WEDDING PLANNER
2013
Discount Furniture Center
Faye Maynard Newell showing the soon-to-be married couple, Kimberly Church and Matt Steed, a huge selection of beautiful Dining Room Sets.
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WEDDING ADVICE:
BE OPEN TO EXPERTISE
O
nce you announce your plans to get married, there’s a good chance that people close to you will be ready and willing to dispense their share of advice. Some words of wisdom will be priceless, while others you can store away for another day. When polling married couples, you will likely find they would change “this” or “that” about their weddings if given the chance to do it all over again. Here is some Well-intended advice could be an advice that you can choose to fol- asset when planning a wedding. low for your wedding day. When deciding on par ticular aspects of the wedding, you can give your general ideas, but leave Trust your vendors the finished product to the profesCouples often have unique sionals. Don’t list every song you ideas for their wedding day. It may want the deejay to play or microseem tempting to spell out what manage all of the poses the phoyou want in minute detail and insist tographer should take. After all, on wedding vendors carrying out experienced pros have likely done your wishes to a T. But the smarter this dozens of times in the past and idea may be to give vendors a little could produce results you never more free reign — after all, they dreamed possible. are the professionals. “I had a vision in my head of what I wanted my centerpieces to look like,” offers Jean M., Conn. “I gave the florist my suggestions and the ‘feel’ of what I was trying to create, but ultimately I left the finished product up to her. When I walked into the reception hall and saw my centerpiece baskets overflowing with fall-hued flowers, berries and twinkling candles, I was so excited I had left it up to the expert.”
Scale down Unless you are planning on auditioning for the show “Overthe-Top Weddings,” it might pay to make your wedding more about being personal and less about wowing the crowd with special effects and expensive treats. It’s easy to be lured into extra dinner courses or be persuaded to release
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SEE ADVISE/PAGE 39
Kimberly Church and Matt Steed browse Dot’s Hallmark with Bobby Tippett to help them choose the right Wedding Gifts for their upcoming wedding.
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ROLES OF THE BEST MAN AND MAID OF HONOR eing chosen as a best man or a B maid of honor is a significant and meaningful honor. Those roles have
eymoon site or to come along to book the trip. • Wedding day — On the day of the wedding, the maid of honor and the best man will act as a support system for the bride and groom. The maid of honor will help the bride get dressed and help iron out any miniemergencies that should crop up. The best man will help ensure all of the ushers are dressed and get the groom to the wedding on time. During the ceremony, the maid of honor will hold the bride’s bouquet while she participates in the wedding. The best man will keep the rings safe until they are needed. The maid of honor also will help adjust the bride’s train and veil as she sits and stands during the ceremony. Both will sign the marriage certificate as witnesses. At the reception, the best man is expected to give a toast and the maid of honor may share some words as well. She also may accompany the bride to the restroom and assist her with managing the gown. • After the wedding — The best man will be in charge of returning the tuxedoes to the rental shop, if necessary. He also may drive the newly married couple to the airport so they can depart on their honeymoon. The maid of honor will assist the bride in changing out of her gown and into her travel clothes. Oftentimes the maid of honor takes the gown to the cleaners in the days following the ceremony so the dress can be preserved.
evolved over the years, but these special participants must still perform some of the traditional duties of the past, including serving as the official witnesses to the ceremony. The following is a rundown of the various duties maids of honor and best men are now expected to handle once they’re chosen for these distinguished honors. • Prior to the wedding — Before the wedding takes place, the maid of honor will closely assist the bride-tobe with many of the important decisions related to the look and the feel of the wedding. She typically accompanies the bride to dress shops to select gowns for the bride and bridesmaids. Much in the same manner, the best man will assist the groomto-be with choosing tuxedoes or suits and also with coordinating with the ushers to ensure they know when to go for fittings. The maid of honor may be asked to delegate certain assignments, such as helping to find wedding vendors or addressing invitations. She may go with the bride for makeup and hairstyle trials. Together with the bridesmaids, she will plan a bridal shower party and a bachelorette excursion. She may select a wedding gift for the couple and present it on behalf of all the wedding attendants. The best man will coordinate the bachelor party and may be asked to assist the groom with selecting a hon-
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BRIDESMAIDS: FIND A GOWN THEY ALL WILL LOVE
C
are cer tain dress shapes that are universally flattering, such as A-line. Tr y to avoid gowns that are extremely form-fitting, as only a few of the bridesmaids may be able to pull off this look successfully.
lose friends and family members are an impor tant component of a couple’s wedding day. Individuals who are especially close to the bride and groom are often asked to become members of the wedding party, which means a bride-to-be will be asking one or more women to play an integral role in the celebration. To set these ladies apar t from other guests at the wedding, they are often asked to wear coor dinating bridesmaid gowns. Selecting a style and color that is fitting to the unique people of the bridal party can be challenging, but it’s not impossible. As if choosing your maid of honor wasn’t tricky enough, you now must make a host of other decisions as well, all while playing stylist to the wedding party. Fashion sense is as unique as a fingerprint, and it is unlikely the bridesmaids will be able to agree on every aspect of the gowns they will be asked to wear. However, there are ways to narrow down the choices and be as accommodating as possible to their needs.
