The Streamline Method – Communication
“Congratulations, you’re one step closer to the door.” When I accepted a manager position with a Fortune 50 company, that’s how I was greeted. After they announced that I would be the new PM Operations Manager at the location, an employee walked straight up to me, looked me in the eye, smiled and said those words to me. The employee was embittered and felt that he should have been the one hired. He didn’t even apply for the position because he was told that the Senior Manager would never promote from within the location. When he said those words to me, I smiled back and laughed, but I knew what he was saying. He knew that the position I just accepted was the most difficult job in the company and that I had no clue how difficult the journey would be. He was right on two points, the middle manager position is the most difficult job in the entire company and I was definitely not prepared for the journey. We was wrong, however that I was one step closer to the door as it has been over 24 years now. I have learned several things over the years that I would love to share with you in this book. The operations manager job is the most difficult job in the entire company; change my mind. Throughout my career, I have noticed natural born leaders in the hourly position that I have approached and ask them if they would be interested in getting into management. The most common responses I get is that it is too stressful, the the hours are too long, there’s too much pressure and you have pressure from upper management in addition to the pressure from your employees. It’s just not a desirable position for some people. This book is dedicated to those managers that took the risk or
are thinking about taking the risk by stepping into the middle manager role. Most step into the role wanting to make a difference either in their own life or the life of the employees and my goal is to help you get there. Over the years, I have learned that communication is a dominating factor to your success in middle management. When communication breaks down, many problems are created adding to your stress, overwhelming you with work and making you want to quit. Poor communication will place you “one step closer to the door” if you are not able to get it under control. The
Streamline Method of Communication will help you become a master at communication which will decrease stress, increase work efficiency and open doors that are not the “exit door”. We know that when a leader communicates better, less problems exist, employee engagement increases and the leader is recognized as an expert in the field. Strong communication is a much needed area if you are going to survive in this very challenging role.
The Streamline Method – Communication Communication is an untamed beast that we must never let off its leash. It is untamed in that it can be incredibly useful to us or it can make things go completely off the rails. It is a beast in that it is difficult to control or deal with at times. The leash is The Streamline Method of Communication that will enable you to keep your communication useful to you and others by keeping it under control and easy to deal with. The Streamline Method is a systematic approach to communication that will heighten the awareness of the leader by fully understanding how communication affects everyday situations and determines success or failure. This book will address: The skills needed to communicate effectively
Understanding the various forms of communication and how to use each form effectively
Understand the methods of communication and when to use them effectively
Define the Hierarchy of Communication and how to leverage it when communicating
How to connect with all types of audiences with your communication
Eliminate wasted time by reducing message distortion
As a middle manager, strong highly effective communication will enable you to survive a fast-paced work environment and enable you to make a name for yourself as a strong leader. There is a methodology to keeping this beast under control. Although, I am convinced that it is impossible to fully tame this beast, you can keep it under control with the effectiveness of your communication. One caveat to this method is that it is difficult to control the communication of others which can be the biggest waste of time. Using The Streamline Method of Communication will enable you to communicate at a higher level and lessen the impact of wasted time from the inefficiencies of others at the same time. Poor communication can create more work for you or others, break down the trust needed to drive solid results and frustrate employees leading to high turnover rates. If you want to be successful as a leader, you must focus on your communication and take the time to develop strong communication skills. The first step has already been taken in that you purchased this book. The next step is to apply The Streamline Method of Communication to your daily life. Once you do, you will experience great satisfaction and less frustration in both your personal and professional life. The goal is to help you to
communicate at a higher level and greater efficiency so you can increase your work-life balance.
Essential Communication Skills
Communication is a key part of success at work and in other parts of your life. Top leaders practice and master five basic communication skills that enable them to communicate effectively. Mastering these five skills will not only enhance your communication, but save you time in trying to communicate or dealing with problems that arise from miscommunication. Luckily, you too can learn and practice these same skills and use them immediately.
