NRI, so what?

The Australia-returned phenomenon has lost its charm in India, and people aren’t even polite about it humour would soften him. impress them!”

BY SUNIL GUATAM

My friend was unhappy again. Just back from a trip to India, he looked neither excited nor content. I am not suggesting that excitement and contentment have anything to do with visiting India, but we know it is a culturally correct posture to maintain.

Having known him for over a decade in Australia, I know how much he used to enjoy going back home and would come back with stories of what they did and how everyone was thrilled to see them. This was a much planned trip after a long wait. But this time, he looked as if they refused him entry into the country and he had to spend four weeks pretending to be a baggage handler at the airport.

“Spent too much money?” I asked, hoping he would start talking.

“You know that is not a problem with me,” he retorted defensively.

“So what is it?”

“It’s just that it doesn’t feel great any more. You know, the whole thing about going to India from ‘overseas’.... wide eyed relatives, people loving your accent, loving your presents and loving you in the process....it’s all gone!”

“So it wasn’t like a Rajshri film this time? Laughter, singing, laughter, love, singing, singing?” I tried to cajole him, knowing how he relates everything to movies.

“Yes and no,” he said. “The folks were happy to see us but there was something missing.”

“What could that be? I think the only thing missing this time was the hair on your head,” I said, sure that

“The hearts... the hearts have changed, my friend,” he thumped his chest in true filmi style. “May be you are too shallow to understand.”

I kept quiet because by now he was sufficiently stirred up to do without my help.

“Earlier, after the initial hugs and kisses, we would all get together around our suitcases as we took out the presents for everyone. Each present was received with squeals of joy, gentle complaints of us spending too much money and kids rushing off to show their gifts to their friends.”

“And this time?”

“The response was muted. Apparently, there was nothing new in our presents. They were not ‘foreign’ enough for them. India has everything now, you know. They had a bigger collection of perfumes than us, better watches, more gold,” he explained.

“But at least the kids would have loved the toys you took for them. I am sure they ran off with them,” I offered helpfully.

“Hah! The nephew hid his present under the bed because his friends were coming over and he didn’t want to be embarrassed. The niece had one look at her present and said, ‘But it is made in China. I thought you came from Australia!’”

“What about the seniors?” I said, still hopeful.

“They were more held back. But they did hint that they understood how expensive things are in Sydney. There were nods of understanding, but no eyes lit up in the whole ‘guess what we got for you from Australia’ episode,” he replied.

“Oh,” I tried to sympathize, “why didn’t you try taking them out shopping? You could spend like a maniac and

“Shopping? Do you know how expensive things are now?” he retorted. “You can spend ten thousand rupees and let a newborn carry all the shopping! And impress who? Have you seen how the Indians spend these days? They eat momos for a thousand rupees everyday. One lakh is loose change now. I know someone who pays 1.25 lakh rupees a month on rent! VIP tickets at the IPL are worth Rs 20,000 each and they are the first to be sold out! I’ll be a maniac if I try to impress them by spending. In fact, I told one retailer that we were from Sydney and he said: Oh ok, I’ll make it cheaper for you, then.”

“But a few pictures of Australia should have worked. Didn’t you take your pictures of your trips to the Uluru, Gold Coast and Tassie? After all these are exotic locations not found in India,” I insisted, trying for all it was worth.

“My friend, I am sure you know that airports are found in India! Do these guys travel or what? You take out one picture of Australia and they show you 10 from 5 destinations in Europe. Apparently, big companies regularly send their employees overseas as part of their package,” he replied despairingly.

“So there is nothing to feel good about the entire trip from a ‘show-off’ point of view? This was Delhi, weren’t you supposed to go to Mumbai as well? How did that go?”

“Oh the Mumbai part was great! We decided not to go shopping to avoid embarrassment. Didn’t exchange any holiday pictures. And yes, people loved our gifts too,” he said with a weak smile.

“How come?” I was truly curious.

“Because we bought all the Mumbai gifts from Delhi.”