Penile Size Chart Queen by later247snorru

Penis Enlargement Bible

The eBook is supplied for information purposes only, even though the contributors of this material are well conversed in the subject matter printed. The material content in this ebook does not constitute professional advice. This eBook is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information with regards to the subject matter contained. It is sold on the understanding that the publisher and its contributors are not engaged in rendering legal, accounting, or other professional advice. If professional advice or other professional assistance is required, the services of a competent professional should be sought. The readers are advised to consult with any appropriately qualified professional before taking any decisions. If you have or suspect an illness or have a health concern, always consult with your physician or health care provider. We have used our best judgment in compiling this information, however, the information presented may not have been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. Any reference to a specific product is for your information only and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Table of Contents Introduction .......................................................................................................................... 4 Know Your Penis ................................................................................................................... 6 Measuring Your Penis ............................................................................................................ 8 Penis Exercises: The Basics................................................................................................... 10 Penis Exercises: Stepping It Up A Gear (Advanced Exercises) ................................................ 16 Penis Exercises: The Schedule .............................................................................................. 20 Conclusion........................................................................................................................... 24

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Introduction

First of all, congratulations on your choice to download this ebook. This ebook may be free, but I can assure you it‟s priceless. Soon you will know exactly how to enlarge your penis! So consider yourself lucky, my friend, because normally you have to pay $49 just to read guides that are less good than this one. This is a real treat indeed. Now let‟s talk about penis. Your penis, to be exact. I„d bet that your woman has not said in your presence that a bigger penis feels much better during sex than a small penis. It‟s no surprise because she doesn't want to hurt your feelings. Copyright © PenisEnlargementBible.com. All rights reserved.

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Penis Enlargement Bible You see, one of the top complaints from women about their sex life is their partner's small penis size. So what can you do now to make sure your penis causes compliments, not complaints? Don‟t worry, I‟m here to help. If you want to know how to enlarge your penis, then doing exercises is one of most popular ways to increase the size of a man's penis. Nonetheless, there is some effort required - and a catch! By doing some penis enlargement exercises, you can train your penis to let more blood into it which will give you a harder erection and assist in penis growth if you follow the other necessary steps to cause big growth. (This is what the exercise "gurus" didn't want you to know!) But of course, exercises alone DON'T work. In the same way that your body does, your penis needs nutrients and biochemicals to repair itself and - more importantly for us - to grow. What's more, you can trick your body into restarting puberty style penis enlargement (i.e. natural growth) with biochemicals that were present in your body during puberty, but which left when it ended! When they left your body, penis growth ground to a sudden halt. A cool video all about biochemicals and their function in penis enlargement can be found at www.PenisEnlargementBible.com. However, right now you can read this amazing free penis exercise ebook and start straight away to improve your sex life. What I can say is that this guide has been changing the way a bucket-load of men think about treating their "size" problem. Within a few minutes, you will learn how to become a much better lover with a bigger penis. Now enjoy this free report and please pass it on to your family and friends. Tell them about PenisEnlargementBible.com. They need your help too. :) Let's get started!

John Collins, PenisEnlargementBible.com

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Know Your Penis

I'm not going to waste this space (and your valuable time) by telling you all about your penis. You know what a penis is already, right?! :) But there is some important stuff that you need to know if you want to make your penis bigger... As you know, the penis is not a muscle. It's also not a bone. Instead, it's made up of delicate spongy tissue which grew because biochemicals in your body made it bigger as you went through puberty. The most important thing you've gotta remember is that the penis isn't a muscle that can be exercised in the conventional way. BUT... You can use exercises to accelerate penis growth. And this free guide is all about those exercises which are most effective at accelerating the growth of your penis.

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Penis Enlargement Bible Unlike muscle, your penis consists of three cylinders or tubes of tissue. These are arranged with two cylinders on top (as you look down on the penis) and one on the bottom. They are each roughly the size and shape of a pencil. Running through the bottom cylinder is the urethra, the tube through which urine and sperm pass. These cylinders of tissue are firmly held together by a wrap of tissue called Buck„s fascia. If you want to make your penis bigger then you have to enlarge these 3 cylinders and the Buck's fascia. Here's a diagram of the male sexual organs:

Our objective is to make the shaft of your penis bigger in length and girth from the base all the way to the tip. When we do that you get a bigger penis. Penis exercises, unlike muscle exercises, are focused on trapping blood in the penis for longer than is natural. When I implemented my method of penis growth, this accelerated results and took me from a lowly 5” to a big 8”. This guide is focused on getting you gains that are between 2 and 4 inches personally. Before we look at the exercises themselves let's talk about measuring your penis...

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Measuring Your Penis

The truth is, the majority of men have no idea how to measure penis length accurately. To accurately measure your penis is vital if you want to record the increases in size. Here are the steps to measure your penis size accurately so you can give yourself an honest measurement about how you jack up to the male average of six inchesâ&#x20AC;Ś FIRST.... find a measuring device. A cloth measuring tape works best. IF you can't find one - then a piece of string will do. After measuring yourself with a piece of string you can place that string along a wooden ruler or some other measuring device! (I hope that makes sense)

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Penis Enlargement Bible IF your penis 'curves' or 'bends' [and many penises do!!] be sure to measure along the curve or bend. Don't measure STRAIGHT from your pubic bone to the tip of your penis in other words! Now the fun part... GET ERECT! Take your measuring device and measure your penis from your pubic bone (the 'pubic bone' is the bone you feel when you press in the area that is covered by your pubic hairs). Don't press TOO hard - but hard enough to be firmly against that bone. Now hold your penis - if you have to! - and place the measuring device (whatever it is that your using) along the top of your penis. (Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x17E;s the part of your penis that YOU see!) You are measuring from the pubic bone along the TOP of the penis to the tip of your penis. THAT measurement [whether in inches, centimeters or millimeters] is your OFFICIAL length. The reason I suggest measuring FROM the pubic bone is because it puts every guy on a level playing field. It's a way of being more accurate. Some heavier guys have extra fat behind their pubic hairs - making the penis APPEAR smaller. But we're going for the scientific method to measure your actual size. If you are using a piece of string or whatever, find the distance from your pubic bone to the tip of your penis and then measure the piece of string. To measure the thickness or 'girth' or your penis - stay erect and find the thickest part of your penis (along the shaft). Take your measuring device and wrap it around your penis to get your actual girth measurement. Take note of how many inches, centimeters or millimeters it takes to go all the way around. That measurement will be the official girth of your penis. That's it. That's all there is to it. Now, onto the basics of exercises... J

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Penis Exercises: The Basics

Penis exercises are a way of trapping blood in the penis. While some people sell systems on penis exercises this guide is free. And it's free because I'm not going to lie to you about penis exercises. I'm not here to make a quick buck. I was once where you are – trying to get a bigger penis – and I was scammed countless times. Here is what “gurus” who rip you off with exercise programs will tell you: o “Penis exercises are a great way to make your penis bigger. They're all you need to grow by 2-6 inches!!!”

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Penis Enlargement Bible o “Buy my stuff!!!” o “Exercises work because the enlarge the blood vessels in the penis and then your penis can accommodate more blood. That means you get a bigger penis!!!” I gotta tell you right now though. That's total BS! What you need is the two-step biochemical method to penis enlargement. One of these steps is exercises. So here's what you need to know about exercises. This is basic exercises, advanced exercises and finally a schedule for when to do what. Here's what you need to know... Some men, all too eager to see gains, have gone straight in at the deep end and done harm to their penis by not following the routine structure. Please be careful!

Warming up Just like any sports, warming up is very important to make sure that you protect your penis from any undue damage. If you fail to warm up properly then you're really putting a penis risk. I'll say it again, warming up is vital! First of all, you need to prepare your penis. Soak a washcloth in warm or hot water, then squeeze it out. Take the warm cloth and wrap it around the shaft of your penis (either flaccid or erect). Hold it right there for a minute, remove it, repeat at least twice. Next is to dry off your penis well. Many people have come up with different ways of warming up but I find the simplest to be dunking a towel in hot, but not boiling, water and wrapping it around your penis. The hotter the better – but please be careful not to burn yourself. Before you begin your daily exercises, you have to start off with this procedure for at least 5 minutes. The hot compress is useful because it draws blood to the area of your penis, thereby escalating the blood flow and making the skin more elastic. Another advantage is that this also ensures a good grip for the exercises you will be carrying out.

Lubrication Lubrication is necessary for all of the techniques we recommend here. Using the right lubricant will help you avoid irritation to the sensitive skin of your love gear.

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Penis Enlargement Bible There are many types of lubricants are used around the world. Of course, the most popular types are water-based personal lubricants. The water-based lubricants are so simple and easy to clean up, but tend to dry out quicker while you are exercising your penis. Therefore you may need to add more lube as you progress through your workout. While the petroleum-based lubricants are fine to use but they seem to be thicker and harder to clean up. Vaseline is the most popular of the petroleum-based lubricants, but we believe that VigRX oil works the best. This oil has been specially formulated to boost male enhancement. Now you are going to learn is standard stretching and standard Jelqing.

Stretching Standard stretching involves stretching penis so that the ligaments get longer under penis therefore gains length. The purpose of this method is to create tension in the erectile tissues by stretching the skin of the penis while in an erect state. Not only does this make the skin of your penis slightly elastic, it also expands the amount of the space in your penis chambers, the corpora cavernosa. The higher the amount of blood that can fill these spaces results in an enlarging of the overall mass of your penis. Stretching is so simple that you need to do is stretch the penis to make it longer. This involves gripping the penis just below the head and stretching it out with force to the ligaments gain size. There are six stretches. ď&#x201A;ˇ

Stretch one: While sitting on the edge of a sofa or bed, begin stroking your penis using your thumb and forefinger (the same "a-ok" symbol used in our other methods).

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Penis Enlargement Bible Pulling the penis directly in front of you. You put the penis out directly in front of you from 30 to 40 seconds. As you stroke the penis from the base toward the head, maintain a firm grip and stretch the skin as best as you can. 

Stretch two: you put the penis directly down for 30 to 40 seconds.

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Stretch three: people the penis directly up for 30 to 40 seconds.

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Stretch four: you pull the penis directly to the left for 30 to 40 seconds.

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Stretch five: you pull the penis directly to the right for 30 to 40 seconds.

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Stretch six: you rotate the penis all the way in a circular movement for 30 to 40 seconds.

Repeat each direction 2-3 times. With these six stretches all you have to do is four sets of each everyday. Only do this after you have warmed up correctly. After you've finished the exercise you can release the grip on the base of your penis. You should feel the blood begin flowing again. Go ahead, you may ejaculate at this point if you feel the urge. Remember to use a firm grip and enough lubrication, always exercise caution! Do not grip your penis too tight so that you lose the circulation. If you are in pain or feel any discomfort, then you are doing the technique in the wrong way. Read the instructions again and retry the technique slowly.

Jelqing Stretching exercises are useful for lengthening your penis. But in order for one man to increase the circumference, you have to perform stretching exercise while your penis is in a partially-erect state. Jelqing is the technique that develops the whole penis so that its length, thickness, weight, and density all become proportionately enlarged. Jelqing (also called "milking") is actually one of those ancient practices that has been performed for centuries by various tribes and cultures around the world. It's considered the most successful method of enlarging the penis. These “milking” exercises could force the blood into your penis. Over the course of several months, the blood spaces in the penis will gain volume. In other words; they can hold more blood. As a result, your penis gets larger.

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Penis Enlargement Bible Jelqing is slightly different from stretching. Standards Jelqing involves forcing blood through the shaft of the penis by using your hand to trap it so that the blood vessels expand. The standards jelq, the one that you'll be using for the first number of weeks, requires that you make a shape with your thumb and forefinger. To make this easier to explain simply make an okay symbol with your hand. The 'O' that you create through doing this will form the basis of your jelq. The Standards jelq involves gripping the penis at the very base, squeezing tightly, and milking penis as you would a cow so that blood is forced to the tip. Standard jelqs should each last 3 seconds from the base to the tip. 1. Apply your lubricant all over the skin of your penis. Keep your lubricant close by since you will want it to last for as long as you need it. Don‟t use the soap because it tends to dry the skin. 2. With your thumb and forefinger, squeeze the base of the penis shaft. Pull downward. Stop at the head. Repeat, alternating hands. Each stroke should last about three seconds. The stimulation will certainly help you reach an erection. 3. When your penis becomes semi-erect (not fully-erect), make the "A-OK" sign with the thumb and forefinger of your left hand. With this hand, grip tightly around the base of your penis. 4. Now starting from the base, pull the penis gently yet firm. Stretch downward and outward. You have to maintain your semi-erect penis at this point. Make certain to start from the base the head with each stroke. Note that the head of your penis will get bigger with blood. 5. Switch to your right hand and repeat the stroke, starting from the base and stretching downward to the head. Alternate both hands in a smooth rhythmic ("milking") movement, touching upon every part of the penis except the very top part of the penis head. This is the very foundation of jelqing.

Don‟t forget that jelqing exercises are not performed during fully-hard erection. Make sure that your penis is between half to 3/4 erect. Results cannot be obtained until a partial erection is present. After this exercise has been done for quite some time, you will notice that your penis appears both longer and thicker. This is a fact. And we can assure you that from within one to several months of routine exercise, your penis will emerge quite huge; this is due to the impaction of blood in the penile tissues.

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Penis Enlargement Bible Carefully choose ONE of these jelqing exercise techniques that you feel comfortable with to include in your daily routine.

PC Muscle Workout What nearly everyone doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x;t know is that the pubococcygeus muscle (pyoo-bococksee-gee-us) or PC muscle plays a critical role in the functioning of the penis. The pubococcygeus muscle is actually a group of muscles that run from the pubic bone to the tailbone. The PC muscle is the muscle you bring into play to stop the flow of urine from the bladder. It is also the muscle that contracts whenever you ejaculate, moving the semen up through the penis and out of the body. The PC muscle is a busy little muscle, you know? But as far as most men are concerned, it is still grossly unknown. Mastering the techniques of male multiple orgasms is easy once you know how to train your pubococcygeus muscle. When you urinate and you want to get the last drop out, you use your PC muscle in the opposite direction. By doing this you'll feel your anus open and the feeling will be somewhat different. Most men can do Kegels anywhere, since they're seldom aroused by the exercises. Continued over a lifetime, the exercises can help men and women avoid urinary incontinence as they age. That, plus greater arousal, enhanced orgasms and longerlasting sex, make Kegels one of the simplest, most beneficial exercises a man or woman can do throughout their lifetime. Be careful though. Using your PC muscle can have negative effects. If you produce too much testosterone then you will find that you ejaculate prematurely. However if you follow our guidelines you will actually enhance your ejaculation control. The basics of the PC muscle work out involve you clenching your muscle as hard as you can for a certain amount of time. To find the muscle in question all you have to do is stop the flow of urine when you are in the toilet. In the e-mails that we send you we will give you an exact routine every week.

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Penis Exercises: Stepping It Up A Gear (Advanced Exercises) These next exercises are more advanced. You will use these as your penis becomes more used to being exercised in this way. They introduce more strain to the penis. If you were to use more advanced exercises immediately then you would do far more damage than good. The stretches and jelqs are slightly more complex. You will not be using these exercises for a number of weeks. You will be e-mailed exactly what you should be doing that week, and these exercises will make up a part of your later routines. Advanced Stretching Advanced stretching it's just different ways of forming stretching exercises. They stretch different parts of the penis.

The Wrist Stretch The wrist stretch is a way of applying pressure to the middle section of your penis midstretch. It stretches the ligaments more authority, but could also do more damage to your penis if your penis hasn't been trained by doing the simpler exercises first. The Wrist Stretch involves gripping your penis just below the head, as with the standard stretch, and stretching penis directly in front of you, to the left, to the right, up and down. To add more pressure to this stretch, you take the wrist of your free hand and apply pressure to middle of your shaft as you stretch before force. So, if you were stretching to the left, you would apply the wrist pressure on the left hand side of your shaft. If you were stretching up, you would apply wrist pressure to the other side of your shaft. If you stretching down, it would apply pressure to the bottom etc. Please don't attempt the Wrist Stretch unless directed by one of our e-mails.

The Big Seated Stretch This is a very long stretch for those of you who have time and privacy. Each stretch takes 10 minutes to complete. By that I mean literally 10 minutes of nonstop stretching.

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Penis Enlargement Bible To perform the stretch, grip your penis while seated by raising one leg up and putting your hand underneath it then gripping just below the head. Then, pull with full force and hold for 10 minutes. For the next set, lift up your other leg and using your other hand repeat the process.

The Big Squeeze The Big Squeeze is placed in this section because it is more a stretch than a Jelq. This routine simply involves squeezing your penis by putting it on the table, and using the flattened palm of your hand, push down on the penis. For this you push firmly by placing one hand on top of the other and using all your weight to squash the penis. You separate the penis into the upper and lower parts, and push down on each for 45 seconds

Advance Jelqing Advanced Jelqing is for those of you who want to see big girth and length gains. We've already seen standard Jelqing, but these advanced techniques will do much more to improve your size. You will notice there are quite a lot of Jelqing exercises that you can do. After you have completed our program, you will be a pro, and then you can develop your own jelqs. However, by the end of our program you will probably have reached the size that you desire anyway -- so you can forget all about Jelqing! Most Jelqing improves your length and girth. Stretching is reserved for length gains, but then length can also be obtained from Jelqing correctly. However, the main reason for using Jelqing is to improve your girth.

The Double-Handed Jelq Erection strength: 95% This is a variation of the standard jelq, the difference lies in using both of your hands instead of one. What you must to his start a standard jelq using your right hand, moving it up your shaft by about an inch, then with your other hand grip at the very base i.e. where your first hand started. Your left-hand is being used to trap the blood.

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Penis Enlargement Bible Now, with your right hand, jelq all the way up to just below the head of your penis. At this stage lots of blood will be trapped. Now, to gain length, finish your jelq with the first hand (your right hand) and slowly move your left hand up to just below the head. Then, take your right hand and gripped the very base again and continue this cycle. Important things to remember: your penis must be, and remain 95% erect. Only ever do this exercise after you have warmed up properly. This exercise is mainly for length gains, but by making a small variation you can turn it into a girth jelq. That is what we shall be looking at now...

The Double-Handed Girth Jelq Erection strength: 95% This Jelqing exercise is designed solely for improving girth. Start as you did the previous exercise -- so that your hands are either end (one at base, one just below the head). The only difference with this exercise compared to the last one is that this is your starting point. Now all you have to do, when there is lots of blood trapped in your penis, is to slowly push to hands together while maintaining a tight grip. What you will notice is that your shaft is being expanded as the blood is forced outwards. This is held for 30-60 seconds. Important things to remember: again, your penis must be, and remain, 95% erect. Only ever do this exercise after you have warmed up properly.

The Double-Handed Girth Bend Erection strength: 95% This exercise is similar to the last. With one hand at either end of your shaft, literally bend the penis forwards slowly, ruling it so that the bend moves from top to the bottom. Do this for 30-45 seconds. Repeat the exercise but in reverse i.e. bend it the other way.

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Penis Enlargement Bible Similar to the Double-Handed Girth Jelq, the object of this is to force your hands closer until they almost touch. The time spent on the movement from each end of your shaft to the center point should be 30-45 seconds. You can concentrate on different parts of your penis shaft while doing this. If you want to see more gains at the base than simply don't move your base and. If you want to see more gains closer to the tip, then don't move your upper hand. You can mix up the exercise depending on whether your girth gains are level or different at different points of your penis. Important things to remember: 95% erection. Ensure that you warm up.

Warming Down Each step of exercises should be ended with a gentle massage and a warming down session with the help of a hot towel. When you give a massage to your penis and apply some heat to it, it helps healing and rebuilding of the cell tissue. You see, heat promotes faster growth of tissue cells and it restores the sensibility problems you may have had during your enlargement exercises. So after each exercise, you have to massage your penis softly for about 1 minute. You should perform a soft and circular motion with your forefinger and middle finger along the base and the shaft of the penis. Be very gentle with your moves here since your penis has just been through some serious hard workout. Following the massage session, you should apply another hot towel around your penis, just like you did for the warm up. This part of the practice is as essential as the first one because the heat will stimulate the damaged parts and will make them function well again.

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Penis Exercises: The Schedule

This is the schedule that you can start today. Alone, it won't have any affect. Until you have assimilated all of the required nutrients and biochemicals into your body, you will just get improved erections and maybe a very small amount of growth. Usually it takes 10 weeks to see real gains, but you will notice a harder penis after a few weeks. Biochemical growth will cause rapid growth – it's what worked for me when I finally after years of trying – stumbled upon the secret to getting a bigger penis. But exercises increased the speed at which I gained by about 22% when those biochemicals were present. Here is the exact exercise schedule that I used...

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Exercises

Weeks 1-3

Time spent on exercises per day: 15-20 minutes. Gently massage your penis and surrounding area with a warm cloth. You want to loosen up your penis and the muscles around it. Do this for 2-3 minutes. Standard stretching is the only way to begin! For this hold each stretch (outwards, up, down, left, right and around) for 30 seconds. Your penis must be flaccid to do this or you will hurt yourself. Go through this cycle twice. Exercise you PC muscle in the process by flexing it in the manner similar to controlling your bladder flow. This technique helps you preclude premature ejaculation. After 20 minutes, give your penis a rest. Wrap a warm towel around your penis and then repeat the routine after a few minutes of sufficient rest. Now continue on to the standard jelq. Do this for 10 minutes, and then warm down. Perform these exercises 5 days a week. Give yourself the weekend (or any two days) off. You will notice that your erections become harder and you may see a little growth. In week 3 spend 10 minutes doing the Double-Handed Jelq as well. Exercises to use: Standard Stretching Standard Jelqing

Weeks 4-5

Time spent on exercises per day: 15-20 minutes. Exercises to use: Standard Stretching Take a seat with you back vertically straight and mare sure to lubricate you penis. With one hand, grab the base of your penis squeezing the

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Penis Enlargement Bible penis shaft as you move towards the penile head. Once there, use your other hand and start anew. Do the squeezing routine for 3-5 seconds as you moved from the penis base to the head. Repeat this action over a 5 minute period without attaining a full erection or ejaculation. Standard Jelqing Gently encircle your penis and moving your hand up to the head, concentrate of pushing the blood up the penis. On reaching the head of your penis, take your other hand to the base and perform the same motion with your other hand. The Wrist Stretch Grip your penis firmly just below the head and stretch it gently to the left, to the right, up and down. Repeat this technique for about 5 minutes. The Big Squeeze Place your penis on the table, squeeze and put pressure on your penis with your palm firmly. But donâ&#x20AC;&#x;t be so hard on your penis. Keep repeating this for about 2 minutes.

Weeks 6-8

At the end of this cycle you will have your body at its optimum. This is the last transitional stage. Because of that you shouldn't do everything yet. However, you can split your exercises into morning and night. You should do more advanced, intensive jelqs and stretches as your penis starts to get ready for growth. Spend between 20-30 minutes a day exercising. Now you can do everything but the Ultimate Girth Jelq and the Double-Handed Girth Bend. If at this stage you have already begun to see growth then by all means do the others. You'll now know the feeling of a good workout so you will know which exercises you respond to best. Also, mix up what you do. Keep your routines fresh for the best results.

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Penis Enlargement Bible Week 8

Well done, my friend! You have been through a great experience towards enlarging your penis. Don‟t get too excited though because your first week is nothing. But now you can create your own routine. You‟ll have noticed what you respond to best. Tailor-make your exercises and growth will happen. Spend at least 15 minutes a day on intense workouts.