Flattering color As a bride you may have a colorscape in your mind for the wedding. But what looks good in table linens and flowers is not always the right choice for clothing. Take the skin tones and hair colors of your bridesmaids into consideration before choosing a dress. Green- and yellow-hued dresses may not look nice on women with olive skin tones, while ver y pale colors may wash out women with fair skin. Those with dark skin may need a brighter-colored dress.
Price tag It is an honor to be asked to be part of a bridal party, but that honor can be ver y expensive. The bridesmaids are expected to pay for their wardrobe, hair styling, and makeup, as well as parties and gifts for the happy couple. As a courtesy to the women who already will be investing a considerable amount to be a part of your wedding, make ever y ef for t to select a gown that is affordable.
Size matters The body shapes and sizes of the women in your bridal par ty will be different, and this should be kept in mind when selecting a gown style and cut. There
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A little patience can help a bride-to-be select bridesmaid gowns that are flattering to all the members of her bridal party. let the bridesmaids choose the style they like the best for themselves. The look will still be cohesive, but it won’t be boring with one type of gown. • Go with a tea-length gown. These gowns have become quite trendy and are less formal and cumbersome than full-length gowns. Plus, there is a greater likelihood that the gown can be used again at a later date. • Purchase the bridesmaid gowns at the same store where you will be purchasing your wedding gown. Most shops will offer a courtesy discount if the bridesmaid gowns are purchased at the same store. Ensuring bridesmaids ar e happy in their gowns takes a little work but will be well wor th the effort.
Other tips Once you’ve decided on the basic elements, consider the following suggestions to find a gown that the bridal par ty will enjoy. • Take one or two bridesmaids shopping with you. Tr y to select ones with opposite body types so you can see how the gown looks on a woman who is thin and one who may be more full-figured. • Think about choosing separates. The bridesmaids can mix and match tops and bottoms to find a fit that works. This may enable a woman with a larger bust size to select a top with suppor tive straps while another bridesmaid can opt for strapless. • Choose one color and then
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MAKE THE MOST OF A RAINY-DAY WEDDING
hen a couple envisions their W ideal wedding day, rain rarely comes into the picture. Unless a
Brides understandably fear their wedding dress won’t survive a soggy ceremony. To reduce the gown’s exposure to rain, brides should consider getting dressed at the venue. This means they will only have to wear the dress outside during the actual ceremony. Wrap the gown and other accessories including shoes, in plastic to keep them safe from rain and mud. If the wedding is slated for later in the day, call the venue and determine how early the wedding parties can arrive and how much space will be provided for the party to get dressed. This won’t be too big an issue for the groom and his groomsmen, but the bride and her bridal party will likely want to get there several hours in advance of the ceremony. • Wear waterproof makeup. Brides-to-be should wear waterproof makeup. In addition, bring a collection of items, including hairspray and extra makeup, that can help combat the elements. • Prepare the ushers. Ushers will need to be extra diligent during a rainy ceremony. Instruct the ushers before guests begin to arrive that their roles have taken on greater importance thanks to the weather. Ushers should keep an eye out and an umbrella open for arriving guests, escorting guests to their seats under a cloak of dryness. Once the happy couple has said their “I dos” and all the guests have managed to stay dry, the bride and groom should offer some special thanks to the ushers who helped keep everyone dry.
couple likes things soggy, chances are rain on the big day will be a bit of a disappointment. While there’s no way couples can keep it from raining on their wedding days, there are ways to prevent rain from ruining the ceremony and the ensuing festivities. • Have a contingency plan in place well. Weather is unpredictable, but couples who choose an outdoor wedding should begin making a contingency plan well in advance of the wedding. This doesn’t mean couples need to plan two weddings, they just need to discuss with vendors what the plan of action is going to be should rain arrive. When booking a venue, discuss with the venue manager what the venue can do if it rains. Many venues will set up a tent and have an umbrella station for arriving guests. When getting married outdoors, choose a venue that’s both idyllic and capable of handling a wet wedding. It’s best to also have a contingency photography plan in place as well. When choosing a photographer, ask about his or her history with rainy weddings. Find out if the photographer has an indoor studio where portraits can be taken if the conditions outside are not ideal. Or, maybe he or she is familiar with the reception site and knows a few areas that would make good backdrops. • Get dressed at the venue.
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HENDERSON APPLIANCE CENTER... Can Fill Your New Home With Brand Name Appliances Barbara Young assisting the soon-to-be married couple Kimberly Church and Matt Steed with appliances and bedding for their new home
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A masquerade theme might be an entertaining theme for a couple's nuptials.
