paul both received the faith and passed it on, emphasizing its importance. Who needs to receive the faith you have to share? Ask God to give you opportunities to pass it on.

My Action Steps: Day 6

Use the following space to write any thoughts God has put in your heart and mind about the things we have looked at in this session and during your Daily Devotions time this week.

“THESE COMMANDMENTS THAT I GIVE YOU TODAY ARE TO BE UPON YOUR HEARTS. IMPRESS THEM ON YOUR CHILDREN.” Deuteronomy 6:6-7

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Nature or nurture? It’s an ongoing debate. Some things we’re just born with—the color of our hair, the way we laugh, whether we’re more outgoing or more shy. Other things are the result of what we experience and how we’re raised. A baby born in France will learn French, while a child growing up in Spain will speak Spanish.

“Take the time and trouble to keep yourself spiritually fit.” 1 Timothy 4:7 (Ph)

Scientists debate whether nature or nurture is most important, but almost all of them agree both are significant. You were born with unique personality traits and characteristics, and you’ve also been molded and shaped by your life and by the people in it.

This is great news when it comes to our own roles as parents, friends, and family members. While we can’t change another person’s basic nature, we can have a huge impact on their nurture. In fact, God’s Word tells us we’re called to do just that! From the words we say to the things we do, our choices can model what it looks like to have a relationship with Jesus. Today we’ll take a closer look at the huge privilege and responsibility we have to “nurture” other people through our example.

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 modeling hol y habits 

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Begin your time together by using the following questions and activities to get people talking:

1. What is one genetic trait that was passed on to you that

SHARE YOUR STORY

you like? (Eye color, curly hair, height, strength, athletic ability, etc.)

2. What is a hand-me-down, genetic or environmental, that you can have done without?

As we said last week, when we share our stories with others, we give them the opportunity to see God at work.

Your story is being shaped, even in this moment, by being part of this group. In fact, few things can shape us more than community.

Open your group with prayer. This should be a brief, simple prayer, in which you invite God to be with you as you meet. You can pray for specific requests at the end of the meeting, or stop momentarily to pray if a particular situation comes up during your discussion.

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When we share our stories, we can encourage someone else, and learn. We experience the presence of God, as He helps us be brave enough to reveal our thoughts and feelings.

3. When has a bad habit gotten you into trouble?

 modeling hol y habits 

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YOU MAY WANT TO PAIR UP WITH SOMEONE IN YOUR GROUP.(WE SUGGEST THAT MEN PARTNER WITH MEN AND WOMEN WITH WOMEN.) THIS PERSON WILL BE YOUR SPIRITUAL PARTNER FOR THE REST OF THIS STUDY. HE OR SHE DOESN’T HAVE TO BE YOUR BEST FRIEND. INSTEAD, THIS PERSON WILL SIMPLY ENCOURAGE YOU TO COMPLETE THE GOALS YOU SET FOR YOURSELF DURING THIS STUDY. FOLLOWING THROUGH ON A RESOLUTION IS TOUGH WHEN YOU’RE ON YOUR OWN; IT MAKES ALL THE DIFFERENCE TO HAVE A PARTNER TO CHEER YOU ON.

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 modeling hol y habits 

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Watch the DVD for this session now. Use the space provided to record key thoughts, questions, and things you want to remember or follow up on. After the video, have someone read the discussion questions in the Hear God’s Story section and direct the discussion among the group. As you go through each of the subsequent sections, ask someone else to read the questions and direct the discussion.

WATCH THE DVD

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 modeling hol y habits 

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HEAR GOD’S STORY After viewing the DVD, use the following questions to guide your discussion of the teaching from the video.

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 modeling hol y habits 

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Read 1 Timothy 4:7-9 Have nothing to do with godless myths and old wives’ tales; rather, train yourself to be godly. For physical training is of some value, but godliness has value for all things, holding promise for both the present life and the life to come. This is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance.

1. What myths or tales might these early Christians have been influenced by?

2. How do we train ourselves to be godly?

3. How is spiritual training superior to physical training?

4. What value does godliness have in this life? In the life to come?

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 modeling hol y habits 

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STUDY NOTES

In his well-known book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, author Stephen Covey discusses the importance of “beginning with the end in mind.”

This habit centers around the idea that we make better decisions now when we know what our ultimate goals are.

He writes, “[This habit] is based on imagination--the ability to envision in your mind what you cannot at present see with your eyes. It is based on the principle that all things are created twice. There is a mental (first) creation, and a physical (second) creation. The physical creation follows the mental, just as a building follows a blueprint.”

In the video, Jen talks about a friend who shared a similar idea by encouraging her to think about who she wanted her kids to someday be as adults, and to let that goal influence her daily choices. She imagined what a parenting “win” looked like, and then made the decision to intentionally influence her kids in ways consistent with that win.

Whether you’re a parent or not, you can begin with the end in mind. In each of your important relationships, envision the “win” and consider what that means for how you think about your time, your habits, and your daily decisions.

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CREATE A NEW STORY

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God wants you to be part of His kingdom—to weave your story into His. That will mean change—to go His way rather than your own.

This won’t happen overnight, but it should happen steadily. By starting with small, simple choices, we begin to change our direction. The Holy Spirit helps us along the way—giving us gifts to serve the body, offering us insights into Scripture, and challenging us to love not only those around us but those far from God.

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CREATE A NEW STORY 1. Of the four habits Jen mentions—spending time in God’s Word, spending time in prayer, honoring God through giving, and gathering with other believers—which one is easiest for you? Which one is most difficult?

4. Many of these habits are personal; they’re things we often 2. Why is it so important that we spend time with other

do on our own. How can we appropriately include others in these habits, especially our children?

Christians? How does that connect to this week’s idea of modeling spiritual growth?

5. Are you “wholeheartedly” passing on your faith? If not, 3. Do you have a story about how any or all of these hab-

what’s standing in your way?

its have helped you during a tough time? If so, consider sharing it with the group.

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6. Here are some simple ways to connect with

7. To

God. Tell the group which ones you plan to try this week, and talk about your progress and challenges when you meet next time.

• PRAYER

• DAILY DEVOTIONS

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Commit to personal prayer and daily connection with God. You may find it helpful to write your prayers in a journal.

The Daily Devotions provided in each session offer an opportunity to read a short Bible passage five days a week during the course of our study. In our hurry-up world, we often move too quickly through everything—even reading God’s Word! Slow down. Don’t just skim, but take time to read carefully and reflect on the passage. Write down your insights on what you read each day.

Copy a portion of Scripture on a card and tape it somewhere in your line of sight, such as your car’s dashboard or the bathroom mirror. Or text it to yourself!

Think about it when you sit at red lights or while you’re eating a meal. Reflect on what God is saying to you through these words. On the sixth day summarize what God has shown you throughout the week.

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close your time together, spend some time worshipping God together: praying, singing, or reading Scripture.

• Have someone use their musical gifts to lead the group in a worship song. Try singing a capella, using a worship CD, or have someone accompany your singing with a musical instrument.

• Choose a Psalm or other favorite verse and read it aloud together.

Make it a time of praise and worship, as the words remind you of all God has done for you.

• Ask, “How can we pray for you this week?” Invite everyone to share, but don’t force the issue.

Be sure to write prayer requests on your Prayer and Praise Report on page 163.

• Close your meeting with prayer.

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DIGGING DEEPER If you feel God is nudging you to go deeper, take some time between now and our next meeting to dig into His Word.

Explore the Bible passages related to this session’s theme on your own, jotting your reflections in a journal or in this study guide. Want to go deeper? Select a few verses and try paraphrasing them: writing them in your own words. If you like, share them with the group the next time you meet.

Read 1 Timothy 4:7-9.

