THE RED DRESS

Maria was waiting when we arrived for her June 18, appointment. Standing outside her little room.she was wearing a pretty red dress. We had not seen her in red before. Blue is her favorite and she always had worn that color. Her face was made up nicely, her hair a mass of curls from her recent perm. She had lost more weight, per Dr. Foster’s orders, and was definitely emerging from her lifelong prison of embarrassment and shame. When we complimented her on her looks her hand went up to shield a moment of shyness. With the gift of $15, from Meg and Laurie, Maria had bought the dress at a swap meet.” It is my first new dress. I could not find a blue one. Do you like this color?” It was perfect. There was that ‘’new “ business again. 30 years old and just now wearing a new dress. I felt sad thinking about her past life. All that was changing now thanks to her many new friends. Marge had brought a large bag of salad greens, apricots, cabbage, and her special salad dressing. Maria loved that dressing when she visited our home. She also brought a candy bar for the boys to share. After your baths, their mother said. I brought several sacks of clothing for her business out front.” I sold 5 ceramic cups last week, for $2 each. Also, some clothes.” Our sonin-law will be pleased to know that his work is spreading around Mexico. He does wonderful artwork also. There are many homes in the Tijuana area that have items from his kiln.” Boys, take your baths and get to school on time. And, behave! “ Dona Emilia will watch and make sure they get off on time. The trip to the border is quick. Many of Maria’s friends saw her once again.” Good luck Maria, have a safe trip. “She knows them all. It seems the treatment we receive from the INS is different each time we go to secondary. 40

They seem to enjoy changing their rules and procedures each trip. What was ok last time is not this time. Maria is allowed entry but it seems begrudging. Marge wonders if they do not want Mexicans to enter the US for help. Regardless, she is coming here for aid and will continue to until she no longer requires medical attention. She is being cared for through the kindness of many who give to the Village.

“I know that man, he has helped me often at the border. “She was referring to a Mexican attempting to get his papers in order. I talked with him later outside. I thanked him for all of his kindness.

Five minutes later and we arrived at IHOP. New and serving very good food, it was perfect for our lunch. I had told Maria not to eat breakfast.” Are you hungry?” A little bit she replied. Since she was to have two appointments, the salad would be best for her. We all ordered chicken fajita salads. While waiting for the food we engaged in her favorite pastime; chatting. When Marge had talked with Felix earlier this week about the braces she again thanked him for the $5 he gave Maria at her first appointment.” Marge, that was not $5 I gave Maria, rather $100. Dr. Foster gave me the money for her with the instructions that the gift came from “above.” I told Maria not to tell anyone of the gift.” She did not. I asked her how large was the bill she received from Felix.

“It was ten dollars. I did not know what Felix gave me. I had never seen this money. When I arrived home that day I showed Dona Emilia and asked her what it was. She replied that it was a very large sum of money, almost 800 pesos. I was shocked. Please Emilia, keep it safe for me. The next day I replaced the $4 I took from the $20 Jaime gave me and gave it to Emilia. I now have $120 toward my lot. I want to help also.” This land will probably cost thousands of dollars, yet, she maintains such optimism. She is certain it will happen. As we ate the excellent salads, we continued our conversation. We told her that we met Fr. Bruno at her church.

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She likes him and said that he had baptized both boys. Fr. Bruno will be an important friend to us all. “When are you and Magie coming to my house for dinner? The next time I will be better prepared.” I told her that the Fall will be more comfortable weatherwise. “ I will make chile relleno and the angelfish. Also, I will buy the wine.” Look, my friend, we will make out a menu and decide who brings what. I will bring the wine and bread. Magie will bring the salad and dressing. Ok?” “What is that word menu?” Oh, God, what a sheltered life! Yet she is very aware of raising the boys and surviving these past 30 years. She ate all her salad and refused any dessert. It was time to go. We were to meet Diana at the Village. I told Maria and she was excited to meet the lady who gave her” new “ beds.

Diana was waiting for us at Vincent dePaul when we arrived. She and Maria hit it off well, despite the language barrier. Maria’s personality often overcomes her lack of English. We went into the courtyard to chat while Marge signed Maria in at the desk. Unfortunately, Felix could not finish the braces for today and was not there. The important appointment with the ob-gyn still stood. At 4 pm, or thereabouts. the doctor breezed in. A tall, beautiful, black lady, with an accent that you would die for. Carolle JeanMurat, originally from Haiti, now working in SD, is virtually a prisoner of St.Vincent dePaul Village! Her manner is as perfect as her Spanish. She was what the Village had been dreaming for. And, she is famous and an author! Maria was delighted with” la Doctora. “The amination was concluded in short order. Thank God.

Marge received the information about Maria. It was nothing serious. “Keep a record and I want to see you again in 3 months.” Maria has another appointment for June 26. This time with Felix and Dr. Foster.

