CumSkull

A TERRIBLE TWITTER FANFIC BY @IAREDOMINATE CHAPTER 1 It was a cold, damp morning. The rain had fallen heavily during the night. The air was heavy with humidity and the smells of a city. @hairyskeletor was the bus, on his way to meet fellow bounty hunters. Their target? @crime _man _, the notorious criminal. @crime _man _ had a criminal record that went on for thousands of tweets. Day in and day out, @crime _man _ was doing a crime.

Many attempts proceeded @hairyskeletor 's. He knew he would need help. To this end, @hairyskeletor had employed the help of @weedcoffin and @sickcoffin. Together they had come up with a plan to end @crime _man _ 's reign of terror over the city. It was a dangerous plan, filled with risk, but the bitcoins being offered for @crime _man _ 's bounty was too high to resist. The bus stopped moving. @hairyskeletor got out of his seat, he had reached his destination. @hairskeletor was no longer the bus. Waiting for him was @weedcoffin and @sickcoffin. @sickcoffin was a tall, serious man. Standing just over 6 feet tall with a slender frame, @sickcoffin was an imposing figure. @weedcoffin looked just like princess bubblegum from adventure time. So much so that it was disturbing, because that is a cartoon and this is reality. They began walking towards @crime _man _ 's hideout, discussing the plan as they went. Suddenly, @weedcoffin saw a cute dogge. Her razor sharp instincts took over. @weedcoffin ran into the street to give the dogge a hug. Unfortunately, when @weedcoffin ran into the street she was hit by a bus. As the bus sped by @hairyskeletor caught a glimpse of @crime _man_ behind the steering wheel. @weedcoffin 's final cry of 'FRICK' rang out in the damp evening. @sickcoffin declared 'wow fuck this' and he and @hairyskeletor decided to postpone their capture of @crime _man _ . @hairyskeletor went to an outdoor cafe to gather his thoughts. His head was spinning with the events of the evening. He sat down and ordered a coffee. He buried his head in his hands, trying to figure out what his next move should be. Through his foggy mind he heard someone sit down across from him. @hairyskeletor looked up to see Amanda Bynes sitting in front of him. @hairyskeletor was ferociously in love with Amanda Bynes, a fact well documented with his blog on twitter dot com. But something was amiss. The white facepaint. The white gloves. The shirt with black and white horizontal stripes. The black beret. Amanda Bynes was a mime. @hairyskeletor was torn between his love for Amanda Bynes and his disdain for mimes. THeir eyes met, Amanda's eyes pleading for acceptance and @hairskeletor 's eyes exposing his internal torment. Amanda stood up, and began pulling herself away using a rope which did not exist. As she was pulling herself the road a bus drove by, again piloted by @crime _man _ , and hit her. @hairyskeletor reached out, tears welling in his eyes, but he could do nothing. He vowed to catch @crime _man _ and make him pay for his consistently committed crimes.

END CHAPTER 1