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IDAHO

FREE

OCTOBER 2016

MAGAZINE Want kids to love you? Set boundaries for them

Idaho IceWorld Warm up to ice skating

Halloween games

Keeping interest piqued

Social anxiety Is your teen affected?

Idaho carousels Swirling with history Andrew Micklus and his daughters, Kaitlyn and Alissa, of Meridian hike the Blue Lake Trail near Cascade Want your child’s photo on next month’s cover?

Check inside for details!


IDAHO

Contents October 2016

MAGAZINE

Features Columns IceWorld:

Skate clubs and Ice Show

4 22 Manic Mothering: Exchange student blues

6

Irene’s Insights: Fall tablescapes

Volume 4, Number 10 Publisher Sterling Media Ltd. Editor Gaye Bunderson gayeb@sterlingmedialtd.com 208-639-8301 Sales & Marketing Kimberly McMullen kim.bcliving@gmail.com 208-854-8345

Boundaries:

8

Social anxiety:

9

Set and enforce them Masked as shyness

Halloween & Harvest Events:

14

Graphic Design Glen Bruderer

19 moMENts:

Making a move

In Each Edition 3

Halloween games: 16 Maximize interest

Idaho carousels: Spinning with history

20

10-15

Family Events Calendar: Family friendly activities & events for October & early November!

Departments Crafts on a Dime: Staining wood

Editor’s Intro Eat together; here’s why

18

 October 2016 | Idaho Family Magazine

Contributors Bobbie Berendson, Patrick Hempfing, Beth Markley, Sandy Spurgeon McDaniel, Robert Rhodes, Samantha Stillman, Irene Woodworth & Joe Zentner

Distribution Specialists Idaho Distribution Services

Idaho Family Magazine, published monthly by Sterling Media Ltd., is committed to providing readers with informative and entertaining information to help them in maintaining healthy families and positive lifestyles. It is distributed throughout the valley as a free publication. Idaho Family Magazine does not assume responsibility for statements or opinions expressed by editorial contributors or advertisers. The acceptance of advertising does not constitute an endorsement of the products, services or information. Idaho Family Magazine does not knowingly present any product or service which is fraudulent or misleading in nature. No portion of this magazine may be reproduced without express written consent of the publisher. Reader correspondence and editorial submissions are welcome. Idaho Family Magazine reserves the right to edit or reject all materials submitted. All rights reserved. Copyright 2016 by Sterling Media Ltd.

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EDITOR’S Intro

Another good reason to eat together

I

t’s a topic that’s been well-covered — eating together as a family. However, new research indicates that shared meals have another highly valuable component. They can impact the mental health of children and adolescents. In August, newly released guidelines from the American Academy of Pediatrics — backed by research — indicated that when parents and children gather around the table on a regular basis to eat together, it decreases the risk of eating disorders in teens. While the idea of a warm family gathering sounds in and off itself like a solid foundation for a sense of well-being, there’s a bit more to it than that. The website www.sciencedaily.com offers evidence-based strategies for combating the eating disorders that plague thousands of U.S. teens, especially girls. In a story supported by data from the Stanford University Medical Center, five primary recommendations are given to help teens avoid the serious consequences of eating disorders, as follows: “Three recommendations focus on behaviors to avoid: Parents and doctors should not encourage dieting; should avoid ‘weight talk,’ such as commenting on their own weight or their child’s weight; and should never tease teens about their weight. Two recommendations focus on behaviors to promote: Families should eat regular meals together, and parents should help their children develop a healthy body image by encouraging them to eat a balanced diet and to exercise for fitness, not weight loss.” While most of these recommendations sound like no-brainers, this study marks the first time meals together have been highly encouraged as a way to stave off anorexia, bulimia and binge eating. And here’s the crux of the recommendation: it’s about parents modeling good habits. You may be thinking, “As if I don’t have enough to worry about as a parent. Now I have to eat right and exercise regularly or my kid could become an eating disorder statistic.” First, there are no absolute guarantees about anything. No one can fully predict who will and who won’t fall victim to the temptation to diet to the point of unhealthy extremes. Second, no one expects you, as a parent, to be perfect. In fact, it may well be the idea of perfection itself that pushes people into the realm of dangerous behaviors. The idea is for you to do your best without making it an obsession, and let your children see that you are doing your best…without making it an obsession. Obsession is an adverse motivator. These recommendations apply to both mothers and fathers, so just remind yourselves that they are based on research undertaken by people who see the dramatic effects of eating disorders fre-

quently in their practices. The article also makes note of the fact that dieting itself is not a healthy activity for young, developing bodies. It states: “Teens who diet in ninth grade are three times more likely than their peers to be overweight in 12th grade. And calorie-counting diets can deprive teenagers of the energy they need.” Don’t lose sight of the good news here: it’s valuable to eat together and enjoy one another’s company. Make mealtime the least stressful part of the day, a great time to relax as a family. Just don’t pig out on bad food that will make everyone feel groggy (and guilty) afterwards. There are a couple more ways moms and dads can work together for the benefit of their families. Both of them need to be aware of what is placed on the table and whether or not it serves as a source of good health. It shouldn’t just be Mom’s responsibility. Also, both parents can play a part in keeping dinner table conversation upbeat and positive, or a place where, when bad things happen in life, people support one another. Perhaps even eating out once a month could be an opportunity for family together time, as long as portions are reasonable and food is nutritious. “Pediatricians can encourage families to have family meals as often as possible. It doesn’t have to be every night,” Neville Golden, MD, professor of pediatrics at the Stanford University School of Medicine and a lead author of the guidelines, said in the article. When you realize what’s at stake, it’s a no-brainer. (To see the full article, go to https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2016/08/160822083404.htm.)

A new face at Idaho Family

Idaho Family Magazine has a new sales and marketing director, Kimberly McMullen. She replaces Melva Bade, who is retiring. This marks Melva’s last edition. Kimberly was raised in Idaho and has resided in Boise for 15 years. As an Idaho native, she has a deep appreciation for the state’s wilderness areas. From hiking to camping, she is always eager for her next adventure in the mountains. She is also a loyal Boise State football fan and loves going to the home games. Kimberly is proud of her Idaho roots and is excited to be a part of Idaho Family Magazine, where she is helping us connect with our communities through her new position. “As a mother,” she said, “I have a strong sense of family, and I’m enjoying getting to know our proud supporters who believe in the heart of our mission to promote the Idaho family.” See Kimberly’s contact information on our contents page. n — Gaye Bunderson, editor ID A H O

FREE

OCTOBER 2016

Children’s Sports Photos Wanted

Want kI dS to lovE yo

Set bounda ries

Idaho Family Magazine would love to put your child on our cover. We are currently looking for photos of children engaged in sports. All photos should be high quality, sharp and clear, and high resolution of around 300 dpi. Color photos are preferred, and all photos need to be vertical, not horizontal. Please identify the children in the photos. Send the photographs to gayeb@sterlingmedialtd.com.

On the Cover:

halloW

gamES

Keeping

u?

for them

EEn

MAGAZ

INE

Idaho IceWorld

Warm up to ice ska ting

interest piqu ed

SocIal anxiety

Is your teen affected?

Idaho carousel s

Swirling

Andrew Micklus and his daughters, Kaitlyn and Alissa, of Meridian hike the Blue Lake Trail near Cascade

with histo ry

Andrew Mick lus and his daughter Meridian hike the Blue s, Alissa and Kait lyn, of Lake Trail Want your near Casc child’s photo ade on next month’s cover ?

Check inside

www.idahofamilymagazine.com

for details!

Idaho Family Magazine | October 2016 


Idaho IceWorld

Where people warm up to ice skating By Gaye Bunderson

B

10-2016

ecause it takes place on ice, skating is frequently seen as a strictly winter sport. But in fact, it’s a year-round activity, and Idaho IceWorld in Boise keeps the cool in ice skating in more ways than one. Jackie Woodland, recreation specialist at IceWorld, said the science behind keeping the rinks frozen and smooth for skating draws valley schoolchildren throughout the year to see the detailed technology. Equipment includes a large machine known as a Zamboni that the students get a peak at during their field trips. IceWorld also helps establish ice skating as a cool thing to do with its many programs that draw large numbers of valley youngsters and adults. One of those programs, for instance, is the Boise Figure Skating Club. Trisha Jernigan, Boise Figure Skating Club board president, got her daughter Ashley involved in figure skating through a Mommy & Me program at IceWorld. Now 12, Ashley is an active figure skater who competes with other local girls for trophies. During a competition August 23-24 in Sun Valley, Ashley won first place in Interpretive skating. In that category, contestants make up a routine “on the fly,” said Trisha, who explained that competitive skating helped her once-shy daughter become more self-confident. “It’s great for everybody,” Trisha said. “It’s helped her be more outgoing.” There are 90 members in the Boise Figure Skating Club; that figure includes coaches, college members, board members, and all the youngsters. Idaho IceWorld, which is run by the Boise Parks & Recreation Department, adheres to the standards of U.S. Figure Skating and USA Hockey, following their curriculums and instructor guidelines. While Trisha said there are a few boys in the figure skating club, Jackie stated girls’ hockey is “growing by leaps and bounds.” IceWorld already has one full girls’ team. Jackie started out as a board member for the skating club and was not initially part of the paid staff at IceWorld. But when the

Special Olympics were held in Boise in 2009, organizers called Idaho IceWorld to help locate a venue for figure skating; Jackie was called on to participate as venue director, leading to her current job as IceWorld’s recreation specialist. The rink used by the Idaho Steelheads in CenturyLink Arena became the ice skating venue for the Olympians — each of whom has a special need — and while working with the athletes, Jackie became an enthusiast for adaptive sports. “This was my first experience with people with special needs who want to skate. It either sucks you in or turns you off. I got sucked in,” she said. She wanted badly to bring adaptive skating to IceWorld. Boise Parks & Rec offers an adaptive recreation program called AdVenture, overseen by Emily Kovarik. In 2014, working in partnership with Emily, Jackie wrote a grant proposal in hopes of obtaining funding for adaptive skating at IceWorld through the Prudential Foundation. She won a grant in the amount of $15,000 in January of 2015 and, with the funds, bought: • Ice sleds, which may be used for people with disabilities — including people in wheelchairs — who are unable to stand on skates • Adult-sized walkers, so that special needs people of all ages may get out on the ice in a pair of skates (with plenty of supervision, for safety) • Helmets and other basic equipment No new staff was required for the adaptive program. “My staff is amazing,” Jackie said. “Working with adaptive skaters is not that much different — they work with the goals and abilities of the skaters.” She praised staff for being able to work with everyone to teach them to skate, and to encourage them. Last spring, they worked with 32 adaptive skaters of all ages and abilities. William Smoke, who runs IceWorld’s Learn to Play Hockey program for kids ages 4-16 and also assists with the high school hockey program, said: “We have special needs kids in both our hockey side and our figure skating side. This is all new ground for IceWorld, but the staff is committed.”

