ARTWORK BY: Silverjow
NOT BEING READY FOR LIFE OR DEATH IS HAPPENING
This week, the world just got a little less perfect. One of the most talented, kindest, funniest and sweetest of GOD’s children was called home...and he was MORE than ready to go. Needless to say, I was prepared for the eventuality of his passing, as he had been living and suffering with Merkel Cell Cancer (very rare) for several years, but one is never TRULY ready when the time finally comes and you get the dreaded phone call letting your know a loved one has died. It’s like getting caught with your “pants down” (see pic to left).
Wayne Nilson and I met several years ago at a doll convention and immediately hit it off. We promised to stay in touch with each other and we did (for a while) but then it tapered off and I didn’t see him again until I was wandering the toy aisle of a local department store and bumped into him. At first, I did not recognize him. Mostly because he had on a mask on when in Florida most of the troglodytes had stopped wearing theirs. I heard his gentle voice say,”Frank...is that you?” I looked over into his amazingly, beautiful blue eyes and answered him with recognition immediately. There was no mistaking his voice or those peepers – that was my “Weenie”!
“Weenie” was a nickname of endearment I dubbed him with when I accidentally conflated “Wayne” with “Queen”. Needless to say it stuck and I think he secretly loved it. It definitely had NOTHING to do with his size or demeanor. The man was skyscraper tall, had a laugh as cheerful as the sun and heart the size of the whole damn moon! From that fateful day on, we were inseparable! Seeing each other at least once a week at our respective homes, going to lunch or just talking for hours on the phone.
I enjoyed soooo many wonderful afternoons with Wayne chatting about everything from fashion dolls (our shared hobby), classic movies, naughty things we did in our youth and our philosophies about life and death. We often said there was a reason GOD brought us together during this particular time in our lives. I had been suffering from a bit of agoraphobia (post pandemic) and Wayne had a compromised immune system due to his treatments. So, we were happier than “pigs in shit” just staying home working on projects together and gossiping about everything and everyone (we hated the same things/people for the SAME REASONS)
One lazy afternoon, he taught me a very valuable lesson. The ability to apologize. One would think that’s an easy one, but it’s not a quality most of us readily use gracefully. I explained to him, I had made a HUGE mistake by hurting someones feelings when being a bit “too honest” during a moment of frustration. He immediately answered back without even looking up from the fabric he was perusing,”Just call them or even better them a heartfelt letter explaining how wrong you were in that moment and you are sincerely sorry. If they don’t forgive you then, well, they are just assholes that want to hold a grudge unnecessarily.” You would of thought the Gay Dalai Lama himself uttered those words as they landed on me so profoundly. “Just apologize?” I thought. How elegant, honest and simple. I immediately did what he suggested and soon came a resolution to the issue.
We taught each other several things during our year of re-acquainting ourselves and fortifying our friendship. I, for example, taught him to be a bit more Cuban (aka: loudmouth) and speak his mind instead of keeping things inside. I was usually his “voice” when it came to things like that. He never wanted to upset or call any attention to his needs regardless of what they were. “I don’t want to make a fuss...”, he would say. So, I would end up being the “squeaky wheel” and was happy to do it. There was always a slight smile and glint in his eyes when I spoke up for him. I said the things he wouldn’t but wished he could.
In the end, I just never imagined a man with this much love and life left to give would be taken away so soon. I don’t know what a life without Wayne looks like yet. I do know it is going to be like when Dorothy went back to “sepia tones” after OZ was so wonderfully “Technicolor”. Wayne could not help but make things just, well, MORE BEAUTIFUL! It was his gift on Earth to all of us that knew and loved him. Especially his mom and husband Bennett
I won’t miss “Weenie”. Mostly because I’m going to keep him ALIVE in my thoughts and heart like I do ALL my other loved ones on the other side. I’m glad he is finally with his dad and meeting all the starlets that have passed before (he told me particularly he was going to hunt down Bette Davis, Tallulah Bankhead and Marilyn Monroe the first second he got through the Pearly Gates). I KNOW we will see each other again and positive he will have tons of great stories to tell me up once we are together again.
YOU were very much loved Wayne Nilson. I hope NOW you know that for certain. Rest In Peace and don’t worry, I will keep all my promises I made to you. You can count on me dear friend. Thank you for all the wonderful laughs, unconditional love and lessons you taught me. I’ll see you in every RAINBOW...always.
Light, Love and Peace, Francisco Garcia Publisher of HAPPENING DIGITAL MAGAZINE
ARE OUR “SMART” PHONES OUTSMARTING US?
