DEC 2017
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Hackin’ The Net By Ted Fleischaker / Publisher Ah, December. This is usually the column where we suggest a few useful and fun electronic Christmas and Chanukah gifts. And we will do that in just a bit, but we could not let the new iPhone X launch come and go without at least a few comments, so here those are. If you want to see the gift guide, just scroll or read down past these first few paragraphs... or read the whole thing. The New Phone: Button, button...who’s got the button? In the case of the new iPhone X, Apple does and they ain’t givin’ it back! That’s probably the biggest change (aside from that easier to read brighter and larger screen, better camera and more) that buyers of the “latest greatest” from Apple will notice.
tioned charging pads for any friends or family who got a new iPhone 8, 8+ or X . Plug it in and it painlessly and wirelessly recharges that phone, which is little short of amazing. To move on from the phone, another fun gift we’d recommend this year is a bluetooth speaker. They come in all sizes, shapes and colours and pricing is from under $10 to hundreds. You can get one at everywhere from the Apple Store and Best Buy to Target and even your local Rite Aid. We have two we acquired in the past year or so and they work with the computer, most mobile phones and tablets to allow streaming of music, news, radio or anything else to them so long as they are within a few feet. One of our most used is an “aqua” model we paid under $30 for on Amazon and which attaches with an included suction cup to the inside of our shower. It’s water resistant, meaning it can be in the shower, but don’t put the stream right on it! We use ours to stream (pun intended), Classic FM from the UK or the BBC Radio 4 programmes we love while we wash our feet. Of course, you can pick your own favourite music or talk, but the fact it works great in the shower is a fun benefit and keeps our iPad high and dry in the next room.
As of this writing, I have had my iPhone X (Please don’t dare call it an “exe” --it’s a “ten” my Apple friends command!) for a little over two weeks. That’s given me time to get used to the lack of a home button, figure out the new gestures one uses to control it (after one gets over giving the phone that rude finger gesture for making such radical changes) and overall sort out how to do what I used to on my “old” 7+ and a lot more. Probably the loss of that home button has been my largest hurdle to overcome. I am an old guy, so I tend to get set in my ways, but there has been a home button on the iPhone since the first ones came out in 2007. The iPhone 8, which hit a few weeks before the X, also has one, but this is that brave new world they talk about, so waking the phone means raising it from horizontal, tapping the screen, or if you have it turned on, facial recognition. That’s right: Hold it (after you initially set it up) so it can see your face and it recognises you and will come alive and unlock. I tested it on a few friends and indeed it knows my grumpy face every time, so applause for that but scary in a way because it’s getting so close to that artificial intelligence we all keep reading about. It’s got some other interesting features, too, including this great volume reducer. I am half deaf and used to miss calls, unless I turned my ringer up full --- much to the displeasure of those around me, especially in quiet restaurants. Now, I leave the ringer up full with my fave Irish tune as a ringtone and when it starts, all I need to do is lift the phone. When it sees my face it immediately knows I have the message that there’s a call and cuts that rather obnoxiously loud volume by 80% so my disturbance to others is reduced!
We have another speaker (below) which does stereo on the night stand and which has way better quality than the phone or even the iPad Pro speakers. Both of the ones we have are rechargeable (as are all we have seen) and will deliver pretty good sounding tunes (from Bach to rock) for three to 15 hours without needing to be plugged in for a recharge. The only down side (to us) is both “talk” when you pair a device with them. The bedside one also says it’s turning off after it detects no sound from what’s paired to it for 15 minutes. That’s great for battery life, but not so good because the voice announcing the turn off is a distraction and --- if we’ve used the sleep timer on our iPad --- usually wakes us. Wish they had a “shut up” switch for that!
I know there are going to be a ton of other things I will be writing on the phone in upcoming columns --- from the gestures to go between apps, the no longer needed closure of apps once you finish with them and more, but I’d be remiss were I not to say I love the wireless charging it has. You can plug it in if you wish thru the lightning port, but for a few bucks you can order a pad for that desk or night table. Put your iPhone X down on it and it charges wirelessly. Gone are my mornings after I fell asleep and awoke to find a dead phone. Pretty cool and a real convenience. More on the phone another time, but let’s look at some gifts as the holidays approach... First, not to totally change topics, one neat gift (we paid about $20 for ours on Amazon) that’s not even too pricy this year would be one of those aforemen-
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Moving right along, another great gift for an electronic fan is anything that works with whatever computer, phone or tablet they have. This sounds like a funny thing to say but (and I say it often when it comes to gifts by and from friends who ask for advice) make sure what you buy will “fit”. I mean you’d not buy a pair of shoes for someone unless you knew their width and size, so do not plan on a case for someone’s laptop, phone or tablet
without first making sure that will fit correctly. This means know their make and model number or get a gift card so they can select one that “fits”. That said, there are literally hundreds of options for all of the above and more, ranging from a couple bucks to a couple hundred plus. I will note that often, when it comes to cases and covers, one gets what one pays for. I recently dropped my phone when I forgot it was in my lap and it fell out of my car on Commercial Street. Despite landing screen down (Are they like buttered toast and always land butter side down?) I had a few cracks and scratches in my screen cover but nothing to the phone itself. $3 for a new glass cover and it was 100% back to normal, so the case did it’s job and protected my iPhone from stupidity, which is always good. Also do not forget that stocking stuffers and Chanukah small gifts are always welcome at this season. A few examples (at right): cables, chargers and even (for things without rechargeables) packs of batteries. It’s amazing to me how many modern devices have remotes which still use good old AA or AAA batteries, so a pack of each would fit nicely into those small gift lists. Of course, on the other end of the scale, you could buy someone a new tablet or computer --- but be warned: this is a thorny minefield so do not get burned. Buy a p.c. for someone used to Mac and you may be dead in the water. The same if your friend or relative is a p.c. person and gets an iPad. Change is not always bad, but if you are spending hundreds (or even more) for a really wonderful gift, it pays from day one to be sure the recipient will use and enjoy what you buy. Remember gift cards (see below) are out there, or make your own and slip it into a Christmas or Chanukah card. Maybe a note which says what you’ll be shopping for together (tablet, computer, TV, etc.) and that the recipient and you will also have lunch or snack in the bargain. It will for sure be a memorable occasion and one that 100% assures they get the exact gift you intend! And that brings my two final bits of advice I always offer in these gifting columns: 1.) Buy from reputable dealers and check things like return policies. Also remember a sad lot of merchants hang on thru the holidays and then call it quits. Almost always, when a business says they are done, the first thing they do is quit honouring their gift cards. I still have ones for Borders Books and Circuit City somewhere in my junk drawer, so be warned --- they can end up not worth the plastic they’re printed on and are always best used promptly.
That means a late night Christmas Eve run thru the drugstore or gas station may yield what looks like a great stocking stuffer which will, when plugged in, be utterly useless. Keep your receipt and don’t make that gift one which injures or kills its recipient. Buy at a name store or website and be sure what you are getting is a genuine article. Just remember you can save a few bucks shopping Target, Reny’s, Marden’s, Ocean State Job Lots or their ilk and still be safe so this does not mean you need to go to the Apple Store, Best Buy or shop Amazon --- it just means to look for the approval (below left) info on packaging before you buy gear and shop aware. And on that note, we will say a happy, merry and joyous whatever you choose to celebrate ... and here’s to more great electronics in 2018!
