INSIDE TH IS ISSUE: Meet the Editor
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Man Reveals: Why I Cheated
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The SG Collection: Fiction for the Grown & Sexy
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Single Black Male: Uncensored
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Hollywood Deception
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Hair Wigs: A Fashion Accessory
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NFL Hotties
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All articles in this issue are written by Shelia M Goss and can not be reproduced without the author’s permission. Visit her website http://www.sheliagoss.com to contact her.
Hailey Barnes I want to thank Shelia Goss for bringing my character to life. This is the 2nd issue. This issue has interviews with a couple of men giving their viewpoint on dating and relationships. For those that didn’t read the 1st issue, a little about me. I’m an ex-model who now has the #2 Talk Show in my market, only behind, you know who. The Hailey Barnes Show has expanded some since readers got a chance to see Shelia’s characters from Double Platinum on my stage. R & B singer Parris and supersexy producer Casper were a hot couple. You’ll have to get your copy of HOLLYWOOD DECEPTION to find out if this celebrity couple is still together. Although I’m a fictional character, the articles in this issue are about real people. Real people who were willing to share their stories on topics that I love to discuss on my show. I hope you enjoy this second issue. P.S.—Don’t you just love how Shelia is marketing my story in Hollywood Deception. Pre-order your copy of Hollywood Deception now at http://www.sheliagoss.com. Hailey Barnes Find out more about me in Hollywood Deception by Shelia M Goss http://www.sheliagoss.com/books/womeninhollywoodseries/hollywood-deception/
Man Reveals Why I Cheated
Men and wondering how they think lead to great discussions on The Hailey Barnes Show. Shelia Goss interviewed several men for this issue. In the last issue, she spoke with women who were cheated on. In this issue, readers are introduced to Sam, a man who has been on both the giving and receiving end of a cheating relationship. Sam, did your ex-girlfriend cheat on you or did you cheat on her first? I got cheated on. I’m not sure if she committed the physical act first, but mentally she cheated. I know it's very cliche to say, but after that happened, the way I looked at her and relationships changed. It sounds like this was a turning point in your life in regards to relationships. I cheated because I got cheated on, plain and simple. I think I could've been the nicest guy in the world, but I can really say that "she" created a monster. But truthfully, I thank her for that life experience. Did u feel bad about it or have any remorse for cheating on her? No remorse; I felt smart. I felt like a weight had being lifted off my chest. Did your EX catch you cheating? She didn't catch me; I told her. I wanted her to feel the pain that I felt not only when she cheated but when she lied about cheating. For the record, this isn't double standard or anything, but when women cheat, it's worse because with women it's a mental and physical thing, so I doubt I would ever truly get back at her. Let’s back track for a minute. How did you find out she was cheating on you? Well, she would always walk to my dorm room, but on this particular day I wanted to be nice and pick her up from the bus stop. Everything happens for a reason right. So I go there and I find her in a crowd chit chatting among a bunch dudes. To make matters worse, later on, like ten dudes show up to my dorm room. I guess they followed us and one of them calls for her to come to the door. She looks at dude, then looks at me and gets up and goes to the door and grabs a piece of paper from him. The interaction was iffy. I asked, “What was that about?” She responds, “He knows my friend. He wants me to pass the number along.” But it was written in her eyes that I lost her. After that incident, we fought about every little thing and eventually she told me she cheated on me.