1. In verse 4, Paul seems to be saying we shouldn’t focus on

things that distract us from God. What are some of those things in your life?

2. What

are some ways we train ourselves to be more physically fit? How might we make ourselves more spiritually fit?

3.

How is spiritual training more important than physical training?

4. How does becoming more like Jesus improve our lives now? What makes it a goal worth pursuing?

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DAILY DEVOTIONALS Day 1 • Read Proverbs 27:17

As iron sharpens iron, so one man sharpens another.

Respond:

How do people “sharpen” one another? Who is playing this role in your life? Are you sharpening anyone else?

Day 3 • Read 2 Timothy 4:2

Preach the word; be prepared in season and out of season; correct, rebuke and encourage—with great patience and careful instruction.

Respond:

This verse was written from one preacher (Paul) to another (Timothy), but it applies to any of us wanting to model a lifestyle of faith. Take a few moments to ask God for His help in following this instruction.

My Action Steps:

My Action Steps: Day 2 • Read 1 Peter 3:8

Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another, be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble.

Respond:

Which of these actions do you find easiest when it comes to relationships with others? How does living this way help you share your faith with those close to you?

My Action Steps:

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Day 4 • Read: Proverbs 22:6

Train a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.

Respond:

Of course, there are no guarantees in life—we all know people who raised their children well and the children did, in fact, “turn from it.” But the Proverbs share wisdom that is generally true for living a good life. Does this verse give you hope?

How can you grow in the way you are training your child?

My Action Steps:

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Day 5 • Read: 1 John 4:11-12

Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love each other, God lives in us and His love is made complete in us.

Respond:

You might be one of the biggest ways someone else sees God. It’s a huge responsibility but also a huge opportunity. How can you show God and His love to the people in your life today?

My Action Steps:

Day 6

Use the following space to write any thoughts God has put in your heart and mind about the things we have looked at in this session and during your Daily Devotions time this week.

“FINALLY, ALL OF YOU, LIVE IN HARMONY WITH ONE ANOTHER, BE SYMPATHETIC, LOVE AS BROTHERS, BE COMPASSIONATE AND HUMBLE.” 1 Peter 3:8

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Some of us grew up wearing a lot of hand-medowns. Perhaps these used clothes came from an older brother or sister who outgrew them, or maybe your mom swapped clothes with other moms who had kids your age. One of our friends regularly received bags of clothes from another girl at church who was three years older, and she said it was like Christmas—there was always at least one great find in each bag.

“Let us examine our ways and test them, and return to the Lord.” Lamentations 3:40

On the other hand, anyone who’s received handme-downs knows there are also items you just don’t want: the pants two sizes too small, the shirt with a band name on it that isn’t popular anymore, the winter hat that you hated wearing. Just because someone wanted to give you something doesn’t mean you always wanted to receive it.

The same is true with the values, attitudes, and beliefs that are handed down to us. As we’ve discussed the last two weeks, our family and friends may have gifted us with an amazing spiritual legacy. But we’ve probably also inherited some negative patterns and destructive habits. Today we’ll talk about how to discern what we should keep and what needs to go, and how we can create new patterns that honor God.

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1.

Did you get many hand-me-down clothes as a kid?

Did you hate it or enjoy it?

SHARE YOUR STORY Open your group with prayer. This should be a brief, simple prayer, in which you invite God to be with you as you meet. You can pray for specific requests at the end of the meeting, or stop momentarily to pray if a particular situation comes up during your discussion.

2.

What’s the hardest habit you’ve ever tried to break?

3. What’s a habit you wish was part of your life?

Sharing personal stories builds deeper connections among group members.

Begin your time together by using the following questions and activities to get people talking.

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WATCH THE DVD

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Watch the DVD for this session now. Use this space to record key thoughts, questions, and things you want to remember or follow up on.

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HEAR GOD’S STORY

Read Josiah 34:3-5.

1. What are some ways you’ve successfully formed a new habit or added a new priority to your life?

After viewing the DVD Session, use the following questions to guide your discussion of the teaching from the video.

2.

What’s something that was the “norm” in your household growing up that you now recognize was not so great? Have you carried on those patterns into your life today?

3. King Josiah inherited a huge spiritual mess from his father and grandfather. What does their story teach us about cleaning up the messes we have inherited? How does it encourage you?

4. What

does it mean to seek after God like Josiah did? How would your life change if you began seeking after Him more intentionally?

5. Finding the scriptures gave Josiah the knowledge of

what God expected and how the kingdom needed to change. How can spending time reading God’s word give insight into your own life?

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STUDY NOTES

You may be familiar with Exodus 20:5-6. It says, “I, the Lord your God, am a jealous God, punishing the children for the sin of the parents to the third and fourth generation of those who hate me, but showing love to a thousand generations of those who love me and keep my commandments.”

At first glance, this passage seems extremely unfair. Why would a loving God punish children and grandchildren for the sins and negative choices of previous generations?

First, it’s important to notice the end of this passage: God also makes a promise to extend His love to a THOUSAND generations when people follow Him. That’s more than fair!

But we must also realize that these verses are simply defining reality for the stubborn Israelites (and for the stubborn people we are today). This passage acknowledges the reality that family habits, patterns, and cycles can become generational sins. Perhaps it’s the history of alcoholism in a family, or the parent who was abused by his parents and now abuses his own child. These issues are not God’s fault; instead, they are consequences of our own choices—sometimes the choices of those who came before us.

God makes a promise to extend His love to a THOUSAND generations when people follow Him!

This is a hard teaching, but it’s key to understanding why family patterns can be so destructive—and why it’s so important to begin getting rid of our baggage and burdens that might affect others.

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In this section, talk about how you will apply the wisdom you’ve learned in this session.

1. In the video Jim said, “Part of leaving a faithful legacy is

examining your life and breaking negative cycles.” What cycles do you need to break?

CREATE A NEW STORY God wants you to be part of His Kingdom—to weave your story into His. That will mean change.

It will require you to go His way rather than your own. This won’t happen overnight, but it should happen steadily. By making small, simple choices, we can begin to change our direction. The Holy Spirit helps us along the way, by giving us gifts to serve the body, offering us insights into Scripture, and challenging us to love not only those around us but those far from God.

2. What are some positive patterns you want to be sure to pass on to others? What are some practical steps you can take to begin creating these new habits?

3.

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How do our habits contribute to our legacy?

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4. Groups grow closer when they serve together. How could

your group serve someone in need? You may want to visit a shut-in from your church, provide a meal for a family who is going through difficulty, or give some other practical help. If nothing comes to mind, spend some group time praying and asking God to show you who needs your help. Then have two or three group members organize a service project for the group, and do it!

5. Developing our ability to serve according to the leading

of the Holy Spirit takes time and persistence in getting to know our Lord. So the first step toward serving others is, paradoxically, spending time alone with God—praying and studying and reflecting on God’s Word. What specific steps will you take this week? If you’ve focused on prayer in past weeks, maybe you’ll want to direct your attention to Scripture this week. If you’ve been reading God’s Word consistently, perhaps you’ll want to take it deeper and try memorizing a verse. Tell the group which one you plan to try this week, and talk about your progress and challenges when you meet next time.

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6. To close your time together, spend some time worship

ping God together—praying, singing, reading Scripture.

• Have someone use their musical gifts to lead the group in a worship song. Try singing a capella, using a worship CD, or have someone accompany your singing with a musical instrument.

• Choose a Psalm or other favorite verse and read it aloud together. Make it a time of praise and worship, as the words remind you of all God has done for you.

• Ask, “How can we pray for you this week?” Invite everyone to share, but don’t force the issue. Be sure to write prayer requests on your Prayer and Praise Report on page 163.

• Close your meeting with prayer.

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Read Hebrews 12:1-3.

