Life on Capitol Hill — September 2015

Page 22

22

Life on Capitol Hill• SEPTEMBER 2015

CURMUDGEON Continued from page 19 and Spa. Calvin stayed at the Motel 6 on Federal Boulevard instead. 35. Denver has the largest city park system in the nation, with 14,000 acres of mountain parks and 2,500 acres of natural areas. With that much ground you would think that the Denver Parks and Recreation Department could find a place for a full-sized Dog Park in central Denver after they build the new recreation center, where the “World’s Most Expensive Dog Park” currently resides. 36. Elvis Presley once flew in his private jet from Memphis to Denver’s Stapleton Airport just for a sandwich. He ordered 22 Fool’s Gold Loafs, a sandwich containing a jar of peanut butter, a jar of grape jelly and one pound of bacon, from the Colorado Gold Mine Company Steakhouse for him and his friends. They dined on the sandwiches with champagne and then returned home. No surprise that

he died when he was 42 (on my birthday by the way). 37. Half the food produced in the world is left to rot. No witty response to this one, I am too busy wiping a tear from my face. 38. Bob Dylan lived at 1336 East 17th Ave. in Denver for a short amount of time in the 60s, while doing a series of gigs at the Satire Lounge. 39. And the bathrooms at the Satire haven’t been cleaned since then. 40. A single male produces enough sperm in two weeks to impregnate every fertile woman on the planet. And I know a couple of guys that are trying to prove this to be true. 41. The population in Denver has more than doubled since 1960. You know this to be true if you have ever driven home from the mountains on I-70 on a Sunday afternoon. 42. Cockroaches appeared 120 million years before the dinosaurs. And they will still be here long after us humans blow each other up. FIBS: 5, 11, 13, 15, 20, 25, 30, 32, 39

RARE GIANT CORPSE FLOWER raised quite a stink as it bloomed recently (it took almost 20 yrs.) at The Denver Botanical Gardens BEFORE BLOOM PHOTO BY DANI SHAE THOMPSON, AFTER BLOOM PHOTO COURTESY OF SCOTT DRESSEL-MARTIN AND DENVER BOTANIC GARDENS

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