2 minute read

VIVE LA DIFFÉRENCE!

God made each of us to be unique, writes Gary Clayton, and this is one reason why we should recognise, acknowledge and celebrate our differences

for others. For introverts recovering from a hectic schedule, experiencing stress or coping with bad news, seeing lots of people requires more effort and may even be uncomfortable.

Extroverts, forced to view church services online because of age, injury or ill health, will miss out on fellowship far more.

So, if we’re to love our neighbour as ourselves, we should grant introverts the space they need when they need it and ensure that extroverts receive the human contact they require.

Some people are sympathetic, empathetic, highly intuitive and emotionally intelligent. They are people who readily sense the mood, concerns, needs and feelings of others – and respond correctly. Others are not.

On one occasion, my wife suddenly told friends: “Oh, I had no idea it was so late! We better get going!”

Later, in the car, I asked: “Why did you do that? We were having a wonderful time!”

“But they were yawning!” she chuckled. “Your friend could hardly keep his eyes open, and his wife nearly nodded off! They couldn’t wait for us to leave so they could get some sleep...”

But I never noticed!

So let’s respond appropriately to the needs of those around us – valuing others above ourselves and not looking to our own interests or needs but to the interests of others (Philippians 2:3-4).

And, while some are ‘thinkers’ who generally set emotion aside and concentrate on the facts, others are ‘feelers’ — people with a tendency to think with the heart more than the head, and who react more emotionally to things.

I remember an old boss (fortunately not from my current employer, MAF) who coloured everything I wrote with voluminous amounts of red ink and never said anything about the bits she liked.

Rather than realising how demoralising this was, she thought she was doing me a service by helpfully highlighting my ‘errors’.

As my Hungarian friend, Akos, once commented: “You showed her your soul, and she just crushed it!”

At the end of the film Toy Story 3, there’s a scene where the now grown-up Andy gives his toys to little Bonnie, who then plays with them as the young Andy once did.

Now, although it’s arguably an emotionally charged scene, I was genuinely shocked to hear a gut-wrenching sob coming from the cinema audience – particularly when I realised it was coming from me...

Am I a ‘thinker’ or a ‘feeler’, I wonder? Our model, of course, should be Jesus – the One of whom Isaiah 42:3 says: ‘A bruised reed He will not break, and a smouldering wick He will not snuff out.’

If Jesus is our Brother, then, however different we are, there should of course be a family resemblance.

Appreciating the differences, working through them, and making allowances should hopefully draw us all closer together.