2.) There are a lot of fake and dangerous items floating around when it comes to electronics. I read almost daily stories about cheap chargers which shock folks and catch fire or cables which don’t meet standards and won’t work. There are also counterfeit, unsafe items, from TV sets to digital alarm clocks. It’s not well known but the major tech firms (Apple and others) have built protection into their pads, phones and other gear. If they have not inspected and approved say a cable or charger as safe, it simply will not work on their equipment.
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Food For Thought... Call this one the best of times and the worst of times, as we delve into a couple of spots with less formal meals and what should be less formal pricetags: Clayton’s Cafe in Yarmouth and the still new-ish Rose Foods on Forest Avenue. Let’s start at Rose and with what to us was the oddest thing: Imagine the Indianapolis 500 with no fuel or wheels for the cars. Or the U.S. Open with no tennis balls. Maybe the World Series with no bats or the Superbowl without goal posts. Incomprehensible you say? Well, to us so was the fact that our recent visit to Rose Foods, the new deli over at 428 Forest Avenue, revealed a deli menu with no corned beef! As Jewish Midwesterners who relocated to Maine in 2015, we are used to the deli Shapiro’s in Indianapolis, which has been around since 1905 and in the same family since day one to boot. And we have done all the classic delis (still existing and lamented) like New York’s Carnegie and Stage, Orlando’s Ronnie’s, South Florida’s Two Jays and Wolfie’s and it becomes all the more confusing. It was made worse by the shock at our question on the part of the lady at the counter on a recent Wednesday, who acted when we asked where the corned beef was on the menu that she’d been less surprised if we’d asked her to run naked through the store. A deli without corned beef is like all those events we mentioned earlier or like a Maine with no Fall leaf peepers or Portland Head with no light --- to us, anyway, unthinkable. Once that shock wore off, we did decide to stay and I ordered a Pastrami on Rye, as did my dining partner. A long-time lover of (and maker of) matzo ball soup, I opted for a bowl of that as well, and he did a soft drink. Next shock was the bill for the above: $46.98. Add the $4 we left as a tip (one orders at a counter in the very sparse looking eatery and items, once prepared, come to tables so 20% is not called for) and it was a $50 lunch. Now things these days at Shapiro’s, Two Jays and many of the other delis mentioned and not are not cheap. Good corned beef and pastrami are pricey (Shapiro’s, below, is getting $13+ as of this writing for either or a combo sandwich with both), but there are any number of Portland lunches one can get for half that $50 for two we paid at Rose and come away smiling. Sadly, we found
this Rose at best wilted and at worst as dead as last week’s bouquet. The food was a touch past OK, with the pastrami piled high, but a real deli would have had pickles on the table or a whole slice alongside the sandwich, not given me a couple bite-size bits on my plate. And what can I say about the sandwich aside from while the pastrami was delicious, the bread tasted like it was from the Hannaford down the street and had a consistency as limp and non-crusty as most of the governor’s excuses for how he runs the state. Cummon’ guys: Get a deal with Big Sky or Standard or a true bakery for real rye bread with real crust! Really! The mustard, while Guilden’s, was not on the table in a squeeze bottle or even on the sandwich, but in two packets on my plate, as one would expect for the condiments at Mickey D’s or something of that fast food ilk. Oh, and that matzo ball soup? Great broth and real, huge pieces of chicken floating right there, along with noodles and carrot, so extra points for that, but demerits as it came in a cardboard container and while OK, at $8 a portion it had just one rather large, but pasty, ball. I could do a lot of puns --- mostly adult toilet humour --- about the ball and all, but I’ll just say I make these often at home and I do a way better job, including eating my matzo ball soup out of a real china bowl (or mug) and making sure they are light. My matzo balls win me my friend Marian’s award for “best balls anywhere”.
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Shall I say I was disappointed at Rose’s matzo balls and presentation in cardboard and leave it at that? Looking over the rest of the menu and the plates of the diners seated nearby, I gather that Rose Foods is trying to be something between a deli and a bagel shop, but from my observations, they are not hitting either one too well. Their bagels looked OK (next time, if I go back) but I am pretty committed to the excellent ones from either Union Bagel up on Cumberland Avenue or Scratch over in SoPo, so if they are trying to break into that crowd they face an uphill battle for sure; not to mention Mister Bagel and his pals. Add in the sterile atmosphere in the dining room (think cafeteria in your elementary school or scene from a prison movie) and sorry folks, but at $50 for two, things need to be a whole, whole lot better in many, many ways. I am aware that Rose Foods is still fairly new (August). I also am aware that the owner has had a lot of well-deserved comments of a positive nature for his Palace Diner in Biddeford, but I am painfully also convinced of what a deli should be. What was on my plate and how much the whole mediocre experience cost... not to mention all the really neat lunches we could have had for around (or under) the same price at local spots like Duckfat, RiRa, Dock’s Seafood or even pizza slabs for a week from Micucci’s and more in Portland and I left less-thanthrilled. This reviewer does not wish to pile on the insults or disappointment, but in addition to all of the above. Rose is positioning themself as a breakfast or brunch place with hours from 7 a.m. to 2 p.m. Wednesdays thru Sundays, though the website at www.rosefoods.me confusingly says open seven days as of 4th December, but above it says Holiday Hours, so it’s unclear if that seven days is Please Continue On The Next Page
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More Food For Thought... Continued From The Previous Page from now on or now thru New Year’s or what. Meanwhile, to hear comments about the place from folks I know in town (and those at the synagogue I attend) what I experienced on my recent visit is pretty much what they are seeing and feeling, too: So-so food, missing menu items and other-worldly pricing. Like that Indy 500 or Superbowl example I gave, I arrived full of excitement and expectation at Rose Foods, and I left $50 and an hour later disenchanted. I hope honestly they can make changes and pull it off, but until they do I’ll continue to do my own corned beef and matzo ball soup at home or enjoy it on trips to the “big city” or Florida... or back to Indianapolis, where Brian Shapiro, his dad, Mort, before him, and his grandpa before him have been doing delicatessen right since 1905. Deli is one genre where sadly, foodie mecca Portland just does not seem to get it. Switching gears, a food choice Portland does understand, and the towns around do, too, are the many eat-in or carry-out places with good salads, soups, sandwiches and more. And while we have found some great eats like these at Big Sky Bakery, Portland Food Co-Op, Liquid Riot, Urban Sprouts and their ilk, as well as locales in South Portland and Scarborough, a recent need to go to Yarmouth took us to Clayton’s Cafe & Bakery. In an unassuming building at 447 Route 1, Clayton’s is a clear winner for neighbourhood gathering place. We were there once in the Summer while a friend grabbed a carry-out salad, and found the outdoor patio and the dining room both jammed. This time, the patio was done for the year and inside had even longer waits for tables and food --- all totally deserved and worth it. What the staff at Clayton’s turns out is definitely worth the drive to Yarmouth,
too... besides, they are just a few feet off I-295 so from downtown Portland to the parking lot was just a tad under 20 minutes, and that’s obeying the reduced speed limit of 65 along that stretch of the Interstate. Once there, the huge menu on the wall is easily interpreted, especially as we had a five-minute wait to get to the head of the ordering line and tell the smiling lady there what we wanted. The better answer would have been “One of everything!” since we saw nothing which was not excellent in appearance on anyone’s plate, but having to make a choice, I opted (below left) for the Maryland Crab Cake Sandwich (Menu says: “Our own Maryland-style crabcakes with lettuce, tomato,
red onion, and lemon-dill mayo,” $8.95) and my partner (who behaves better than I) did a garden salad (above) with grilled chicken ($7.50). There was not a single thing negative to say about either. The salad was more than ample with flavour to boot, and the crab cake on white garnished well with the mayo and tomatoes went down very happily. Add a soft drink from one of
