Up portland april 2016

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April 2016 Up Portland 04.16 On The Web At: www.upportland.com Page 1

Caucus Confusion A Real Vote Killer; We’d Like To Nominate A Change!

by Peter Michalakes for Up Portland Call this a look back at Portland’s Democratic Caucus or let me allow some of those in lines that stretched over a half-mile to use their words: “People were waiting in line for hours...There were only six people checking in thousands of people...so many people were disenfranchised.”

Such was the harsh reflection of a volunteer at the Portland Democratic caucus 6th March. Jordan McCloud of Portland had been at the caucus hours before its scheduled 2 p.m. start, and like many voters, he was unable to leave until well into the evening.

Massive crowds and a vast break-down in communication between city officials, Democratic leadership and voters resulted in chaotic disorganisation at Deering High School.

the general election, rather than participate in the community-meeting styled caucus which is sometimes criticized as unnecessary and inefficient.

“This was the first time for me, this was the first time for a lot of people,” McCloud said. “I don’t think we’ll have another caucus in Maine — at least, I hope we don’t,” in reference to the proposed switch from caucus to primary format for the next presidential cycle that a vast majority of states already practice.

A major issue on caucus day arose regarding the registration of new voters on site. Prior to the caucus, the Maine Democratic Party stated that all new voters in line by 1 p.m. would be able to register and fully participate in the ensuing caucus.

“This process has been disgraceful,” McCloud said as he waited in the high school gymnasium. “So many of the rules that the Democratic Party had said would be in place were broken.”

This ambitious goal was met with unsuccessful results. Party officials were unprepared for the sheer volume of voters seeking registration, and even those who had arrived well before the deadline were turned away by those at the City Clerk’s desk. Under a state mandate, the City Clerk and its employees are only obligated to process voter registration at the caucus for one hour.

As a line over a half-mile long continued to grow, Maine Democratic leadership made the decision to change the caucus to a primary format for those uninterested in becoming state delegates. The goal of this move was to expedite the voting process by allowing the casting of ballots typically seen in

One man, a veteran who requested anonymity because of present military service, had waited hours in the registration line only to be turned away by city workers who had long worked past their state-mandated work hours for the caucus.

Gatherings, recent Paintings of Portland and Beyond by Henry Isaacs Artist Talk: Sunday, April 3, 2016, 2pm First Friday Art Walk, April 1, 2016 5pm - 7pm Exhibit runs March 10 - May 8, 2016 Curated by Nancy Davidson

“There were personnel here who were working for the city and they didn’t want to stay,” he said. “Just as an American, this is upsetting.”

Katherine L. Jones, Portland City Clerk, was unavailable for comment.

She and her staff left the scene amid increasing hostilities on the part of those still waiting in line, and after seven hours of registering voters.

Veronica Foster, also of Portland, was inside the City Clerk’s allocated room at Deering High School in order to resolve a registration issue of her own.

Join us for a lively discussion with Henry Isaacs about the recent completion of his new studio in Portland and his latest exhibit comprised of recent works ranging from wanderings near his new home to visits with friends and places around the world. Henry is a charismatic and personable artist with an equally impressive and varied teaching career. Stints include: teaching anatomical drawing at Dartmouth, drawing and painting at the Massachusetts College of Art, and drawing at several European colleges.

“He paints with energy, passion, and self-assurance. His style—broken brushwork and a palette of delicate blues, greens, pinks, and yellows—marks him as one of the most recognizable artists painting in Maine today. In person, he is as engaging an individual as you will ever meet. He is both worldly and down to earth, both witty and self-effacing, generous with his time, and passionate about the dangers of the art world’s becoming overly commercialized.” Gleason Fine Art Gallery

Maine Jewish Museum

“It’s definitely a different mood than outside,” Ms. Foster said from within the room. “People are really frustrated that they have waited so long and feel like they aren’t being helped.”

Ms. Foster had experienced the most prominent headache at the caucus: They lost her voter registration.

She had been registered with the

267 Congress Street, Portland, ME 04101 (207) 773-2339 Monday - Friday 10am-2pm + Sundays 1pm - 5pm or by appointment

mainejewishmuseum.org

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Democratic Party well in advance of the 2016 presidential caucus, however, when she arrived at the table for registered voters, volunteers told her that she was not on their list to participate.

This was the experience for several other voters at the Maine caucus: Registered, and by all accounts legally qualified to participate, yet ultimately unable to do so due to mistakes made by the higher-ups of the Maine Democratic Party.

Ultimately, those voters who had their registrations lost were able to file provisional ballots under the assumption that the state would locate their registrations in the next day and process their vote. However, there would be no confirmation that votes had been processed, so these voters were left to trust an organisation that had already failed them multiple times that day. And, for the voters who came to register on time but were met with resistance, they simply went home.

After the debacle of the 2016 Portland Democratic caucus, State Senate minority leader Justin Alfond and other Maine legislators have stated that they will push for a switch to a primary system for upcoming presidential elections.

It is the hope of those thousands who waited in line that such a bill passes with ease.

(EDITOR’S NOTE—This report by Peter Michalakes includes opinions of the writer who not only was on the scene at Deering High School to report on it for Up Portland, but to cast his first-ever vote in an election. Here’s hoping his experience in November goes a bit better than his first caucus did in March.)

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Hackin’ The Net

By Ted Fleischaker / Publisher How much does a motorcycle cost? What about a car? A box of cookies or a pound of hamburger?

Before you ask what any of this has to do with a tech column I shall explain: What we are seeing is the prices for basic and enhanced computer and cellphone services are as all over the map as any of the above items, and even worse. In a world where such pricing is supposed to be regulated by a variety of the Federal Communications Commission (FCC) and state public service commissions, the ability to compare apples to apples has become harder and harder for we consumers.

We were reminded of this in a harsh way recently as we volunteered to work on what folks in our condo development are paying for cable TV, phone and internet services. On the surface, we wanted to offer a company an “exclusive” to our nearly 90-condo building for three, five or seven years in exchange for a rate we could see as less than just the “standard rack rates” and which would have a cap for annual increases, which at times have exceeded 20%. What all this has done for me, thus far, anyway, is to show just how confusing and what a mess companies seem to have made of their pricing — and the virtual impossibility for most consumers to sort out what they should, would and might be able to pay for services they want.

It would seem easy: A certain set of services, a specific time period, a billing amount and done. In reality, thus far we have been unable to get a real dollarsand-sense (or cents) answer from anyone in the biz.

One big problem is a changing business model which some phone firms, and almost all cable companies have been forced into. The reason is simple: Hands up anyone who no longer has a wired phone or buys cable TV for television. A lot more of you raised your hands than would have a year or two ago, because almost everybody we know is watching video “on demand.” That means TV on computers, iPads, phones or anything BUT a television. The days when we all gathered round the TV at 8 Sunday nights to see Ed Sullivan are as dead as, well, Sullivan himself. And the days when we “had to” be home to watch a specific show are likewise history. We had an era when we could “time shift” with first a VCR and then a recorder from the cable company or built in our satellite receiver to a TiVo, but now that technology is as old fashioned as the VCR because we all use Hulu, Netflix, HBO GO and various “on demand” services to watch what we want when we want.

Sadly, most are still there and most have rights issues, copyright and other associated costs. But most of these “narrowcast” channels have few viewers anymore. Chief offender, if one believes the broadcast “trades” is something that used to sign on (back in my “big dish” days of the 70s and 80s) in the late afternoon and off around midnight. It was the Entertainment And Sports Programming Network and back in the day it was filled with such illustrious events as Tallahassee girls swim meets and boys high school games from such hot spots as Sioux City and Yellville, Arkansas.

Problem was that folks wanted more and more and more, so that network, way better known as ESPN as almost nobody even recalls what it stands for anymore, slowly bought up all the big pro games and brought those overpaid players filling the rosters to their schedule. Now one can see the “big boys” and there’s nowhere at all for those Tallahassee girls swimmers.