Smart phone addiction is REAL and it’s potentially very dangerous. I think most of us can admit that we have become completely dependent on our phones. Literally everything we do from on-line banking to checking our emails, scrolling through social media, downloading applications and the list goes on, happens right in the palm of our hands. Of course, right up there on the list is — you guessed it — TEXTING! Isn’t it something that the preferred method of communication for many people these days is texting? When and how did this even happen? I understand that it’s easy and convenient to send a text; but in no way does texting resemble having a REAL CONVERSATION with someone on the phone. We are losing our ability to connect with each other with all these so called “smart” devices in our homes.
The Mayo Clinic conducted a study and published it’s findings in April 2022. Here is what too much time on our “smart” devices is linked to:
•Obesity
•Poor sleep
•Violence
•Less Play Time
•Eye strain
•Anxiety
•Neck & back Pain
•Loss of social skills
•Behavioral Problems
•Depression
•Difficulties with work or school
None of these findings should come as a surprise to us. Just look around and you see people in “social” settings not talking to each other. It’s far too common to see folks sitting in restaurants, scrolling through their phones and only when their food arrives do they put their devices down. I personally find this extremely problematic. Look at the list of findings above. I think we can all admit to having a few of those on the list. It’s time we really started to make this issue one that we take seriously.
Obviously, these devices are here to stay. We are living in a digital world. That’s just reality. But make no mistake about it — we CAN control how often we choose to be staring at our phones. Go for walks, read books or go to restaurants with friends/family and put our “smart” phones away for a while. I promise it won’t kill you. And, if we really want to reach out to a friend or loved one, we can pick up the phone, make that call and truly keep our connections alive - BY TALKING.
Celia Cruz first gained recognition in the 1950s, as a singer with the orchestra Sonora Matancera. Relocating to the United States after the ascent of Fidel Castro, Celia recorded 23 gold records with Tito Puente, the Fania AllStars and other collaborators.
Celia was born in Havana, Cuba on October 21, 1925. She grew up in the poor Havana neighborhood of Santos Suárez, where Cuba’s diverse musical climate became a growing influence. In the 1940s, Celia won a “La hora del té” (“Tea Time”) singing contest, propelling her into a music career. While Cruz’s mother encouraged her to enter other contests around Cuba, her more traditional father had other plans for her, encouraging her to become a teacher—a common occupation for Cuban women at that time.
Celia enrolled at the National Teachers’ College but dropped out soon after since her live and radio performances around were gaining acclaim. Tempering her own growing ambitions with her father’s wish for her to stay in school, she enrolled at Havana’s National Conservatory of Music. However, instead of finding reasons for continuing on the academic track, one of Cruz’s professors convinced her that she should pursue a full-time singing career.
Celia’s first recordings were made in 1948. In 1950, her singing career started its upward journey to stardom when she began singing with celebrated Cuban orchestra Sonora Matancera. Initially, there were doubts that Cruz could successfully replace the previous lead singer and that a woman could sell salsa records at all. However, Celia helped propel the group — and Latin music in general — to new heights, and the band toured widely through Central and North America throughout the 1950s
At the time of the 1959 Communist takeover of Cuba, Sonora Matancera was touring in Mexico, and members of the band decided to leave Cuba for good, crossing into the United States instead of returning to their homeland. Celia became a U.S. citizen in 1961, and Fidel Castro, enraged by Cruz’s defection, barred her from returning to Cuba. Celia never returned to her native island and lamented it all her life. Cruz remained relatively unknown in the United States beyond the Cuban exile community initially, but when she joined the Tito Puente Orchestra in the mid–1960s, she gained exposure to a wide audience. Puente had a large following across Latin America, and as the new face of the band, Cruz became a dynamic focus for the group, reaching a new fan base. On stage, Celia enthralled audiences with her flamboyant attire and crowd engagement—traits that bolstered her 40-year singing career. With her seemingly unfaltering vocals, Celia continued performing LIVE and recording albums throughout her entire life. In that time, she made more than 75 records, including 23 that went GOLD, and won several Grammys and Latin Grammys
She also appeared in several movies, earned a star on Hollywood’s Walk of Fame, and was awarded the American National Medal of the Arts by the National Endowment of the Arts. Soon she will be the first Cuban woman on the U.S. quarter in 2023 and was even made into a one of kind Barbie by Mattel. Celia died in 2003, at the age of 77.
Recently, while scrolling through my phone waiting for a friend that is perpetually late to EVERYTHING we do together (you know who you are), I came upon the work of a spectacular photographic artist. This is one of those wonderful moments where social media brings people together. I immediatly slid into his DMs and let him know how much I admired his beautiful work. I also informed him that I would love to feature it in my publication any time he would like. Well, we exchanged information and were soon chatting like old friends. I hope you enjoy this interview and photospread with my new friend ED GALLOWAY.
PHOTOS BY: ED GALLOWAY
HDM: Are you a formally trained photographer or naturally talented?
