I am in shock, I feel confused, I need help, It will get better I will get back on track It will be ok
What will you decide? The choice is yours
BEFORE
Draw how you feel: Acknowledging how you feel will help you work through any choices you have to make. Writing or drawing how you feel may also make it easier to communicate with others about the abortion, this also insures that you stay calm throughout.
Who can you get support from? Any decisions regarding abortion can be hard to make and being able to talk to someone about the different options there are can help you come to a final answer.
Your partner
Family
Friends
If you do not have support avaible or you prefer to go along with making your decisions alone. Then there is advice that is available from the links below: www.fpa.org.uk www.mariestopes.org.uk/women/abortion www.bpas.org
Can you afford a baby? Having a baby can be expensive and up until a certain age, the baby will need your full help financially to live a healthy live style.
PASSPORT
£1, 146 Personal
£3, 434 Furniture
£4, 603 Pocket Money
£7, 486 Leisure
£9, 377 Hobbies/ Toys
£10, 942 Clothing
DAY CARE
£14, 167 Other*
£16, 675 Holidays
£19, 516 Food
£67, 586 Child care
£74, 319 Education
* includes birthdays, driving lessons, first car and Christmas.
Life without a baby: There could be numerous reasons as to why you don’t want a baby. Whatever the reason is, the choice is yours, however have you thought about what you will do after?
Are you saving for a house?
Are you looking to graduate?
Did you want to focus on your job?
Are you looking after someone?
Consider your choices carefully. Talk through all of the methods that are avaibale for you. The processes are very different so try and understand each method as best as you can to be entirely informed.
DURING
What should you discuss with the doctor before the abortion?
Talk through the methods, risks and complications.
START HERE
You will need to go through blood tests and also check if you are anaemic.
In some cases you will need to have an ultrasound and a cervical screening if appropriate.
5
Home You could also be given antibiotics to stop any infections. You may be tested for STIs.
The pill:
HOSPITAL
START HERE You will receive the first abortion pill known as mifepristone.
You will then receive the second pill this is known as prostaglandi.
(This blocks the hormones from
making the lining of the womb suitable for the fertilised egg).
0 - 9 weeks: You are then sent home. (Little bleeding will occur during this time, you may also have cramps).
5
(Your womb lining will break and be lost, along with the embryo, through bleeding from your vagina) (This process can be painfulbut you can take a painkiller).
Vacuum aspiration: START HERE A tablet will be placed inside the vagina a few hours prior to the abortion. (This softens the cervix making it easier to open. Sometimes an alternative tablet is given orally).
HOSPITAL
7 - 15 weeks:
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You are then sent home after the procedure. The whole procedure will takes 10 minutes in total. (A plastic suction tube connected to a pump will then be inserted in to the womb and used to remove the foetus and surrounding tissue).
(After the procedure you will experience bleeding which lasts for up to 21 days. The average bleedings lasts 9/10 days with the bleeding being heavy for 2/3 days. Painkillers can be taken for cramps).
Medical abortion:
START HERE Mifepristone and prostaglandin are given. (This method does take longer, and more than one dose may be given).
A second dose of prostaglandin may be given .
HOSPITAL
9 - 20 weeks:
(However this is discussed with you later if it is necessary. Some cases involve the placenta or afterbirth not passing through. In which case you may require a small operation to remove the placenta).
You may be able to return home on the same day. (However in some cases the hospital will require you to stay over night). in rare cases
5
Surgical dilations and evacuation:
START HERE Surgical dilation and evacuation is a procedure which is carried out under anaesthetics. (Your cervix will be gently stretched and dilated and forceps and a suction tube will be used to remove the foetus and tissue in the womb).
HOSPITAL
from 15 weeks:
The procedure takes 20 minutes to perform and if healthy you can return home on the same day. (The hospital may advise you to stay overnight and you may experience bleeding for up to 21 days).
5
Late abortion:
HOSPITAL
Stay over night
20 - 24 weeks: 1 Stage 1: stop heart beat of foetus and soften cervix. Stage 2: Carried out the following day, involves removing the foetus and the tissue. Both stages are carried out under general anaesthetics.
2 Prostaglandin is injected in to the womb making it contract. Contractions cant last 6 to 12 hours. You will remain awake during the procedure and will be given medication to help the pain. D&E will check that the womb is completely empty.
The support should not end here. Continuing the conversation with a friend/ family member or partner will allow you to stay calm and focus. Alternatively you can talk to someone from your clinic and continue getting some support.