Methods to practice essential communication skills
Learn to listen
Top leaders know that listening is a crucial part of communication. Learn to love listening and engage in the stories of others. Try to pay attention during a conversation instead of being distracted by your phone or other devices. No one enjoys a conversation where the other person is being distracted often. A person that cannot focus on you or the conversation at hand gives off the impression that they do not care about you or what you have to say. Honestly, it’s one of my pet peeves. I’ve actually stopped telling a story after being interrupted multiple times by distractions the other person was experiencing and never finished the story. Till this day, the story is untold to that person and my respect for that person diminished greatly. They had no idea that I stopped mid-sentence and never continued. You will not gain the trust and respect needed to be successful if you cannot listen. Have one conversation at a time giving
your full attention to each person. Practice repeating the person’s story to let them know you are listening. Everyone wants to be heard, especially in the workplace. Other employees will notice that you listen and will be more apt to open up to you. When you listen to them they will go away from your conversations knowing that you care for them and that you value them when all you did was listen. Story-tellers want feedback while you are listening and it encourages them to continue. Using phrases like, “I see.”, “I understand.”, “I hear you.” will keep you engaged in the conversation and encourage the story-teller to keep going. When the story-teller is finished, paraphrase the story back to them by saying “What I hear you saying is…” or “I get that you want/need… Is that right?”. It is vital that two things are accomplished during the interaction; the leader must understand the intentions of the encounter and that both the listener and the storyteller agree on the action or message before moving on. When these two things are established, greater trust is built between the two individuals and communication becomes more open and fluid. Building trust breaks down many barriers to communication. Anytime I take over a new workgroup, I randomly ask individual employees, “What is the one thing you need the most from me?” The answer I get most often is “A million dollars”. I am constantly asking my employees, “What do you need from me?” or “Do you need anything?”. I’m reminded of an certain employee who always responded with “a million dollars”. One time, he actually did need something from me and when he was done asking, I replied, “Well, I had that million dollars for you, but I guess you don’t need it now.”
Secondary to “a million dollars” is “trust”. The number one thing employees need from you is trust. They need to trust that you are telling them the truth, that you have their best interest in mind and they can open up to you. Since I earn slightly under the amount needed to give each employee a million dollars, I work on earning their trust. There is a lot rolled up into earning trust from your employees than we can cover in this book, but communication plays a huge role in initiating, developing, maintaining trust.
Listen to all kinds of communicators
Some employees come to you with ideas and questions. Some come only to complain. I've learned that employees with complaints need to be able to express their frustrations just as much as any other employee. The tendency is to disregard the employee as a complainer and shut them down without giving them the chance to express themselves. There is usually a sliver of truth in their complaining that needs your attention. Further, complainers may be representing other employees. They may be willing to say what others are thinking and may be way off base or completely wrong. But those other employees may be influenced more by the complainer than by the truth. The last thing a leader wants is to disengage several employees all at once. Actively listening to all kinds of communicators will build trust between you and your employees.
So how do you handle the complaining employee?
I like this quote from Abe Lincoln, “How many legs does a dog have if you call his tail a leg? Four. Saying that a tail is a leg doesn't make it a leg.” This is so true. Just because someone tries to change the definition of something, doesn’t change what that thing is.
Somehow, this has become a common practice in society today. Especially in Politics and Social networks. To think that it does not exist in the workplace is making a huge mistake. Employees try to get away with a lot by changing the definition of something, but changing definitions won’t change reality. An employee came to me concerned that the workplace had turned into a “hostile work environment”. A true hostile work environment must meet certain legal criteria, according to the U.S. Equal Employment Opportunity Commission (EEOC). An environment can become hostile when:
Unwelcome conduct, or harassment, is based on race, sex, pregnancy, religion, national origin, age, disability or genetics Harassment is continued and long lasting
Conduct is severe enough that the environment becomes intimidating, offensive or abusive
Obviously, her comment concerned me and I wanted to hear more. I invited her in my office to discuss what is going on. She was a brand new employee and was having trouble getting a long with a peer that had many years of experience with the company. When I asked her a lot of fact finding questions, I learned that she was part of the problem. In fact, she told me that she flat out ignores anything her peer was saying to her whether it was work-related or not. She didn’t engage the other employee in the most basic of human interaction by saying, “good morning” or “hello”. She admitted to not listening to her peer on procedures that the experienced employee was trying to teach her. Something happened between the two employees that needed to be resolved and quickly. I listened to her and then met with the other employee. As the
other employee opened up, it became clear that the environment was not hostile at all. No one was being intimidating, offensive or abusive and no unwanted conduct or harassment was taking place. The “hostile work environment” was simply two people who misunderstood each other and both shutdown. This could be easily resolve by getting them to communicate and work together. Sadly, many managers do the same thing, they try to manipulate employee perception by changing the definition of something instead of calling it what it is. The employee’s perception is their reality and negative perceptions must be dealt with completely. Most often, an employee’s concern is not necessarily reality; basically saying, “the dog has five legs”. When an employee claims something is true, your goal is to find out if the concern is true or just perception. Your goal is to get them and everyone to say that the dog has four legs. So when employees come to you with a conflict or concern you’ve got to think critically. Don’t jump in and say, “Yep, the dog has five legs”. Listen critically and listen to understand. Try to resolve the issue by focusing on reality. How many legs does the dog truly have? If they’re thinking five legs, your goal is to get them to see four. You want to bring them around to reality. You do this by listening to understand and thinking critically. If they’re right, then you are the one seeing five legs and it’s your perception that needs to be brought back to reality. The goal is to get everyone to agree the the dog has four legs.
There are two ways to address a complaining employee. After listening to understand and thinking critically, you must act on the truth. Seek to resolve or solve the issue at
hand with the individual or individuals affected by the concern or complaint. The other way is to address the issue with the entire workgroup to clarify the misunderstanding. If you apply the appropriate response to a complaining employee, you might gain the support of that employee and shut down the false claims. Both results are the desired outcome. The key is addressing the issues on a regular basis. Do not avoid the difficult conversations and be completely transparent.