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the many cabinets around the room for him, plus a bag of Fox’s Family Chips (my fave) and we still got out the door for a bit under $24 --- also very happily. Stop and let that sink in a minute. The Clayton’s lunch was about half the price we’d paid a few days prior at Rose, had all the taste and more the latter was missing, not to mention Clayton’s has free parking in their lot at the door and at Rose you are on your own along a busy stretch of Forest Avenue. Probably the only thing Rose has going for it that Clayton’s does not is Sunday hours, though they are open Monday thru Friday from 7 a.m. to 7 p.m. and Saturdays 8.30 a.m. to 5 p.m. Clayton’s also is a bakery so things in the cases and on the shelves look a whole lot better and fresher than those at half the spots we choose to have lunch in Portland. To see the whole menu and read more, visit www.claytonscafe.com And one further note: those muffins, scones and cinnamon buns which Clayton’s has listed on their menu for breakfast sound really, really tempting, so look for me there some morning shortly after they open at 7. There’s nothing like a good cinnamon roll and I wanna put their version up against the Baker’s Bench ones I get at Coffee By Design many days. Something says the contest is gonna be close! Bits & Bites... Nights are now for eating at the Portland Pottery Cafe at 118 Washington Avenue as after the breakfast and lunch menus get put away, the space transforms to Lena’s Italian Comfort. New menus with the likes of Eggplant, Veal and Chicken Parmesan, all manner of salads and Pasta dishes and desserts (including Tiramisu and Cannoli) appear Thursdays thru Saturdays from 5 to 9 p.m. with a “family style Italian dinner” advertised on Sundays from 4 till 8. We have yet to get by and try Lena’s, but if the Pottery Cafe’s usual great lunches are any indication, it’s on our “to-do” list as soon as we can waddle over after all the good eats we have enjoyed the holiday season thus far... And finally, all the Winter changes have hit the Peninsula’s food scene. The outdoor heat and awning sides are up at Duckfat; Portland Lobster is shuttered till Spring; Two Fat Cats Bakery has closed on Mondays (though Pot Pies are back); and December brings the Winter discount deal at Gelato Fiasco. For the unfamiliar, Gelato Fiasco in Portland and Brunswick both offer a percent discount for every degree the outside temperature is below 32 from the first day or Winter in December until the final day in March. Best deal this reviewer got last couple years was a frigid dessert with the temp at +3 degrees so we got 29% off the bill! Watch the weather and get your red spoons ready! Up Portland Is A Proud Member of the
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Up Portland is edited in Portland and printed the last week of every month in Portsmouth, New Hampshire. We may be contacted at the e-mail or phone number below. While every effort is made to ensure accuracy and fairness, the publisher assumes no responsibility for errors. Liability is limited to the cost of said ad. Ads not cancelled by published deadlines may be billed at agreed-upon price. Ads may be edited or rejected for content at the discretion of the publisher. All items appearing in Up Portland, as well as the name, logos and design are copyright 2017 by BBS, A division of High Speed Delivery Fork Ltd. & Ted Fleischaker and may not be reproduced in any form without prior written approval.
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Holiday Time In Maine Welcome to Up Portland’s monthly crossword. And this time, we pay tribute to the holidays. From Christmas trees and menorahs to fruitcakes and from chestnuts roasting over an open Maine fire to sugar plums, you will find it all here. You’ll find a lot of familiar (and maybe a few notso) words here, all having to do with the season of holiday gifts, cold winds, Nor’easters, snow and Bean Boots. Be sure you put on that thinking cap, since while some are as easy as hugging Santa, others are a bit more difficult --- like trying to figure out which of the eight correct spellings of that Winter Jewish holiday we will use. Sharpen your pen or pencil and as always, comments are welcome at ted@upportland.com and the solution (no peeking) is on Page 15. Oh, and from all of us, have a happy, merry or joyous whatever you celebrate!
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The Entire Community Is Invited To Join Us Sunday December 17th @ 4 p.m. For A Chanukah Party & Raffle To Benefit The Maine Jewish Museum & Etz Chaim Synagogue We’ll have lots of Latkes & Donuts, as well as face painting for kids of all ages! There will also be music, brilliantly-lit menorahs (including our 3rd floor artist menorah show) dreidels, and maybe some Chanukah gelt as well! And we will be drawing the winners in our Chanukah Raffle, which benefits the Maine Jewish Museum & Etz Chaim. No raffle ticket yet? Visit Us Online at www.mainejewishmuseum.org or drop by the museum weekdays 10 till 4 or Sundays 1 till 5
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Sauntering With Mat
By Mat Robedee / Up Portland Commentator
The Autumn colours were soon going to fall upon the forest floor and my days of hiking mountaintops without Winter gear were limited. I awoke early on a Sunday morning and felt a buzz for adventure in the air. I took this as a sign that I needed to stand on one more peak before the season came to a close. So I busted out my boots, packed a lunch and began loading my car with gear. The day was oddly warm and as I was packing, my roommate (aka “sister from another mister”) must have felt the same vibe as me. This is because within a minute after seeing one another and discussing plans for the day, she packed up a bag, jumped in the car with me and we were off. The two of us may have travelled down very different trails throughout life, but I’m grateful for the one that brought us together. It is a wonderful thing for someone you click with so strongly to also have such a thirst for adventure and a love of mountain tops. I have done an incredible number of hikes in the White Mountains. If you follow my writing you know this by now. Hiking is therapy for my soul and I have scrambled up many peaks around the globe. Yet the Presidential Range in New Hampshire always seems to steal the show. Other than Mount Katahdin in northern Maine, the mountains making up the Presidential range are the only other place in New England which radiate such a massive and other-worldly feel. I suppose it’s my own treeless, boulder strewn and at times brutally windy slice of heaven. We decided that day to summit Mount Jefferson; named after the third president of the United States. It also happens to be the third highest mountain in New England. Resting at a rugged 5,712 feet, Jefferson is one of the numerous mountains making up the Presidential Range in New Hampshire. These peaks are amongst the tallest of the White Mountains and are notorious for having some of the worst weather recorded on Earth. I remember being 18 years old and summiting Mount Washington for my third time on a day the wind was so fierce that while I stood on the summit I had to lean fully into the wind, as if I was trying to fall forward, in order to not get knocked backwards on my butt. The trail we took up Jefferson on this sunny day may have been advertised as being one of the shortest hikes up a peak in the Presidential Range, but this did not mean it was the easiest. Within the hiking community, the shortest route up almost always also tends to be the steepest. And the steepest can also be the most dangerous. This was something we were fully aware of, but we decided to go for it anyway. After several hours of a quad-burning, lung-pumping journey, we reached the summit. With a 360 degree view, including that of Mount Washington, we finally sat down, rested our sore feet, and enjoyed a well-earned lunch together. While soaking up the sunrays and admiring the view, we noticed a young lady Please Continue On Page 18
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Continued From The Previous Page make her way over to an outcrop of stone and strike a pose. In her hands she held a piece of cardboard with the number “48” scribbled on it in black Sharpie. Her two friends began taking photos of her and afterward they all popped open mini bottles of champagne and shared in a toast. It was shortly after that we had a discussion with them and found out that she had just completed all of the 4,000 foot mountain ranges in New Hampshire --- all 48 of them to be exact. Whoa. I’ll write more about this in a future article. Our trek down was obviously steep, so we took it slow. They say the majority of accidents that happen on the trail are when you are on the last few miles back to the car. As there was no need to get back at a certain time, there was no need to rush. The sun eventually began to set and cast an incredible palate of colours onto the evening sky. A smile stretched from ear to ear as I bounced my way down the trail like a billy goat towards the car. I was thankful I got spend the day scrambling around on rock and breathing in mountain air, all in the company of one of my most cherished friends. It is moments like that I truly live for. For those seeking such an experience, I fully recommend this trek. Even the drive down winding dirt roads to the trailhead itself is worth the journey. Just make sure to check the weather, pack smart (especially with December and Winter now here) and remember that it may look like a short hike on your map, but it is an absolute challenge for your body. As the great Edmund Hillary once day: “It is not the mountain we conquer, but ourselves.”