Note: Before any exercise you have to warm up and afterwards you have to warm down.

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Conclusion

That's the basis of penis exercises! This is a complete part of the system that I discovered (almost by accident!) which caused my penis to get bigger by 3 inches in length and 2 in girth. Why am I sharing this? I'm sharing this information because some really sneaky “gurus” are selling this information and making a profit out of it. That would be cool, and I'd be fine with it if it worked. But, here's the thing, it doesn't on its own! I personally wasted hundreds, if not thousands of dollars on penis enlargement stuff. And ALL of it failed until I stumbled upon the solution that worked wonders for me. So, this free guide is here to stop you getting ripped off. I am not a wealthy guy and at some points when I shelled out a fortune on these products I was really frickin' poor. So if I help one guy save a bit of money and get better educated then I think this guide is a good thing. So how do natural size gains happen? I've said exercises accelerate growth, and here's how my complete system worked for me. Please remember that I'm not an expert! I'm just a regular dude who found

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Penis Enlargement Bible something that's worked incredibly well for me and the few people I shared this info with. The way that my biochemical method works is by making your penis naturally grow. All you need to do is to restart the production of certain biochemicals in the body. These biochemicals were responsible for growth when you were going through puberty, and can be made to be produced in the body now, just like they were then. If you can do this then you will begin penis growth. Most people don't know about this vital technique because the enlargement industry makes much more money selling very expensive methods which don't deliver results. However, getting your body ready to make your penis bigger is the only way (other than surgery) that you can cause real gains in your penis size. That is the reason why other products (as you probably have discovered) fail, because they ignore this highly important aspect of growth. The way to make your penis bigger is by getting those biochemicals (which caused penis growth during puberty) back in the body. Then: BOOM! You will start to see gains. If you guys are interested in this then let me know. If you're not part of my members email list then sign up now - and you can email me directly from there! It's at www.PenisEnlargementBible.com. If you guys want these secrets badly enough then I'll tell you them! I would rather that than you getting scammed by the big businesses like I did. All the best. Your friend,

John Collins http://www.PenisEnlargementBible.com

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Penile Size Chart Queen Truth about penile expansion lyrics. -- Friday October 31, 1997 (additionally Replayed on master Tape Theatre may just 23, 2008 and Sunday, November 1, 2009) -- The Craziness begins. 10/31/ninety seven. 6:15am today was going to be a colossal Halloween exhibit with The powerful Kreskin so Stuttering John used to be up in Harlem getting some folks to come all the way down to the studio. Kreskin needed a bunch of strangers to use in a séance that he'd be doing later in the show. Howard figured that identifying some humans proper out in entrance of a methadone clinic would be best. John bought some drug addicts and different wacky humans to return with him for $20 and a few food. Now not too long after talking to John on the cell about that, Gary came in and mentioned that Kreskin had arrived. Gary also complained about the way in which Kreskin slapped him on the back. He said that Kreskin hit him so rough that it left a hand print on his again! It was nonetheless stinging 20 minutes later! Jackie had the equal main issue with the fellow. Kreskin said that he doesn't suggest to do it. It just occurs. The Mike Walker game With guest Mark Wahlberg. 10/31/97. 7:30am Actor Mark Wahlberg, aka Marky Mark, came in to plug his movie ''Boogie Nights'' which hits the theaters in these days. Howard spent some time speakme to Mark about his singing profession and about how he not talks like a ''wigger''. Mark said that he needed to take voice classes to get that speech sample out of the way in which. He is a legit actor now so he has to communicate higher english now. Crackhead Bob used to be additionally there getting made up as ''Crackenstein'' for halloween. Howard had him are available to play the Mike Walker recreation. Ralph made him as much as look like Frankenstein. Howard said the makeup was once best. Just earlier than playing the sport Mark confirmed Robin his third nipple. Yes it's authentic, he has a 3rd nipple. So anyway, on to the Mike Walker game. Listed here are the four experiences, certainly one of them is a false. The item is to decide upon the false story: a fan of Wil Smith crashed her auto attempting get to him. After the crash she ran over to get his autograph without stopping to see what happened to the auto she hit. Brett Butler is in problem once more with her cursing parrot. The mum and dad of her baby co-superstar are upset with the word that come out of the parrots mouth. When Jerry Seinfeld ran into Tim Allen at a restaurant he went over to congratulate him for his new $1.6 Million per episode contract. Jerry sent his invoice over to Tim with a written message announcing ''To the number 1 paid actor from the quantity 2, thanks for dinner''. Kelsey Grammar is attempting to get his wife Camille a permanent job on his television show ''Frasier''. Camille says that if Jenny McCarthy can have a show why can't she. First to bet used to be Crackenstein. He picked quantity 2 because the fake, Mark Wahlberg picked quantity 1, Robin picked three, Howard picked four and Jackie picked 2. Fred sat out for this one. The actual false story was once quantity 2. Amazingly Crackenstein was once the only one to get it right. After the game Howard spent just a few extra minutes with Mark. The Craziness Continues With The mighty Kreskin. 10/31/ninety seven. Eight:20am be aware: This segment will air on E! Tonight at 11pm! Now on to the huge a part of state-ofthe-art show. The effective Kreskin came in to do a séance and to have any one channel the late Sam Kinison. He chose about 20 people for the séance. The people have been seated at bridge tables and that i think there were 4 per table. Kreskin had the people keep fingers and after announcing just a few words the tables were shaking and falling aside right in entrance of every body's eyes. One of the vital guys received so freaked out by the whole factor that he ran out in tears! It ought to were beautiful actual for that guy. He was crying anything about seeing his dead brother or whatever as he ran out. He later stated that his brother died a couple of month in the past. I assume he idea he was once contacting him or something. Howard and Robin gave the impression amazed with the aid of what used to be taking place. Kreskin did a couple of exclusive matters to demonstrate what used to be occurring. He had one of the most individuals at the table take their hand away and the desk would discontinue shaking. After that trick was achieved Howard had to take a spoil. After the wreck they came again and Kreskin had 7 people that he can be trying to have Sam Kinison channel by means of. He did some hocus pocus on the guys and then had ''Sam'' communicate via them. The one concern with the entire factor was once that each and every man contradicted the following. One guy would go into a Kinison voice and say that he neglected drugs greater than his ex-wife and yet another guy would say that men and women will have to steer clear of drugs and live lifestyles easy and a different man would say that he used to be pissed that his ex-spouse acquired married. It simply wasn't believable sufficient. Kreskin would then ask the guys if they remembered what they'd simply achieved. Of direction they didn't. It was once still particularly pleasing although. The strong Einziger Explains Kreskin. 10/31/97. 9:40am After Kreskin left, Scott Einziger from E! Told Howard that he knew how Kreskin did his tricks. They'd a discussion for the duration of a commercial destroy and Howard suggestion that Scott's explanation used to be so ridiculous that he introduced it up on the air. Scott informed Howard that Kreskin does the whole lot with his vigour of recommendation. It's still pretty strong despite the fact that that's how the guy does it. However there were 20 humans that he did it to and Howard does not know the way the guy can use his energy of advice to get that many men and women to cooperate with him and make tables shake. It seems like Howard was nonetheless impressed with what Kreskin did despite the fact that he is aware of that they weren't fairly contacting any useless men and women. The argument went on for a even as until Howard made Scott do his own séance with just a few persons. Keep in mind that he couldn't get them to do the same thing as Kreskin. This entire dialogue ultimately changed into an even stupider one. Howard and Ralph were arguing about why the big name Trek show has a black Vulcan. Ralph does not suppose it's correct. They argued about that area for yet another 20 minutes after the Kreskin factor. What a full day of wackieness. -- Thursday October 30, 1997 -- creator Les Krantz Calls In. 10/30/97. 7:35am This man wrote a e-book known as ''The Definitive guide To The first-class And Worst Of the whole lot''. It has plenty of statistics for just about everything you can assume. Howard ended up talking to this man 3 special times throughout the show today. The mentioned things like which state has essentially the most Jewish humans in it and which metropolis has probably the most homeless. Here are a couple of examples: State with the most Jews - new york 1,645,000 quantity 2 is California with about 922,000 State with the least Jews - South Dakota, Idaho, Wyoming - tie with lower than 500 per state! Metropolis with the most important percentage of black people - Detroit with 75.7% metropolis with probably the most homeless people - New York city with over fifty five,000 metropolis with the largest crime expense - Miami Florida So that's what the book is ready. There are a bunch of

other things that they mentioned when Howard talked to him later within the morning. A few of them are going to be within the sequel to this e-book. Listed here are a couple of extra: The loneliest job - Astronaut Which vegetable has essentially the most energy - Potato What day is essentially the most preferred for tv viewing - Sunday Which race has the most important penis size - Scandinavian guys the biggest penis ever measured on a person - thirteen inches. New Jersey Governor Whitman Calls In again. 10/30/ninety seven. 8:10am Governor Whitman known as in for the second time in 2 weeks to speak with Howard. She'll be coming right down to the studio on Monday. Howard is backing her for the 2nd time now. Caller Who Slept along with his Twin Sisters! 10/30/97. 8:30am This guy called in to get some recommendation from Howard. He instructed a story about how he ended up slumbering together with his two more youthful sisters one night. He's 25 they usually're 19. He used to be serving to them out with their laptop or whatever and they ended up going out and getting drunk. When they acquired back to their condo one thing ended in one more and so they had sex. He said it was once the great sex he ever had. The man is married too. According to what he mentioned his sisters appear like Crystal Bernard and his wife looks like the woman who performs the instrument Time girl on ''home improvement''. He said that his sisters need him to return again up this weekend and he wanted to grasp what to do. Howard didn't have a lot advice for the man but i am sure he'll do what's right.. And simply what exactly is the proper factor to do? Aerosmith Autographed Guitar Giveaway. 10/30/ninety seven. 9:10am Howard had an autographed Les Paul guitar to provide away this morning so he played the homeless game. This is where he gets a listener on the mobilephone and plays tape of a homeless guy answering questions. If the caller guesses thoroughly at whether or no longer the homeless guy answers properly he can win the guitar. He has to get 3 out of 5 guesses right. Listed below are the 5 questions and answers: query Caller answer right? What number of aspects does a rectangle have? Y perhaps 3.. Flawed finish this noted quote ''give me liberty or supply me. '' N Hope mistaken What nation used to be Hitler from? N Germany proper What country was Napoleon from? N England mistaken what is frozen water known as? Y Ice right As you will discover the caller acquired 3 out of the 5 correct so he gained the guitar. After that contest there were nonetheless extra inquiries to play so Howard and the gang had been making a bet on the outcome. Listed here are the questions and answers for those: question reply right? The place was J.F.Okay. Shot? Florida wrong title 2 of the Beatles. Paul and ? Correct how many kids is triplets? Two improper who is Batman's sidekick? Robin correct what number of hours are in a day? 24 correct The having a bet used to be loopy so i could not inform you who gained probably the most but Robin ended up coming out even after losing really a bit. As Howard cited, they should have identified how dumb the fellow would be for the reason that on the establishing of the questioning he mentioned that he can not learn. -- Wednesday October 29, 1997 -- Jackie's joke publication Hits The book shops. 10/29/97. 7:20am ''Jackie The JokeMan Martling's Disgustingly soiled shaggy dog story e-book'' has been released and is now being offered in e-book stores all over the country. Howard wrote the ahead for Jackie so you may also want to check it out for this reason alone. I am sure there are some funny jokes in the ebook additionally. Jasmine St. Claire is available in. 10/29/ninety seven. 7:25am Porno megastar Jasmine St. Claire was supposed to demonstrate an act that she's performed before the place she has flames shooting out of her private components. She could not do it in these days in view that she had a little bit accident the other day. This thing that she uses has a couple of tubes coming out of it to shoot the flame. One of the most tubes broke or melted and burned her exclusive field. She did have a video tape of one other time when she did it although. Howard watched it rather. It must have a hell of a sight. She had like three foot flames capturing out of these tubes. I don't know exactly what it gave the look of however it need to were nuts. There have been additionally 2 firemen who came down to the studio for her demonstration however they weren't wanted today. They have been dressed in full equipment and had first aid presents just in case she damage herself. They did get the risk to see one of the vital video tape although. The Luckiest unfortunate Man Alive, invoice Goss, Calls In. 10/29/97. Eight:10am This man invoice Goss wrote a ebook referred to as ''The Luckiest unlucky Man Alive''. The book is about his many close-demise experiences. The fellow pointed out 5 - 6 one of a kind horrible experiences and i'm certain there are extra in his book. Listed below are just a few examples of his shut calls: At age 9 he practically drown in a sink. He dangled off the aspect of a mountain whilst climbing. He was once hit via a car that was doing about 60 mph and had an out of body expertise. A truck he was using loaded with 2000 pound bombs blew a tire and spilled the bombs on the road. He had a wasp fly in his mouth and sting him a bunch of instances whilst driving a motorbike. I would stay away from this guy if I were you. Bad good fortune appears to comply with him around. He will be signing books on the Borders books in the short Hills Mall in New Jersey on November 15. Convey a hard had and hearth extinguisher.. A bit of more wackieness before the man got off the mobile. He as soon as tried to get Howard's publication ''exclusive materials'' taken out of ebook stores. His kid picked up the booklet and saw the photograph of Jackie sticking his finger into a guy's ass. He wrote to the ACLU and a few other organizations who advised him that Howard had the proper to submit what he did. The fellow did not understand that Howard knew about that once he referred to as in. Howard wasn't being a dick about it either. He was once simply within the guy's experiences. Jackie Breaking Copyright laws!? 10/29/97. 9:15am A photographer known as in to inform Howard that probably the most portraits in Jackie's new book had been used with out permission. The man who referred to as in went out and purchased the guide this morning and seen proper away that one of the most images have been his. He stated that he sends his images to the copyright place of work in Washington DC a couple of weeks after he takes them so technically Jackie is breaking copyright legal guidelines. The man wasn't too upset about it although. He stated that he'd settle for Jackie to eat some chocolate cake out of his ass or anything like that. We almost always have not heard the last of this little incident. -- Tuesday October 28, 1997 (usual write up) -- Suzanne Somers/Queef girl/guy Who gives Oral To Himself. 10/28/ninety seven. 7:30am Suzanne Somers came in to plug a few matters this morning. Her tv exhibit ''step by step'' has moved from ABC to CBS and airs Friday nights at 9:30am. Her guide ''devour satisfactory, drop extra pounds'' used to be considered one of her different plugs. She can also be promoting her own line of jewelry that she designed. She's also writing another guide about her existence. The final one she wrote pointed out

the fact that she used to be a mattress wetter and all types of different just right stuff. K, enough about Suzanne's plugs. Howard told Suzanne that he had a woman who loves to make use of the Butt-master excercize computing device which Suzanne used to advertize on tv. He had the lady are available in to show Suzanne how so much she preferred it. Well the woman came in and started the excercise and abruptly there were farting sounds coming from her. She wasn't farting although, she was queefing from her vagina. The girl went on to illustrate her skill for Suzanne and her husband Alan. She did fairly a few of them and even tried to do it standing on her head. That didn't work although. After that Howard had a guy who claimed that he would ''Orally please himself''. The guy wanted to get his band's music performed on the air so he said he'd show. The man isn't in the band, he stated that he just promotes them. The guy wanted a few minutes to get himself able for the demonstration so Howard took a industrial ruin and let the fellow go to the bathroom to get himself exicted. They got here back from business and the guy could not get himself within the right state of intellect but mentioned that he might still do it. In the interim a document corporation guy known as in and mentioned that he'd provide the band a demo deal if the fellow might clearly do it. Well, the guy did it and everybody was once cracking up laughing. Howard stated the man gave the impression of ''..A chook pulling a worm out of the ground..'' as he was doing it. Suzanne used to be speechless. Howard did play the band's track but it particularly wasn't that excellent. The name of the band is ''Quartermint'' or whatever like that. They have a web page if you are interested: www.Quartermint.Com. Before Suzanne left she informed a narrative about how she received pregnant at age 16 while not having intercourse. She stated that she used to be carrying a skirt and her boyfriend was once sporting jeans. The boyfriend did his thing in his pants and she or he by some means received pregnant. After she left Howard stated that he failed to think her story. Whew! What a morning! Comedian Nick DiPalo Calls In. 10/28/ninety seven. Eight:55am previous within the morning Howard was once speaking about how he woke up in the center of the night in view that he couldn't sleep. He ended up observing The Tonight exhibit with Jay Leno. He noticed a comic doing some relatively humorous fabric however he did not recognize who it used to be. That comic became out to be Nick DiPalo. He called in to thank Howard for bringing up how funny he was once. Captain Janks, Crackhead Bob And Kenneth Keith Kallenbach come in. 10/28/97. 9:30am Janks, Bob and Kenneth are doing a mini-tour together in order that they got here in to plug some of their look dates. Crackhead Bob even had his fiance with him. She seemed best in keeping with Howard. Bob is one fortunate man. He can barely speak or walk but he has a lovely, dancer female friend. She advised Howard that she used to bop on MTV's The Grind. She's now a hip-hop dance instructor. Howard spent most of the phase speakme to Bob and his girl (who's identify escapes me right now). They have got a just right sex life and Janks mentioned they look to fairly be in love with one an additional. Kenneth Keith was once variety of mellow at present. He was placing on his voice more than usual but he was once taking it handy. He stated that certainly one of his songs will likely be featured on an upcoming WYSP (Philly Station) compilation CD. The guys will likely be appering at the Micro membership in Philly on Friday night, Sweeny's on Saturday and a few other places that I ignored. -- Tuesday, October 28, 1997 (As replayed on Friday, November 10, 2006) -- grasp Tape Theatre - October 28, 1997. Eleven/10/06. 6:00am Howard was off today so we had another version of grasp Tape Theatre which is a replay of an historic okay-Rock show. Present day replay was once the October 28, 1997 show. I did a write up of this show back in 1997 but I've up to date it with what I heard today. All instances are different than they have been when the exhibit originally aired on the grounds that they've cut out some of the classified ads that aired back then. Howard begins The show, Takes A spoil. 10/28/1997. 6:00am show opening bits and songs integrated: James Taylor performing ''Carolina in My mind'' are living in Howard's studio, Geraldo Rivera introduction for Howard Stern. Howard mentioned they had a busy exhibit developing at present. They had a guy who says he can service himself coming in as well as Suzanne Somers, Captain Janks, Crackhead Bob and others. He also recounted the exhibit made the news after they'd Amy Heckerling in the studio the day before. He read some of the article swiftly after which took a business break. Jeanine's Telepathic Powers. 10/28/1997. 6:05am After the spoil Howard stated individuals have been calling him asking about the stock market. He stated the stock market goes up and down at all times and you can't manage it. He spent a couple of minutes speakme to the fellows about why the market had taken a dive. He joked that Steve Grillo had lost a whole $18 in the market. Jackie stated he used to be gazing the market the day before and it used to be rough to look it take a dive. Howard had this lady on the telephone by means of the name of Jeanine. He mentioned he received a letter from her the opposite day and she desired to talk concerning the invasion of her privacy. He was once trying to speak about that but the cell process sounded awful so he needed to whinge about that. Howard stated that Jeanine thinks that anyone has been invading her privacy and he or she believes that she can inform, via her telepathic powers, that Steven Spielberg, Kate Capshaw, bill Gates, Paul Allen, Harry Anderson, Richard Starkey (Ringo Starr), George Lucas, Natalie service provider, Amy provide and others are humans who are invading her privateness. Jeanine told Howard that she will get these ideas in her intellect about these individuals and she or he's been having them because 1989 or so. She's not certain why they're bothering her. She told Howard about these thoughts she will get in her head and the way she interprets them as men and women invading her privacy. Howard stated he believes that each one of these men and women are sincerely working collectively investigating her for a film undertaking. He requested Jeanine if that's what she thinks is occurring. Jeanine said she doesn't suppose that is the case. She also mentioned that she has not been dealt with for this drawback. Jeanine said she is not competent to work in view that of those issues she has. She has this popularity on account that of those people and that continues her from getting a job. Fred played the cuckoo clock sound at one factor at the same time they had been speakme to this woman. Howard took a name from a guy who idea Howard used to be main this woman on and making fun of her as an alternative of serving to her. Robin asked Jeanine if she has any person to deal with her. She stated she kind of has persons who support her out. Her loved ones tries to help her out with cash. Howard took one more name from a lady, Terry, who would not consider that she was actually on the air when Howard advised her she was once. She had to turn her radio off to understand that she was once sincerely on the air since of the prolong they'd. She then asked Howard ''what's up''

which drove him nuts. The lady informed Howard that having the woman on the air shouldn't be a shaggy dog story and he is just not treating her this way. She said that she's had identical problems however she has discovered to are living with it. She then informed Jeanine that she has a mental ailment and this is not taking place to her and she knows when you consider that she's been in the identical predicament. She cursed at one point so Howard had to ask her not to use profanity on the air. Howard asked Terry who was contacting her. She did not supply any names so Howard mentioned that he is beautiful certain no men have been contacting her with the voice she has. Howard tried to get it out of her however she wouldn't say who it was that used to be contacting her. He threatened to hang up on her after she used the S-word again. Terry stated that she thinks that Princess Diana is just not dead and he or she's clearly hiding out so she will come out after she wins superstar Search. Howard advised Terry that he heard from Princess Diana and he or she goes to come back out when she wins superstar Search. Terry mentioned she knows he is now not telling the truth and is aware of that it used to be all intellectual. Howard used to be going to hold up on Terry but she did not want him to. She asked Howard to inform Sage ''hi'' for her. She was seeking to say that for an old boyfriend of hers. Howard mentioned that the inventory market was once easier to figure out than these two. Howard advised Jeanine that he'd appear into this for her and let her go a short while later. He went to break correct after that. Howard tests Out excellent 10 journal. 10/28/1997. 6:35am After the ruin Howard told Robin that he goofed on Ralph the day before today by way of putting a fake penis in his shorts and telling him he needed him to investigate out a possible herpes sore on his penis. He said Ralph used to be fooled for a couple of seconds but then he realized he was once being goofed on. Howard stated he acquired a duplicate of this new journal ultimate 10 and it almost ruined his day. He stated the entire women are all typical they usually cannot have implants or anything like that. He said they're all hot and out of the 15 ladies, 5 of them stated that their favorite comic is Howard Stern. Gary could not feel that he learn through all of their profiles. Howard stated that this one chick, Jocelyn, was so hot and confirmed the fellows her ass. He rattled off her profile seeing that he had it memorized. He knew her favorite actor and all of that stuff. He figured he could get the woman after reading the profile. Then he came throughout Carolena who also mentioned she likes Howard Stern. He figured two females who preferred him within the same magazine used to be lovely cool. Then he came across Angelie who also mentioned she likes Howard Stern. After which Lexie's profile printed that she likes Howard Stern as good. Howard said he was once going nuts after studying all of that. Robin failed to feel that any of the ladies certainly even knew him. Howard informed Gary to e-book the entire women so that they would query them in regards to the profiles. Howard mentioned the journal has a waiter ballot the place they ask waiters in distinctive eating places where they ask about exceptional celebrities and the way they tip. Steve Martin obtained unhealthy mouthed with the aid of one of the waiters. Arnold Scwarzenegger acquired some pleasant feedback. Faye Dunaway was once also preferred by means of the waiters. He learn by way of a bunch of different celebrities that were listed in that article. Rodney Dangerfield received some poor suggestions while Tom Hanks used to be confident. Sylvester Stallone was once negative. Howard said that Rick Dees was listed in there and they stated that he's some of the nicest guys in show trade in keeping with the article. Howard's name was once also in there and he says he goes out of his option to depart excellent hints to be certain he would not go through this style of stuff. He mentioned he once left a $30 tip on a $15 invoice at a chinese language meals restaurant. Gary mentioned he knows that Howard leaves excellent suggestions and he is by no means complained at a restaurant. Howard read the article where any individual claimed that Howard has bodyguards with him when he goes out to eat. Howard stated that never happens. Howard explained how he's taken safety guys out to dinner with him however they weren't working as bodyguards. He mentioned they're most commonly simply guys who work for the individuals he is working for. He wrapped up the dialogue in regards to the magazine and stated that was once the plug they have been looking for. He could not get over the fact that all of these women had listed him in their profiles. He would also like to fulfill the waiter who unhealthy mouthed him in that article he was just reading. He stated he needs the 5 females who like him and the waiter from that article to be introduced in whilst. Quite a lot of Stuff. 10/28/1997. 6:50am Howard said the fellow who used to be coming in to perform fellatio on himself did not desire a prize, he wanted him to play his CD on the air. Howard questioned if he should convey that man in or learn some comments from Yanni. Robin wanted to listen to the Yanni factor. Howard learn an interview that used to be completed with Yanni where he defined why he would not wish to appear on the Howard Stern show even though he used to be invited. Howard learn Yanni's rambling comment about why he failed to need to appear on the show. Howard mentioned that he appears to be a jack-off asswipe to him. Howard spent a short time speakme about how he used to be gazing Jay Leno's show the night time earlier than and the way humorous this one comic was once on the exhibit. He stated he'd like to listen to that act once more. Letterman had Mariah Carrey on his exhibit however she only carried out a song alternatively of doing an interview with him. Howard was once also looking at Conan O'Brien's show which used to be variety of lame. He also mentioned Tom Snyder's show and how awful that is. He talked about how traumatic that guy looks and the way awful his exhibit is. He stated he is a frightening guy and he is now not sure how someone can watch that exhibit. Kreskin Prepares For subsequent look. 10/28/1997. 6:55am Howard had Kreskin on the mobile. He mentioned that Kreskin had some large information for them the opposite day when he referred to as Gary and claimed that he had won 21 hands of Blackjack in a row. Howard thought that he had finished that before to different radio stations however Kreskin mentioned he has under no circumstances performed that earlier than. Kreskin told Howard he wants to do whatever on the exhibit the place humans carry of their own card tables. He wants 28-32 individuals to try this factor but Howard instructed him he does not have sufficient room within the studio to do that. Howard asked Kreskin if he would smash the tables over his head if the bit sucks. Kreskin just laughed. Howard requested Kreskin if this was going to be exciting audio due to the fact that it is a radio exhibit. Kreskin said it will be intriguing. He said that one of the individuals they've in the room will think that they've been taken over through Sam Kinison and they will be equipped to ask him questions. Howard said he thinks this is going to be worse than Geraldo Rivera opening Al Capone's vault. Howard stated he can't wait to peer Sam Kinison in the room when Kreskin is