 October 2016 | Idaho Family Magazine

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The Boise Figure Skating Club and IceWorld’s adaptive skating program come together for IceWorld’s annual Ice Show in December. “The club kids are one-on-one helpers to the adaptive kids,” Trisha said. “They’re passionate about their sport and sharing their skills with others. The No. 1 priority of IceWorld is to have fun,” Jackie said. Ice skating instructor Tara La Ferriere choreographs and produces the annual Ice Show and is planning for a “flood of colors” during this year’s event December 10. The theme is Kaleidoscope on Ice. Tickets go on sale starting November 1; there are two shows — one at 3 and another at 6 and, according to Jackie, both shows sell out every year. Anyone interested in attending may purchase a ticket at the Information Desk at IceWorld, Ashley Jernigan, 12, is a member of the Boise Figure Skating Club at Idaho IceWorld. She is shown 7072 S. Eisenman Rd. here in a skating competition. (Photo provided by Trisha Jernigan) Please note, all the programs at Idaho IceWorld are for people of all ages, including the public as well. Because IceWorld is the only indoor rink in its Learn to Skate and Learn to Play Hockey the valley for use by the public at all times throughout the year, programs. The Boise Figure Skating Club welcomes everyone people who wish to skate, or learn to skate, travel from Meridas well. Check out the Boise Parks and Recreation fall activity ian, Nampa, Caldwell, Star, Eagle and other nearby communiguide or go to idahoiceworld.com. ties. Also, anyone from throughout the valley may participate in Like the Ice Show and other events, children, parents, and any IceWorld program. There is a small outdoor ice skating rink used during winter months at The Village in Meridian, and even grandparents participate. “It’s an all-family activity,” Jackie said. n CenturyLink Arena has occasionally hosted free skate days for

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Idaho Family Magazine | October 2016 


Irene’s Insights

Take advantage of fall, create a tablescape each year. Unlike the flowers of spring and summer that fade pretty quickly in a vase, nature’s bounty in the autumn months is a little harhat do you do to get ready for dier. Pumpkins, gourds, acorns, fall mums and this busy time of year? Do you dry sticks can last for many days inside. It’s pick out a favorite pumpkin, try nice to set up a display with them, knowing a new pumpkin recipe, drink that you’ll be able to enjoy it for more than a hot apple cider, go to a football game, tailgate, day or two. go through a corn maze, go apple picking, bake If you need a table runner and you do not a pie, or take a drive to see the beautiful fall folihave one, then find a piece of material, a side age in your city? What about decorating for fall? panel of textured fabric or even a blouse with Perhaps you put a fall wreath on your front door a fall pattern you can use to add some layerand plant some mums in your garden beds. Don’t ing to your tablescapes. Or you may use a stop there. straw runner or burlap to add some different One of my favorite things is creating tablestype of texture to your base as you do your capes throughout our home. (Tablescapes are an Irene Woodworth layering. artistic arrangement of articles on a table.) I first There are all kinds of containers you can use for your disstart with the outside door and add a seasonal wreath that can be changed from year to year. I go to my garage and take down plays, such as hurricane lamps, colored glass or vintage type of dishes of silver, pewter, copper pots or bowls. You may display my fall décor bins of fruit, fall-colored leaves, floral urns and some gourds, Indian corn and leaves. You may make a centercontainers, candles and fabric that will match the décor. I also piece with colorful mums inside it. I recently saw Indian corn consider any table linens, tablecloths, table runners, placemats tied up around a round glass container with a candle on it. It and matching cloth napkins that will match this décor as we was tied with a jute string that added to that rustic and natural change them out to add the warmth of this colorful season. type of décor. You can also hollow out a pumpkin and put a Then I go inside and add the fall touches on our entry room bowl inside to do a colorful floral centerpiece that can add an desk that welcomes our guests to our home. Then I go room unexpected type of décor to your table. by room and decide what I would like to do on our dining and Nuts, seeds and beans in all colors are wonderful additions kitchen tables, accent shelves or our fireplace mantle. I like to to use, too. You can even find some colored leaves as you take change things out a bit and make it a little different seasonally a walk in your neighborhood. Also, for fun you can go and pick some natural beauty that can add wonderful décor to your displays, such as leaves, sticks or acorns. If you would like to add a touch of glamour to your décor, you may want to combine various metals or perhaps spray paint some of your pumpkins or sticks in various metallic colors to add a little “bling” to your tablescapes. As the days get shorter, light is reflected beautifully using some candles in metallic colors of bronze, copper, silver and gold. I challenge you to do something different to use in a tablescape in your home this year. Last year, I found some fun metal pumpkin and smaller ceramic pumpkins that were in a dotted Natural fall items may be used to decorate a home with beautiful colors. Combine nature’s bounty with manmade decorations for black and white pattern a stunning combination called a tablescape. Shown in this photo is a Thanksgiving tablescape created by Irene Woodworth, but at my local thrift store. tablescapes may be used in a variety of settings. (Photo provided by Irene Woodworth) By Irene Woodworth

W

 October 2016 | Idaho Family Magazine

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Since I use a lot of black and white in our home and have a table runner and napkins that are black with white polka dots, it went really well on my entry desk in our foyer. I placed a “Celebrate” metal sign on the wall between the top of the desk and the wall mirror above it. Candles in a variety of sizes and colors are also wonderful additions. If you purchase any with fragrance, try to have a light scent to them. You may also purchase battery-operated lighted candles that work just as well. It is fun to place them in hurricane lamps and surround your candle with nuts or seeds. This will also add the fall colors and textures of the season. An attractive centerpiece may be created using You can choose any fall color of gold, Indian corn tied up around a tall candleholder. orange, red, purple and green along with neutrals. The variety of items to use in your (Photo by Shelterness) tablescapes this year can be unique in a variety of decorating styles of vintage, classic, modern, traditional or retro. I hope this inspires you to do something different. Go ahead and make your tablescapes visually interesting and colorful! n Irene Woodworth is known as “Idaho’s Color Lady” and is founder and CEO of Redesign Boise. She is a national redesign award winner, motivational speaker, certified redesigner and color consultant, and instructor on redesign and color. She has a degree in education and interior design. She has taught various decorating and color classes throughout the country. She may be reached at Irene@ RedesignBoise.com. For more information, visit RedesignBoise.com.

Flu season is here. Has your child received a flu shot? As you are aware, we are entering the flu season, which typically runs from fall to early spring in the US. The CDC is recommending that everyone over six months of age receive the flu vaccine for protection. Our practice is offering the Evolve™ clinical research study for children ages six months (6) to fifty nine months (59) of age that have not received their annual flu shot. If you have children between the ages of 6 months to 4 years and 11 months, that qualify to participate, they will receive: • Study related medical exams • An Investigational flu vaccine. • Up to three (3) office visits. • Possible compensation for time and travel related to the study. To determine if your child may be eligible to participate, please contact Advanced Clinical Research at www.acridaho.com or call 208-955-9030.

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Idaho Family Magazine | October 2016 


They’ll love you for it

Why children need boundaries, consequences many times when I’ve worked with teenagers in trouble: “They don’t love me enough or they would stop me!” To create boundaries, a parent must also have boundaries. Disrespectful talk from children is not allowed. rom the time children are born Whining to get their way won’t work. “I’m thirsty!” they begin to figure out that they doesn’t involve you; don’t respond until the child says, are separate from their parents and “I’m thirsty, will you get me a drink of water, please?” have this undefinable thing called The child needs to learn to ask for what he/she wants. power. It’s as if a child wakes up one morning Hitting is not appropriate. Meltdowns will not be with a laser sword and then begins to figure out rewarded. A certain level of noise is okay and then it’s how to use it: cries to get attention, hits, throws too much. “Take it outside, please!” (Or separate the things, has temper tantrums, is defiant, not kind, children for a calm-down period.) I like the words “two aggressive and is difficult to handle in every choices” as it tells the child you are done negotiating: crossroad. Two choices: calm down or be separated. Two choices: The difficult child is asking a question: “Is this talk to me in a different tone of voice or try again in 10 how I use power? Is it okay to hit my sister? Is minutes. (This works especially well if the child wants it okay to melt down in the store? Is it okay to Sandy Spurgeon something.) Two choices: get into the car or a penny goes whine and never talk? Is it okay to come out 10 McDaniel in your jar. times when put to bed? Is it okay to be unkind?” My discipline system includes the Minute Drill, used with children What children need is feedback and consequences to influence their choices. The parent needs to create the boundaries: we are kind, 3 and up. The only rule you need is, “We are kind to each other.” For hitting, disrespect or unkindness a penny automatically goes in regular bedtimes are necessary, doing chores are a part of living in our home (never mind a necessary training for adulthood!), appropri- a jar with the child’s name on it. To get a child to mind you (go to ate behavior is expected in other people’s homes, including grandpar- bed, stay in bed, come in from outside, pick up your toys, give me the iPad, turn off the TV, get out of bed in the morning, etc.), you give ents’. What is and is not allowed in terms of behavior and attitude the child a minute to change his/her mind by saying, “You are on needs to be clearly defined. Boundaries need to be consistently enforced. A child without boundaries does not feel loved. I’ve heard this the Minute Drill. You have one minute to do what I asked or a penny goes into your jar.” Pennies in a jar? Who cares? They care because each penny represents 15 minutes off of something fun they were going to do that day. For instance: 1. “Your favorite TV show is starting? Oh, there’s a penny in the jar, so you will miss the first 15 minutes of it. If you melt down, I will put a penny in the jar for each minute you scream and cry.” 2. “Your friend is here to play outside? Great! Oh, you have a penny in the jar, so you need to sit on the front porch until you hear the timer, then you can go play.” My research for developing the Minute Drill (originally for Asperger’s-challenged children) indicated that kids don’t care if you take whole things away, but it annoys the snot out of them to have their life interrupted with a 15-minute consequence. Parents who come to me for private parent coaching are amazed when my response to, “How long will training our children take?” is “Two to four days.” You will be astonished to see how much children don’t want a penny, and yet they don’t resent them. In my book, “Don’t Feed the Dragon” (parentingsos.com), all the Minute Drill details are mapped out for the reader. Children without boundaries become a nightmare to manage. They lose every fundamental social skill that allows them to function successfully in relationships. Many of them become a problem to society. I think everyone wants to make the world a better place. Teaching your children to make better choices and to be responsible for their choices is one way to achieve that — and they will thank you with their lives. n By Sandy Spurgeon McDaniel

