Lesson 2: Changes in boys and girls: puberty and gender awareness (gender conception) (3 hours

1.2 Lesson 2: Changes in boys and girls: puberty and gender awareness (gender conception) (3 hours)

1.2.1 Physical and emotional changes

Adolescence is marked by emotional and physical changes. These changes play an important role in the forming of your self-image and self-knowledge. Sexuality is the way you see yourselves as boys and girls. It is not the same as sex.

Sexuality is about the following aspects: 1. How we see ourselves and how we feel and think about our bodies. It follows on with Lesson 1 where we told you how important self-respect is. You can only respect your own body if you see it in a positive light. You may have freckles or big ears and don’t like them. It is important to look past these things and recognise all your positive aspects, for example your beautiful eyes. You will then respect others easier if you have self-respect and self-love. 2. Puberty causes us to think otherwise about the opposite sex. We get sexual feelings and thoughts and fall in love easily. 3. The awareness of our sexuality influences how we will act and even has an influence on your clothing and choice of music! 4. Sexuality is also about our values and norms regarding love and the friendships we have. 5. It also directs us to whom we are attracted to.

Puberty therefore brings all these changes and makes us intensely aware of the different sexes. There are various factors that can influence your sexuality.

1. Your parents/family This forms the basis of your sexuality. It is here where you learn what roles the different sexes play in the family and society. Your parents form your values and norms regarding sexuality.

2. Your friends and peers Your friends don’t always have the same view about sex as your parents and this can sometimes lead to a conflict in your value system. This can make you feel confused.

3. Your culture and race group Certain cultures and races have certain prescriptions regarding sexuality and the different genders’ acts. The prescriptions can influence your sexuality in a huge way. In certain cultures boys and girls may not be left alone at all. They are even divided during social functions.

4. Your religion Your religion has some prescriptions and can also have prescriptions regarding your sexuality. For example, Christianity is against any sexual relations before marriage.

DEFINE

5. 1.

Sexuality: The way we see ourselves as boys and girls. Puberty: The phase from about 13 years when the pituatary gland is excited in the body and that causes physical and emotional changes. Homosexual: They are people attracted to people of the same sex. Heterosexual: They are people who are attracted to the opposite sex.

1.2.2 Understanding of the changes and how they influence relationships

The physical and emotional changes in your body is not only limited to yourself. They also happen to your friends and therefore you should have understanding for them as well. It is not only you who sometimes feel good and suddenly feel sad or upset. Your friends also go through that. You should have an understanding and compassion for that.

You can therefore now see how all the changes can influence or change your relationships with friends. Any two people handle puberty differently. It can happen that you lose some of your friends or gain others.

The changes in your body and emotions also change the relationship you have with yourself. You may not always understand why you react or act in certain ways. You must have lots of patience with yourself and understand that these changes occur to bring you to adulthood.

If you understand your own sexuality and are aware of the changing emotions inside yourself, you will also understand your parents’ actions. It can contribute to a positive and healthy relationship where your parents will also respect you.

CORE CONTENT

The core content of the lesson is about the process of puberty and how it contributes towards a gender identity.

Why is it important to learn about puberty and sexuality?

It is important to learn about sexuality so that you can understand yourself and the friends around you. It gives you self-confidence if you know what is happening to your body and it helps you to better understand your feelings. You then know that you are not going

through it alone. It helps you to build loving and positive relationships with the people closest to you.

If you understand your own sexuality it is easier to set values and norms for yourself and to respect yourself. You don’t always have to agree with your friends’ opinion regarding sex. You must also feel comfortable to say “no” to anything that doesn’t agree with your value system.

It makes you aware of the problem of sexual abuse and you can recognise situations which you don’t feel comfortable with. We learn that there are people that have other sexual values and inclinations than ourselves.

Therefore, the way in which you show understanding towards others, whether they be friends, will influence your relationships directly. If you support your friends positively you will build a strong relationship with them.

Be aware not to use a bad mood to hurt other people!

1.2.3 Respect for own and others’ bodily changes and emotions and appreciation and acceptance of self and others

During puberty each one of us develop sexual feelings. It is a normal process. Sexuality should however be handled responsibly and we must learn how. It is also normal that not everyone will have the same type of sexuality.

People’s sexuality is influenced by a variety of factors, as discussed in 1.2.1. A lot of young people who don’t have good role models in their life sometimes get information in the wrong places. They can be advertisements, TV or friends. These sources don’t always convey the right message regarding sexuality.

The norm of sexuality is that a person will be attracted to the opposite sex, in other words heterosexual or ‘straight’. However, there are people who are attracted to people of the same sex and we call them homosexual.

It occurs much more in today’s society. Even if we don’t agree in all cases it is important to respect other people’s differences.

We must firstly appreciate and accept ourselves. After that we must accept that people will sometimes be different from ourselves and therefore also appreciate them for the persons they are.