else. A female version of the mid-life crisis? Or, in my cousin’s case, quarter-life crisis? Maybe, maybe not. So, what gives? Personally, I think women fail to see the bigger picture and really think things through before walking down that aisle dressed all in white. Whether they say “I do” to the first guy who asks them fearing no one else ever will, or the blaring tick-tock of the biological clock, or cultural/societal pressure to couple-up and procreate, the woes of weary wives is everincreasing. Or, could it simply be being a princess for a day is worth all the pain and regret down the road? That seems like a lot of unnecessary misery for a mere 24 hours of non-stop adulation from friends and family. What seems to be even worse is that the men are left holding the bag. On average, it takes women a few solid years to successfully convince their guys to pop the question with the little blue box and white bow in hand. When the guy finally acquiesces to the ultimatums and nagging for nuptials, plus building the “Barbie” dream house filled to the brim with mini-me’s, the woman suddenly wants out. I find this on-going trend increasingly common amongst married women in their 30s and older. And, equally concerning. Whether it was for financial security, cultural pressure, or posterity, these women really haven’t thought the entire process through. The institution of marriage isn’t one to be taken so cavalierly. Wedding vows don’t come with an expiration date, whether the honeymoon phase
ends in two months or 20 years. You really need to do some soul-searching and know what you’re getting yourself into – long-term. Figure out what you want and how you and your potential s.o. can build a lifetime partnership that's both fulfilling and rewarding. It won’t always be easy, but I’m sure it will be worth it if you dive in for all the right reasons. Because, there will inevitably come a time when the embers of romantic love cool and companion love begins to bud. Are you ready for that? It’s not exactly heart-stopping in an unceremonious “sex-on-the-staircase” sort of way. Maybe, sometimes it will be, but not most of the time. Someone else’s grass isn’t always greener. There isn’t something better around the next corner, just something different. Don’t jump from the frying pan into the fryer because you may get burned. Decidedly, not all marriages are made in Heaven, but I’d be willing to go through Hell just to get there – if that’s what I truly wanted. I could’ve stayed back in Jersey, settled for a “secure” job working for the phone company, and enthusiastically said “yes” to the first guy who asked me. But, in my heart of hearts, I knew there was so much more out there and I was determined to get it. Honestly, if I could extract each excellent quality from all my past beaus and guys I dated and put them in a Boyfriend Bullet blender, I’d have the perfect man! But, would I have the perfect marriage? I’m not taking my chances.