But that’s a big chunk of the problem. The “big guys” expect big paycheques and that means the cable, satellite firms and the phone companies (remember AT&T owns U-Verse and DirecTV) must pay and pay to subsidise the programming — programming many of us would never willingly buy because we’d never watch it. The only reason it comes to so many households is it’s “bundled” with things we do want to see or subscribing to a bundle is required for the on demand options viewers want.

Add in the new “cable cutters” who don’t even have a TV subscription but just want cable for internet or phone service (as they now compete with the old Ma Bells for we “old fogies” who want wired home phones) and all of a sudden it becomes a royal mess.

How does a cable company pay for 347 channels when all most folks want is a handful or none because they watch their shows on Netflix or Hulu or HBO GO or via another method? And while the sports fans are growing ever more rabid, they are also growing fewer and fewer, especially as the younger crowd tends to not follow as much NFL, NBA and Major League Baseball because they are too busy on their Facebooks, PlayStations and watching movies on their iPads.

Most TV stations stream their local newscasts online, and that’s as true in the U.S. as overseas, though in England, Ireland, Australia (as seen above right from their ABC — Australian Broadcasting Corporation — Player) and other nations online apps and programmes called “iPlayers” allow almost anywhere, anytime streaming of shows old and new. It’s to the point that the venerable old BBC in the UK is going to require a TV licence for online watchers because so few are watching “live” TV anymore in the British Isles.

That leaves a lot of companies with a real dilemma...and I do feel for them. It costs a lot to build and maintain infrastructure: super-fast internet and fiber optic cables, for instance, but if few are buying costly packages with all those cooking and travel and sports channels we never watch, but which return cash to the cable companies, how are they gonna pay the bill for whose of us wanting “just” the internet and no TV?

But what became of those first 20, then 90 then 400 channels that cable companies were making cash delivering to all our TV sets? You know the ones — from news and weather to kids TV, movies, sports, sports and sports to travel, infomercial channels, shopping and more.

That takes us back where we started: the rates are a mess and are getting worse and worse. As fewer and fewer of us watch or pay for traditional TV, but more and more channels appear with higher and higher costs for a cable company or satellite to carry them, who will pay?

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And is cable itself as obsolete as gathering round the TV at 8 to watch Ed Sullivan? According to everything we could find out, not yet, but cable penetration is falling for the first time ever (meaning more of us are “cord cutting”) so it quickly is becoming an endangered species. And the cost of just that ESPN programming to the average cable household (whether or not they watch one pass, free throw, spare or homer) is anywhere from $6 to $8, depending whose numbers you choose to believe.

Household A buys no TV at all but just internet, though they want the fastest net speed they can get. What does the cable company charge them? I know my local cable firm bombs me with e-mail and snail mail offers for “$10 a month” TV packages all the time and they seem aggravated when I call that I not only take no TV services, but do not plan to.

So where does that lead us with the rate discussion? Simply to say the patchwork of prices are confusing at best and in some areas might even go beyond that to the edge of deceptive or questionable They offer “introductory” rates which can skyrocket 20, 30 or even 40% when the “introductory” six month or year terms end. And try asking what a specific set of things will cost when the “deal” ends and it gets even murkier.

I spoke with friends around the country and find that my case is far from unique. Sometimes buying (but not watching) a small group of TV channels will lower the overall cost to the point that it’s cheaper than just subscribing to the internet. Sometimes those specials can be extended if you just call the cable or phone firm and tell them you will cancel due to costs or merely ask: “Is there a better deal?”

Newspapers and other subscription services have done this for years. I called a major New England newspaper recently when my 90-day “intro deal” ended to say I was leaving just due to costs and the lady, without missing a breath said “I’m authorised to give you 25% for an additional three months if you remain as a 7-day subscriber...” which I happily did.

Try negotiating with your own phone or cable company and you may well find that they have some basics, but will offer enough options to save cash that it’s well worth the call. Meanwhile, first list what you need; what you want and what you would like to have and pay for. Despite what the operator may say, you CAN — in most cases — opt for NO TV and you can go for faster internet than what’s offered in many packages.

And remember, just like the price for that car or hamburger can and will be all over the map, so will this, so as my late dad said about most things: shop it. Get the best deal on what you want and remind the phone, cable or Internet Service Provider (ISP) you deal with that in most cases there are options and you can choose to buy elsewhere.

Oh, and if the first person you talk to doesn’t give you any satisfaction, politely ask for a supervisor or boss and see if they will. It may just be that to get the deal you want you will have to go elsewhere or pay a few dollars more, but at the end of the day the big firms all want happy customers — it’s just that some are way easier to deal with than others for we consumers.

Look around and explore your options because more than ever we consumers are spoilt for choice, but we have to do some leg work and occasionally remind the companies that they need us more than we need them. Falling subscriber numbers mean more options for the savvy consumer, but we have to call, ask and while doing so politely, remain steadfast that $X is what our budget allows and no more.

I think you will be surprised how far just asking will get you toward first class internet, phone or TV service with a smaller price tag than if you just say “yes” to the first thing you are offered. Dad was right: Shop it!

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Food For Thought...

Opinions are, as they say, like you-know-what’s in that we all have one, but at the same time they can be as different as night and day. While the views at our house were not quite THAT distinct we did have differing ones after dining at the recently-opened Scales on the waterfront next to the science museum (official address shows as 70 Commercial Street or Maine Wharf, if you prefer).

The eatery, the latest operated by well-known Portland restaurant fixtures Dana Street, Sam Hayward and leading the kitchen, Michael Smith, has a pedigree a mile long. It is also one of those places, too, where you’d love to eat the decor as it’s that cool — from a row of ceiling fans powered by an industrial belt to ice which falls from the ceiling into bins and gets used to keep the freshest oysters in Portland chilled, to a huge antique Toledo Scale (“No springs, honest weight”) which begs guests to step on and get weighed to the awesome waterside views — this place screams atmosphere and more.

The food is also wonderful. Were we not to say that right at the start we might get a skillet to the head from partner Ivan. But I would be fibbing were I not to say owners and chef alike have put their all into Scales and despite the rather weighty name they look on track to succeed for good reason: It’s been in the planning stages for some time and it’s been worth every minute’s “weight”.

To say Street and associates got it 100% right this soon would be a bit of an exaggeration though, so how about we say 95% right now and the potential to make that, in this reviewer’s sight, 100% in short order. But more on that 5% in just a few. Let’s start with what’s right right now, aside from the decor which gets 110% and the atmosphere which adds to that.

The menu choices here run the gamut from seafood and steaks to more esoteric items; some of which needed explanation by our smiling wait staff.

We saw a lot of familiar faces on the floor, too — some, including the maître d’ from Street & Co., one of our long-time Portland faves, and others from the recently closed Ebb & Flow and other eateries. The chef himself is late of Hugo’s and Duckfat and recognised us when we hit the door, which says a lot about the brand of personal service we encountered at Scales, even though on our first visit they had been open not even a whole week.

So what did we eat? We took the chef’s advice to “try something of everything” so after a lot of time reading the more-than-ample menu I opted for the salted cod croquettes appetiser, followed by the steak and a side of fries. Partner Ivan had the brussels sprouts for his starter and then the cod and a side of cornbread.

Aside from the latter there was nothing but smiling silence at our table. I say silence because my late mother always said she could tell when what she made was a hit with the family by how quiet we were once we dug in. If there was a lot of chatter then maybe it was so-so, a bit of chatter, then it got a decent rating and if it was quiet everyone was so enjoying the food they didn’t take time to speak. Scales definitely falls into the later category because what was on offer was delicious.

The three highlights of the meal were, to us, the brussels sprouts (above, next column) the salted cod croquettes and the steak (at right), which came out as rare as ordered and with a delicious glaze. Ivan’s entree came up a very close 4th to the items mentioned and the fries, while good, lacked the Duckfat presenta-

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tion we so adore and they came with ketchup and no other dipping sauces mentioned. Guess we are spoiled with the huge dipping sauce list Duckfat offers, but that’s why we have choices when we decide to go out.

About the only food disappointment was the cornbread, which while served with some wonderful butter, was more the taste and consistency of something between a real cornbread and a corn pudding or soufflé. Being a Southern boy by birth, I found it failed to really be classifiable and Ivan left me a large part to try as it did not hit home with his Southern Indiana palate and the memories of his Grandma Dora’s cornbread he grew up with, either.