EG: I did study film in college but haven’t pursued that for many years. I like to think I have a “good eye” but I don’t consider myself a particularly technically proficient photographer.
HDM: How do you choose your models?
EG: I love to photograph people who are open and have a sense of confidence about them. Most of my models are members of the queer community in some way or another. I have reached out to people I want to shoot on various social media platforms or meeting apps. Sometimes a model will reach out to me which is always flattering because it means they have responded positively to something I’ve created. Primarily, I do nudes and very close bodyscapes so a model needs to be ok with nudity and a little bit of an exhibitionist streak doesn’t hurt!
HDM: Your pieces are so intimate. Describe your process of capturing that feeling with your subjects?
EG: I always start of with a frank conversation about comfort levels, boundaries, etc. I need the model to be a collaborator in the process; in other words, the end product is their creation as well as mine. I always reassure a model that if they’ve got certain restrictions such as wanting to remain anonymous or not shooting a tattoo for instance that would make them identifiable, I will honor that. Of course if someone has too many “don’ts” then they are probably not going to model for me.
Once a session begins, I like to talk and get to know who this person is who has been brave enough to enter my studio...it is a tremendous act of trust and faith to meet up with a stranger and take off one’s clothes! I’ve modeled nude myself and it is a very vulnerable position to put oneself into; but paradoxically, it is also liberating and very empowering. I tell them about me too so it’s definitely not a one way street. I’m from the South so I’m a talker. I want a session to be relaxed, fun, sexy and maybe a little boundary pushing in an adventurous sort of way.
HDM: HDM: There is so much amazing lighting and texture in you photography. How long does it take you to prepare for a session?
EG: Thank you very much for that compliment; that’s very nice! I can get into the right headspace by talking to a model and looking at pictures that they have shared by other photographers. My actual set up time is pretty quick.
HDM: Are there other photographers or artists that inspire your work?
EG: So many! Andrew Graham is a friend and brilliant. Florian Hetz for sure! There are people doing work that blows my mind who I would not have any idea where to start such as Justin Monroe, Richard Kranzin, Paul Freeman and many others.
HDM: Do you have a special “boy part” you enjoy shooting the most?
EG: (LOL) I’m pretty sure that almost every part can be beautiful or intriguing in some way. I confess, I am a big fan of a beautiful curvy glute! I usually ask a model to tell me what they think is their most beautiful or sexiest “part.” I will focus on that but also be on the lookout for other unexpected places, curves, textures, shadows and attractive creases.
HDM: I can see many couples enjoying a session with you. Do you take on commissioned projects?
EG: I would definitely be interested in shooting more couples if they like the kind of stuff I do. I don’t think I could legitimately promote myself as a boudoir photographer but there are people out there who do that beautifully. As far as commissions go, I’m very open to them and negotiable.
HDM: How do our readers find and follow your work?
EG: My Instagram is handle is @boy_parts_photography. I should build a website but I don’t know how! (LOL)
ALL IMAGES PROVIDED BY ED GALLOWAY
ARTWORK BY:
Alejandro Mogollo
Madonna responded to critics who mocked her appearance while she was presenting a performance at the 2023 Grammy Awards
The pop icon introduced Sam Smith and Kim Petras, who performed their hit “Unholy,” making Petras the first transgender woman to take the stage at the ceremony. But some fans honed in on Madonna’s face on social media, writing they were “so confused” by her appearance.
Madonna, 64, wrote in the caption of a lengthy Instagram post that the criticism of her appearance was rooted in “the ageism and misogyny that permeates the world we live in.”
She explained she initially wanted to present the album of the year award, but decided it was “more important” to introduce Petras’ performance, which she described as “a history making moment.” “And on top of that she won a Grammy!!” Madonna added.
“Instead of focusing on what I said in my speech which was about giving thanks for the fearlessness of artists like Sam and Kim- Many people chose to only talk about close-up photos of me taken with a long lens camera by a press photographer that would distort anyone’s face!!” she said.
“Once again I am caught in the glare of ageism and misogyny That permeates the world we live in,” she continued. “A world that refuses to celebrate women past the age of 45 And feels the need to punish her If she continues to be strong willed, hard-working and adventurous.” The singer went on to say she has “never apologized” for her creative choices, nor the way she looked or dressed throughout her career, and that she’s “not going to start” doing so now.
“I have been degraded by the media since the beginning of my career but I understand that this is all a test and I am happy to do the trailblazing so that all the women behind me can have an easier time in the years to come,” Madonna said.
She even referenced a Beyoncé lyric, who won three awards for her album “Renaissance” at the ceremony, writing, “You won’t break my soul.”
“I look forward to many more years of subversive behavior-pushing boundaries. Standing up to the patriarchy and MOST of all enjoying my life,” Madonna said, before quoting Beyoncé once again. “Bow down bitches!”
