Kuta Weekly-Edition 396 "Bali"s Premier Weekly Newspaper"

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KUTA WEEKLY Volume 7, Issue 396

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10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

Crusoe’s

BALI V-TWIN DOCTOR Kuta Townhouses

Arriving in Style Blue Bird Taxi Open Golden Bird Lounge at International Arrival Terminal at Bali's Airport

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The Blue Bird Group have created a special lounge for their customers arriving at the International Terminal of Bali's Ngurah Rai International Airport. The new lounge opened on May 5, 2014 when it was inaugurated the CEO of the Blue Bird Group, Noni Purnomo. The lounge measures 68 square meters and offers light refreshment to Blue Bird customers arriving on flights and waiting for their transfer to a local address with a Blue Bird vehicle. www.balidiscovery.com

If you have any interesting articles or would like to advertise please send to info@kutaweekly.com - Ph. 087 860 904 078

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Kuta Weekly

News Corner

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

Kuta Weekly

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

News Corner

Peak Holiday Period Ahead Bali Prepares for Record Lebaran Holiday Travel Period with 242 Additional Flights Bali is preparing for one of the busiest travel period of the year over the Moslem New Year and the end of the fasting month as six airlines are preparing to add flight frequencies to meet the sudden urge in demand expected over the holiday period. The “official” holiday period in terms of peak airline demand runs from July 12 – August 5, 2014. According to Bisnis Bali, six airlines have asked permission from the Bali airport authority to be allowed to operate additional flights over the holiday period.

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Cathay Pacific has asked to add eight flights with a total of 2,488 seats on flights between Hong Kong and Bali. Lion Air is seeking to add 68 flights with a total of 14,629 seats on its Jakarta-Bali sector. The Garuda subsidiary Citilink wants to add 10 flights between Jakarta and Bali with a total of 1,800 seats.

Nam Air and Sriwijaya Air want to a total 34 flights between Surabaya-Bali and Jakarta-Bali with a combined total of 8,488 seats. Indonesia Air Asia is seeking to add 108 flights from various destinations to Bali with a total of 19,440 seats. On an aggregate basis, the six airlines are seeking to add 242 flights with a total of 46.796 seats to meet peak demand during the July-August peak travel period. This is a dramatic 178% increase in the number of flights and a 295% increase in the number of seats from the additional capacity added for the 2013 Lebaran holiday period. www.balidiscovery.com

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Kuta Weekly

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

News Corner

Kuta Weekly

BALI THE RIGHT WAY Gday again folks and welcome to the weekly for the latest in and around Bali. What a week we've had with visa on arrivals going up to $35 dollars for entry into Indonesia. We did get a few emails and messages about how terrible this was, with one lady saying that as a fly in, fly out person, who does the off shift in Bali suggesting that it would be the difference to her choosing to come here or not?? I can't believe that fifteen bucks would make any difference and in actual fact think as per the story on page 33, agree that the tourist numbers will continue to increase at a rate we haven't seen in aliasj@kutaweekly.com many years. There is a reason that the big hotel chains are putting up hotels on the island as quickly as possible and that isn't for tax deduction reasons. It's because people like to come to Bali and holiday, and if you do Bali the right way, it is probably the best place to relax in the world. As far as this writer is concerned you could take the VOA to $100 and it wouldn't stop me from coming. Rock on Bali…. The fact that the Balinese people make Bali such an attractive destination is a credit to the forward thinking powers that be. Some decisions make people happy and others make people question things. One problem in particular is the issue on the island of stray dogs. The advent of the rabies epidemic caused all manner of problems for the islands good name and many knee jerk reactions happened as a consequence of this. At the end of the day there really is no other way than to get rid of them, that's that. (Oh, I can't wait to see the hate emails next week) With regards to the subject we did get an email that I thought I would share with you all. The email is as follows: Dear Editor: Governor Made Mangku Pastika's knee-jerk order to kill stray dogs on sight in a misguided attempt to prevent rabies is not only extremely cruel, it is also ineffective. Many of the animals who face extermination are friendly neighborhood dogs who have already been vaccinated against rabies and pose no threat to residents. Killing off these dogs will only create a vacant niche and a spike in the food supply which will allow surviving—and unvaccinated—feral dogs to reproduce at a faster rate. This results in an endless cycle of killing. The only humane and effective way to control rabies is by implementing a comprehensive rabies vaccination and spay/neuter program. Vaccinating dogs against rabies ensures that strays will not spread this disease to humans, and spaying and neutering will stop the problem at its source, by preventing more dogs from being born only to end up on the streets. Dogs who have not been sterilized are also three times more likely to bite. Humane education in schools is also needed to teach children how to avoid bites and what to do if they are bitten.

News Corner

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

Indonesia Votes! Wednesday, July 9, 2014 Declared a Holiday as Indonesians Vote to Elect i t s 7 t h President Indonesian s across the archipelago will go to the polls on Wednesday, July 9, 2014, to directly elect the Nation's next president and vice-president The race is between the former general Prabowo Subianto and his running mate

former cabinet minister Hatta Rajasa running against Jakarta governor Joko Widodo and former vice-president Jusuf Kalla.

Although the man who e m e r g e s victorious will be the 7th person to h e a d t h e Republic since nationhood was declared in 1945, it will only be the third time that Indonesians have gone to the polls to directly e l e c t t h e Indonesia's next chief executive. To facilitate the election process, Wednesday will be a national holiday across Indonesia. www.balidiscovery.com

Get Inked @ Bali Ink

Each of us can do our part to prevent rabies and keep dogs off the streets by having our canine companions vaccinated and sterilized. Sincerely, Jason Baker Vice-President of International Operations

GPO Box 1700 Central, Hong Kong +852-6200-7588 JasonB@PETAAsiaPacific.com

PETA Asia So there it is folks, another week slipped by without us even knowing it. I hope the Blues take the third game as well as they took the first two games, I hope the Pies actually have a win over a lesser side than them and I hope the elections happen without incident in Indonesia this week and that the people get what they vote for. I sincerely hope that the most of you stay safe, happy, healthy and always remember, people will judge you anyway so don't live your life trying to impress others, live your life impressing yourself. Enjoy Your Week, ALIASJ…

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Kuta Weekly

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10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

Kuta Weekly

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

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WEEKLY SPORTS PROGRAMMES Jl. Poppies I, Pasar Agung, Kuta, Bali Telp: (0361) 761464 website : www.kutatownhouses.com Round 16