Listening with empathy
I would completely miss the mark if I taught on listening without talking about empathy. Listening to understand is listening with empathy. Many leaders think that showing empathy happens during the conversation only. However, empathy without resolution is leadership self-destruction. You may be a great listener and you might even genuinely care about your employees, but if you have empathy with no resolution, you might as well not listen or care at all. Many managers make the mistake of not taking care of the little people issues that arise. They may focus intently on the big operational issues that are plaguing the day or the moment, but fail to spend the time addressing people concerns. Being in tune with your workforce means addressing all the people issues that are brought to your attention. This can be a daunting task, but failure to resolve the little issues will cause employees to cease coming to you with their problems no matter how big or small. They will tend to reach out directly to HR, a peer or someone higher up the chain of command rather than going to you first. Once a manager gets to this level, it is nearly impossible to recover fully. There will always be that lack of trust between your employees and you. Always listen and act or listen and correct.
A few years ago, I had an employee that was downright mean. I often joked that if you looked up the word "mean" in the dictionary, a picture of his face would be right next to the definition. He was mean to existing employees, new employees, managers, and even customers at times. He was very disliked among the other employees because most of them experienced his wrath. This is how much he was disliked, one morning while everyone was working in the building, he started to have a major heart attack and collapsed. Management quickly went into action and called 9-1-1. When the First Responders arrived, they were able to stabilize him enough to get him to the nearest hospital. As they were rolling him out on the stretcher, employees were saying things like, "Can I have his route?" aloud so he could hear them. He was not well-liked at all. He had a lot to say and none of it was positive. As part of my responsibilities, I had to do quality checks that would require me to work with him all day and observe his work methods. At first, I dreaded when he was due for his quality check. One time, a peer manager knew that I was performing his quality check that day and asked me if I was ready. I jokingly said, "Yep, I stopped by Jamba Juice and got a smoothie with a boost of tolerance and patience". Over the years though, I learned to listen to him and have open direct dialogue with him about the issues he was having. The key is the open and direct dialogue. I was brutally honest with him and he was brutally honest with me. I learned a lot from him. He helped me tremendously in understanding the work environment and how the employees were feeling about their jobs. I remember him saying several times at the end of the quality check that he appreciated me listening and talking to him about what was bothering him. He gained greater trust and respect for me as time went on as he saw that I listened with empathy, but with action behind
the listening. He liked that I just didn't tell him what he wanted to hear to make him go away or quiet down. Too many leaders treat the negative employees this way and it only exasperates the issues. They are a gift if you listen with empathy.
Methods
to dealing with a negative employee
Listen & act or listen & correct
Find the sliver of truth
Be open and direct
Don’t run from or dismiss the issue – deal with it
Continue to seek out their input
Listen to yourself – Self-Reflection
Actually, I want to encourage you to not listen to yourself until you have mastered the methods of positive self-reflection. I know that I just said listening is a key tool to communicate effectively, but now I want to talk about not listening. Do not listen to your negative personal self-talk. No doubt, as a leader, you will be constantly faced with making difficult decisions. Whether it involves discipline, navigating through a critical situation or terminating someone’s employment. After the decision is made, the tendency is to go into this internal mode of self-talk. It’s perfectly normal to look back at the situation to re-evaluate what took place. In fact, you should always re-evaluate. Just like everything in business, never make it personal. The same applies to your selftalk, never make it personal. No, the decision you made does not make you a bad
person. No, it doesn’t mean you are a bad manager or an incompetent leader. No, not everyone hates you now. Learn to not listen to those negative personal thoughts. However, do listen to your critical thinking. Practice thinking critically back through what took place. If mistakes were made, fine, just don’t repeat those mistakes. You should always learn from your mistakes. In some cases, you have to do, what I call, damage control. Doing damage control is critical thinking in action. It’s where you realize the impact of what just took place and see the consequences then take action to minimize the impact. There also may be times when you need to own up to the mistakes. It is best to admit the mistakes, face the consequences, learn from them and move on. Most importantly, it is critical that you make sound solid decisions in the first place. What if it is your boss that constantly drives you to think those negative thoughts; like multiple times a day? Look, many people are going to criticize you and your performance or even your team’s performance. In fact, if no one is criticizing what you are doing, then I have to ask if are you doing anything worth while. Name one leader that made an impact who doesn’t or didn’t receive negative criticism. The number one thing to remember is do not let it be personal. You are in control of your thought life. The tendency is to make it personal; it’s just business. Now, if your boss truly is making it personal and not performance based, that’s different and you probably need to seek additional help. But what is criticism anyway? It’s simply an opinion, usually negative. Right? So you have to ask yourself, “What is the basis of this opinion?” Opinions are formed from situations, knowledge, attitudes, values, perceptions and outcomes. However, negative criticism in the workplace is born out of an absence of or an
ignorance about one or many of those factors. If your boss forms an opinion and doesn’t know the situation, he or she can be critical of you when they would have handled the situation exactly the way. This is why communication is key to your success. Understand this and use negative criticism to move you forward, not backward. Use it to make a decision. Maybe you need to redo, reset, re-evaluate or reinvent something. Maybe, just maybe, you need to simply hold the line and continue driving towards your goal. Successful leaders know how to leverage negative criticism and their self-talk as compasses to point them in the right direction. There is more information on this in the Intrapersonal Communication section of this book.