While we are on the topic of cornbread, let’s expand just a bit to bread in gen-

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eral, and admit that’s a large chunk of what did disappoint about Scales. They do not serve any bread unless it is ordered and paid for. As co-owned Standard Baking Company, the town’s best bread baker, is just across Commercial Street, we were expecting not only great bread like the Rustica served with all entrees at Street & Co. but maybe even something better, assuming such could exist.

We will confess the cornbread disappointed and we declined to spring for the Parker House Rolls as they, like the $4 for the cornbread were not included, but were an add-on. Considering the $102 we spent to dine for two, it really wouldn’t hurt for the owners to offer bread as an included item, even if that means adding 50¢ to the cost of the entrees. Keeping with the scale motif, we feel not doing so is a bit penny wise, but pound foolish!

That aside, we do feel we got so-so, but not great value for what we spent. The entrees were $30 for the steak and $27 for the cod and the appetisers were $6.50 for the sprouts but $9.50 for the croquettes. Add in two hard ciders ($6 each) and we had no problem running up that tab.

Come puoi dire (How can you say) you have never been to Anthony’s?

• 24 years on Middle Street • 100 year old recipes • Home of the Real Italian • 60 sandwiches

• 15 Italian dinners • 10 pizzas • Beer and wine • FREE parking

151 Middle St. • Portland, ME • 774-8668 Boston atmosphere with Portland prices anthonysitaliankitchen.com

A word, too, about service at Scales. On a scale of oneto-ten right now we will say it gets an eight. There were long gaps between visits by the smiling wait staff, including close to 25 minutes between the drink order and the taking of our entree requests. As we had to ask what some of the menu items were and how served, being a new experience, it would have been nice with the place less than three quarters full on a Monday night about eight to have had a bit more prompt service. That aside, the smiles, the patience explaining and the fact they got us seated promptly despite a change in our reservation time meaning our reservation got lost in the system more than made up for the gaps and earned staff the 20% we happily left. Once the machine gets a bit better oiled and the scales performing a bit better we’d be willing to bet, given the firm’s other eateries, that this one will feature stellar, not merely good, service.

So our overall opinion? Great decor and atmosphere. More than passable service even in these early days. A grand menu (and one with a huge dessert choice we got too full to even try, but plan to, especially the New England Indian Pudding) and it appears the owners have another heavy-weight on their hands.

We’d be willing to bet in season all 145 seats in the place will be on “weight” list and we’d also bet the lines will stretch next door to the Casco Bay Ferry Lines Terminal most weekends.

As for us, the chat on our walk home centered on do we change from our go-to special occasion place of Street & Company to Scales or stay at Street. Each got one vote, so it’s a tie right now. I like the lobster and pasta too well to ever leave Street & Co., whereas Ivan loved the new enterprise and said hard as the choice will be, he would opt for Scales. Guess as far as the owners are concerned do they want our cash in their left or right pockets?

Good news is my May birthday is the next “occasion” so look for us at Street & Company then. But that doesn’t mean we won’t have been back to Scales a few times before that. It’s been worth the weight to get opened and without pounding the puns any harder we can say the owners are not light-weights on the Portland dining scene for a reason. Come find out why as soon as you get or make time. Oh, and try the huge scale before, not after, you eat!

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More Food For Thought...

Moving right along, This reviewer is fully aware that it does take a special occasion for a $102 dinner, (and we failed to mention Scales won’t be doing lunches until later this Spring) so where to go for a bit less buck but plenty of bang?

Let’s head to the west end of the Peninsula and Aurora Provisions at 64 Pine Street, where we had a wonderful lunch on a cool day recently.

Aurora is one of those spots we have been hearing about ever since we arrived in town last Spring and we only now managed to get time (and a parking spot in their crowded lot and neighbourhood) to try. We are sorry we waited this long as while we felt the pricing was fair value for money, the food was worth every cent.

Aurora is one of those places where one can easily get confused. They have some items prepared in a cold case, others and soups they make and offer upon ordering and they have desserts filling a case which all look todie-for. As the saying goes, you can’t do it all in just one trip, so plan several.

The website advertises “Beautiful Food For Busy People” and we’d not contest that as the staff and customers all seem to be dashing to and fro a lot, but once you get a table things slow down and lunch was a relaxing break in what was a busy day for us. They do open early with breakfast (including breakfast burritos) from 8 a.m., but all our friends touted the delicious lunches (11 a.m. to 3 p.m. except Sundays) and with good reason: what’s on the plates is delicious and we were especially thrilled to get a good soup (“worries go down better with soup” the website says). They offer a wide choice daily and the soups are made in-house so do not look for any Campbells cans in the dumpsters out back — just a lot of the west end’s seagulls hoping a dumpster doesn’t close or a patron takes pity upon these rotund birds waiting for a hand-out.

That said, to go along with the soups (there were at least three we can recall the day we visited, including a cream of mushroom we had, shown above) Aurora Provisions has some wicked good sandwiches. To mention just a few we recall and after a check with the website (www.auroraprovisions.com) to jog the memory are: a Fresh Mozzarella Sandwich (Tomato, cucumber, fresh mozzarella & basil mayonnaise on rosemary focaccia), Roasted Vegetable Sandwich (Portabella mushrooms, red peppers, zucchini, red onions, fresh spinach & herbed goat cheese spread on rosemary focaccia), an Avocado Wrap (Sharp Vermont cheddar, shredded cabbage, romaine & cilantro, tomatoes and chipotle mayo in a soft tortilla) and even a Turkey & Cranberry Sandwich with House roasted turkey breast with cranberry-port relish, mayo & romaine on peasant bread.

But the healthy soups and sandwiches aside, do not leave Aurora Provisions without one (or several) of their delicious desserts. They go well with a coffee after (or instead of) lunch. Items all come from local suppliers to their in-house

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baker, so look for things in their bakery department (above) you can’t find too many places, but you will wonder how you did without so long. Most of the items appear to be made on the spot, and all are grand. The place also has a small, but very well-stocked grocery and gourmet department where we spotted everything from our British Maldon Sea Salt to a wide selection of coffees and other items. Aurora lunch for two came to $32.32 plus tip for the hard-working staff and was well worth the cash.

But what about days we don’t even want to spend $32? How about lunch for two with tip for under $20? For that we point our Jeep out to 1041 Brighton Avenue where you will find Panda Garden — the place we think has the town’s best Chinese. We know not everyone will agree and some might find the strip centre location a bit of a put off, but remember this is about what’s on the plates and not the decor, which my late Grandpa Fred always said “is nice, but you can’t eat it!” Actually the inside decor belies the outside bland and the restaurant is well appointed and decorated.

As far as the plates, at Panda Garden what you can eat is a selection from their huge menu, and their lunch specials come in at well under $10 each, including an appetiser of the day, a choice of soup, fried or white rice and an entree served in large portions.

We will admit we are partial to their hot and sour soup and egg rolls, too, though on our most recent visit the soup came with the appetiser of the day which was crab rangoon. Other days it’s been chicken wings, but regardless of the choice, it’s all good, which is what counts.

The unobtrusive, but very attentive staff here will start you out with a bowl of crispy noodles and a grand dipping sauce (also included) and tea comes along, too, making that $20 for two lunches an even greater deal at noontime. I know my neighbours say that Empire on Congress Street is their Chinese of choice and others like the Golden Lotus, also on Congress, but we have not found either measures up to Panda Garden and neither comes even close when it comes to cost.

Dinner at Panda Garden is also good, though not quite as much a bargain, but with enough food to easily order, share and still have some to take home, dinner is also a steal. For either meal, we are quite partial to their Moo Goo Gai Pan (above right) and the Beef with Broccoli, but we have eaten top to bottom on

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their long menu and never had anything but a smile at meal’s end — which, we should mention, includes a fortune cookie. You can find us here two or three times a month, so this one is definitely worth getting off the peninsula for.