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Eric’s Optimal Corner Joel Witmer / Optimal Self Community Health and Wellness Center
How “The Technician” Built His Legs: Choose Something and Stick with It My name is Joel Witmer, and I am a trainer at Optimal Self. This Thanksgiving I met a fitness icon who taught me a useful (and unexpected) lesson. “The Technician” is a world-renowned expert on nutrition, specifically bodybuilding contest prep, an accomplished author, commentator and former competitor. Turns out he is also a lifelong friend of a more recent friend of mine. My wife, along with my good buddy (and fellow Optimal Self member) Kenneth, and I set out for Thanksgiving dinner at this friend’s house, oblivious to the fact that we would soon encounter this bodybuilding guru. Upon confirming the presence of “The Technician” (“Is that Chris Aceto?”), I couldn’t stop ruminating on muscular hypertrophy. Brimming with questions, I decided nonetheless not to pester the guru during our friend’s bountiful feast. I was too nervous, and after all, few people want to discuss work on Thanksgiving.
The front squat can be the least comfortable and most humbling of exercises, requiring the lifter to begin with a light weight and experiment cautiously with form. Each rep requires the utmost attention to detail, balance, symmetry, depth and posture, as well as continual correction. For me, the arm position required to secure the barbell is so awkward, I use lifting straps to create a more stable platform for the bar. The front squat is the opposite of the prototypical ego lift (back squat) and the most functionally useful of exercises, utilised not only by bodybuilders but strength athletes like Sergey Litvinov, Olympic gold medalist in the hammer throw (https://www.t-nation.com/training/litvinov-workout). The anterior load results in a more upright stance and less stress on the lower back than imposed by the torso position of the back squat. The movement focuses more intensely on the quadriceps with less glute and hamstring involvement. This valuable exercise can be cycled with the back squat or added to your program if accumulating more quad strength, size, power, and/or overall toughness are priorities. After you do a few sets of heavy front squats, other weighted movements will seem effortless by comparison and no other new, untested exercise, quite so daunting. If you formulate an intelligent plan for quad growth or any other fitness goal, and follow through with consistent, focused work, you will succeed. In other words, make a commitment and stick with it. Even if you fail to meet your goal by following the plan of your choosing, you are bound to come closer to reaching it and achieving the desired result. In the process, you will grow stronger inside and out. As the New Year approaches, I challenge you to set a goal or just practice a new movement or skill on a regular basis. In 2018, barring accident or injury, I will improve my front squat and squat more in general.
Like a flustered millennial, weaned on a steady diet of top 40 hits then thrust suddenly into the presence of Bieber himself, I struggled to get a grip. “Fawning,” my wife called this nauseating display. I hoped my perceptive wife was the only one who noticed my rapt over-attentiveness, but of course it was obvious to everyone in the room. I love to learn about things that interest me, especially garnering fresh ideas to improve performance. What I really wanted from Aceto was The Secret Formula, a cutting edge supplement I had never considered, esoteric knowledge to provide an edge that would help me transform my body with greater ease. What I got instead was a reality check: Our mutual friend was recounting witnessing Aceto’s front squatting 405 pounds to the floor for multiple sets of 12. He then made a sweeping gesture with his gnarled mitts, indicating the girth and separation of an awe-inspiring set of quads transcendent of verbal explanation. I front-squatted a few sets a couple weeks ago and haven’t wanted to since. This is somewhat rational considering the front squat involves securing a barbell somewhere between the clavicle and the throat which can restrict breathing comfort in a grueling exercise that requires deep, full breaths.
The point of my tale is self-evident yet elusive. I believe it bears repeating: whatever diet or exercise programme you decide to undertake in 2018, hard work and commitment over time are what yield results. This will involve embracing some discomfort. Maybe it’s time for you to try something beyond your current capabilities. Maybe it’s time to graduate from the lat pull-down to the pull-up bar. Your goal or movement of choice doesn’t have to be as brutal or demanding-it could be as simple as incorporating regular physical activity and consuming fewer processed foods-but maybe it’s time to front squat. Choose something simple and challenging, and stick with it! As my timid interaction with “The Technician” reminded me, hard work and consistency is rewarded over sporadic adherence to exotic training tips or complicated routines that ultimately prove unsustainable. Target your weaknesses, up your intensity, come to the gym with a purpose, and if you’re ready to bring the necessary focus and intentionality, don’t be afraid to try something new or more demanding. At Optimal Self, expect to find a supportive and positive climate where you can take that next step, expect to find a personal trainer who can help you reach your goal, whether that’s learning a new movement, growing bigger biceps, losing weight, or preparing for a race or competition. Stop in soon, and pay us a visit; we would love to meet you!
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Beyond The Forecast
By Jack Sillin / Weatherman & Meterology Student Hello everyone!
While this time of year traditionally is one of increasingly active weather, this Fall has been unusually quiet. Since the major Halloween windstorm, we’ve had no weather events more significant than light showers. While temperatures have slowly gotten cooler, as they always do, we’ve been missing the large storms that usually mark Winter’s triumphant return. So what’s behind the lack of activity? The jet stream is one of the primary drivers of our weather here in Maine, and for the past month or so, it has been locked into a pattern known as “zonal flow.” Zonal flow happens when the jet is pointed almost uniformly west to east, with very little in the way of north/south movement.