Enhancing Self-reflection
Listening to yourself is a form of self-reflection. The key is to think less about me and more about the we. Self-reflection must not only include how you see yourself, but how others might perceive you as well. Leaders are always under the microscope. Employees are always watching how you handle every situation. Reflecting back through a situation with the “we” perspective will enable you to better understand your thoughts, emotions and experiences. This will help you be more aware of them, learn from them and increase your self-awareness.
Methods to increase self-reflection:
Talk to yourself (not out loud and never argue, LOL)
Read inspiring quotes or books and apply to your leadership development
Write out your thoughts
Barriers to helpful Self-Reflection:
Arrogance – Don’t overvalue yourself; it will cloud your perception
Time – Set aside time daily to reflect on your performance
Time – Set aside time daily to reflect on the impact you had on others
Self-Reflection is a “must do” for great leadership. It will enhance your ability to understand the value that you bring to your employees and the company. It will enhance your ability to listen with active empathy and strengthen your communication.
Avoid slang and informalities
It's normal to use slang or other types of informal language while talking to friends or family. However, business usually requires a more formal language set. Pay attention to who you're talking to and make the necessary adjustments. Slang, acronyms and informalities can make some people feel uncomfortable, especially if they're not familiar with them. This is crucial when communicating with or training a new employee. Most businesses use acronyms or abbreviated terminology to reference business functions, processes, positions or equipment. Be intentional to know when to use them and when to avoid them to communicate better.
Acronym Example
Try deciphering this message: “The HPR Report is showing a weekly percent of 97.5%. This is clearly below goal and we will need to enter a CAP in the GRC system. We have 10 days to complete the CAP to be in compliance with the DAT CSM requirements”.
Well, do you know what the message is saying and what you need to do? Unless these terms have been made clear to you, you have no idea what the message is saying and what course of action you need to take. Too often, we speak or send out messages like this and we assume those receiving the message know and understand all the acronyms and will take action. Some receivers of the message will ask you for clarification and some will not. Some will be completely paralyzed by the message because they don’t understand it and they don’t ask out of fear they might look ignorant. This leads to communication gaps that can be devastating to the operation. Knowing your audience will help you overcome this issue.
Abbreviation Example
Two drivers out in Oklahoma needed to meet up to pass off some packages because one driver needed help. The driver that was available to help the other driver sent the following message: Where do you want to meet up? The other driver quickly responded, “B OK”. So the driver willing to help drove to the nearest Bank of Oklahoma and waited for the other driver to arrive. After sitting there for more than 30 minutes and getting frustrated, he sent another message, “What is your ETA?”. The other driver responded, “I said I would be ok.”. This illustrates very simply that use of abbreviations can make a negative impact rather quickly. The driver willing to help was already frustrated that he needed to stay out later to help an underperforming peer. He just wanted to go home after finishing his own route, but ended up getting home later because of a lack of communication.
Slang Example
An employee approaches his manager requesting the day off. The manager checks the availability and seeing that the day was full with the maxed allowed people off, he says to the employee, “Sorry Charlie, the day is full”. The next thing the manager knows is HR is calling him asking questions about the racial slur he used towards one of his employees. Unbeknownst to the manager, Mister Charlie is a disparaging expression formerly used within the African-American community to refer to an arrogant and domineering white man. Occasionally, it refers to a black man who is perceived as "acting white". “Charlie” is also a term used in the military for an enemy soldier. In this case, the employee was both black and retired from the military. What seemed to be a harmless cleaver response borrowed from a 1960’s commercial (Starkist Tuna) turned into an HR investigation because the manager chose to use informalities to respond to a simple question about a day off. I know this may sound petty, but you have to be mindful of the words you choose. I promise you, you will back yourself into a corner if you are not aware of the words you choose.
Informality Example
Informalities such as using sarcasm, someone's nickname or abbreviated name are the most common in the workplace that can lead to issues. Sarcasm is an informality in business communication that can work for you in making you likable, but it can be devastating if you are not careful. Most people who use sarcasm, use it to be funny, to make a point or both. However, sarcasm can be used against you if you do not have a solid relationship with your employees. The trust level between the leader and the
employee must be extremely high to present no risk of backlash over the comment. I’ve seen sarcasm go completely south when the sarcasm was actually meant as a compliment.
