Lifecycle Death and Mourning When a Jewish person dies, there are clear directions as to how things should proceed with regard to the body, the burial, the funeral and mourning. The concept of honoring the dead is reflected in all Jewish burial customs. Burial takes place as soon as possible, sometimes within 24 hours after death, or as shortly thereafter as relatives can gather for the service. There is a mitzvah to join a burial society (chevra kadisha), which ritually prepares the body for burial, and to sit with the body (as a “shomer,” or guard, between the time of death and the burial). While always tragic, the Jewish rituals around death, funerals and mourning recognize that grieving and recovery after the death of a loved one is a long and gradual process. The process begins with shiva – seven most intense days of mourning; then shloshim – first 30 days of mourning; and aveilut – year of mourning. While one is an avel (mourner) for a full year for immediate relatives, one only says kaddish for the first 11 months of the year. The unveiling consists of removing a veil to reveal the tombstone in a relatively short ceremony marking the gravestone’s dedication. Yahrzeit is the anniversary of the day of death, often observed by saying kaddish, giving charity (tzedakah) in memory of the deceased, and visiting the grave. It is considered a mitzvah is to mark a grave with a stone. Each mourner adds a stone to the collection on the grave. Judaism reminds us that there is permanence amidst the pain. While other things fade, stones and souls endure.
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RESOURCE GUIDE 2022 | OREGON JEWISH LIFE
Shalom Bayit:
Achieving peace in the home By Sherri Curley