WEDDING THEMES CAN ADD UP TO EXTRA FUN very couple wants their wedding to be memorable. The goal of E planning a wedding is to create
an experience that everyone will remember for years to come. For some couples, a theme wedding is the best way to accomplish just that. When it comes time to select a theme, the day the wedding takes place may dictate the theme. For example, if the wedding takes place on Halloween, the ideas for the theme are easy. Many other couples choose a theme that highlights a specific interest or hobby or something that is dear to them. Here are some popular wedding themes. • Holiday: The Christmas season lends itself well to wedding plan-
ning. The colors (red, green, gold) are already established, and most churches and buildings are already decked out in holiday finery, cutting down on the amount of flowers and embellishments couples need. Because the holiday season is so busy and a popular time for socializing, couples who want to tie the knot during this time of year should send save-the-date cards well in advance. • Vegas: Couples who want to tie the knot in Las Vegas but want to ensure all their loved ones can attend can recreate the magic of Vegas wherever they may be. Casino-inspired games and big buffet
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SEE THEMES/PAGE 37
CHILDREN IN A WEDDING MEANS NO KIDDING AROUND wedding is a joyous event that A couples want to share with as many people as possible. Couples
commonly ask family and friends to take part in the ceremony as ushers, bridesmaids or readers. Before enlisting the help of a child to fill such roles, couples should carefully consider whether a youngster is capable of participating in the wedding ceremony or if he or she may not be up to the task. Millions of people tuned into the British Royal wedding in April of 2011. Among the participants were six young children. The children were as young as three years old and as old as 10. Although the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge were confident enough in the kids’ maturity to include them, reportedly some measures were taken to keep the tots in line. Couples worrying about all the little details of their own weddings may not want to fret about kiddie meltdowns or the bloopers that can occur when kids act like kids. Each child’s personal maturity level should be considered before enlisting their help. There are some other strategies to use as well. • Young children serving as flower girls or ring bearers should be able to walk down the aisle without coaxing. If they cannot handle this task, then they should not be asked to take part in the wedding.
• Should children prove competent to walk down the aisle unattended, couples can have them then make their way to the seats next to their parents, rather than awkwardly standing with the rest of the bridal party for the ceremony. • A minimum age requirement for wedding participants might be a good idea. A child age 5 or up may be able to appreciate the importance of the event. • Consult with the pastor or officiant of the ceremony. The ceremony location may have rules governing children in the ceremony. • All people who have participated in the ceremony will be invited to the reception. If couples decide to have a kids-free party, then reconsider children in the ceremony. • Think about another role for a young child that will not disrupt the proceedings. Perhaps he or she can help hand out birdseed or small bottles of bubbles to use when the couple has finished their vows. Or give children disposable cameras and allow them to capture a kids’-eye view of the wedding. Couples who choose to have children participate in the ceremony have to realize that there is the potential for slip-ups. Keeping an open mind and some patience can make for some memorable moments and possibly even a little humor.
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Young children serving as flower girls or ring bearers should be able to walk down the aisle without coaxing. If they cannot handle this task, then they should not be asked to take part in the wedding.
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Kimberly Church and Matt Steed gather information to send their out of town guests.
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ORIGINS OF BRIDAL CUSTOMS C
hances are those who have attended a wedding have witnessed some popular traditions take place. The bride wears a veil, a court of wedding attendants accompanies the bride and groom, and birdseed, rice or flower petals are tossed. But have you ever wondered why? The wedding customs are ripe with tradition and harken back to days when superstition and myth often ruled the day. • T h r o w i n g r i c e : To d a y it has become de rigueur to blow bubbles, toss birdseed or release doves when the bride and groom leave the house of worship newly betrothed. That’s because savvy individuals found that raw rice can pose a hazard to birds pecking in the area. However, rice throwing is an old custom that dates back to the Middle Ages, when wheat or rice where thrown to symbolize fertility for the couple. • Bouquet: Nowadays, the bride car ries a beautiful bouquet of flowers. But the purpose of the bouquet held dif ferent meanings in the past. Saracen brides car ried orange blossoms for fer tility. Others carried a combination of herbs and
A wedding cake once symbolized fertility for the happy couple. flowers to ward of f evil spirits with their aroma. Bouquets of dill were often carried, again for fer tility reasons, and after the ceremony, the dill was eaten to encourage lust. • Bridesmaids: There may be arguments over dresses and how many bridesmaids to have in a wedding par ty now, but in ancient times it was “the more the mer rier.” That’s because bridesmaids were another measur e to keep the bride safe against evil spirits. Essentially the bridesmaids were decoys for the spirits — dressing like the bride to confuse the spirits or maybe help deter them to leave the bride be.
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SEE CUSTOMS/PAGE 37
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Writing one's wedding vows may not be a simple task. That's because you want the message conveyed to be dear to your heart. That can be a challenge when facing the pressures and planning for the rest of the arrangements.