An employee was having trouble with her electronic device because the battery was dying. The employee had an extremely busy day and needed to have a battery taken out in the field to her so she could continue. The manager asked a peer employee to take a spare battery to her and made the sarcastic comment, “I can’t imagine why she needs a battery, it’s not like she was THAT busy”. Keep in mind, this employee is a hard-working employee that had one of the busiest days of the year. She was already behind on her work because of the battery issue and she was feeling a lot of stress. Now, we do not know exactly what the employee said to her when he delivered the battery, but he definitely did not put the sarcastic comment in context. When she completed her work and returned to the building, she blew up at the manager. Earlier in the day, she also volunteered to work extra hours doing a job that few people want to do. She was giving discretionary effort and going above and beyond for the company by volunteering to cover a shift that is difficult to cover. This all flew out the window over the sarcastic comment and she left stating that she didn’t want to cover the extra shift. This left the manager scrambling to cover at the very last minute. The manager most likely ended up having to cover the shift himself. All this over a comment that was twisted to a negative meaning vs. an acknowledgment of a hard-working employee. Words without context can be damaging and sarcasm rarely helps. If you like sarcasm and you use it often, I offer the following rules:
Methods for using sarcasm
Know the trust level you have with the people involved
Use sarcasm about someone only when they are present in the conversation
Understand that sarcasm works only when the context is intact
Sarcasm can be twisted to mean something completely different
Using sarcasm always comes with a risk
With all of this in mind, be hyper-aware of your words. If you have been promoted from within the company, be mindful of your use of slang and informalities. When you go from peer to boss in the same work environment, some things use to be okay to say and now they are not. A lot of new leaders struggle with this and end up getting into trouble or into situations that compromise their integrity or trust simply by the the words they choose. Learn to be professional in all communication and you will establish respect and trust rather quickly.
Methods to avoiding slang and informalities
Know when to use them and when to avoid them
Know your audience and how they will receive the use
Always be mindful of the words you choose
Consider the trust level you have with the receiver
Be professional in all your communication
Focus on being brief
Top leaders know that you don't have to make a long speech to be effective. Practice being brief and getting your point across with fewer words in less time. People appreciate brief concise conversations and respect others who don't go off on tangents, especially on conference calls and in meetings. However, ensure you're still providing enough information while you speak. You don't want to be vague or miss important details. Otherwise, your communication will be ineffective and will cause issues. The whole point of this book is to avoid that from happening. Being brief may take time to develop, so practice it often. The next time you have a conversation, try to get your point across with less words. Try to summarize the important parts and only focus on them and the conversation at hand while you talk. There's more information on this skill in the Three Considerations Before Communicating chapter of this book that will help you with this skill. Pay attention to other's emotions
When you talk, take note of how the other person is reacting. Words are powerful and communication can affect people in many different ways. Whoever said, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” was incredibly wrong. The saying was intended to be used as a defense against name-calling and verbal bullying. I get that, but words can certainly affect people in permanent internal ways. Even if you have no intention of offending an employee, you may say the wrong thing or word something in a way that they take offense. I like the quote, “The blow of a whip raises a welt, but a blow of the tongue crushes the bones.”. Keep this in mind especially if the
conversation is a difficult one or you see the person getting agitated. There’s another popular quote saying, “People will forget what you say, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” I agree with this to a certain extent. How you make people feel is largely based on what you say or do. For me, what is said to me is remembered more than what is done to me especially if it wells up my emotions. It’s like my mind takes a mental picture at that moment in time and that picture appears when the memory is recalled. I can almost give you every detail of what my mind saw at that moment. The look on your face, the color of shirt you were wearing, the location where it took place and your exact words is recalled from my memory. Like me, some people will keep your words locked away in their minds so be mindful of the words you speak. As some added help, you may want to learn a little about psychology to understand emotions better and how to read people. Nonetheless, show sympathy and empathy when it's appropriate during a conversation. Look at things from the other person's point of view without criticism or judgment. Emotions can change the course of a conversation in a positive or negative direction. They can also control what will be said and how it will be received. Avoid having conversations when you are emotional. This can skew your better judgment and you might say things you will regret later. There are all kinds of physiological techniques out there to assist with emotional conversations and how to handle certain emotional situations. We will not get into all that in this book, but you do need to be mindful of the obvious like deferring emotional conversations until both parties have the right mindset. I realize that may not always be possible, but do
your best to defer. At best, hold a quick brief conversation and then set aside time to meet again to discuss further. If the conversation is regarding an investigation, it is best to discuss it entirely so that they cannot collaborate on or fabricate the story. Be charismatic
Communication is easier for charismatic people, this is true, but you can learn this skill. One of the most important aspects of charisma is confidence, but not arrogance or selfrighteousness. Confident communicators know their value and worth, but they're also respectful of others. A good definition of charisma is being attractive to others and being able to influence them. However, don’t confuse charisma with charm or likability.