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 October 2016 | Idaho Family Magazine

For 54 years, Sandy McDaniel has been an international speaker and recognized authority on families/children. Author of five books, columnist, founder of parentingsos.com, Sandy is a resident of Meridian and loves spending time with her three Idaho grandchicks. Semi-retired, she speaks to schools, churches, MOPS groups and provides parent coaching sessions in person and on the phone.

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Recognize the signs

Is your teen just shy…or socially anxious?

I

t is hard to imagine an otherwise bright and competent teen unable to make a hair appointment over the phone. Or a teen dodging and weaving in order to avoid ordering a meal in public. Or a teen worrying excessively about doing or saying something “stupid.” Well, before your exasperation as a parent reaches a boiling point, please consider that there is no one in the world who would like to master the above tasks more than your teen. And yet, their struggles continue, and in fact, seem to worsen with age. Often, children suffering from this condition are described as shy and most parents expect shyness to decline with time. But what we are describing here is not shyness, it is social anxiety. Before we get ahead of ourselves though, let’s first define social anxiety. It is a condition characterized by extreme fear of meeting new people or embarrassing oneself in public. And whereas shyness does often decline with age, social anxiety often worsens. Some call it the “silent disorder” because it can go unnoticed in children for years. Most of these children are compliant at home and cause few problems at school. They do not share their anxiety with others and they cope by avoiding the situations that trigger their anxiety. But social anxiety can in fact be crippling. Here are some symptoms to be alert to if you have concerns about your child: • Is your child uncomfortable speaking to teachers or peers? • Does your child avoid participating in new activities? • Does your child stay at home alone on weekends rather than being with friends? • Does your child expect things to go bad when they are around their peers? • Does your child worry about saying something stupid when speaking with others? • Does your child express negative thoughts about themselves? • Does your child appear to suffer in silence and also seem sad/depressed? If as a parent you answered “yes” to many of the above symptoms, here are some some strategies you can use to help your teen tackle social anxiety. First, help your child by giving the symptoms a name — anxiety — and then explain that millions of other people also suffer from anxiety. It is a relief for them to recognize that they are not alone and that you understand and are not disappointed in them. This also opens a path to communication with you, which is important since teens are reluctant to either burden the parent with their troubles, or embarrassed to share their feelings with anyone. Remember, they typically suffer in silence. Second, join your teen in the process of learning more about social anxiety. Two antidotes for anxiety are information and control. Therefore you will want to learn as much as you can about the subject, including some of the strategies your teen can use to keep it at bay. Sometimes this is a difficult process for all parties as the parent’s sense of urgency results in impatience. And anxiety is not a condition which responds well to urgency. If your child has a fear of water, you probably would not throw him/her into the deep end! So patience is the key

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here and letting children lead the way whenever possible provides that sense of control they covet. Lastly, once you begin to examine some of the strategies your teen can rely on to combat the way they feel, a useful plan of attack can be developed. The tools you choose will increase your child’s ability to cope and tolerate the anxiety, and tolerance is indeed the objective. “Eliminating” the anxiety altogether may be the long-term goal but not the initial focus. Small steps forward will increase confidence levels and leave the teen feeling a sense of optimism. While an increase in knowledge and the use of tools can be effective, sometimes it is not enough. Severe cases of anxiety will probably require that you seek professional help. The first step is usually through counseling. A counselor can help educate and guide the child through the process of managing the anxiety. Cognitive therapy focusing on destructive thoughts, assertiveness training to identify and express needs, relaxation training to address the physical symptoms of anxiety and imagined or real-life exposure to the triggers are all strategies that are likely to be helpful. Sometimes, however, even this is not enough. In those cases the teen may benefit from a consultation with the family doctor or other medical professional. Adolescents typically shy away from medications and parents are reluctant to medicate their children. But in severe cases where the teen is suffering, careful and thoughtful use of medication can be invaluable. Social anxiety does not have to be a lifetime sentence. Identifying the problem correctly, engaging the teen in the treatment process and forming a partnership with your child will bring noticeable results. Then, let time and maturity work their magic. n Robert Rhodes has a master of social work from the University of California, Berkeley. He obtained his license as a clinical social worker in 1989. Since then he has worked in multiple settings with children and adolescents. He has been in private practice for the past 16 years. He may be reached at rrhodes.lcsw@gmail.com, (208) 900-8500, or boiseteencounseling.com.

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Idaho Family Magazine | October 2016 


IDAHO

MAGAZINE

Skiing Idaho

CALENDAR

Ski-free “Passport Programs” and other snow sport discounts are being offered for winter 2016-17 by ski associations from New England to the Rockies to the Northwest. Complementing these savings will be the 9th annual “Learn to Ski and Snowboard Month” in January 2017 and the annual “Bring a Friend Challenge,” which runs nationally from early December through February 28, 2017. Also, on Friday, January 6, 2017, there will be an attempt to set the first Guinness World Record for the largest multivenue ski and the largest multi-venue snowboard lessons ever taught at ski areas across North America; participating venues will be listed by early December at learntoskiandsnowboard.org. Idaho is among the states that will be participating in the “Passport Programs” and student discount offers for winter 2016-17. In Idaho, the “5th and 6th Grade Ski Free Passport” program is honored at about 20 ski areas, with most offering 3 free full-day lift tickets for 5th Grade Passports and 2 full-day lift tickets for 6th Grade Passports. There is a one-time $15 processing fee due at the time of application; and at Sun Valley, Dollar Mountain honors passports but will charge an additional $20 to ski Bald Mountain (Baldy). Go to http://www.skiidaho.us/programs/passport. Check the website of your favorite ski resort in the state for more information.

Nampa Civic Center 2016-2017 Performing Arts Series

Season tickets are now on sale for the upcoming season of great performances at the Nampa Civic Center. Performances include humorist Patrick McManus (October 14), the famed Moscow Ballet (November 8), Hotel California (based on music by The Eagles), American Idol winner Taylor Hicks, and more. For a complete listing of shows, or to purchase tickets, go to nampaciviccenter.com or call 468-5555.

BSU Game Day Fun Pass at Pinz

Watch every Bronco football game on 10 big screens at Pinz in Meridian while kids get a good deal on fun, and families get specials on pizzas. For more information, go to pinzbowlingidaho.com.

Reading at the Refuge First and third Monday

Preschoolers, kindergartners and their families are invited to Reading at the Refuge every first and third Monday, with the exception of federal holidays, at 10 a.m. and repeating at 2 p.m. at the Deer Flat Wildlife Refuge Visitor Center near Lake Lowell in Nampa. There will be a wildlife-related story, craft-making, and exploring the Visitor Center and trails at the refuge. For more information, go to fws.gov/deerflat, email deerflat@fws.gov or call 467-9278.

10 October 2016 | Idaho Family Magazine

Kindermusik classes Mondays

Kindermusik at Dunkley Music is enrolling students ages 0-7 for music classes. Attend a free preview class and experience the delight of making music together while opening doors to creativity, exploration, friendship and joy in learning. Register for the preview class at dunkleymusic. kindermusik.com, or by calling the store at 342-5549 and asking for Jane. Classes are available at 10 a.m. Mondays. Dunkley Music is located at 3410 N. Eagle Rd., Ste. 150, in Meridian.

20th Annual Trailing of the Sheep Festival October 5-9

This festival includes the “sheep parade,” as well as a folk-life fair, sheepherders ball, workshops, exhibits, lamb feast, barbecue and more. It starts at 9 a.m. each day from October 5 to October 9 at various venues in Hailey, Ketchum and Sun Valley. Go to trailingofthesheep.org.

Dia de los Muertos Workshops Various dates

Nampa Public Library will hold workshops, as well as a parade and celebration, throughout October to mark Dia de los Muertos (Day of the Dead). Kicking off with the history of Dia de los Muertos on October 5, other events include: Family Workshops, 11 a.m. to 3 p.m., Saturday, October 8; Sacred Space, 5 to 6:30 p.m., Wednesday, October 12; Milagros, 5 to 6:30 p.m., Wednesday, October 19; Mask Making, 5 to 6:30 p.m., Wednesday, October 26; Parade in the Library Plaza, 1 to 2 p.m. Saturday, October 29; and a Celebration, 2 to 6 p.m., Nampa Elks Lodge, also on October 29. Go to nampalibrary.org.