TIPS FOR WRITING YOUR OWN WEDDING VOWS A wedding is a once-in-a-lifetime event for many couples, so brides and grooms wish for the event to be momentous and memorable. As such, couples are increasingly integrating personal nuances into their ceremonies and receptions to tailor weddings to their unique visions. The desire to include personalized wedding vows continues to be a popular trend. Here are some guidelines for personalizing your ceremony with your own sentiments. • Schedule time for writing. Amid the bustle of dress fittings and interviews with photographers, it can be easy to put off the important task of writing vows for another day. But as any great writer can attest, it
takes writing — and rewriting — to achieve a finished product you can be proud of. Give the task of writing your vows your undivided attention. Mark it in on your calendar or set a reminder on your computer just as you would any other appointment. • Be aware of ceremony guidelines. It is best to check with your officiant and confirm that personalized wedding vows are allowed. During civil ceremonies it’s often acceptable to customize vows as you see fit. However, during religious ceremonies there may be lines of scripture that need to be read or certain passages required. Before you spend hours working on the task, be
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SEE VOWS/PAGE 35
CUISINE VARIETY ROCKS THE RECEPTION W
eddings are a celebration wherein guests look forward to the reception as much as the actual ceremony, and the food served at the wedding is often hotly anticipated. Wedding receptions feature a bevy of different foods to tempt the palates of those in attendance. From appetizers served during the cocktail hour to the last crumb of cake, food plays a big role in a wedding reception. Choosing foods for a reception can take a little forethought, especially when the wedding party is especially large. The following are a few suggestions to ensure most guests are happy with the menu selections. The first rule of thumb is variety. As much as budget allows, give guests the choice over what they dine on. During the cocktail hour — if there is one — couples can play with many different tastes and offerings. For those who want to be creative, this is the time to do so. Exotic flavors can be served alongside more traditional offerings that guests recognize. For example, offer Asian fusion appetizers that may have spice alongside more traditional items, like miniature quiches. During the main course of the meal, give guests a few options. Most catering facilities will offer suggestions in their meal packages. Couples can typically choose to offer a meat dish, a poultry and a seafood. This caters to a wide variety of din-
ers. It is important for couples to recognize that many people have food allergies or are on restricted diets. While it may not be possible to provide for everyone’s specific requirements, it is possible to make some accommodations First, ask the catering manager how his company provides for guests who are vegetarians or vegans. Ensure that the meal will not be simply a bunch of garnishes and vegetable side dishes lumped together. In addition, couples should recognize that many people have now adopted gluten-free lifestyles. More and more restaurants and establishments have expanded their offerings to include gluten-free items, so it is important for the bride and groom to confirm. People who are diabetic and must limit their consumption of sugars and carbohydrates may appreciate a selection of sugar-free desserts or lower carbohydrate foods. When couples focus on meeting the needs of their guests, it shows they have put in the effort to make everyone feel welcome and comfortable at the wedding. Couples who have the environment in mind can choose to serve organic foods and look to catering facilities that purchase foods from local vendors and farms. If a banquet hall does not make such concessions, ask if specialty items that benefit organic and local food
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The first rule of thumb for the reception is variety. As much as budget allows, give guests the choice over what they dine on. producers can be brought in. Some caterers will be happy to make the change, but it will likely affect the cost of the wedding package to do so. Food and drink will be some of the most costly portions of a wedding, and couples who are interested in keeping costs down can still offer quality foods if they make some changes. Varying the time of day that the wedding is held can enable a brunch or luncheon wedding to take place. These foods are often less expensive and labor-intensive to prepare, and therefore the cost savings are passed down to the
bride and groom. Some couples opt for a cocktail and hors d’oeuvre-only reception — which should clearly be indicated on the invitation so that guests can plan accordingly. An informal wedding may feature only a selection of desserts and specialty liquors. This may be the least expensive option. Food is an important factor at a wedding and it is in a couple’s best interest to ensure that the food served is tasty, full of variety and acceptable to the majority of the guests who will be attending the reception.