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THURSDAY AFL Footy Show @ 8.30pm FRIDAY Adelaide v Hawthorn @ 5.30pm SATURDAY Melbourne v Geelong @ 11.30am North Melb. v St. Kilda @ 12noon W. Bulldogs v Gold Coast @ 2.30pm Brisb. Lions v West Coast @ 5.30pm Syd. Swans v Carlton @ 5.30pm SUNDAY Richmond v Port Adelaide @ 11.00am Essendon v Collingwood @ 1.00pm Fremantle v GWS @ 2.30pm

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- Tropical - Pineapple - Strawberry 7


Kuta Weekly

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10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

Keeping Indonesia's Hotels 'in the Game' Hotel Link Solutions Indonesia Wins Award for Help Local Hotels Get a Larger Share of the OnLine Booking Market Established in mid-2013, the Indonesia Hotel Link Solutions team has been acknowledged as the best international sales force for Q2 2014 and Indonesian team member Joe Yonathan in Bali winning honors as the best s a l e s m a n internationally. Chandra H i m a w a n , Manager of Hotel Link Solutions Indonesia, ascribes the success of his Indonesian team to the fast growing list of Indonesian accommodation p r o v i d e r s experiencing a surge of on-line bookings, both direct and via on-line travel agents (OTAs), after signing on to the Hotel Links Solutions program. "It is emotionally rewarding for myself and the rest of the members of the Hotel Link Solutions-Indonesia team when, in just a matter of weeks, we develop world-class web sites and fully functional booking widgets that create large streams of significant revenue for small and medium-sized hotels," explained Chandra. While almost all hotels and villas have some sort of website, Chandra says many Indonesian hotels and villas have failed to advance with the times,

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displaying sites anchored in the on line practices of 5-10 years ago, using sites and technology that has failed to advance with the rapidly changing profile of on-line customers and on-line purchasing behavior. Careful studies of on-line consumer behavior have removed the guesswork from designing hotel and villa sites and booking engines able to generate significant Internet

sales. According to Chandra, in order to be successful, accommodation websites must, among other things, be: Androgynous - Because of the global shift from traditional desktop computers to mobile devices, accommodation websites must display attractively on both a standard computer and on handheld devices. Fast Loading and Attractive - Websites must load quickly or risk losing visitors before a sales dialogue can even commence. Continuously Reviewed and Evaluated - Websites must undergo regular detailed analysis using a range of analytic

visitors interact with the information presented. Be Equipped with a Sophisticated Booking Engine The standard "contact us" form where customers write and send their requirements that can be responded to later by the hotel are relics of the "old" Internet. To d a y ' s s h o p p e r s w a n t immediate access to a competitive price be able to instantly book, confirm and pay for their accommodation. Today, hotel bookings are often made just minutes after a traveler has booked and paid for their air travel on an airline site. As a result, successful hotel and villa websites must permit immediate on-line booking, automatic payment a n d i n s t a n t confirmation. Hotel Link Solutions Indonesia approach to digital marketing provides all this and more. Their websites and booking engines (widgets) empower small and medium sized hotel operators to compete with the sophisticated on-line presence of large international chain hotels. These websites and booking engines also allow instantaneous rate changes and the launching of special offers to a worldwide network of OTAs. These solutions offered by Hotel Link Solutions Indonesia are affordable, effective and can be put in place producing new sales stream within the space of a few days. Continue to next page

Kuta Weekly

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

News Corner

from page 8...............

Working with OTAs

line bookings. Participants also receive a “Digital Marketing Health Check” – an objective review of a hotel's or villa's online presence that identifies critical steps to improve online sales. Over the coming months Hotel Link Systems Indonesia will be conducting seminars in: BALI – Kuta, Sanur, Ubud, Candidasa, Ahmed, Lovina North Bali and Gili Trawangan.

Working with OTAs is an important part of the digital marketing mix for successful hotel and villa operations. Hotel Link Solutions helps its clients pick “the best match” from among more than 50 leading OTAs and, s o l u t i o n s f o r following the best practice of accommodation providers. major hotel brands, develops Presented by senior strategies to maximize the members of the Hotel Link number of direct bookings Solutions team, these 2-hour flowing through a website. “coffee breaks” are free-ofWant to Learn More? charge and are loaded with JAVA – Surabaya, Yogyakarta, The Hotel Link Solutions i d e a s , p r a c t i c a l t i p s a n d S e m a r a n g , J a k a r t a a n d I n d o n e s i a Te a m c o n d u c t strategies to help small and Bandung informative digital marketing medium-sized hotels and villas www.balidiscovery.com seminars presenting the latest substantially increase their onthinking and digital marketing

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Kuta Weekly

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

News Corner

Kuta Weekly

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

News Corner

Burglar sends ÂŁ100, and 'sorry' note - 22 years later A pub landlady has received a ÂŁ100 cheque, and a note saying "sorry", from a woman involved in a burglary there more than 20 years ago. F r a n c e s Cunningham, landlady of the Swttenham Arms in Congleton, Cheshire, and her husband were sent the payment, complete with a note from a woman apologizing for the "cruel" break-in in 1992. The note, whose author has not been named, said: "To Mr and Mrs Cunningham, I was involved in a burglary at your business in 1992 approximately. "I didn't break in or smash up the cigarette machine, but I was there and I went in. "I'm very, very sorry. I did not realize the seriousness of my actions at the time." The note goes on: "I had been through a lot and had no idea where to get help. I am so ashamed and sad because of the fear it may have induced and the cost and

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time. "I wish I could take it back a lot, I hope that you will never be bothered by such cruelty ever again." The letter, sent by recorded delivery, finished: "P.S. If there are any further costs, let me know". Mrs Cunningham told BBC Radio 5Live that she remembered the break-in, which happened before the couple bought the pub at auction in 1993, "vaguely", but that her son recalled problems with the cigarette machine. She added: "This came as a complete and absolute surprise, to me to open the

envelope and to have a cheque for ÂŁ100. "This lady's been worried about this all this time, and so much so that she has decided now to send me a cheque and hope that she will be forgiven. "And I shall most definitely write back to her and say please don't worry about this anymore because your honesty now makes up for more than that. "The thing is then is what do I do with the cheque because strictly speaking the money in the machine wouldn't have been mine anyway ... because it belongs to the people who put the machine in." She concluded that she would donate the money to the local church, who were always short of money. Mrs Cunningham added: "Would't it be a lovely world if everybody did this now, if we all started sending or returning gifts?"

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Kuta Weekly

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Kuta Weekly

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Kuta Weekly

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

News Corner

Taxing for Training Denpasar, Bali G o v e r n m e n t Coordinating Efforts to Collect US$100 Monthly Tax from Foreign Workers Revenues earned by the Denpasar Metropolitan Government from the US$100 per month training tax (IMTA) charged foreign workers now totals RP. 2.3 billion for the period January – June 2014. Meanwhile, Denpasar has set a target of Rp. 2.5 million in for IMTA for all of 2014. Officials are confident that the target will be easily surpassed by year's end. There are currently around 200 foreigners holding work permits in Denpasar and paying the US$100 per month training tax.

