December 3, 2012
Downtown News 7
DowntownNews.com
Then he showed even more adaptability, positioning himself for a run for governor, even though he hadn’t really accomplished much in Los Angeles. Did he run and win? No! When it became clear that Jerry Brown was unbeatable, Villaraigosa adapted and went on Wolf Blitzer’s CNN show to announce he would linger in City Hall. While some might have thought his announcement should have been made to the local media, they were not as adaptable as our mayor. I also think you can get mileage out of Villaraigosa’s ability to almost win some important elections. On Nov. 6 you and Joe Biden boomshakalaka’ed Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan. During that same election, L.A. County voters were deciding the fate of Measure J; a two-thirds approval would have allowed local leaders to seriously speed up — key word coming — transportation projects. Then, fudge, only about 65% of the electorate said yes. While that’s a loss, if you choose not to think about it in pure win-lose terms, and instead ponder how close he got, then Villaraigosa deserves a hearty “Atta Boy!” Measure J might have squeaked by if Villaraigosa had been stumping locally instead of barnstorming across the nation on your behalf, but it’s not like he was gonna be mayor much longer anyway, right? And what kind of go-getter doesn’t want to nail down his next job?
A side benefit of hiring him: Villaraigosa will always have an extra Listerine Breath Strip, should you ever need one. I know you like basketball, and while I’m not certain that our mayor can hit a 16-foot jumper, I do know that he can regale you with stories from the times he was given free tickets to Lakers and Clippers games. Although a minor scandal erupted, and it was suggested that Villaraigosa didn’t do actual city business at these games and at a few dozen concerts he also attended for free, and thus should have paid for his tickets, so what? Those are just rules, and rules are for little people, not for secretaries of Commerce or Transportation. I’m sure Villaraigosa would never do anything similar to embarrass the President of the United States of America. I think as well that you will be impressed by our mayor’s ability to delegate. After a first four years that might charitably have been called a disaster of epic proportions, Villaraigosa — how shall I put this? — took the strong, arm-twisting advice of some local business leaders and hired Austin Beutner, and then delegated overseeing 12 city departments to the former investment banker. Soon after, Villaraigosa also delegated overseeing the DWP to Beutner. Is being the top dog over 13 departments something the mayor himself should have done? Was the 14 months
that Beutner served generally seen as the high point of Villaraigosa’s time in office? Yes and double yes. Hooray for Beut — I mean Villaraigosa. Villaraigosa also has the ability to follow through on key issues. For example, L.A. is now snarled in something like its seventh year of a budget crisis. Other mayors in other cities might have resolved the situation with a major structural change by now, but L.A.’s problems persist and Villaraigosa never seems to — uh, I’m not sure what I’m saying. Atta Boy! If you hire AnVil — and I can’t see any reason why doing so would embarrass the President of the United States of America — then I have one suggestion: Have his hearing checked. During the Democratic National Convention in Charlotte, NC, in September, Villaraigosa made a mistake with a crowd that was overwhelmingly booing and protesting a proposed platform change. In fact, three times he misheard the very clear voice vote, and ultimately ruled that the roaring “NOOOOOOOOO” was a “Heck yeah!” I’d hate to think he mishears one of your directives. If I can answer any questions, don’t hesitate to ask. And if there’s any waffling on AnVil, just think, Atta Boy! Your pal, Jon Regardie Contact Jon Regardie at regardie@downtownnews.com.
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