The parking is also a bonus, because if you are driving, you can park free at Panda Garden right out front. Contrast that to our downtown, which is becoming more and more a parker’s nightmare so that free parking gets more than a few extra points for Panda, too.

Our recommendation is go try Panda Garden if you have not been yet. Take a $20 bill along for lunch and a bring a friend. You will both leave with smiles on your faces and you won’t need the cookie fortune to say that you won’t have to spend a fortune. You might even have an extra buck to spend on something else later. This is good food, well-served and at a price that those who wince at my reviews of $102 dinners can live with. I promise. Hours are six days a week from 11.30 a.m., Sundays from noon. Last orders are at 9 weekdays; 10 Fridays and Saturdays and 9 p.m.

Sundays.

Bits & bites... Happy belated first anniversary to the fine food and staff at East Ender. It’s been just over a year since current ownership took over, remade the restaurant’s menus and image and gave Portland another award winner. We hear tell they are about to close for a few days to do some needed remodelling, but never fear, it will be a very brief closure to update the bar area, signage and add some new seating. Happy anniversary! ... Also on the menu downtown, as of presstime Ebb & Flow down on Commercial Street had ebbed into nothingness, but we hear tell about (or shortly after) these words hit print it will reopen as a pasta and pizza restaurant with a new chef. The former format has departed from this, one of the city’s largest dining spaces, with the old chef who moved to North Carolina...

And speaking of departures, all the best to Harraseeket Inn’s former dining room manager John Vallo who left Maine for New York City a few days ago.

The inn continues to offer the best food around at lunch in the Broad Arrow Tavern and on Sundays and holidays in the Maine Harvest Dining Room. Do not miss one of their Sunday lobster brunches, and the lunches (weekdays & Saturdays) are none too shabby, either. Best of luck, John! ... And finally, if you have not tried the new breakfast pizzas at Micucci’s now is the time. They are available Tuesdays through Saturdays from 8.30 a.m. and are a great addition to our favourite Italian grocer’s choices. If you can’t find Micuccis just have a look over at Middle & India streets. And to help along, we hear new signage is on the way to replace what’s been out front for awhile now. Follow the signs or your nose to some of the best eats in town — whether you eat ‘em there or take out or shop and cook yourself for later!

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The Standard Reviewer

By Bill Elliott / Up Portland’s Film & Theatre Reviewer

On the surface, Zootopia, the new animated action-comedy caper from Disney Studios is another in a long series of the company’s computer-animated films aimed at young children. It features cute and cuddly anthropomorphised animals doing the kinds of things cute and cuddly animated animals do to make kids laugh. It also contains enough scary animals to inform kids — in the same way that scary animals in fairy tales let children know — that the world is not always a benign place of loving families and happy endings.

But beneath the laughter and adorable shenanigans of bunnies, foxes, elephants, giraffes, mice, sloths, and a host of other creatures, Zootopia is — as its title suggests — a utopian fantasy of egalitarianism, tolerance, fairness and justice for all.

Because the film resonates with so many social, political, and economic themes, it is essentially an allegory in the same mould as classics such as Animal Farm, Gulliver’s Travels and The Pilgrim’s Progress.

None of which really matters much to kids, of course. Except they cannot miss the message that social structures should operate along lines that are fair and just and in which tolerance and acceptance should be the norm. In an election year in which exclusion, divisiveness, and fear seem to be the trending themes of almost all the Republican front runners, hats off to Disney for making the first anti-Trump film of 2016.

The film’s premise revolves around a tiny bunny rabbit named Judy Hops, who is born into a family of carrot farmers (She is one of 275 siblings in a town whose population increases by the millisecond!) but who dreams of becoming a police officer in the giant metropolis, Zootopia.

fear, exclusion, and isolation becomes the hallmarks of the kind of new world order peddled by Donald Trump and Ted Cruz.

Zootopia is, first and foremost, gloriously funny. There are so many visual and verbal gags that it is hard to know where to start (and stop). The wonder of animated film technology is that filmmakers can fill the screen with so much information in each frame that each subsequent viewing delivers something new and enjoyable. In that way, the filmmakers can keep the kids entertained with slapstick-y action while keeping the parents happy with verbal jokes that go directly over kids’ heads.

There is one hilarious scene in an animal nudist colony, where Judy is shocked to see animals not wearing any clothes. The lemmings who line up to buy Nick’s “downsized� popsicles all work at Lemmings Brothers Bank (get it?). Judy’s iPhone bears a carrot logo instead of an apple. The film can also be quite self-referential at times, drawing attention to its own artifice and the conventions of animated movies. One character tells Judy: “Life isn’t a cartoon where you sing an insipid little song and all your dreams come true.�

Two of the funniest sequences (which become running gags in the film) feature, firstly, a mafia-run underworld in Tundratown, the frozen wasteland governed by Mr. Big. While the inhabitants of Tundratown are mostly polar bears, Judy is shocked to find that the real ruler is a tiny rat who speaks in a Marlon Brando-Godfather voice and threatens to “ice� his opponents (literally by dropping them in ice). The characterization is both apt and very funny.

The other outstanding scene is the one featured in the film’s trailer. In tracking down a vehicle in the missing otter case, Judy seeks the help of one of Nicks’ friends at the local DMV. The office is overseen by sloths who take forever not only running information through their computers, but even greeting customers. Of course, long lines of irritated customers ensues. It is a very funny scene. But, while it is a tent pole sequence, just about Hosted by Friends of the Eastern Promenade every scene in the film & Munjoy Hill Neighborhood Organization reflects the same high SATURDAY,  APRIL  23  •  9:00  AM  TO  NOON  quality.

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Her mother and father are generally supportive of her, but no rabbit has ever become a police officer before. Judy’s father tells her, soberly, “It’s OK to have dreams as long as you don’t believe in them.� After seeing her bunny school friends bullied by an aggressive teenaged fox, Judy is even more determined to follow her dream. She enrols in the Zootopia Police Academy, and after a tough start, she rises to become one of the academy’s best cadets, graduating at the top of her class.

She is assigned to be an officer in Zootopia, but is initially disillusioned when she is given the mundane task of issuing traffic tickets. Still, if that is her job, she decides to be the best she can be, issuing more than 200 tickets before noon her first day.

In the course of her duties, she stumbles on a scam by streetwise fox, named Nick Wilde, who is running a “popsicle laundering� scheme, reselling giant popsicles (aimed at the elephant market) in a downsized form for local lemmings.

Judy manages to get Nick’s confession on tape and uses the recording to blackmail him into helping her work on a missing person (actually a missing otter) case.

At a point when many animated films fall back on tired formulas, overblown pop song montage sequences, and middle sections that operate on autopilot, Zootopia moves from inventive idea to even more wildly innovative ideas.

The storyline is quite remarkable in that it shies away from the obvious and the tread worn and breaks new ground at every step. Judy and Nick are pulled into a world of political intrigue, dark-shadowed conspiracies, Mafioso-type underworld figures, and Breaking Bad-type homemade-drug cartels. The film’s undertone of political corruption echoes the dark days of Nixon and foreshadow a future America in which

Page 10

Along with spring’s arrival comes our 24th April Stools Day. As a community effort, please join in helping clean up the park and neighborhood of rubbish, refuse and dog waste.

MEET at the Hill House: 92 Congress Street at 9:00 am April 23rd for coffee, tea and goodies, or stop by any location listed to the right between 9am-­noon. Supplies provided. Volunteer and earn a free coffee token for Coffee By Design.

With help from Southern Maine Landlord Association, we invite pet parents, neighborhood residents and children to join in for this year’s 24th annual April Stools Day!

$25 GIFT CERTIFICATES awarded to those 1$* 5) *)! *" .$! " (*/- 3 *' !) /, - 4 - 4 $ )&- -* (/ $ .* */, -+*)-*,- *" .$%-

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Zootopia is a delight on every level. It is intelligent, innovative, and hilariously funny from start to finish. As a film about overcoming prejudice and ignorance, it reflects the America we currently find ourselves in, facing a choice between the autocratic, fearmongering, and dictatorial style of Donald Trump, and the mild, American, all-inclusive utopianism of Bernie Sanders. Zootopia comes out in favour of Sanders and tolerance, equality, and fairness win the day. That’s not a bad lesson for kids to learn in 2016.