available in. Kreskin mentioned they are going to have a real channelling within the studio. Howard needed to go to interrupt a short time later. Suzanne Somers, Debbie The Queefer 10/28/1997. 7:15am Howard came back from break and said he used to be backed up with guests. He had Suzanne Somers and the man who was going to fellate himself ready to come in. He spent a short time speakme about Cindy Crawford's tv show and the way he thinks that she should just keep her mouth shut considering that she speaks in the sort of monotone. Howard had Gary deliver in Suzanne Somers so he might interview her. He checked her out and mentioned her husband looks like hell but she looks fine. He spent a few minutes speakme to her husband and pointed out this Buttmaster thing that Suzanne used to be selling. He told Suzanne they have got a woman there who used to be inclined to illustrate the Buttmaster for them in the event that they wanted to peer that. Howard requested Suzanne if she wanted to look the Buttmaster factor and likewise this man who claims he can fellate himself. Howard had the woman are available in to illustrate the Buttmaster. He had her sit down and give it a attempt to see what precisely it does. As she used to be doing it the girl let loose some queefs. Howard then mentioned that this was Debbie the Queefer who makes sounds together with her exclusive constituents. Howard informed Suzanne that they weren't farts but queefs which have been coming from her confidential ingredients. Alan mentioned that was the Queefmaster. Howard requested Debbie how she does that. Debbie mentioned she's equipped to suck the air in by means of contracting her stomach muscle groups. She confirmed it a little more for everybody. She even stood on her head and did some extra queefing whilst standing on her head. She sucked in some air and blasted it out once more. She blasted out a couple more before Howard let her go. Suzanne passed over one of her books for Debbie as she was once leaving. Howard got again to Suzanne and mentioned her guide income and the way they may be doing (Suzanne Somers' consume exceptional, drop a few pounds). He additionally brought up her bed wetting and household existence that he'd read about in her publication. She talked about how she was once equipped to discontinue herself from wetting the bed. Howard instructed Suzanne he doesn't know the way she will be able to do an interview with Tom Snyder on the grounds that he's this type of dangerous interviewer. She told him about how she once wrote him a letter announcing ''fuck you'' after he had stated something nasty about her. So Howard had to hit the prolong on her. Suzanne refused to do his show for a long time after he made that remark about her however she eventually went on and had fun. Howard advised Suzanne he needed to deliver this guy in to fellate himself seeing that he used to be going for walks out of time. He informed Suzanne about how the man bought booked for the show and how he claimed that he would fellate himself. Alan said if he could do this he would never get off the bed. The fellow came in wearing a cover so no person would appreciate him. He additionally got here in with a Playboy magazine to aid himself get aroused. Howard requested the guy some questions on how he discovered he might do this. The guy mentioned he used to be about 12 when he figured it out. Howard stated that his song isn't all that first-rate but that's the whole purpose he was there to try this. He desired his CD to be performed, that's it. Howard requested the guy if he has ever done a full completion of the act. Howard stated he possibly gay if he does that and did his cough ''haggot'' factor to the man. Howard spoke to this man's band mate Marco who gave the fellow's identify as Leon. They spent a couple of minutes talking however Howard had to take a ruin earlier than they could get to this guy fellating himself. Leon Fellates Himself In entrance Of Suzanne Somers. 10/28/1997. 7:40am After the spoil Howard requested Suzanne about Cindy Crawford and her awful interviews. He moved on to this man Leon who was once going to fellate himself. Howard mentioned he had a guy from a file organization on the mobile who used to be willing to give the guy a demo deal if he can without a doubt do that thing. The guy stated that Leon has to finish the job to get the deal however Howard mentioned they wouldn't be going that a long way with this man. Gary mentioned this guy used to be in Tommy Lee territory with the size of his penis. Suzanne mentioned she didn't wish any a part of this whole thing. She informed the fellow to consider of her as Chrissy Snow from Three's enterprise instead of Suzanne Somers. Howard told Leon that if he could do this thing he would get a file deal. The fellow couldn't get himself tough however he went proper forward with the whole factor and started to suck on his possess member. Robin took a look and bought fun out of it. Gary mentioned the fellow must be a fag if he likes doing that. Howard let the man from the file company, Matt, listen to this guy's band Quartermint and the fellow instructed him the name of the band was horrible. Howard said he had heard it already and it wasn't all that best. He performed one track and stated he knew it was once going to be unhealthy. Howard sang along with the song a bit of bit. Suzanne also sang a bit of bit herself. Howard let the song play through however talked over it and goofed on the man a bit of bit. Leon gave out a site nevertheless it was long gone as of this writing (11/10/06). Matt told Howard to have Gary get a hold of him and he'd talk to this guy about a report deal. He also received in a plug for the band Stereophonic which used to be a band he thought used to be going to be tremendous. Howard talked to Suzanne in regards to the jewellery she's been promoting and the entire different stuff she's been promoting. Suzanne informed Howard about all of that stuff for a short time. Howard gave her a plug for her ebook and seemed through it to peer the adorable pix of her. Suzanne advised Howard about how she bought pregnant via a guy although they didn't have intercourse. She believes that it happened by way of her panties after she fooled round with the fellow. Howard also requested about having intercourse with Suzanne and Alan didn't seem to have much of a predicament with that. Howard spent a couple more minutes speakme to Suzanne before going to commercial spoil. Montreal scores reviews. 10/28/1997. Eight:05am After the break Howard read a be aware from their Montreal radio station and the way they had gotten a giant rankings improve considering that going on the air up there. He mentioned CHOM used to be doing very good considering putting him on the air. Howard went through that article and bragged about how trendy they had been up there already. He mentioned that some persons couldn't believe that the French men and women up there could be being attentive to Howard Stern after his anti-French rant he did on his first day on the air. Howard performed a information document from up in Canada where they stated on his ratings up in Montreal. They had been already looking to get him kicked off the air. Howard had to fart so he had Jackie pull his finger. He mentioned he is been consuming quite a lot of peanut butter as of late and that's why he was once farting. He additionally acquired in some plugs for Reebok on account

that their garments had been fitting him flawlessly and he really preferred likes them. Comic Nick DiPaolo Calls In. 10/28/1997. Eight:15am Howard had comedian Nick DiPaolo on the cell. He was the comedian he was speaking about seeing on The Tonight show the night before. Nick informed Howard he really appreciated the best comments. He informed one of the jokes he was once telling that Howard liked. He used to be joking about staying in lodge rooms the place the warmness or air-con is on full blast and also you come to be with stuff to your nose like Triskets. He additionally made the whistling sound that his nostril makes with that crap in his nose. Nick additionally informed Howard about how he had some issues with this guy Bud Friedman. He stated Bob Schimmel was concerned within the courtroom case he was worried with. There have been four comedians whole if so. Howard definitely guessed that Schimmel used to be part of that on the grounds that he just figured he was the kind of guy who would get into something like that. Nick advised Howard how his buddy called him to let him recognize that he was speaking about him this morning. He rather preferred what he was pronouncing about him. He instructed Howard one other story about how he had a glass thrown at him at a club he was at one time because of a shaggy dog story he advised. Howard thanked him for calling in and let him go a short while later. Jackie mentioned he knows Nick but now not all that well. Doug Goodstein Calls In From Howard's relaxation stop. 10/28/1997. Eight:20am Howard stated that Doug Goodstein was down at his leisure discontinue in New Jersey. Doug stated they were looking to interview a number of men and women down there however it wasn't all that busy. The leisure discontinue was once on Rt. 295 in New Jersey. Howard said he heard that the rest discontinue is a homosexual leisure stop. One of the crucial truck drivers advised Doug that he used to be approached by a gay guy however there was no person round at this time. Doug stated that there used to be one truck idling and one trailer however that used to be about it. Howard let him go a short while later. Howard had a kid on the cellphone who claimed that his father had dated Robin at some factor. The child told her his father's identify and the place he claimed to have dated her however she denied ever having dated a guy by using that name. She said she was once never a nurse in New Jersey like the child's father claimed. Howard and Robin informed the child his father have to were lying to him. He let him go a short while later. Howard talked to the fellows about getting some homeless guys for the Kreskin factor that they had arising late within the week. Stuttering John mentioned that they had to pay the fellows like $20 to get them to come in. John said he goes all the way down to the unemployment place of work to pick up the homeless guys they use on the exhibit. Howard inspiration that was honestly a good proposal. Howard mentioned that Alice (loopy Alice), the girl who hates all black people, could be on the E! Show. He needed to go to break a short while later. Captain Janks, Kenneth Keith And Crackhead Bob visit. 10/28/1997. Eight:35am Howard got here back from wreck and played a prank name that Captain Janks made to Ed McMahon as Jim Carrey one time. He then moved on to a guy from Merryl Lynch who used to be giving them some advice on the inventory market. It used to be in reality Sal the Stockbroker pretending to be any one else. Howard hung up on him after he made some dopey feedback no longer understanding it used to be Sal. Howard had Captain Janks, Kenneth Keith Kallenbach and Crackhead Bob come in subsequent. He requested Fred to play the speech that Kenneth made for him one time that used to be pretty funny. Howard noticed a good looking woman who came within the studio and he was advised that it used to be Bob's fiancee. He said she used to be means too scorching for Crackhead Bob. He advised Bob that she was lovely. Crackhead Bob mentioned that he wanted Howard to marry them. The lady's name used to be Nina but Bob would handiest say it as ''Dina.'' Nina stated she loves Bob and she has not cheated on him. Howard had her rise up and said it looked like she misplaced weight. She said she's teaching dance and that helped her try this. Janks mentioned that she's a just right looking woman. Howard heard that Nina used to be dishonest on Bob but if she swears she isn't then he'll must take her phrase. The man who claimed she was cheating had hung up the cellphone. Howard said that Bob was once getting fats. He asked him if he used to be having tons of intercourse. He mentioned he was but Howard heard that he used to be having drawback getting it up. Nina said it can be now not a challenge now, they're getting it on simply pleasant. Bob said that they're doing it as soon as each couple of weeks. Nina told Howard that she's on start manipulate that continues her from getting her period and getting pregnant. She stated she would not get a interval considering the fact that of the pictures she will get. She mentioned that it reduces her intercourse force although so it can be not that high-quality in the case of that. Bob advised Howard about how he has intercourse with Nina and mumbled some stuff to him. Howard had them kiss and after they did that he figured they had been for actual. He asked Nina if he is a good kisser or no longer. Nina said that he is good and instructed Howard to present it a are trying himself. Nina instructed Howard she dances for Bob so Howard requested her to demonstrate for them. She stated she used to bop for the show ''the Grind'' so Howard suggestion it used to be form of humorous that she danced there but now dates Crackhead Bob. She danced and Bob had some strikes of his own as she was once dancing. Howard advised them to sit down after that. Kenneth mentioned that Nina might stand to lose about 20 pounds. She advised Ken that he would obtain 20. That seemed to confuse him. Kenneth informed Howard about some post cards he had made up along with his face on them. Howard talked concerning the time that Kenneth seconded his nomination for Governor of new York. He performed the audio from that day and acquired a few laughs out of that. Howard also had some tape of Captain Janks and Kenneth Keith having a snooze over. He stated that Ken taped himself slapping Janks within the face with dildos and stuff. Janks didn't find out about that unless Howard informed him about it. He informed Ken he'd better now not go to sleep close him each time soon. Howard requested Bob if he and Nina are going to get married each time soon. They didn't have any plans so Howard puzzled what was once up with that. Nina stated she doesn't need whatever large, just a bit some thing satisfactory. Howard asked Bob if he is afraid he's going to lose her if he does not marry her. Bob stated he's no longer petrified of losing her at all. Janks said they really do look to like each and every other when he hangs out with them off the air. Howard instructed Bob he thinks he had issues getting it up for Nina considering of his crack use. She said it would were her and maybe it wasn't Bob's obstacle. Howard seemed to believe it used to be Bob's crisis although. Howard asked him if he's ever finished anal on her. Bob isn't fascinated with that. Nina also stated that Bob

would not like to present her oral but Bob mentioned he does that always. He misunderstood and didn't recognize what they supposed. Nina said that Bob sucks her toes so Howard stated he wanted to peer that. He told Bob to go forward and do this. He put her entire foot in her mouth a short while later. Nina stated that females should appear into a person's coronary heart and no longer simply take them for what they consider they're. That's why she's with Bob. Howard took a call from a guy who mentioned he went to university with Nina and she or he used to be the most up to date chick in institution. He additionally stated he heard that she was once a psycho when she was once going out with one man who used to be in college when she used to be in high tuition. Howard mentioned she didn't appear to be appearing like a psycho today. The fellow stated she must be if she's going out with Bob. Howard noticed the ring that Nina had on her finger from Bob and it appeared beautiful nice. She was really engaged to him and Howard mentioned he'd like to have obvious her family's response to Bob being engaged to her. Howard asked Captain Janks and Kenneth Keith in regards to the women they've had and spent a minute on that. Howard asked if Bob's children had met Nina yet. Bob mentioned they'd met her however he's no longer even competent to consult with them himself. He stated he thinks that due to the fact that he's on the exhibit, his kids have a problem with him. Robin figured they had been getting a bit of little bit of ribbing from their classmates over him showing on the show. Howard took a call from a guy who said that Captain Janks has been doing forgeries of Howard's autograph for books he was once giving freely. Janks asked him what club he had long gone to where he received the guide he used to be speaking about but the man could not recall. Janks figured he was once full of crap and wasn't telling the truth. Howard wrapped up with them and went to break a short while later. And in the end. 10/28/1997. 9:05am After the ruin Howard had Robin begin her information. Howard spent a while speaking to Jackie concerning the inventory Market considering he appears to be into it. Jackie mentioned he is fairly not however nobody believed that. Howard took a name from crazy Alice late within the information and informed her she used to be going to be on the E! Show. She went off on Robin slightly bit and said that this was once Howard's exhibit and she or he is not speaking to her. Alice stated good day to her favorite character Fred and to Baba Booey as good. Howard wrapped up the show after that and ended it around 9:45am (master Tape Theatre Time) -- Monday, October 27, 1997 (As replayed on Friday, could 18, 2007) -- master Tape Theatre - October 27, 1997. 05/18/07. 6:00am This week's grasp Tape Theatre was from October 27, 1997. This exhibit was in my archives however no longer very exact. I've written it up today with more details as if I have been listening to it for the primary time. The usual write up is beneath this one. No trend Award For Howard. 10/27/1997. 6:00am show opening bits and songs incorporated: ''Throw Yo Mama From The instruct'' bit, Stone Temple Pilots performing ''Seven Caged Tigers'' live in Howard's studio, Jay Leno intro for Howard. Howard started off the exhibit asking what occurred at the VH-1 fashion awards in view that he was nominated for an award. Fred stated they may be no longer alleged to air except Tuesday. Howard requested Robin if she knew if he gained. She mentioned she thinks that it will have made the news if he had. Howard figured it might have made the information and gotten some publicity for the exhibit but they wouldn't want that. Howard said he obtained a satellite tv for pc dish so he needed to spend the weekend programming it. He mentioned he's obtained about 500 channels so it's hard to find just what you need. He did that and then watched numerous tv over the weekend. Robin stated he must be joyful that she's there, she needed to be rescued this weekend. He advised her to avoid wasting that until after the wreck. He mentioned they had been there reside, this wasn't a ''exceptional of'' or something like that. He went to interrupt a short while later. Howard inflicting Controversy In Canada. 10/27/1997. 6:15am After the ruin Howard played a information clip from a Canadian information record the place they were speakme about how the CBC perhaps removing Howard from the airwaves up there. They played a couple of clips of him joking around and making comments about passing fuel by means of his ''pungent bunghole'' and matters like that. In addition they talked about how first-rate his ratings had been up there after he raised the station's ratings by using 250 percentage after they put him on in Montreal. The document goes over the code of ethics the station has and the way they could also be eliminating Howard for violating them. They are saying there should be no abusive feedback concerning the persons. As the guys have been listening to that document there was once a variety of laughter coming from Howard and Jackie. Howard stated he liked the report. He thinks that he's generally damaged each legislation there. He asked for them to take away him from the air already, he's bored. He said they have a lot more of Canada to vanquish after that. He and Robin talked about probably the most jokes he mentioned for the period of the press conference they were pulling fees from. Robin misplaced On A Horse For three Hours. 10/27/1997. 6:20am Robin said she went out horse again using the day past and received lost in the woods. She stated she was once with a pal, in any other case she'd quite often still be out lost. Howard mentioned he was out driving his bicycle and he consistently ends up getting misplaced too. He mentioned he has to retrace his steps to get again. Robin said she was out for approximately three hours looking for her method residence. She mentioned the entire bushes seemed the identical and it was difficult to search out her manner back. She mentioned the horse definitely led them out of the woods the place they were lost. She said that they both ran into picnic grounds or lifeless ends. They even noticed a map at one point but that didn't aid them both. Howard mentioned Robin's horse have got to have finally earned it can be keep after getting her home. Robin stated the horse simply went up the hill that she suggestion they couldn't go up. She stated she didn't wish to go up the hill but the horse just went right up and over. She said she had persons ready for her in long island considering that she wasn't speculated to be out in the woods like that. She said some persons were sent out to search out them due to the fact that they were long gone see you later. She heard a megaphone asking if she used to be lost. They truely discovered her for the reason that they heard hear laughing out there. Howard said that he figures that they have got about .005 percentage of their listeners using horses that may relate to her lifestyle. Robin said that they had been fortunate considering it was beginning to get bloodless out and her pal's feet were beginning to freeze by the point they got out of there. Howard stated they had been customarily simply one hundred yards from the barn and failed to even comprehend it. Howard Talks About This New factor known as satellite tv for pc Radio. 10/27/1997. 6:25am Howard mentioned he ran into a guy who was once going to be walking within the NY city