MAN REVEALS Continued
Did the experience with her affect how you felt about women in general? Oh yeah, I was scarred for life or maybe I should say I became smarter. When you get cheated on, you automatically start having these insecure thoughts about what you did wrong and how you can't measure up and aren't good enough and that can eat away at a person. I went through all those stages but to the point of being comfortably numb. I started having certain rules: • Cheat before you get cheated on. • Make sure you control the balance of the relationship (which actually means don't get emotionally invested). • The less feelings you have the more control you have. What signs should women look for that their man might be cheating? Ha!!! Are you serious with this question? Females are the new and improved males, they care less, cheat more and never get caught. But I'll humor you, because not all women cheat. There's a difference between a smart man that cheats and a dumb one. But for the most part they both protect their biggest asset—the cell phone. If you're in a committed relationship, your phone should never be locked. Once your man is locking his phone, a female should know she has competition. And if you can't pry that cell phone away, the fact that he sleeps with it or gets really jumpy when you ask to use it, he's cheating. But does this really matter though? Women will stay with a cheating man for various reasons and use love as their alibi. “You know he's cheating on you right"..."But I love him..." Funny thing, isn't it? I can say this and I have no evidence to support my claim; men got "caught" cheating first, but I'm pretty sure women were the first ones to cheat!!
Readers what do you think? Do you think women are better cheaters than men? Can one bad relationship ruin a man for the next woman for life? Why or Why not? Leave your response on today’s blog post over on www.sheliagoss.com/blog.
Shelia Goss Book Collection Fiction for the Grown & Sexy http://www.kensingtonbooks.com or http://www.sheliagoss.com
Young Adult Books http://www.thelipglosschronicles.com
SingleBlackMale.org is a site by four Black men who write about dating, relationships and everything else in between. Dr. J, one of the contributors of the site, answered a few questions for this issue. In your opinion, what's the one misconception women have about men? Controversial as it may sound, the biggest misconception is that men are selfish. It’s just not true. Everything about a man is a process or method of leading a man to being able to provide, to give. Our vice in life is different than women and has been for all of mankind. We are competitive, stronger, and we are overly obsessed with our legacy. We get a great education and then a great job, so that we can afford nice things; a house, a car, lavish gifts, and the image of wealth. The reason why we do all of this is to attract the opposite sex for marriage and procreation. A man wouldn’t do any of that stuff if he could have the women without doing it.
SINGLE BLACK MALE
Are you afraid of commitment? Yes, but not for the reason you think. I think I am worried that I will not maximize my potential. Most people think it’s about freedom. However, if a man is positive, 100% positive, that he can do no better, he’s very likely to embrace commitment. It’s only when a man is worried he’s settling and something better could come along. How can women make themselves more approachable? What type of women? LOL. Just kidding. Be pleasant and optimistic. I’ll explain. Some women walk around as if they know some guy is going to talk to them and waste their time. Most men are perfectly happy with a hello or a smile. If you are meeting guys who aren’t able to exchange and smile and a greeting and leave it at that, I’d suggest you stop frequenting those places. Be optimistic. Some women have a certain esteem about themselves; as if they are sure that men aren’t up to any good. It makes them defensive. People who are always on the defense aren’t going to be approached. What are some signs women should look for that a man is "just not into them?" When a man is not into a woman, he does not make her a priority. Every woman that I’ve ever been really into, I’ve gone above and beyond to make time for. It’s not about calling, emailing, or dates out on the town. It’s not about whether he calls or texts, or if he only wants to hang out at his place and never in public. It’s about if he considers the woman a priority. Is he willing to cancel drinks with the fellas to make it to drinks with the woman? Will he adjust his schedule to meet the woman? Will he stick to his plans even when it may be hard to keep them with the woman? How does he prepare for meeting this woman? These are the important signs that a woman should look for. If she doesn’t feel that she’s a priority in his life, she either isn’t or he isn’t giving her the attention she needs, either way she should move on.
Single Black Male Continued
A few Facebook fans had questions for the men. Their answers are on this page. Why can't y'all act right? We ask ourselves the same question. The answer? Because you guys don’t require that we act right. What's the real reason why men cheat? Men cheat because they can. Take away a man’s ability to cheat and he won’t cheat. I know a woman whose boyfriend was from Connecticut and he constantly cheated on her. She moved to California and told him to move in with her and then she also demanded that he get a full time job with regular hours. This man basically has no chance of cheating because his only friend is her and his only free time is spent with her. An exaggerated example, but that’s really the only way you can stop it from happening. If a man wants to cheat and he can, he will.
