Classifying Your Kids’ Friends

BY MICHAEL JOHNSON

We parents are always on the heightened prowl to keep our kids engaged and running in supportive and worthwhile social circles. Part of our job as good parents is to keep our kids crashing around with the right crowd. Every day with our offspring, we scan the horizon endlessly for positive influences when approving or disapproving our children’s choices for friends.

Consequently, our kids meet a wide array of fellow youngsters who either become fast friends, convenient alibis, partners-in-crime, or parental favorites. It takes a village to form the pack that crosses paths with our kids daily. I am here today to over-generalize potentially in a controversial way and categorize some archetypes of our children’s friends. Here are some notable categories:

The Gladiator

This youngster is always up for a contest. The competitive spirit is strong in this one. They are always looking for the victory and hate losing. They can turn a simple game of basketball or bottle flipping into something in which there is a clear delineation between the loser and the winner. There is no in-between. They tend to inspire your child to raise their “game,” but can also be none-too-modest when they are victorious and therefore leave your own offspring pouting on occasion.

The Polite One

This kid is a parent’s dream. He always has a “Thank you” or “Yes, sir” chambered and ready to aim at you at a moment’s notice. Granted, he doesn’t offer the same thrills typically of the more edgy or boisterous friend, but frankly, that is okay. You hope that this demure and polite child rubs off on your own child in terms of being grateful for everything and a delight in the presence of other people. This childhood friend is a dream to have over for sleepovers or on a day trip, where all you want is gratitude and pleasant discourse in return for the money expended on gas and food or admission price to this or that.

The Pleasantly Privileged

This friend is the kid living in the high-end neighborhood with three more bedrooms and three more bathrooms at his house than at yours. He knows what it is like to have a PlayStation and Xbox running simultaneously in his bedroom that is bigger than your first apartment. He invites your child to the coolest destinations and has the most elaborate birthday parties with virtual reality trailers parked out front of the house. Refreshingly, this friend, in fact, has parents who are always very cognizant that he leads a privileged life and wants to make sure he is grateful in your presence when he is away from home.

The Eddie Haskell

If you are an old man like me and happen to remember the TV show “Leave it to Beaver,” you know the character Eddie Haskell. Eddie Haskell was a wiseguy and mischievous young man who would always turn on the charm when elders were present. When addressing Beaver Cleaver’s mother, Eddie would say things like, “Good afternoon, Mrs. Cleaver, that is a lovely dress you are wearing today.” He was a bit of a sneaky sycophant, and out of earshot of the parents, he was up to mischief. I have not always seen through this type of friend, but my son is sometimes quick to fill me in on how I have been duped unsuspectingly.

The Lover of the Great Indoors

Here we have the child who, if presented with a recreational opportunity outside, will inevitably balk. He seems keener on video games than frolicking outside in the elements. He is just as happy at home perched on a cozy gaming chair than in an environment where there might be excessive heat or viruses or bugs or exertion of any sort. Some may classify him as the ultimate “homebody,” who never wants to stray too far from his mom’s fried mozzarella sticks. He is unassuming and just a little shy, but once the fun gets underway and against his better judgment, he raises his “game” and suddenly finds himself having a good time, even if it is outside.

The Search Engine

I have always been enamored of my son’s friends who are walking “Google search” engines. These are the kids whom you can ask, “Who had the highest batting average in the National League in Major League Baseball last season?” or who can tell you if salamanders are reptiles or amphibians. They are whiz-kids with technology and while you try to figure out how simply to scan a QR code instead of your own retina, they can probably tell you how computer programmers wrote the algorithms for reading QR codes. These friends will sometimes get an eyeroll from your own child when you have asked this little Einstein friend if he has any idea how to make the font on your phone bigger so you can read it.

Maybe you, too, have a horribly generalized set of categories for your children’s friends. Perhaps you have your favorites and those you want to steer clear of. Either way, our kids manage to collect a vast basketful of compadres who fit themselves comfortably into stereotypes that are entertaining, enduring, and memorable. Here’s to celebrating the mixture of personalities who travel into and out of our kids’ adventurous lives!

Creating Social Media Boundaries with Family Members for the Safety of Your Children

BY TARYN JEREZ

Raising children in a digital age where social media plays such a large role in our daily lives creates new layers of safety and social concerns for parents. Thankfully, more recently parents are having discussions about what the role of social media will look like in their own children’s lives, including when they will have access to these media and under what level of supervision. It’s just as important, however, to decide what boundaries you want other family members and caregivers to acknowledge when it comes to involving your children

Understanding the Importance of Setting Social Media Boundaries

Social media can keep us in touch with old friends and far-away family members, or inspire and teach us; it can also be a breeding ground for toxic thoughts, unhealthy comparisons, and mentally damaging images. Where children are involved, the negative aspects tend to stack up. There are safety concerns, such as private information being shared publicly or a permanent virtual footprint being established before they even have a say. Seek awareness over these issues and have conversations with your parenting partner about what you are and are not comfortable with, when it comes to what is shared on social media.