DIGGING DEEPER

1. How does being “watched by witnesses” make you feel?

Take some time between now and our next meeting to dig into God’s Word.

Explore the Bible passages related to this session’s theme. Jot down your reflections in a journal or in this study guide.

You may even want to use a Bible website or app to look up commentary on these passages. If you like, share what you learn with the group the next time you meet.

2. What sins have often hindered or entangled you?

3. How would your life change if you began to live for an Audience of One- God?

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DIGGING DEEPER continued

Read Ephesians 4:22-24.

4. What is one thing you’ve been taught by a pastor, by

6. How do our attitudes affect our spiritual growth?

Bible reading, or by a spiritual mentor that you need to incorporate into your life?

5. How can desires deceive us? How do they corrupt us?

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7. What a great thing it is to know we were created to be like God! How does knowing God’s plan for you give you hope in following Him?

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DAILY DEVOTIONALS Day 1 • Read Romans 12:21.

Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Respond:

How can we live out this verse in our daily lives? Ask God for insight and for help in how you can overcome the bad in your life and replace it with good.

Day 3 • Read 1 John 1:9.

If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness.

Respond:

Confessing our sin and then accepting God’s forgiveness is key to breaking negative cycles. Take a few minutes to admit your mistakes to God, and then rest in the knowledge that you are forgiven.

My Action Steps:

My Action Steps:

Day 2 • Read 1 Corinthians 10:13.

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man.

And God is faithful; He will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, He will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

Respond:

Does this verse encourage you or discourage you? How does God provide ways out of our temptations?

Day 4 • Read 1 John 2:17.

The world and its desires pass away, but whoever does the will of God lives forever.

Respond:

What are the desires of the world? How are they different from the will of God?

My Action Steps:

My Action Steps:

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Day 5 • Read James 1:12.

Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love Him.

Respond:

If you are struggling to change negative patterns and receiving resistance from other people, ask God to help you persevere in following Him. Spend a few minutes meditating on this passage and thanking God for the blessings He promises.

My Action Steps:

“THE WORLD AND ITS DESIRES PASS AWAY, BUT WHOEVER DOES THE WILL OF GOD LIVES FOREVER.” 1 John 2:17

Day 6

Use the following space to write any thoughts God has put in your heart and mind about the things we have looked at in this session and during your Daily Devotions time this week.

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Recently researchers at Northwestern University ran a series of experiments that placed college students in tempting situations to smoke, eat junk food, or avoid studying. They found we often display what’s called a “restraint bias,” which means we tend to overestimate how much self-control we will have against temptation. In other words, we’re biased to think we have more restraint than we do. When we’re not in the situation, we think we’ll handle it great, but in the heat of the moment we’ll often give in.

“The righteous who walks in his integrity— blessed are his children after him!” Proverbs 20:7 (ESV)

This isn’t such a big deal if it means we eat a little more pizza than we should or we go to bed a little later than we should. But sometimes we have a restraint bias when it comes to more serious things.

We not only lack willpower, we also lack self-awareness. We think we can easily handle a difficult situation. We assume that our good intentions will stay a reality when things get tough, and we generally overestimate our ability to do the right thing.

We can’t live moral lives and please God through our willpower. If we try, we’ll fail again and again.

But we can please Him when we follow Christ and allow Him to work in us. This week we’ll learn more about what it means to live with integrity—not through our own strength, but through His.

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1.

SHARE YOUR STORY Open your group with prayer. This should be a brief, simple prayer, in which you invite God to be with you as you meet. You can pray for specific requests at the end of the meeting or stop momentarily to pray if a particular situation comes up during your discussion.

As we have said in previous lessons, sharing our personal stories builds deeper connections among group members. Your story may be exactly what another person needs to hear to encourage or strengthen them. And your listening to others’ stories is an act of love and kindness to them—and could very well help them to grow spiritually.

Begin your time together by using the following questions and activities to get people talking.

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When you think of someone with strong integrity who comes to mind? How do they influence you?

2. What character values had a strong emphasis in

your home growing up? (Work ethic, honesty, responsibility, fairness, kindness, generosity, etc.)

3. You may want to sit and share with your spiritual partners prayer concerns.

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Watch the DVD for this session now. Use this space to record key thoughts, questions, and things you want to remember or follow up on. After you finish watching the video, have someone read the discussion questions in the Hear God’s Story section and direct the discussion among the group. As you go through each of the subsequent sections, ask someone else to read the questions and direct the discussion.

WATCH THE DVD

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HEAR GOD’S STORY

Use the following questions to guide your discussion of the teaching from the video and the Bible passage below.

1. What does it mean for values to be “caught” instead of “taught”?

2. In what areas do you currently “own” integrity?

In what ways do you need to work on building integrity?

3. What’s wrong with trying to develop integrity or READ 2 CORINTHIANS 5:21

become a better person by yourself?

“For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God.”

4. What does it mean that Jesus is our savior?

5. What’s God’s part in you growing as a person?

What’s your part?

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STUDY NOTES

Sometimes you’ll come across some “ten dollar words” that theologians and scholars use to describe different aspects of what Jesus did for us on the cross and how His death and resurrection make us right with God. You certainly don’t have to know these words to be a Christian, but the ideas could be helpful to you or the group. Here are a few terms you might want to discuss or study further:

Sanctification: To set apart; to make holy or sacred. We are set apart and made holy when we make the decision to follow Jesus, and we are also sanctified day by day as we follow Him. Imputation: A belief that God “credits” the righteousness of Jesus to us. We are not righteous on our own, but through Jesus.

“JUST AS THE SON OF MAN DID NOT COME TO BE SERVED, BUT TO SERVE, AND TO GIVE HIS LIFE AS A RANSOM FOR MANY.” Matthew 20:28

Propitiation: The idea that Jesus’s death appeases or satisfies God’s wrath toward sin and reconciles us to Him. Redemption: To be freed or rescued from bondage; Jesus’s sacrifice redeemed us from the power of sin.

Justification: God declaring us “just” and sinless because of Christ’s righteousness.

Atonement: Christ presented as the sacrifice that reconciles us to God, by giving His life “as a ransom for many” (Matthew 20:28).

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CREATE A NEW STORY

3. What are the key values you’d like your family or friends

1. What

4. Do you need to do your part and follow the ABC steps

areas of your integrity are strong? Which areas need work?

2. What are some values you have been taught by others?

What are some values you’ve “caught”?

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to learn from you? How can you be more intentional about handing them out?

Jim mentioned in the DVD?

5. Spend some time praying about those you know who

might respond to a simple invitation: to come to a church service, to join your small group, or even just to have coffee and talk about spiritual matters. Ask the Holy Spirit to bring to mind people you can pray for.

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DIGGING DEEPER

Read 1 Peter 2:23-25.

Read 1 John 4:9-12.

1. How did Jesus entrust himself to God on the cross?

1. What does it mean to live through God’s Son?

2. What does it mean to die to sins? To live for righteousness?

2. How does Jesus’ sacrifice atone, or make amends for,

3. How is Jesus a Shepherd to us?

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our sin?

3. How does God’s love live in us when we love each other?

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DAILY DEVOTIONALS Day 1 • Read Isaiah 53:5.

But He was pierced for our transgressions, He was crushed for our iniquities; the punishment that brought us peace was on Him, and by His wounds we are healed.

Day 3 • Read Ephesians 5:1-2.

Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.

Respond:

What does it mean that Jesus was a “fragrant offering”? Ask for His help today to walk in the way of love.

My Action Steps:

Respond:

How does Jesus’ “punishment” bring us peace? How do His physical wounds bring us spiritual healing?

My Action Steps: Day 2 • Read Colossians 1:13-14.

For He has rescued us from the dominion of darkness and brought us into the kingdom of the Son He loves, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.