AFTER
Q&A
What will happen now?
Time after the abortion can be very stressful and at times you may not know how to feel. Continuing any support is neccessary as discussing your feelings after can help keep you on track. Sometimes abortion can affect women weeks after treatment. Therefore some women seek therapy to help deal with any after effects for stress to stay calm.
What signs should I look out for?
Unusual signs:
Usual signs:
- If you experience lasting pain.
- Irregular bleeding / spotting for the first 2 weeks.
- Discoloured or smelly vaginal discharge. - Abdominal tenderness - Fever - Feeling of being unwell - Heavy bleeding that soaks 2 or more sanitary towels in an 1/2 hours in a row.
- Experience cramping for the first 2 weeks, this can carry on till up to 6 weeks.
Can I travel?
It is advised that you do not travel anywhere within 24 hrs of treatment. It is also vital to note that the abortion pill (up to 10 weeks) can cause some bleeding whilst travelling.
Why am I feeling more emotional than usual?
Due to the vast change in hormones feeling a range emotions that you would not usually feel is natural. Different women will feel very differently after an abortion, some experience tearfulness, anxiety, guilt, depression, sleeplessness, relief, sadness and anger.
What other activites should I know more information about?
It is advised that you only go to work when you feel fit to return. It’s best to avoid exercise for at least 1 week to insure recovery from any treatment. Avoid having sex for 1 week, women can become pregnant immediately following an abortion so contraception is key to avoid becoming pregnant.
A story from the brave
“I was 17 when I had the abortion” Why did you have an abortion? I had the abortion because I realised that I wouldn’t be able to look after another child on my own, and was worried I would not get support from my partner, and I didn’t want to be a single parent as I wasn’t sure if my parent would want to be involved.
Was it a joint decisions to have an abortion? From the start my partner wanted an abortion, but I took me a little while to get to that decision. At times I was sure about keeping the baby and nothing my partner said would have changed my mind. But eventually I changed my mind, due to my own thinking.
Please describe as best as you can remember, your thought process when you were trying to come up with a decision. “Now I think that if someone wanted an abortion, and they were sure that it was the right thing for them, then I believe it’s a perfectly fine thing to do”
Initially I was in two mind sets about what I wanted to do; when i first found out I was in shock and I wanted to have an abortion straight away, but after a while I started to get used to the idea of possibly having a child.
However, I was in the middle of my a-levels, but the change in my hormones, made me very stressed and emotional during an already stressful time at school and I realised that I couldn’t even look after myself, let alone a child.
How did you feel throughout the process of the abortion? When I found out that I was pregnant I was shocked, I didn’t know who to turn to or what to do next. At first my partner was the only one that knew to start with. Me and my mum were close, and she could tell something was up, so eventually I told her. (contin. on next page).
She was supportive and helped me come to my decision never forced me to do anything, it was all my decision. The abortion itself wasn’t as bad as I had anticipated it to be. However it was more that pain I went through after the abortion abortion that was the the harder for me.
It was like a period but heavier and much more painful. I was on pain killers constantly for about 2 or 3 days. After the abortion I started to doubt my decision, did I make the right choice? Should I have kept the baby? It was very difficult to cope with.
Has the abortion changed the way you think/ act about any life choices you make? I travel at every opportunity I can. I make the most of going out with friends and enjoying myself at work and uni. I know that if I did have a child, I would have a much more restricted lifestyle, so I make the most of the second chance I have been given. I think forwards to the future now with happy thoughts, rather than uncertainty.
I am much more careful with contraception now, I know that I could not cope with another abortion and I am not ready to have a child, I take it all a lot seriously than I did when I was 17. (contin. on next page).
My current partner is aware and supportive of my past; and we have a strong and honest relationship. I can trust him to help me through tough days when I think about the abortion. I do still have days where I think about the abortion and how different my life would be now, but that experience has made me who I am today and I am proud of who I am.
What advice would you give to an individual who is going through an abortion, without any support? I think it is important to try and talk you your partner if you can, and remember that it is something that both of you are going through together. I relied a lot on my mum during my abortion.
Although she was angry at first, she was very supportive of any decision I felt was right for me. She came with me to the clinic and supported me the whole time after. It would have been a much more difficult time if i didn’t have her.
“I think it has definitely made me appreciate being able to live my life in the here and now�
Good luck with the rest of your choices and don’t be afraid of asking for more support!