Prioritizing Your Family’s Safety and Comfort First and Foremost

Understand that even when you put a lot of consideration into setting boundaries to benefit your children, not every person in your life will share how you feel. Whether it’s social media use, how you discipline or when bedtime is to be—everyone will have an opinion! Even when it’s difficult, prioritize what makes you feel comfortable when it comes to your children’s safety, mental health, and future.

Questions to consider when creating social media boundaries:

• Am I comfortable with photos/ videos of my child on social media?

• Are there specific boundaries around what kind of photos/videos can be shared?

• Do I want to approve content that pertains to my child before it’s posted? • Is there any information about my child/family that is off limits to share?

• Are there any social media platforms that I don’t want my child shared on?

• Do you refrain from “real time” images being shared when my child is somewhere else besides at home?

• What will or won’t my child be happy about that I shared online when they are older? • Are there privacy settings

I want enforced if content is being shared?

Communicate Clearly and Set Firm, Equal Boundaries

Conversations around boundaries aren’t exactly ‘“fun” to have or to hear. To keep things as neutral as possible when sharing with your friends and family; try to be as clear as possible about what you are asking. This includes any absolutes you decide on—the things that you really need them to agree on and understand fully. It may be helpful to provide a simple statement as to why these boundaries are important. This isn’t because you have to justify your parenting, but to help drill in the importance of what you’re doing, so they absorb it fully. Equal boundaries can help prevent different people from following different rules, or ill feelings coming out later. For example, whatever boundaries you express to your motherin-law, be sure to share the same ones with your own mother! (That’s just an argument waiting to happen!)

Have a Plan for When Someone Inevitably Messes Up

Remember, there will be slip ups! Perhaps grandma saw no harm in sharing photos from the family pool day on her Facebook—she wasn’t thinking about the request you made to not share photos of your kids in bathing suits or not fully clothed. Instead of calling to tell poor grandma off, think about kindly reminding her about the boundaries you’ve set and why these are important to your family. More than likely, it will be a good reminder and hopefully result in her removing the photo. These reminders aren’t meant to make anyone feel bad, but to advocate for your children and their safety.

Allow Space for Change and Boundaries to Evolve with Time

Just because you did or didn’t have a certain boundary set previously doesn’t mean you can’t change that now. Remember that’s your prerogative as a parent. You, more than anyone, know your child and their emotional and mental maturity, allowing you to be most informed and make decisions at different stages for which boundaries may be appropriate. There is nothing wrong with evolving your boundaries and sharing those updates with family members if it helps them to keep enforcing what you’re working on at home, or the safety of your child a priority.

Weeks Flooring

All About All About

BY ANGELIA CORNATZER BY ANGELIA CORNATZER

WHAT IS EDUCATOR WAREHOUSE? WHAT IS EDUCATOR WAREHOUSE?

Educator Warehouse is a project of Forsyth Educator Educator Warehouse is a project of Forsyth Educator Partnership and Winston-Salem Forsyth County Council of Partnership and Winston-Salem Forsyth County Council of PTAs that is located right behind Diggs-Latham Elementary PTAs that is located right behind Diggs-Latham Elementary School. They have a huge selection of new and gently-used School. They have a huge selection of new and gently-used items to be used by classrooms and teachers! Everything has items to be used by classrooms and teachers! Everything has been donated by individuals, organizations, and businesses been donated by individuals, organizations, and businesses from the community for teachers to have what they need in from the community for teachers to have what they need in the classroom. the classroom. Educator Warehouse is able to offer online shopping for Educator Warehouse is able to offer online shopping for teachers as well as in person shopping. To shop in person, teachers as well as in person shopping. To shop in person, teachers need to sign up online to secure their spot for a teachers need to sign up online to secure their spot for a specific day. If a teacher is shopping online, they will be able specific day. If a teacher is shopping online, they will be able to pick up their items in person at Educator Warehouse. to pick up their items in person at Educator Warehouse. Teachers are able to visit this incredible resource once each Teachers are able to visit this incredible resource once each quarter on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 3:30-5:30 as well quarter on Tuesdays and Thursdays from 3:30-5:30 as well as the first and third Saturdays of each month from 9:00as the first and third Saturdays of each month from 9:0011:00am (late August through the first of June). 11:00am (late August through the first of June).

HOW CAN I GET INVOLVED HOW CAN I GET INVOLVED WITH EDUCATOR WAREHOUSE? WITH EDUCATOR WAREHOUSE?