Storytimes at Nampa Public Library Various dates

Nampa Public Library holds storytimes for youngsters as follows: Preschool Storytime – 10:15 to 11 a.m. Wednesdays, October 12, 19 and 26, and Fridays, October 7, 14, 21 and 28; Baby/Toddler Storytime – 10 a.m. to 11 a.m. Thursdays, October 13, 20 and 27; Right on Target – 10:30 to noon, Saturday, October 15; PreTween STEAM Storytime (ages 5-7) – 4 to 5 p.m. Monday, October 17; and Sensory Storytime – 3:45 to 4:30 p.m., Monday, October 24. Go to nampalibrary.org.

Movie Matinee for All Ages October 7

The movie “Coraline” will be shown from 4:15 to 6 p.m. Friday, October 7, in the meeting room at Eagle Public Library. All are welcome. (The library holds movies and other family-friendly events throughout the month. Go to eaglepubliclibrary.org.)

StarLab (all ages) October 7

Take the family to the Cherry Lane branch of the Meridian library and explore the wonders of the night sky by stepping into the StarLab, an inflatable planetarium, from 6 to 7:30 p.m. Friday, October 7. Participate in hands-on and kinesthetic activities that explore astronomy.

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of Events

Month of October & Early November Please send family-related calendar items to gayeb@sterlingmedialtd.com.

The program will also be held from 10:30 to 11:30 a.m. Saturday, October 8. Go to mld.org.

Idaho Health & Fitness Fair

Foothills Star Party

The 24th Annual Idaho Health & Fitness Fair will be held from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Saturday, October 8, and from 11 a.m. to 4 p.m. Sunday, October 9, at Expo Idaho, 5610 Glenwood in Boise. The Health Fair welcomes all ages to the free, fun-filled and educational event that features the latest trends on nutrition, weight loss, skin care, senior services and more.

The Jim Hall Foothills Learning Center at 3188 Sunset Peak Rd. in Boise holds free, family-oriented programs throughout the year on the second Saturday of every month from 10 a.m. to 1 p.m. No need for reservations; everyone is welcome. The center will hold its sixth annual evening star party (a once a year evening event) from 6 to 9 p.m. Saturday, October 8. Dr. Paul Verhage will offer stargazing tips and a presentation about planets, autumn constellations, and the latest celestial discoveries. There will also be fun, hands-on astronomy activities. For more info about Second Saturday programs, go to http://bee.cityofboise.org/foothills/learn/second-saturday-program/.

October 8 & 9

Dirty Dash October 8

The Dirty Dash is an obstacle course where participants run through mountains of thick sludge, overcome challenging obstacles and, well, wallow in the mud like a pig. It is set for Saturday, October 8, at Streams Edge Way in Garden City. There will be more than one run; go to thedirtydash.com for details. The event is child-friendly.

October 8

Kids Discovery Expo October 8

Kids may explore, create and discover at the Kids Discovery Expo from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Saturday, October 8, at Expo Idaho. There will be more than 60 exhibits; other highlights will include mini train rides, a jump house, a tsunami wave, face painting, bubble soccer, a petting zoo, reptiles, clowns and much more. Admission is free.

Canyon County Classic

Superhero 5K

The Caldwell YMCA Canyon County Coyote Classic, a run similar to the Harrison Classic Kids Run in Boise, is set for 10 a.m. Saturday, October 8, in Caldwell. Contact the Treasure Valley YMCA at ymcatvidaho.org or 454-9622 for more information. The YMCA in Caldwell is located at 3720 S. Indiana Ave.

The 3rd Annual Superhero 5K/1 mile, to benefit Camp Rainbow Gold’s support of Idaho children diagnosed with cancer, is set to begin at 10:30 a.m. Sunday, October 9, at Expo Idaho. Cost is $20 for adults and $10 for children 12 and under. Register at BlueCircleSports. com. For more information, go to http://ibleventsinc.com/events/ superhero-5k.

October 8

Idaho Beef Council Race for the Steaks October 8

The second annual Idaho Beef Council Race for the Steaks, benefitting the Treasure Valley YMCA, will be held from 5 to 8 p.m. Saturday, October 8, at Ann Morrison Park. The evening run will be capped off by a Tri Tip Steak Dinner in the park. The dinner is free to all race participants, but additional dinner tickets may be purchased in advance for just $10. Race prices range from $25 to $50. Go to http://www. ymcatvidaho.org/runs/ymca-race-for-the-steaks/. Come enjoy a beautiful fall evening along the Boise River and Greenbelt. The race begins and ends in the park.

Fire Station Open House October 8

Fire Station 1 in Meridian will hold a free open house for the public from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. Saturday, October 8, at 540 E. Franklin Rd. The open house is presented jointly by the Meridian Fire and Police departments. The whole family may come out and meet McGruff and Sparky and enjoy face painting, a 911 simulator, and various demonstrations. Also, meet some Meridian firefighters and police officers. Free hot dogs will be available.

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October 9

Harrison Classic Kids Run October 9

The YMCA Harrison Classic is a one-mile race for kids 13 and under of all abilities. Participation is the goal of the race, and everyone who participates is a winner, whether or not they finish. The run will start at 3 p.m. Sunday, October 9, down Boise’s historic Harrison Boulevard. Live music will be provided by Boise Rock School. Costs range from $20 to $30. Go to http://www.ymcatvidaho.org/runs/harrison-classickids-run/.

Foster Care Program Info Meetings October 11 & 13

There is a tremendous need for foster families in the Treasure Valley. Two informational meetings are set for October, as follows: 9:30 to 11 a.m., Tuesday, October 11, at Groove Coffee, 1800 N. Locust Grove Rd. in Meridian; and from 10 to 11:30 a.m. Thursday, October 13, at the Department of Health and Welfare office, 3402 Franklin Rd. in Caldwell. For more information, contact Recruitment Coordinator Monique Layton at mlayton4@ewu.edu or 249-0180.

More Events on Page 12 Idaho Family Magazine | October 2016 11


CALENDAR of Events

Continued from page 11

Lawson’s Emu-Z-um and Cleo’s Landing at Walter’s Ferry

performers from the East Coast, and more. For more information, go to http://www.cityofnampa.us/Index.aspx?NID=725.

Join the Nampa Rec Center for a trip to two of Canyon County’s bestkept secrets. From 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Tuesday, October 11, travel back in time to an authentic replica of an early 1860’s town, complete with wooden sidewalks. Lawson’s Emu-Z-um has antique farm equipment, period clothing, and more than 100 emus. Then, walk Cleo’s Nature Trail along the Snake River and see statues of fairies, gnomes and angels. The $20 cost of the day trip includes transportation, admission fees, water and lunch. Departure and return is at the Rec Center. Go to http://www.nampaparksandrecreation.org/.

October 20

October 11

Apple Stamping October 12

The Library! at Collister will hold after-school fun with apple stamping (making prints with real apples — a fun fall activity) from 4 to 5 p.m. Wednesday, October 12. This program is for children ages 6-12. Contact Jennifer Laraway at 972-8320 for more information.

Teen, other programs at Nampa Public Library October 13 & 27

The Nampa library holds movie nights and other programs for teens and younger children throughout the month. An anime program for kids ages 8-12 is set for 4:30 to 5:30 p.m. Thursday, October 13; a Teen Anime Club program will be held from 5:30 to 6:30 p.m. Thursday, October 27. Go to nampalibrary.org.

Molly in the Mineshaft October 15

A sensory-friendly/special needs concert begins at noon Friday, October 14, at Langroise Recital Hall on the College of Idaho campus in Caldwell, with instrument-making and a musical “petting zoo.” A 45minute Molly in the Mineshaft concert will follow at 1 p.m. Cost is $6 for all. Then, Molly in the Mineshaft — billed as a “newgrass” group — will perform before a full audience at 7 p.m. Saturday, October 15, in Jewett Auditorium. For tickets and (much) more information, go to caldwellfinearts.org. (The Horszowski Trio, featuring a pianist, violinist and cellist, will perform at 7 p.m. Thursday, November 3. See the website for details.)

Kiwanis Comfort Kits for Kids October 15

All are welcome to help stuff backpacks and bags with basic comfort supplies for children who have been removed from their homes and relocated. Come to the large conference room at the Cherry Lane branch of the Meridian library from 1 to 4 p.m. Saturday, October 15.

Sun Valley Jazz and Music Festival Kickoff October 17-18

This prelude to the Sun Valley Jazz & Music Festival will be held October 17-18 at the Nampa Civic Center. Highlights will include a Cajun Zydeco Band, a New Orleans Cajun buffet, classic jazz

12 October 2016 | Idaho Family Magazine

Hike Noble Reserve Tour of the Reserves: A Hiking Series is presented by the City of Boise and the Idaho Conservation League on the third Thursdays of the month from 5:30 to 7 p.m. (except in November, when times are 4 to 6 p.m.). All hikes are no more than three miles and are free and family-friendly (but no pets, please). Pre-registration is required; for details, call 345-6933, ext. 16. The hike for October 20 will be at Noble Reserve, home to many species of wildlife, including black bears, mountain lions, and elk.

Animal Presentation October 20

Petco is giving an animal presentation on the third Thursday of the month at Nampa Public Library. The October program will be from 4 to 5 p.m. October 20. Go to nampalibrary.org.

Home School Days at the WaterShed October 20

The Boise WaterShed will offer a free program for home school children from 10 a.m. to noon Thursday, October 20. All classes require pre-registration at least one week in advance by calling 608-7300 or emailing BW@cityofboise.org. (See a full listing of programs on the calendar at bee.cityofboise.org/ James Eberle watershed.) Another Home School Day is set for December 15. Show in Dece IceWorld’s ad he performed Marriage Renovation ers. (Photo pr

October 20-23

A new program of Renovation Group Ministries called Marriage Renovation will be held October 20-23. Cost is $250. More information will be available at renovationgroupministries. org; or contact Director Sharon Prosch at 631-5841, info@ renovationgroupministries.org or sharon.prosch@teenrenovation.org.