Marathon and he simply cannot imagine doing anything like that. He stated he was once going to run in a race this weekend however backed out on the grounds that he didn't wish humans yelling at him as he was strolling alongside. He was registered under a different name however figured that there could be photographers there looking to take his snapshot. He inspiration about it lengthy and tough and decided to only keep house and watch satellite. He stated he loves that satellite thing on account that the snapshot is potent. He said that best three million folks have this DSS but there may be a brand new manufacturer out that's beginning some thing known as ''satellite radio'' and they're going to be equipped to stay digital radio for your automobile and there won't be any FCC issues with that. Howard said that you just must envision that for the longer term. He said that in 10 years from now it could be giant. He stated that you'd have got to get the radios into the automobiles and all over else. He said that you simply'd want this ''battery'' to put on your auto however it's particularly a receiver. He said that could be the dimension of the receiver, whatever like the scale of 1 / 4. Howard discovered the article he used to be reading about this ''satellite tv for pc radio'' and the way he thinks that it will create a bunch of latest jobs and it should be beautiful excellent. He discovered any other interesting articles that he learn while looking for that satellite radio article. He read about JFK Jr. Suing a hair dresser or something like that. He eventually located the article concerning the satellite tv for pc radio. The manufacturer was referred to as ''CD Radio'' and they were racing to discover a area for the studios. Howard mentioned they were thinking of having the studios in NY city. Howard stated they have been pronouncing they needed $500 million to get the company going. Howard suggestion that was a lot of money and it would take a while to ultimately get it available in the market. Howard said the satellite powered receivers would be about the size of a silver buck. He concept it sounded beautiful cool. Robin had many questions about it and questioned how the satellite thing would work due to the fact they do satellite stuff for the show and they most effective have a particular time to do it. Howard said that is due to the fact that they employ time on the satellite tv for pc to send out the signal for the associates. Scott The Engineer's Curse Lifted? 10/27/1997. 6:35am Howard talked extra about this JFK Jr. And the way he simply leaves his girl and doesn't fear about it. He said he might by no means do that after the way in which his father and mother pounded things into his head. He and Robin spent a minute on that. Howard mentioned that Scott the Engineer thinks that his jinx is long gone now that he's placed a gamble and gained. They had a fan call in and have him wager his $100 on a staff he wanted to lose and so they ended up successful so Scott thinks his curse is gone. Howard said if it was once Scott's possess cash and he had placed the guess himself, he would have misplaced. Howard had Gary come in to inform a story about a curse that is on the Cleveland Indians and where that every one came from. Then Scott got here in to talk about the bet he had won. Scott said it was once his possess cash, the guy gave him the $a hundred so it was once his cash at that factor. Stuttering John got here in and said that they would guess on some games tonight in the event that they desired to. Howard requested Scott if he wanted to wager him together with his possess cash. Scott said that he would choose the Dolphins but Howard advised him he wasn't going to take the wager. He said he failed to must take a bet if he failed to consider in it. He said that Scott is a loser and any guess he makes with him, he will lose. He has to take of venture that he likes though. Stuttering John told them that they could take another recreation so Howard said he'd do that. Scott stated the sport used to be a pot luck game and he failed to wish to wager on it. Howard mentioned he'd provide Scott whichever crew he desired however Scott failed to want to go for it. Howard wanted to play playing cards in opposition to Scott so he informed Gary to move get him a deck of playing cards. He spent a pair more minutes talking to Scott but stated he had to take a wreck. Scott claimed that his mind went with his coronary heart when he guess on one game that he misplaced on now not too long in the past. Fred did his affect of Scott and stated ''My intellect went with my hair'' and began laughing as he stated that. The blokes all goofed on Scott for a couple more minutes earlier than Howard needed to go to break. Sam Kinison From Hell Replay. 10/27/1997. 6:55am Howard came back from ruin and replayed the clip of the phone call that they had with Sam Kinison from Hell (Craig Gass). This is what happened final week. Sam Kinison Calls In From Hell. 10/22/ninety seven. Eight:30am each as soon as in a at the same time a mobilephone line falls on the grave of the late comic Sam Kinison so he is competent to call the show. When you do not believe that then a comedian who does an powerful impression of Sam calls in as Sam Kinison From Hell. Sam called in and talked slightly bit about woman Di and Gianni Versace being down there in Hell. He stated that when Versace arrived in hell the one factor he stated was ''appear what this man did to my suit!''. Sam did not wish to speak too much in regards to the dying of girl Diana but he did mentioned that Dodi Fayed has cheated on Diana with 3 of Sam's ex-girlfriends. He additionally said that there's one just right factor to come back out of the demise of girl Di. He stated that he has ''. One kick ass limo driver..'' Sam's connection was once lost quickly after that. The voice of Sam Kinison from Hell is played by comedian Craig Gass from Seattle. After playing that bit Howard moved on and mentioned this guys's journal and how they've a piece of writing about hiking and stuff like that. He mentioned that in this day and age you don't want a compass like you wanted years ago. Now people just convey their telephone phones with them and in the event that they get lost, they believe they may be able to simply use the cellphone. He said there were some guys who ended up getting lost and it fee the taxpayers $60,000 in search events to get them out of there. Howard Takes Some phone Calls. 10/27/1997. 7:00am Howard took a name from a man who requested if it was proper that there is a mentioned rift between Howard and David Bowie. Howard said he knew nothing about that if there used to be one. He stated he's frequently upset that he went on the Joan Rivers exhibit and talked to Angie Bowie, David's ex-wife, and requested her to inform them some thing excellent. She then blurted out that she had caught David and Mick Jagger in bed together one time. Howard mentioned he really respects his track and all of that. He mentioned he fairly loved his tune over time but he's no longer definite what happened to him. He stated he thinks he's uptight about his bi-sexual earlier and that's why he might be sort of embarrassed by way of what came out about him. Howard stated if Bowie comes on his exhibit, he'd higher do a few of his historical stuff and no longer that new crap of his. Howard took a different name from a man who said he grew to become close acquaintances with Tiny Tim toward the tip of his life. He said he met him at an antique exhibit one time and sat down and talked to him about his existence. He

said he would go to all of his shows and things like that. Howard figured that any one would do this however the guy claimed he had Tiny Tim's tooth and might show that he used to be close associates with him. Howard failed to care and hung up on the man. Howard took yet another call from a man who brought up Detroit and obtained Howard speaking about that. He said he worked there for a even as and knew how horrifying it could be there. Howard spent a short time speaking about that. Howard took a call from Melrose Larry inexperienced who stated that he had some stuff that will blow him away. He mentioned that he did not wish to mention names but there are some people on his station out in L.A. Which might be stealing from him and plagiarizing his show. Howard mentioned that is normal and he is used to that. Larry stated that they use pleasant American Nightmare of their opening of the exhibit. Howard said it is on an album so that's no enormous deal. Melrose went on to talk concerning the other things the show does to rip him off but Howard didn't want to hear it. He instructed Howard that their names were Conway and Steckler. Howard told Larry to get off his case and now not name him to rile him up. He said he's already in treatment so he must simply leave him alone. Howard stated he had the governor of recent Jersey on the telephone and couldn't spend time with Melrose. Melrose advised Howard that he's opening up for Jackie Mason at some comedy show. Howard mentioned he didn't consider that so he asked him to tell some of his jokes. Melrose informed Howard some of his jokes and Fred performed a bomb shedding sound after each funny story. Melrose mentioned he does eight minutes opening up for Jackie Mason and gave Howard about a minute of it. Howard told him he relatively should just take cyanide and get it over with. He hung up on him and moved on. NJ Governor Whitman Calls In. 10/27/1997. 7:10am Howard had Governor Christine Whitman on the phone. He mentioned how she kept all of the guarantees she made earlier than she was once elected and he used to be very pleased with her for that. He stated that he's going to recommend her again when you consider that of that and the truth that she didn't drive the insurance corporations to lessen their rates. He mentioned that if she had achieved that, it often would have chased them out of the state. Governor Whitman stated she is of the same opinion with that. Howard went on to complain about persons submitting phony coverage claims and how that factors rates to head up. Howard additionally talked to Governor Whitman about how he preferred that she failed to push for this late time period abortion ban that the right wing conservatives have been pushing for. He also likes that she didn't sleep with Marv Albert. He also appreciated that she kept her promise to name a leisure stop after him. Howard mentioned he will wait until about 2 days earlier than the election and then he'll begin his push for Governor Whitman. He said in the event that they get rid of her now, they'd be making a enormous mistake. He stated that humans don't rather make up their minds until the final minute in elections. He stated he appreciated the best way Governor Whitman seemed when he saw her on television not too long ago. She's been making herself up well in this day and age. Governor Whitman said she'd be in next Monday and she or he was once looking ahead to that. Howard let her go a short time later. Howard mentioned that Scott DePace used to be yelling about her not letting self-provider fuel stations within the state. He mentioned that is the last thing Scott should be traumatic about although. There are plenty of other disorders that she's taking good care of. Howard mentioned the man who's running towards Whitman is and peculiar man. Howard requested Scott DePace to come back in to talk about his complaints. Scott stated that Jersey has a number of legal guidelines which can be ridiculous. He mentioned that there is a regulation in opposition to self-service gas stations and he does not like that. Howard told Scott that he is acquired a low IQ and shouldn't be arguing these things. Gary came in and mentioned that Scott have got to be retarded considering the fact that he pumped his own gasoline in New Jersey just recently. Scott instructed him he couldn't had been in New Jersey. Gary questioned what kind of grievance that is for the reason that that implies you do not must pump your possess gas. Scott said that used to be just a minor grievance he had. He's obtained others as good. Howard instructed him that's ridiculous and informed him he's insane. Howard stated he had a guy on the telephone who says that there's a regulation against the self-carrier thing in New Jersey. Howard advised Scott he might speak to Governor Whitman about that subsequent week when she is available in. Satellite television Discussions. 10/27/1997. 7:20am Howard obtained again to speaking about satellite tv and how quality the picture is. He stated he has to use cable to get the neighborhood networks though so that's style of messed up. He stated they will ultimately work that out and they'll get the local channels on satellite television. He stated he loves it and how clear the image is. He informed Robin that he'll ought to have her over to investigate it out sometime. Robin stated that she requested Howard to return out and see her horse one time and he refused to contact it. Howard said that they may be simply colossal, dumb animals and he had no want to contact it. Howard mentioned Jackie was there with Robin's horse and he was bouncing on the object unlike Robin bouncing along with the horse. He stated Jackie used to be bouncing on it so hard it looked like it would damage the horse. He mentioned that you just must see Jackie on the horse, they must have tape of it on the grounds that E! Taped it. Howard stated he did contact that horse at some point. He mentioned he was once worried with the horse's nutsack. Howard talked more in regards to the satellite tv for pc television factor and what number of cool television indicates there have been to watch. He instructed Jackie that they've a new box now that permits you to look at your menus and spot tv while. He stated it is very cool stuff. He instructed Robin that he was staring at a football game and likewise a countrywide cheerleading competitors. He mentioned they're some scorching broads in that competitors. Gary stated that the indicates are mostly subsidized through Tampax and that makes him feel form of gay. Howard informed him it's a long way from gay and he is looking at it for the hot chicks. Howard talked in regards to the stuff the commentators speak about in the course of the competitions and the way atypical they may be able to be. Gary said he's visible some excessive university cheerleading competitions as well. Gary mentioned that there are a number of ESPNs out there now and they have got all of that stuff on there. The blokes pointed out probably the most loopy channels they've in the market now. Howard mentioned he blocks out most of that stuff considering that he does not watch it. Writer With 3 Personalities, Jeanie chippie, Calls In. 10/27/1997. 7:30am Howard said that he had this woman Jeanie chippie coming on the show. She has 3 particular personalities. Howard mentioned they may be speaking to all three of them today. He acquired her on the phone a short while later after Fred performed some horror film

tune. Howard asked Jeanie if she's a kook. She said that she's not cuckoo in any respect. She claims that every body has three personalities and wanted to provide an explanation for what she supposed. Robin asked if she qualifies for the carpool lane with these three personalities. Howard didn't wish her to maintain goofing on her like that. Howard asked Jeanie about what occurred to her that made her like this. She stated that she did not particularly have the threat to boost when she used to be a little one. She stated that she wasn't molested or whatever like that but her father was an alcoholic and he treated her very poorly. She said that they found their father passed out one time and that used to be an awfully annoying event for her and her sister. She said that once she had a break down in any case of that, she learned all of her personalities. Howard desired to speak to the exceptional personalities individually however she stated that customarily would not occur. She stated that they're all integrated. Howard requested Jeanie if she had different varieties of apparel and things like that. She said she absolutely did and some personalities wouldn't touch the other's clothes. She stated that she's all built-in now so these separate personalities do not come out like that anymore. Howard asked her if she ever aroused from sleep with a sore ass after one of the crucial personalities went out and had anal. She said she does not don't forget if it ever did. One in every of Jeanie's personalities was referred to as JJ and she or he used to be the promiscuous one who would exit and prefer up guys. Jeanie stated that everybody has identical personalities in them and that is what she writes about in her book ''naked As We Stand.'' Howard said he was hoping that her personalities would all come out and arguing with each different or anything like that. Howard requested her how she wrote the ebook if she would not comprehend what her different personalities did. She stated she was once equipped to do it years ago. She mentioned they informed her there was once nothing bodily unsuitable along with her and it was once all from now not setting up frequently as a youngster. Howard took a call from a girl who claims she's received 3 personalities as well. Howard asked her if one among them is a whore. She said ''oh fuck yeah'' to that. Howard requested her a number of questions about that however he mentioned he used to be getting stressed by all of it so he gave up on it and let each of the ladies go. Howard took a call from a man who mentioned that that is just an excuse for these ladies to head act like whores. Howard agreed with him. The caller additionally said that he thinks that any individual can write a e-book now that he's heard that girl. He additionally stated he feels like going out and being a whore right now. Howard had to go to break after that. Horrifying science - baby screens. 10/27/1997. 7:55am After the spoil Howard had Steve Grillo in the studio. He requested him to keep quiet since he has no character. He advised Steve he might leave for now until he gets to his fashion Awards protection. He mentioned he had this man on the cellphone who says that these little one screens which can be out now will allow you to pick up neighbor's displays. Howard acquired the guy on the phone and requested him what happened to him. The fellow stated that they had been clearly choosing up a phone conversation on their child display. He mentioned that the 2 women that had been on the telephone have been lesbians they usually have been arguing about their sleeping arrangements. Gary mentioned that he can select up his neighbor's youngster reveal in his condo. He figures that they may be able to hear them as good so they make sure they on no account say anything in entrance of the reveal. Howard stated that one time a listener known as in and stated that he had heard Stuttering john on the cell with any one so he known as in and repeated the dialog verbatim. Jackie did not find out about that and he was the one on the other finish of the cell. Howard pointed out how Gary was once treated quite poorly through this woman at NBC when he worked for her. Gary mentioned that she used to yell at him always however she'd on no account curse over the 2-manner radio. Gary said someday he got a phone name from a man who mentioned he might hear those conversations and Gary should tell her to head fuck herself. Gary stated that it can be best that anyone knows how he is getting yelled at, that way he's no longer on my own. Howard said that NBC would go through this entire factor to make it seem like that woman was doing news reports when it was once sincerely Gary feeding her information from the station. In addition they talked concerning the humans they'd who would volunteer to name in the traffic knowledge again then. Stuttering John got here in and mentioned it was quite weird to have humans telling them about conversations they've had on their cordless phones. Gary said that he heard a narrative about Madonna that used to be apparently unfold after men and women heard her speaking on a cordless phone. Gary had another story to inform as well. He tried to sell an apartment but he wasn't in a position to promote it so he sublet it out to a girl. He stated that h. Penile Size Chart Queen rented it out to this woman and went over to determine it out to scrub it up. He requested the girl if he could have his cleaning lady over there. She mentioned that was nice so he despatched her there. She stated that he known as the woman to go away a message forgetting that his cleaning woman was once there. Then the cleaning woman picked up and instructed him how messy it used to be there. He informed her he knew that and that's why she was once there, the lady was a pig. Then he heard the answering laptop squeal and realized that the woman was once going to listen to the answering machine message. He acquired a call from her later laughing telling him that she'd heard the message. Debbie Gibson And Kreskin Discussions. 10/27/1997. 8:05am Howard said they asked Debbie Gibson to do the exhibit however they desired her to do a music parody for them. They came up with a track parody referred to as ''Candle in my C**t.'' He performed the music and explained that she failed to want to do it. He stated they're writing much more songs for her now given that she did not want to do that one. He stated she fairly desires to come back in however on her own phrases. He said that he is aware of what's higher for her than even she does so that's why he is no longer letting her come in except she sings this sort of songs. He stated this is the only method she's going to be equipped to vary her picture. Howard played a new Crackhead Bob history second. This one was once Bob as a bus driver and an air traffic controller. Howard took a phone name after that. The caller requested how he could get in on this show they may be doing on Friday. Howard said they had been going to head out trick or treating but things don't seem to be figuring out very well for that. He said that they have got this bus that they may be able to use to go round doing that however there are a lot of things that would intrude with the broadcast. He mentioned he gave up on that inspiration after hearing the entire negatives. He stated he thinks that other suggests do this stuff always and he's considering that it can be all about money. Howard stated that he doesn't wish to pre-tape the occasion, he wants it to be live.

The caller asked about the factor they may be doing with Kreskin later this week. He stated that Kreskin is going to return in and have some guest channel the actual Sam Kinison. He said they've nothing to do with what Kreskin is planning. Howard stated he continuously notion Kreskin set that stuff up however he heard that they certainly not did. Howard said he heard that Kreskin used to be continually just right at being very observant at what individuals achieve this that is how he's been equipped to do these tricks he's achieved. Howard said he wishes to see how Kreskin pulls this whole thing off since he is thinking about it. He asked Gary to get him on the telephone so he might ask him about it. Gary tried to get him on the road so they might talk to him. Howard mentioned he'd wish to speak to Kreskin's mother considering the fact that he nonetheless lives at residence along with her. Gary said that they got an answering machine in order that they had to go away a message for him. Howard stated that they have got to get 5 people down there to the studio and he is thinking that they ought to be girls. Robin stated that they will have to have a costume contest to decide upon the winners to come in there. A caller advised Howard he labored for a television exhibit that shot a Kreskin trick one 12 months they usually had about 20 people picked at random and so they had tables flying across the room and stuff like that. The men and women had been simply picked randomly so he is now not definite how he managed to make that happen. He stated they purchased the tables, but Kreskin picked the men and women from the group. Howard said that Kreskin is letting them select the folks this time. Steve Grillo on the VH-1 trend Awards. 10/27/1997. Eight:20am Howard introduced up the VH-1 fashion awards and mentioned that Steve Grillo went down there to interview some folks. He had Steve come back in and then performed some of his interviews. Steve spoke to Montel Williams and requested him a couple of questions that he failed to reply. Howard mentioned he would not comprehend something Grillo says and he needs to be an actor. Howard goofed on Steve slightly bit about that. He stated that Steve did get a little phase in a television exhibit though. It was just a one liner in NYPD Blue. Steve said he used to be also within the film ''Silent Prey'' which he got on his own. Howard figured he was getting these elements due to the fact that of his exhibit. Howard played one more interview that Steve did with Dennis Hopper. Steve was once yelling for him to return over to him. He asked him a few questions and Hopper answered most of them no predicament. Then Steve asked Norm MacDonald some questions. Norm wondered why he acquired Steve to interview him. He mentioned he'd rather have Stuttering john. Michael Moore used to be additionally interviewed by means of Steve. He requested him to sing just a little of his favourite John Denver music and Moore sang for him. Moore wouldn't discontinue singing as Steve was asking him another questions. Steve requested Fiona Apple a question and she flipped out on him in regards to the query. Howard mentioned Grillo obtained kicked out after that so he played some audio of that. The other press humans were yelling at security to let him stay however they kicked him out anyway. Steve mentioned there rather weren't any excellent persons coming to the click room. That ended in him speakme more in regards to the part he had on NYPD Blue. His line was once ''Rope head scumbags, we've bought exits on the entrance aspect and the back.'' He mumbled through it so Howard and the fellows goofed on him about the best way he grants his traces. Howard wondered if Amy Heckerling used to be hearing all of these items on the grounds that she's a director. Director Amy Heckerling Visits. 10/27/1997. 8:30am Howard talked about one of the vital films that Amy Heckerling has directed and how high-quality a few them have been. She worked on quick occasions at Ridgemont high and Clueless that are a couple of Howard's favorites. Gary introduced Amy in a short while later. Howard mentioned he inspiration she was once some ancient girl but she's just right looking and no longer so ancient. He had her sit down and instructed her he was chubbing up seeing her. Howard requested Amy why she has Gilbert Gottfried over to her rental for dinner. She defined how she had been engaged to Bronson Pinchot for a at the same time so Howard received sidetracked talking to her about him. He asked her if he's giant in the pants. Amy simply laughed. She stated they started going out after he got here in and browse for her one time. Robin requested her if she's seen his new television show. She told them that he moved out on her one night time that she was out working on a film and hasn't obvious him due to the fact that. Howard had Gilbert Gottfried on the mobilephone so he had the 2 of them speak about why that they had dinner together. Howard figured that Gilbert was once going there seeking to get into Amy's pants. Gilbert said he was truely seeking to meet Bronson Pinchot. Howard brought up the up to date call they acquired from Amy's babysitter considering the fact that she was once so upset with the way in which Gilbert acts in front of her. Amy mentioned that Gilbert is a unwell character and it's no longer clear the place to draw the road with him. Amy mentioned that Gilbert asked her 12 year old daughter about having hair down beneath and he used the C-word describing it. Howard asked Gilbert why he would do this sort of factor to a 12 year ancient. Gilbert said he called Amy's apartment sooner or later and the babysitter acquired on the telephone first. He did an impact of her talking to him and mentioned that the daughter began laughing at her. He said that eggs it on even more. Amy mentioned she style of likes that this is happening at her home. Howard requested Gilbert if he proposal it was inappropriate to ask anything like that of a 12 yr historic. He stated he does prefer to get to know persons, so that's why he did it. Amy said that Gilbert is the sort of guy who will insult the audience until they're all gone and then stand there telling jokes to make himself laugh. She stated a guy like that isn't all there. Howard requested Amy what her daughter did when Gilbert asked all of these questions. She mentioned that she told him that his profession was once over and he used to be down to just doing Cheerios commercials. Gilbert mentioned he's had Amy's babysitter name him at three within the morning to yell at him in regards to the comments he's made in regards to the Jews. He said she'll even put the 12 12 months historic on the cellphone to yell at him too. Amy said she's sort of torn in view that she is aware of Gilbert can't help it but he is announcing it to her 12 yr ancient daughter. Gilbert stated that they've left messages on his desktop that he could not even play on the air. Gilbert stated that he can relatively upset the babysitter, Barbara, with the aid of announcing whatever lovely tame. They simply maintain getting on the cell even after he says that stuff although. Howard let Gilbert go and obtained back to Amy. He informed Steve Grillo he would go away too considering Amy wasn't going to hire him. He went on to ask Amy in regards to the film Clueless and the way that all came about. She informed Howard that she wrote the film just so she could get some thing made. She stated she had to provide you with

anything rather glad so that is the movie she came up with. Howard instructed her that it was once probably the most funniest films out there and he cannot suppose she got here up with it. He requested if she had something to do with the tv exhibit. She stated she used to be worried the primary year but after that she was out. She mentioned she particularl. Penile Size Chart Queen appreciated Alicia Silverstone for the phase. Howard requested he. Penile Size Chart Queen if she has a moustache. She mentioned it is just the shape of her mouth, it is now not a moustache. Howard stated it quite gave the impression of she had one in the Batman film she was in. Howard asked Amy how long it takes to put in writing a film like Clueless. She mentioned it took about three months. She additionally mentioned how she bought worried with ''quick times at Ridgemont high.'' Howard stated she have got to be particularly proficient and he's very impressed together with her. He requested her who she had the kid with. She stated it used to be a guy who wrote ''Police Academy.'' Howard mentioned that he is impressed with these power couples which can be available in the market. Howard told Amy concerning the time Gilbert was once within the health center and the one visitors he had had been him and Robin. He stated no person within the press picked up that he was within the clinic even though Gilbert was afraid they were going to. After months of no press Gilbert asked him to say anything on the air so probably any person would take observe. Howard stated he despatched some persons like dice and Belzer to go consult with Gilbert but Belzer just sat there and browse the paper even as he used to be there. Howard stated Gilbert requested him to get a thermometer for him that learn digitally. He places on his general voice when he makes calls like that so Howard was doing an affect of that. He mentioned Gilbert bought all philosophical with him when he proposal he used to be demise. Howard said he wondered what Gilbert was once going to do if he left comedy finally of that. Howard stated he had Kreskin on the mobilephone but he desired to place that off except day after today. Gary informed him it used to be principal so Howard tried to get him on the road. He wasn't having any luck in the beginning however he ultimately bought him on. Kreskin informed Howard that he used to be calling from lodges in Atlantic city and final night time he lost some cash. He stated he had 30 bucks left and went and won 21 fingers in a row which was once very uncommon. He had protection standing subsequent to him even as that was occurring. Howard failed to feel that was earth shattering news like he was once announcing it was. Gary stated Kreskin will call him and inform him news like that and it's simply significant information for Kreskin. He stated that Kreskin instructed him that it was going to make the headlines. Howard moved on and talked to Kreskin about this thing they are doing on Friday. Howard asked how many folks he wants. Kreskin wants 30 or forty humans so he can decide on from that crew. Howard said that might be nice with him and mentioned he'd get them for him. Kreskin mentioned he'll opt for a few dozen from that staff and do his trick. Kreskin said that they are going to check out and channel Sam Kinison but when they can't get him, something crazy will occur. Howard let Kreskin go and got again to Amy. He mentioned he particularly failed to know the way just right looking she was. He asked her what she's working on now. She said she's directing ''night on the Roxbury'' but Howard didn't get how they might make that right into a whole film. She said it can be honestly a very candy movie. Howard asked her if she's dating the brief man, Chris Kattan, from the movie. She requested why he would ask that and that made Howard feel that she was once. He had pulled whatever out of the and obtained it proper. She would not speak about that with him but he swore that he failed to set that up. He swore on the lifetime of his youngsters that he did not know whatever, he simply guessed at it. Robin failed to think him however he stored swearing on the lifetime of his kids that he did just wager. Howard stated he had to take a ruin and was once about to when Tom Chiusano got here in to remind him to take a break. Howard instructed him to get out and stated that he was going to do an extra hour without a break simply considering the fact that he had are available like that. He spent a number of more minutes talking to Amy about her movies and then talked to her friend Jay who was once sitting in the studio. He talked to him and learned he is been acquaintances with Amy seeing that institution. He's under no circumstances boned her though. Howard told Amy she appears very sad, like most administrators. He puzzled if she used to be on her interval today or whatever. She laughed and stated she wasn't on it but he thought she used to be mendacity about that. Howard had Amy's babysitter Barbara on the mobile after that. She mentioned that she and Amy are on the same time table for his or her intervals and she or he is aware of she's no longer on it right now. Howard was going to let her go however Gilbert was once on the phone so he saved her on. Howard let Barbara and Gilbert go at each other a little bit bit on the grounds that it was once so humorous. Gilbert said he calls the apartment and asks Barbara to put the daughter on the cellphone and he or she'll put her right on after which he'll say that he wants to ask for forgiveness and she or he'll put her back on. Then she'll ask him why he says matters like that to a 12 12 months old. Barbara was once explaining herself however Gilbert was once telling Howard concerning the things he does to her to jerk her round. He was once additionally doing an impression of her and goofing on the way she places the 12 year old proper back on the line when he asks her to. Howard mentioned that is the movie she has to make, Gilbert and Barbara doing their cellphone factor. Howard let Gilbert keep going together with his Barbara impression. He continued to make enjoyable of her so Howard asked Barbara if it's true that she appears like him. She mentioned she has his hair but that is it, she's been informed she appears like Grace Slick. Gilbert was once going somewhat too a ways along with his comments so Amy requested him to discontinue. Howard made up our minds to wrap up with Gilbert at that point however then Barbara had extra to say. He stored Gilbert on the telephone and let him goof on her accent much more. Howard and the fellows were laughing as that used to be happening. Amy's buddy Jeff was laughing lovely difficult as good. Howard instructed Amy that this was once her largest nightmare. Howard let Gilbert and Barbara go and received back to Amy. She mentioned how Bronson left her while she used to be capturing a film and he left the apartment a mess. He had gotten mad at her for some rationale and that is why he left. Howard spent a few minutes speakme about that after which wrapped up and went to business. And sooner or later. 10/27/1997. 9:25am Howard came again from spoil and mentioned how lovely Amy was once. Robin stated she observed her very fascinating too. Fred mentioned it was totally surprising to peer how lovely she was once. Jackie was announcing that he suggestion she was once sexy however he was once mumbling his traces. Howard stated he does that when he puts on his attractive voice.