Donate! Donate! There are so many ways that you and everyone you know There are so many ways that you and everyone you know can support our teachers in Winston-Salem Forsyth County can support our teachers in Winston-Salem Forsyth County Schools by getting involved with Educator Warehouse. Schools by getting involved with Educator Warehouse. Donating new and gently-used school supplies is a huge need Donating new and gently-used school supplies is a huge need at Educator Warehouse. If you don’t have time to pick things at Educator Warehouse. If you don’t have time to pick things up and drop them off, feel free to shop on Amazon and select up and drop them off, feel free to shop on Amazon and select the shipment to be delivered to: Diggs Latham Elementary, the shipment to be delivered to: Diggs Latham Elementary, located at 396 Hutton Street, Winston-Salem, NC 27101. located at 396 Hutton Street, Winston-Salem, NC 27101. Check out their donation wish list below! Check out their donation wish list below!

CLASSROOM AND OFFICE SUPPLIES CLASSROOM AND OFFICE SUPPLIES • Paper—all colors, sizes, and types,• Paper—all colors, sizes, and types, copy paper 8 1/2 x 11 copy paper 8 1/2 x 11 • Pens, pencils, crayons, markers, highlighters, • Pens, pencils, crayons, markers, highlighters, dry erase markers dry erase markers • Scissors, glue, pencil sharpeners and erasers, • Scissors, glue, pencil sharpeners and erasers, pencil boxes & pouches pencil boxes & pouches • Kleenex, wet wipes, disposable gloves, • Kleenex, wet wipes, disposable gloves, and hand sanitizer and hand sanitizer • Post-it/sticky notes, composition notebooks, • Post-it/sticky notes, composition notebooks, sheet protectors, & pocket folders sheet protectors, & pocket folders • Staplers, tape dispensers, binder clips, tape, • Staplers, tape dispensers, binder clips, tape, glue sticks, rubber bands, organizers, and more! glue sticks, rubber bands, organizers, and more!

INSTRUCTIONAL MATERIALS INSTRUCTIONAL MATERIALS • Teacher resource books (Copyright after 2010), • Teacher resource books (Copyright after 2010), children’s books and novels children’s books and novels • Bulletin board materials, posters,• Bulletin board materials, posters, arts/crafts & room decor arts/crafts & room decor • Math, Science, Social Studies • Math, Science, Social Studies and Language Arts manipulatives and Language Arts manipulatives • Games, puzzles, flash cards and more• Games, puzzles, flash cards and more MOST NEEDED CORE ITEMS FOR CLASSROOMS: MOST NEEDED CORE ITEMS FOR CLASSROOMS:

• Pencils • Pens • Colored Pencils • Mechanical Pencils • Crayons • Notebook Paper

• Pencils • Scissors (large and small) • Pens • Rulers • Colored Pencils • Sharpies, Highlighters, Markers • Mechanical Pencils • Glue Sticks, Glue Bottles • Crayons • Kleenex • Notebook Paper • Hand Sanitizer

• Scissors (large and small) • Rulers • Sharpies, Highlighters, Markers • Glue Sticks, Glue Bottles • Kleenex • Hand Sanitizer

TOP 12 OFFICE ESSENTIALS: TOP 12 OFFICE ESSENTIALS:

• Binder Clips • Paper Clips • Rubber Bands • Staplers, Staples, Staple Removers • Scotch Tape Dispensers,

Scotch Tape • 1, 2 and 3-Hole Punch

• Binder Clips • Post-It Notes • Paper Clips • Desk Organizers • Rubber Bands • Handheld Calculators • Staplers, Staples, Staple Removers • Jump Drives, CD Disks • Scotch Tape Dispensers, • Sheet Protectors

Scotch Tape • Bookends • 1, 2 and 3-Hole Punch • Pencil Sharpeners

• Post-It Notes • Desk Organizers • Handheld Calculators • Jump Drives, CD Disks • Sheet Protectors • Bookends • Pencil Sharpeners

VOLUNTEER! VOLUNTEER!

Educator Warehouse is thankful to have their warehouse manager, Kendra. Educator Warehouse is thankful to have their warehouse manager, Kendra. Kendra always needs a team of committed volunteers to keep the impact of Kendra always needs a team of committed volunteers to keep the impact of Educator Warehouse going strong. Whether you can commit to volunteering Educator Warehouse going strong. Whether you can commit to volunteering once a month or once a week, Educator Warehouse needs you! This is a once a month or once a week, Educator Warehouse needs you! This is a great opportunity to serve those who serve our community so much. The great opportunity to serve those who serve our community so much. The teachers you will get to meet and help as you volunteer will make you want teachers you will get to meet and help as you volunteer will make you want to come back for more. to come back for more.

GIVE! GIVE!

Monetary donations are welcomed at Educator Warehouse to further Monetary donations are welcomed at Educator Warehouse to further the impact on classrooms in the community. All donations are 100% taxthe impact on classrooms in the community. All donations are 100% taxdeductible. You can make an online donation or mail checks payable deductible. You can make an online donation or mail checks payable to Educator Warehouse to: Forsyth Educator Partnership, PO Box 141 - to Educator Warehouse to: Forsyth Educator Partnership, PO Box 141 - Winston-Salem, NC 27102. Winston-Salem, NC 27102.