So when will our zonal flow pattern come to an end? If you’re reading this after about the 10th of December, it is likely already a distant memory. As of presstime, the 2nd, the chain reaction that will shift our pattern was already well underway across the North Pacific, where unusually tranquil weather in the Bering Sea was replaced in the last week of November by a series of hurricane force storms. The transition to storminess in the Bering Sea is already helping to result in a transition to quiet weather across the West Coast as a ridge builds across the area. Weather patterns across the globe are arranged as alternating areas of stormy weather (troughs) and quiet weather (ridges). Depending on how many quiet/stormy “waves” there are in the atmosphere, the wavelength of these areas can vary, but generally speaking, stormy weather in the Bering Sea results in quiet weather along the West coast, which in turn helps to fuel stormy weather develop along the East Coast. This pattern change to meridional flow is almost certain to bring colder and more active weather, but will it bring snowier weather? That’s a much harder question to answer. To get snow, you need not just cold air, but also moisture and lift. The large scale patterns across the hemisphere can tell us a lot about temperature trends, but we need to wait to see how individual systems develop to find out if we can get the moisture and the lift to move into our area. I will say, the large scale pattern is generally favourable for storms developing off the East Coast, but it’s too early to tell whether those storms will bring heavy snow to Portland. It’s entirely possible a small disturbance located in the wrong spot results in heavy snow for Halifax, while we see cold and breezy weather here in Maine. Those small disturbances are hard to pick up at the subseasonal (two to four weeks) timescale, so we’ll just have to see.
This pattern creates quiet weather because it stratifies the atmosphere by latitude. Cold air makes laps around the globe from west to east in the high latitudes, temperate air makes laps from west to east in the mid latitudes, and warm air does the same at low latitudes. Zonal flow prohibits the mixing of warm and cold air, which is a critical ingredient for storm formation. The other reason zonal flow inhibits storm formation is that it robs systems of their moisture. Think of what’s to our west, where the air in a zonal pattern is coming from. To our west lies the North American continent, a source of dry continental air masses. The only available source of moisture is the Great Lakes --- enough to generate some showers, but not nearly enough to fuel a significant event. In a non-zonal flow regime, moisture-rich air from the Gulf of Mexico and the Subtropical Atlantic Ocean can flow northward, into cold air moving south from Canada. These are the set-ups that can produce heavy precipitation events, in the form of rain, snow and ice. Non-zonal flow set-ups are often referred to as Meridional flow patterns, as they feature winds that blow parallel to longitude lines, referred to as meridians.
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However, while we can’t predict exactly how storms will behave, we can identify potential periods of stormier than normal weather. Small waves known as “signals” travel around the earth with the jet stream, and bring active weather with them wherever they go. By tracking these signals, which travel with an unusually high amount of regularity, we can pick out particular ~3 day timeframes with heightened potential for stormy weather. As I’m writing this at the end of November, it looks like we have two main windows for potentially large storms, one from December 15th to the 17th, and another from the 22nd to the 25th. Furthermore, the leading edge of a pattern change is notoriously a good place for storms to develop, so if we see some activity between the 9th and the 11th, that wouldn’t be surprising. Again, these signals merely suggest periods where the probability of active weather is unusually high, if one small disturbance is misaligned, we could see little or nothing in the way of sensible weather. As for the end of December into January, there remains considerable uncertainty as to whether we revert back to our zonal pattern or if we keep our meridionally active pattern going. Time will tell! I’ll be back next month with more weather! -Jack
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Jack’s Weather Terms Ridge: A ridge is an area of high geopotential heights that generally results in warm and dry surface weather. The geopotential height of a given pressure level (for example, 500mb) is how far above sea level you’d have to go to achieve that pressure. So how can we use geopotential heights to forecast temperature trends? The volume of a gas and its temperature are inversely correlated. The colder a gas, the denser it is and the less volume it takes up (this is due to the ideal gas law PV= nRT where V (volume) and T (temperature) are on opposite sides of the equation, thus demanding they be inversely correlated assuming all other variables are constant). The opposite is true for warm air. As you can see in the graphic above, a warm, low-density airmass will expand, pushing the height of a given pressure level higher. The opposite is true for a dense, cold airmass that will show up as an area of lower heights. Trough: A trough is the opposite of a ridge, and has low geopotential heights, signaling a cold, high density airmass. In addition to cold air, the front side of troughs often feature active weather. As the cold, dense air associated with the trough moves east with the jet stream, it displaces warm air associated with the downstream ridge. This displacement favours rising air, which is the root cause of clouds and precipitation. The higher the amplitude of the trough, the greater the magnitude of this displacement, thus resulting in stronger lifting and stormier weather. Meridional flow regimes are associated with high amplitude troughs, which is another reason they often feature active weather compared to the shallow troughs of zonal flow regimes.
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Processed Media By Randy Dankievitch — TV Editor of Goomba Stomp
The Best Games of 2017 2017 has been a remarkable year in gaming: 12 months months overflowing with fantastic games, exciting new technology – and of course, Nintendo's return to prominence as both a manufacturer of game consoles, and as a video game software developer. To call it a historical year in the vein of 1998 is almost an understatement, given just how many quality games that came out in 2017 – lead by these seven titles: the most remarkable, memorable game experiences consoles had to offer this year. Cuphead --- Though Microsoft has all but given up on procuring third-party (aka, non-Microsoft owned) exclusives for the Xbox One, the independent Studio MDHR took the world by storm this fall with Cuphead: Don't Deal with the Devil!, a side-scrolling shooter/platformer with the most unique visual aesthetic I've seen in years. A pitch-perfect emulation of Fleischer and early Disney animation design, the surrealist, exaggerated cartoon art style is one of the more intoxicating visual designs in recent memory, an impressive feat matched by the game's rigidly difficult gameplay, a game that challenges both a player's conceptions of what a game looks like, and a player's conception of what “mastery” really means. To defeat Cuphead, one must become Cuphead, a platitude that will ring deafeningly true for anybody who has suffered through the gauntlet that is Cuphead's many challenging boss fights. Horizon: Zero Dawn --- Sony's Playstation 4 has been a hotbed of platformexclusive titles in the last few years; but none more impressive than Horizon: Zero Dawn, the game that single-handedly brought console gaming into the 4K era, with one of the most beautifully crafted landscapes in video game history. Featuring one of video game's most layered female characters (and voice performances), Horizon: Zero Dawn tells the story of Aloy, a woman trying to find answers about the fall of humanity and the rise of organic machines, in a world that's regressed to tribalism. A massively ambitious sci-fi story, set in one of the largest, most geographically diverse open worlds ever constructed; from the moment Guerrilla Games' masterpiece opens until the final credits roll, Horizon: Zero Dawn impresses with its scope, creativity, and awesome technical achievement. The Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild --- What can be said about Nintendo's landmark adventure title that hasn't already been said this year? Breath of the Wild was the exact game Nintendo needed to launch the Nintendo Switch ... a major entry in an iconic franchise, one that truly represented a step forward for a company, viewed by many to be stuck in an increasingly disappointing cycle of underwhelming hardware and unexciting games. A game that both embraces the conventions of modern, open-world game design while rejecting the underlying philosophies and systems of said open-world adventures. Breath of the Wild is a truly a game about exploration, set in a world existing as a shell of its former self, restoring the sense of mystery and discovery missing in so many games of its kind in recent years. Pyre --- If there was an award for “Most Forgotten Title of 2017”, Pyre would be quite the contender; released this Summer to critical fanfare, the latest game from Supergiant Games (Bastion, Transistor) was an intoxicating mix of NBA
