A family built on heart

Abby and Michael Larson thrive under the demands of raising 10 children

BY ALISON STUCKE PHOTOGRAPHY BY AYLA ANDROSKY

Abigail (Abby) and Michael Larson’s tale is a love story of a woman, a man, and 10 children. Eleven, if you count their granddaughter. Yes, they have 10 children, from ages 4 to 22. Their house is hopping busy and bursting with love every day.

But if you call Abby a “Supermom,” she’ll quickly and modestly respond, “I have lots of help, and I couldn’t do it without that support.” Yet she truly does seem super as she gives love and care to her large family and keeps track of everyone’s daily schedule.

The three oldest children are Michael’s, and the younger seven are Abby’s (three are her biological children, three are permanent foster children, and one was adopted).

“We try our best to always refer to them all as ‘ours’,” Abby said.

How Their Story Started

Their story began in 2003 when Abby and Michael were both on active duty in the Army and deployed in support of Operation Enduring Freedom. Abby is a nurse, and Michael is a nurse anesthetist. They were part of a group of six friends who met every evening to eat together, and they celebrated holidays together.

“When you’re in the service, you create your own family with other service people where you’re stationed,” Abby said.

Both Abby and Michael were married to other people at that time. They stayed in touch sporadically over the next 12 years. At Christmastime 2015, Michael sent Abby a message asking if her Facebook photo of a multitude of Christmas stockings hung on the fireplace were for her and her husband’s children. “Do you really have that many children?” Michael asked. Abby messaged back that they were, indeed, her children’s

Christmas stockings, but that she and her husband had divorced. Michael informed her that he, too, had divorced since they last communicated. It was the start of something new.

“Ever since we got together, we’ve been inseparable. It was a whirlwind romance — very fast,” Abby said. “We were engaged after 10 months, and we married six months later in May 2017.” Their new family counted 12 members.

The Children

Amazingly, five of the eight children are within 18 months of each other in age. Abby lists off the children’s ages:

• A son, 22, in college with a 2-year-old daughter

• A daughter, 19, in the Air Force, stationed in California

• A son, 12, in seventh grade

• A son, 12, in sixth grade

• A daughter, 11, in sixth grade with special needs

• A son, 11, in fifth grade

• A daughter, 11, in fourth grade with special needs

• A daughter, 8, in third grade

• A daughter, 5, in kindergarten with special needs

• A daughter, 4, in pre-K with special needs

And don’t forget Winston, Michael’s service dog.

“The house is either very loud or very quiet,” Abby said. “The children are super independent and good at selfentertaining, but they enjoy playing together equally as much.”

Uniting As A Family

So how did they combine two families to make one big, happy family? Abby and her children moved from the Twin Cities into Michael’s five-bedroom home in northern Minnesota. Michael’s three children made the adjustment to being in a much larger family; Abby’s children easily adapted to include more siblings.

The family is diverse in many ways. Their foster and adopted children have developmental, neurological and medical special needs. Michael is in a wheelchair from a diving accident he sustained in 2004 while on active duty.

“The children are very accepting of each other,” Abby said. “They have never not known what it’s like to be around people with special needs, so they don’t even see it in others. The children without delays are so patient with the children with delays. It’s a real blessing.”

Even though they’re a diverse group, they are a unified team when it comes to being a family.

“Michael guides the children step by step, providing for them in many ways.” Abby said. “He shows an incredible amount of patience, love and support.”

Organization Is The Key

“You would think it would be very crazy and overwhelming, and at times it is,” Abby said. “But if we stay organized and things are status quo, it kind of just flows.”

They couldn’t function, Abby said, without the detailed calendar that sits on the counter. It tells who needs to be where, at what time, and with what gear. It keeps track of all activities, medical appointments, basketball games and practices, gymnastics classes, etc.

“If it’s not in the book, it doesn’t happen,” Abby said, laughing. “I can’t mentally keep track of everything on the schedule.” continued on page 19

Abby’s days are also mapped out on the calendar. Some days, she said, she’s booked from 8 a.m. to 8:30 p.m. with appointments and activities for the children. She starts her day at 6:30 with a cup of coffee and waking up children so they can get ready for school, and she ends her day around 11, usually falling asleep as she plays word games on her phone so her mind doesn’t think about what she needs to do the next day.

Organization of chores is also a must in running a household this large.

“You have to be organized with 10 children,” Abby said. “We keep chore charts and a laundry schedule. Every child has their own laundry basket. We grocery shop in bulk. Everything is plan ahead, buy ahead.”

Abby does all the cooking. Michael is a “foodie,” so he’ll come up with recipes to try, and Abby prepares them. Recipes are always doubled or tripled to make enough for everyone.

Support From Family And Friends Is Critical

Abby said she and Michael couldn’t possibly get everything done without the help of family members, friends and professionals, including their daughters’ patient care assistants and nurse.

“We have a lot of help,” she explained. “Plus, we have support from both sides of our family, including mine and Michael’s parents. Family support and family acceptance are critical. Without that, doing what we do would be very difficult. And without coffee, it would be impossible.”

ABBY’S LOVE FOR CHILDREN

It was through a big heart that Abby was the mother of seven children before marrying Michael.

“Growing up, I always loved children,” she said. “I babysat for everyone I could since I was 10 years old, and I worked in the church nursery.”

Abby always dreamed of having six children. “Five boys and one girl, in that order,” she said.

When Abby was pregnant with the first of her three biological children, she worked in pediatric home care. “It was something I didn’t even know existed. I ended up working in a medical foster home, and decided it was something I wanted to do.”

She became a licensed foster care provider for children with medical needs. She has taken in 19 foster children over the past 10 years, all with some form of medical, neurological or developmental challenges. She found her three permanent foster children and her adopted daughter through that experience.

“People would ask me, ‘Isn’t it sad that the children are sick?’ But the children and I don’t see it that way. This is their life, and they make the best of it. Why not celebrate every day and give them all the love you can?”

Loving Their New Lives

Abby loves her busy days with her family. Michael and the children are also glad they’re all together as one big family.

“I am so blessed to have my husband and our children,” Abby said. “They’re great children, and they truly are amazing. They make me a better person.” — MDT