Robin received into her information after that. She mentioned John Denver's dying and how it's led to his albums getting again into the top 10 album income. Howard stated he must have killed himself 20 years ago if that's the case. He instructed Jackie to do the equal and perhaps he would promote some extra records. He mentioned it might be humorous if Jackie did that and didn't sell any albums. Howard had Robin get again to her news and had her conclude up a short while later. They ended the exhibit around 10:10am (grasp Tape Theatre time). Robin's journey In Horseback driving. 10/27/ninety seven. 6:25am Robin had to be rescued from a horseback journey this weekend. She used to be out using with a buddy after they received misplaced. They had been most effective purported to be out for approximately an hour however ended up running round in circles for a different 2 hours. They have been eventually observed by using a search celebration who heard Robin's laugh through the woods. Anyone with a megaphone known as out to Robin and her buddy ''..Are you lost. '' once they heard Robin's exotic chortle. Robin also said that her horse knew his method again higher than she did. He sincerely went in a direction that Robin did not wish to go in. Way to go Blaze! New Jersey Governor Christie Whitman Calls In. 10/27/97. 7:20am Christie Whitman called in to talk to Howard for a few minutes this morning. Howard backed her in the last election and he or she gained so she ought to be coming back for his help as soon as again. Howard thinks that she's doing a best job now so he'll back her once more. She said that she'll be approaching the show in character sometime in the very near future. Lady With 3 Personalties Calls In. 10/27/97. 7:50am Jeannie chippie, writer of ''bare As We Stand'', has 3 personalities and she or he wrote about them in her e-book. Howard spoke to her about her personalities while she was once on the cell. She did not get into to much detail concerning the different 2 personalities because she doesn't be aware of precisely what they do when she's now not around. She rather did not expose some thing that great for the duration of the interview. Maybe there is extra in her guide. She stated that the guide will also be ordered from Borders guide stores. Steve Grillo at the VH-1 trend Awards. 10/27/ninety seven. 8:45am i suppose Stuttering John is laying low for a while when you consider that he gets kicked out of most everything he attends. Now Steve Grillo has been chosen because the superstar interviewer. His success is not significantly better than John's however he did get just a few interviews at the VH-1 fashion Awards which were taped this previous weekend. Grillo received interviews with Montel Williams, Dennis Hopper, Norm MacDonald, Michael Moore and Fiona Apple. The questions all appeared to be everyday's that they used for each interview. Here are just a few of them: What the dilli yo? (a reference to Busta Rhymes look and track) How lengthy does it take to get your companion able for intercourse? Can you sing just a little bit of your favourite John Denver tune? Montel Williams did not play along for long. He style of ran away after Grillo asked about the sex companion thing. Dennis Hopper played alongside just blurting out solutions. Norm MacDonald simply could not think that Grillo used to be asking the questions. He concept that he deserved a Stuttering John interview at least. He did not even answer any of the questions. Michael Moore went proper into a number of John Denver songs when requested to sing his favourite and he didn't sound half of unhealthy! Grillo requested Fiona Apple about one in every of her movies and he or she went off on one in all her rambling speeches once more similar to she did on the MTV Video song Awards show. After all of the interviews have been performed Howard had some tape of Grillo getting kicked out of the press room. People were chanting ''LET HIM stay, LET HIM keep'' nevertheless it turned out to be Doug from E! Who started the chant. By some means all of the discussion grew to become to Grillo's performing profession. He by some means obtained a one line part in ''NYPD Blue''. Howard goofed on him about that for a bit of whilst and then moved on to the Amy Heckerling interview. Director Amy Heckerling comes in. 10/27/97. 9:00am Amy Heckerling, director of such movies as ''Clueless'' and ''quick times At Ridgemont excessive'', got here in to hang out with Howard. Howard is a gigantic fan of Amy's and he used to be kissing her ass like crazy this morning. If you heard the show last week when Gilbert Gottfried used to be on you will have heard a German girl yelling at him about making fun of the holocaust. That girl is Amy's little one sitter. Amy used to have Gilbert over to her condominium for dinner and that's how Gilbert met the little one sitter. Good Howard had Gilbert on the phone once more today on account that he heard that Gilbert asked Amy's 12 yr ancient daughter if she was once developing hair where the solar don't shine. Amy's interview finally was Gilbert and the youngster sitter yelling at every different as soon as again. Howard was once laughing at Gilbert like loopy. Gilbert used to be doing his affect of the little one sitter's accent and Howard was in stitches. Finally Howard acquired faraway from the Gilbert dialog and again to Amy. He found out that she used to this point Bronson Pinchot but they just lately broke up. Now she's directing ''night time on the Roxbury''. It is situated on the Saturday night time are living sketch with the three guys who go to all of the golf equipment and jump their heads like morons. Howard said that he'd by no means suppose that a movie like that will be just right but Amy is directing it so it have got to be just right. Howard also found out that Amy is also courting Chris Katan from Saturday night live. He simply came up with the question out of nowhere and Amy did not say no to it. Howard used to be amazed by his psychic talents if you wish to name it that. -- Friday October 24, 1997 (Replayed on master Tape Theatre Marathon, Friday, November 23, 2012) -- Howard Receives duplicate Penis From ''Boogie Nights''. 10/24/97. 6:40am the guys who designed the prosthetic penis that Mark Wahlberg wears within the movie ''Boogie Nights'' came in to present Howard with a replica. The film offers with adult movies within the 1970's and Wahlberg plays a personality with a tremendous penis. The fellows from KNB results group produced a brand new prosthetic from the identical mildew used for the movie. They presented it to Howard this morning. Howard took it and stuck it in his pants to see what it might be prefer to have a huge penis. He felt proud. He was once watching in a replicate and said that he used to be now standing erect. No more hunching over. He used to be proud. He said that if he was once honestly that gigantic he'd do the exhibit with it hanging out. Ed Asner On The mobile. 10/24/97. 7:05am a number of years in the past Howard talked to Ed Asner about a guy on dying row. Ed and another celebrities have been looking to shop the man from the dying penalty for some purpose. Today Howard talked to Mr. Asner considering that the fellow he was seeking to store used to be killed through lethal injection this week. Howard sort of wanted to rub it in. Mr. Asner seems to think that Howard is evil in view that he believes in the loss of life penalty. They spoke for a bit whilst about the whole thing but there are so many small print in

regards to the case that it is difficult to keep monitor. Jenny McCarthy is available in. 10/24/97. 7:25am The beautiful but, worrying as hell Jenny McCarthy got here in this morning to plug her publication ''Jen-X'' which is in outlets now. Jenny has evaded Howard's exhibit in the past when you consider that she used to be afraid that her mother would discover about her breast implants. At the moment her mother discovered in view that she's not as dumb as Jenny notion. Jenny used to be cohost of ''Singled Out'' on MTV for a number of seasons before getting her possess show on NBC this season. And before all of that she was once a Playboy Playmate. She appeared to be a little bit bit toned down this morning. She wasn't rather as disturbing as she probably is. Howard spent about 30 minutes or so together with her talking about everything from her toilet habits to how many sex partners she's had. She turned out to be a better guest than I proposal she would. She failed to hesitate to talk about anything that Howard requested her. Jenny additionally has a sister who's a giant fan of Howard's. That sister, Lynette, known as in for the reason that Jenny was purported to deliver her to satisfy Howard. Jenny stated she has been doing so much that she didn't believe it was once a good time for her to come in. Lynette also has breast implants incidentally. Howard crammed a hell of quite a bit into the 30 minute segment. It was once overwhelming. Jenny's supervisor can also be her boyfriend. He is 49 years ancient, she's 24. Howard talked to him for a bit bit also. Many of the stuff they talked about is in the ''Jen-X'' booklet. The Mike Walker sport. 10/24/97. 8:15am No time wasted at present, they got proper to the sport given that there was once so much going down on the exhibit. Listed below are the four reports, one among which is fake. John Travolta has been upset lately seeing that he practically bought an aircraft like the one John Denver was once flying when he crashed and died. A woman who locked her keys in her automobile one evening used to be helped out via a man in a baseball cap. The man broke into her car with the oil dipstick. The girl did not comprehend who it was once except she obtained in her automobile and the sunshine shined on his face. It grew to become out to be Kevin Costner. Comedian Drew Carey was heckled by means of some guy at a comedy membership. The fellow was once kicked out but waited for Carey external. They got in a combat but when Drew tackled him to the ground the guy stated he used to be simply upset in view that he used to be having marital problems. Drew, the satisfactory guy that he's, drove the fellow dwelling. David Hasslehoff from ''Baywatch'', who's a significant song star in Germany, wants to get his singing profession going in the U.S. So he wishes his character to singing in nightclubs on the exhibit. The other producers of the exhibit say no approach. Stuttering John was enjoying in these days and he chose quantity 2 as the false story, Jackie additionally chose number 2, Robin chose 4 and Howard picked number 1. The actual false story used to be quantity 2. Tommy Lee On The cell. 10/24/97. Eight:40am Howard talked to Tommy Lee concerning the house video he recently watched. Howard was amazed by means of the stolen tape o. Penile Size Chart Queen Tommy Lee and his wife Pamela Lee. The tape was once stolen from Pam and Tommy's home now not too lengthy ago and now it can be made it is means on to the web. The tape used to be residence video shot through Tommy and Pam while doing things together including having sex. Tommy has a enormous penis and Howard may be very impressed with the size of it. In these days he called it ''The eighth surprise of the arena''. Howard spent 25 minutes speaking to Tommy concerning the tape and the way entertaining it was once. Howard thinks that it is flawed to steal some thing so personal however he could not stop observing it. He even instructed Tommy that he confirmed it to a few guys final night. Tommy mentioned that he couldn't talk much about who stole it or what's being executed about it but he's received some folks engaged on it. Tommy is out journeying with Motley Crue correct now. Pamela will likely be on the show subsequent week. Mark Harris is available in. 10/24/97. 9:20am The invariably worrying Mark Harris and his ex-boyfriend David from Germany got here in this morning. They have been imagined to participate in a few of their horrible song on the exhibit but they misplaced a cassette tape or some crap like that. David is a violinist that Mark had a brief relationship with a couple of months in the past. They're not doing that anymore and David says that he's not homosexual and he's no longer bisexual although he did do things to Mark after they met. They stated that they sleep in the equal bed even now however they do not do some thing to each other. These two can be back on November eleven to perform their horrible music so I is not going to waste any longer space writing about it today. -- Thursday October 23, 1997 -- Steve Grillo Interviews Alec 1st earl baldwin of bewdley. 10/23/ninety seven. 6:20am Howard performed tape of an interview Steve Grillo did with actor Alec 1st Earl Baldwin of Bewdley. Alec would not answer any of the questions. He just informed Steve that he would make noises to reply. Grillo requested him things like: will have to Princess Diana have punched out the paparazzi such as you did? How do you avert your brother Steve? Howard has a main issue he wants to know how can Howard prevent Steven? Alec just gave false laughs for solutions until the one about Howard avoiding Steven when it seemed like he really laughed. I am sorry if the questions are not to the phrase however I failed to get them on tape. I'm working off my horrible memory. Writer Dr. David Leiberman On The mobilephone. 10/23/ninety seven. 7:15am Dr. David Leiberman, writer of ''instantaneous analysis'' known as in to speak about his booklet. The booklet appears at matters like why men and women stare at themselves within the reflect, why they arrive early to appointments, why they misplace keys and crap like that. The ebook gave the impression to center of attention on a lot of issues that Howard has. He was interested to listen to why he did a few of these matters. At one factor within the dialog a guy known as in and stated that Dr. Leiberman is a fraud. He gave the impression very upset with the Dr. And informed Howard that he stole the recommendations for his e-book from his twin brother. Dr. Leiberman denied all of the guys claims although. The ebook is on hand in bookstores far and wide. Guy Who Will Kill His Step-Father For A personal ingredients bundle. 10/23/97. 7:45am Some man referred to as in and said that he'd be willing to kill his Baptist Minister step-father for a personal ingredients Prize package deal. He mentioned that his step-father has been getting his church to signal a petition to get Howard thrown off the air. He's no longer too pleased with that so he said he'd bump him off if Howard would provide him a confidential parts Prize bundle. Howard would not condone violence so he talked the man out of doing it but gave him one more suggestion. He told him to simply make a idiot out of the fellow in entrance of his church. The man on the cell mentioned that his step-father beats him also. Howard advised him to inform the individuals of the church that little truth to make a idiot out of him. Maybe he'll grow to be killing him anyway. Sternac The inconceivable.

10/23/ninety seven. Eight:10am Howard did his exceptional Johnny Carson affect through doing Sternac The inconceivable this morning. Al Rosenberg got here in to play the part of Ed McMahon. Sternac offers the reply first then opens an envelope to disclose the query. Right here they're: Potholes - What used to be Howard Sterns pet title for women he banged in school by means of getting them excessive? A pound of flesh - What did they to find in Marv Albert's tooth? Other halves, wives and better halves - provide three causes the howard stern show goes to ratings. Make room for daddy - What did one among Robin Quivers thighs say to the opposite? World huge net - What would a spider ought to make to quilt Oprah's ass? Denver, Colorado - identify an un-neglected people singer and an unimportant state. KKK Mart - the place will Stuttering John work after Howard Stern fires him? Meals on wheels - What do cannibals call christopher reeve? Handed the buck - What did Rosie O'Donnell do an hour after eating a whole deer? Seven Days In Tibet - What would appear shorter than a 5 minute dialogue with Fred Norris? Famous person Interviews From California. 10/23/ninety seven. Eight:45am Some guy out in California through the title of Gary went out and acquired just a few interviews for Howard. He interviewed bill Mahr, Damon Wayans and Brian of the Mark and Brian radio exhibit. Here's what he requested invoice Mahr: How are your ratings? ''excellent'' have you ever ever dated a prostitute? - ''in line with The celebrity'' were you in an auto accident? - ''No'' Who hit you with an unpleasant stick? - ''No answer'' Ouch! That last one harm. Next up was Damon Wayans: Do you sleep with white ladies? - ''No'' Would you alternatively be homosexual or sleep with Whoopi Goldberg? - ''..What are you doing tonight?'' he stated to Gary What do you suppose of Howard Stern? - ''he's an unsightly asshole who's funny at being an asshole.'' The last interview was once with Brian from the Mark and Brian show which used to compete with Howard in the la scores. They're really now not competition anymore. Gary requested one question: ''Who's the pitcher and who's the catcher?'' however Brian did not wish to reply. He has an awfully feminine voice. Penile Size Chart Queen He stated ''..Leave me on my own..'' when Gary saved after him. Howard goofed on his voice for slightly bit. Goofing On Jenny McCarthy. 10/23/ninety seven. 9:00am Jenny McCarthy is coming in day after today but Howard has been goofing on her for rather some time. Jenny is a relatively excellent looking blonde who used to be in Playboy and co-hosted MTV's ''Singled Out'' for a couple of seasons. Now she has a show on NBC. Howard pulled some audio clips from her Playboy video to play this week. At present he played some and ended up goofing on her dopey solutions. It nonetheless remains to be obvious whether she'll show up the following day. -- Wednesday October 22, 1997 (As replayed on grasp Tape Theatre - Sunday, January 11, 2009 and Sunday, December 27, 2009)-- grasp Tape Theatre - October 22, 1997. 01/11/09. 3:00 pm modern grasp Tape Theatre replay used to be from October 22, 1997. This starts a brand new season of MTT, i'm Michael i'll be protecting it for you as soon as again this year. This show was once not wholly covered in Mark's archives, so I did a full write up. (Mark's normal write up is below this one.) show opening bits include Sugar Ray's quilt of Psychedelic Bee, and a Letterman intro from Howard's look simply after personal ingredients was once launched. Howard's cold, Canadian govt Upset, World sequence Discussions. 10/22/97. Three:00 pm Howard started off the show complaining in regards to the bloodless, he acknowledged that Sam Kinison can be calling in ''reside from hell'', Gilbert Gottfried would be in, and in addition breast assessments would take situation. Howard stated he had quite a few bits today and that he desired to get to them quickly. He said he had plenty of stuff lying around. Robin acknowledged that she used to be looking at baseball late into the night final night. Howard was amazed at her lack of sleep. Howard needed to go to break after that. Howard then performed the bumper with a bunch of gospel singers singing about him. Howard acquired to Greg on the mobilephone. Greg mentioned that on Canada there's foremost discussion going on about pulling the stern show off the air. Howard was once having problems with the apparatus in the studio. Howard mentioned the CRTC (Canadian FCC) was once angry with him for pronouncing he doesn't like ''French stuff.'' He said there is already indication they are the quantity 1 show in Canada. He mentioned a piece of writing from Canada lists him as getting the absolute best grievance rely in historical past. The article went on to say that the Canadian executive is watching like it is going to no longer regulate the Howard Stern exhibit. Howard then played a music parody of Randy Newman's short persons making fun of French men and women. He said it wasn't very humorous, nevertheless it just goes to exhibit you ways so much time some people have on their fingers. The song wasn't very humorous, but Jackie used to be having a satisfactory time in the again. Howard moved on to talking about the World series and the way the rankings are low. He stated that he is serious about it and he's now not fairly a significant baseball man. Gary mentioned he used to be up late looking at it and it was simplest on the 4th inning by means of 10:30 EST. They mentioned the results of the game for a few minutes, Florida ended up winning the game the earlier night. Gary persisted to vent about how late the video games go. Howard mentioned how there may be nothing worth staying up late for and that it's a lot better to simply get some sleep. Callers need group sex. 10/22/97. 3:20 pm Howard moved on to the telephones, there was once a girl on who needs crew intercourse with more than one ladies and a couple of guys. The woman went on describing herself and then her buddy got on the cell to describe herself. Howard asked who they gave the impression of however they wouldn't say. Howard requested them to kiss each other. He said that he'd orgy with them but they mentioned they desired Fred. Howard determined it rough to believe they cannot find guys if they're as excellent looking as they say. A man referred to as in and claimed he desired to orgy with them. The women appeared interested, after which the guy provided to convey his buddy. The woman on the mobilephone said no guys she knows need to social gathering with each and every different. Howard mentioned they will have to invite guys over to observe the sport and then begin the orgy. Howard asked in the event that they seemed like Laverne and Shirley, however they claimed that one gave the impression of Jodie Foster. Howard requested them to kiss each other right then and there. Then he asked them what they were sporting. The ladies claimed to kiss however Howard failed to buy it and had them go for extra. He convinced them to check out it. The ladies then asked about sex toys to make use of on guys and Howard informed them to check out a butt plug. He hung up with them a short while later. Howard then went on to tell a story a couple of woman he used to have intercourse with 5 instances a day that said she used to be an actress. Howard mentioned they did everything to one another, even having sex