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UNIQUE RECEPTION TIPS Over the course of their life- with guests during the cocktimes, many people will be wedding tail hour means you don’t have guests on several occasions. Dur- to make that big entrance from ing the height of wedding season, behind closed doors. Guests will weddings can run into one another, have all eyes on you when you step as the format and the festivities on the dance floor for your first are similar at various ceremonies. dance together. • Dance to an upbeat number. Couples interested in setting their nuptials apart may want to enhance Guests are expecting a slow, sappy the wedding reception with a few tune. What they may not expect is an upbeat song that shows you unique ideas. Who hasn’t attended a wedding are willing to have a little fun. If you haven’t mastered that seems formulaic? the waltz but enjoy a The couple enters, little quick step now they do their spotlight While it is often and again, feel free dance, there’s food, customary and to choose a tune that a bouquet toss and easy to follow shows your excitethen the cake cutting. tradition, that ment and love for each Guests may actually be other. able to predict what’s doesn’t mean you • Encourage coming next. While it cannot buck with is often customary and tradition and offer c o u p l e s t o d a n c e It’s often easy to follow tradition, a few creative ideas together. customar y for the that doesn’t mean you cannot buck with tra- to make your event bridal party to join the bride and groom on dition and offer a few stand out. the dance floor midcreative ideas to make way through the first your event stand out. Here are several ideas you can dance. However, that leaves spousintroduce into your wedding to add es or significant others waiting in something special to the reception. the wings while their dates tango • Skip the big entrance. Those with groomsmen or bridesmaids. who were kind enough to attend Instead, don’t have assigned partthe ceremony have already been ners. Rather, encourage your bridintroduced to the newly minted al party members to dance with happy couple. Instead of spending whomever they choose. the cocktail hour in the isolation • Swap the garter/bouquet toss of the wedding suite, mingle with for something more meaningful. your guests from start to finish. If you’re part of a couple who feels So much time is spent posing for the garter and bouquet toss has pictures or being out of touch with become trite, there are other ways guests, the cocktail hour can be a to create special moments in your great time to sit and chat. Being celebration — ones that don’t sin-
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gle out the singletons who haven’t yet found their special someones. Use this time to present a small gift or token of your affection to someone on the guest list who has served as a mentor or source of inspiration. • Choose one special component as an extra goodie for guests. Some couples feel the more they offer the better guests will view their wedding. Spending more money doesn’t necessarily mean guests will have a better time. If you want to go above and beyond the ordinary, find one thing that you absolutely love and offer that at the party. It could be a flambe presentation, a chocolate or candy bar, a carving station with your alltime favorite food (even if that’s PB&J), or a carnival-inspired automatic photo booth. • Hir e a live per for mer. Although it’s hard to beat the performance quality of your wedding song being performed by the original artist, unless you’re cousins with Celine Dion, chances are she won’t be available to sing “My Heart Will Go On” at your reception. However, a live band adds a certain level of excitement that a disk jockey may not be able to provide. Those who are adding a cultural or ethnic component to their wedding may want to hire a dance troupe or another type of performer, like a bagpiper, as an added measure of entertainment for guests. • Let them eat ... cookies? Some people just don’t like cake. Therefore, why should a couple have to cut a seven-tiered white confection? Towers of dif ferent types of treats can be created from just
Use the bouquets of the bridal party as the centerpieces of some of the reception tables as one way to bring something different to your wedding. about anything and serve as the perfect backdrop for that classic cake-cutting photo. A pyramid of cream puffs, stacks of brownies, a cookie castle, or cereal-cake concoctions can work. Some bakeries will decorate a “dummy” styrofoam cake, and then you can serve apple pie a la mode, if you desire. • Stage a costume switch. Let’s face it, dancing all night in a long gown takes some stamina. As the bride, have a more comfortable cocktail dress available to switch into for the latter part of the reception. It will also add some variety to your wedding photos.
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Thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no hurry...
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QUALITY | EXPERTISE | COMMITMENT 24
HONEYMOON HOW-TO
A
fter the thrill of wedding festivities dies down, couples often jet of f to a honeymoon retreat and begin an entirely dif ferent adventure. The honeymoon may create mixed feelings, some concerning the chance to spend time alone after months of planning and a few feelings of anxiety over spending the first night together as a married couple. For many couples, the honeymoon wedding night is the first time they are intimate together or it holds a special meaning of being intimate for the first time after being married. Such significance can put pressure on a happy and natural experience. Wedding jitters are normal, as are honeymoon and wedding night jitters. But just as wedding trends have changed through the years, so, too, have beliefs about the wedding night. Knowing about shifting trends can alleviate some of the nervousness. According to a recent survey from Brides magazine, one in three brides plan to get into bed on the wedding night and ... sleep. After all of the hoopla of planning and enjoying the wedding, most people are exhausted. Others say they plan to stay up and relive moments of the day. Only about half of all couples think they will consummate the marriage on their wedding night. Taking the pressure off of the wedding night means that the rest of the honeymoon may be filled with oppor tunities to be
amorous. But couples may still be filled with expectations for the perfect romantic retreat. Here are some things to think about. • Accept the fact that some wedding nights and honeymoons aren’t exactly what’s pictured in the movies. Don’t tr y to live up to a Hollywood-inspired ideal or you may be let down when things don’t go your way. In other words, it may rain on your beachside liaison. • A wedding requires a lot of work. Many people find themselves to be physically exhausted afterward. Others find they are so wound up that they cannot relax. When the mind or body is on adrenaline overload or completely wiped out, it’s not the ideal situation for romantic endeavors. • Try to make the honeymoon stand apart from other nights by packing nice lingerie or nighttime attire so that the memories will be special. There will be plenty of other times down the road when you’re an old, married couple to hop between the sheets in a ratty college T-shirt. • Pack some candles and mood music, or ask the resor t to handle these details for you. These items can help set the scene. • Make sure your packing list includes special toiletries and bir th control methods if you’re not ready to start a family so soon after being married. The brands you prefer may be hard to acquire while at some honeymoon locations.
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WHAT TO LOOK FOR IN A RECEPTION VENUE ngaged couples must make E assorted important decisions with regards to their wedding day.
