Conversations 1
Belonging
In my first assembly of the year, I spoke to the students about the importance of belonging and linked this to the very powerful story of Carlos Acosta. Acosta’s journey from the impoverished streets of Havana to becoming one of the most celebrated ballet dancers of modern times, is a powerful testament to belonging. He was one of eleven children, and his early life was marked by poverty, hardship, and a deep sense of not fitting in. Ballet was not his choice it was imposed by a father desperate to keep his son out of trouble and to find him a better life.
Acosta hated it at first, but things changed when he saw professional male dancers perform. In that moment, he saw possibility and he saw himself. He began to belong not just to ballet, but to a vision of what he could become.
Acosta’s story is not just about talent, but it is about transformation through connection. He found teachers who believed in him, communities that embraced him, and eventually, a stage where his identity was not just accepted but celebrated.
In high-achieving environments especially in girls’ schools where expectations are high and potential is vast the sense of being seen, valued, and connected is absolutely essential. Belonging is not merely about inclusion. It is about identity, passion, purpose, and resilience. It is what allows a girl to raise her hand in a room full of other gifted students, to take creative risks, to question, to argue her point.
Belonging and finding a passion are deeply connected in a school setting. When a student discovers something she truly loves, she begins to see herself as part of something bigger.
That passion gives her a place to thrive, a community to connect with, and a sense of purpose and, in turn, this fosters belonging. One Old Haberdasher captured this beautifully when she wrote to a member of staff after leaving Habs, expressing gratitude for discovering her love drama at school.
She shared, “I had no idea drama could be so vast and give me so many avenues to explore. It's shown me this thing that I love, that constantly makes me happy and creative, and for that I will always be grateful… It has been a space I have felt comfortable, where everyone can be their best selves.”
Her words remind us that when students find their passion, they often find themselves and with that, a true sense of belonging.
There’s much discussion about building confidence in girls, but confidence doesn’t grow in isolation it grows through connection.
Headmistress’ Conversations
When a girl feels she belongs, she’s more likely to take risks, explore new interests, and step into leadership. This kind of culture takes time and intention, shaped by the whole school community and carried forward by the students themselves.
One of our current Sixth Formers exemplifies this. In her Prefect interview, she spoke passionately about empowering younger students to build their confidence. Reflecting on her own journey, she shared how she initially struggled with confidence and to find her voice, but through the support of friends, staff, and the wider Habs community, she found both her place and her confidence. This sense of belonging and empowerment gave her the courage to step forward and put herself forward for a leadership role. She describes herself as having “found herself” here at Habs - a sentiment that resonates deeply and highlights the nurturing environment our school provides. Her kindness and genuine character continue to inspire others, and she is a wonderful example of how our community fosters confidence and leadership in our students.
When students feel a genuine sense of belonging, they are more likely to believe in themselves, set ambitious goals, and pursue them with confidence. At Habs, through strong pastoral care, inspirational teaching, and a vibrant co-curricular programme, we help students uncover what excites them and support them as they grow that excitement into confidence, resilience, and ambition. Beyond the classroom, student-led academic societies, visiting speakers, our partnerships programme and a wide range of clubs and activities offer further avenues for pushing themselves and developing ambition. The aim is to enable our students to see what they could become and give them the confidence and determination to succeed.
This spirit of ambition is often visible on the sports pitches. Two years ago, a Year 8 student who had never played lacrosse joined the team. Welcomed by her peers, she quickly found confidence, began playing in matches, and supported others in learning the game. Through her playing, she quickly demonstrated real ambition and determination. Today, she has been selected for the England Regional Team and coaches our younger students Her journey shows how discovering a passion can spark ambition and belonging and how belonging can unlock potential.
Whilst finding your passion is key to belonging, for our students to thrive both at school and beyond, they must first understand who they are, be respected and know how to feel confident in being themselves. Whilst initially, Acosta had a deep sense of not fitting in, he did very quickly see himself through the community who embraced him – and this is very much the environment we replicate at Habs Girls.
We are proud of the rich diversity within our community. We celebrate the uniqueness of every student and foster an environment where differences are deeply valued and championed. Girls are encouraged to bring their whole selves to school this enables them to take risks, try new things and speak with authenticity. Faith assemblies led by students, cultural celebrations, and societies such as the African and Caribbean Society, Christian Union, Muslim Society, JSoc, South Asian Society, and LGBT Society all contribute to a culture of inclusion and respect. All cultures are celebrated (just like Acosta).
A girl who belongs in school becomes a woman who belongs in the world. She’ll walk into universities, boardrooms, studios, and labs, with the quiet confidence that her voice matters. She’ll create community wherever she goes because she knows what it feels like to be lifted, and she’ll want to do the same for others.
