Abused
(This is a model, not the actual person)
M
om and I were having a “heart to heart” talk at my apartment when the phone rang. Picking it up, I heard a woman’s voice on the other end say, “Hello, this is ‘Susan Howard.’” I hadn’t talked to “Sue” in at least fifteen years, and her voice shook me to my core! She said if I was willing, she’d like to meet with me to discuss some issues from her past. I agreed, but was dreading what she might want to talk about. A memory was being opened up that unfolded a nightmare I’d suppressed since I was a little girl. What followed jolted both Mom and me! “Mother, do you remember the Day Care where ‘David’ and I stayed when you and Dad were working?” “Why, yes, ‘Josey,’ that was ‘Jim and Martha Howard’s’ facility we used for several years. “You never liked that place, did you, dear?” Almost breathlessly, I went on, “You’re right, I hated that place! “Well, their daughter, ‘Sue’ wants to get together with me. “Oh, no! It’s all coming back!” As I sat there stunned by what was flooding my mind, I begged the Lord to make it stop! I didn’t want to see all that ugliness and was sickened by what I was remembering! I tried the best I could to communicate it to my mom, and she was totally appalled at what I was sharing with her.
“Sue’s” dad and mom had sexually abused me when I was a child. I’d managed to bury it so deep, it wasn’t until that hot July day when the phone rang, that it all came bubbling up! The whole ugly picture was now coming into clear view. “Sue’s” parents also abused her and her two sisters — those girls lived a horrible existence! The “Howard’s” would look for any wrong behavior from their daughters and abuse them as punishment. The girls were terrorized and hurt in unspeakable ways! The screams that came from the bathroom were deafening, and I’d tremble with fear that it would be happening to me again if I wasn’t perfect in their sight. I can still see “Mr. & Mrs. Howard” taking me in the supply room and forcing me to take off my clothes. I was threatened that if I ever told, they’d hurt “David” the same way they did their girls and me. So, of course, I kept quiet! As I remembered those events, I realized my whole life had been traumatic! I didn’t just suffer at the hands of the “Howards.” Summers were often spent at my grandparents. “David” and I begged our parents to let us stay home, but both my folks had to work, and our grandparents were willing to keep us for free. We were both petrified when they dropped us off, but Dad threatened if we didn’t shut
up, he’d take off his belt and give us something to cry about! We didn’t know why our grandmother was so mean to us, but later we found out she’d been diagnosed with a mental disease. All we knew was that her behavior was frequently bizarre! Once I overheard her telling a neighbor she couldn’t stand my brother and me. I also learned that on two occasions, she tried to kill my dad when he was a little boy. My own home was full of drama as well! Dad was a mean drunk and often terrified our family with his anger and fits of rage. Almost anything would set him off! One morning he came in from an overnight bender and decided that since I wasn’t up yet, he’d teach me a lesson. He beat me so badly that my mom had to use her makeup to cover the marks on my body before I went to school that morning. I was fearful of him, but I was also growing intensely angry! It was hard, too, to understand why my mother did nothing to protect me. When I was fourteen, my father came home one day in a drunken stupor, and loudly threatened to kill all of us. Again, my mom did nothing — she was just too afraid of him! Years later, Mother and I were able to work through all this. But back then when it was going on, without letting her know, I got up enough nerve to talk to the school counselor about it. She was very understanding and I felt better just getting it off my chest. I promised to let her know if it ever happened again. There were so many instances that she finally called the authorities and my dad was arrested. I knew I shouldn’t feel the way I did, but I was actually glad they locked him up!
A year later, I went with some friends to a youth rally and heard the gospel for the very first time. On my way home, I looked up to heaven and cried out to God, “Lord, if you’re real, please save me!” I was miraculously changed in that instant! I no longer wanted to do the things I’d done before, and I was just so hungry to know this wonderful God who had transformed my heart! I knew then I was loved beyond what I’d ever experienced, but all those painful events still hurt every time they were triggered. I prayed many times through the years for God to heal my emotions, and held onto the hope that some day He would! I was plagued with fear and anger, which kept me isolated. My heart was so guarded that very few people could get inside, and I kept most at arms length. I wanted freedom, but couldn’t seem to find it! When my pastor realized I needed more help than he could provide, he recommended I check out Faith Family. I went there depressed and feeling hopeless, but in my first session, God started healing my soul and comforting me with His love and kindness! It’s difficult to describe, but just like the miracle of my salvation experience, God miraculously healed my emotional scars! As Toni led me in prayer, the Lord gently showed me those hurtful memories and spoke truth into each wound, cleansing every tender place in me. It’s hard to believe all the Holy Spirit did in those three days! But, suffice it to say that He miraculously removed the chains from my soul and completely set me free!