For some, the process of planning a wedding can be overwhelming, while others revel in each and every decision. Among the many decisions couples must make is which venue to use for their reception. The wedding reception venue is where most of the day will be spent, and where the majority of the people will do their mingling. When looking for a wedding venue, there are a number factors to take into consideration. • The accommodations — The facility itself should be able to accommodate the wedding size. Some weddings are grandiose events with large guests lists, while others are more understated and intimate, with only a small number of family and friends in attendance. Couples should know which type of wedding they will be having, and should have at least an estimate figure in mind of the number of guests before visiting any facilities. Once that estimate has been made, look for a facility that can comfort-
Couples must consider a host of factors when choosing a reception venue for their wedding. ably accommodate that number of people, and ideally find one that has a done so in the past. Couples won’t want a facility where everyone is crammed together, nor will they want one where a relatively small number of guests are in a large ballroom with lots of empty space. • The date — Couples may choose the date of their wedding based on the availability of a church they attend or a specific wedding officiant they want to perform their ceremony. Once that date has been chosen, it’s time to look for a reception venue. Couples who have a specific venue in mind might want to ask about the venue’s availability before settling on a wedding date. When seeking out a reception venue, ask if the venue has any other events scheduled for that day.
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SEE VENUE/PAGE 35
SMALLER, INTIMATE WEDDING ADVANTAGES
wedding doesn’t have to be a A mammoth event with 300 guests and a costly price tag. Many couples
choose to walk down the aisle and then celebrate on a smaller scale with much success. Millions of weddings take place across the globe every year. According to the Association for Bridal Consultants, the average American wedding includes 175 guests, and the average size of the wedding party is 12 people. Many couples may view these averages and feel pressured to throw a big wedding. But smaller events can be just as much fun and easier on the pocketbook as well. One of the more obvious advantages to a small wedding is the cost. Many large weddings cost between $20,000 and $30,000 dollars. A small wedding will be significantly less simply because there are fewer people to feed. Catering costs account for a large chunk of wedding budgets. A reception with only 50 to 60 people may run $1,000 or less. Another benefit to a smaller wedding is a couple may be able to afford a higher-priced venue. Maybe there’s that historic castle or high-priced mansion that would be over budget if 200 guests were coming. With a much smaller guest list, the venue might now be affordable. Or, couples can look outside of wedding halls to restaurants for a nice dinner. Small weddings tend to be more intimate. Couples can spend more individual time with guests instead of having to spread their time thinly
around a large reception hall. Special moments, such as speeches or words of wisdom, may bear more significance when the group is intimate. Destination weddings have become quite popular and are most successful with a small group. Keeping a large guest list in order can prove challenging when traveling, which makes destination weddings ideal for small guest lists. Also, costs will be kept down if the couple is paying the travel fees for invitees. It’s important for couples to keep in mind that a small wedding is not without certain challenges. Family members and friends may have their own perceptions of what a wedding should be. Once the idea of a small wedding is mentioned, it may be met with some opposition, particularly from parents who want to invite an extended list of friends and distant family members. This can make it difficult to pick and choose who to invite. Another disadvantage is that large weddings evoke the energy of a big party and can make people less inhibited to celebrate and dance. An empty dance floor at a smaller wedding may be intimidating to guests who will choose to sit and not fully enjoy themselves. Ultimately, the decision to have a small-, medium- or large-size wedding is entirely up to the couple or the person who will be financing the event. Wedding planning is largely the personal choice of the couple who will be saying their “I dos.”
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WEDDING CAKE TRENDS T
he multi-tiered cake that is a favorite wedding tradition that’s often presented at the end of the night. The happy couple takes a slice and enjoys the first piece. In recent years, wedding cakes have become more of an ar tistic centerpiece than just a confectionary treat. Couples often seek out renowned wedding cake bakers for a cake that will amaze the crowd and complete the theme of the wedding. The average couple will spend between $700 to $800 for their wedding cake. Although many catering halls or reception sites will include the wedding cake in a package deal, many couples choose to order their cake from a specialty bakery who creates culinary masterpieces. If television trends are any indication, many people are opting to spend several hundred to thousands of dollars on a customized wedding cake. These fondant and buttercream creations may be elaborate in nature, so much so they’ll likely need to be ordered several months in advance. Couples looking for something a bit different for their upcoming nuptials, many want to consider these trends in wedding cakes. • 3-D accents on the cake, such as graphic appliques. • A black-and-white motif that gives the cake a simplistic, yet trendy appeal. • A lot of bold color in the cake, instead of just white or
Black-and-white wedding cakes are one theme that couples routinely turn to for their dramatic flair and aesthetic appeal. ivory. • Dramatic monograms that can add class to the cake. • Painted cakes with edible food coloring paint that feature beautiful landscapes or a portrait. A work of art, they’re both delicious to eat and fun to admire. • Cakes that mirror the style of the wedding gown, including fondant ruffles and appliques. Many couples still opt for the traditional, and that is always in style. Instead of experimenting with the outside of the cake, couples can be creative with cake flavor and fillings. Imagine cutting open the cake to find red velvet or a chocolate ganache filling!