Letting The Cat Out Of The Bag

By Stacy Begin / Owner, Two Fat Cats Bakery

The Big Deal About Food Once upon a time, in a previous life, I attended a stuffy panel discussion on behalf of the organisation I represented. I can’t tell you the name of the panel, what it was about or why I was even there. My memory fades with time. In fact everything about that panel is fuzzy to me, with one very distinct exception: A representative from a big box grocery store was one of the panelists.

I remember this purely due to one brief exchange that took place. In response to a question, one panelist threw a little shade towards the grocery store, suggesting that running out of certain products was not a big deal compared to other problems. To which the supermarket rep rejoined passionately that, yes, in fact it was a big deal.

Customers expect his business to stock everything they need to make Nana’s famous lasagna, to bake that special birthday cake — the one that is requested every, single year — to recreate the national dish they ate in their homeland or to discover that ethnic ingredient they can find nowhere else.

Food is memory, celebration, emotion, and, maybe most importantly, ritual.

Running out of something at a big grocery store, yes, to the customer it is a very, very big deal.

Brilliant, I thought back then, never realising that I would be giving the same speech to many, many of my employees at Two Fat Cats. My speech is a little different, but it goes something like this: our cakes and pies turn up at anniversary parties, going away parties, formal and informal dinners, charity events and birthdays galore.

These are important milestones and celebrations ...and dessert is a centerpiece.

It may be one of many cakes to us, but it is very special to the customer and we should always bear that in mind. You see, food is a big deal in ways that don’t show up on Instagram and Facebook.

There will be, of course, times when we will run out of a pastry or don’t have enough lead time to make a cake. But our job is to try to say “yes” as often as possible and to the best of our capacity. When we can’t accommodate a customer or worse yet we fail in the execution, it is devastating and I don’t mind confessing that a lot of navel gazing goes on when these efforts fall below our standards.

Case in point: A first time customer paid us a visit last Summer. He told us that he was recently diagnosed with terminal cancer. After seeing us on PBS, he added a trip to Two Fat Cats to his bucket list and here he was all the way from New Mexico ready to try a whoopie pie.

I don’t think I can convey in words how touched and humbled we were by his story. It was an incredible moment until an alarm sounded in my head: I didn’t see any whoopie pies in our retail case!

You have got to be kidding! We have got to have at least one whoopie pie around. We have to!! Please great whoopie pie god, help us out here.

And the whoopie pie god did – there was a tray of just-out-of the-oven whoopie pies ready to go. And for us and our New Mexico friend, it was a very big deal.

Up Portland 04.16 On The Web At: www.upportland.com Page 11

Cheverus Students Bring Music to Veterans

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On a recent Sunday, Robert Bossong and Ana Guggenheim, two Cheverus students, warmed the hearts of 25 residents at the Maine Veterans’ Home in Scarborough with music. The students played a selection of classical and contemporary violin duets including a solo of Monti’s well-known “Czardas” performed by Ana Guggenheim, which was especially well-received by the audience.

WEIGHT ROOM M OV E M E N T R O O M M A SS AG E A N D E N E R G Y W O R K P E RS O N A L T R A I N I N G F I T N E SS C L A SS E S YO G A

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Eric’s Optimal Corner Liam Pinson / Optimal Self Community Health and Wellness Center (EDITOR’S NOTE—This month’s column is by Liam Pinson, a Portland-based trainer and kayak instructor who works part time at Optimal Self with owner Eric Hilton.)

Have you ever wondered what determines your energy swings throughout the day?

Our bodies do not and cannot stay in one gear all the time. While it is somewhat simplified, your body has two primary states — and it wouldn’t be an oversimplification to call them yin and yang.

The nervous system is sort of a transmission system for the body, and determines whether you will be in sympathetic or parasympathetic mode. To put it simply, the sympathetic nervous system is responsible for all yang energy in the body - reaction to stress, physical movement, mental acuity, all are channelled through the sympathetic. This is the gear we want to be in when we exercise, when we focus on mental tasks — such as me writing this article — when we engage in sexual activity and more broadly, when we express ourselves.

The parasympathetic nervous system is responsible for the body’s yin energy.

It is restorative, digestive and receptive. You cannot actively be parasympathetic aside from one activity, meditation, and even then you might find your mind naturally arriving in a sympathetic state. Just because digesting is a trigger of parasympathetic hormones and processes does not mean that putting food in your mouth will start this response. So understanding this, here are some tips to make sure that your meals are maximally restorative, and best digested.

— First, Calm down. I don’t care how hungry you are, food is nearly guaranteed to us here in the first world, so your muscles will not disappear or your stomach eat itself. If something else is stressing you out, try taking a brisk stroll before sitting down to eat.

—Move more. Aside from sitting to eat, and resting to digest, we are meant to be bodies in motion more hours out of the day than not. Moving more will increase your daily caloric expenditure, improve your hormonal profile, and trigger a greater restorative response from food. You’ve gotta spend some time expressing yourself, burning energy, in order to create a demand for restoration.

—Stay hydrated. Both movement and a lack of movement, in and around meals, demands more water. Exercise — aerobic and anaerobic — disturbs homeostasis (balance, if you will), and water is the only thing which can wash you back to baseline. Things which claim to alkalize your digestive system or your cells will never compare to the healing properties of plain, old water. It’s the solvent of the whole planet.

—Sit down. Sitting allows more blood to return to the abdomen and relaxes the muscles of the lower back, which are primary signallers of stress response. It is difficult to enter a parasympathetic state while your muscles are still working against gravity.

hind nothing but breathing has been well studied to promote restfulness, lower all markers of stress, and in short, trigger the parasympathetic. Deep breathing before a meal will help stimulate the contraction of smooth muscle in the intestines, clearing the way to absorb more nutrients.

—Chew your food. Your mom and probably grandmother said “chew each mouthful 100 times!” which is a bit overdone, but this one shouldn’t require much explanation: Your stomach doesn’t have teeth! Digestion begins in the mouth with enzymes released in your saliva.

—Don’t drink anything with your meal! Drinking stimulates gastric emptying, and blood, along with water in your body, is pulled away from the digestive system. Think of it as a flushing signal. Drinking water with a meal or while food remains in your stomach cuts short the time your stomach needs to break down food into workable pieces for the small intestine to absorb. With food in your stomach, you want to maximise abdominal blood flow and minimise muscular exertion. Think conserving energy. Make sure you give your stomach at least 15 minutes after the last bite before you start sipping anything. As my publisher told me his old childhood babysitter, Miss Smith, back in Kentucky used to tell him: “Only drink after you have eaten to fill in the cracks between your food.”

That is, of course, an over-simplification but in any case, and however you say it, she was right. Wait to drink!

—Watch out for coffee. Coffee is really amazing stuff, and the only pre-workout I’ll ever use. That being said, it has the potential to absolutely wreak havoc on your digestive system. Caffeine is a stimulant, and stimulants stimulate the sympathetic nervous system, draw blood away from the digestive system, and put tension in the muscles of the low back and legs. Bottom line - drink coffee on an empty stomach first thing in the morning or with small quantities of the lightest foods - think light vegan eating with coffee. Fresh fruit, honey, or coconut oil mixed right into your java are all acceptable, but of course add calories which will need to be burnt before you start mining those fat stores. Is it ok to drink coffee after a meal? Yes, but wait three hours at least.

—Eat significant meals. Nobody ever lost weight eating like a bird. The metabolism slows to a crawl and the body starts turning muscle protein into vital organ tissue. When you do sit down to eat, make sure you’re getting at least a third of your daily protein, along with some carbohydrates or fat. All three together do have some drawbacks, but nothing significant. You’re eating now with an intent to rest and repair, so make sure you’re supplying a good portion of the necessary materials to fuel this recovery.

—And finally, always stop before you feel full. You don’t want a meal to be so large that it expands your stomach so much that it puts pressure on the other internal organs. Also, you only really have so much stomach acid, meaning there is a maximum amount of food your stomach can actually break down and make available at any given time. Lunch is indisputably when you will be able to digest the most, so plan that to be the “heaviest” of your meals.

