THE OVERRUN
Dear (insert motorcycle brand here), phone, headset, camera -- to chat with each other, via an app speaking Stop. Please stop. through a motorcycle can feel a lot I understand that you are all power- like that. Except that are a myriad of houses of science, technology and ways for things to fail. Usually when engineering. You are all extremely you need them most. And none of it capable of creating machines with is actually necessary. incredible levels of performance and Every one of these platforms require style. In fact, I don’t know that I’ve ever hopped on one that I didn’t like, the rider to have both a phone and a helmet mounted communicain some way or another. tions device (headset). To be able But your proprietary apps that you to heed those turn-by-turn direcrequire us to use are terrible. At tions, music or podcasts and be best they are a passive go-between able to bark orders back at Siri or to kinda, sorta, almost make inter- Google, the headset takes centre actions between my device and I stage, functioning just like those easier. At worst, they are nothing AirPods that have made Zoom and but gimmicky bloatware. Teams so tolerable. And if you don’t Sure, the argument to let riders feel like yelling at the voices in your tweak their bikes features and head, the switchgear on the headsettings wirelessly, to control media set will gladly skip tracks, answer playback, to get that GoPro running calls, adjust volume and any other and cue up a trip route sounds number of desired things. cool in the R&D war room -- “It’s modern, plays into the trends and tendencies of those all-important youth customers and when they start to associate our motorcycles with their phones, we have truly conquered all!” -- but none of them work as well as you wish.
MATTHEW NEUNDORF CONTRIBUTOR | TRQ
56
So why do I need my bike, and your app, to work as an intermediary? “To see your mapped route!” you say. A $50 mounting device handles that. It has already for years.
“Ahh but what about when it rains?!?”, you cry. “Our TFT screens For those of you that don’t ride or are waterproof!”. Well I’ll grant that haven’t had the pleasure of these that is handy, but I’ve yet to lose a idiosyncratic routines, I’d ask you phone due to inclement weather, to think back to the early days of thanks to pockets. Bluetooth connectivity in your fourwheeled conveyances. Remember So please, just stop. Or, if you must how trying it could be to facilitate have something techy to brag about, that connection? How often it do what Honda has done: embrace would drop, in the middle of a call? both Apple and Google as the interWell, getting two or three devices -- face overlords that they already are.
