The Dog
And, of course, photos were sent over the internet. The photos showed a white, rat-like, animal with large black splotches on its body. But, it was the smashed-mouth head, with the buggy eyes and hooked tail, which made it such a cute thing. She was primarily white, not common coloration for Bostons. Seems the breeder thought she was on to something, so she selected the white coat gene. Unfortunately, the “standard” of the breed is not a white-coated Boston. DUH! So, she was stuck with a bunch of white lab-rat dogs that she couldn’t get rid of. So, she pawned all of them off on the “rescue” group in Texas. We just HAD to have one. My wife went to pick this dog up at the airport. She had previously determined that the dog would be called “Scout,” after a character in To Kill a Mockingbird. I have never read the novel, so it didn’t matter to me. So, Scout it was. And Scout came home in a carrier that weighed more than she did. The moment of her arrival was supposed to be shrouded in secrecy, so she wasn’t mobbed by adoring children. That, of course, didn’t work. Word leaked out. It was like the night before the Oscars. Everything was abuzz. The media trucks were lined up outside the house. The tabloids were flooding the telephone lines. The neighbors were lined up around the block. Okay, not really. But, the family was quite excited. Gabe, of course, had no idea what was about to befall him. What has befallen Gabe, and the rest of the family, is a little tiny sprite of a dog, with a smooth coat and soft underbelly and a dark coloration on her lower lip that makes her appear to be pouting all the time. It’s a very photogenic sort of thing. She has the same hooked tail as Gabe, and the same buggy little eyes. One eye, however, has a blue tint to it, which sets it off against the dark brown eye on the other side. She has the courage of a lion and the bladder of a mouse. Sure, she is tough. But, she pisses all over the carpets and bedspreads. We take her out into the backyard and she pees and poops, like a good little doggie. We bring her back into the house, thinking that she is on empty. But, that’s not how puppies work, I guess. Five minutes later, she craps on the carpet and pees again. I’m not sure whether there is ever a break in the conveyor belt, from her tiny mouth to her tiny butt. Stuff just keeps moving through, at a steady pace. And, like Gabe, she has afflictions. I’m sure we haven’t discovered them all, yet, but the one we have discovered threatens to kill her. She’s allergic to bee stings! Her little head blows up like her mouth is attached to a helium tank, and she has trouble breathing because of her shortened nasal passage. So, we have to watch her like a hawk when she’s outdoors, so she doesn’t stumble Embodied Effigies | 115