Niacinamide - Help For Your Brain
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ccording to the Alzheimer’s Association March 2013 Fact Sheet, every 68 seconds, someone in the U.S. develops Alzheimer’s. That is disturbing! There are a lot of things you can do to prevent Alzheimer’s. But many already have the symptoms of dementia and need help in acquiring a better quality of life. When my mom displayed these symptoms, we started giving her B vitamins. We saw signs of improvement in her mental acuity, but at that time, her doctor was unaware of the research being done with niacinamide. However, Mom’s improved quality of life motivated me to do further study. I learned that much research was being carried out effectively on mice in the search for help with this debilitating disease. Niacinamide was found to bring the mice “back to the level where they’d be if they didn’t have the pathology. It actually improved behavior in non-demented animals, too.” The Alzheimer’s Association of Medicine & Scientific Advisory Council stated that this new study is “intriguing,” but people should be cautious and not assume that “more is better” when it comes to possible treatments, even ones that appear to be safe. It’s true that more isn’t always better, but you don’t have to wait around for more research before you reap the benefits of this vitamin breakthrough. Niacinamide has been safely used for over 60 years for many purposes. The results of the animal study are so strong that it gives hope that Alzheimer’s may be treatable in humans by the same means. If you want to do more research, check your local library for a copy of Dr. William Kaufman’s book, The Common Form of Niacinamide Deficiency Disease: Aniacinamidosis (published by Yale Univ. Press, 1943). In his book, Kaufman, who is an exceptionally thorough clinical researcher, lists a number of symptoms he observed in his patients who needed niacinamide:
HealthPoint “Memory impaired, attention easily distracted, can’t concentrate, feels as if in a mental fog, thought slowed, difficulty comprehending. “Unwarranted anxiety, lacks initiative, not cooperative, delays making decisions, evasive, dodges responsibility, starts projects and doesn’t finish them. “Frequently quarrelsome, mean, unreasonable, intolerant, opinionated, unhappy, can’t take a joke, and little things annoy.” He discovered that all of these symptoms, and many more, “disappeared or improved considerably” with the use of niacinamide. It should be noted that it also has a history of improving schizophrenia when taken with vitamin C. As well, it’s been shown to help with arthritis. Your health provider can help you determine how much your individual body needs. But, just so you know, Dr. Kaufman recommends l,000 milligrams three times a day. He said you should begin to see improvement in a matter of three or four weeks. And for some, their symptoms went away completely after three to four months. The downside is that their symptoms came back, and even worsened, within four months if they stopped taking niacinamide. Therefore, before you begin, you’ll need to decide if you’re willing to continue or not. Dr. Kaufman gives another caution and that is if you experience nausea, you should cut your dose in half, stating such folks usually have elevated liver enzymes and the full dose is too much for them to process. He also said that nausea had only occurred in less than ten out of several hundred of his patients over his many years of practice. And he added that he knew of no other adverse symptoms from taking it. Niacinamide is available in 500 and 1,000 milligram capsules and tablets, and it can be found at most health food stores. Another way to give your brain a boost is to eat more of the juicy berries like blackberries, raspberries, strawberries, blueberries, cherries, grapes, cranberries and currants.
Life’s Journey The Lord’s presence is with you at
all times. And understanding where you are in your walk with Him is extremely important! When you started your journey, God met and welcomed you into His kingdom. Before long you began to see your life, as you once knew it, begin to fade. And as you look forward to the “goal” of growing into all the Father has promised, it will greatly encourage and strengthen you. Even though it may not feel as though you’re moving ahead in your faith as quickly as you’d like, keep your eyes on Him. You’ll be better able to recognize your growth, knowing how far you’ve come. We never stop growing because the Christian life isn’t about reaching a destination. It’s not stagnant, but a life-long journey of trusting Christ. So the goal is the working out of our salvation (Phil.2:12), that we might stand before God one day clothed
with Christ’s perfection which we could never attain through our own efforts. But, as you continue on your journey, life happens. Does that mean the Lord has left you? Not at all! He is right there beside you through whatever is going on in your life. Actually, the difficulties that occur stimulate your growth. Think about it! What hardship in your life did you not survive? I’ve heard it said, “I know God won’t put more on me than I can handle, I just wish He didn’t have such a high opinion of me!” The truth is that the Lord does put more on us than we can handle so we will quit relying on ourselves and our own abilities, and depend on Him and His abilities! You need to recognize that your entire existence is the result of His grace, and He will never leave or forsake you. So, in the midst of any circumstance, remember that God is right there with you!
Living in Dependence
In late April, Bill attended a con-
ference in Baton Rouge where Frank Friedmann, John Lynch and Andrew Farley were the keynote speakers. Each man effectively shared the truth of how Jesus purchased freedom for us through His finished work on the cross. We are free, righteous, sanctified and justified, not because of what we’ve done, but because of what He did. However, many people have a tendency, now that they’re free, to try to do something for God. Quite a few Christians are so busy “doing,” they don’t take time to just “be.” It’s been said that we should be called “human doings,” not “human beings.” The number one thing Jesus gave His disciples to do was, love one another. It was a new order all together. But how does Christ intend for Christians to show that love? Unfortunately, many have set the Lord up as an example of behavior, but rather He is an example of method. How did Jesus do what He did?
Many answers have been given, but Christ Himself answered it in the book of John, saying, “I only speak what I hear the Father say,” “I only do what I see the Father do.” It was a life of dependence on His Father. God was living life through His Son. Dependence is the method Jesus used to live a sinless life in a sin-filled world. And this is God’s plan for each of us as well. As we depend on God, accessing His resources, for the words we speak and the actions we perform, we can live the life of freedom! And, we are to renew our mind (Rom.12:2), not to become righteous, but because we are righteous. As we walk out our dependence on God, our mind will be renewed, allowing us to grow in our relationship to Him. But remember, while God’s love is not measured by our obedience, rebellion will hamper our fellowship with Him. FYI, one of the resources we use in our three-day “Get Away” is the True Faced material, coauthored by John Lynch.