within the bath. He said one day this different lady came visiting that he had had sex with months prior to the 5 occasions a day woman and a entire bunch of folks had been in the house. People began making out and Howard's lady friend took her prime off and an orgy almost ensued, however Howard didn't wish that at all so he mentioned ''overlook it.'' Howard stated afterward he discovered this girl was relationship a guy with a gigantic penis and he or she will not speak to him anymore. Howard needed to go to break rapidly after that. Naked graphics of Celebrities, Debbie Gibson Refuses To participate in Howard's Songs. 10/22/ninety seven. Three:50 pm Howard said he likes high Society journal because they have balls printing naked images of celebrities like Pam Anderson, Elle McPhereson, Liz Hurley, Cindy Crawford, and Sharon Stone. Howard said they're fairly, relatively courageous for printing upskirt snap shots of the late Princess Diana.(She had best been useless about 2 weeks at the time of this exhibit). Jackie would barely breathe he was once having fun with the pix a lot. Howard stated they have great photographs of Farrah Fawcett. Howard said that they had been imagined to have Debbie Gibson on, he wrote some songs for her to sing considering that she wishes to vary her image. Howard said he wrote one called ''Hail To devil''. Debbie refused to do the songs. Howard said she desired to participate in her possess ''wild music'' nevertheless it was horribly non-wild. Howard said he despatched her his possess wild music for her to sing. It was once a parody of Elton John's 'Candle in the Wind' about using a candle to pleasure your self. He performed the tune and it got significant laughs. Howard couldn't feel she didn't wish to do the tune. Howard then began talking about how folks are cruelly clubbing seals in Canada once more. Howard stated any man who could membership a pup is a ''actual man.'' Howard used to be laughing about Asians who use seal penis as an aphrodisiac. Howard performs With the new Rosie O'Donnell Doll, Takes Some Calls. 10/22/97. 4:00 pm Howard had the new Rosie O'Donnell doll and he used to be taking part in clips from it and laughing at them. It had phrases akin to ''aid, my fat ass is caught in the toilet,'' and ''If i don't get 1st Baron Verulam i'll kill any one.'' each person had fun with that. Howard said they'd breast assessments developing. Howard received back to speakme in regards to the seals for somewhat bit. There used to be a caller who desired to talk about an advertiser who was gifting away breast implants or something. Neither Howard nor the woman knew precisely what it was once. Howard played a clip of a person talking about breast enhancement and expansion. Some man was on the cell performing like he knew where Howard lived and pronouncing that courtesy flushing was bad for you. The fellow mentioned that he knows Howard lives next door to a ''junkyard king.'' Howard stated the guy didn't recognize what he was speakme about and hung up on him. One more guy on the phone mentioned that his penis is smaller than Howard's. Howard mentioned he'll beat him and he's sure of it. One more caller said that the French Canadians are nuts. Howard mentioned he had plenty to speak about including these black speak indicates on at night time now. Howard questioned the place he would to find some seal penis. He mentioned they employed Sinbad to take over this Vibe exhibit. Robin said Sinbad lied to them when he was once on, telling them he'd never do a speak show. Howard said he's a funny man and at least he can do a monologue. Robin said Vibe is unimaginable to watch. Howard went to interrupt after that. Breast Examinations. 10/22/ninety seven. Four:25 pm They got here again from break and had the women there for the breast assessments are available. One woman stated she is an ''H cup''. She mentioned she has to put on two bras when she does aerobics. She explained the method, she places on a smaller bra and then a greater one on high of it. She said they are wholly ordinary. Howard stated she's not a heavy lady but she might be incorrect for one. Howard went to the opposite woman and he or she stated she's an ''E''. Howard couldn't decide who to compare first. Howard went to the H cup lady first. Jackie mentioned they are higher than footballs. Howard had Gary come over to help him examine. Howard and Gary persisted to massage after which finally moved on to the subsequent girl. Howard desired Robin to come over and feel the breasts but she wasn't . The first lady stated lets her husband have sex with one other woman and informed her story. She mentioned she's been wither her husband 7 years and has children with him. She said she's exceptional with letting him have intercourse with an extra lady so long as he has intercourse along with her first. She mentioned it used to be a hygiene challenge. Sam Kinison Calls In From Hell. 10/22/97. Four:50 pm They came again from smash with a clip of loopy Alice combating with a person on the telephone. Howard had ''Sam Kinison'' on the mobilephone. The function of Kinison was played via Craig Gass. He talked to the Kinison impressionist for somewhat bit and made some jokes about lately lifeless men and women like Versace and Princess Di. The call didn't final very lengthy. Howard began discussing Ann Rice's conception about how very few souls ever get to heaven, and that satan created hell as a situation for souls to move. She claims that hell is just a place of lost souls and now not rather fireplace and brimstone. Quite a lot of news reviews and Callers. 10/22/97. 5:00 pm Howard discussed a number of reports at the high of the news including the tribute to Princess Diana with Peter Gabriel. He said they must be having a tribute for Peter instead. Howard pulled the string on the Rosie doll just a few extra occasions. Then he had a girl on the telephone who wanted to try lesbianism for her husband. She desired advice on luring females. Howard advised her to go to a strip membership along with her husband and opt for out a stripper. The girl didn't look keen about that suggestion. One man was once on the cellphone and he mentioned he and his friend caught chlymidia from two chicks after pretending to be the Jesus Twins at a local bar. The subsequent caller had her radio up. Howard saved telling her to turn her radio the entire manner up. She had it on in the background when he picked up on her. Howard was really enjoying messing together with her. She saved turning it up like a dope. She stated she had an affair and desires to know if she's going to hell. Howard nearly received her to admit that the man she cheated on her husband with was once better than her husband. Howard talked together with her somewhat even as about having affairs. A guy referred to as in and mentioned he was once black, Howard goofed on him for a few minutes before announcing they had to go to interrupt. Howard took a couple of more calls first although, a girl asking about Tom. Howard made enjoyable of Tom pronouncing he wasn't that bright, and a few girl mentioned possibly Tom was once having sex together with his golf clubs. The final caller tried to do a joke however failed. Howard went to break after that. Playboy Video Clips. 10/22/ninety seven. 5:20 pm when they got here back from spoil, Howard performed a clip of a Playboy video. He mentioned that it was terrible pornography and it grew to become him off. He

mentioned they have them doing all kinds of stuff like shooting bullseye's whilst riding horses. It is not very porn-like. The subsequent clip had a lady giving her sob story about how hard her moms and dads worked and her complete lifestyles, in the next scene she was once dancing around nude. Howard and Jackie goofed on her for a few minutes. The following woman was speakme with a Chicago accent and Fred performed the ''SHUT UP!'' sound effect over her. Gilbert Gottfried comes in. 10/22/ninety seven. 5:25 pm Howard stated he had Gilbert coming in. Robin said she saw him at a free movie ultimate. Howard mentioned that there was no label on Gilbert's water because E! Desired to feel like an actual network. Gary stated that Gilbert ripped it off. Gilbert said he was once determining at it. Robin stated it used to be awkward seeing Gilbert out in public. She mentioned they had been a row far from each and every other. Howard mentioned his worst nightmare is trying to calm down after which seeing Gilbert. Gilbert said Robin used to be staring at the reveal the entire time, even 1/2 an hour before the movie began. The lights were up and she or he was once ignoring him. Howard mentioned Gilbert goes to the entire events for free food. Howard mentioned that Gilbert indicates up 2 hours early for the free food and a risk to meet females. Howard said Gilbert's plate is constantly loaded, he goes back several times and brings a pup bag. Jackie stated Gilbert was once on a tv show with him known as ''The Watcher'' that used to be a real bomb. They let the actors go to the entrance of the line to get steaks. Gilbert and Jackie got to reduce to the front and there were dozens of humans out there waiting, and Gilbert obtained two, slowing down the system much more. He said he ended up not even consuming the second one. Howard had a girl on the mobilephone who stated she met Gilbert in a restaurant and he tried to decide upon her up. She mentioned Gilbert's older than her and agreed he isn't sizzling. Gilbert said he appears like Goldfinger instead of Sean Connery. They stated Gilbert is one hundred fifty% Jewish. The girl on the mobilephone stated he supplied her free tickets to his live performance for her number. She gave him her quantity and he referred to as asking if she wanted to meet him. She lied and informed him she was on the other line and asked if she would have his quantity. He stated he'd call her again and Gilbert did not stop. She needed to have her roommate answer and lie for her. Then her brother referred to as her doing a Gilbert impression. She mentioned that Melrose Larry green and Ratso Sloman wouldn't discontinue calling her both. Howard mentioned that Melrose and Larry speak to each other and Melrose has money. So Melrose takes Larry to dinner and Larry tells Gilbert there is free dinner. The 2 of them hook up and take Melrose's dinner. Gange and Gary got here in to become a member of in on the fun, bashing Gilbert some more. Some lady offered to take Gilbert out to lunch and he known as her back consistently asking her when it will be due to the fact that he wanted intercourse. That girl that says she's Gilbert's daughter referred to as in. She wasn't making experience and she or he used to be tough to listen to. Gilbert stated the girl's been calling his agent, the television shows, the papers. Subsequent on the cellphone was once the Holocaust lady once more. She's nonetheless upset with Gilbert for making fun of the Holocaust. She made enjoyable of him and attacked him. She instructed him she wishes he'd commit suicide. Gilbert saved going with the Holocaust jokes and the lady got upset. She said that God is punishing Gilbert considering that he will get no work. They endured to fight for a few minutes. She mentioned given the option between Gilbert and a Nazi she'd select a Nazi. Gilbert requested her if she'd instead sleep with him or drive with Princess Di. She wasn't gonna answer that although. The woman said she talked to Henry Winkler about her mother and father. Gilbert asked if he gave her the thumbs up and mentioned,''Eeeeeh!'' Gilbert requested if she told it to Laverne and Shirley too. Gilbert informed her to yell,''HOGAAAAAAN!'' he stored making Holocaust jokes and bought the lady angry. That persevered for roughly 15 minutes and then she hung up. It failed to end there though. The subsequent guy on the telephone stated Gilbert tried to prefer up his spouse. An extra guy referred to as in and said Gilbert tried to bang his mother in excessive college. That man became out to be a false. The last man said Gilbert picked up his possess tip. That one they had the toughest time believing. Grillo came in and stated his buddy dated Gilbert for a even as and Gilbert mentioned she was once fairly hot, but it was once a turn off that she'd banged Grillo. More With Gilbert and Ratso. 10/22/ninety seven. 6:20 pm Larry Ratso Sloman was once on the telephone. Howard said that Larry bought a house for some huge cash despite the fact that it wasn't a valuable residence. Gilbert stated that he used to be at a occasion with Ratso. There was once just a little woman with out teeth consuming closely. Gilbert was once screaming at the occasion. Larry stated he's certainly not seen Gilbert buy a beer on the other hand he tried a prank on him. He informed him he had no cash for the cab after they received out and Gilbert grew to become white. Then he took out crumpled up greenback costs from his pocket. There used to be a man on the cellphone that said he was continue to exist the scene of a shoot out with police, it turns out he wasn't though. Robin's information With Gilbert. 10/22/97. 6:35 pm Robin began off her information, Gilbert used to be still goofing around about Ratso. Her first story was once about incestuous siblings that misplaced custody of their child. The subsequent story used to be concerning the World sequence. Howard asked Gilbert if he watches baseball. He said ''no.'' He couldn't even name a participant or what number of guys are on a crew. Gilbert used to be making fun of himself for a few minutes then he went into ''Who's On First''. Robin mentioned she'd prefer to get out of their sometime at present, however Gilbert was going to make certain that did not occur. Robin tried to continue her news however Gilbert saved making fun of Ratso. Gilbert was once having fun with himself. Robin's subsequent story used to be a couple of woman shedding custody of her kids for the reason that she's hooked on the internet. Court records say she spends all her time locked in a room with a pc, away from her kids. The youngsters will receive to the father. Howard mentioned there are persons within the chat rooms all day and night time. Robin tried to continue with the news once once more, and Gilbert obtained into his impressions. He did Dracula Gottfried and had everyone cracking up within the studio. Robin's subsequent story was once about two women who wrote a music about homosexuality known as, ''not ordinary''. Robin mentioned they'll sing it in Philly on the ''Million girl March''. Then she had a story about Stevie wonder singing at the funeral of his favourite driver. Gilbert did Dracula Gottfried for a couple of minutes making fun of that. The subsequent story was once about Dennis Rodman asking for more money from the Chicago Bulls. Howard asked Gilbert if he's ever finished Vibe with Keenan Ivory Wayans. He stated it can be the one black exhibit he hasn't carried out. Gilbert

started doing his Carson impact and making enjoyable of Keenan. Her final reports were about invoice Cosby getting a new exhibit on CBS. Gilbert did his bill Cosby affect for a few minutes. The subsequent was about Johnny Rotten successful his courtroom case. The very final was about Roman Polanski looking to get again within the nation. They finished up a short while later. -- Wednesday October 22, 1997 (Mark's fashioned write up) -- Two Breast melanoma Examinations. 10/22/ninety seven. 7:50am Howard obtained to put his arms on four extra breasts at present. Two ladies confirmed up at present to have Howard supply them breast melanoma exams. One lady was once 4'8'' tall with H-Cup breasts! The other used to be 5'10'' with E-Cup's! Howard had greater than a handful at present. Each person in the studio was amazed by using the H-cups. Sarah, the H-cup, mentioned that her breasts are usual, not implants like the opposite woman's. Kim, the E-cup, used to have C-cups unless she got implants to blow them as much as E. Kim is a stripper. Sarah was first as much as have her breasts examined. Howard mentioned ''they're unbelievable!'' when she took off her shirt. Jackie used to be amazed just with the aid of the size of her bra. It used to be giant. They mentioned it gave the look of two soccer helmets. Howard used to be having a hell of a time examining Sarah so Gary bought in on the enjoyable. Sarah mentioned that she failed to intellect having Gary support. Howard saved discovering lumps in her breasts however there is so much there that it normally wasn't cancer. Kim was up next and Howard said she had really high-quality implants. He needed to give her a certain examination for the reason that she has implants. Kim informed him that he had to style of ''pop up'' her implant to be capable to consider across the whole breast. After examining Kim Howard requested Robin to come over and suppose the breasts. Robin refused to do it. Sam Kinison Calls In From Hell. 10/22/ninety seven. 8:30am every once in a even as a cell line falls on the grave of the late comic Sam Kinison so he's equipped to call the exhibit. If you happen to don't consider that then a comic who does an amazing influence of Sam calls in as Sam Kinison From Hell. Sam known as in and talked a bit of bit about lady Di and Gianni Versace being down there in Hell. He stated that when Versace arrived in hell the only factor he stated was once ''seem what this man did to my go well with!''. Sam did not want to talk too much concerning the dying of woman Diana but he did stated that Dodi Fayed has cheated on Diana with 3 of Sam's ex-girlfriends. He additionally stated that there is one excellent factor to come out of the loss of life of woman Di. He stated that he has ''. One kick ass limo driver..''. Sam's connection was once misplaced quickly after that. The voice of Sam Kinison from Hell is played by means of comedian Craig Gass from Seattle. Gilbert Gottfried is available in. 10/22/97. 9:20am comedian Gilbert Gottfried got here in to hang around for the duration of the information. As normal when Gilbert is available in there were tons of poor telephone calls coming in. Howard have to have taken eight or 10 calls from persons who've either dated Gilbert or have noticeable him doing something unusual. One lady who referred to as in the final time Gilbert used to be on referred to as in once more today. She was on the telephone yelling at Gilbert for approximately 25 minutes or so. Gilbert had made some jokes in regards to the holocaust when she drove him to some social gathering. She just finds him horrible and unfunny so Howard let her vent on him today. Gilbert simply maintains making fun and laughing through the entire factor. Yet another lady who known as within the final time Gilbert used to be on called in at present. She claims to be Gilbert's daughter. She's 30 years historic and Gilbert is in his mid 40's or so. He would had been about 15 or so when she used to be born but she mentioned that he's the father. She even mentioned that she lived with him when she was once 7 years old. Gilbert mentioned that she's been calling his agent and even the USA community the place he works. She's like a stalker or anything. Gilbert is great when he is available in. He maintains every person laughing by means of the whole news segment. He simply makes silly comments and does his Dracula affect. He failed to disappoint at present. It used to be regular laughs for the period of the entire news section. -- Tuesday October 21, 1997 -- 15 yr old Caller Who Can Fart by using Pounding His Ass. 10/21/ninety seven. 6:35am A 15 year old child known as in and said that he could fart through pounding on his butt. He confirmed his skill on the mobilephone for Howard and it labored. Stuttering John said that the kid instructed him that he can select up girls with this amazing talent. Howard mentioned that he needs that he would fart on command so he wanted to try out the system. What the child is absolutely doing is pounding air into his butt together with his hand. He will get down on his knees and elbows and kilos the air in. Howard gave it a try but wasn't effective. He tried it a couple of times nevertheless it just failed to work for him. Howard wants the kid to come right down to the studio however he lives in Michigan. Listening to Howard trying this used to be rather humorous. With a bit of luck it will make it to E!. Katarina The Swedish Broadcaster. 10/21/97. Eight:00am 28 12 months ancient Katarina, a Swedish broadcaster, came in to meet Howard this morning. She's within the States on vacation and he or she heard about Howard's movie so she got here in. She was once relatively excellent watching in keeping with Howard. Howard decided to have a little enjoyable along with her so he brought in Steve the Engineer (a.Ok.A. ''wooden Yi'') to play the role of Michael Jordan of CBS broadcasting. ''wood Yi'' performed the phase good. Jackie ought to have been feeding him his lines whilst he used to be standing there given that he certain as hell wasn't rehearsed. He would ask Katarina to do things like sit down on his hand or tell her to ''F-Off''. It was very pleasing. Salt & Pepa are available. 10/21/97. 8:35am female rappers Salt & Pepa came in to plug their new album ''brand New''. Their DJ Spindarella used to be additionally there. Howard has had a fascination with Pepa for rather a at the same time now. He's on the whole stated that he'd wish to ''bang'' her after seeing her in a few of their videos. It turns out that Salt has turn out to be an extraordinarily religious man or woman and she'd prefer to doing ''inspirational'' documents rather of rap files. I am sorry, she says that she's now not devout however she has ''..A private relationship with God..''. Spindarella mentioned that after she retires she's going to become a Masseuse. Howard could not think what he used to be hearing. He was questioning why a excellent looking, famous rapper would want to go into a job like that. She simply enjoys doing it so she'll make it her career. Howard played a number of seconds of their new single ''Are You ready'' and took a few mobile calls earlier than ending the interview. Salt's sister known as her on her cell cell to tell her to calm down just earlier than they left. It was just a little too late but as a minimum she tried. Different Happenings On The show. (Contributed by means of Don From Michigan) 10/21/97. 9:30am Fred Norris needed to leave the exhibit early for some filming of the movie "LuLu (not sure of spelling) On The Bridge" in

which he's showing. Howard then went on to take mobile calls from listeners. Subject matters mentioned integrated: Howard's frustration with some interpretations of Canada's Hate Speech laws. The irony of KEGL-FM "The Eagle" in Dallas being bought via Nationwide insurance after canceling his show during the short period wherein they owned it. Howard's plans to sue for racketeering the man or woman whose identify seems on the letter being circulated via the American loved ones organization. He objects to their letters to customers of his radio affiliates encouraging them to withhold their promoting industry. Maria Returns. 10/20/97. 7:05am The nutty girl who called in for the duration of the news last Friday was on the phone again in these days. She was simply as wacky as last week. She still thinks that Robert Redford and Robert Urich are out to kill her. This time her husband used to be home so Howard received the danger to speak to him. But before that Howard had Fred name in as Robert Redford to check out and straighten the woman out. No good fortune there. The husband pointed out her slightly bit. He revealed that they have got 4 daughters and that they have been married for 35 years. He stated that the dilutions began about 29 years ago! He still sticks with her though. He mentioned that she used to be pretty excellent watching once they bought married and so they've each been devoted to each other so he sticks along with her. Howard invited her to come right down to the station so we will have to be listening to from her within the near future. Howard instructed Maria that they'd have Robert Redford down to meet her.. He later stated that perhaps they'd put a paper bag over Fred's head and get in touch with him Robert Redford. David Lee Roth is available in. 10/20/ninety seven. 7:35am Former Van Halen lead singer David Lee Roth got here in to plug his new publication ''crazy From The warmth'' in these days. He and Howard talked a few bunch of unique subjects from the publication. Listed below are just a few examples:Dave once had 5 ladies in a room having intercourse, Dave got here up with the title for the band, he used to get on his arms and knees to scrub the stage, he hasn't slept with a lot of famous persons, he used to pay his roadies to prefer out excellent watching females for him to meet, his track ''just like Paradise'' was almost the theme tune for ''Beverly Hills 90210''. Howard also took some phone calls for Dave. One guy requested Dave if he'd work with the Van Halen boys again at some point. He mentioned that he would but it would be underneath more managed conditions. Dave also has a finest hits album out with a brand new single called ''do not Piss Me Off''. The Billboard Awards Nightmare. 10/20/97. 8:40am Howard was nominated for some Billboard Award for fine syndicated talk show host or anything like that. He obtained an invitation however failed to want to go. The plan was to ship Hank the under the influence of alcohol dwarf all the way down to take delivery of just in case Howard won. Good it didn't happen that means. Mike Gange and Doug from E! Went all the way down to Orlando Florida to film the awards. Hank was once supposed to fly down Friday night from Boston. Hank confirmed up on the airport so drunk that they would not let him on the airplane. Then he lost his ticket so Gange had to buy him a further. To make a long story slightly shorter, Hank by no means made it down to Orlando. Gange and Doug needed to find a alternative. They discovered a Hawaiian Tropic mannequin who would go up and show her breasts in front of the group if Howard had been to win. They had a pleasant speech for her to read. Well Howard won the award so Cheryl the model went as much as get the award however she didn't learn her speech. She simply mentioned something like ''Howard rules'' and ran off. The some significant fat man received up on stage in his underwear and began yelling all kinds of crap. Howard would barely hear what was on the tape due to the fact that of some difficulty with the tape participant at present. He had each Hank and Cheryl on the mobile throughout most of this. After the massive fat man began his yelling crap Cheryl made her means again to the stage and read her speech and showed her breasts. It was once all one enormous mess. Dialogue About Breeding Animals. 10/20/97. 9:45am it began with one phone name. A guy wanted to inform Howard about how he had his dog's sperm frozen so he would use it at some point to breed pups. That wasn't the unusual section though. It was once the best way that the veterinarian will get the sperm. They ought to ''manipulate'' the canine's wiener and accumulate sperm similar to a human would do. The guy stated it was lovely unusual to look it going on. That telephone call resulted in others about persons who have gathered sperm from such animals as pigs, cows, horses and even whales! Each one has an additional technique for collecting the little fellows. The guy with the pig story said that they insert some sort of electrical rod into the pigs ass and shock him into donating his present. There definite is some wacky crap occurring out there. One other Breast cancer examination. 10/20/97. 9:55am Howard did a quick breast melanoma exam on a lovely 25 year ancient by means of the title of Jackie today. He needed to make it quick due to the fact he had to get to the news. Bad Jackie had been ready to get on the exhibit considering 4am! She got here down from Buffalo just to satisfy Howard and let him touch her breasts. The fact is she stated she didn't rather care about the cancer examination, she simply desired him to contact her breasts! It's mighty what repute can do for a man isn't it? Understand that, Howard didn't find any lumps in her breasts. Scott The Engineer Given Proclamation From Councilman. 10/17/97. 7:10am A metropolis councilman from Seven Hills Ohio got here in to present Scott The Engineer with some Proclamation thanking him for having a bet in opposition to Cleveland in the baseball playoffs. Scott misplaced the bet so Cleveland is heading to the arena sequence. The 24 12 months historical Councilman, David Bentowsky, offered the object to Scott. Ponce De LaPhone Phony telephone Calls. 10/17/ninety seven. 7:15am Howard played tape of three new phony cell calls that Ponce made. They have been first-rate as natural. Ponce uses tape from the exhibit as a substitute of his own voice. The three that Howard played included the voices of Hank the inebriated dwarf, timber Yi and Kirk Douglas pronouncing ''What are you announcing?''. Ponce continues getting higher and better. Cell call To Fred's mom About sex. 10/17/97. 7:40am the opposite day Howard spoke to Jackie's mom about oral sex and different stuff. Today it was Fred's mom's flip. Howard gave her a name and found out that she is the most open mom of them all. Howard first spoke to Fred's step-father in regards to the subject. He let every body understand that they had accomplished that stuff and might be still do. Fred's mother tested it. She mentioned that they're very completely satisfied. Tori Spelling is available in. 10/17/97. 7:50am Tori Spelling came in to plug a film that she's in known as ''The house Of sure''. It is no longer a television movie this time. It's an actual movie to be able to be launched next week around the nation. Robin noticed it and mentioned it was once beautiful just right. Howard spent most of the interview asking Tori about how her