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Jam and traditional party-based role-playing game, the first true “sports RPG” of its kind ever to release on consoles. Mechanically deep and visually evocative, Pyre's blend of dense, yet accessible gameplay, and a deeper, philosophic story of redemption and self-discovery was a natural, impressive next step for the prestigious independent developer; however, less than six months later, the game has completely disappeared from general discourse. Regardless of whether you've played it yet or not, this is definitively a game that you should play – not only does it have a fun campaign, but it has one of the more addictive local multiplayer experiences of the year. Sonic Mania --- There were two Sonic games released in 2017 (which must be the first time that's happened on consoles in at least a decade); and much to everyone's surprise, one of them is good! Sonic Forces, the game developed by the official Sonic Team at Sega, is hot garbage... a reminder of how bad Sonic games have been since they went to 3D back in 2000 (sorry, Dreamcast fans – Sonic Adventure is a bad video game). Sonic Mania, developed by Sega-employed emulator Christian Whitehead and other prominent members of Sonic culture, is everything Sonic Forces isn't – which means it's everything gamers really want from a Sonic game. The sense of speed, the genius level design, 16-bit graphics dripping with style, a kick-ass soundtrack... it's amazing how effortless all of this feels in Sonic Mania, the rare “reboot” that doesn't suffocate its sense of identity with big ideas or innovative mechanics. It's a Sonic-ass Sonic game, and a masterfully crafted one at that; in 2017, what more could we ask for from the once-edgy blue hedgehog? Super Mario Odyssey --- My personal selection for Game of the Year, Super Mario Odyssey is an absolute revelation of game design, player mechanics, and pure, unadulterated joy --- the latter of which big AAA games have struggled with in recent memory. Centered around the ingenious idea of turning Mario's hat into a sentient being capable of hijacking the minds and bodies (don't think about it too much) of creatures in Mario's many kingdoms, Super Mario Odyssey invites players to explore its many impressively dense worlds with a sense of curiosity – which in turn leads to one of the most rewarding, joyful game experiences I've ever had, as Mario makes his way from forest, to desert, to city, and beyond Earth in his latest adventure to save Peach from Bowser. Super Mario Odyssey is a stunning achievement for Nintendo, a innovative game that properly celebrates three decades of running, jumping, and crushing goombas with the world's most popular Italian (former) plumber. Tekken 7 --- It's been a great year for fighting games. Street Fighter V finally found its footing after an embarrassingly bad launch in 2016; Injustice 2 offered another strong title from the minds at NetherRealm Studios; Nintendo launched an interesting new fighter with ARMS; Marvel vs. Capcom returned after a long hiatus with Infinite; and of course, Bandai Namco's Tekken 7, which made its way to the U.S. this year after two separate Japanese releases in the past 18 months. Based on the Faded Retribution expansion seen in Japan's arcades, Tekken 7 is a beautiful reminder of the classic pugilistic gameplay that grounds Tekken in ways other fighters (especially 3D fighters of its ilk, like Soul Calibur or the forgotten Virtua Fighter series) haven't approached in years. Plus, it has Akuma, which is just f*cking awesome.
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Financial Focus By Bryce Kronk & Jeremy Urquhart — Edward Jones As the year draws to a close, it’s a good time to review your progress toward your financial goals. But on what areas should you focus your attention? Of course, you may immediately think about whether your investments have done well. When evaluating the performance of their investments for a given year, many people mistakenly think their portfolios should have done just as well as a common market index, such as the Standard & Poor’s 500. But the S&P 500 is essentially a measure of large-company, domestic stocks, and your portfolio probably doesn’t look like that – nor should it, because it’s important to own an investment mix that aligns with your goals, risk tolerance and return objectives. It’s this return objective that you should evaluate over time – not the return of an arbitrary benchmark that isn’t personalised to your goals and risk tolerance.
Your return objective will likely evolve. If you are starting out in your career, you may need your portfolio to be oriented primarily toward growth, which means it may need to be more heavily weighted toward stocks. But if you are retiring in a few years, you may need a more balanced allocation between stocks and bonds, which can address your needs for growth and income. So, assuming you have created a long-term investment strategy that has a target rate of return for each year, you can review your progress accordingly. If you matched or exceeded that rate this past year, you’re staying on track, but if your return fell short of your desired target, you may need to make some changes. Before doing so, though, you need to understand just why your return was lower than anticipated. For example, if you owned some stocks that underperformed due to unusual circumstances – and even events such as Hurricanes Harvey and Irma can affect the stock prices of some companies – you may not need to be overly concerned, especially if the fundamentals of the stocks are still sound. On the other hand, if you own some investments that have underperformed for several years, you may need to consider selling them and using the proceeds to explore new investment opportunities. Investment performance isn’t the only thing you should consider when looking at your financial picture over this past year. What changed in your life? Did you welcome a new child to your family? If so, you may need to respond by increasing your life insurance coverage or opening a college savings account. Did you or your spouse change jobs? You may now have access to a new employer-sponsored retirement account, such as a 401(k), so you’ll need to decide how much money to put into the various investments within this plan. And one change certainly happened this past year: You moved one year closer to retirement. By itself, this may cause you to re-evaluate how much risk you’re willing to tolerate in your investment portfolio, especially if you are within a few years of your planned retirement. Whether it is the performance of your portfolio or changes in your life, you will find that you always have some reasons to look back at your investment and financial strategies for one year – and to look ahead at moves you can make for the next. Have a Happy New Year!
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The Standard Reviewer
By Andrea Rouda / Up Portland’s Film & Theatre Reviewer
My Thanksgiving Menu: An Overstuffed Turkey and Some Tasty Indian Pudding Over the recent four-day Thanksgiving holiday weekend I gorged on more than food. Besides thousands of extra calories, I ingested two movies: A wide-release Hollywood entrée showing several times a day at every theater in the area – actually, the entire state -- and an independent side dish that played just one time at a local art house. The differences between the two films were startling and worth noting. Even though they have increased in popularity, “indies” are still the Rodney Dangerfield of the film world. Like that now-deceased comedian, they “don’t
w o N ! n e p O
get no respect.” At least not as much as they deserve. Sure, the Sundance Film Festival crowd loves them, and they get standing ovations in Cannes, but despite all the accolades from critics and film buffs they are rarely fed to a mainstream audience. You can find them online or watch them at home on Netflix, but if you’re seeking the large-screen experience, here in Maine it’s tough to come by. The only local venues that regularly show indies and documentaries are the Frontier Cinema in Brunswick and the SPACE Gallery in Portland. This is a shame since most of the time it’s the small movies that offer so much. Big studio blockbusters stuffed with stars and special effects often still leave you hungry, the same way luscious, sugary desserts yield little nourishment in the long run. As expected, I all but forgot the Hollywood offering immediately, whereas the no-name indie is still feeding me images days later. Following are my thoughts regarding each of them. Murder on the Orient Express Distributed by the mega-studio 20th Century-Fox, with a production cost of $55,000,000, advertising for this sizable chunk of Hollywood fluff started even before last Summer. As a fan of Agatha Christie’s murder mysteries since high school, I was excited to see the third remake of this great tale. But as is often the case, the trailer proved to be more exciting than the actual movie.
Had I overdone it at Thanksgiving dinner earlier in the day I could blame my intermittent snoozing during Murder on the Orient Express on the scientific is excited to announce evidence that “feast-induced drowsiness may be the result of a heavy meal hours Thursday – Sunday. rich in carbohydrates.”