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DIY WEDDINGS hose thinking about tying the T knot in the months to come may be discouraged by how expensive
weddings can be. But with a little ingenuity and a hands-on approach, couples can have a wedding that is inexpensive and memorable at the same time. According to CostofWedding. com, on average, U.S. couples spend $26,542 for their weddings. Weddingbells magazine states that the average cost for a wedding in Canada is $23,330, up from $20,129 in 2010. These amounts do not include the cost for an engagement ring or wedding bands. With such a high price tag, some couples may wonder if they can afford their dream wedding or if there are ways to cut costs. Having a backyard, DIY wedding can be the answer. Although some may envision a backyard wedding with picnic benches and Dad at the grill, it can be a much classier affair than that. Smart couples are realizing that the money they would normally spend on a big wedding at an outside venue can be put to better use, either through buying a new home or fixing up one they may already own. Furthermore, for couples who are picky about details, having a DIY event ensures that they can control the details and have them as personal as they would like.
saved with sweat equity can be substantial. A well-planned wedding is the best start. Grab a notebook and start making lists of all the things you will need: • location • tables and chairs • linens • food • silverware and glassware • invitations • photography • music • officiant • music • centerpieces and other decor • cake or dessert • lighting • attire • flowers
Work in advance
Many items necessary for a wedding can be bought in advance. Some couples find that purchasing low-cost items at discount stores turns out to be less expensive than renting. For example, inexpensive glasses and silverware can be bought at dollar stores or chains like Ikea. Later on these items can be kept, sold or even donated to shelters. Tablecloths don’t have to be the traditional kind. It may be less expensive to purchase pieces of fabGetting started ric from a fabric store and dressing them up oneself. Candles can be A DIY wedding is one that will stockpiled relatively easy and protake much more work than sim- vide a very affordable means of ply hiring vendors and leaving the details to them. But the money SEE DIY/PAGE 33
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DIY FROM PAGE 31
ambient light. Plan out centerpiece ideas and figure out which components can be bought and stored. Then items can be assembled at leisure. Wedding stationery is one thing that will have to be bought well in advance so there will be time enough to printout save-the-dates, invitations and response cards, as well as mail them. An informal wedding may mean couples can get simple attire. Buying off the rack may mean a smaller price tag for gowns. Gentleman may be able to fare with sportcoats and slacks. Purchase wardrobe essentials several months in advance to be sure there will be time for alterations, if necessary. Enlist the help of family and friends to get many of the tasks completed. Upon asking, many couples find there are members of the family who have skills in certain areas, which can be tapped for the wedding. There may be a gourmet chef, a disc jockey, a photographer or even someone who can officiate the vows. Having these people on board means a great reduction in costs.
Readying the venue Because couples will be doing the work themselves, it’s best to start several days in advance of the wedding (weather permitting). Be sure the grounds are well groomed and landscaped. Ensure there are no tripping hazards and that there is a sturdy surface for placing tables or creating a dance floor.
It may pay to ask an electrician or someone who dabbles in electric work to help string some lights to better illuminate the area, especially for when the sun goes down. Set up the tables and chairs to finalize placement the day before. Figure out where the ceremony will take place. One splurge couples may want to make is hiring a waitstaff to help set up food service areas, serve as bartenders and clear away dishes and other messes. This way the bride and groom can mingle with guests.
Other tips and tricks Here are some other ways to save money on DIY weddings. • Fruit is less expensive than flowers for centerpieces. • Include postcard response cards in wedding invites. The postage is less, and you don’t have to spend money on an extra envelope. • Be sure to check with your town if you need a permit or variance for having so many cars parked by the house in the event of a backyard wedding. Otherwise you could be facing a fine. • Many dif ferent foods can be cooked in advance and frozen instead of hiring a catering service. • Consider favors that also double as table centerpieces. • Bouquets can easily be made with store-bought flowers, some floral tape and decorative ribbon. • Restrict the bar to wine and beer, and you’ll save money on expensive liquors. A DIY wedding can be a fun, memorable event that costs a couple a fraction of what it would be to have it held at an expensive location.
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VOWS
FROM PAGE 17
sure that it is allowed and that your spouse and you are on the same page. • Jot down your feelings. Answer some questions about what marriage means to you and how you feel about your spouse. Think about what is the most important thing you want to promise to your future partner. • Read inspirational writings. Perhaps there is an author or a poet who inspires you? You can quote certain writers in your vows or let the tone of their works help shape the words of your vows. • Establish an outline. Put together all of the words and phrases you’ve jotted down into an outline to help you organize the flow of the
VENUE
FROM PAGE 27
• The location — The facility’s location should be a priority. Couples won’t want their guests to have to drive too far from the wedding ceremony to the reception venue or from the reception venue back to the hotel. Since many wedding guests come from out of town, they likely won’t know the area well and could get lost if the facility is too far away from their hotel. Keep things simple by finding a reception venue that’s close to the hotel or hotels where guests will be staying. • The hours — Couples who want their receptions to last into the wee hours should inquire about the
vows, using these words as a blueprint for the vows and building upon them. Make sure the vows will be concise. Aim for your entire speech to be around 1 minute in length to keep everyone engaged and the ceremony moving along. • Put everything together. Draft your vows and then practice them by reading out loud. You want to avoid long sentences or anything that trips you up. Although large words may sound impressive, they could make the vows seem too academic and not necessarily heartfelt. Enlist the help of a friend or two to act as your audience to see if the vows sound good and are easily understandable. Public speaking is seldom easy, nor is finding the perfect words to convey feelings about a future spouse. However, with some practice and inspiration, anyone can draft personalized vows. facility’s hourly rate. A typical reception lasts five or six hours. If couples want to go beyond that, they might have to pay an hourly rate. Ask if the facility charges an hourly rate or if the venue can simply be rented for as long as the party keeps going. • The price — Many facilities offer a flat rate to rent the venue. When discussing the rate, be sure to ask what’s included. Will food, flowers, venue decor, and even staff tips be included in the rental fee? If not, is there room for negotiation? When facilities expand the services they include in their rental fee, that can save couples substantial amounts of money. When choosing a reception venue, couples must consider a host of factors that stretch beyond a venue’s aesthetic appeal.