Erwin Suryadarm a, the head o f t h e S o c i a l Service and Manpower ensure all foreigners Department for the City of working in Denpasar have the Denpasar, told Bisnis Bali that necessary working permits coordination is underway to and ARE paying the IMTA. dispatch teams form immigration, police, Satpol PP www.balidiscovery.con and other departments to

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Sports Corner

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

Argentina fans taunt injured Brazil star Neymar by celebrating with plastic spine ARGENTINA fans have taken the fierce rivalry with Brazil to a whole new level, celebrating in the streets with a plastic spine to mock injured superstar Neymar. Neymar was forced out of the remainder of the 2014 World Cup after fracturing his vertebrae in a 2-1 quarter-final victory against Colombia. Now a YouTube clip has emerged of the Argentina fans jumping around and singing while holding a spinal chord. The fierce Argentina-Brazil rivalry, dubbed “The Battle of the South Americans”, is steeped in history — most notably a 1946 clash in which Brazilian Jair Rosa Pinto fractured Argentine captain José Salomón's tibia and fibula, ultimately leading to players fighting on the pitch with the police. During the 1982 World Cup, Argentina legend Diego Maradona kicked Brazilian player João Batista and received a straight red card. The two teams could potentially meet in a dream World Cup final on Monday morning (AEST). Brazil must first get past

Germany in Wednesday morning's (6am AEST) semi-final, while Argentina faces the Netherlands in the other semi-final on Thursday (6am AEST). Neymar and the Brazilian football confederation have denied media reports the striker could undergo special treatment on his fractured vertebrae to try to play in the World Cup final if the tournament hosts make it that far. N e y m a r a n d t h e confederation released statements saying nothing that could risk the player's health or career would be attempted to allow him to try to play if Brazil beats Germany. The statements came after the Brazilian media quoted doctors

from the Brazilian club Santos, Neymar's former team, as saying there was a chance the striker could return for Monday morning's final with alternative treatments and painkiller injections. Brazil captain Thiago Silva has branded Colombia defender Juan Camilo Zuniga a coward for the tackle which put the 22-yearold Neymar out of the World Cup. “It was a cowardly tackle,” Silva said. “I am a defender, I know how to mark a player and there is no way you can get the ball by putting a knee in the back. “It is not something that comes about in a normal match situation.” FIFA turned down a request from the Brazilian Football Confederation (CBF) to ban Zuniga because the incident had been seen by the match officials at the time and no action was taken. Silva will miss the match against the Germans in Belo Horizonte after FIFA also turned down the CBF's appeal against his yellow card in the quarter-final win over Colombia.

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Sports Corner

Germany face hosts Brazil in the opening semi-final of the World Cup in Belo Horizonte Klinnsman has brought on a team praised for As Brazil and Germany prepare to do its attacking play. And his tactics have been hailed by battle, old stereotypes of both countries' World Cup legends Pele and Diego Maradona. football philosophies are being rewritten. Amazingly for two World Cup powerhouses with 24 semi-final appearances, this will be just their second meeting in the competition after the 2002 final. Back then a rugged German side that battled it's way to the final with a series of 1-0 wins on the back of the best goalkeeper in the tournament, Oliver Kahn, faced a Brazil side containing a magical front t h r e e o f Ronaldo, Ronaldinho and Rivaldo. T h a t night an uncharacterist i c K a h n mistake put Luiz Felipe Scolari's Brazil on their way to a fifth title. However , the only constants from 12 years ago may be that Scolari is back as Brazil boss and Germany still have the best goalkeeper in the tournament in Manuel Neuer. Even Neuer represents the German's style shift in the past decade with his sweeper-like ability to flee from his box and become an extra outfield player in building the play from the back. Germany have played 500 more successful passes than anyone else in the competition and more than 1000 more than Brazil, who still lag behind Chile despite having played a game more. Since committing to attack when hosting the tournament in 2006, Germany have scored 40 goals in the last three World Cups helping them a record run of four consecutive semi-finals. The German sides of recent years will be much more fondly remembered by the football world at large, yet that attractive football hasn't got them over the line in the final stages. And that threatens to leave coach Joachim Loew as a nearly man. The 54-year-old former assistant to Jurgen

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The German Football Association (DFB) likes the team boss. It has already told him his job is safe and Loew is expected to see out his contract which expires after Euro 2016. An impressive record of 75 wins in 110 internationals has earned Loew plenty of respect in Germany. And he is not afraid of taking risks. Meanwhile, Brazil's approach to hosting the tournament has been rather different. Winning at their own World Cup is all that counts, no matter what reputations or opposing players take a battering in the process. Scolari's men committed 31 fouls in their h u n t o f Colombia and, in particular, J a m e s Rodriguez in the quarterfinal, the most of any side in a game at this World Cup. “I am all for hard, clean challenges, but there were one or two tackles which were over the limit,” said Germany's Bastian Schweinsteiger. “The Brazilians aren't the magicians here of old, the team has changed and so has their playing style. “Hard challenges definitely belong to that, it's something we have to be careful of and the referee as well.” The strategy was hardly an isolated one, Brazil also committed 28 fouls against Chile in the previous round. Brazil's poster boy Neymar was the one residual element of the famous 'Jogo Bonito' left in this side. As 1970 World Cup winning forward Tostao concluded earlier in the tournament: “Brazil have two strategies: number one, give it to Neymar; number two give it to Neymar.” Without his flair there seems little other option than to fight their way to the final.

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Kuta Weekly

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Kuta Weekly

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Sports Corner

Kuta Weekly

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

News Corner

Debate: Do we need the State of Origin III dead rubber? THE State of Origin dead rubber is on Wednesday night. Why should we care? Do we really need it? News.com.au's C a m e r o n To m a r c h i o a n d Anthony Sharwood argue for and against.

