The Quest for Self-Discovery During COVID

WRITTEN by Anna Williams DESIGNED by Jordan Mays

College is meant to be a period of liberation, independence, personal growth, and the exploration of one’s individuality. For many, it’s the first time experiencing the freedom of living away from home, which allows space for the journey of self-discovery and finding one’s purpose. However, the pandemic has halted this imperative period of development for many college students.

Not only has COVID prevented students from learning in person, but it has also hindered our ability to socialize, discover our passions, and expand our comfort zones. Instead of being socially distant, we have begun to feel socially isolated. This feeling of isolation has consequently resulted in rising depression rates around the world, particularly for people in their 20’s.

In a research survey conducted by the CDC, people ages 18-24 felt the effects of COVID most intensely (Czeisler). There is a widespread mindset that the pandemic has kept us from enjoying our twenties: a time when we’re traditionally thought of to be our most liberated selves. Instead, we are left struggling to imagine a successful future without COVID.

According to a psychological researcher on the project, nearly 63% of participants showed an increase in depression, anxiety, or substance abuse to cope with their emotions (Czeisler).

Looking at these numbers, it’s no wonder why college students feel a lack of motivation, purpose, and sense of self. These emotions are all too familiar for our generation right now, so it’s important to know that you aren’t alone in your isolation.

To better understand this issue amongst college students, I spoke with UNCW sophomore Molly Kennelly on how she feels the pandemic has impacted different areas of her life. What is your major? Studio art

How do you feel your motivation towards school has shifted since the start of the pandemic? At the beginning, I didn’t realize how much the online classes would affect my productivity, but I’ve found that not having a set schedule makes it harder to make myself do work. I do know some students though that enjoy online classes because it allows flexibility to do other things like having a job. I also have less motivation to get involved with the school doing extracurriculars and joining clubs because most of them are on zoom which makes it harder to get involved and meet people. I feel like I never got the opportunity to get involved with the school and that I’m missing out on a lot. I think a lot of students feel like it’s harder to visualize the career that you want and your life in the future because of how our generation has experienced such a big and unexpected loss.

Do you feel that the pandemic has affected your personal growth in any way? Majorly. I have an art business that hasn’t been able to grow because of the pandemic. I haven’t been able to improve my art skills which have halted my commissions and caused me to doubt my abilities. Struggling with self-doubt and trying to find self-discipline has been a big factor in my decline in motivation and making me feel like I’m not where I’m supposed to be in life.

How have you been able to combat feelings of stunted growth throughout the pandemic? I feel like the pandemic has forced a lot of people to focus on their inner emotional issues in a way they never have before. Having so much time with myself has definitely made me focus more on my physical and mental well-being. I’ve been able to find ways to care for myself, and I probably wouldn’t have been able to know myself like that if it wasn’t for the pandemic. Finding new hobbies and places in Wilmington has also been a great way to find adventure during COVID. I actually learned to knit so that’s been really fun! 2020 was a tough year, to say the least. We deserve to show ourselves love and patience as we adjust to living with all of the problems that plague our world today. It may feel like our situation is hindering us from becoming our best selves, but perhaps we are getting the opportunity to evolve in a way that no other generation before us has been able to.

Czeisler MÉ , Lane RI, Petrosky E, et al. Mental Health, Substance Use, and Suicidal Ideation During the COVID-19 Pandemic — United States, June 24–30, 2020. MMWR Morb Mortal Wkly Rep 2020;69:1049–1057. http://dx.doi.org/10.15585/mmwr. mm6932a1external icon.