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tions, couples can include a little television fun into the event. • Fair ytale: Many men and women envision a fair ytale wedding complete with horsedrawn car riage and the “happily ever after.” This is what makes Disney proper ties as well as the various castles around the world popular backdrops for wedding events. • Interest or passion: Fish bowls as centerpieces may call to mind under water adventures, while sur fboard-shaped invites may set the scene for a beachside party. Theme weddings can add an extra spice to the festivities and incorporate couples’ interests into the event — making it even more special.
THEMES
FROM PAGE 11
meals can make guests feel like they have stepped into a casino on the famed Vegas strip. In addition, an Elvis impersonator is essential to a Vegas wedding. • TV show: Some couples elevate certain television shows to cult status. Whether it’s “Friends” or “Star Trek,” popular television shows have been transformed into festive wedding themes. Whether the idea is to go daring and exchange vows in costume or simply name reception tables according to characters or show loca-
CUSTOMS
FROM PAGE 15
• Wedding rings: Wearing of wedding rings dates back to ancient Egypt. The round shape of a ring symbolizes eter nal love. The ring is wor n on the four th finger of the left hand because it is believed this finger has a blood vessel that goes directly to the heart. • Wedding cake: The traditional wedding cake evolved from Roman times when the cake was originally made from wheat. It was broken over the bride’s head to ensure fer tility. All of the guests eat a piece for
good luck. Single women used to place a piece of wedding cake under their pillows in the hopes of finding their own husbands. • Father accompanying the bride: This tradition symbolizes that the bride’s father endorses the choice in husbands and is presenting his daughter as a pure bride to that man. • Kissing the bride: In older times, a kiss symbolized a legal bond. Therefore, the bride and groom kissed to seal the deal on their betrothal. There are many traditions sur rounding a wedding that people simply accept. But understanding their origins can make the ceremony more meaningful.
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Pictured: Katherine Cavanaugh
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ADVICE FROM PAGE 5
doves at the ceremony, but will these extras impact your relationship or the life you will be building together? “If I had to do it all again, I would skip the dessert bar I had at my wedding,” says Alice C., Ohio. “The spread of pies, pastries, cookies, and chocolates certainly looked impressive, but it cost me a small fortune. Also, people filled up on the dessert bar so much, they no longer had room to taste my special-ordered wedding cake.”
Don’t overextend Your wedding will hopefully be a once-in-a-lifetime event. Therefore, couples often plan to spend a good deal of money to ensure their special day is perfect. Weddings are still viewed as a high-priority expense and most couples save for a long period of time despite sluggish consumer spending reports. According to the market research and analysis firm IBISWorld, nearly 60 percent of couples go over their budgets when getting married. Some do so at the risk of being in debt afterward. “It can be easy to get carried away in wedding spending,” shares Deirdre H., Mich. “I went way over budget when getting my wedding gown and a few other components of my wedding. My husband and I struggled the first year of our marriage trying to fix our finances and battling a bad
case of money-related stress.” Tr y to stick to a budget as much as possible so that you can enjoy yourself not only on the wedding day, but also long after the honeymoon has ended.
Keep it in the family Selecting members of your wedding party can be challenging because there may be so many special people in your lives right now that you want to honor. Choosing a best man and a maid/ matron of honor is a large responsibility because these people stand out in the wedding. Although couples struggle with their choices and want to please everyone, your safest bet is to choose a family member. “I ended up choosing my best friend over my sister as maid of honor,” says Clara T., Ariz. “Although we were very close at the time, we’ve since grown apart due to work relocation. My sister and I, however, talk and hang out frequently. I regret not having asked my sister to be my maid of honor, considering hers is a friendship I know will last a long time.” Unless you don’t have close family members or your relationship with your siblings or cousins is strained, choose a family member to serve as best man or maid of honor. It is easy to be over whelmed when planning a wedding, and couples can expect to be bombarded with advice. However, it could pay to heed the advice of couples who have already lived and learned from their wedding choices.
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