Keeping all of this in mind, understand that eating might take more time than you previously allowed, and so I recommend you plan time for eating into your days. As stressful and overfilled as our modern lifestyle tends to be, eating should be a break, so put away that phone or laptop, talk to your dining companions and above all, enjoy your meals.

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—Breathe deeply, and exhale your stress. Putting your conscious thought be-

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Some Comments From Up Portland So it was about mid-afternoon on 27th March, which happened to be Easter Sunday, that I headed out to the grocery with a long list and found the doors locked.

It was, I guessed silly that my fave store was shut and so I drove to another — this time in South Portland — only to find the door locked there and a Happy Easter sign posted.

I returned home, shopping list in hand and fumed that my usual stores were all shut.

So the next morning, determined to find out why, and with the fact that friends in Kentucky, Indiana and even New Hampshire said they took care of their weekly shop or at least bought some last-minute things for a family dinner on the 27th, I dug into it.

I called my local groceries and got “non-answers” as to why they were closed, though most were centred around the line “Don’t you want our staff to be with their families on the holiday?”

I explained I was not a Scrooge, but that I am not Christian and did not keep Easter and that everywhere I have ever lived before stores, at least some, were open for business on Easter day. None of the folks I talked to knew why they were closed here — just that they were.

That got me online and looking further, which is where I discovered on the Retail Association of Maine’s website (www.retailmaine.com) the answer which eluded all the folks I spoke with: If you have a store with over 5,000 square feet of retail (and are not L.L. Bean or sell items the website calls “Establishments primarily selling boats, boating equipment, sporting equipment, souvenirs and novelties.”) you have to close on Thanksgiving, Christmas and — aha! here it is — Easter!

Maine, per the retail association is one of only three states clinging to the old (dare we say “ancient”?) blue law rules for Thanksgiving and one can assume Christmas and Easter. The others are nearby Rhode Island and Massachusetts, just in case you were wondering.

So we guess that it’s this newspaper’s time to say we need a change. I am all for family holidays, get-togethers and religious or just fun times. 100% in favour, so make no mistake. But we are also against the state (this one or any one) telling anybody when they must close their doors. To us, the matter is worse because two of the three dates specified are Christian holidays. We do not see any of the Shinto, Buddhist, Jewish, Muslim or other religious days mandated for closures, and we like that. In our way of believing, it’s none of anyone’s — and certainly not the state’s — business to tell anybody when to work and when to rest.

Let’s see what the Retail Association website has to say about prospect for changes. Quoting here: “Will Maine ever change the law? Interestingly, the 2013 and 2015 legislative session each saw two bills to change the law. Both were defeated and both drew support and opposition from our members. However, one of the bills had an interesting discussion. It looked to increase the 5,000 sq. ft. exemption to 7,500 sq. ft. The reason was a small, Maine grocery store used to be less than 5,000 sq. ft. They expanded and added jobs but are now greater than 5,000 sq. ft. and Thanksgiving was always one of their busiest days. Where once they could be open, now they must close...”

Our guess is the legislature will not act without enough of us who went to shop on Easter (or Christmas or Thanksgiving) letting our state representatives know we are interested in a change. Our stand as a paper is clear: Let’s let the store owners make the decision, keeping in mind that they have employees who have

friends and families they like to get together with.

Back in crazy Indiana, any store could be open, but in most cases working on the holiday was a volunteer basis. Employees were asked who wanted to work and many, like Millie, our fave cashier at the old O’Malia’s Supermarket always signed up. Why? She was in her 70s, had kids in another state who she saw often (but not on Easter) and liked the idea of working to pass the time on an otherwise boring day. She also would wink and say the time-and-a-half the boss offered was a good holiday bonus, too.

So is it time for Maine to change? Up Portland says a loud yes. But we want to hear what readers feel, too. If you agree with us, give your legislature a yell and tell them to let the stores and employees decide. If you disagree, we’d like to hear that and why, too. Maybe we have it all wrong...or maybe not. Comments in the mail, e-mail (ted@upportland.com) or via the website at www.upportland. com Meanwhile, now that Easter is behind us, I got to get to the store and get that list taken care of!

Ted Fleischaker, Publisher

Up Portland 04.16 On The Web At: www.upportland.com Page 15

The Buck Stops Here

Celebrating milestones — Birthdays, weddings, graduations and other events can quickly become costly. Look at your budget and determine what you can afford to spend on gifts and travel expenses before the invitations start rolling in. Also use your budget as a guide to your decisions on when to decline an invitation to an out-ofstate wedding, graduation or other expensive event.

By Luke Reinhard / Advisor — Ameriprise Financial

As the weather heats up, so does the planning for vacations, graduations, weddings and family reunions. Your packed event schedule could impact your financial health, so it’s important to set expectations with your family and friends early in the planning process. Talking about money with family members and friends can feel awkward, but in some instances, not talking about financial expectations upfront can create stress and tension down the road. It could also leave you with a larger dent in your pocketbook than you expected.

Practicing good financial etiquette can help you smooth the way and minimise complicated financial situations. Establishing a budget and knowing what you can — and cannot — afford to spend, is the first step. The next is clearly and proactively communicating your financial boundaries to other involved parties. To help you get started, here are a few tips on how to approach some common financial discussions with grace.

Going out for dinner — Before you make a reservation or stop somewhere for a bite to eat as a group, discuss your price range preference, and reach an agreement on whether to split the bill evenly or ask for separate tabs. If you are on a tight budget, simply say so. Most people will understand and agree to separate tabs at an affordable location.

Giving gifts — If you plan to go in on a large gift with someone else, be clear about your spending range before the shopping begins. If you’re the one purchasing the gift, it’s important that the total cost of the gift doesn’t put a financial strain on your shortterm finances. It may be unlikely, but if the other party unexpectedly can’t reimburse you for their portion, it could also strain your relationship.

Co-hosting an event — Whether you’re hosting a barbeque with neighbours, a family reunion or your child’s wedding with your ex-spouse, it’s important to discuss the budget for the event and how the costs will be divided before the planning begins.

What’s more, if someone is donating their time — for example, to clean their house or create the floral arrangements for the event — factor the going rate for their services and the number of hours the task will take and give credit where credit is due. Doing so will help all parties feel recognised and appreciated for their contributions.

Planning a vacation — When travelling with others, agree up-front on a budget and who will pay for what before you hit the road. If you are booking the trip in advance — and cannot book accommodations or other aspects of the trip separately — ask your fellow travellers for reimbursement up-front so that you’re not left feeling cheated or financially strained. If you are the one responsible for reimbursing someone else, do so before you depart for your destination. It will make it easier for everyone.

Keep in mind with today’s busy lifestyles, details can easily get lost in the shuffle.

When planning larger group events or trips, consider creating a shared document that outlines the proposed budget and who is responsible for what costs and when payments are due. This will help minimise misunderstandings, making these events less stressful — and more enjoyable — for everyone involved.

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Page 16

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Processed Media

By Randy Dankievitch — TV Critic / TVOvermind By the time this article publishes, most of the world that’s going to see Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice will have seen it — and if you’re like me, having suffered through the 155-minute, slow-motion atrocity of a film that is Sad Batman Kind of Fights Sad Superman, there’s an undeniable sense of dissatisfaction with how that “film” played out. But why? How does a film with so many iconic characters, adapting so many iconic comic moments to build out a cinematic universe, go so wrong? I’ve got a couple ideas – and a couple thoughts on what Zak Snyder and his creative team could grasp onto this film to save the universe before it’s DOA. —Editing: arguably this film’s biggest issue is how it was edited by David Brenner and written by Chris Terrio and David S. Goyer. There isn’t a scene in this film over 90 seconds (save for the titular heavyweight bout, which we’ll get to in a second), and every single scene fades in and out of black, regardless of its context. With nearly a dozen running plot threads flying around at any given point, it’s not a surprise there are a lot of scenes for BvS to speed through – but the movie’s complete lack of comprehensible plot or sense of progression completely sucks the energy out of the room; an unfortunate malady the film’s shoddy over-editing only further destroys.