In Madonna’s introduction for Smith and Petras’ performance, she thanked the “rebels” and “troublemakers” for forging a new path, saying their “fearlessness does not go unnoticed.”
“Here’s what I’ve learned after four decades in music: If they call you shocking, scandalous, troublesome, problematic, provocative or dangerous, you are definitely onto something,” Madonna said.
Not to put OURSELVES on the same plane as a global music superstar, but Madonna, although she will never show it, HAS FEELINGS! Although an international living ICON - she is still HUMAN.
Plus, what business is it of OURS how the hell she chooses to look or spend her money on plastic surgery procedures.
Over the past few weeks Madonna has been targeted by trolls who—rather than focus on the groundbreaking moment when she introduced a performance by non-binary musician transgender singer at an award show, of which she’s won 7 over a 4-decade career—would rather point and laugh at her “unrecognizable” face and speculate about what plastic surgery she may have had. SO WHAT? To quote a Brittany fan (turned pornstar) Chris Croker,”LEAVE MADONNA ALONE ALREADY!”
When we say Trolls, by the way, this isn’t just keyboard warriors; we’re ALL sadly at it. I’ve personally noticed a number of prominent female-focused organizations posting on social media in defense of Madonna’s right to do what she wants with her body, only to face criticism from their followers, who have called the singer “hypocritical,” “a disgrace,” and someone who “needs help.”
What is going on? After all, we’re hardly strangers to needles. This is something that’s no longer spoken about in shameful hushed tones among friends, but out in the open and with recommendations for clinics shared via WhatsApp. Of course, there’s a generational divide: many women in their twenties favor a Bravo-inspired look that involves obvious dermal fillers—a pillowy aesthetic that has become a trend as much as a beauty standard made for social media. My peers, in our fifties, are cosmetic-curious, and there’s an expectation that you will have at least considered Botox, LED masks, or microneedling. And plenty of women and men in midlife and beyond are having tiny tweakments and top-ups. This is not news.
Come on everyone, let’s focus on the awe inspiring career. Let’s talk about the walls she has torn down. How about the enviable catalogue of music or countless awards? Perhaps when she stood up for the LGBTQA+ community WHEN NOBODY ELSE WOULD! She has been the MOTHER OF REINVENTION from the “get”. I mean Jesus - DID YOU JUST MEET HER?
To quote the Queen of Pop herself,”Bitch, I’m MADONNA.” And, at the very least that should garner her a little respect and privacy about her life choices and her body. I think she has given us enough. Give her a break.
Raquel Welch, a longtime actress, international sex symbol and Golden Globe winner, has died, publicists confirms on Wednesday, February 15th. The award winning actress, model and GAY Icon was 82 years old when she passed.
Raquel Welch “passed away peacefully early this morning after a brief illness,” her manager Steve Sauer. He continued,“Her career spanned over 50 years starring in over 30 films and 50 television series and appearances. The Golden Globe winner, in more recent years, was involved in a very successful line of wigs. Raquel leaves behind her two children, son Damon Welch and her daughter Tahnee Welch.” Raquel Welch made her film debut in the mid 1960s, with breakout roles in 1966’s Fantastic Voyage and One Million Years B.C. that same year. But, it was her role in cult classic Myra Breckenridge that is near and dear to the LGBTQA+ community as she played a gorgeous trans woman out for revenge on the men that mistreated her as a youth. She also played along side Mae West in the same film She would go on to star in dozens of films, including 1973’s The Three Musketeers, which earned her a Golden Globe for Best Actress in a motion picture comedy or musical. Other titles under her belt include 100 Rifles, The Prince and the Pauper, Chairman of the Board and more recently in Legally Blonde alongside Reese Witherspoon. Her final film role was in 2017’s How to Be a Latin Lover. She also memorably performed “I’m a Woman” with Cher back in 1975 on The Cher Show. This woman did it all!
Raquel Welch became a pin-up after flaunting her curves in 1966’s camp classic One Million Years B.C. But behind the glamour, the star (born Jo Raquel Tejada) was a hardworking single mom whose career as a sexbomb helped her raise 2 kids after splitting from her first husband in the early 60s.
The actress, whose book Beyond the Cleavage became a bestseller, previously told the media as she celebrated her 70th birthday in 2010,“I never thought life was going to give me something for nothing.”
Born in Chicago to a Bolivian-born engineer and his American wife,“By age 7 I knew I wanted to be an actress,” Raquel Welch said at the time.
She continued,“My parents enrolled me in a theater program. You could get away from some of the painfulness of real life. I always had flights of fancy.” Crediting her resilience to her mom, Josephine, she added at the time,“I’ve had a great life — and it’s not over yet!”
This amazing woman, so ahead of her time will be greatly missed.