day goes. He asked the whole lot from when she wakes up unless she goes out after work. He additionally took some cell calls from nutty listeners. One man called in and said that he'd skateboard naked around the block simply to meet Tori. Howard instructed him to come back down but he certainly not did make it. A couple of different callers brought out the fact that Tori introduced her brother to a strip club for his birthday and had a lap dance for herself! Her brother is beneath age so she did not wish to talk about it too much considering the fact that she used to be afraid that her father and mother would find out about it. Howard said that he used to be hypnotized via Tori's breasts the whole time she was once there. The Mike Walker game. 10/17/ninety seven. Eight:50am No superstar contestants in these days with the Mike Walker recreation. It was handiest Howard, Robin and Jackie enjoying. Fred was a contributor for the game so he sat out. Listed below are this week's four reviews: Farrah Fawcett demanded that she get to keep some place of business furniture that was used for anything she used to be involved with. The furniture was once connected to the wall so she demanded that it's ripped out. They did become purchasing her a brand new wall unit. Maria Schriver freaked out lately when she found long hairs in her brush. It became out to be doll hair. Her daughter had brushed her dolls hair with the comb. When a women room door was locked in a California restaurant for an extended period of time the supervisor demanded for the person to come out. When the door opened it was Jim Belushi with a newspaper and cigar in hand. He said the guys's room was busy. The individuals of Fleetwood Mac have already began combating once more and have said that there'll not ever be an extra reunion once more. Jackie selected story three because the false, Howard selected number 2 but changed his option to number 1 and Robin picked number three because the false. The actual false story used to be number 4. Animated Marv Albert song. 10/17/ninety seven. 9:20am any one despatched Howard some variety of pc animation of Marv Albert that goes along with the Marv Albert track parody ''yesterday'' that they had on the exhibit now not too lengthy ago. He performed it for Robin and mentioned that he'd wish to get it on E!. Howard mentioned that it was once first-rate. Richard Belzer Sits In throughout The news. 10/17/ninety seven. 9:25am comic Richard Belzer came in to hang around for the duration of the information. His exhibit ''homicide'' has it is season top-rated tonight. Earlier than they did the information though a lady called in who claimed that she was afraid that she's going to be murdered. When Howard started asking the lady who was once going to kill her she stated that Robert Redford and Robert Urich had been out to get her for some bizarre rationale. Howard performed along with her for rather a whilst. It was simply style of sad seeing that this girl was once wholly screwed up. Howard tried to get in contact with the lady's daughter and her husband however they didn't have any luck. -- Thursday October 16, 1997 -- Howard Talks about the Tommy & Pamela Lee Video. 10/sixteen/ninety seven. 6:30am Howard obtained a videotape in the mail of Tommy Lee and his spouse Pamela Lee having sex and doing a bunch of different matters. Howard mentioned it was the sexiest thing he is visible. It seems that the tape was once residence video that Pam and Tommy made together nevertheless it used to be stolen and circulated all over the position. Howard spent really somewhat of time speakme about bits and pieces of the tape. He made it sound just like the tape used to be 2 hours long but because it turns out it is handiest like halfhour. Later in the morning Howard found out that the tape is to be had on the web for like $forty or $50. He wouldn't supply out the URL due to the fact he does not believe it can be correct to promote that form of stuff without their permission. Girl comes in To eat Cake Out Of Fred's Ass. 10/16/ninety seven. 7:25am This woman had called within the other day about consuming cake out of Jackie's ass for a personal parts Prize package deal. Jackie failed to wish to do it so Fred was next on the list. Her identify was Linda and he or she's 36 years historical. Howard stated she looks 46. She got here on this morning and it seems that she looks style of like Jackie! Howard said she had rather satisfactory breasts though. Earlier than she ate the cake she desired Howard to provide her a breast exam but he became her down. She seemed to scare everyone in the studio. When she in the end did consume the cake out of his ass everyone in the room was going nuts. Howard later said that she was looking to pull Fred's pants down while eating the cake. It need to were a hell of a website. Fred has a exceptional ass in line with Howard by the way. Lynyrd Skynryd Drummer Tells Story Of Survival. 10/sixteen/ninety seven. 8:25am This guy Artimus Pyle was once one of the crucial survivors of the aircraft crash that killed one of the individuals of the band Lynyrd Skynrd. He told the story about how the airplane ran out of gasoline on the way to Baton Rouge, Louisiana and the way they crashed right into a swamp. He managed to crawl out of the wreckage and found a condominium. As he bought to the apartment though the owner proposal the fellow used to be a thief or anything and shot him! It wasn't unhealthy enough that he'd simply been in a airplane crash, some dumb ass shoots him. 6 of the 26 on board died. Two of them have been the pilot and co-pilot. The man used to be lovely cool for coming on and telling the story. Later in the exhibit a guy referred to as in and said that Artimus had been thrown in penitentiary for raping a 4 12 months ancient or some thing like that. Howard had Gary get Artimus back on the phone to discover what it used to be all about. Artimus explained that it all had to do with custody of his child. He mentioned it had whatever to do with his female friend getting out of the relationship and utilizing a baby molestation story to do it. He failed to supply all of the small print so it was once variety of tough to determine it out. This man has been by way of a hell of a number of crap in his lifestyles huh? Howard offers Breast melanoma exam To Black girl. 10/16/97. 9:10am This was the primary black woman to return in for a breast melanoma exam from Howard. She had small breasts but Howard nonetheless appeared to enjoy the examination. He mentioned that she looked like any one out of countrywide Geographic magazine. She had some style of marks on her breasts that she was involved about. Howard said they seemed like cigarette burns or zits on her one breast. He told her to have them checked by a medical professional. Yet a different effective breast exam by way of Dr. Stern. Daniel Carver's film assessment Of ''Booty name''. 10/16/ninety seven. 9:15am KKK member Daniel Carver was on the cellphone to give his overview of the film ''Booty name'' He gave it 2 nooses out of 5. He said that it was once funny but it surely was once all black propaganda. He said he'd alternatively see a Steve Martin movie or whatever like that. -- Wednesday October 15, 1997 -- Steve Grillo Interviews Jonathan Harris. 10/15/97. 6:45am Howard performed tape of an interview Steve Grillo did with Jonathan Harris. He is the guy who played Dr. Smith in the historic television sequence ''lost In space''. The good healthcare professional performed together with the few questions

that Grillo requested. Before playing the tape though, Howard used to be speaking about how dumb Grillo is on account that he dropped out of college after going for six years. He most effective had an additional semester to conclude but he dropped out since he had to take 2 semesters of a overseas language. Howard offers Breast melanoma examination. 10/15/97. 7:30am In realization of breast melanoma cognizance month Howard has decided to offer free tests to any ladies who need them. The primary lady to exhibit up was once Patricia or Trish as she known as herself. She's a excellent watching stripper who did not hesitate to take off her high to have Howard do the exam. Trish has breast implants so it was just a little extra elaborate to do the exam. Howard was once explaining what he was doing so ladies at house might investigate themselves for melanoma. Howard kept announcing that this wasn't erotic for him however I think we all know that's false. He sincerely felt this girl up and admitted it. He definite does not get to believe up strangers breasts some other way except when he does the painting O' the golf green for St. Patricks Day or when he paints breasts like Easter eggs during Easter. K, so he does get to feel up ladies's breasts relatively a little bit. Howard said that Trish used to be excited with the aid of all of this. We'll have to expect that he supposed her nipples have been erect. I believe Howard used to be looking to play this straight in order that they could show this on tv like they do when an actual physician is doing it for a information software. Don't rely on it taking place though. Howard Talks To Jackie's mom About sex. 10/15/97. 8:15am no longer too lengthy in the past Howard was questioning if Jackie's mother, being the laid back variety of character she is, had ever let her husband within the back door to be able to communicate. He sooner or later made the mobilephone name to her this morning and requested her about it. She mentioned that again in her day they simply did not do matters like that. She even mentioned that she certainly not gave her husband oral sex. Howard also spoke to Gary's mom about the identical area. Gary's mother said the same thing. She not ever gave her husband oral sex. It just wasn't the right factor to do. Later in the exhibit a sixty eight year historical lady known as in and stated that she thinks ladies did that stuff again then but they just don't prefer to talk about it. The lady mentioned that she gave her guys oral sex but did not particularly talk about it. She wasn't talking for the moms of Gary and Jackie however it's possible that they simply do not need to talk about it. We may under no circumstances comprehend the reality. David Duchovny comes in. 10/15/ninety seven. Eight:40am Actor David Duchovny got here in to plug his new movie ''enjoying God'' in these days. David is without doubt one of the stars of ''The X-records'' on Fox. We found out that David is an extraordinarily smart guy. He graduated from Princeton university and went on to Yale to get his masters. The subject of the SAT checks got here up even before David got here into the studio but they discovered that he bought a score of 1320 on his 2nd try. David said that he thought Howard used to be superb in ''confidential materials''. He concept Fred was once even higher. Howard particularly thinks incredibly of David's new wife Tea Leoni. They talked about her for a little at the same time. David pointed out how they got collectively. They were offered by way of their agent. Howard additionally took some cell calls from some wacky listeners. David put some rumors to rest. One guy idea that the X-records movie was once a rumor however it's no longer just a rumor, they completed filming it this summer season and it would be out next June. Simply to place some rumors to relaxation David said that he is not a bed wetter and he by no means did porno movies although he used to be in some film the place there was some nudity. David's movie opens this Friday. He said he'd come back when he's doing publicity for the X-records movie next spring. More Breast melanoma assessments. 10/15/ninety seven. 9:40am Howard did a couple extra breast cancer tests earlier than doing the information in these days. The primary woman was once a 20 yr old with braces. She used to be excellent watching but she looked so young that they had to verify her identification to make certain. According to Howard this woman Jen had the finest C-cup breasts. He was once particularly impressed with them. She regarded anything like Drew Barrymore consistent with Robin however Howard mentioned she regarded better than that. Howard did the exam on her and mentioned it wasn't erotic.. Sure Howard. Stuttering John got here in and advised Howard that there used to be one other lady ready to have her exam performed. Jen left and 23 yr ancient April came in. She had enormous breasts consistent with Howard. She wasn't even sure what size they were. She stated that they have been both a C or a D cup. Howard seemed to have even more enjoyable doing this exam than he did with the opposite two. Really a day for Howard! How many guys can say they felt up three ladies in less than 2 Â˝ hours? -- Tuesday October 14, 1997 -strange sex Story Tuesday. 10/14/ninety seven. 7:15am there were a bunch of exceptional intercourse experiences being instructed by means of callers this morning. One 24 year historic guy informed a narrative about napping along with his 47 12 months ancient Aunt. He stated she used to be particularly excellent looking but still, that's pretty messed up. One more guy advised a narrative about his sister's friend giving him oral intercourse while his sister was once standing there telling her to do it. Then the pal and the sister got into a lesbian factor even as the brother watched. Later within the show a further guy referred to as in along with his story a couple of dominatrix who crapped on him. He said it used to be anything he desired to do. I'm getting nauseous just writing about it. Howard Jams With Scott The Engineer. 10/14/97. 7:40am before green Day got here in to play a few songs Howard desired to play with their instruments. He wanted to participate in ''Gloria'' along with Scott The Engineer on drums. Howard sang lead and Robin, Jackie and Fred had been backup singers. Of direction it didn't sound that exceptional and right after they had been accomplished taking part in the members of green Day popped their heads in to see if their devices have been okay. Howard didn't know that inexperienced Day had been there in any other case he do not need messed with their stuff. Howard talked to them for approximately 10 seconds then took some mobile calls. Green Day wasn't scheduled to perform except 8:30. Howard settled on naming the group ''The Losers'' after throwing out a few names. Intellectual health dialogue. 10/14/ninety seven. 8:10am Howard stated that he's thinking of going to peer a psychiatrist. This ended in a discussion about how tousled every body on the exhibit is. Fred admitted to going to a psychiatrist for a whilst. Robin also went to 1 for roughly 2 and a half of years. Howard requested Fred if he advised the psychiatrist that he wasn't coming back or did he simply discontinue going. Fred said that he instructed him but Howard did not believe the story. This all led to Fred getting all wound up and freaking out. Howard stated whatever else to Fred to get him fairly wound up however the extend was once hit for some reason. Fred did go nuts though. It was once very enjoyable

to listen to him go off like that. Green Day Performs Two Songs. 10/14/ninety seven. 8:40am Punk rock band inexperienced Day got here in to participate in a few songs for Howard. Howard interviewed them for just a little at the same time before they played. They talked about the lead singer's tattoo's and the way they were just plastered far and wide his hands for no motive. Howard additionally acknowledged seeing the fellows again stage one time. He saw one in every of them spinning round on his back along with his penis striking out while the others had been going for walks around like nuts. Then they ran on stage to begin the show. They failed to seem to grasp what Howard was speaking about nevertheless it was once a heck of a story. The band carried out their hit track ''Basket Case'' first even though they deliberate on playing their new track first. For some purpose Howard wanted them to play the old song first.. Whatever. They performed ''Hitchin' A ride'' subsequent. That one is off of their new album ''Nimrod'' which was simply launched. Girl Who Will Do some thing to satisfy David Duchovny. 10/14/ninety seven. 10:35am Actor David Duchovny from ''The X files'' is scheduled to come back in someday this week. This brought about a mobilephone name from a lady listener who said she'd do whatever to meet David. Howard got here up with some suggestions for her like pouring honey in all places her and letting a canine lick it off. She would comply with some of the less complicated matters like letting them call her ''poop head'' or giving Crackhead Bob a massage but when she said that she would not be inclined to crap in a diaper in front of Howard he stated that was the article she had to do. Howard gave her a few chances to alter her intellect however she refused so tough success for joy. Site Of The Day. 10/13/ninety seven. 7:05am Howard used to be talking about a web page that he recently saw which has females who do not shave and who're quite hairy. He could not bear in mind the address at first so he was attempting a couple of different ones. Good he mentioned the correct one and it was overwhelmed through listeners so Howard couldn't get into it to show Robin one of the crucial graphics. The handle used to be something like www.Hairtostay.Com. Excellent success getting into the web page. Girl To devour Chocolate Cake Out Of Fred's Ass. 10/thirteen/ninety seven. 7:30am a lady known as in and volunteered to devour chocolate cake out of Jackie's ass. I assume she was once inspired via last week's consuming of Hershey Kisses out of the JokeMan's ass. Jackie said that he does not need to do it this time.. It's anyone else's turn. Subsequent in line for the job used to be Fred. He said he'd do it but the woman on the mobile didn't sound too overjoyed with it. The girl stated she'd be equipped to come back in next week someday. She described herself to Howard as 5'9'' tall, one hundred thirty-135 pounds with a 36 C chest. She said she looks form of like a young Kathleen Turner. Update: Kim The Nude rub down woman. 10/thirteen/97. 7:35am Kim was once the fortunate girl who bought the nude rubdown from Jenna Jameson final week. She referred to as on this morning to tell Howard how extremely joyful she was once after having that massage. Howard additionally printed that Kim's bra had come off during that massage. I wasn't conscious of that last week when I heard the exhibit. Kim additionally stated that Jenna was once ''..Rubbing the whole lot..'' in the course of the rubdown. Kim mentioned that she hasn't been changed to lesbianism but she definite enjoyed the rub down. Writer Jean Robinson On The phone. 10/thirteen/97. 7:45am This lady wrote a booklet known as ''How to outlive in spite of Your loved ones''. It's about racism inside black families and the right way to deal with it. Howard interviewed the girl for a even as in regards to the publication and took some cellphone calls from black individuals who've had this difficulty. Jean, who's seventy one, instructed Howard that her mother dealt with her poorly simply considering she had darker dermis than the relaxation of her household. Her mom once said to any one, ''..Isn't it unpleasant..'' like she was once a bit of crap or anything. At one factor in the interview Jean was rambling on about the man who wrote ''potent Grace''. I don't know what her factor used to be however she started singing the track. Let's simply say that she must stick with writing. In order for you to order the guide just name: 1-888-231-2509. Jenna Jameson is available in to present Nude Rubdown. 10/10/ninety seven. 7:35am All week long Howard had been opting for contestants for the Jenna Jameson nude rubdown contest. The day gone by they chose a winner by way of the name of Dee(Darius). He has testicular and penile melanoma and he mostly will not are living more than a yr. Jenna got here in this morning to present the fortunate winner his rub down. Howard talked with Jenna for a couple of minutes about her four month long marriage and about what she was carrying. Jenna plugged some appearances that she'll be making in the close future additionally. Then they moved on to the massage. Dee got here in and Gary described him as being a skinny heavy metal fan style. Or skinny with lengthy hair. Howard stated that he wasn't too bad watching. He got here in with a towel round his waist for the rubdown. He was getting equipped for the rub down when he informed Howard that he had one other notion. Instead of him getting the rub down he wanted Jenna to give his lady friend Kim the rub down. He'd alternatively see that then have the massage himself. Howard didn't intellect on account that he'd rather see that anyway. Dee's lady friend used to be out in the green room so Gary obtained her all mounted with a towel and brought her in. I suppose Kim wasn't too unhealthy looking from what I could inform. Jenna got bare and started giving Kim the rub down. First she was on her back and she or he was loving it. Dee was loving it additionally. Kim wasn't naked however Jenna definite used to be. She used to be utilizing some style of oil for the rubdown. Jenna gave the massage for a excellent quarter-hour strong and Kim used to be moaning and respiration heavy the whole time. At one point Kim rolled over on to her back so Jenna might rub down the entrance. Howard was once loving every second of this. He was trying to interview her even as she was once having the rub down but she might barely pay awareness or reply the questions. As soon as Jenna was once achieved with the rub down Kim used to be dizzy. Gary stated that she stood up and he or she would barely walk straight. I suppose every person appreciated this contest. One woman caller mentioned that she was loving it also. Bloated attorney Dominic Barbara known as in and provided to present the fellow and his female friend 2 airplane tickets to Puerto Rico so that they would stay at his condominium down there. And all Dee had to do was get melanoma in his penis.. The Mike Walker sport With Insane Clown Posse. 10/10/97. 8:45am Insane Clown Posse is a few white guys who rap. They have been on a couple of months ago after they were dropped from a Disney document corporation. They had been simply as irritated as the last time they have been on. They have been dangerous mouthing Jenna Jameson for the reason that she mentioned that she did not recall them after putting out with them not too long ago.

Howard talked with them for a couple of minutes and moved on to the Mike Walker sport. Here are this week's reports, try to choose the false one: Dennis Rodman was going to be an announcer on the nation tune Awards show however during rehearsal he was discovered to be too wild and used to be dropped from the show. Quentin Tarantino asked John Travolta to do a cameo in a small film. John stated he'd do it if Tarantino would pay for the jet gasoline for his confidential aircraft. Tarantino in the end agreed to pay. Donna D'Erico and Gena Lee Nolan refused to come out of their trailer for fear that cosuperstar Carmen Electra would steal their thunder along with her knockout physique. 5 hours later they came out. Even as filming a scene for his television series ''Dellaventura'' Danny Aiello's hair piece fell off so he had to re-shoot the scene. Insane Clown Posse member Violent Jay picked the primary story because the fake, Shaggy 2 Dope picked 4, Robin picked quantity 1, Howard picked three, Jackie picked 4 and Fred wasn't taking part in this week. The genuine fake story was quantity 2. After the game the Clowns hung round for a little at the same time. Howard took some telephone calls from pissed off listeners who appeared to hate the Clown Posse. The clowns just threatened the callers and yelled at them. A couple of fun guys. Danny Aiello Calls Gary About mention In Mike Walker recreation. 10/10/97. 10:15am Gary came in to tell Howard that Danny Aiello known as him to claim that the story that Mike Walker told about his hair piece falling off used to be absolutely false. Danny did not wish to come on the air however he advised Gary that he does not put on a hair piece on his ''Dellaventura'' television show but he did wear one in a film one time. Howard received in contact with Mike Walker once more and informed Mike about this. Mike claims that he has a very good supply that he acquired the story from however he'd check into it. -- Thursday October 9, 1997 -- one other Jenna Jameson Contest Entry. 10/9/ninety seven. 6:30am Howard took extra cellphone calls from listeners with rough good fortune reports today. The grand prize winner gets a nude rub down from Jenna Jameson the next day throughout the exhibit. There have been a bunch of unhappy reviews today however one stood out. Dee, a listener who's had a bunch of dangerous luck following him around, was picked out of the entire other unhappy sacks in the market. Dee stated that his mom and sister each died then one day he ran out of gasoline and as he was once going to get gas he was rear ended via an additional automobile. He aroused from sleep within the sanatorium okay but the doctors discovered that he had testicular melanoma and penile cancer. It can be in an awfully evolved stage in order that they'd have to eliminate his penis and testicles. Even with that he'd nonetheless best have a 15% chance of dwelling. Dee chose to keep his penis. He is ordinarily going to die within 6 to one year or so. Dee won out of his group of reports so now there were 3 finalists. The grand prize winner was once announced later within the morning. Site consult with Of The Day. 10/9/97. 7:15am one of the vital contestants in the Jenna Jameson game is a guy who invented a self lights pipe. He has a web site of his own where you will see that the pipe so Howard checked it out. The web page used to be at www.Thepipe.Com. Dallas Station Being offered by way of Nationwide coverage! 10/9/97. 7:20am Dallas fanatics should be fairly pissed off now. Nationwide coverage has put KEGL up for sale after dropping Howard from the station. Howard mentioned this for approximately 2 minutes this morning. He examine it in some enterprise e-newsletter. I do not know what that means for Stern fans down there but when an extra corporation buys the station perhaps they are going to put Howard again on. Don't depend on it though. Kiki The Drag Queen. 10/9/97. 7:25am This drag queen got here in to tell his/her/it can be story about getting beat up whilst acting at Madonna's birthday occasion not too long ago. Kiki had an extraordinarily masculine voice but he kept denying that he was once a drag queen. He stated that he is had three youngsters and that he misplaced his breasts to breast cancer or something like that. Alas I neglected a few of his story however from what I could hear, he obtained kicked with the aid of someone at Madonna's birthday celebration. He was once performing some songs and any person attacked him for no good reason. As opposed to that there wasn't so much of a narrative. Kiki wasn't that fine as a visitor. Howard Talks To Michelle The Tree house mom. 10/9/97. 7:35am there's a girl in Illinois who moved out of her condo into a tree condominium since she felt that he kids weren't appreciating all of the matters she was doing for them. Good one among Howard's listeners went down to the lady's residence with a mobile phone to peer if she'd let Howard interview her. There were a bunch of television cameras ther masking the story. The guy with the mobilephone just walked proper up to the woman and requested her if she'd wish to talk to Howard. She authorised so Howard spoke to her for a minute. Then a television crew interrupted the dialog and Michelle said that she had to speak to them. Howard had her maintain the cellphone neighborhood so he might continue after the tv interview. A few minutes later he used to be interviewing her once more. He asked her why she was doing this and crap like that. Jim Belushi comes in. 10/9/ninety seven. 8:20am Actor Jim Belushi got here in to plug his new movie ''Gang related''. He stars in it with the late Tupac Shakur. Howard spent many of the interview playing tape of a phony cell call that Gary made to Jim. It used to be like the call to Tom Arnold from a couple of weeks ago where Gary would ask the guy if he might provide you with some outrageous story to inform on the air. He'd ask them to assert ridiculous matters and they'd refuse. Gary requested Jim to assert things about humans like Dan Aykroyd and Princess Diana. Of course Jim didn't agree to assert some thing in view that he failed to need to burn any bridges. Jim had to be rushed out of the studio due to the fact that he had different shows to do. Howard Talks To Fran Drescher On The mobilephone. 10/9/ninety seven. 9:45am When Fran Drescher used to be on just lately she asked Howard if he'd do her exhibit. He said he would however later had 2nd thoughts about it. He could not tell her no without Robin's aid so he did it on the telephone this morning. It wasn't an handy venture though. Fran was once 1/2 asleep once they got her on the telephone. Howard advised her that her exhibit ''The Nanny'' just wasn't the right thing for him to do. Fran advised him that they'd make it effortless on him and are available to New York city to shoot the scene proper within the studio. It could simplest take an hour and it will be easy. Howard informed her no about 10 occasions but she just would not hear of it. She would not quit. She simply kept going and going trying to get him to do it however Howard already made up his intellect. At one factor Howard's mom known as in and told Howard that he will have to simply do the show and let Fran stop begging. Howard stood his ground and failed to supply in. He failed to want to harm Fran's emotions however she did look somewhat upset concerning the whole factor. Howard instructed her that he'd talk to his agent concerning the situation to look if he will have to do it. Do