—It Wastes the Best Members of Its Cast: I’m fine with a sad, broody Batman (more on him in a minute) and a stoic, doll-like Superman: pushed through Snyder’s ridiculously barren emotional filter and inherent need to have them fight, boiling them down to their essence is unsurprising, if not necessary. But it’s unforgivable how this film absolutely wastes Amy Adams and Laurence Fishburne; the former makes puppy eyes at Clark/Supes for 2.5 hours, and Fishburne doesn’t have a single line that isn’t a potential Daily Planet headline. “Underutilised” is a criminally underrated statement for how openly this film wastes its most talented cast members (forget about Diane Lane: she’s a damsel in distress for two minutes, and invisible elsewhere).

—It’s a Film Without Conflict: This entire film is constructed around Batman and Superman misunderstanding each other at a key moment, ultimately a ruse designed by Lex Luthor to take over the world (I think? I don’t really know what the hell he was trying to accomplish). However, this film never grasps onto the underlying philosophies of why Batman is so angry or Superman is so altruistic to generate conflict: this film just conjures an excuse for them to throw each other around for five minutes, a climatic moment the movie itself doesn’t even have faith in being a key moment, since it shifts its attention almost immediately to a new alien threat.

—Thomas Wayne: this plays into the conflict comments. In the opening scene, the iconic flashback detailing the death of Bruce Wayne’s parents plays out in predictably Snyder-ian fashion. The woman dies doing nothing (by the way, f*** you Snyder for that shot of Martha’s pearls), and Thomas dies aggressively reaching to punch the most infamous mugger in American comic history. Rather than die protecting his son – the freakin’ tenant Batman’s entire philosophy is built upon – Thomas Wayne dies trying to fight, in turn completely re-engineering Batman’s journey…. Which in Snyder’s case, is reducing him to a guy with unresolved mommy issues, a silly bit of character that is arguably the most important moment in the entire film (sure explains why this Batman is cool using guns and murdering people on the regular, though).

—Bruce Wayne’s Annoying Omnipotence: how this movie manipulates Bruce Wayne into serving the purpose of franchise-building is astonishing. Forget how little we actually get to see Batman kick ass (that aren’t in dream sequences, which are numerous, lengthy, and silly), or do anything remotely resembling “The World’s Greatest Detective”: the most aggressively awful thing BvS does is force Bruce’s character to shove in a bunch of nonsense about “what’s to come”, be it his apparent omnipotence (who is this guy, Ms. Cleo? He has visions of The Flash from the friggin’ future) or the “files” he finds on Lex Luthor’s computer, which are then watched later, in another scene, by a then-unnamed Wonder Woman. It’s bad enough this film forces Batman to be utterly ineffective (and invisible) at actually being a superhero (he BRANDS PEOPLE with the Bat-Signal, for Christ’s sake) – but when his role is reduced to teasing what’s coming next, it’s clear BvS is a film completely vacant of vision, direction, or coherent characterization.

Now, let’s talk about what Batman v Superman does well: —Wonder Woman: yes, it’s obvious that Wonder Woman has absolutely no place in this film whatsoever (she literally just wanders around being mysterious and attractive for 95% of the movie) – but boy, when she debuts that costume and lets out that scream, Batman v Superman gets filled with the energy and excitement the rest of the film direly misses. This is a woman who smirks in the middle of a fight with a deadly alien, and holds her own better than the brooding, whiny men in suits surrounding her. While this film is an absolute failure in introducing WW and integrating her into the story in a meaningful way, boy, is it a breath of fresh air when she appears on screen.

—Nothing Else: this is a really, really bad movie, y’all. The Cyborg video is kind of cool, I guess?

Sauntering With Mat

By Mat Robedee / Up Portland Commentator

Mat was just driving back into Portland about the time these words were headed to press, but we are promised a whole report next month (and likely the one after as well). Here’s what he told his Facebook friends (and what we are sure will be included): After 7,357.5 miles of driving in exactly three weeks, I am thankful to be home.

•Maine •Great Smokey Mountains National Park, Tennessee.

•Brantley Lake State Park, New Mexico.

•Carlsbad Caverns National Park, New Mexico.

•Guadalupe Mountains National Park, Texas.

•Marfa, Texas.

•Big Bend Ranch State Park, Texas.

•100 mile drive along the Rio Grande/border with Mexico.

•Big Bend National Park, Texas.

•Austin, Texas.

•New Orleans •Oak Alley Plantation •Manatee Springs State Park, Florida.

•Boynton Beach, Florida.

•Florida Keys & Key West.

•Alligator Alley, Georgia.

•Washington D.C.

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Beyond The Forecast

By Jack Sillin / Weatherman & Meterology Student Hello everyone!

In this month’s Factors Behind The Forecast I wanted to discuss forecast uncertainty. It’s something you see all the time with especially volatile Maine weather.

“Too early to tell”, “This is a very uncertain forecast” and “subject to change” are all phrases you’ll hear often in both my forecast discussions and the forecast discussions of every respected meteorologist around. A common misconception is that forecasters use these phrases because we’re bumbling idiots trying to keep our jobs or trying to cover our tracks if the forecast goes south. However, despite that widespread notion, Mother Nature, especially in Maine, can be legitimately fickle. It is often quite difficult to predict what she will do in the future.

I could find dozens of times in the past year where forecasts have been tricky, come down to the wire, involved many moving parts, or have otherwise necessitated strong wording to convey the potential for changes. However, I don’t have to look too far into the rear view mirror to find one of the trickiest forecasts in recent years where, in the matter of a few days, solutions ranging from blizzards to complete misses and everything in between were not only somewhat on the table, but completely possible.

Computer models forecasters use as guidance were all over the place. If you follow weather even a little bit, you likely know of the two models, the GFS (American), and the ECMWF (European). There are many other models out there but those are the two get the most media attention. For days leading up to the event, the Euro (statistically speaking superior) forecast a blockbuster blizzard with feet of snow and whipping winds. The GFS (statistically speaking, a close second), meanwhile, saw the storm passing harmlessly offshore. Most other models were in the middle but had solutions closer to the Euro. After looking at the pattern on a very large scale (Western Hemisphere), it seemed as though a large snowstorm was likely.

Forecasts were issued as such on the evening of Thursday 17th March, with the obligatory “this is several days out” qualifier to make sure people didn’t panic. Forecasters were still a little skeptical of a blockbuster storm, but overall, sizeable impacts did begin to appear likely. The message my forecast, and the forecasts I saw, were trying to get across was that people should begin to be watching more closely than they already do so they could be prepared should a significant storm pan out.

On Friday, the 18th, things changed. An upper level disturbance drifting across the Dakotas wasn’t spinning up fast enough. This was observed on water vapour

satellite and on the upper air analysis done by the Storm Prediction Centre. This disturbance was supposed to dig south and join up with another disturbance over Colorado. They were to then move east and pick up Subtropical moisture before heading up the East Coast. However, if the Dakota disturbance was weaker, it wasn’t going to be strong enough to pull the moisture north. Models picked up on this and shifted significantly towards the GFS with its “no storm” solution.

For my evening forecast on 18th March I focused on two possibilities: a stronger/ slower storm, and a weaker/faster storm. I showed model forecasts depicting each solution, explained what each would bring, and then issued my own forecast with expected accumulations and a write-up describing what impacts I thought we would see as well as how the forecast could change. I wanted to put all the options on the table so that people could see what the range of possibilities included. There were still conflicting signals among observations and models that indicated a stronger storm was possible, but the blockbuster blizzard was seeming increasingly far fetched. My forecast for Portland: 2-4”.

The trend of less snow continued, for the most part, on Saturday, 3/19. The forecast began to focus on a disturbance moving ashore in Northern British Columbia, Canada. This disturbance was forecast by the models showing a bigger storm to race SE and join up with the upper low from the Dakota disturbance. They were forecast, by the models bullish on snowfall, to combine and form a larger storm that would be stronger, closer to the coast, and would therefore bring more snow.

