North Carolina Miscellany
N C L R ONLINE
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Those open swims at the lake were scary at first. My mind would fight me, using fear to cloud my judgement. Was that a snake or a stick? Could anyone hear me if I called for help? What if I couldn’t make it? Could they reach me in time?
water displacement, so we just enjoy the splashing for now. After that long weekend with my family, I thought through their answers. Tara’s answer stuck with me: “Surely, I’ve already done that by now.” I had not considered that I had already saved someone. And as I reflected on my past, it occurred to me, I had. Two people actually. There is also no record of how many people I taught to swim, but I would safely say twenty, and that is a lifesaving skill. I will not even try to calculate the lives that my defensive driving has saved, but they no doubt add up to a very large number. Those open swims at the lake were scary at first. My mind would fight me, using fear to cloud my judgement. Was that a snake or a stick? Could anyone hear me if I called for help? What if I couldn’t make it? Could they reach me in time? Being unaided in vast open water provoked anxiety that had to be dealt with, or, at least, moved around until I could release it. Even in the face of drowning alone, I was compelled to continue. All worst-case scenarios had been thought through and planned for. For safety, I would swim twenty yards offshore, so in the event of a cramp, I could thrash my way to the shallow water, but far enough out that my feet would never
graze the slimy bottom. Also, boats don’t usually go fast close to shore, so I could avoid the death by motor scenario. The idea of being diced by a propeller was stomach turning. Blood and body parts everywhere. Nope, not today because I had an exit plan. I mean, what are the chances of a deer swimming across and trampling over me in the water? I refocused my attention on the beautiful surroundings. Once I became comfortable and calmed my racing heartbeat from the anxiety of the unknown, I knocked out quarter miles without a problem. Later, I eased my way into mile-length swims and the freedom I found there was as close to meditation as I have ever come. The rhythm of my breath, the weightlessness of my body moving through a liquid space, visibly looking down into darkness with moments of light coming through with each head turn, and the incredible moments of silence. Unless, of course, something touched my leg, and then I would somehow propel my body out of the water with the speed of a wet cat. “What was that?” I screamed to myself because no one could hear me. But then, after verifying I was not being attacked by some unknown creature, I regained my composure, took in a breath, and pushed my way forward. One stroke at a time. n