YES, WE NEED IT THERE are no dead rubbers in Origin. Everyone talks about Origin's intensity. The passion. Mate against mate, hate against hate… What it's really about is the history. O v e r 101 matches in 34 years of Origin football, Queensland now – on the back of eight series wins in a row – has opened up a considerable gap in the overall head-tohead stakes. It's Queensland with 53 wins, NSW 46 and two draws. For Blues fans, that's hard to swallow. For years, the overall tally was so close, but that's not the case anymore and it's one of the reasons why next Wednesday's State of Origin III still matters. A lot. The other reason is the glory of the sweep. Only seven times before has a team whitewashed Origin since it became a three-match series in 1982 – and NSW hasn't swept a series since 2000. Try telling the NSW players, who have battled through the indignity of eight straight losses, that hitting back with a 3-0 series win does not matter. Try telling the Queensland players, heading back to Suncorp Stadium after their dynasty came to an end, that winning in front of the passionate home crowd does not matter. As for the disruption to the NRL season, well that's a scheduling issue

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and a far bigger problem than just game three. Why not take a break in the middle of the NRL season and play Origin over three straight weeks? That way teams don't lose their stars for extended periods and the league season does not go through the two-month long lull we have just experienced. Origin is the pinnacle of rugby league, we only get three games of it a year, so why would you want to deny the players and fans of all three? Whether or not the series is on the line doesn't matter.

The players care. The fans care. And history matters.

NO, WE DON'T ORIGIN dead rubbers are like watching a bad comedian come on stage after Seinfeld. What's the point? We've seen the best of the best, now the series is decided. We have a winner. You spend half the match praying your favourite club star won't suffer some horrendous injury, the other half channel-surfing to find a Big Bang Theory episode you haven't seen yet. Usually, your hopes are dashed on both counts. Do tennis players play the final set of a three set match when it's 2-0? Did the NBA finals continue when it was 4-1? Do they take the rest of the penalties in a World Cup shootout when a team has claimed a decisive advantage? Sometimes you just have to draw a line and say, “Right, this thing is

done, let's move on with life.” There is one exception to this argument, and that is Test cricket. This writer would never argue for the abandonment of an Ashes series after three Tests, thus avoiding delicious whitewashes of the type we've seen in two of the last three Ashes series in Australia. The difference is, Ashes cricketers have nowhere else they really need to be once the series is decided. Also, organising/refunding ticketing for a five day event would be a nightmare. So Test cricket is a clear exception to the dead rubber rule. But Origin isn't. Now, I'm well aware that there is still pride to play for, as my colleague C a m To m a r c h i o has argued. A great example of that was 2003. NSW won the first two games in comfortable style, then Queensland flogged them 36-6 in game three, just t o s a y, “ H e y, w e ' r e s t i l l Queenslanders. You don't mess with the Maroons.” You can bet they'd love to send a similar message tomorrow. All the same, a dead Origin rubber has less of a buzz around it. Hardly anybody organises nights out in the pub and the pre-match crossborder banter is virtually inaudible. It'll be a great game, no one doubts that. Well, it couldn't be a worse spectacle than game two. But it won't be an important game, a meaningful game, an era-shaping game. Get the good players back into the NRL where they belong. Origin had its grand final in game two. The best players should now be setting their sights on the NRL grand final rather than a meaningless encounter in Brisbane.

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Kuta Weekly

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

News Corner

Kuta Weekly

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

Sports Corner

THURSDAY Syd. Swans v Geelong @ 5.00pm FRIDAY St. Kilda v Collingwood @ 5.30pm SATURDAY Melbourne v Port Adelaide @ 11.30am B. Lions v Carlton @ 2.30pm Essendon v Richmond @ 5.30pm SUNDAY Adelaide v Gold Coast S. @ 1.00pm W. Bulldogs v Fremantle @ 2.30pm Hawthorn v GWS @ 2.30pm West Coast v North Melb. @ 6.00pm

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Sports Corner

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

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ROUND 15 CLUB 1 Panthers 2 Sea Eagles 3 Bulldogs 4 Rabbitohs 5 Roosters 6 Broncos 7 Warriors 8 Storm 9 Eels 10 Wests Tigers 11 Dragons 12 Titans 13 Cowboys 14 Knights 15 Raiders 16 Sharks

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James Slipper disappointed by comments from QLD greats questioning Reds' character JAMES Slipper has returned fire at the former Queensland greats who have questioned the Reds' courage. Then, just as the red mist was disappearing from his eyes, the Reds prop let fly a pre-emptive shot at the New South Wales Waratahs ahead of Saturday nights inyetstate Super Rugby showdown at Suncorp stadium. “I just don't like NSW winning anything, “ Slipper said. Former Queensland front-rower Stan Pilecki said the Reds failed to have a go at the weekend in their loss to the Western Force.

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Slipper cited halfback Nick Frisby playing with a broken jaw and captain James Horwill bleeding for the cause as evidence to the contrary. “To question our effort, motivation and will to play for the Reds jersey was upsetting,” he said. “Ive heard some of the comments, from people I aspire to be ... its disappointing. “Everyone wants to kick you when you're down.” The Waratahs can lock up top spot with a win against their fierce rival while the Reds will be fighting for credibility after missing the finals.

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10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

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New York Yankees fan caught sleeping suing ESPN for $10 million A FAN who dozed off during a game at Yankee Stadium hopes to score a huge windfall over the merciless ribbing he got f r o m t w o E S P N announcers. Andrew Robert Rector filed a $10.67m defamation suit against Dan Shulman and John Kruk for allegedly unleashing an “avalanche of disparaging words” against him that include “stupor, fatty, unintelligent, stupid”. The Bronx Supreme Court filing also says the play-by-play team made the taunts “knowing and intending the same to be heard and listened to by millions of people all over the world”. Rector admits he “briefly slept” while attending an April 13 match between the Bronx Bombers and their long-time rivals, the Boston Red Sox.

When an ESPN camera caught him napping, Shulman and Kruk allegedly began an “unending verbal crusade” against him, with their “vituperative utterances” repeated the next day on the Major League Baseball website. “These unmitigated verbal onslaughts crossed the line between reporting on sport and abuse against the plaintiff without reasonable cause or restraint,” Rector's suit says. A YouTube video posted by

MLB, titled “Fan sleeps in stands during game vs. Red Sox,” shows a heavy-set young man snoozing in his seat, his head tilted over his right shoulder. Rector's typo-ridden suit claims the “false statements” about him include suggestions that he “is a fatty cow that need two seats at a time” and “is a confused individual that neither understands nor knows anything about history and the meaning of rivalry between Red Sox and New York Yankee”. In addition to defamation, Rector claims to have suffered “intentional infliction of emotional distress”. The suit also names as defendants ESPN, MLB and the Yankees. ESPN declined to discuss the suit. The Yankees and MLB didn't immediately return requests for