Inspirational Book Club October 21

Enjoy reading clean and inspirational books? If so, then the Inspirational Book Club is for you. The club meets once a month from 10:30 to 11:30 a.m. on the third Friday of each month at the Cherry Lane branch of the Meridian library. October’s meeting will be held October 21; the featured book will be “The First Phone Call from Heaven” by Mitch Albom. No sign-up is required, and interested people are welcome to pick up a copy of the book at the library. For more information, email katie@mld.org or call 888-4451.

Ladies Only Swim October 22 & November 19

Women of all ages should grab their sisters, daughters, mothers and gal pals and attend a ladies only swim night at the Nampa Rec Center. The event is planned for 7:15 to 9 p.m. Saturday, October 22, and again on November 19. Members may swim for free; cost for non-members is $4.

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Tween Robotics & Tinkering

information or to RSVP, go to www.meridianmadc.org or call Kendall Nagy at 846-7313.

Young people between the ages of 8-12 are welcome to attend a program held from 4:30 to 5:30 p.m. on the fourth Monday of the month at the Cherry Lane branch of the Meridian library. On October 24, participants will explore different robotic-based activities, as well as circuitry and tinkering. This is a drop-in program, meaning no sign-up is required. For more information, email trevor@mld.org.

Craft & Chocolate Affaire

October 24

Afterschool Book Club October 25

Young book lovers ages 9-12 are invited to join the Afterschool Book Club, which meets from 4:30 to 5:30 p.m. on the fourth Tuesday of the month at the Cherry Lane branch of the Meridian library to talk about a book or a book series of the month. Then, attendees enjoy an after-school snack. The books for the October 25 program are “Smiles” and “Sisters” by Raina Telgemeier. Read one or both. Go to mld.org.

Idaho IceWorld classes and events October 27, 29 & November 1

Idaho IceWorld at 7072 S. Eisenman Rd. in Boise holds many skate classes and events throughout the year. Learn to Skate Orientation is set for October e performed in Idaho IceWorld’s Ice 27, while the Halloween-focused fun ember of 2015. He is enrolled in of Spooktacular is planned for October daptive skating program, and the group 29. The following month, Hockey with last year was called The FightLearn to Play and Learn to Skate begin rovided by Idaho IceWorld) November 1. For more information, go to idahoiceworld.com.

Disney’s “The Little Mermaid” October 27-29

The Nampa Civic Center will be the site of a live performance of Disney’s “ The Little Mermaid” October 27-29. There will be multiple showings at various times. Go to nampaciviccenter.com.

LSMS Holiday Bazaar October 29-30

Lowell Scott Middle School will host its annual holiday bazaar from 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Saturday, October 29, and 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Sunday, October 30. There will be live music, local performers, holiday shopping, and delicious treats. More than 60 vendors are expected. There is no entrance fee. The school is located at 13600 W. McMillan Rd. in Boise. Go to http://lsmsholidaybazaar.webs.com/.

November 4-5

This annual kick-off to the Christmas season is set for November 4-5 at the Nampa Civic Center. Chocolate, chocolate and more chocolate (and wine!) will highlight this event. Go to http://www.cityofnampa. us/Index.aspx?NID=725 for more information.

Couples Getaway November 4-6

A Couples Getaway sponsored by the Fellowship of Christian Athletes is set for November 4-6 at Hunt Lodge in McCall. There will be speakers and other highlights. Cost is $275 per couple, and the event is expected to fill up fast. For more information, call 871-1020 or 697-1051; or, visit http://www.fcaidaho.org/couples-getaway.

Velma V. Morrison Family Theatre Series November 11

The Kennedy Center’s Elephant & Piggie’s “We Are in a Play!” will be presented at 7 p.m. Friday, November 11, at the Morrison Center. This “romp of a musical” is recommended for ages 4 and up. Cost is $6.50 (ticketing fees not included). Go to http://www.morrisoncenter. com/events/detail/elephant-piggie.

Traditions of Christmas December

Traditions of Christmas, a Radio City Music Hall-style show, will be presented in December at the Nampa Civic Center, 311 3rd St. S. Throughout the show, favorite Christmas classics are brought to life with song and dance, including choreographed kick-line tap numbers. There will be a trip to Santa’s workshop, USO-style performances for the military, and a grand conclusion with the Nativity. The show will feature a cast of 70 people, spectacular sets, live animals, and over 400 costumes. Dates include: 7 p.m., December 15; 7 p.m., December 16; 3 p.m. & 7 p.m., December 17; 3 p.m., December 18; 3 p.m. & 7 p.m., December 22; and 3 p.m., December 23. For general information and group sales, call 391-2867 or email info@lauralittletheatricals.com. To purchase tickets, go to http://www.TraditonsofChristmasNW.com or call 468-5500. Tickets are $33 for adults, $26 for military and seniors, and $20 for children.

LIFT event January 25

LIFT, a gathering of women to help you Live Inspired, Fearless, and Thriving, to be encouraged and discover more about your value and purpose, will meet from 7 to 9 p.m. Wednesday, January 25, at The Ambrose School in Meridian. Register at liftedhigh.org. The organization is sponsored by SEARCH, a faith-based organization that provides a safe place for women to come together and explore questions about life and God. Women from all faiths and perspectives are welcome.

Reality Party for Parents October 29

This event will be presented by the Meridian Anti-Drug Coalition from 1 to 4 p.m. Saturday, October 29, at the Forward Movement Training Center, 125 W. Taylor Ave., No. 600, in Meridian. For more

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Halloween Events on Page 14 Idaho Family Magazine | October 2016 13


HALLOWEEN & Harvest Events Scarecrow Stroll — The Idaho Botanical Garden is holding its annual Scarecrow Stroll October 1-31. Scarecrows may be found throughout the Garden, welcoming guests of all ages to vote for their favorite scarecrow — each scarecrow having been put together by families, organizations and businesses throughout the area. The Scarecrow Stroll takes place during regular Garden hours for the Garden’s regular price of admission. Go to idahobotanicalgarden.org. This year’s theme is “Idaho History.”

The Haunted World — The Haunted World at 20031 Northside Blvd. in Caldwell is now open through October for a frightfully good time. Tickets are sold from dusk to 10 p.m. on weekdays and from dusk to midnight on weekends. Haunted World is closed on Sundays. Haunted World has “perfected the art of fear”; go and ‘enjoy’ two hours of unrivaled terror guaranteed to eclipse your worst nightmare. See hauntedworld.org for more information. Linder Farms — Linder Farms at 7165 S. Linder Rd. in Meridian is hosting several events for the Halloween and harvest season. The “Official Corn Maze of the Boise State Broncos” is open during the following hours: 5 to 9 p.m. Monday through Thursday; 5 to 10 p.m. on Friday; 10 a.m. to 10 p.m. on Saturday; and closed on Sunday. Linder Farms also offers a Zombie Acres attraction, as well as a Halloween Fun Run beginning at 9 a.m. Saturday, October 29. Admission for the run opens at 8:15 a.m., and an all-you-can-eat pumpkin pie pancake breakfast will be served at 8:30. More information about all these events is available at linderfarms.com, by calling 371-0222, or by emailing info@linderfarms.com.

maze that is visible from I-84. Other features include a Bee Line, Farm Pond Fishing, The Cookie Creamery, Duck Races, and a Sundown Marshmallow Roast. (Friday Night Fireworks are also a big attraction.) For more information, go to farmsteadfestival.com, call 922-5678, or email maize@farmsteadfestival.com.

Emmett Harvest Fair & Street Festival — The rural Emmett lifestyle is celebrated during an annual harvest time event beginning at noon Friday, October 7, and at 10 a.m. Saturday, October 8, in the community’s Pioneer Park. Highlights will include music, movies, family activities, and lots of delicious food. There are also several “you pick” orchards in the area, with an Orchard Map available to show participants where to go. Visit emmettidaho.com. 10th Annual Boise Zombie Walk — A large group of people of all ages — infant to elderly — gather together dressed as zombies and shuffle, limp, waddle, crawl or just plain walk the streets of downtown Boise. The (creepy) event starts off in Capitol Park, 601 W. Jefferson St., at 5 p.m. Saturday, October 8. Go to https://www. boiseonlinemall.com/event/10th-annual-boisezombie-walk. Masks, masks, masks — Elementary-age children are welcome to come create masks during Kids Saturday Fun from 2 to 3 p.m. Saturday, October 8, at Eagle Public Library.