Respond:

How do you respond to the idea of being rescued? Have you ever considered the idea of needing to be rescued from your sins?

Day 4 • Read Romans 8:1-2.

Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set you free from the law of sin and death.

Respond:

As we try to follow God and live with more integrity, we can take comfort in knowing that God is not angry if we fail. We have the freedom to grow and even to make mistakes because we are in Christ.

My Action Steps:

My Action Steps:

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Day 5 • Read John 15:13.

Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.

Respond:

Take some time today simply to thank Jesus for dying for your sins and to ask for His help in becoming a person of integrity.

My Action Steps:

“...THERE IS NOW NO CONDEMNATION FOR THOSE WHO ARE IN CHRIST JESUS,” Romans 8:1

Day 6

Use the following space to write any thoughts God has put in your heart and mind about the things we have looked at in this session and during your Daily Devotions time this week.

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Have you ever known a really mean Christian? Unfortunately, there are some out there. As we’ve talked about in this study, we are all deeply affected by the attitudes, habits, and values of others, and sometimes these can leave lasting scars that cause a person to hurt deeply—and to hurt others.

“If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.” Romans 12:18

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But as Christ followers, our behavior not only reflects on us, it also reflects on Jesus. Part of loving God is loving other people. Part of becoming like Christ is learning to love like He did. We’ll never get it perfect, but the Bible is full of instructions for how we are to consistently work toward loving, serving, and honoring the people in our lives. Sometimes this is easy, like offering a smile to a stranger. Sometimes it’s more difficult, like offering forgiveness.

But no matter what each day holds, God’s teaching is clear—we need to learn how to play well with others.

Let’s dive in and learn more about what that means.

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1.

Without naming names, who’s the most difficult person in your life?

SHARE YOUR STORY Open your group with prayer. This should be a brief, simple prayer, in which you invite God to be with you as you meet. You can pray for specific requests at the end of the meeting or stop momentarily to pray if a particular situation comes up during your discussion.

Telling our personal stories builds deeper connections among group members. Begin your time together by using the following questions and activities to get people talking. Sharing our stories requires us to be honest. We can help one another to be honest and open by creating a safe place; be sure that your group is one where confidentiality is respected, where there is no such thing as “stupid questions,” where you listen without criticizing one another.

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2.

What’s your “go-to” when you’re angry, stressed, or unhappy? For instance, do you shut down and get quiet, do you yell, do you get sarcastic?

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Watch the DVD for this session now. Use this space to record key thoughts, questions, and things you want to remember or follow up on. After you finish watching the video, have someone read the discussion questions in the Hear God’s Story section and direct the discussion among the group. As you go through each of the subsequent sections, ask someone else to read the questions and direct the discussion.

WATCH THE DVD

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HEAR GOD’S STORY

READ ROMANS 12:9-18.

After viewing the DVD Session, use the following questions to guide your discussion of the teaching from the video and this Bible passage from Romans.

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.

Never be lacking in zeal, but keep your spiritual fervor, serving the Lord.

Be joyful in hope, patient in affliction, faithful in prayer. Share with the Lord’s people who are in need. Practice hospitality.

Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse. Rejoice with those who rejoice; mourn with those who mourn. Live in harmony with one another.

Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.

Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everyone. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

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1. What are some good skills in getting along with

others that you learned from your family? What are some bad habits you learned?

2. What does it mean to love God with our heart?

With our soul? With our mind?

3. When Jesus said to love your neighbor, did he mean

only the person who has a house next to you? Who else is included in that command?

4. What are some ways you need to live in peace with

others? What changes do you need to make for this to happen?

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Researchers and psychologists have come up with a number of tests that can help you learn more about your personality.

These tests are great by themselves, and they’re even more helpful when a group—a family, a team at work, or a church staff—takes them together and learns more about each other.

One is the Enneagram, which identifies nine basic personality types and also explores how they connect with each other, what weaknesses and strengths the personalities have, and what secondary or “wing” type complements and adds to the basic type. You can find out more at enneagraminstitute.com.

Another popular tool is the Myers-Briggs. The creators of this tool and test have noted four major elements of personality and sixteen distinct personality types. These include whether a person is an introvert or extrovert, whether he makes decisions based on feelings, how concrete or intuitive he is, and how much he likes spontaneity. Learn more at myersbriggs.org.

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A third tool is the DISC profile, which identifies Dominance, Influence, Steadiness, and Conscientiousness as four primary ways of interacting with the world. Most people show a clear strength in one of these areas with a secondary strength in a second area. Learn more at discprofile.com.

It’s important to note, when exploring and taking these assessments, that none of these tests define you or others. Everyone is much more than a collection of letters or a test result. But these can be helpful tools that allow you to know yourself better, be more understanding of the people you live and work with, and ultimately get along better with the people you care about.  pla y ing well with others 

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CREATE A NEW STORY

God wants you to be part of His Kingdom—to weave your story into His. That will mean change. It will require you to go His way rather than your own.

This won’t happen overnight, but it should happen steadily. By making small, simple choices, we can begin to change our direction. The Holy Spirit helps us along the way—giving us gifts to serve the body, offering us insights into Scripture, and challenging us to love not only those around us but those far from God.

In this section, talk about how you will apply the wisdom you’ve learned in this session.

1. In what areas of connecting with others would you get a “smiley face” right now? How about a “frowney face”?

2. How does loving God with our heart, soul, and mind help us to love others?

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3.

How does our treatment of others reflect our relationship with God?

4. What should we do if it’s not possible to live in peace with someone because of their choices?

Spend some time praying about those you know who might respond to a simple invitation: to come to a church service; to join your small group; or even just to have coffee and talk about spiritual matters. Ask the Holy Spirit to bring to mind people you can pray for.

• A strong group is made up of people who are all being filled up by God, so that they are empowered to love one another.

What specific steps will you take this week to connect with God privately, so He can “fill you up?” If you’ve focused on prayer in past weeks, maybe you’ll want to direct your attention to Scripture this week. If you’ve been reading God’s Word consistently, perhaps you’ll want to take it deeper and try memorizing a verse. Tell the group which one you plan to try this week. Then, at your next meeting, talk about your progress and challenges.

• To close your time together, spend some time worshiping God together—praying, singing, reading Scripture.

• Have someone use their musical gifts to lead the group in a worship song. Try singing a capella, using a worship CD, or having someone accompany your singing with a musical instrument.

A strong group is made up of people who are all being filled up by God.

• Choose a Psalm or other favorite verse and read it aloud together. Make it a time of praise and worship, as the words remind you of all God has done for you.

• Ask, “How can we pray for you this week?” Invite everyone to share, but don’t force the issue. Be sure to write prayer requests on your Prayer and Praise Report on page 163.

• Close your meeting with prayer.

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Read Hebrews 12:14-15.

1. This passage lists a variety of instructions for how Christians should live. Which ones are most difficult for you?

Which ones are easiest?

DIGGING DEEPER

Explore the Bible passages related to this session’s theme on your own, jotting your reflections in a journal or in this study guide.

You may even want to use a Bible website or app to look up commentary on these passages.

2. How do we bless those who treat us badly or hurt us?

3. Why is it important to rejoice and mourn with those experiencing those emotions?

4. What does it mean to repay evil? Why is it important to avoid this?

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DIGGING DEEPER continued

Read Psalm 133.

1. What does it mean for God’s people to live in unity?

2. What are we to make of the strange comparison in verse 2?

(This might be a great time to check a Bible commentary!)

3. What are some ways God blesses His people when they live this way?

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“It is like precious oil poured on the head, running down on the beard, running down on Aaron’s beard, down on the collar of his robe.” Psalm 133:2

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DAILY DEVOTIONALS Day 1 • Read Romans 14:19.