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Even though he finished a distant third, three quarters of a minute behind race winner Lewis Hamilton, he had plenty of reason to celebrate. He had just done the impossible. Ricciardo had climbed to the podium from eighth on the grid, nursing a set of Pirelli's medium compound tyres through the final 37 laps of the race, a distance far longer than anyone - even his own team - expected them to last. The worn out tyres faded badly in the closing laps, but offered up just enough grip to allow him to see off a charging Jenson Button for his fourth podium finish of his career. “I'm not normally ecstatic with a third but I really am today,” a jubilant Ricciardo said. “This is the best third place I've ever got.” With the race stopped after Kimi Raikkonen's terrifying opening lap crash, Ricciardo was one of many drivers to change tyres on the grid ahead of the restart. Both Red Bulls opted to get their stint on the hard compound rubber out of the way but Ricciardo struggled in the early laps, falling as low as ninth. He was back up to fifth by the time of his first pit stop for medium Pirellis, but at that stage he and his team were still planning a second stop. “We pitted quite early on the Prime (hard tyres) because we were quite slow and it wasn't working, so we came in for the Option (medium tyres) and, at one point, my engineer pretty much said alright four laps to go on this tyre then let's box. “I said the pace seems okay, the tyres aren't getting any worse and let's try and stay out or at least think about keeping me out there and he said 'okay we'll look at our options.' “Then, a few laps later he said 'do you think you can go to the end, there's 15 or 20 laps to go,' and I said, at the moment I think we can give it a crack.” The gamble - in stark contrast to the qualifying call the previous day - proved a masterstroke. As his rivals pitted for the final time, Ricciardo rose to third place and held his ground. He managed the gap back to Button over the final ten laps, perfectly judging his race to beat the home race hero to the chequered flag by just eight tenths of a second. “He was catching me pretty quickly at the end,” Ricciardo said. “I had sort of stabilised the gap a bit and then with

News Corner

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

EL

DANIEL Ricciardo shook his fist triumphantly as he walked away from his Red Bull, parked under the podium after the British Grand Prix.

Kuta Weekly

M

Daniel Ricciardo 'ecstatic' following a fighting drive into third place at the British Grand Prix

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Sports Corner

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

M AR ER T TA M N AR A KE DI T

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Direct postage to Australia Available four laps to go my Options were really suffering and he was coming. “I was thinking that for once I've got a lot of people booing me and cheering on the local lad!” Ricciardo's podium finish consolidates his third place in the Drivers' World Championship ahead of the German Grand Prix at Hockenheim on July 20.

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Kuta Weekly

News Corner

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

Recycling Revolution hits Bali There's no denying the fact that Bali is a destination that has been hugely impacted by tourism. On the bright side, through education comes power, and more tourists are looking to support environmentally conscious businesses during their travels. It may have taken awhile, but Bali is starting to catch up when it comes to eco-friendly and sustainable options, catering to the new generation of conscious tourists by joining what has widely been known as the Recycle Revolution. There are some inspiring movements going on when it comes to supporting sustainable practices in Indonesia and at the forefront is ecoBali Recycling. Established in 2006 by like-minded professionals, ecoBali works towards the vision of a Zero Waste Policy, implementing such practices as waste separation, recycling and composting; practices that are imperative to a region so heavily burdened by tourism. By providing recycling programs, education and drop-in centres, ecoBali are currently recycling 12-4 tonnes of plastic, metal and glass per month, along with 30 tonnes of beverage cartons. Along with the recycling of these consumable materials, ecoBali are committed to innovative “upcycling” initiatives including turning discarded glass bottles into reusable glassware and using recovered fabric scraps for pillow stuffing. Their drop-in centre also allows local businesses access to recovered materials for further production, and these recycled matters are currently being used for everything from surfboard wax to bags. Initiatives like this are a sign of great things to come for Bali; a region worthy of maintaining its status as paradise on earth. For

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those who want to enjoy their holiday without feeling guilty every time they lie back with a cocktail in hand, do your research and support the admirable businesses that support ecoBali's practices. The following provide a couple of examples of businesses that support recycling programs and mindful business practices. From saying no to plastic bags, to utensils made from upcycled glass, these are places well worth supporting:

Founder of ecoBali Recycling, Bali Budda is more than just another healthy, vegetarian, good vibe café for the Eat Pray Love masses. This entity wasn't created to follow a trend, but to follow a way of life that honors homemade, organic food and a zero-tolerance waste policy while supporting local organisations. The popularity of these little gems speaks for itself and is great testimony to the hard work and dedication of the staff. There really can't be enough good things said about Bali Buda. These guys not only make mouthwatering, healthy food, but they have made sustainable practices part of their standard procedures. Bali Buda source recycled jars from ecoBali to use for their soups, take a w a y, c o c o n u t w a t e r a n d Kombucha, while utilizing the help of the local community to fashion paper bags made from old newspapers in place of harmful plastic. They use banana leaves and recycled paper to wrap their food, while washing their own

laundry using natural soap and air-drying. If there is another establishment as dedicated to sustainability and recycling as Bali Buda, I have yet to hear about it. This is where you want to be if you want to indulge without the guilt. RedDoor provides a contemporary take on luxury island living, containing all the opulence of a five star resort while remaining committed to environmental sustainability. This is eco-friendly chic at its finest, where guests can rest assured that their money goes back into the local community in ways that create positive change. RedDoor villa is certified Carbon Neutral and parts of accommodation profits go to The S a b a h R a i n f o r e s t Rehabilitation.They have a partnership in place with ecoBali which guarantees that the villa remains committed to recycling over 90% of all waste on the premises. Guests also enjoy organic produce grown onsite in the surrounding gardens. Let's just say RedDoor Villa deserves the splurge! The name speaks for itself really, and what an awesome idea this is. These guys source materials from old boats around the Balinese islands and use the timber to create beautiful and unique items of furniture, from closets to coffee tables. They have fair trade agreements in place with local fishermen, buying old fishing trawlers that are too expensive to repair and upcycling them into kick ass furniture. The fishermen receive pay for the old boats, the carpenters receive the money from the furniture sales and the environment is saved from more damage, making it a winwin transaction for all. The workshop is open Monday to Friday from 9AM to 5PM and Saturday from 9AM – 3PM. Well worth a look, with exports easily arranged. Check out their website here.