Haunted Halloween Trolley Tours — Haunted Halloween Trolley Tours will be given October 11-26 on Friday and Saturday nights beginning at 8 p.m. The tours are offered by American Heritage Trolley Tours, 2288 N. Garden St. in Boise (across from Joe’s Crab The Farmstead — The Farmstead at 1020 S. Shack in the small parking lot on Garden Street). Rockham Way in Meridian offers a variety of For more information, call 433-0849 or go to fun events for the fall season, including a corn americanheritagetrolleytours.com. Creepy Critter Encounters — Families, kids, and kids at heart are invited to come in costume and celebrate the spooky season with a wildlife twist at the Deer Flat National Wildlife Refuge Visitor Center, 13751 Upper Embankment Rd. in Nampa. The fun will take place from 3 to 6 p.m. Saturday, October 29, and will feature live animals, wildlife stories, festive crafts, and a hike along the Nature Trail. The free event will be held rain or shine. For more information or to volunteer, call 467-9278, Volunteer Starlynn Robbins shows a child a stuffed owl at a Creepy Critters Encoun- email deerflat@fws.gov or ter at the Deer Flat National Wildlife Refuge Visitor Center. (Photo by Robert Allen) https://www.fws.gov/deerflat/

14 October 2016 | Idaho Family Magazine

Each year, the Idaho Botanical Garden holds a Scarecrow Stroll and invites people to vote on their favorite scarecrow. Prizes are awarded. (From the IBG website) Idaho Horror Film Festival — The 3rd Annual Idaho Horror Film Festival will return to Boise October 13-15 at the Egyptian Theatre in downtown Boise. Go to idahohorrorfilmfestival.org. Haunted Ectoplasmic Games — Middleand high school-age youngsters are invited to come be mesmerized by glow-in-the-dark fun during Teen After-Hours from 6:30 to 8:30 p.m. Friday, October 14, at Eagle Public Library. Zoo Boise’s Spooktacular — Zoo Boise’s Spooktacular event features a lighted walking tour with fun Halloween displays and activities for younger children. Spooktacular will take place during the evenings of October 14-16 and October 21-23 from 6 to 9 p.m. weeknights and Saturdays and from 5:30 to 8 p.m. on Sundays. Dracula at Boise Little Theater — Boise Little Theater is bringing Bram Stocker’s classic novel to the stage October 14-29. The play is suitable for adult audiences only. For ticket and other information, go to http://boiselittletheater. org/current-season/. (For the Christmas season, BLT will present “Miracle on 34th Street,” suitable for the entire family.) Fall Festival at Boise WaterShed — Come celebrate the beautiful colors of fall, beginning at 10 a.m. Saturday, October 15, at the Boise WaterShed. There will be fall-themed arts and crafts, pumpkin painting, catching an apple on a string with your teeth, and a hayride. Also, “slithery, slimy friends” are back in the form of live reptiles. The event is for the entire family, and admission is free (no pre-registration required). Go to bee.cityofboise.org/watershed. Notus Harvest Festival — Notus will hold its 5th Annual Harvest Festival beginning at 10 a.m. Saturday, October 15. Highlights will include a car show, classic pinup girl contest, live music, vendors, games, hayrides, a scarecrow expo,

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and The Great Notus Baked Potato Feed. There will be something for everyone in the family — and the potato feed is budget-friendly. Fallapalooza — Fallapalooza is set for 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Saturday, October 15, at Ann Morrison Park in Boise. Free to attend, the event will include a silent auction, pie-eating contest, kids’ area with games, bounce houses, purple pumpkin painting, guest speakers, live performances, a marketplace, and food and drink. The event is held in celebration of the good work of the Women’s and Children’s Alliance. Go to fallapalooza.com. Eagle Harvest Festival — Eagle will hold a celebration of the harvest from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m. Saturday, October 15, at Heritage Park, 185 E. State St. The free event will feature pumpkin decorating, face painting, cookie decorating, kids’ games, and more. For more information, contact the City of Eagle Parks & Recreation Department at 489-8763 or parks@cityofeagle.org. Collister Creep Week — The Library! at Collister is holding Collister Creep Week for teens and adults. The program from 7 to 9 p.m. Tuesday, October 18, will be on food preparation for the Zombie Apocalypse. Join Anjel Griggs of Boise Grange to learn how to create a stockpile of preserved and dehydrated food. The program on October 19 will feature Tracie Ide of Idaho Krav Maga teaching the basics of “supernatural

self-defense” against zombies, vampires and other creepy predators. For more information about this week of Halloween fun (and some facts to go along with it), call 972-8320 or go to the calendar at boisepubliclibrary.org. Leaf Painting — A highlight of the fall season is collecting leaves and painting them. The Library! at Collister will host an after-school fun event for kids 6-12 from 4 to 5 p.m. Wednesday, October 19. The after-school program is ongoing throughout the school year at this and other libraries throughout the valley. Visit your local library for more details. Idaho Gourd Society’s 18th Annual Festival and Gourd Sale — This annual event is set for 9 a.m. to 5 p.m. Saturday, October 22, and 9 a.m. to 4 p.m. Sunday, October 23, at Wyndham Garden Boise Airport Hotel, 3300 S. Vista Ave. The festival features original gourd art on display and for purchase, as well as other holiday gift items, “make and take” activities for kids and adults, a silent auction and more. Cost to attend is only $2 for adults and children 10 and under, and free for children 9 and under. Go to idahogourdsociety.org. Funtober Fest — Sponsored by Walmart, the Funtober Fest is an invitation to enjoy harvest fun from 1 to 4 p.m. Saturday, October 22, at the Nampa Rec Center. This is an outdoor, carnivalstyle event and will include face painting, crafts,

dancing, storytelling, a costume contest, games and more. It’s a “something for everyone” fun time. Cost is $5 for members and $6 for nonmembers. Harvest Fest Week — Adults (only), join the fun at the Library! at Cole & Ustick for a Cult Movie Horror Film & Pizza from 6:30 to 8 p.m. Tuesday, October 25. The movie features a group of scientists who develop a machine called the Resonator, which allows anyone within range of it to see beyond normal, perceptible reality... and then things get weird. The film is R-rated. Children, teens and adults are all invited to the library’s Halloween Craft Night from 6:30 to 8 p.m. Wednesday, October 26. Call 972-8300 for more information about both events, and go to the calendar at boisepubliclibrary.org for information about other fun programs during the week. Trunk or Treat and Dance to the Beat in Meridian — Mark Halloween outside at Meridian City Hall from 6 to 9 p.m. Thursday, October 27, with a Trunk or Treat event and lots of music. Go to meridiancity.org. Idaho IceWorld Spooktacular — Idaho IceWorld at 7072 S. Eisenman Rd. in Boise holds many skate classes and events throughout the year. The Halloween-focused fun of Spooktacular is planned for October 29. For more information, go to idahoiceworld.com.

Continued on page 17

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Idaho Family Magazine | October 2016 15


Halloween parties

How to keep the fun in playing games By Bobbie Berendson

W

hat to do at a party has long been the biggest question for me when it comes to party planning. There are so many games out there on the internet to try, more than you could play in a year of parties, so figuring out what to do is not as difficult as how to do it. How do we herd the party guests from activity to activity? This is very difficult if you have games that hold less interest to your guests than talking or playing with each other. Children’s parties are a good example of how easy it can be to lose interest or attention when the activities are not just right. Most kids will try any game, but if it proves too difficult or too easy for their age, they often lose interest quickly. So it is very important that the activities you plan work for the ages you have. Many of the parties I host that have children involved usually consist of kids ages 2-12. I have found the best way to format a party with this age group is to divide the time into sections: food time, craft time, play time, and game time. First, we eat since that can be done as people trickle in for the party. Then, it is a good

time for crafts. At a Halloween party, we usually make our trick-or-treat bags. We provide foam stickers, markers, glitter glue, and other odds and ends. Each child gets a bag, stickers, and access to tools that are age-appropriate. The best thing about using stickers is that a 2-year-old can enjoy the project with very little help. After craft time is play time. This can last from 20 minutes to 2 hours — it is entirely up to you and the parents. It is also a good time for the adults to get a chance to hang out and chat while the kids play. This time is meant to help the kids get their wiggles out so that they are ready for the next section: game time. These games can be relay races, bobbing for apples, even group board games. I don’t recommend giving prizes for winning the games at kids’ parties. I have found that with most children, it takes all the fun out of playing and over-emphasizes winning. I want the kids to enjoy the game for the play, not the outcome. At the end, each kid gets a party bag full of toys and some candy. For adult parties, I would keep the game time down to 30 percent or less of the actual party since they prefer to chat and joke and catch up with each other more than play. I like to do a photo booth for people to take pictures in their costumes. They can do this while they mingle, and it helps mix everybody up a bit. They have a lot of fun with or without props, so decide if you have the energy to make them or not. I have found most party board games can also be easily altered to fit a seasonal party. I have some versions of Scatter-

16 October 2016 | Idaho Family Magazine

gories that I have done with the following themes: Halloween, Christmas, Thanksgiving, bridal, baby, birthday, etc. One game we always play is White Elephant Bingo. In this game each adult brings one silly gift and one great gift. We place all the gifts in the middle of the table. Then I give each person a laminated Halloween bingo card and a dry erase marker. You can find programs that automatically generate bingo cards in a variety of themes online, and the markers I get at the dollar store for just a couple of bucks. Then we play bingo…just like you did in kindergarten. Each time you get a bingo you take a present out of the middle, but you do not open it. You do not clear your card until you get a bingo. When all the presents have been taken, we open them all and do what we call the lightning round. This is a high-speed bingo game in which each bingo winner gets to trade what they have for something someone else has. At the end of 2 minutes, the game is done and everyone goes home with what they have left. It is so much fun. (Kids get too attached to their presents, so I would not play this game with them.) The best advice I have is this: know your audience. Make sure things are ageappropriate and playable and that you don’t force participation in games or activities. n As you get ready to celebrate this holiday season, check out MaryAnnsCupboards.com for more ideas and games that are easy, fun, budget-friendly and bring a little more joy to your upcoming holidays.