Let us therefore make every effort to do what leads to peace and to mutual edification.

Respond:

Day 3 • Read Philippians 2:13-14.

Do everything without grumbling or arguing, so that you may become blameless and pure, children of God without fault in a warped and crooked generation.

Respond:

How does our willingness to follow God’s ways—in this case, watching our tongues—testify to those around us?

My Action Steps:

Does treating other people well mean that you must not treat yourself with care? How can we move toward “mutual edification” in our relationships?

My Action Steps:

Day 2 • Read Proverbs 19:11.

A person’s wisdom yields patience; it is to one’s glory to overlook an offense.

Respond:

Again, the point here is not that we become doormats, but that being a loving, wise person means we also don’t make every small problem a major issue. Ask God to help you develop more patience in your relationships and determine which offenses you should overlook.

Day 4 • Read Proverbs 17:14.

Starting a quarrel is like breaching a dam; so drop the matter before a dispute breaks out.

Respond:

Wow, is this true or what?! So often a small argument can become a major fight. Are there things you need to “drop” in order to pursue a more peaceful relationship with someone?

My Action Steps:

My Action Steps:

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Day 5 • Read Matthew 7:5.

You hypocrite, first take the plank out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to remove the speck from your brother’s eye.

Respond:

We are often quick to find fault with others while excusing our own mistakes. What are the “planks” you need to remove?

Ask God to help you identify these issues and work on them.

My Action Steps:

Day 6

Use the following space to write any thoughts God has put in your heart and mind about the things we have looked at in this session and during your Daily Devotions time this week.

“LET US THEREFORE MAKE EVERY EFFORT TO DO WHAT LEADS TO PEACE AND TO MUTUAL EDIFICATION.”

Romans 14:19

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If you need wisdom—if you want to know what God wants you to do—ask him and he will gladly tell you.

He will not resent you asking. James 1:5 (NLT)

Have you ever wished you could just email God, or text Him, and ask for the answer to a specific question? The Bible gives us many, many insights for living meaningful and joyful lives, but it doesn’t give us personal guidance to particular questions. “Who should I marry? Should I marry at all? What kind of work would use my gifts and talents? Where should I live? Should I buy this car or that car? How many children should I have?” If you ask these questions, you won’t find the answer in Scripture.

However, God does make a startling promise to us in the book of James—a promise that if we sincerely ask, He will give us His wisdom. This isn’t as easy as getting a text from God telling you what to do, but it is a direct “hotline” to Him and a way we can make better choices and live in ways that honor Him. This week we’ll explore what it means to seek God’s will and how we can access the gift of His wisdom.

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1.

What surprised you most about this group? Where did God meet you over the last six weeks?

SHARE YOUR STORY Open your group with prayer. This should be a brief, simple prayer, in which you invite God to be with you as you meet. You can pray for specific requests at the end of the meeting, or stop momentarily to pray if a particular situation comes up during your discussion.

As we have said in previous lessons, sharing our personal stories builds deeper connections among group members. Your story may be exactly what another person needs to hear to encourage or strengthen them. And your listening to others’ stories is an act of love and kindness to them— and could very well help them grow spiritually.

Begin your time together by using the following questions and activities to get people talking.

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2.

3.

You can have one wish—what would it be?

(No wishing for more wishes!)

Can you think of a public figure or a celebrity who was blessed with many advantages but destroyed their life? What bad choices caused their downfall?

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Watch the DVD for this session now. Use this space to record key thoughts, questions, and things you want to remember or follow up on. After you finish watching the video, have someone read the discussion questions in the Hear God’s Story section and direct the discussion among the group. As you go through each of the subsequent sections, ask someone else to read the questions and direct the discussion.

WATCH THE DVD

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HEAR GOD’S STORY

After viewing the DVD Session, use the following questions to guide your discussion of the teaching you just experienced in the video, and this Bible passage from James.

1. We can’t ask God for wisdom if we don’t think we

need it. Take a few minutes to evaluate your life. In what areas do you need God’s wisdom and help?

2. Solomon asked God for the ability to tell the dif-

ference between right and wrong. What makes that such an important part of wisdom?

3. How can wealth and success make us vulnerable?

4. Jim said Solomon was “educated beyond his obeREAD JAMES 1:2-5.

“Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything. If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.”

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dience.” He knew what to do, but he didn’t do it.

In what ways does this describe our life? Are there areas in which you are not doing what you know you should do?

5. Solomon’s final conclusion in life is to love God and obey Him. How would your life change if you made this the goal of your life?

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STUDY NOTES For more teaching on wisdom, check out the book of Proverbs. You may already be familiar with this book or know it as a collection of short sayings that offer wisdom and instruction for life. These sayings are definitely valuable, and often you will find yourself nodding your head in agreement as you read some that especially resonate with you (or wishing you could anonymously email a few to other people!).

But in addition to the individual adages, the first nine chapters of Proverbs offer an extended discussion of why wisdom is so important, the contrast between the way of wisdom and the way of violence, the consequences of rejecting wisdom, and the many benefits of accepting wisdom.

Our text for this week is true—God will give you His wisdom if you ask. But a great way to get His wisdom is through His word, and Proverbs is a perfect place to start.

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“Listen, my son, to your father’s instruction and do not forsake your mother’s teaching. They are a garland to grace your head and a chain to adorn your neck.”

Proverbs 1:8-9

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Think about specific steps you want to take to live a new story and to walk more closely with God so you can be part of His story, engaged in His kingdom.

1. How has God changed your story during this six-

week study? What new things is He asking you to do? What truth has transformed your heart?

CREATE A NEW STORY

2. As

you walk forward in your relationship with God, what will you do differently as a result of what you’ve experienced in this group?

3. Jim and Jen shared the story of King Solomon,

who followed God for a while and experienced great blessings before he began depending on himself instead. In what areas are you relying on your own wisdom instead of God’s?

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4. What’s the difference between knowing God’s command-

ments and following them? Which is easier? Which pleases God more?

5. In Romans 7 Paul writes that he is exhausted with him-

self. He says, “I don’t understand myself at all, for I really want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead I do the very thing I hate. I know perfectly well that what I am doing is wrong . . . but I can’t help myself.” Do you have an area of your life that continues to trip you up?

6. In what one area of your life do you most want wisdom and guidance?

7. As this is the last meeting in this study, take some time to celebrate the work God has done in the lives of group members. Have each person in the group share some step of growth they have noticed in another member. (In other words, no one will talk about themselves. Instead, affirm others in the group.) Make sure each person gets affirmed and noticed and celebrated—whether the steps they’ve made are large or small.

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8. Review your Small Group Agreement on page 156 and

evaluate how well you met your goals. Discuss any changes you want to make as you move forward. If you plan to continue meeting, and your group starts a new study, this is a great time to take on a new role or change roles of service in your group. What new role will you take on?

If you are uncertain, maybe your group members have some ideas for you. Remember, you aren’t making a lifetime commitment to the new role; it will only be for a few weeks. Maybe someone would like to share a role with you if you don’t feel ready to serve solo.

9. Close by praying for your prayer requests and take a cou-

ple of minutes to review the praises you have recorded over the past five weeks on the Prayer and Praise Report on page 163. Spend some time just worshipping God and thanking Him for all He’s done in your group during this study.

If your group still needs to make decisions about continuing to meet after this session, have that discussion now. Talk about what you will study, who will lead, and where and when you will meet.

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DIGGING DEEPER

Explore the Bible passages related to this session’s theme on your own, jotting your reflections in a journal or in this study guide.

You may even want to use a Bible website or app to look up commentary on these passages.

Read Psalm 119:97-105.