Kuta Weekly

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

News Corner

Living the Bali Dream I had an interesting conversation over a few quiet beers with two mates from Perth, who now live in Kuta-Bali. Cliffie 75 yrs and Frankie 71 yrs who are sick and tired of listening to the rubbish that is getting airtime on the mainstream news back home about the island, these guys, like so many of us, love so much. It seems the people back home that don't know what actually happens in Bali are believing the weekly television broadcasts, that depict everyone who lives or visits Bali as a person who is drinking themselves to oblivion or acting as a wild animal would. This, as the lads know, is not the case and retiring on the island as a life choice, is what these guys have done. “It's not all about drinking and buying cheap clothes” said Mr. Frank, “I wear clothes that I've had back in Australia for years, and if I need new ones I'll go and buy them” “Life on the island is about as relaxed as I could want” is the view from Mr. Cliff “My quality of life is so much better than stretching my cash back home” We have taken to spending our days at the beach, with our main aim being to stay healthy and enjoying the rest of our days with our family. The guys needed to keep fit so a couple of years ago they purchased push bikes, then started riding everyday for about 10 km at first then 20, then 30 then looking further afield to the attractions that the island has to offer such as Sanur, Nusa Dua, Tanjung Benoa, Balangan Beach/village,… often being seen riding through many small villages where travellers never venture, seeing things that only the most adventurous get to see. The whisper is next week the boys, along with a few friends are riding to Candi Dasa, approximate 65km each way, where a bbq has been arranged for the team when they arrive at the planned stop. They will be spending a couple of days touring in and around Candi Dasa, returning to Kuta on the 3rd day. So as you can see, Bali can be very much enjoyed without tearing around on a motorbike half full of booze. Get out and about as there are many delightful things our boys have found off the beaten track which can be very much enjoyed by all. Anyone who is interested in joining the lads on planning a journey or on a daily ride can contact Mr. Frank on 081 337 812 933. p.s. At the end of each day the “BIKES” can be found at the beach with friends enjoying a few cold green bottles. Now this is what “Really Happens In Bali” Enjoy The Ride. Thanks to all the other Candi Dasa Riders, MARDI, BENOA, COLIN, JOHN

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Kuta Weekly

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

News Corner

Kuta Weekly

Passenger jets in near miss THIS is the heart-stopping moment when two passenger jets came within seconds of disaster at a major international airport. They were just a few hundred yards apart when the Boeing 767, travelling at 150mph, was forced to abort its landing to avoid crashing into an Airbus A340 taxiing on the runway. The near-miss at Barcelona's El Prat Airport is now the subject of an official investigation by Spanish aviation watchdogs. It happened just before 7am on Sunday when the 767 operated by Russian airline UTair was coming in to land, just as a transatlantic Aerolineas Argentinas plane taxied across its path to prepare for takeoff. Between them, the jets are thought to have been carrying hundreds of passengers. Only last-minute action by the UTair crew appeared to prevent what experts said would have been a 'certain major disaster'. Some pilots estimated that the Russian plane was just 100ft above the ground when the pilot pulled away. He then performed a 'go around' pulling up fast and accelerating hard to abort the landing before bringing the aircraft down safely shortly afterwards. The drama was caught on camera by aviation enthusiast Miguel Angel. He then posted the video online, where it has already been viewed more than a million times. Mr Angel, who can be heard whispering 'Oh my God' in Spanish as he shoots the footage, described it as 'one of the worst experiences I have ever had'.

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Witnesses say such near-misses are a regular occurrence at the airport. One told a Spanish newspaper: 'I know the guy who took the video and he's told me it's the fourth time he's seen something like this.' Independent Spanish civil aviation accident investigators announced they would be looking into it. Airport chiefs also promised to take action, despite earlier trying to play down the incident. A spokesman for Spanish Airports and Air Navigation said there was never any danger of a collision as there was enough space between the two planes. He said that the 'go-around' performed by the Russian pilot was standard procedure and neither of the airlines involved had made a formal complaint. The UK's Civil Aviation Authority said that if the incident had happened in Britain, it would have been classified as a 'runway incursion' and looked into by the Air Accidents Investigation Branch. The near-miss comes just days after another scare near the George Bush Intercontinental Airport in Houston, Texas. A Singapore Airlines Boeing 777 flew too close to a Delta Air Lines A320 just before 7pm on Thursday. However, air traffic controllers caught the error and corrected the planes' courses before they could get any closer. The deadliest air crash to date happened in 1977, when 583 people died after a KLM plane collided on the runway with a Pan Am jet amid thick fog at Tenerife airport.

Tourists to Bali increasing The number of foreign tourists visiting Bali increased by 14.82 percent to 1.39 million between January and May, compared to 1.21 million visitors in the same period last year. Data from the Central Statistics Agency (BPS) Bali office showed only 17,394 visitors arrived in Bali through its seaports, while the remainder arrived through the airport. In 2013, the island welcomed 3.27 million international tourists, exceeding the province's target of 2.8 million. The BPS recorded that the 10 largest tourist markets

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for Bali included Australia with 360,111 visitors (25.78 percent); China with 221,106 persons; Malaysia with 86,302 visitors; and Singapore with 68,226 persons. Visitors from the UK increased by 10.73 percent, up from 42,199 persons in January-May 2013 to 46,728 in

the same period in 2014. Tourist arrivals from the US also rose, up 9.27 percent from 40,518 visitors in January-May 2013 to 44,275 in the same period of 2014. Tw o c o u n t r i e s Japan and Taiwan, both previously top contributors to tourist numbers saw a decline in visitors to Bali. Japan only contributed 73,469 tourists from January to May, compared to 80,129 in the same period in 2013. Visitors from Taiwan also decreased slightly to 45,842 persons in the first five months of 2014 from 47,113 visitors in the same period of 2013.

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Makeover Miracles

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014

Aries Mar 21 - Apr 20

Libra Sep 24 - Oct 23

Is there an answer for every question? Some would say there is, despite how much in life can't be explained. If a question can be posed, then it stands to reason that an answer must exist, even if it isn't immediately obvious. Expect this week to find yourself asking a question that appears unanswerable and facing a tense issue for which no immediate solution is forthcoming. By applying imagination, you will discover an answer that offers hope where you want it most.

We have all had 'Eureka Moments'. We know them when they arrive. Something within us tells us we've discovered something that is 'right' because it feels 'right'. We don't feel a need to question whatever has dawned upon us. This week, expect such a discovery. Not only will this shed essential light on an issue that has confused or daunted you for some time but it will make very clear what you need to do to make real, tangible progress where little or none has existed.

Taurus Apr 21 - May 21

Scorpio Oct 24 - Nov 22

Let's talk about 'loyalty' because that word is a key one for you this week. For some time, you have felt pushed toward making a certain decision that doesn't fill you with confidence or your heart with joy. You have a difficult choice to make and it appears that, no matter what you decide, someone will have reason to question your loyalty to them. So where does this leave you? Expect soon to see the benefits of taking a risk or making a controversial move.

If we feel someone or something is pushing us in a direction we're reluctant to go, then we naturally resist. We question how someone or something could know better than we do what's best for us. We resent how what we believe to be essential or appropriate is being overlooked or ignored. But what if we found ourselves pushed in a certain direction we resented and then discovered it was actually a much better option? This week, be flexible and all will be fine.