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WHO said what

Events

Continued from page 15 Geeks Unite – Tim Burton Soiree — What’s this, what’s this? There are monsters everywhere! Teens ages 13-18 are invited to the once-a-month after-hours program Geeks Unite from 6 to 8 p.m. at the Cherry Lane branch of the Meridian library. On Friday, October 28, geeks will unite Tim Burton-style, so beware! Movies shown will be rated up to PG-13. Go to mld.org. Frightened Felons Family Night — The Old Idaho Penitentiary will hold its annual Frightened Felons Family Night from 7 to 11 p.m. Friday, October 28, at 2445 Old Penitentiary Rd. in Boise. Tour the facility at night and see if you are brave enough to enter the only haunted cell house in Boise. There will be a special performance of the Zombie “Thriller” Dance; costume contests with cash prizes; a visit with the undertaker at the historic hearse; and food from BBQ Guy, Wood Fired Pizza, and Ben & Jerry’s. The event sells out every year. Tickets are available now at http://www.brownpapertickets.com/event/2600336. For more information, go to https://history.idaho.gov/events/frightenedfelons-family-night-1. Halloween Run — The YMCA Halloween Run offers a 1-mile or 5K course through the heart of downtown Boise as the sun sets. Both courses start and finish at the Capitol Building, and both runs are set to start at 6 p.m. Saturday, October 29. Racers wear costumes, neon or fluorescent clothing, glowsticks, lights and...whatever. Use your imagination. (There will be a costume contest that starts at 5:30.) Costs to participate range from $20 to $35. Children are welcome to participate as well. Go to http://www.ymcatvidaho.org/runs/halloween-run-and-bike-parade/. Boo at the Zoo — The annual Halloween event at Zoo Boise will be held from 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. (last admission 4:30) Saturday, October 29. There will be costumed characters passing out candy, costume contests for all ages, games, pumpkin patch photos, face painting and, of course, the animals at the zoo. Go to zooboise.org. Symphony Orchestra Spooktacular — The Department of Music at Boise State University will present its annual Spooktacular event beginning at 7:30 p.m. Sunday, October 30, at the Morrison Center. Admission is $7 for adults and $5 for seniors. Children of any age will be admitted for free. Tickets will be available at the door. For more information, go to http://www.morrisoncenter.com/events/detail/ symphony-orchestra-spooktacular. Halloween Sleepover at Wings — The Wings Center will host one of its biggest events of the year — the Halloween Sleepover for kids ages 5-12 — from 7 p.m. Saturday, October 29, to 9 a.m. Sunday, October 31. Children are invited to explore Planet Kid, climb and swing in the rock gym, and bounce on inflatables. Pizza and “witch’s brew” will be served. Kids may dress in their favorite costumes and search through the center on a Goodie Quest. For cost of the event and to register, call 376-3641 or go to http://www.wingscenter.com/halloween-sleepover/.

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Pando is the brainchild of Roots Family History, a company resulting from the merger between two prominent Boise shops, Media Specialties and MediaFox. The company is on a mission to archive and preserve human history, and that is exactly what they are doing with their newest venture, Pando. Pando is a family history game consisting of two decks of Pando cards and a set of simple rules. Through a series of questions carefully designed to evoke memories, family members secretly write their answers then try to guess who said what. The game is designed to be played with grown children, their parents and their grandparents revealing stories several generations deep — one sentence and one word at a time.

Unearthing Stories

As family members attempt to guess who said what, they learn when Grandpa met Grandma, what pranks Dad used to play on his siblings, and what Moms earliest memory is. What’s more, the older generation learns the same of the younger generation. Pando bridges the gap between generations, connecting grandparents, parents, and children on a deeper level.

Getting Laughs

The hilarity of gameplay comes during the guessing phase. Trying to guess Grandma’s high school GPA or when Mom had her first kiss instantly conjures a room full of nostalgia and the sound of roaring laughter. Roots Family History will distribute Pando in specialty book stores, game shops, and online retailers all over the continental U.S. in 2017. Pando will retail for $24.99 at the end of June, 2017 but will be available for purchase via Kickstarter for $20 throughout the campaign. Pando is the goto household game for family gatherings, especially when Grandma and/or Grandpa come to visit.

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Idaho Family Magazine | October 2016 17


CRAFTS On A Dime

Stain wood without fumes or chemicals By Samantha Stillman

I

am always interested in new, green ways to do things, especially when they can save me money. Stained wood looks so beautiful, but the fumes are awful and full of chemicals. I have tried tea-stained paper before to make it look old so why not try it on wood? You can try various combinations and paint colors, and that is what makes this so fun to experiment with. Even my little helper enjoyed himself. This method is good if you only have a few minutes; you can paint some, leave it and come back and paint more as you work around the house. The end result was more a weathered color; so, if you are trying to make wood look older, I suggest using coffee or tea and adding the black paint. Weathered wood looks great among your fall and winter dĂŠcor. Happy crafting! n

1 Samantha Stillman is a Treasure Valley crafts instructor and freelance writer. She may be reached at craftsonadime10@gmail.com.

Supplies needed: Picture 1 Wood Cup of strong coffee Cup of tea (I used two bags) Paintbrush Cup of water Black acrylic paint

2

3

18 June 2016 | Idaho Family Magazine

Instructions:

Samantha Stillman

1. I divided the wood into four test areas. Area 1 is coffee. Area 2 is tea. Area 3 is coffee with black paint. Area 4 is tea with black paint. 2. I applied 4 layers of just coffee and tea to areas 1 and 2. Paint your wood and leave it a few minutes before you paint another layer. You can see on the right the difference of color in the accompanying photo. The tea and coffee alone produced a more honey, natural color than the wood alone. Picture 2 3. Next, I added 4 drops of black paint to each cup and painted one layer on areas 3 and 4. With each layer I added a bit more black paint to darken it. In the end, I had 5 layers on the right two areas and used 20 drops of black paint in each cup. The key is to let the wood soak it in between layers. Different woods will produce different results. Picture 3

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moMENts

Having to move a bad trick with no treat er and I’ll probably have a new box labeled “6th Grade” hidden under the bed. Speaking of boxes, as I unpacked a wardrobe box, I came up with a great idea for a Halloween costume. I could cut armholes in the side of the box y wife Mattie played a and stand in it. There would be plenty of room to stash trick on me. “I’ve been Halloween candy. offered the job,” she Though the move is technically over, hours of work said, turning life upside remain to unpack, organize, and hang pictures. We also down for me, our daughter Jessie, and need to begin the long process of getting to know our new even the dog. city. That’s when, I hope, the treats will come, as we find Shortly before Halloween last year, new things to love about the place where we now reside Mattie went on an interview for a job and the people who live here. six hours away.... Though I’m my wife’s In the meantime, I’ll need a boxful of patience (and biggest fan, we’ve moved several times more chocolate). And when Mattie thinks of something together in the past, so I’ve seen that else to add to my lengthy to-do list, I think I’ll hide in my trick before. Moving is no treat! wardrobe box. Maybe she’ll walk right past me, since I’ll “I’m launching my first book; the timPatrick Hempfing blend in with all the other unpacked boxes. I just hope ing is terrible,” I said. For Jessie, 11 years she doesn’t look under the bed. old and strongly attached to friends she Until next month, remember to cherish the moments. Happy had known since she was 2, leaving seemed unthinkable. Jessie’s Halloween! n opinion about moving was an unqualified “No!” Many tears punctuated her words. But we supported Mattie’s decision and Patrick Hempfing had a 20-year professional career in banking, acshe signed the employment contract. counting, and auditing before he became a father at age 44. He is now a The last few months, like Halloween, have been scary at times and fun at others, and lots of chocolate has mysteriously vanished full-time husband, stay-at-home dad, and writer. Follow Patrick at www. facebook.com/patricklhempfing and on Twitter @PatrickHempfing. His from our kitchen. It takes a bagful of patience (and quite a few book is available on amazon.com. pounds of sweet comfort food) before, during, and after a move. Jessie’s last day at her old school proved especially challenging. I held my breath that she would “hold it together” through the end-of-year program. Fortunately, she kept her composure and appeared poised on stage for all of her parts. However, when the program ended, Jessie and her friends had a hug and cryfest that started in the auditorium, moved to the classroom, and continued down the hallway as we tried to leave. Her teacher commented that we might have to take one of the girls with us because she kept clinging to Jessie and sobbing. The dreaded packing came next. How did we accumulate so much stuff ? If there is a positive in moving, it’s the opportunity to get rid of things that haven’t been used in years. “Goodbye tight pants. You won’t be taking up my limited closet space.” Conversely, for a “hoarder of memories,” letting go of sentimental stuff is painful. From pre-school through third grade, I dutifully saved all of Jessie’s art and school work. I’m an “organized saver” so I had most things in boxes, labeled with the year and place where she made the masterpieces, plus a big cabinet full of larger pieces that wouldn’t fit into the boxes, like the purple monster she made from a milk jug. My self-imposed goal was to select the “best of Jessie” from seven boxes and squeeze it into one box the same size. With lots of help from my less-sentimental wife and daughter, I reached my goal, even though the lid wouldn’t stay on. Jessie and I used some ground rules as we sifted through the boxes over several days. Anything with her hand or footprint, photos of her, or that said “I Love You, Daddy” was a keeper. Mattie assisted for some of the sorting sessions, and she and Jessie often repeated the dreaded words: “Toss it!” Though it wasn’t a fun process for a dad who likes to hold on to anything associated with his little girl (after all, my first book’s subtitle is “A Dad Holds On”), we had some special family moments as we recalled Jessie’s early years. By the time you read this column, Jessie will be a middle schoolBy Patrick Hempfing

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Idaho Family Magazine | October 2016 19


Idaho carousels

Praise for machines of science and beauty By Joe Zentner

L

ions, tigers, bears, giraffes and panthers appear, as do camels, rabbits, pigs, horses, hyenas and an occasional sea monster. Welcome aboard an antique carousel and its menagerie of magical-appearing animals. Carousels have long been a cornerstone of Idaho amusement parks and have found a home today in some urban shopping malls. A carousel is an amusement park ride consisting of a rotating platform with seats for passengers. The “seats” traditionally are attached to wooden horses or other animals, which are moved mechanically in an up and down manner to simulate galloping, accompanied often by circus-inspired organ music. While the terms are often used interchangeably, an authentic carousel features horses only; a merry-go-round includes all sorts of animals, and has bench seats as well. “Carousel” is the name most often used in North America, while in Europe the term “merry-go-round” is more common; however, both terms are understood to mean about the same thing. Merry-gorounds and carousels often are housed in an enclosed building called a hippodrome (from the Greek word hippodromos — a stadium originally built for chariot races). History. The earliest known carousel is depicted in a Byzantine bas-relief sculpture showing figures projecting from the background, dated at around 500 AD. This depiction features riders in baskets suspended from a central pole. The word “carousel” itself originates from the Italian garosello and Spanish carosella (“little war”), used by Christian crusaders to describe a cavalry combat exercise engaged in by horsemen. Crusaders brought the idea of equine combat preparation back with them from the Holy Land to their native lands. Eventually, carousel-related activities were installed to entertain royal patrons in private gardens. Accompanying the development of European craft guilds, carousels operated at social gatherings in central Europe and