1. What is the “law” referred to in this passage? Why is it so important to the psalmist?

2. What action seems necessary to fully understand the wisdom of God’s word? (see verses 97, 99)

3. What is required in addition to knowledge if we are going to gain understanding? (see verses 100, 101)

4. Why does the author compare God’s word to a light or a lamp?

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DIGGING DEEPER continued

Read James 1:5-8.

1. As you think of the legacy you’d like to pass on, what

2. How can we as individuals, a church, and a country seek wisdom?

role does wisdom play in achieving that goal?

3. It’s interesting that James, Jesus’ brother, writes this. Yet, James did not recognize Jesus as his Lord at first. How have you “missed” Jesus in the past?

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DAILY DEVOTIONALS Day 1 • Read Thessalonians 5:16-18.

Day 3 • Read 1 Peter 2:15-16.

For it is God’s will that by doing good you should silence the ignorant talk of foolish people. Live as free people, but do not use your freedom as a cover-up for evil; live as God’s slaves.

Respond:

Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.

How does doing good “silence” those who are opposed to God? Is there a situation in your life that would be improved by following God and submitting to His will?

Respond:

My Action Steps:

Sometimes we ignore the general will of God in our desire for specific insights. Are you rejoicing, praying, and giving thanks?

My Action Steps:

Day 2 • Read James 3:17.

But the wisdom that comes from heaven is first of all pure; then peace-loving, considerate, submissive, full of mercy and good fruit, impartial and sincere.

Respond:

Do any of these descriptions of wisdom surprise you? Have you seen examples of this from times God has given you wisdom in your own life?

Day 4 • Read Ecclesiastes 2:26.

To the person who pleases Him, God gives wisdom, knowledge and happiness, but to the sinner He gives the task of gathering and storing up wealth to hand it over to the one who pleases God.

Respond:

What a promise! Take some time today to ask God for help in pleasing Him so that you can experience His blessings.

My Action Steps:

My Action Steps:

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Day 5 • Read Ephesians 5:15-17.

Be very careful, then, how you live—not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity, because the days are evil. Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is.

Respond:

What does it mean to wisely make the most of every opportunity? Why is this so important in our sinful world?

My Action Steps:

Day 6

Use the following space to write any thoughts God has put in your heart and mind about the things we have looked at in this session and during your Daily Devotions time this week.

“REJOICE ALWAYS, PRAY CONTINUALLY, GIVE THANKS IN ALL CIRCUMSTANCES; FOR THIS IS GOD’S WILL FOR YOU IN CHRIST JESUS.” Thessalonians 5:16-18

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APPENDICES RESOURCES TO MAKE YOUR SMALL GROUP EXPERIENCE EVEN BETTER!

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FREQUENTLY ASKED QUESTIONS What do we do on the first night of our group?

Like all fun things in life—have a party! A “get to know you” coffee, dinner, or dessert is a great way to launch a new study. You may want to review the Group Agreement (page 156) and share the names of a few friends you can invite to join you. But most importantly, have fun before your study time begins.

Where do we find new members for our group?

This can be troubling, especially for new groups that have only a few people or for existing groups that lose a few people along the way. We encourage you to pray with your group and then brainstorm a list of people from work, church, your neighborhood, your children’s school, family, the gym, and so forth. Then have each group member invite several of the people on his or her list. Another good strategy is to ask church leaders to make an announcement or allow a bulletin insert.

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How long will this group meet?

Most groups meet weekly for at least their first 5 weeks.

At the end of this study, each group member may decide if he or she wants to continue on for another study. Some groups launch relationships for years to come, and others are stepping-stones into another group experience. Either way, enjoy the journey.

Can we do this study on our own?

Absolutely! This may sound crazy, but one of the best ways to do this study is not with a full house but with a few friends. You may choose to gather with another couple who would enjoy some relational time (perhaps going to the movies or having a quiet dinner) and then walking through this study. Jesus will be with you even if there are only two of you (Matthew 18:20).

No matter how you find members, it’s vital that you stay on the lookout for new people to join your group. All groups tend to go through healthy attrition—the result of moves, releasing new leaders, ministry opportunities, and so forth—and if the group gets too small, it could be at risk of shutting down. If you and your group stay open, you’ll be amazed at the people God sends your way. The next person just might become a friend for life.

You never know!

What if this group is not working for us?

You’re not alone! This could be the result of a personality conflict, life stage difference, geographical distance, level of spiritual maturity, or any number of things. Relax. Pray for God’s direction, and at the end of this 5-week study, decide whether to continue with this group or find another. You don’t typically buy the first car you look at or marry the first person you date, and the same goes with a group. However, don’t bail out before the 5 weeks are up—God might have something to teach you.

Also, don’t run from conflict or prejudge people before you have given them a chance. God is still working in your life, too!

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Who is the leader?

Ideally, the group will mature and members will rotate the leadership of meetings. We have discovered that healthy groups rotate hosts/leaders and homes on a regular basis. This model ensures that all members grow, give their unique contribution, and develop their gifts. This study guide and the Holy Spirit can keep things on track even when you rotate leaders. Christ has promised to be in your midst as you gather. Ultimately, God is your leader each step of the way.

How do we handle the childcare needs in our group?

Very carefully. Seriously, this can be a sensitive issue. We suggest that you empower the group to openly brainstorm solutions. You may try one option that works for a while and then adjust over time. Our favorite approach is for adults to meet in the living room or dining room and to share the cost of a babysitter (or two) who can watch the kids in a different part of the house. This way, parents don’t have to be away from their children all evening when their children are too young to be left at home. A second option is to use one home for the kids and a second home (close by or a phone call away) for the adults. A third idea is to rotate the responsibility of providing a lesson or care for the children either in the same home or in another home nearby. This can be an incredible blessing for kids. Finally, the most common solution is to decide that you need to have a night to invest in your spiritual lives individually or as a couple and to make your own arrangements for childcare. No matter what decision the group makes, the best approach is to dialogue openly about both the problem and the solution.

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On the first night of your group, like all fun things in life— have a party!

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SMALL GROUP AGREEMENT

OUR EXPECTATIONS

OUR PURPOSE To provide a predictable environment where participants experience authentic community and spiritual growth.

• Refreshments/mealtimes

OUR VALUES • Group Attendance To give priority to the group meeting. We will call or email if we will be late or absent. (Completing the Group Calendar on page 158 will minimize this issue.)

•

Safe Environment To help create a safe place where people can be heard and feel loved.

(Please, no quick answers, snap judgments, or simple fixes.)

•

Respect Differences To be gentle and gracious to people with different spiritual maturity, personal opinions, temperaments, or “imperfections” in fellow group members. We are all works in progress.

• Confidentiality To keep anything that is shared strictly confidential and within the group, and to avoid sharing improper information about those outside the group.

•

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Encouragement for Growth To be not just takers but givers of life. We want to spiritually multiply our life by serving others with our God-given gifts.

•

Shared Ownership To remember that every member is a minister and to ensure that each attender will share a small team role or responsibility over time.

•

Rotating Hosts/Leaders and Homes To encourage different people to host the group in their homes and to rotate the responsibility of facilitating each meeting. (See the Group Calendar on page 158.)

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• Childcare •

When we will meet (day of week)

•

Where we will meet (place)

•

We will begin at

•

We will do our best to have some or all of us attend a worship

service together. Our primary worship service time will be

•

Date of this agreement

•

Date we will review this agreement again

•

Who (other than the leader) will review this agreement at the end

of this study

(time) and end at

• Notes

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GROUP CALENDAR

Planning and calendaring can help ensure the greatest participation at every meeting. At the end of each meeting, review this calendar. Be sure to include a regular rotation of host homes and leaders, and don’t forget birthdays, socials, church events, holidays, and mission/ministry projects.