Sagittarius Nov 23 - Dec 21

Gemini May 22 - Jun 22 Anyone who has placed a bet in a casino knows a decision made cannot be withdrawn or changed. Once made, the result lies in the hands of fate. We know some decisions are the right ones, even if, after moments of tension, fate causes us to think otherwise. This week, you're likely to wonder if a decision made recently was the right one. A risk taken might be causing you to reassess your options. Let the proverbial ball settle. Your instincts haven't let you down.

I read recently a true story about a man involved in a horrendous plane crash who survived with life threatening injuries. He regained consciousness, taught himself to breathe without a respirator and vowed he would walk from the hospital unaided in one year's time. With effort, he did that. Regardless of how daunting your situation might appear, have faith. An amazing result can be yours if you focus on what you truly want and ignore doubts you could be inclined to listen to.

Cancer Jun 23 - Jul 23

Capricorn Dec 22 - Jan 20

Some people enjoy chaos. They feel predictable routines or arrangements are too familiar or predictable and decide it might be fun to shake things up a bit. That's fine for those who thrive in chaotic situations but those who don't tend not to see the funny side. This week, you could feel inclined to 'shake up' a situation to see what the result might be. If you can deal with drama and tension likely to result from doing so, then go ahead. If not, like a wasp or hornet nest, leave it be.

Imagine crawling across a parched desert wishing for nothing more than a jug of water and then discovering in the not-so-far-off distance a huge water park. There you were, anxiously wanting something small that could make a huge difference and now you're being presented with something much grander. Not only can your immediate need be met, so too can many others. This week, prepare to have certain expectations met and exceeded in a wonderful way.

Leo Jun 24 - Aug 23

Aquarius Jan 21 - Feb 19

People often say 'these things are sent to test us' or words to that effect. It's interesting how such words are said with defeat or failure in mind. We might not pass every test but we certainly don't fail every one, either. This week, you are being tested in some way. It's as if the universe wants to test your dedication to a certain cause, project, plan or person. If your belief in someone or something is strong and unquestionable, then you can be assured you will pass with flying colors.

What might be different about this week? Much depends on how willing you are to abandon a 'despite what happens today, I will continue to do tomorrow what I did yesterday' attitude. In other words, how willing are you to remove yourself from a rut or a tired and predictable situation? Coming weeks Expect at least one delightful development if you're willing to take a risk or two. Don't believe effort isn't worth making.

Virgo Aug 24 - Sep 23

Pisces Feb 20 - Mar 20

Let's talk about a particular issue that appears to occupy much of your thinking time. You can identify the problem easily enough. It's the solution that appears unforthcoming. Well, that's not entirely true. You know what you want and need to see happen yet appear to be struggling with the most effective and swiftest way to achieve this. This week, where you have felt confused and even worried, relief is coming. It might be from an unexpected source, but it is coming.

One small, unselfish gesture made to a stranger can transform their day, week, month, year or even their life. We know plans contained within tiny acorns are more complex than any computer circuit board yet integral to the creation of something considerably bigger. This week, prepare to see how powerful that which is small or seemingly insignificant can be. Enjoying a truly delightful and heartwarming experience won't require nearly as much effort as you might think..

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being transmitted to the next generation, said authors of the study , published in the journal Natural Communications. Unlike previous research to distort the sex ratio of populations, this technique is heritable, meaning it can be passed on from generation to generation. "Under field conditions the accumulation of X chromosome damage would significantly

Horoscopes

ari

Researchers at Imperial College London have trialed a new technique to inject mosquitoes with a gene that causes 95% of their offspring to be male. Given that only females of the species bite humans, the technique could suppress or eliminate spread of the disease. The technique works by shredding the paternal X chromosome, preventing it from

contribute to the demise of target populations," the authors said. The scientific community has greeted the findings with cautious optimism, though it remains to be seen how the modified mosquitos would fare in the wild. The threat of malaria looms large over about 40% of the world's population, especially in impoverished tropical and subtropical areas, with between 350 and 500 million people believed to contract the disease annually. Young children and pregnant mothers are particularly susceptible. Prevention methods include insecticide and mosquito nets over beds.

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Malaria, estimated to be responsible for at least 1.2 million deaths per y e a r, h a s l o n g known to be spread by mosquitoes. But scientists now think these pesky insects could also hold the k e y t o i t s eradication.

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Modified mosquitoes spell end of malaria

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The following is a myth busting info page covering different songs or bands each week chosen by one of our many loyal readers, Please Enjoy…Ventures

The Ventures The Ventures are an American instrumental rock band opted out of the group to work at his family's gas station. formed in 1958 in Tacoma, Washington. Founded by Don Wilson and Bob Bogle, the group in its various incarnations has had an enduring impact on the development of music worldwide. With over 100 million records sold, the group is the best-selling instrumental band of all time. In 2008, the Ventures were inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame.

When "Walk, Don't Run" was recorded, he also opted out of the royalties from the recording, taking $25 for the session instead. He later sued to collect royalties but failed because of his prior opt-out.

Needing a permanent drummer for the group after George T. Babbitt, Jr. dropped out because he was not old enough to play night clubs and bars, they hired Howie Johnson and, in the midst of a fast-paced touring schedule, recorded an album to capitalize on the success of the single. The lineup of Bogle, Wilson, Edwards and Johnson remained intact until 1962. The group found early success with a string of singles, but quickly became leaders in the album market. The Ventures were among the pioneers of concept albums (starting with 1961's The Colorful Ventures) where each song on several of their albums was chosen to fit a specific theme. Some of the Ventures' most popular albums at the time were a series of records of dance music. In the early 1960s "golden age of hi-fi", with the novelty of stereo still in its experimental stages, the Ventures found their characteristic style of recording each instrument in either the extreme left or right channel, with little (if any) cross-over, enhancing the stereo effect to its fullest limits.