England. By 1745, wagon maker Michael Dentzel had succeeded in converting his wagon-making business in what is today southern Germany into a carousel-making enterprise. Animal figures were crafted during the winter months and the family then went touring throughout the region, operating their menagerie carousel at various venues. In Idaho, early carousels were put together by farmers who wanted to create interesting playthings for their children. These farmers attached primitively carved horses to a simple carousel that was powered by mules. In the 1870s, the spinning playthings became more like the carousels in use today, accompanied by organ music and turned by steam engines that lifted the animals up and down as they spun around. Around the turn of the 20th century, some Idaho towns began placing picnic groves at the end of transportation lines in order to attract riders; eventually those groves were turned into amusement parks. Such facilities sometimes featured a carousel. During the Great Depression, many amusement parks closed. Carousels were dismantled and the carved horses discarded, except for those that were retired to the homes of park employees and other enthusiasts who came under their spell. Some 70 years ago, as carousels began approaching endangered species status, people started collecting them in earnest. Between l885 and 1930, American craftsmen created more than 2,000 hand-carved wooden carousels. Today, fewer than 200 still operate in the United States. Woodworkers spent most of their time carving the horses that rode on the outside of the carousel. That’s because these horses are larger — there’s more room on the outside of a carousel — and because these were the ones that people watching from the fairgrounds most often noticed. The horse that is on the outside directly behind the chariot is referred to as the ‘lead’ horse. These are usually the fanciest on the ride. Benches for people who do not want to hold the ‘reins’ of a horse are called ‘chariots’. Craftsmen carved their horses in three styles.

20 October 2016 | Idaho Family Magazine

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10-16

Some time later, he built his first carousel. The Country Fair Style animals, built G.A. Dentzel Steam and Horsepower Carousel by such carvers as Allan Herschell, Company was established in 1867; soon thereafter, were produced for rural fairs and a unique type of European-inspired American traveling carnivals. carousel went into production. Those carved by Made to be durable, the horse’s ears Charles Looff, Charles Carmel and Marcus Illion, were carved flat against the head to among others, followed in Dentzel’s footsteps. protect them from bangs and bumps By 1903, the Dentzel Company was building six encountered during transport. The Alcarousels a year. Apart from horses, deer were the lan Herschell Co. of North Tonawaanimals most often carved by Dentzel craftsmen. nda, N.Y. was once the largest manuDentzel carved one lion and one tiger when facturer of carousels in the world. The making a menagerie carousel. Appearing on the Herschell firm produced some unique outside stationary row of figures, both of these menagerie figures, including a carouanimals are striking in their lifelike appearance. sel frog. The company also carved sea Humanlike carvings, known as side figures, monsters. sometimes appear with the animals. A Dentzel Coney Island Horses, built carousel that once operated in Boise featured a by such carvers and companies as tiger with a side figure depicting Teddy Roosevelt Charles Looff, Charles Carmel and charging up San Juan Hill. Dentzel carousel horses Stein & Goldstein, are known for their Horses are probably the favorite animal to ride featured real horsehair on the tails. flowing manes and rose bouquet feaUpwards of 2,000 carousels twirled across the tures. The name derives from the place on a carousel. (Photo by Joe Zentner) United States during their heyday. Classical carwhere these horses once frolicked: the ousels, decked out with sparkling lights, reflecting mirrors and Coney Island, N.Y. amusement park. These are large, passioncolorful painted scenes, are considered by connoisseurs to be ate-appearing animals that have their ears pinned back, nostrils works of art. flaring, eyes wide, and tongues hanging out. Carousels in Idaho. In Athol, north of Coeur d’Alene, at Carved horses done in the Philadelphia Style are the most the Silverwood Theme Park, enthusiasts can ride a 1956 Allan realistic appearing of all carousel creatures. These horses are Herschell model. In Boise, a privately owned classical Armitageso lifelike they look like they could enter an actual race and compete head-to-head against live horses. From the veins carved Herschell Carousel spins people around, while in Idaho Falls, at Funland Park, carousel lovers can get their kicks on a 1947 Allan into perfectly shaped heads, to the careful positioning of each Herschell model, and in Rexburg, at Porter Park, a 1926 Spillwell-formed leg, the wooden reproductions (of the Philadelphia man Engineering Carousel offers rides to enthusiasts. style) do indeed mimic real animals. Natural poses capture the What do you get when you combine art with science and toss of a mane or a powerful gallop with the faithfulness of a make them go round and round for hours of fun? Carousels! In stop-action camera. If it were possible, the carvers likely would have added the smell of the stable and a high-pitched whinny to this age of hyper-reality video games and other computerized recreational diversions, merry-go-rounds seem quaint. While the their creations. figures do at times kick up their hooves and bare their teeth, they Some antique carousels are considered artistic masterpieces, go at a gentle pace. n exhibiting intricate hand-carved figures and original paintings. Carousels built by the William Dentzel Co. of Philadelphia, in Joe Zentner is a retired professor and freelance writer, as well as a longtime particular, are considered classical in form. carousel enthusiast. Articles written by him have appeared in both regional Dentzel’s father, Gustav, arrived in the United States from and national magazines. Germany in 1860 and opened a cabinet shop in Philadelphia.

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Idaho Family Magazine | October 2016 21


Manic Mothering

Mom gets case of exchange student blues By Beth Markley

A

10-2016

little over a month or so ago, I was lying in bed, at o’dark something-or-other, trying to clear my head. “You’re awake aren’t you?” Mike said. Yup. We haven’t been getting a lot of sleep around here. We went out to the living room and Jack was there, on the couch with a quilt, scrolling through his phone. He’d been up all night cleaning and sorting, and now his room was too empty to sleep in. Recently, he took his 50-lb. suitcase, a file Beth Markley of instructions and itineraries, 200 potato pins, and a book about his life in Idaho we’d made for him to show his host families while he’s on exchange, and boarded a plane. We’ll next see him again in person in about 10 months. People have been asking us how we’re dealing with his departure, and for the most part I’ve been Scarlett O’Hara-ing the whole thing, saying that I’d think about that tomorrow. Well, today is “tomorrow,” and I’m still not actually sure what I’m thinking. I’m mostly kind of stunned. And I’ve been here and watched him turn into an almost grown-up, so I don’t have a right to be. It must be some sort of trick of perception, or maybe a sign I’m getting old that has compressed this whole parenting thing into three distinct stages: Stage one: Someone’s ALWAYS touching me, or crawling into bed with me, or following me into the bathroom, or yelling “mom, watch this!” while I feign interest. There are also intervals of heartstring-tugging cuteness and photo ops and first-time evers. … And throughout the whole thing there’s more poop than anyone could ever have imagined. Stage two: The salad days of parenting. And the most fleet-

22 October 2016 | Idaho Family Magazine

ing. The kid’s capable of a little independence, but still unable to drive. Gone are the expensive babysitters and the anxiety that someone will choke on a random Lego. Modesty sets in and I’m no longer followed into the bathroom. Everyone can be relied upon to wear pants when it’s appropriate. More or less. Stage three: The emotions. The hormones. The grandiose plans. The procrastinating. A simple “how are you” on any given day could result in a long conversation or a “why are you always on my case?” Oh, and “can I take the car?” And then, just like that, poof. They’re gone. And I’m just standing here with a very vivid memory of that feeling we had when we brought him home from the hospital: “This whole baby thing is nice and all, but when are this kid’s parents going to take him off our hands?” So, now he’s in the “poof ” stage and I’m feel like we only just survived Stage One, where someone’s hanging off me like a conjoined twin. When I’m old and infirm and can’t remember anything else, Stage One, to my recollection, will be the sum total of my parenting experience. Of course, we’ll miss him. If he’s doing well, he won’t call for weeks, other than to tell us he made it. The thought that tomorrow he won’t be here is a smack upside the head and then a hollowness right in my gut. But it’s more than that. I’m anxious. Will he behave? Will he fall in with a good group of people who will bring out his best, or a bunch of hooligans who’ll send him home tattooed and surly? Will his host family be patient? Will he be diligent in his Danish, or let people practice English on him enough that he never becomes fluent? Will he miss us so much he can’t cope, or return home exasperated with our pedestrian ways? He’ll still be ours, but he won’t be the same. A little while ago, we found a note in his passport holder that said: “When you leave the U.S.: • don’t cry in front of our parents • don’t let them worry about you Someone must have put it there when we sent him to the Danish consulate in June to get his Visa. For weeks he and I had been jabbing each other about the day he would leave: “You’re going to lose it in the airport.” “Well, you’re going to be a big puddle of goo.” “You’re going to cry so hard you can’t breathe.” “We’ll have to call you a WHAA-mbulance.” Whatever. He and I are both criers and we know it. His brother and dad, meanwhile, have some sort of anti-cry superpower. We wonder if they’re alien sometimes. There’s a thing the note writer probably didn’t know. If you’re a crier, you can’t just turn it on and off at will. If you tamp it down, it’ll turn into an ugly cry and then people will stop and stare at you like you just grew horns or something. Well, he managed not to cry, which is more than I can say for myself. At least it wasn’t ugly. I don’t even try. n Beth Markley is a humor writer and fundraising consultant who lives in Boise with her husband and two sons. She publishes weekly stories about her misadventures in parenting in her blog, Manic Mumblings of a Mediocre Mom at www.manicmumbling.com.

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