Portland Pottery Café
the addition of evening Chef Brian Grossman has joined our team to offer a new evening endeavor known as Lena’s. This new venue will offer homemade, traditional Italian Comfort food with specialties to include lasagna, veal and eggplant parmigiana, risotto, hand made pasta, meatballs, cannoli and more! Wine and beer are now available and the food is fantastic. Hours Thursday through Saturday 5-9 pm Sunday 4-8 pm.
Portland Pottery Café continues with
its usual hours Monday – Sunday. Chef Chris Thurston has just introduced the Fall/Winter menu and there are new salads, sandwiches and small plates to be discovered. Some specials include roasted short ribs with mashed potato, butternut squash and sage risotto, beet salad and of course our continually changing variety of soups, frittatas, and desserts. All of our baked goods are made here in the café.
We hope to see you soon! Page 24
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But since I hadn’t, I must attribute it to a boring script and lackluster performances, especially by the lead actor, and film’s director, Kenneth Branagh. His unappealing face covered with a distractingly bizarre mustache fills the screen for much of two hours, accompanied by a farcical French accent that was all but unintelligible. Based on Agatha Christie’s 1934 book from which the film was adapted, Branagh plays Hercule Poirot, the self-described “most famous detective in the world.” Poirot is most memorable for the tics and quirks stemming from his OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder), but you’d never know it here. Just about the only OCD-ish thing he does in this version of the film is to straighten a few men’s ties and demand that his breakfast eggs be boiled for exactly four minutes. Now that’s a disease I could live with. (In fact, I may already have it.) A sudden change of plans unexpectedly puts Poirot aboard the luxury train, The Orient Express. One by one we meet the other passengers as they board, then retire for the night. By morning, a violent murder has occurred. Naturally, Poirot is put in
charge of investigating which of the captive passengers was responsible for stabbing the deceased 12 times. His questioning of each passenger individually tells a complicated story in flashbacks. Having enjoyed the 1974 version starring Albert Finney, who was nominated for an Oscar for Best Actor for his over-the-top portrayal of Poirot, I was eager to see the film. The current impressive cast includes Michelle Pfeiffer, Johnny Depp, Dame Judi Dench, Penelope Cruz and Willem Dafoe, plus newer stars like Josh Gad and Daisy Ridley who are recognisable to a younger audience. Despite all that talent it was disappointing, lacking the palpable suspense that is surely the first thing you want in a murder mystery. In this one, by the time you find out whodunit -- whocares? The acting was a yawn, even from the likes of the much-lauded Dame Dench who added virtually nothing other then her haughty look and considerable wrinkles to the proceedings. Johnny Depp was also disappointing, possibly because he was dressed in normal street clothes with nary an eye patch, earring or gold tooth adding sparkle. Only Michelle Pfeiffer rose to the occasion as a straight-talking, aging beauty, which I guess is what she really is, so how hard was it for her? On the plus side (sort of), there are many, many, almost too many, stunning aerial shots of the train snaking through snowy mountains somewhere in Europe. I say “sort of” because much of those travelogue shots resembled a child’s Christmas train set running around a tabletop in front of stock footage from a bin marked “Sound of Music-ish Scenery.” Pretty, nonetheless. Another perk was seeing the inside of a luxury train, and this one was quite grand. Aside from an avalanche that literally stopped the train in its tracks, it looked like a safe way to simultaneously see the world and eat gourmet food, all without the hassles of hotel bookings.
What little plot exists is secondary to the glaring depiction of the dire plight of the Native Americans, both historically and in modern times. Once he arrives, Nurburn finds little to do there and wants to flee. Sensing this, Dan and his nephew Grover (Richard Ray Whitman, a Yuchi-Muscogee/Creek actor and activist) virtually hold Nurburn hostage in order that he fully experience daily life on the reservation. Filmed entirely on the Pine Ridge Indian Reservation, all the Native Americans we meet in the film are people we’d like to meet in real life but never do, primarily because they spend their entire lives on reservations. In fact, the ones brave enough to leave face an even harsher fate. Lacking the support and comfort of their tribe, they rarely, if ever, are accepted into a white world. They are the ones referred to in the film’s title. One trait Nurburn learns soon enough is the high priority his Native American hosts place on silence and listening. The audience gets the chance to experience it firsthand in the pacing of the film; nothing much happens onscreen in terms of action, but a lot happens in terms of the spirit. Elder Dan understands the language of birds that tell him when it’s going to rain. And instead of frittering away his time doing things that have nothing to do with living, he perpetually learns from nature and the surrounding wildlife. Even the prairie dogs have something to teach him.
I wish I could tell you more about the movie but, as I already admitted, I was napping on and off, mostly during Branagh’s long, unintelligible monologues, which sort of does tell you something. Neither Wolf Nor Dog As I said in my intro, independents are the Rodney Dangerfield of the film world. Far too often, they “don’t get no respect.” At least not as much respect as they deserve, since so many of them offer so much more than the big studio blockbusters. Stuffed with stars and special effects, they still leave you hungry, the way feasting on sugary desserts yields little nourishment in the long run. In 2014, director Steven Lewis began raising money on Kickstarter for his movie Neither Wolf Nor Dog, with a minimum target goal of just $30,000. (They made that and more, but no telling how much it cost in the end.) Released in 2016, it tells an unusual and, to me, important story, which is immediately refreshing since so many films today present hackneyed plots and rewrites of past box office hits. A quiet and understated adaptation of the book of the same name by author Kent Nurburn, it tells his personal story of being summoned by an elder of South Dakota’s Lakota Tribe for unknown reasons. Nurburn had earlier published an anthology of stories collected from Native American children, which was his connection to the tribe. Intrigued, and with time on his hands while his wife and child are away, Nurburn (played by actor Christopher Sweeney) decides to drive 400 miles from his home in Minnesota to find out. Against a background of the stunning and very authentic mountains of America’s west, we meet the very authentic elder Dan (Dave Bald Eagle, First Chief of the United Indigenous Nations), who at 97 recognises that any day might be his last. Because of that, he seeks documentation of his true stories about the lives of his friends and family --- Native Americans with ancestral grievances against the white man. Clearly this is not a happy movie, and at times it strays into deep sadness, especially if you are prone to empathy. (I am, and I cried.)
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Ground-Breaking Held For 20 Thames Ground-breaking ceremonies were held a few days ago for Twenty Thames, located across from the Ocean Gate Terminal on the Eastern Waterfront. The new building, now under construction, will offer 28 luxury two and three-bedroom condominiums. Developers noted, “Presenting sophisticated contemporary design and features, including valet parking for up to two cars per unit, Twenty Thames is the only fully steel and concrete constructed residential building in this part of Portland.” Twenty Thames is being developed by EssexNorth Portland, with building design by Archetype Architects, interior design by Urban Dwellings, and construction management by Wright-Ryan Construction. The units are being marketed by Elise Kiely and Sandra Wendland of Legacy Properties Sotheby’s International Realty. “Twenty Thames will be the crown jewel in the robust Eastern Waterfront neighbourhood, offering a sophisticated and contemporary interior design, uniquely positioned to capture stunning views overlooking Casco Bay while a short stroll to all that Portland has to offer from fine food and boutiques to a waterfront promenade and trail system right out the front door,” developer, Ara Aftandilian of EssexNorth said. Units range in size from 1,210 to over 2,000 square feet, with prices from the mid $500,000 range to over $2 million. Several of the units will have walk-out balconies, including two water-facing 6th floor penthouses, which will have 700+ square foot balconies. “Twenty Thames is drawing local buyers who want to have the active walkable lifestyle for work and entertainment that this part of Portland offers, as well as out-of-state buyers who are looking to Portland as an attractive, more manageable alternative to the Boston or New York condo market,” Kiely and Wendland, who are representing the property, noted. For additional information visit twentythames.com or drop by the advance sales office at 208 Fore Street. Office hours are Tuesdays and Thursdays from 11 a.m. until 1 p.m. and Saturdays from 10 till noon. Kiely can be reached at elise@ elisekiely.com or give a bell to 207/838.1050. Wendland can be reached at swendland@legacysir.com or by phone at 207/233.7788.