If you ever want to know what men think—whether it be why do they leave the toilet seat up to why are some men afraid of commitment—be sure to book mark SingleBlackMale.org. New posts are posted daily. Ladies, do you have any comments on Dr. J’s responses? Any other questions you may have that you want me to ask in the future? Leave your response on today’s blog post over on www.sheliagoss.com/blog.
HOLLYWOOD DECEPTION By Shelia M. Goss Two friends, one woman, and one deranged fan. Former supermodel and talk show host Hailey Barnes has a knack for catching her guests off guard with difficult and personal questions. Her tough interviews have earned her a Daytime Emmy, but while her professional life is at its peak, she’s not satisfied with her personal life. Hailey wants what she can’t have, and that’s her ex-college sweetheart’s hand in marriage. Her on again/off again relationship with Trevon keeps her name in the tabloids, and that works for her, until she receives a wedding invitation in the mail—inviting her to Trevon’s wedding to another woman. He’s ready to settle down, just not with Hailey. Besides dealing with a broken heart, the ex-supermodel is dealing with a deranged fan who has resorted to sending her disturbing mail at her Hollywood studio and her home. Hailey decides to use the opportunity as a quest to convince Trevon she should be his bride. Trevon and childhood friend Garrett Morgan are co-owners of GT Securities, a security firm that caters to celebrities. Hailey’s plan backfires when Garrett heads her case instead of Trevon. When explayboy Garrett starts developing feelings for Hailey, Hailey’s life becomes even more complicated. As Garrett investigates, all evidence points to the person Hailey least suspects. With fans like this, who needs enemies? HOLLYWOOD DECEPTION - In Stores everywhere April 2010 http://www.sheliagoss.com Available to Order Now from any of the following retailers:
Hair Wigs A Fashion Accessory If you would have asked me five years ago about wearing wigs or hair weave, I would have looked at you crazy. It only took one bad experience at a hairdresser and my mind changed. Now that I am trying to grow my hair out and not use a curling iron on it on a daily basis, I’m an advocate for wigs. Wigs are a great fashion accessory. Reasons why I love wearing wigs: 1. Convenience – I don’t have to mess with my hair every morning. I can just brush my hair and attach and go. I get a relaxer every six weeks and I wash and condition my hair weekly. 2. Style Versatility – If I’m wearing wigs, I can change my hair on a daily basis to match my mood. I also like wearing different hair styles and wearing wigs offer that option instead of having to run to the hair salon every other day. It’s also great to add color to your hair style without worrying about damaging your hair. 3. Savings – Although a good wig may cost money; it’s still cheaper than going to the beauty salon. If you take care of a wig, it can have a long life span. I normally keep a wig for about two to three months but some I only wear once a week. Tips on picking out the best wig for you: Always try the wig on before purchasing them. 1. Wigs come in a variety of lengths and colors. I prefer the half wigs because I can blend them in with my real hair and it gives it a natural look. 2. Synthetic hair or human hair – it depends on the brand, whether the synthetic hair looks real. Synthetic hair is normally cheaper than human hair. Once you learn what style or brand looks good on you, you can shop for wigs online. I shop at three stores here locally and I can get real good deals on wigs made out of human hair for the same price as a wig made with synthetic hair. 3. Lace front wigs are the new fad. This is another option. If you wear a lace front wig, whether synthetic hair or human hair, no one can tell it’s a wig.
HAIR WIGS Continued
How to maintain your natural hair while wearing wigs: 1. Wash and condition your hair regularly 2. Daily maintenance includes combing, brushing and for some people using daily oil moisturizers. 3. Protect your hair by using a satin stocking cap before putting on the wig. I usually wrap my hair and then use the stocking cap. Some people put their hair up in a rubber band. I opted not to do that when I noticed some of my hair in the rubber band.
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Note: All articles in this issue are written by Shelia M Goss and can not be reproduced without the author’s permission. Visit her website http://www.sheliagoss.com to contact her.
NFL Hotties
Darren Sharper
Reggie Bush
Pierre Thomas