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SPIRITUAL PARTNERS’ CHECK-IN

Briefly check in each week and write down your personal plans and progress targets for the next week (or even for the next few weeks). This could be done before or after the meeting, on the phone, through an e-mail message, or even in person from time to time.

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SMALL GROUP ROSTER

MEMORY VERSE CARDS CLIP AND REVIEW SESSION ONE We will not hide these truths from our children but will tell the next generation about the glorious deeds of the Lord.

Psalm 78:4a (NLT)

PHONE EMAIL

SESSION TWO Take the time and trouble to keep yourself spiritually fit.

I Timothy 4:7 (Ph) SESSION THREE Let us examine our ways and test them, and return to the Lord.

Lamentations 3:40 SESSION FOUR The righteous who walks in His integrity—blessed are his children after him!

Proverbs 20:7 (ESV)

NAME

SESSION FIVE If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.

Romans 12:18

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SESSION SIX If you need wisdom—if you want to know what God wants you to do—ask Him and He will gladly tell you. He will not resent you asking. James 1:5 (NLT) HAND-ME-DOWNS

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PRAYER AND PRAISE REPORT

Clip and review the memory verses on the other side of this page.

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HOSTING AN OPEN HOUSE If you’re starting a new group, try planning an “open house” before your first formal group meeting. Even if you have only two to four core members, it’s a great way to break the ice and to consider prayerfully who else might be open to joining you over the next few weeks. You can also use this kick-off meeting to hand out study guides, spend some time getting to know each other, discuss each person’s expectations for the group and briefly pray for each other. A simple meal or good desserts always make a kick-off meeting more fun.

SMALL GROUP LEADERS KEY RESOURCES TO HELP YOUR LEADERSHIP EXPERIENCE BE THE BEST IT CAN BE.

After people introduce themselves and share how they ended up being at the meeting (you can play a game to see who has the wildest story!), have everyone respond to a few icebreaker questions: • What is your favorite family vacation?

• What is one thing you love about your church/our community?

• What are three things about your life growing up that most people here don’t know?

Next, ask everyone to tell what he or she hopes to get out of the study.

You might want to review the Small Group Agreement and talk about each person’s expectations and priorities.

Finally, set an open chair (maybe two) in the center of your group and explain that it represents someone who would enjoy or benefit from this group but who isn’t here yet. Ask people to pray about inviting someone to join the group over the next few weeks. Hand out postcards and have everyone write an invitation or two. Don’t worry about ending up with too many people; you can always have one discussion circle in the living room and another in the dining room after you watch the lesson. Each group could then report prayer requests and progress at the end of the session.

You can skip this kick-off meeting if your time is limited, but you’ll experience a huge benefit if you take the time to connect with each other in this way.

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LEADING FOR THE FIRST TIME • Sweaty palms are a healthy sign. The Bible says God is gracious to the humble. Remember who is in control; the time to worry is when you’re not worried. Those who are soft in heart (and sweaty palmed) are those whom God is sure to speak through.

• Seek support. Ask your leader, co-leader, or close friend to pray for you and prepare with you before the session. Walking through the study will help you anticipate potentially difficult questions and discussion topics.

• Bring your uniqueness to the study. Lean into who you are and how God wants you to uniquely lead the study.

• Prepare. Prepare. Prepare. Go through the session several times. If you are using the DVD, listen to the teaching segment and Leadership Lifter. Consider writing in a journal or fasting for a day to prepare yourself for what God wants to do. Don’t wait until the last minute to prepare.

• Ask for feedback so you can grow. Perhaps in an email or on cards handed out at the study, have everyone write down three things you did well and one thing you could improve on. Don’t get defensive. Instead, show an openness to learn and grow.

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• Prayerfully consider launching a new group. This doesn’t need to happen overnight, but God’s heart is for this to take place over time. Not all Christians are called to be leaders or teachers, but we are all called to be “shepherds” of a few someday.

• Use online resources. Visit lifetogether.com and listen to Brett Eastman share the weekly Leadership Lifter and download any additional notes or ideas for your session. You may also want to subscribe to the Doing Life Together newsletter and LLT Newsletter. Both can be obtained for free by signing up at lifetogether.com/subscribe.

• Share with your group what God is doing in your heart. God is searching for those whose hearts are fully His. Share your trials and victories. We promise that people will relate.

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• Prayerfully consider whom you would like to pass the baton to next week. It’s only fair. God is ready for the next member of your group to go on the faith journey you just traveled. Make it fun, and expect God to do the rest.

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LEADERSHIP TRAINING 101 Congratulations! You have responded to the call to help shepherd Jesus’ flock.

There are few other tasks in the family of God that surpass the contribution you will be making. As you prepare to lead, whether it is one session or the entire series, here are a few thoughts to keep in mind. We encourage you to read these and review them with each new discussion leader before he or she leads.

1. Remember that you are not alone. God knows

everything about you, and He knew that you would be asked to lead your group. Remember that it is common for all good leaders to feel that they are not ready to lead. Moses, Solomon, Jeremiah and Timothy were all reluctant to lead.

God promises, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you” (Hebrews 13:5). Whether you are leading for one evening, for several weeks, or for a lifetime, you will be blessed as you serve.

2. Don’t try to do it alone. Pray right now for God

to help you build a healthy leadership team. If you can enlist a co-leader to help you lead the group, you will find your experience to be much richer. This is your chance to involve as many people as you can in building a healthy group.

All you have to do is call and ask people to help.

You’ll probably be surprised at the response.

3. Just be yourself. If you won’t be you, who will?

God wants you to use your unique gifts and temperament. Don’t try to do things exactly like another leader; do them in a way that fits you! Just admit it when you don’t have an answer, and apologize when you make a mistake.

Your group will love you for it, and you’ll sleep better at night!

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4. Prepare for your meeting ahead of time. Review the session

and the leader’s notes, and write down your responses to each question. Pay special attention to exercises that ask group members to do something other than engage in discussion.

These exercises will help your group live what the Bible teaches, not just talk about it. Be sure you understand how an exercise works, and bring any necessary supplies (such as paper and pens) to your meeting. If the exercise employs one of the items in the appendix, be sure to look over that item so you’ll know how it works. Finally, review “Outline for Each Session” so you’ll remember the purpose of each section in the study.

5. Pray for your group members by name. Before you begin your session, go around the room in your mind and pray for each member by name. You may want to review the prayer list at least once a week. Ask God to use your time together to touch the heart of every person uniquely. Expect God to lead you to whomever He wants you to encourage or challenge in a special way. If you listen, God will surely lead!

6. When you ask a question, be patient. Someone will eventu-

ally respond. Sometimes people need a moment or two of silence to think about the question. Keep in mind, if silence doesn’t bother you, it won’t bother anyone else. After someone responds, affirm the response with a simple “thanks” or “good job.” Then ask, “How about somebody else?” or “Would someone who hasn’t shared like to add anything?” Be sensitive to new people or reluctant members who aren’t ready to say, pray or do anything. If you give them a safe setting, they will blossom over time.

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7. Provide transitions between questions. When guiding the dis-

cussion, always read aloud the transitional paragraphs and the questions. Ask the group if anyone would like to read the paragraph or Bible passage. Don’t call on anyone, but ask for a volunteer, and then be patient until someone begins. Be sure to thank the person who reads aloud.

8. Break up into small groups each week or they won’t stay. If your

group has more than seven people, we strongly encourage you to have the group gather sometimes in discussion circles of three or four people during the Hear God’s Story section of the study. With a greater opportunity to talk in a small circle, people will connect more with the study, apply more quickly what they’re learning and ultimately get more out of it. A small circle also encourages a quiet person to participate and tends to minimize the effects of a more vocal or dominant member.