After watching Nokie Edwards play at a nightclub, they recruited him as bass player. Bogle owned a Chet Atkins LP, HiFi in Focus, on which he heard the song "Walk, Don't Run". Soon, the group was in a recording studio playing the new song, with Bogle on lead, Wilson on rhythm, Edwards on bass, and Skip Moore on drums. They pressed a number of 45s, which they distributed to several record companies. Later, Skip Moore

Got a song request for the page??? Email: tunes@kutaweekly.com

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1 Situated (6) 4 Fleet of ships (6) 8 Automaton (5) 9 Faint (4,3) 10 Excess (7) 11 Armed (anag) (5) 12 Currently (2,7) 17 Fragrant kitchen herb (5) 19 Narrow-edged tooth (7) 21 Precisely (7) 22 Approach to a house (5) 23 Poem with fourteen lines (6) 24 Remained (6)

1 Read attentively (6) 2 Canadian province (7) 3 Praise highly (5) 5 Remainder (7) 6 By oneself (5) 7 Harvest season (6) 9 Future generations (9) 13 Artist's mixing board (7) 14 Give evidence (7) 15 Convent head (6) 16 Chum (6) 18 Blemish (5) 20 Military trainee (5)

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Their instrumental virtuosity, experimentation with guitar effects, and unique sound l a i d t h e groundwork for innumerable groups, earning them the moniker "The Band that Launched a T h o u s a n d Bands". While their popularity in the United States waned in the 1970s, the group remains revered in Japan, In 1961, Edwards, a talented guitarist in his own right, where they tour regularly to this day. suggested that Bogle's lead guitar abilities were being Don Wilson and Bob Bogle first met in 1958, when Bogle stretched, and that they were in essence wasting Edwards' was looking to buy a car from a used car dealership owned talents by keeping him on bass. Bogle agreed, and rapidly by Wilson's father. Finding a common interest in guitars, learned the bass parts to all their tunes, allowing Edwards the two decided to play together, while Wilson joined Bogle to take lead guitar. This move would prove vital in performing masonry work. Initially calling themselves the modernizing the band's sound, ensuring success in an Versatones, the duo played small clubs, beer bars, and ever-changing market well into the late 1960s. private parties throughout the Pacific Northwest. Wilson played rhythm guitar, Bogle lead.

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Clothing And Accessories - All Mechanical Repairs - Big Bike Rental God A girl brings her boy friend home to meet her parents. After dinner, her mother tells her father, a business tycoon, to find out about the young man. He invites the boy to his study for green tea. "So what are your plans?" the father asks the boy. "I am a religious scholar and want to marry your daughter" he replies. "A scholar," the father says. "Admirable, but what will you do to provide a nice house for my daughter to live in, as she's accustomed to?" "I will study," the young man replies, "and God will provide for us" "And how will you buy her a beautiful engagement ring, such as she deserves?" asks the father. "I will concentrate on my studies," the young man replies, "God will provide for us." "And children?" asks the father. "How will you support children?" "Don't worry, sir, God will provide," replies the boy. The conversation proceeds like this, and each time the father questions, the boy insists that God will provide. Later, the mother asks, "How did it go?" The father answers, "He has no job and no plans, but the good news is that he thinks I'm God.

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the Man's face was severely burned. The doctor told the Husband that they couldn't graft any skin from his body Because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate Some of her own skin. However, the only skin on her body That the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. Owing to the sensitive nature of the situation...they all agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from. After the surgery..... everyone was astounded at the man's new face. He looked more handsome than ever ! All his Friends and relatives raved about his youthful appearance.....especially his mother! One day, while alone with his wife, and overcome with emotion at her sacrifice. He said, 'Dear, I just want to thank you for everything you did for me. How can I possibly repay you?' 'My darling,' she replied, 'I get all the thanks I need every time I see your mother kiss you on the cheek.'

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Games Corner

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Play A Round The Swede's wife steps up to the tee and, as she bends over to place her ball, a gust of wind blows her skirt up and reveals her lack of underwear. 'Good God, woman! Why aren't you wearing any skivvies?', Ole demanded. 'Well, you don't give me enough housekeeping money to afford any.' The Swede immediately reaches into his pocket and says, 'For the sake of decency, here's a 50. Go and buy yourself some underwear.' Next, the Irishman's wife bends over to set her ball on the tee. Her skirt also blows up to show that she, too, is wearing no undies. 'Blessed Virgin Mary, woman! You've no knickers. Why not?' She replies, 'I can't afford any on the money you give me.' Patrick reaches into his pocket and says , 'For the sake of decency, here's a 20. Go and buy yourself some underwear!' Lastly, the Scotsman's wife bends over. The wind also takes her skirt over her head to reveal that she, too, is naked under it. 'Sweet mudder of Jaysus, Aggie! Where the frig are yer drawers?' She too explains, 'You dinna give me enough money ta be able ta affarrd any.' The Scotsman reaches into his pocket and says, 'Well, fer the love 'o decency, here's a comb.....Tidy yerself up a bit.'

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Baby's First Doctor Visit A woman and a baby were in the doctor's examining room, Waiting for the doctor to come in for the baby's first exam. The doctor arrived, and examined the baby, checked his weight, and being a little concerned, asked if the baby was breast-fed or bottle-fed. 'Breast-fed,' she replied. 'Well, strip down to your waist,' the doctor ordered. She did. He pinched her nipples, pressed, kneaded, and rubbed both breasts for a while in a very Professional and detailed examination. Motioning to her to get dressed, the doctor said, 'No wonder this baby is underweight. 'You don't have any milk.' I know,' she said, 'I'm his Grandma, but I am glad I came.'

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KUTA WEEKLY REAL ESTATE GUIDE

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10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

Jalan Kampus Unud 23a, Unit C, Jimbaran Bali 80361. Tel: 0361 895 3633 or 0361 788 9803

Jalan Kampus Unud 23a, Unit C, Jimbaran Bali 80361. Tel: 0361 895 3633 or 0361 788 9803

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This villa features modern Balinese-style accommodation with a private pool, sun terrace and a landscaped garden. A 10 minute drive from Jimbaran Bay, boasting an open concept living and dining area, comes with a fully-equipped kitchen and a private terrace overlooking the pool and greenery. A flat-screen TV is included. En suite bathrooms are semi open and equipped with shower facilities. A 20-minute drive from the property takes guests to Ngurah Rai International Airport and Nusa Dua area. http://www.balicoolproperty.com/property/details/13

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For Monthly or Longer term rentals we have a wide range to suit all budgets Available for monthly or yearly rental in Tanjung Benoa for prices at US$3,500 per month or US$36,000 per year. This villa is in a small street in Tanjung Benoa (Nusa Dua) meaning you are close to walking to many restaurants, shops, beaches and numerous large hotels but that you also have the peace and tranquillity of you own place! http://www.balicoolproperty.com/property/rental/66

GUIDE PRICE AUD$295,000

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This well designed airy house makes you feel relaxed and serene just on entering the property. Through the large gate from the road is ample parking area and storage areas leading to the main door with stepping stone across the water feature into the main house with opens to a large high ceilinged room housing the kitchen and living areas. From this are large patio doors leading to the patio and 4 m x 8 m swimming pool. http://www.balicoolproperty.com/property/details/62

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10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

10 Jul - 16 Jul 2014 (396)

Kuta Town Houses

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Email:mattgilit@ozemail.com.au


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