very sick, but I will survive question for a woman: “Will I lose my hair?” “Yes,” she says softly. “Within three weeks, but it will grow back. Now, before I examine you, let me introduce you to Jean, she is a nurse manager and will be with you for the next few years.” I cannot explain why, but I felt so safe that the woman with the aura would be my angel. “Hello Lesley,” she says. “Hello Jean,” I reply. After the examination, I dress as the surgeon confers with Dr Gillian. As both doctors leave the room, Dr Gillian glances back and says: Try not to worry, Lesley. You are in good hands.” “Thank you” I say as the door closes quietly behind them. I turn to Jean and my eyes fill. I was trying to be so brave. She puts her arms around me and promises: “I will never leave you, Lesley, you will never be alone.” I feel empowered, not scared or sad, as
though what has just happened had been wonderfully orchestrated and timed. These three strangers were now gong to play a vital role in my survival. Jean and I chat for a while and she gives me a copy of my treatment plan. I feel so comfortable with her, this stranger who was about to become one of my best friends. On leaving the hospital, I hail a taxi and
A choir is singing carols and I am heading towards my favourite bistro... I am going to have a lovely afternoon ask him to take me to Princes Square in Buchanan Street. I sit back in the taxi, my head a whirlwind of emotions at the prospect of what lies in front of me. So many wild thoughts are running through me, each clamouring to be heard. All of
this is ahead of me and suddenly I think: To hell with it. It is the Christmas season, made magical with all the beautiful, twinkling lights, sparkling trees covered in tinsel and baubles. There is a choir singing winter carols in the square and I am heading towards my favourite bistro where I will order a cheese board and a welcome glass of Pinot Grigio. I am going to enjoy the day, put everything on the back burner for the moment. I am going to have a lovely afternoon. I’m calm. I will tell my husband tonight. As Winston Churchill once said: “If you’re going through hell, keep going!” Three days later my letter arrives. I am very sick, but I will survive. My spirit is stronger than the black shadow. l Join Lesley at a Macmillan Tea and Coffee day in Yummy Things, Troon, on Seotember 22, 11am - 3pm. Tea, coffee, delicious cakes, guitar music and two readings from Lesley.
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