not count on him showing up on the exhibit. The Jenna Jameson Nude Rubdown Contest Winner Is. 10/9/97. 10:30am good it was late in the show once they sooner or later got round to deciding upon the winner for this nude rubdown. There were three finalists for the competition: Kevin - The 30 12 months old virgin Dee - The penis cancer guy who would not have lengthy to are living Kevin - The blind man who was once shot within the face Howard and Robin painstakingly went over each and every of the stories and picked Dee as the grand prize winner. Dee might be down at the studio the next day for his rubdown. Determine again the following day for the full story. -- Wednesday October 8, 1997 -- it is Time to disregard Andrew cube Clay. 10/eight/ninety seven. 6:45am After large Black played the difficult replica piece on cube and Howard's feud which aired the day past Howard made up our minds that it can be time to disregard him. Cube was once interviewed via the tough replica humans and he challenged Howard to a warfare of wits. He wishes to do it in someplace like Madison square backyard. Good Howard's no longer going to have something to do with something like that. On difficult replica cube mentioned that he is unwell of Howard getting publicity off of his identify. Uh, dice, I feel it's the opposite direction around. That's what Howard thinks additionally so he said that he's no longer going to speak about him anymore. Jenna Jameson Nude massage Contest! 10/eight/97. 7:00am This Friday porn famous person Jenna Jameson will likely be coming in. She will likely be giving one fortunate listener a nude rubdown. The listener with the saddest story will win the contest and get the rubdown. This morning Howard began taking businesses of callers with their sad reports. Out of every crew they will pick the one with the saddest story. Out of that workforce they may opt for the final grand prize winner to get the rubdown. Howard took two agencies of calls this morning and picked two finalists. The primary finalist is Kevin, a 30 12 months ancient virgin. As soon as Howard heard that the man was a 30 yr historical virgin he said ''He wins..''. Robin finally agreed with him so he's in. Out of the 2nd workforce of callers yet another man by way of the identify of Kevin won. This Kevin is blind. He was shot within the face by way of anybody and misplaced his sight. So there we've it. Two finalists thus far. We will usually have more day after today. Fred's CD Dedication. 10/eight/97. 7:25am Fred's band King Norris just lately launched a CD. Howard simply learned about it and skim the dedication within. It is dedicated to Fred's wife Alison. Howard learn it on the air and not fantastically it failed to make a lot sense. It said something about his spouse sticking with him by way of all of the crap. Howard cannot suppose what crap he was talking about. Howard also performed a monitor off of the album called ''Tearing Down The walls''. It's about his relationship with his spouse. Robin stated that she needed to hearken to it a bunch of times to try and make feel out of it. She didn't have any success. (the next was once delivered 10/01/09) Howard learn that Steve Grillo acquired a dedication too. Fred stated that is since he used to show up to a bunch of gigs. Howard brought up the incident that Fred and his wife had at the Rainbow Room one night time. Jackie told Howard about that incident once more. He advised Howard that the room was rotating and by the time Fred and his wife's table received back to the place they had been, the desk had been cleared and Fred and his spouse have been long gone. Fred mentioned that he bumped the table along with his hip and he didn't knock the table over or something. Gary stated he remembers listening to from that guy who was there who mentioned he noticed Fred throw a pitcher at the wall. Fred went off on Gary and mentioned that perhaps they will have to talk about his marriage too. He mentioned that Gary likes to interject and he has no trade doing that with that story. Gary stated he was once just telling them what that caller mentioned when he was once on the air. Howard requested Fred some questions on what the combat used to be about on the Rainbow Room. Fred gave one of the small print and said that it happened four years before. Howard advised Fred that he must lay off the ingesting considering that that appears to result in concern. Howard played the monitor ''Tearing Down the walls'' from Fred's album. Howard stated it used to be style of a Latin sound. He and Robin tried to determine what the lyrics had been about. They weren't having any good fortune figuring them out. Howard asked what the hell he was once speaking about. Howard informed Fred that he should hold all of this stuff locked up within him and not let all of it out. He stated that a relationship is making your self appear like a hero rather of breaking all of these terrible important points of his lifestyles to her. Howard stated he appears like a hero to his children for the reason that of that. Howard performed extra of Fred's track and stated he will get it now. He reduce it off and gave Fred some plugs for the CD. Rapper Busta Rhymes is available in. 10/eight/ninety seven. 8:50am Busta Rhymes got here in to plug his album ''When catastrophe Strikes''. Howard interviewed him for a little bit bit and played pre-recorded tapes of folks out on the street asking questions. They're now not traditional persons, they sound like drunks. He says that the questions are for Busta himself however he is used the tapes for different people like Chris Rock. Some of the questions were: used to be Mike Tyson railroaded on rape fees? Is OJ Simpson responsible? Do gentle skinned black individuals get preferential cure over darkish skinned black humans? Did you participate in the L.A. Riots? Would you do a rap music with OJ? Will have to blacks and whites are living separately? Would you experience in a auto with Rodney King? Busta answered many of the questions. He thinks that OJ was installed to a special extent by the L.A. Law enforcement officials and he stated he'd do a rap music with OJ anytime. Howard stored Busta around throughout the next phase.. 2 guys came in to devour Hershey Kisses out of Jackie's ass for exclusive parts Prize applications! Confidential materials Prize package deal Giveaway. Eat Hershey Kiss Out Of Jackie's Ass! 10/eight/ninety seven. 9:10am A listener from New Jersey known as in previous this morning and requested if he might eat a Hershey Kiss out of Jackie's ass for a confidential elements Prize package. Howard advised him to get down there as quick as viable. He was on his approach in when an additional guy referred to as in from New York city and stated that he would be there faster than the other man to do the same thing. Howard informed him to come back in. They both confirmed up so they both obtained to do their thing. Tommy from Secaucus, NJ used to be the first guy to name in. The opposite man who known as himself ''Hoss'' is the guy from town. Howard had Jackie put 2 of those chocolate Hershey Kisses in his butt crack to warm them up. It seemed like Howard anticipated the blokes to take the Kisses out of the crack with toothpicks and eat them but that's not what they ended up doing. Every guy had to bend over and get the Kiss out of Jackie's ass along with his mouth. Tommy did it lovely speedy. Busta Rhymes was amazed and disgusted throughout the whole factor. He stated it have got to be a ''white factor''. ''Hoss'' was up next to dig into Jackie's ass. His job

wasn't going to be handy though. The 2d Hershey Kiss used to be buried in Jackie's ass pretty rattling excellent. Hoss had to dig in there really a long way to get his prize bundle. All people was once calling him a homo since he was once down there so long. Jackie even jumped at one factor given that the guy's nostril was once so cold. Just yet another day on the strict show. Scott The Engineer Loses His wager. 10/7/97. 6:05am As expected, Scott The Engineer lost his wager with Howard on who would win the yankee sport last night. As soon as Howard got on the air he used to be goofing on Scott and how he loses at the whole thing he does. If Scott bets on whatever you can virtually guarantee that he'll lose the guess. Some listeners have been pissed that Scott made the Yankees lose the sport but some definitely guess against the Yanks and won some colossal cash. One man claimed that he won $8000 given that of Scott. Scott's loss is our obtain. For his loss he needed to dress in a bra and panties and stroll around the block out on the streets of New York city. Howard didnt' make it a quickie both. He dragged it out for over an hour. Once Howard picked out the correct outfit for Scott, Amy the intern mentioned she had to see him. She got here in and laughed it up somewhat. He was once wearing thong lingerie so his ugly ass was once showing and he use. Penile Size Chart Queen to be carrying a DD-Cup measurement bra which he crammed in really nicely in keeping with Robin. Scott eventually made it out onto the streets and there were plenty of individuals waiting to look him. He mentioned that a lot of persons were throwing cash at him. One woman even desired him to bop for her. Cannot wait to peer this one on E! Author Barbara Berg On The cellphone. 10/7/ninety seven. 7:50am This lady wrote a ebook called ''What To Do When lifestyles Is driving You loopy''. It is clearly a book to inform you what to do when your spouse is nagging you. Howard took a bunch of calls from listeners with marriage issues and Barbara would try to supply them some advice. Her voice was quite traumatic so I fairly wasn't listening too carefully to her. Possibly the booklet is healthier than her radio look.. I don't know. If you would like to get the publication here is the quantity: 1-800-669-0773 or go to your nearby publication store and determine it out. Cellphone sex With Howard. 10/7/ninety seven. 8:40am I don't know what it was once with stressful voices in these days however Howard had a legit telephone intercourse woman on the mobile at present and her voice was once pretty dangerous. Some lady called in and stated that she might placed on this so known as reputable mobile sex woman so Howard took her up on the present. A bit at the same time later this woman Holly was once trying phone sex with Howard. Howard obtained sidetracked for a few minutes but then went back to it. When she started saying that she'd lick his inside thighs he had to hold up. I believe he used to be afraid that he'd get too soiled for the radio. Dice On tough reproduction Tonight. 10/7/ninety seven. 9:00am a few people advised Howard that Andrew dice Clay is meant to be on difficult copy at present talking about their feud. I guess cube is going to make a profession out of his combat with Howard now. Assess it out when you get a hazard. Alice, The Black girl Who Dislikes Black folks. 10/7/97. 9:20am This lady known as in a couple of months in the past. She mentioned that although she's black herself she does not like black folks. She got here into the studio at present to tell her story. Certainly it was once YELL her story. Howard saved placing men and women on the cell with Alice and they'd say something to her and she'd go nuts yelling at them. It was lovely funny. Sincerely Alice would not like black individuals when you consider that she's been ripped off with the aid of black people throughout her existence. There was an attractive funny story that Scott Einziger had to tell. Scott was within the mens toilet when he heard a sound next to him. It turned out to be Alice! She was once within the mens room. She said whatever like ''..Damn it, that is the mens room. I've carried out this earlier than. ''. She said that she was sleepy and that she did not recognize which lavatory she was once in. She had carried out it once earlier than when she was once younger additionally. Scott additionally stated that she was once on her interval so he noticed matters that he do not have. One caller was chanting voo doo stuff to Alice but she just yelled on the guy so that you might barely hear it. Earlier than she left she cried about losing her mothers and fathers and sister. She failed to say how she misplaced them but she wept for a couple of minutes. Howard simply laughed. Simply How fat Is Scott The Engineer? 10/6/ninety seven. 7:35am Scott the engineer got here into the studio for some cause this morning and the field of his weight got here up. He's received fairly just a few kilos considering quitting smoking just a few months in the past. All people decided to bet on what he weighs. It was once a small bet put they pooled the money collectively for whoever could get closest to his weight with out going over. Stuttering John guessed 265 kilos, Gary said 258, Robin mentioned 250, Jackie stated 270, Fred stated 220 and Howard said 235. His precise weight used to be 265 pounds! He is 6'1'' tall incidentally. Stuttering John gained the bet. After that wager Howard desired to wager Scott on the yankee baseball sport. Howard mentioned that he'd put up $500. If Scott wins he will get the $500. If he loses he has to decorate in bra and panties and walk around the block. Scott never wins when he bets so Yankee fanatics pay attention. Scott chose the american's to win tonight. Scott may be going for walks the streets the following day morning. Female Farting Contest. 10/6/97. 7:55am only three females showed up for this new contest this morning. Gary said that he had 7 females scheduled to do it. The goal is to peer who can blow a fart the quickest. Gary had a discontinue watch to time the fart. He proven it out on Howard first. Howard blew a couple, one in 2.Four seconds then one in 1.14 seconds and eventually one in .74 seconds. The primary girl up was once Claudia. She could not pull it off despite the fact that she claimed last week that she could be ready to do it after ingesting some milk. The 2nd contestant used to be Mary. Mary let loose a barely audible fart in 22.62 seconds. The last contestant, Veronica, came up and let one rip in 2.21 seconds! And this was once no dainty fart. It used to be an awful sounding nasty blast of a cabbage fart. Inside just a few seconds Howard caught a whiff and almost puked. Veronica mentioned that she ate a 1/four head of cabbage to give you the contest profitable entry or exit because the case may be. She received a circular trip ticket to Las Vegas. Appear out Las Vegas! Comic Chris Rock is available in. 10/6/97. 8:35am Chris Rock got here in to plug his book ''Rock This'' and his comedy CD ''Roll With the new''. Howard introduced Chris to that white comic Colt forty-Feinberg who used to be on the show final week. Colt sounds quite a bit like Chris Rock. Chris failed to to find Colt too humorous. He stored asking Howard the place he found these folks. Howard also had some tape of men and women who desired to ask Chris questions. It was once presupposed to be people out on the avenue. It turned out to be black persons who could barely speak. Howard would play the tape and Chris would

just preserve asking ''the place do you to find these humans?'' over and over. It was simply lovely humorous. After these questions Howard mentioned that he had a listener who won the correct to come back in and ask Chris a question in person. That listener used to be Crackhead Bob. He mumbled anything and Chris asked ''the place do you in finding these people?'' once once more. There were also a few men and women on the mobile who said that they grew up with Chris. One man mentioned that he used to beat Chris up. The mobilephone calls failed to particularly go wherever though. Eddie Murphy's Uncle Ray Calls In. 10/6/97. 10:00am Eddie Murphy's uncle Ray known as in for some extraordinary cause this morning. He didn't really have some thing fascinating to talk about however I inspiration i'd mention it anyway. Woman From The Cultural atmosphere movement Calls In. 10/6/ninety seven. 10:45am previous in the morning Howard read a fax about this team ''The Cultural environment action'' who is joining men and women in Canada to check out and get Howard thrown off the air up there. Close the top of the show a member of the board of this ridiculous team was once on the mobile. She tried to give an explanation for why they are trying to get Howard off the air however it relatively failed to make an excessive amount of experience. Her staff thinks that Howard will have to be taken off the air for the reason that of his ''hateful'' feedback in regards to the French men and women. It's Howard's opinion so he doesn't understand why persons will have to be so worried about it. He asked her the following question: ''shall we say it is World struggle 2 and that i went on the air and said that I hate the Nazi's. Should I be taken off the air for that?''. The lady couldn't give him an reply. She saved heading off the subject. He requested her again and again however she just would not budge. The 2 of them went at it for roughly 15 minutes. When she sooner or later had to go Howard informed her that she was once very courageous to return on the radio. Update: Jolean The Breast Implant lady. 10/three/97. 6:55am you may recollect this girl from her last appearance in July. She came in and desired to get breast implants for the reason that hers have been rather tiny. She was once shot in the head through her boyfriend however lived and all she desired was significant breasts. Well a medical professional called in an offered to do them without cost. She had them achieved and he or she got here in in these days to exhibit them off. Jolean can barely stroll but she has first-class huge breasts now. Howard mentioned that before she even bought the implants she was once offering oral intercourse to persons she barely knew. She offered Doug from E! Once they had been in a limo with a purpose to the general practitioner's place of business. She also provided it to the limo driver. On account that she had the implants she stated that about five or six guys were able to contact her new breasts. She had some ancient black man along with her on the exhibit at present but he was simply serving to her out. She failed to even want him to look her breasts. She had some unusual story about how them met but it did not make much experience. Daniel Carver Awarded F-Emmy For ''quality Daniel Carver appearance''. 10/three/97. 7:35am a different F-Emmy award in these days. This one used to be for the ''quality Daniel Carver look'' so there was once no manner he'd lose. Right here had been the nominees: Daniel's KKK message about Martin Luther King. Daniel's emotions about Tiger Woods. Daniel's KKK message about persons tampering along with his answering desktop. The winning appearance was once all three i suppose. Daniel used to be on the cellphone to be given. He thanked Howard for the gold tampon. Daniel has obtained F-Emmy's prior to now but he stated that he's under no circumstances physically got the award until now. Daniel used to be his average racist self on the telephone and spewed his dumb assed messages while Howard talked over him. Howard additionally had a black man on the mobilephone to yell at Daniel. Pat Cooper is available in. 10/three/97. Eight:05am comic Pat Cooper got here in for some purpose today. This may be an award successful look too. Howard had tape of Pat unhealthy mouthing him on some television show. Pat stated that he by no means dangerous mouths Howard but Howard had the tape. Pat was once more riled up than normal today. He used to be yelling and screaming about crap that simply didn't make sense as common. He thinks that he would beat Howard in the rankings if he had his own radio exhibit on even as. He desired to try this in Las Vegas but he wanted like $1 Million for it. No radio station would pay him that if he hasn't verified himself yet. As Pat was getting in a position to depart Howard stated anything about doing Pat a desire, letting him on the exhibit. Well Pat lost it. He went nuts and stated that Howard wasn't doing him any favors and he didn't wish any favors from anybody. The guy is nuts. It's tough to tell whether or now not Pat used to be sincerely mad or now not. Gary came back in later in the exhibit and mentioned that Pat had some things to plug but he wouldn't tell Gary what they had been because he didn't want any favors done for him. What a nut! Optimistically this may increasingly exhibit up on E! Within the near future for you to see Pat losing it once again. Flip Wilson Awarded F-Emmy For ''Wackiest celebrity moment''. 10/three/ninety seven. 8:50am The F-Emmy for ''Wackiest celebrity second'' used to be awarded to Flip Wilson for his displaying of the penis episode. Right here have been the nominees: Geraldo Rivera calls the exhibit barely coherent after doing his exhibit for 20 hours straight. Roy Firestone sings a music parody about Kato Kaelin. Flip Wilson indicates his penis and lets Robin Radzinski pump it up. Flip was once on the mobile to be given his award. He stated that he is been getting plenty of calls from historical girlfriends and new ladies. He additionally said that he had quite a flight dwelling after doing the show. The flight attendants kept bringing him caviar and lobster. He ended up asking if that they had heard him on Howard. They had and i assume that's why they had been bringing him all of the luxurious food. The Mike Walker game. 10/three/97. 9:10am For ultra-modern Mike Walker recreation we had Colt 40-Feinberg enjoying alongside on the cellphone. Colt is the comedian who performed the ''Wuz up wit my secret'' sport on Tuesday. His actual title is Neil Feinberg and he did his black comic influence throughout the whole recreation. So listed here are this week's stories: Liz Taylor was once bitten by means of a spider. She had an hypersensitivity and had EMT's standing by using at some function she went to. Sharon Stone is having all of her limo drivers screened for drugs and alcohol use after the girl Diana incident. Yasmine Bleeth was striking out with her associates while bowling. She discovered a unfastened string on her gown, she pulled it and the subsequent time she bowled, she ripped the dress exposing her jazzy purple panties. Jerry Seinfeld has been spending various time with co-star Julia Louis-Dreyfus' new baby nowadays. He said that he'd like to find a girl to calm down with so he could have one. Colt 40-Feinberg selected the first story as the fake, Fred selected number 2, Robin picked 4, Jackie picked 3 and Howard picked four. The specific fake

story for this week was once quantity 3, the Yasmine Bleeth story. Mike mentioned that the story used to be proper but now not for Yasmine. It happened to Christina Applegate years in the past. -- Thursday October 2, 1997 -- nice Of Stern. 10/2/ninety seven. These are the days the place Howard being half of Jewish comes in useful. He will get to take trip in these days for Rosh Hashana. Listed below are brand new featured segments: ''i like Lucy'' bit. Dialogue about one in every of Jackie's lame jokes. Sportscaster Al Michaels is available in. Howard complains about his wife paying attention to the exhibit. Lady who claimed to be Madonna's sister called in. Ian the drunk calls in and rambles on and on. -- Wednesday October 1, 1997 -- Paul Rodriguez experiences On His Conan O'Brien look. 10/1/97. 6:15am the day prior to this for the period of Paul Rodriguez's look on the show he said that he was going to be showing on the Late night time with Conan O'Brien exhibit. They asked him to do a stand-up pursuits but he failed to wish to. So he told Howard that he would simply repeat Conan's monolog but do it funnier. He referred to as on this morning to tell Howard what without a doubt happened. He went on and did what he stated however when he watched the exhibit later that night time he noticed that they cut most of his stuff out. He simply wanted Howard to know that he failed to wimp out. He did what he mentioned that the individuals at Late night cut it up. Site Of The Day. 10/1/ninety seven. 7:10am Howard had another cool website to talk over with in these days. It's www.Thatguy.Com/splash/. It is called ''Flash Mountain'' and it has portraits which might be taken close the tip of the ''Splash Mountain'' ride at Disneyland out in California. That's not the cool part although. These are a decide on few the place females have lifted their shirts up simply because the snapshot was once taken. You have to see it. Be warned though, one of the vital ladies aren't exactly attractive. Sy Sperling, Hair club For men President, Calls In. 10/1/ninety seven. 7:20am he's no longer best the President, he's a member too.. Sy Sperling came on the exhibit to ''out'' celebrities who have hair pieces. It didn't really grow to be that big of a deal although. Sy mentioned some celebrities who most persons already comprehend have unhealthy wigs like: Ted Danson Elton John Tony Bennett Howard also read a list of celebs who Sy thinks may have had whatever achieved to their hair like: Paul Reiser Al Pachino Whitney Houston Charles Bronson Nicolas Cage Nothing too interesting there. Sy plugged his ''Hair club For men'' organization and stated that they're offering free hair for children who've cancer and have lost their hair due to the fact of the chemotherapy. If you need to get in touch with them their number is 1-800-HAIRCLUB. John Popper On The phone. 10/1/ninety seven. 7:40am Robin learn a story within the news the day past about one of the contributors of Blues visitor getting arrested for cocaine possession up in Canada. The article failed to mention which member it was once so Howard tracked down lead singer John Popper to find out who it was. Well, it wasn't John. Howard was relieved to listen to that. John mentioned that it was the bass player Bob Sheehan. John did not provide too much knowledge about it considering it simply happened but the authorities up there were very cooperative. He's been released and so they opened for The Rolling Stones final night time. Robin's Masturbation Revelation. 10/1/ninety seven. 7:55am After Howard stated something about now not pleasuring himself for 3 days in a row Robin stated that she did herself last night. Howard asked her who she though about even as she was once doing it. She would not precisely admit to it however Howard figured it used to be her ex-boyfriend Tony. Oops. Mr. X. Robin simply giggled when Howard introduced him up so i'm assuming that he was the person she was enthusiastic about. She also mentioned that she thinks about Richard Gere and some newscaster from big apple when she pleasures herself. Corey Feldman Wins F-Emmy For ''satisfactory celebrity battle''. 10/1/ninety seven. 8:10am This 12 months's F-Emmy awards goes to last without end I feel.. Right here were the nominees for ''high-quality famous person combat'': Corey Feldman fights together with his father concerning the cash his father stole from him. Carol Shaya fights with Gary about doing a Lesbian kiss on the air. Jackie fights with Rodney Dangerfield about money that he borrowed from him. Corey Feldman was once the winner so he was on the phone to take delivery of. He gave his acceptance speech however rambled on a little bit too lengthy so Howard had to reduce him off. Howard used to be in a rush so he didn't spend an excessive amount of time speaking to him. Fran Drescher comes in. 10/1/97. Eight:35am Fran Drescher used to be in to plug the season premiere of her CBS exhibit ''The Nanny'' which airs tonight. Howard mentioned that she's watching nice and she or he was once dressed pretty sexy. Howard needed to find out extra about her marriage breakup. She and her husband lately broke up but obtained again together as buddies given that they are trade companions. She said today that she's nonetheless good buddies with him however she has slept with a few other guys seeing that their breakup. One guy she had intercourse with in the back of a limo! She failed to get into an excessive amount of detail about that though. She and Howard also spent a short time speaking in regards to the tabloid magazines and the best way photographers chase celebrities.