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I took Old Port Festival “Eve” off in order to gather the rather copious amounts of food, drink and serving supplies potentially needed to feed the harried hungry hordes awaiting my tasty offerings. These tasks accomplished, along with when to meet up with dad the next day, I spent a few hours that evening at a nearby house party, calming my pre-Old Port Festival jitters with a few adult beverages.
Mark: My Words
As Dad and I drove the stand and supplies to my designated spot next morning, we were chagrined to see the early dawn filled with wet, misty fog. Helpful event volunteers were on hand to make sure that all vendors were in their proper spaces, with ample time to prepare before things got hot and heavy.
By Mark Gatti / Mark’s Hotdogs A rite of passage for many of us in the food and beverage industry in Southern Maine is ponying up and working in at least One Old Port Festival, if not numerous ones. Starting my business after the 1983 festival had already occurred, my first festival to work in was in 1984. Due to the large expense in putting on this event, the fee for food and beverage stands to ply their trade this day is somewhat steep, but is a great opportunity for exposure, particularly for new businesses. It was a no-brainer for me to go all in. Having talked prior to the big day to numerous people with past Old Port Festival experience, I had a hunch it would be a madly busy day. Cognizant of this possibility, I happily accepted my dad’s offer to help out that day, despite his recently having had back surgery. It turned out to be a day never-to-be-forgotten and one which still brings bouts of laughter when we recall it.
Speaking of hot, to our great relief the damp early morning transformed into a very warm and somewhat humid day. We spent the last few minutes before things started eagerly waiting in the hope of being invaded by scores of famished folks ready to spend their funds on our street food delights. Like a levee broken, floods of people rushed in around 11 a.m. and soon everybody everywhere was packed in like sardines. An experienced veteran with all of one year in the food serving business, it was planned out that I would prepare and serve all food and drink orders and dad would be solely responsible for taking in all the dough and making change when necessary. Busy as we were, everything was going along smoothly for the first hour or so until a mother with four kids in tow placed a big order that she quickly changed several times. Being highly adrenalized and alert, not to mention quite a bit younger than I am
Maine Jewish Museum
Artist Talk: December 10, 2017, 2pm-4pm
Jeffrey Ackerman interviews Kathy Weinberg...Kathy Weinberg interviews Jeffrey Ackerman... an interesting concept presented by this husband and wife team exhibiting at the Maine Jewish Museum
2017 Menorah Exhibition
Artifact and Artifice
Hours and Days
3rd Floor Sanctuary
Spiegel Gallery
Fineberg Community Room
20 Maine Artists
Jeffrey Ackerman
Kathy Weinberg
Exhibitions run: November 9, 2017 - January 7, 2018 Maine Jewish Museum
267 Congress Street, Portland, ME 04101 (207) 773-2339 Monday - Friday 10am-4pm + Sundays 1pm - 5pm or by appointment mainejewishmuseum.org Nancy Davidson, Curator
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Up Portland 12.17 In Print * On The Web At: www.upportland.com * On Facebook
now, I was able to keep up with her changes and successfully completed the order with no mistakes. A social and outgoing man (my dad is rarely at a loss for words) his now sudden silence was out of character. I looked over to see a totally blank expression on his face. Knowing this may happen (it is hard to make quick calculations in your head for hours at a time unless part of a daily routine) I hastily told the mother how much her order was and then told Dad what change to give her back. This was my working model for the next three hours or so. Dad would tell me the order, I would prepare and serve all food and drink, tell the customer how much the order was and then tell dad how much change to give back, after he told me what denomination bill each customer gave him. Believe it or not, having Dad just be a money handler helped way more than you’d think. This one task removed from my duties still saved decent time and kept the long line of customers moving at a decent clip. The combination of a now hot and humid afternoon, and a dad still not fully recovered from back surgery, he recounted later that he felt like a “zombie” and was hoping to just survive the day. We were operating fairly well with maybe one more busy hour to go when we heard a little boy tell his father, “Daddy, my soda is hot.” I checked the cold plate part of my soda dispensing unit and sure enough there was no more ice on the plate. Without any ice on this plate, the soda flowing out of the lines would start to foam and indeed be warm. I told my dad not to worry, the day was almost done and it would be next to impossible to find any bags of ice for sale anywhere on the Portland peninsula.. Off he went anyway, on foot, searching for ice much like a lost nomad walking through a wasteland desert in hopes of miraculously stumbling upon an oasis. I continued on my own, serving the last couple dozen customers, charging only for food (“hot soda” would be on the house for those desperately thirsty customers requesting same). At five o’clock the day was pretty much over, most food customers satiated. However, there was a ton of young, rowdy folk still lingering about all of whom evidently had consumed a large amount of “adult beverages”. Still no sign of dad, I started the long process of breaking down and packing up. Suddenly the air exploded with the loud sounds of beer bottles smashing against the old Armory building (my designated spot happened to be right next to the Armory) and sure enough, a dozen highly intoxicated festival goers were hurling their empties against the old brick building. Yes, reader, this little hot dog vendor was getting stressed out, fearful of a bad ending to this busy, strange and eventful day! Fortunately for me and other innocent bystanders, the drunken louts were too loud and obnoxious for their own good, bringing Portland’s finest to the scene within a few short minutes. The police quickly arrested the perpetrators, adeptly applying “Cumberland County Bracelets” and taking them away. Order restored, I finished packing and hitching everything up when Dad appeared out of the hazy, humid early Summer air. He was soaked in sweat and barely able to walk. He had gone to every possible mom and pop store on the Peninsula, eventually making it as far as Park Avenue. I was relieved that he made it back, though he looked like the lone survivor of a nuclear bomb attack. And yes, in each hand he held a rapidly melting ten pound bag of ice! On occasion, that 1984 Old Port Festival will come up in conversation. Invariably Dad and I will erupt in hysterical laughter and anyone present will think us temporarily insane, unless they were privy to the events of that crazy day. Dad told me after being out in the heat that he slept all night and most of the next day, but he survived the festival, well enough, in fact, that he just celebrated his 60th wedding anniversary with my mom this past July. Look for more “Mark my words” next month. Happy holidays to all!
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Up Portland 12.17 In Print * On The Web At: www.upportland.com * On Facebook
Up Portland 12.17 In Print * On The Web At: www.upportland.com * On Facebook Page 31
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Up Portland 12.17 In Print * On The Web At: www.upportland.com * On Facebook