It can also help people feel more loved in your group. When you gather again at the end of the section, you can have one person summarize the highlights from each circle. Small circles are also helpful during prayer time. People who are unaccustomed to praying aloud will feel more comfortable trying it with just two or three others. Also, prayer requests won’t take as much time, so circles will have more time to actually pray.

When you gather back with the whole group, you can have one person from each circle briefly update everyone on the prayer requests. People are more willing to pray in small circles if they know that the whole group will hear all the prayer requests.

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9. Rotate facilitators weekly. At the end of each meeting, ask the group who should lead the following week. Let the group help select your weekly facilitator. You may be perfectly capable of leading each time, but you will help others grow in their faith and gifts if you give them opportunities to lead. You can use the Small Group Calendar to fill in the names of all meeting leaders at once if you prefer.

One final challenge for new or first-time leaders:

Before your first opportunity to lead, look up each of the five passages listed below.

Read each one as a devotional exercise to help yourself develop a shepherd’s heart.

Trust us on this one. If you do this, you will be more than ready for your first meeting.

Matthew 9:36 1 Peter 5:2-4 Psalm 23 Ezekiel 34:11-16 1 Thessalonians 2:7-8, 11-12

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In June of 2000, Jim and Jennifer Cowart, along with their young children Alyssa and Josh, were sent by the United Methodist Church to plant a new church in Middle Georgia.

With no congregation, building, or land, the Cowart’s began Harvest Church as just an idea from God. That idea has now grown into over 2900 people each weekend.

ABOUT THE AUTHORS JIM & JENNIFER COWART

From small beginnings in a band room, through five years in a movie theater, to a beautiful 43-acre campus on the outskirts of Warner Robins, Harvest Church has seen more than 2800 people accept Jesus as Savior. (In fact, Outreach Magazine included Harvest in their “Top 100 Fastest Growing Churches in America” for 2009, 2010 and 2014.)

The Cowart’s take the phrase “every member in ministry” seriously as they encourage every attender to do three things weekly: serve on a ministry team, attend worship, and join a community group.

Harvest Church has seen more than 2800 people accept Jesus as Savior.

Jim is a visionary evangelist and serves at Harvest as Lead and Founding Pastor. Jen is the Executive Pastor and excels in developing systems of ministry and leadership. Their deep commitment to living out the Great Commandment and Great Commission led them to write their first book, “Start This, Stop That,” which was released in 2013. Jim and Jen approach ministry the way they approach life—with a deep commitment to Christ, each other, and joy in the journey.

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WORSHIP SONGS ALIVE

IT IS WELL

I was lost with a broken heart You picked me up, now I’m set apart From the ash I am born again Forever safe in the Savior’s hands You are more than my words could say I’ll follow You Lord for all my days I’ll fix my eyes, follow in Your ways Forever free in unending grace

Grander earth has quaked before Moved by the sound of His voice Seas that are shaken and stirred Can be calmed and broken for my regard

(King, Pappas)

(Bethel)

‘Cause You are, You are, You are my freedom We lift You higher, lift You higher Your love, Your love, Your love never ending Oh oh oh You are alive in us Nothing can take Your place You are all we need Your love has set us free In the midst of the darkest night Let Your love be the shining light Breaking chains that were holding me You sent Your Son down and set me free Everything of this world will fade I’m pressing on till I see Your face I will live that Your will be done I won’t stop till Your Kingdom come

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Through it all, through it all My eyes are on You Through it all, through it all It is well Through it all, through it all My eyes are on You It is well with me Far be it from me to not believe Even when my eyes can’t see And this mountain that’s in front of me Will be thrown into the midst of the sea So let go my soul and trust in Him The waves and wind still know His name It is well with my soul It is well with my soul It is well with my soul It is well with my soul

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OPEN UP THE HEAVENS

(Macdonald, Ingram, Garrard, Rozier, Andrews) We’ve waited for this day We’re gathered in your name Calling out to you Your glory like a fire Awakening desire Will burn our hearts with truth You’re the reason we’re here You’re the reason we’re singing Open up the heavens We want to see you Open up the floodgates A mighty river Flowing from your heart Filling every part of our praise Your presence in this place Your glory on our face We’re looking to the sky Descending like a cloud You’re standing with us now Lord, unveil our eyes Show us, show us your glory Show us, show us your power Show us, show us your glory, Lord

RUN

(Houston) You were God from the outset Powerful and creative You who saw us here before You called All the stars and the earth to existence You are God, You are holy History is Your story You who was and is and who forever will be God we live for Your glory So we will run All together our hearts aflame With a fire that can’t be tamed Our God, all glory to Your name Jesus You are God, You are freedom You’re alive now within us You who saw us here before You conquered the grave And delivered on the promise We will run Our surrender to bring You fame Our desire that You be praised Our God, all glory to Your name Jesus We give you praise Oh Lord, so great is Your name You’re worthy of all our praise We will run Our surrender to bring You fame Our desire that You be praised Our God, all glory to Your name Jesus, Jesus

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THE ROCK WON’T MOVE (Miller, Sooter, Fredricks, MacDonald)

When the ground beneath my feet gives way And I hear the sound of crashing waves All my world is washing out to sea.

I’m hidden safe in the God who never moves Holding fast to the promise of Your truth You are holding tighter still to me.

YOU CAME TO MY RESCUE (Nockels, Weeks, Pike, Mhondera, Carson, Younker Tomlin)

Salvation, my freedom You gave Your all for me Forever You made a way for me

And You came to my rescue You came to my rescue Calling on Your name Calling on Your name Love came down

My hope is in the promise of Your blood My support within the raging flood Even in the tempest, I can sing

You’re the light in the darkest night You lead me through the storm and fire When all around my hope gives way You’re my rock

Whoa, whoa, whoa The Rock of our salvation

You taught me how to sing Your song You’ve overwhelmed me with Your love You set my feet to dancing now You’re my God

And when darkness seems to hide His face I rest on His unchanging grace.

The Rock won’t move No, the Rock won’t move

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Freedom is a song I sing I can’t contain the joy You bring All because of Your great love Now I live I was dead, but now I breathe Awaken to Your grace so free In the power of Your cross Now I live

Oh, the Rock won’t move and His word is strong The Rock won’t move and His love can’t be undone The Rock of our salvation

On Christ the solid rock I stand All other ground is sinking sand The Rock won’t move

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NOTES

“WE WILL NOT HIDE THESE TRUTHS FROM OUR CHILDREN BUT WILL TELL THE NEXT GENERATION ABOUT THE GLORIOUS DEEDS OF THE LORD.”

Psalm 78:4a (NLT)

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NOTES

“TAKE THE TIME AND TROUBLE TO KEEP YOURSELF SPIRITUALLY FIT.”

I Timothy 4:7 (Ph)

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NOTES

“LET US EXAMINE OUR WAYS AND TEST THEM, AND RETURN TO THE LORD.”

Lamentations 3:40

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NOTES

“THE RIGHTEOUS WHO WALKS IN HIS INTEGRITY—BLESSED ARE HIS CHILDREN AFTER HIM!

Proverbs 20:7 (ESV)

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NOTES

IF IT IS POSSIBLE, AS FAR AS IT DEPENDS ON YOU, LIVE AT PEACE WITH EVERYONE.

Romans 12:18

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“IF YOU NEED WISDOM—IF YOU WANT TO KNOW WHAT GOD WANTS YOU TO DO—ASK HIM AND HE WILL GLADLY TELL YOU. HE WILL NOT RESENT YOU ASKING.” James 1:5 (NLT)

DON’T STOP NOW! KEEP DIGGING INTO GOD’S WORD. THESE STUDIES ARE AVAILABLE FROM JIM AND JEN COWART.

www.harvestchurch4u.org www.jimandjennifercowart.org

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COMING SOON! WORSHIP DVD AND BOOK