Charismatic people can influence people whether they like them or not. Charisma is about others which is the essence of Servant-Leadership.
Another facet of charisma is optimism which is a big part of communication. Even if you're having a difficult conversation, focus on something positive. Top leaders are good at finding the silver lining and leveraging that to spark interest and influence. Find something to compliment others about. This will show them that you like them and are interested in what they have to say. Invite them in the conversation by being curious about them, look them in the eye, have an open posture and smile. Make people feel at easy when talking to you and they will open up to you on many levels.
Charismatic communicators are interesting, they also share interesting information and can do it by captivating others. Story-telling is often a method they use to communicate
and captivate their desired audience. They focus on innovation and new ideas that give people a spark to create movement. There is an infectious energy about charismatic people that draws others in and inspires them to act. However, they don’t necessarily try to appeal to all people. They understand that likability is not the goal, but interest and influence is. Appealing to everyone eventually appeals to no one. They give all they’ve got, they are “all in” and they make you feel alive. Charisma is a flame burning inside that can be seen on the outside drawing people in who have the desire to catch that flame as well.
How
to be charismatic:
Obviously suggestions of making eye contact, leaning in towards people, having open body language, good posture, smiling, gesturing will aid in making you more charismatic. Learning to be more charismatic will not happen over night. Even if you did all the things mentioned above, you still need to work on other characteristics that take time to build, but can easily be added to your repertoire. They are:
Be confident – Understand your value and how you can use it to help others
Be self aware – Know how your personal desires, opinions and tastes affect others
Have integrity – Stand firm in your values and principles
Take action – Have a mission, passion or vision; go somewhere
Be curious – Think for yourself and don’t believe everything you are told
Be all in – Have a flame burning in you that will spark a flame in others
Expand your comfort zone – Push yourself beyond your limits
Be unpredictable – Use innovative ways to connect with others
Master Story-telling – Learn the art of Story-telling to captivate others
A person who has charisma is someone who is able to combine the things charismatic people do with who charismatic people are. Work on this and you will develop the charisma that is needed to communicate at a high level.
The Goal - Building affinity as a communication agent
As humans, we are highly communicable beings and have a plethora of ways we can communicate, yet one thing that every business faces is communication breakdown. Strong concise communication builds affinity between the company's goals and the frontline employees. The ability of leaders to effectively communicate is directly proportional to the ease with which they meet those goals. With entry-level and midlevel managers having the most difficult job in the entire company, they cannot afford to lose time trying to communicate. Getting Upper Management and the frontline employees on the same page is difficult to do unless you have solid communication skills. The Streamline Method will get you there.
Understanding the communication gap
No matter what business you are in, there is a gap that exists between upper management and the frontline employees. In that gap lies the ability or the inability to drive employee engagement. How you fill that gap determines the ease in which you will
get things done and increase employee engagement. There are three main realities that you must face to drive the results that are expected from you.
Upper management thinks everyone is "all in" at all times
Employees think upper management is out of touch with the field You stand in that gap
Let’s talk about what upper management wants from their frontline employees. As far as I know, there is only one being that was able to speak things into existence. However, upper management seems to think this is possible. They think at a higher level; not that they are smarter than all other employees, but that they see more of the bigger picture. They are usually more privy to information about the company and the direction the company is going than their frontline employees. Therefore, they think differently. Their thoughts are often about newer, better, stronger, more efficient and so on. Their thinking spans out both upward and outward. When they look at the business upward, they are looking down from 35,000 feet up. They have to see everything and how everything connects with the overall goal and mission of the company. When they look at the business outward, they are looking at least a year or more down the road. With this perspective, they make decisions that we might not understand right away. A middlemanager needs to understand this and we have to get good at connecting upper management thinking to the frontline employee’s execution. Upper management want the following from their frontline employees:
Efficient productivity – Get things done efficiently
Camaraderie – Get along with others
Flexibility – Be able and willing to pivot when needed
Initiative – If you see something say something or do something
Trust – Honest days work; show up and give your best
The middle manager must know how to get the 5 things above from the frontline employees on a daily basis. They do this by managing the gap. Frontline employees want the following from their upper management:
Trust – Freedom to do their job without management getting in the way
Communication – understanding who, what, where and why
Active Empathy – Listening and taking action on concerns
Adequate training – Take the time to teach, coach and mentor
Challenges – Set attainable stretch goals
When some or all of the above structures are missing, employees will feel their manager is out of touch with them. Leaders must constantly work on these things in an effort to keep them engaged. One or more missing structures is hard to recover from so they have to be established from the beginning. Standing in the gap with poor communication skills will not drive solid results. This is how a manager gets to the point where only threats and consequences drive the results. This will not stand the test of time and will bring on several undesired indirect consequences. The consequences manifest themselves in high turnover, employee resentment, increased workload and diminishing work-life balance for the middle manager. You will end up spending the majority of your time following up on employees with disciplinary action and terminations. Those two things are my least favorite things about being a manager or leader.