Most guidance (models) on the 19th shifted a little bit west, bringing light to moderate snow. A complete miss was becoming less likely. A farther east solution also mean colder temperatures. After analyzing the snow growth layer and atmospheric temperatures, I also mentioned the potential for the ‘fluff factor’ to lead to higher amounts despite less liquid equivalent (QPF). My forecast for Portland on the evening of the 19th remained 2-4”.

On Sunday, the 20th, it would be fair to say that for folks trying to forecast this storm, all hell broke loose. Model guidance is available in two main ‘packages’, one overnight, and one in the afternoon. The models overnight Saturday/Sunday remained bitterly divided. Some indicated a coating-2” while others had 8-12”. Looking at observations, the polar disturbance was matching up more with the bullish models than with the bearish models. The (weaker than expected) upper low was now moving east through the Ohio river valley and the subtropical moisture was ready and waiting offshore. Everything seemed set up for a light to moderate storm but questions remained. The afternoon batch of guidance would be very important in determining which idea (more snow or less snow) prevailed. The early afternoon data was starting to come in line but the two heavyweights, the GFS and the Euro were yet to become available. All was good and well until the GFS broke. Yes, it broke. There was an error in the pre-processing where the observations from all around the world get fed into the algorithms. The long and the short of it is that there was no data from the second best model the day before the hardest to forecast storm of the season.

I then turned to the guidance I had and observations. I relentlessly scrutinized every water vapor satellite frame, every upper air analysis, every bit of model data.

As I looked carefully at the surface map, a weak low had developed much farther offshore than the main low was supposed to develop. It was dragging the frontal boundary that had all the moisture farther east. Even as the main low developed in the forecast place, it was preparing to follow the boundary out to sea. In the upper levels, the polar disturbance was a full 30-60 miles slower than even the out to sea

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ture feed, Polar disturbance) all were slower and weaker than expected. The upper level pattern even as the snow was falling screamed bust. The surface low followed the boundary out to sea and even as the snow was falling, screamed bust.

The snow was caused by a sneaky mid level storm that was a good hundred miles (maybe more) farther west than anticipated. Dynamics between 5 and 10 thousand feet caused heavy snow bands to develop and move through the region on the morning of Monday the 21st of March. 6.3” of snow fell at the jetport, and nearly every forecast I saw was too low.

Many people were, understandably, frustrated. Is it not the job of the NWS, local media meteorologists or folks like me to provide a reliable forecast for you to plan your day?

Expectations are high that forecasters know what they’re doing even as the ‘you get paid to be wrong half the time’ myth runs rampant. When you think about it, if we really were wrong half the time, you would bring your sunglasses, winter coat, t-shirt and raincoat to work or school everyday, just in case.

However, that is not how most of us live. Most of us trust some source of weather information — be it the NWS, local TV meteorologists, national TV meteorologists, or folks like me to determine for you what type of weather to expect. You expect us to do a good job and we try our very best. Sometimes we fall short. This was one of those times. I learned a lot from this storm and am now better prepared to forecast a similar one in the future. models predicted. It appeared as though it would not arrive in time to strengthen the storm in time for us to see significant snow. Everything I looked at suggested the storm would go out to sea and minimal impacts would be felt across Maine. At the same time, the critical ridge over the west coast was growing stronger than forecast. Every action has an equal opposite reaction, and that led me to believe that the trough (storm) in the east would be deeper and stronger. I was getting mixed signals not only from models which are notoriously wishy-washy, but from observations, usually rock solid. My forecast for Portland remained 2-4” but I cut back snowfall amounts for most of the rest of the area. That was my final forecast before the storm rolled in that evening.

I hope that after reading this, you understand how complex the forecast was, and why we all pretty much got it wrong. Weather forecasting is incredibly complicated.

Predicting the future is really hard and despite meteorology being an advanced science, it is but a work in progress. Remember that the next time you feel the urge to slap your favourite weatherperson!

—Jack Sillin

So what actually happened? The event took place on the morning of 21 March and featured moderate snow accumulations with many coastal areas seeing between 4 and 8” of snow. Portland saw 6.3” of snow at the Jetport. Most forecasts leading up to the event called for between 1 and 4”, including my forecast for 2-4”. Most forecasts were also fairly wishy-washy with numbers bouncing up and down by the day.

This led to confusion and questions from folks like you wondering just how much it would snow.

The NWS in Gray put out a best case scenario and a worse case scenario forecast Sunday morning (that’s it on the opposite page), about 16 hours before the snow was set to fly, to give people an idea of the range of possible outcomes. The best case scenario for Portland was not even a flake, the worst case scenario, a foot. I point that out in no way to criticize the NWS and their forecast. I point that out to help show you that even the best of the best were uncertain about how the storm would play out.

That is why I have written this article. I want to help show you how complex this forecast was. It involved all the disturbances, fronts, and ridges that I mentioned here plus many more. The position of storms near Alaska and Newfoundland mattered, too, for example. Trying to predict exactly how any one of these moving parts would act would be extremely hard, let alone trying to predict all of them and how they would all interact. Guidance was all over the place, and even when you threw all the wishy-washy guidance out, you were left with equally mixed signals from observations.

Even as the storm evolved and impacted us, observations were conflicting. The upper level features I talked about (Dakota disturbance, Colorado disturbance, mois-

Final result: A six-inch snow blanketing the Portland waterfront along Commercial Street on the morning of 21st March.

Up Portland 04.16 On The Web At: www.upportland.com Page 19

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As 2015 drew to a close, the City of Portland and Friends of the Eastern Promenade created a working group to initiate the East End Waterfront Access Project (EEWAP). The initial goal is to increase public safety & access to Casco Bay for non-motorized watercraft. Recent years have enjoyed a steady rise of recreational kayakers, rowers and windsurfers, creating capacity concerns and an immediate need to develop improvements within the East End Beach area.

An important part of the process is obtaining input from all users of this site, so the working group is hosting a moderated public forum to discuss existing conditions, project goals, introduce preliminary engineering and design concepts, and gather feedback from the public at large.

All members of the public, and in particular all active users of the East End Beach recreational area and facilities for launching non-motorized watercraft, are encouraged to attend and participate in this discussion. The process is funded by a Shore and Harbor Planning Grant through the Maine Coastal Programme and local match contribution to be raised by Friends of the Eastern Promenade. The process will be collaboratively managed by the City of Portland and Friends of the Eastern Promenade.

Questions? Contact Bill Needelman, City of Portland Waterfront Coordinator, at wbn@ portlandmaine.gov or 874.8722 or Diane Davison, Executive Director Friends of the Eastern Promenade, at diane@easternpromenade.org or 831.4888 Or visit www.easternpromenade.org

Up Portland 04.16 On The Web At: www.upportland.com Page 21

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The Gossip Column

LOVE Downtown. LIVE Downtown www.portlandmecondo.com

By Britain & Sydney / The Up Portland Office Gossip Cats Some days, our pussies’ jobs are more exciting than others which is why Britain was about to have a snooze the other day. Thanks goodness we caught her with her mouth wide open. But who else did we catch this month doing things they’d just as soon we did not know about? Well, take a lady who rented an apartment to shall we say an unscrupulous and rude couple who decided that they not only could repaint her kitchen, but replace the tile, then run out on their 12-month lease after just five weeks. Oh, and they left her with an $800 bill for the paint and tile work they had done and never paid for.

What’s more? They had the kitchen painted blood red. Why that colour? “Easy,” they informed her “it’s the colour of meat and everyone knows that makes folks hungry!” If these cats were her they’d be suing for damages, but that’s another story... Speaking of stories, what IS it about Commercial Street which always has something interesting to offer? From lost folks to a lady conversing with workers at one of the fish firms trying to convince one of them to go home with her for something more than Whoopie Pie, we cats seem to see and hear it all down there.

It’s like Portland’s answer to Peyton Place!...

And finally, we cats wish a fond farewell to our friend Jess and her daughter Phoebe as the duo left their jobs at Optimal Self on Congress Street and headed west for new adventures. They will be missed! Meow!

ANDREW ROY Associate Broker

c: 207.649.1166 o: 207.619.7571 andrew@portsidereg.com portsiderealestategroup.com

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