COMICS • TV LISTINGS •
MONDAY, OCTOBER 28, 2013
DUSTIN BY STEVE KELLEY & JEFF PARKER
kpcnews.com
Girlfriend racks up bill of resentment DEAR ABBY: I am divorced, successful, and the father of two teenage girls. I have been seeing my girlfriend, “Stella,” for a year and a half. She also has two teenage daughters. When we met, Stella’s divorce was becoming final, and her house was near the tail end of a foreclosure. The sheriff removed her from her home a few months later. I bought a couple of condos and let Stella choose one she wanted to move into. She agreed she would pay the bills and some rent once she settled in. Two weeks after she moved in, she quit her job. It has been almost a year, and she hasn’t gone on one job interview. I pay all her bills now, and I’m getting resentful. It’s not the money (I’ve got plenty), but I feel she
FOR BETTER OR FOR WORSE BY LYNN JOHNSTON
GARFIELD BY JIM DAVIS
BLONDIE BY YOUNG AND MARSHALL
continues to see me only so she can live rent-free. Our communication isn’t the greatest, and she gets angry if this topic is brought up. How should I approach her without sounding like a cheapskate? DEAR — DON’T ABBY WANT TO BE A SUGAR DADDY IN Jeanne Phillips CHICAGO DEAR SUGAR DADDY: Of course she gets angry! Have you never heard the saying, “The best defense is a strong offense”? If you want to resolve this, you must be prepared for Stella to react negatively. Start the
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conversation by saying, “When you moved into my condo, you agreed to pay your own bills and some rent. It’s been a year, and you haven’t even looked for a job.” Then give her a date by which you want her to move out. Because she has been living there for some time, she may have certain tenant’s rights that will have to be respected. It doesn’t take a crystal ball to see that you will probably have to evict her -- so talk to your attorney before you discuss this with Stella. DEAR ABBY is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Write Dear Abby atDearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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OCTOBER 28, 2013 6:00
On this date Oct. 28: • In 1886, the Statue of Liberty, a gift from France, was dedicated by President Grover Cleveland. • In 1962, Soviet leader Nikita Khrushchev said he had ordered the dismantling of missile bases in Cuba. • In 2003, the seven astronauts who died in the Columbia shuttle disaster were honored with the unveiling of their names carved into the national Space Mirror Memorial.
THE BORN LOSER BY ART & CHIP SANSOM
Help is available for overtaxed caregivers care of yourself: • Always accept help when it’s offered. Create a list of very specific things that you would love to have help with, so you can request something specific when help is offered. • Tap into religious communities. A religious ASK or spiritual DOCTOR K. community can be a strong source assistance Dr. Anthony of if you or the you Komaroff person are caring for belongs to one. • Support groups are a good place to share ideas and experiences with other caregivers. There are quite a number of support groups
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for caregivers on the Internet. Just type “caregiving support groups” into a search engine. • Look for government-supported services. You might be surprised by how many services your father may be eligible for. These are services provided by local or state governments, or by the federal government. Ask your doctor for the name of a social worker who can work with the two of you. Particularly if your father is on Medicare, he may be eligible for help in cleaning the home, personal hygiene, and even “Meals on Wheels” delivered to the home. • Stay connected. Catch up with friends regularly. Establish a weekly walk with a friend or an occasional lunch or movie. • Clear your schedule. Set aside a regular time to spend with your partner or family, away from home. • Stay active. Try to get 30 minutes of moderate exercise
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Almanac •
DEAR DOCTOR K: I’m the primary caregiver for my ill, elderly father. I’m exhausted and upset all the time. What can I do to lighten my load without costing us much? Neither of us is well off. DEAR READER: You’re not alone. Approximately one in five American adults helps an elderly or disabled family member with the daily tasks of life. This caregiving runs the gamut from grocery shopping, cooking and cleaning house, to helping with baths and personal hygiene or providing hands-on medical care. That’s often in addition to caring for other family members and holding down a paid job. Caregiving may be one of the most worthwhile jobs you’ll ever undertake, but it can be exhausting. It can cause immense strain, which may lead to depression and health problems. Here are some budget-conscious tips to help you take
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a day, most days of the week. • Enjoy yourself. Listen to music, enjoy a luxurious bath, take a yoga class or do a jigsaw puzzle. Regular time off can renew your spirit and energy. If you don’t take care of yourself, you won’t be in very good shape to take care of your father. • Ease stress. Learn meditation or other relaxation techniques. I have never had to be a caregiver for a member of my family, but many of my patients have been in that position. Their personal sacrifice and dedication inspire me. But sometimes they need help to lighten their load. Often that help is available, but they have to be proactive to find it. DR. KOMAROFF is a physician and professor at Harvard Medical School. His website is AskDoctorK.com.
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