Types of Communication
There are several different types of communication that we can use to get our message across. If we are going to build affinity between the frontline employees and upper management, we have to know these different types and effectively use each type appropriately according to the situation. So what are the types?
Types of Communication
Intrapersonal
There are seven components that exist in all types of communication. It is crucial that you understand these components in order to select the type of communication you should use for each situation. Anticipating the effect each component will have on your communication is the key to selecting the correct type for maximum impact. We will go over each type and identify the recommended uses of each type as well as ineffective uses. But first, let’s cover each component of communication.
Components of
Message – The actual content
Distortion – The inherent bias
Response – The action
At the beginning of this book, I claimed that communication is an untamed beast that we must keep on its leash. Communication is untamed because all components have to work together to get the message to the correct person as intended by the sender. As the sender of most messages in the workplace, you have to get good at understanding and considering each component before you communicate. Knowing and selecting the correct components will aid in communicating at a high level. This is a learned ability and those that master it will find great success.
Sender – This component is the communicator its self. Whether it’s you, the organization or another person, the sender is simply the source of the communication. The intent behind the message originates from the sender or source. This is crucial to understand as the intended message is why the communication was created and sent in the first place. High-level communication is grasping the message as the source intended and relaying the intended message to the receiver with no distortion. The other components should aid in keeping the intended message pure through to the receiver. Selecting the right components for the communication will determine the purity of the message received.
Receiver – This component is simply anyone who receives the message. The receiver is the key as it will dictate the channel, context, message, potential distortion and
response. You have to anticipate what the receiver will receive and how the message might get distorted. Whether they were the intended audience or not. The receiver then does two things with the message. They can either send it back out to others or internalize the message by keeping it to themselves. No matter what the receiver does with the message, it is crucial that the message is received as intended from the sender. This is exactly why communication is untamed. Since communication is an untamed beast, it must be kept on a leash. The leash, in this analogy, is using all the components correctly to get the message from the sender to the receiver without any distortion. As you can imagine, this is difficult to do consistently.
Channel – This component is the medium through which the message is transmitted. There are many different channels we have available to transmit a message. It can be verbal, non-verbal, written or visual. It can also be auditory (a sound) or olfactory (a smell). With so many channels available, it’s easy to select one that is less effective than another one. You wouldn’t want to use an email to communicate the sudden unexpected termination of an employee. Although Elon Musk just did this very thing. Although, the message he intended was not simply ending someone’s employment, he was sending a broader message to a certain political group. Just like asking someone to marry you via email, using the wrong channel to communicate can have devastating consequences. Choose wisely.
Context – This component is the environment or setting in which the message exists. It answers the questions, Who, What, Where, Why and How? Understanding the context will strengthen your message wether you are the source of the message or passing the message along. In the corporate world, you will be faced with relaying various types of
messages to your employees. The context surrounding a message may not be clear. It is your responsibility to grasp the context so that the intention of the message remains pure. In order to do this, you have know about and understand The Four Connectors of Communication that will be discussed later in this book. Let me explain it like this. Think of your organization as a universe. Each division, department and job position is its own little world. Inside each of those worlds is an environment or setting unique to that world. Now think of communication as transmissions moving back and forth to and from those worlds. As the communication is sent from each world, it will have the context of that world. However, it will be interpreted according to the environment or setting of the receiving world. Let me give you an example. If HR sends out a communication, the context will most likely be about employee relations. Basically, how it affects the employee. If Engineering sends out a communication, the context will most likely be about numbers and budgets. Along the same lines, employees live in their own little world. Knowing their world and being able to communicate in their world without losing the intended message is grasping the context. To master context, you have to understand each world the communication will impact and alter the communication to fit each world’s context.
Message – This component is the actual message itself. It is not limited to words only. The message encompasses the methods of communication as well. We cover the methods in detail later in this book, but the methods include spoken words, written words, punctuality, pictures, gestures, body language, facial expression, voice tone, voice volume, sounds and silence. One or more of these methods will determine the message that is communicated. Improper use or conflicting methods can distort the
message and create havoc on your ability to communicate. Although your words may be the right words to communicate the message, your methods can change what is communicated entirely.
In theatrics, there’s a common exercise actors go through to help them understand how simply changing the emphasis on one word in a sentence can change the entire meaning of the sentence even though the words are the same.
Repeat the following sentences aloud one by one with emphasis on the word in bold:
Can you help me please?
Can you help me please?
Can you help me please?
Can you help me please?
Each sentence communicates a different message based on what we place the emphasis on. This is one example of how one method affects the message. With many methods available, you have to be mindful of how you use these methods. The right methods with the right message will strengthen your communication an drive great results.
