Facetiming the gramdl<icis Chhanan chan choo

DEARAUNTYJI

I amthe dadiofthe mostbeautiful 2-year-old nanhipari. butI have a situationwithherthatI need your guidance with Becausewe have been inlockdown.we have notbeenableto visit herbecause we live7kmsaway Auntyji,everydaymyheartyearnsfor her Hermother(who isofAustralian heritage)does notlike Monalisausing the phone -becauseshe saysthere will betime fortechnologylater. However.the consequenceofthis isthat Monalisa does notliketalking onthe phone andso whenwe tryto call,she throwsthe phonedownand walksawayand insists onwatching Coca Cola onYouTube instead Ifshe gets hold ofthe phone,she insistson goingto YouTubeto watchBollywood videos - and this isanotherreason hermumdoes notwanther usingthe phone ButAuntyji,I amsosaddened that Monalisadoesnotwantto talkto us onthe phone I thinkhermother should make moreofanefforttoget Monalisato keep intouchwithus What ifshe forgetsus?Canyouplease tell me how to solvethissituation?

AUNTYJISAYS

Dodimaiyyadadimaiyya, moanjaao. Chodoyegussa. zarahuskedikhao

Whatkind ofold crone are youthat you are imposingyourexpectations onyourOIL and yourlittle nanhi pari?Childrenarefickle,and today. Monalisamightnotwanttotalktoyou onthe phone and prefers KartikAryan and KritiSanon's Coca Cola instead. Buttomorrow,she mightwantto have along conversationwithyou.

Butforyouto putthe blameonyour

OIL shows me you are aterrible dadi. Whatkind ofakalmuhithinks like this aboutthe motherofhergrandkids?

So here is mysolution.Ifyoureally want Monalisa's attention and youare competing withBollywood,then it's simple nah?Putonashinysari,and do adanceand sing CocaCola- or Cholikepeecheifthatisyourvintage -foryourlittle Gudiya, record itand send itto her. Simple.I meansurely, no humiliation istoo deepto sufferfor grand kids, nah?Monalisawill likely love yourperformance so muchthat she will notforgetyouanytime soon.

Problemsolved?

Dearauntyji

MyAustralianhusbandwhoisaverycool guyhasbeenbuyingfashiononlineand Auntyjihisrecentpurchaseshave mea littleflummoxed.So,like Isaid,Jamesis prettycooland rockandroll.Heworks inadvertisingandwearsblackand has agroovyhaircut.Well,heusedtohavea groovyhaircutbutbecauseofCOVIO he currentlyissportinga70sshaggymess Inanychase.Jamesboughtadesigner braceletforhimselfwithskullsonitand itlooked reallygood Thenhebought anotheroneinleatherwhichworkedwell. Thesearereallynicebraceletsmadeby AlexanderMcQueensoyou knowthatthey areprettygothicand cuttingedge Then theotherday,heboughtathirdone -and nowAuntyji.hewearsallthreeofthemlike some rockand rollgodand lopesaround the house hisbanglesjangling Auntyji eachtimeI hearhisbangles.I hearanold Bollywoodsonginmyhead. Thodichudiya pahenlo, ekghagrasilwalo Idon'teven rememberwhichfilmthissong isfrom.but thebanglesaredriving me insane Why mustmybeautifulhusbandsound like all mydesimamis.kakisand dadis?Whatto dowiththisharjayee. Auntyji whattodo?

Auntyjisays

Oh ho ho.Whatfun itmustbe to live inyour house.Butifthis isthe biggest problem inyourlife.I reallydon'tsee whatthe issue is here.Wouldn'tyou rather know atall timeswhere hubby is.justbythesound ofhis chudiyan?

So ifyouwanted to nip outside for aquickcigarette orto make coweyes withyourneighbour. atleastyou cando itsafe inthe knowledge that youwill hearJames coming a mile off. Isaythatyou have nothingto complain about- how luckyareyouto have such arockgod patidev! Now ifyour hubbystartswearing pura makeup andbites offthe heads oflive chickens, thenyou know he is going toofaras a rockstargod. Otherwisejustlethim be.Also.aBollywoodsong comesto mymind -the divine Sridevi(inLata M's voice)singing Chhanan chhan chudiyaankhanakgayidekh sahiba. Letthissong runthroughyourhead asyou hearyourhubbyjingling and janglingthroughthe house. and let thatsound then takeyourimagination toplaces onlyyou and your hubby should know about.