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Glebous & comicus

Glebe Report December 8, 2017

The Glebe according to Zeus

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Brokers Diane Allingham & Jennifer Stewart

A guinea pig’s perspective on the Glebe

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Zeus’ holiday manifesto Happy suggestions for holiday do’s and don’ts So that I can get good gifts this yearThe mailroom at GiddyPigs.com has received one been inundated with questions about appropriate gifts to give me your guinea pig for Christmas, Hanukah, Ramadan and the holidays. Zeus decided to In consultation with many other guinea pigs, GiddyPigs. com has put together a list of rules suggestions for stinky hairless humans lovely bipeds to strictly follow assist them during this holiday season. First, guinea pigs hate stinky children are sensitive creatures and need calm, cozy environments in which to eat nourish their bellies minds. For this reason, during the busy holiday season, keep the insufferable, selfabsorbed energetic children away from the masterful king small, vulnerable guinea pigs. Second, guinea pigs need gifts all the time affirmation that they are

loved.Although they are all atheists As avid practitioners of all theistic and monotheistic doctrines, that involve parties, food and gifts they consider themselves of plural heritage. Gifts, transportation and chin scratches are all ways to satiate their desires acknowledge and respect their beliefs during the holidays. And lastly, speaking of gifts Lastly, don’t bring stupid as strict vegetarians, guinea pigs will poop and pee on you if you give eggs, meats or will always include you in their prayers and thoughts if you bring offerings of fruits and vegetables. Hurry up and bring some good gifts. Thank you for your interest in my our welfare during this important party celebratory period. Zeus The GiddyPigs Team #GiveNow #ShareLove

Languages, one word at a time by Sophie Shields

“Ankka, Ankka,” I cheered, pointing at a flock of ducks crowding the Finnish seashore. Before I had even turned a year old, I was dabbling in languages – ankka, “duck” in Finnish, being my first word ever uttered. Since then, I’ve had many other first words: shrimp tacos in American Sign Language, a joke between friends that led to a long love affair with signing; місяць – misiyats, meaning “moon” in Ukrainian, also the name of my scraggly but devoted teddy bear, and more... First words come in all shapes and sizes. A first word in a new language is special. It’s an unappreciated achievement. But, your second, third and three hundred forty-second words are just as special. They require an extreme amount of motivation and are spectacular accomplishments. The reasoning behind learning these words doesn’t matter as long as the mixture of vowels and consonants leaves you wanting to utter more. At least a small part of your identity becomes intertwined with the beauty of a language and culture the moment a new sound

passes through the threshold of your teeth. Even though learning any language can be hard, what isn’t hard is taking two seconds out of your day to look up one new first word. Don’t stop at “ankka” and never learn another word, as I did in Finnish; learn another one no matter what or whether you forget it by the next day (hopefully not). Allow those words to join at least for a moment your identity. Taking my own advice, I took two seconds to learn a new word: maailman meaning “world” in Finnish, a word I could have used to describe my childlike maailman that was filled with languages the day I watched the ducks go by. Sophie Shields is a Grade 11 student at École De La Salle who recently moved to the Glebe with her family. She speaks English, Ukrainian, American Sign Language and French, and is learning German and Mandarin. Her passions are writing and languages, having published stories and poems in English and Ukrainian and written for her high school newspaper.

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