Distortion – This component is the act of twisting or altering a message out of its true, natural, or original state. Distortion involves inherent bias. Every sender and every receiver has inherent bias. Wether we like it or not, we must be aware of the biases. As the sender, you have to acknowledge that you have biases. In the professional world, you must keep your biases in check. Your biases may be strong personal convictions, that’s fine, but they cannot get in the way of your communication as a leader. You saw how easily a message can communicate different messages. Now add in distortion
(biases) and you have the perfect storm that reeks havoc on effective communication.
The good news is that you can control your biases and most distortion from the receiver can be predicted if you are in tuned with the receiver. The better you know the receiver, the better you can anticipate how the message might get distorted and you can take evasive action prior to communicating. Evasive action is the ability to align the right message using the right methods to the targeted receiver. This will reduce the chance of distortion.
Communication distortion comes in two forms; intentional distortion and unintentional distortion. Both forms can come from either the sender or the receiver and can come from both the sender and receiver. Distortion is another reason why I say that communication is an untamed beast that we must keep on a leash.
Leaders should not use intentional distortion to manipulate their employees. Employees will see right through the distortion and trust will be compromised. Always communicate truthfully and timely to gain the trust of your employees. Trust is the number one reason employees distort messages intentionally. Wether they are communicating up, down or horizontally, the level of trust between the two parties is directly proportional to the level of distortion. There are too many factors in play when communicating that cause unintentional distortion to add in intentional distortion will make communicating even more difficult and create more work for you. Distortion creates more work in the forms of doing damage control to clarify a message, creating additional communication to clarify a previous message or correcting work done incorrectly.
Employees will distort messages intentionally. There are several reasons employees distort messages. They include, but are not limited to the following reasons:
1. To push their own agenda
2. To put themselves in a positive light
3. To put a peer in a negative light
4. In retaliation for discipline received
It all boils down to trust. The more an employee trusts their peers, management and upper management, the less likely they will be tempted to distort the message. Employees also distort messages unintentionally. Most employees distort messages by mistake. They either were not listening or they didn’t understand the message so they passed it along with unintentional distortion. This is why it is so important to study communication and how to use the forms, components and methods effectively.
Response – This component is the action behind the message
Intrapersonal Communication
“Intrapersonal communication can be defined as communication with one's self, and that may include self-talk, acts of imagination, visualization, and even recall and memory”, (McLean, 2005 ). What you tell yourself is critical. This type is widely talked about in our culture today. Self-talk is very important to your confidence and realizing your dreams. The current trend is to think about who you are and not what you do. The thought is like, "I think this way because I am a leader and leaders think this way." When meeting people for the first time, we tend to ask them what they do for a living. The typical response is, "I work for… or I do". Your intrapersonal communication needs to reflect who you are; a leader. You can even take that thought even further by saying, "I'm a leader that has the unique ability to ____ (fill in the blank). The issue is that most managers do not see themselves as a leader nor do they think like a leader. The
essence of a streamlined leader is having the ability to balance thinking like a manager and thinking like a leader. Developing this balance is crucial to building affinity. The
Streamline Method - Idealistic Ethos addresses this issue for new managers who need to understand the correct mindset they must have to lead effectively.
Self-talk is unique in that
Interpersonal
Another form of communication that is critical in building affinity is interpersonal communication. Simply put, it is the transfer of information between two or more people. There are several things you need to consider when communicating with this form. Except for Intrapersonal communication,
Let me give you an example of how easily a message can be distorted even though you might feel you are communicating effectively. The receiver's perspective is critical to the message being received as intended. During a meeting with one of my managers, I needed to communicate to him that I was taking a week of vacation and asked him to cover me while I was gone. I verbally said the dates, I pointed to the calendar on my wall and ran my finger back and forth over the dates I was going to be off. At first, he acknowledged the dates, but then said, "Wait, is your finger moving on the dates or is your finger underlining the dates above?" See how easily a receiver's perception can distort the message? Even though the message was verbal (apparently he wasn't listening), visual and illustrated, it still needed clarification. I would never have thought
someone would take my gesture differently than my intention. This also illustrates that one method of communication can distort the intended meaning as well. This is why the sender must be hyper-aware of all attributes of communication to communicate on a higher level. Again, it is a learned ability.
Organizational
This form of communication speaks to the culture and environment of the company. Even though an organization is not a living breathing organism, it still communicates a message. As the leader, you play a vital role in projecting the organizational message. The culture and environment depend on your proper and timely communication. Culture and work environment drive employee engagement and retention. The leader sets the tone. You have to buy into the philosophy of the corporation to support the mission as a leader should. This means you may have to hold back your true feelings when communicating down. Always communicate a positive message and be sure to include the benefits or the “why” behind the communication. The "why" is the key to others grasping the concepts. When communicating up, you should be able to express your true feelings on the matter. Be certain that upper management is willing to listen. If you are in a work environment where your direct boss is not willing to listen to constructive feedback, you might need to seek employment elsewhere.