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It was getting late as we headed back to Otay. The boys would be home soon. [5:30] Maria has decided not to chat while I am driving. The traffic is heavy and we both get nervous. While trying to understand her, most of my brain cells are busy. As we neared the border I asked Marge if we should stop at MacDonald’s for an ice cream sundae. “Sure,” I asked Maria if she would like ice cream. She hesitated but I already knew her answer. A chocolate sundae with nuts on top. Was this her first? I’ve lost track of these events. It was soon gone and we were off to her Otay. Our’s is Otay Mesa; her’s is Mesa Otay.” My diet is gone today. Please do not tell Dr. Foster “Not a chance, my friend. The boys were waiting for their mother. They were full of it and very silly. Marge said it must be the chocolate candy. The birds all greeted her with friendly screen has. At this time I gave her a bag of tostadas, large, thin, tortillalike chips.

They were called “Pericos”, parakeets. Just like her three. The boys attacked them like crazy. Jose Luis, the parakeet, ate some. The other two did not. Maria had a bit. The diet was a shambles. The boys were firing words at me nonstop.” What is this in English? What is that word in English?” I will bring you more words in English next week. Ok? “Yes.” We will see you Thursday at noon. We love you, Maria.

IHOP June 26.

Felix’s office called at the last moment; he went homesick and cannot meet with Maria today. After all the trouble Marge went to getting the INS letter, suggested that we bring Maria over anyway. I asked her if she would like to come over for a few hours. Of course, she would! The boys were playing soccer in front and readily helped me unload the car. Marge had brought another supply of salad greens, bananas, and cherries. I brought several bags of 43

clothing for her to sell. “Sunday I sold the large ceramic vase for $7, and other things. I now have $145 for my lot. I made $15 last week. No linea for me. Before I did not understand how to price things and bargain with the people. Now I am learning how to sell. When I go to the border that money will be for my lot. At my house, that money will be for food. I must forget my embar assessment at the border because I want to buy my lot. Downtown Tijuana was not good for me. The tourists were busy buying things. I did not receive much money. Otay linea is better.”

Maria was wearing another pretty red dress. “This dress is used I bought it four years ago.” It looked new. She takes very good care of her things. She always bathes and does her hair in the am, so as to look her best for selling things, going to the clinic, or to the border. The boys always look scrubbed and dressed in clean clothes. “Manuel’s “T” shirt is two years old. “It looked new also. Since Christmas, the boys have grown taller and their weight is perfect in my eyes. Maria’s diet is also effective. Dr. Foster will be very pleased with her.

Once again at the border, her friends greeted her with smiles and good wishes. Our experience at secondary was almost pleasant. The first time! The agent actually asked about our experience with Maria at Vincent dePaul. “Many people come down to Mexico to do good things. “We were amazed at this. He wished us all good luck when we left. Maria thanked him. She easily picked up on the friendliness in his voice. Today our appointment is at IHOP, my friend. It is a secret. Why waste a chance to bring her up. Each time we enter and leave the car Maria goes through a strenuous lifting and balancing act. Marge or I always hold her bolsita, [little purse]. We make a big deal holding it. I say it is mine or, how much money do you have. She always has some money with her. And, usually offers to pay for something. On this trip, Maria did not want much to eat. She settled for a scoop of ice 44

cream with strawberries. But why? “My last time here I ate so much salad and then the ice cream at MacDonald’s, I could not sleep that night. Manuel woke up and asked me, ‘what’s wrong mommy, did you eat too much again over there? ‘My stomach.” I am sorry Maria, we should not have stopped at MacD. In my desire to treat her, I overdid it.

We chatted, naturally, while we had lunch. Fanny, the waitress, has become our friend. She asks the manager if she can wait at our table. She is very nice to Maria and describes the food selections for her. She even took her to the ladies’ room. The doors are very heavy and difficult for her to open. Maria always uses one of my towels to cover her legs when in public. She is so friendly and smiley that I doubt if anyone ever notices her crippled legs. I see the broken, almost useless braces, but I never see her legs.” This is so much work for you and Magie. Coming to my house these many times. Rancho Bernardo is so far. “We are friends Maria. do not worry about the trips.”How much will my braces cost? They will be very expensive.” Felix is doing everything for free. There is no cost. If they were to cost, it would be $1200.That really floored her. She has one $100 bill. Now she can picture 12 of those bills. Everything is at no cost; the doctors, Vincent dePaul, Felix!

She must wonder why she is receiving all of this aid. Who knows? We met by accident. A lady in a wheelchair with a styrofoam cup, two boys playing off to the side. If we can improve one’s life a small amount, that is our goal. I believe Mother Teresa advocates that philosophy.

‘’30 people live in the house next to my room. They come up from Chiapas. They are buying many clothes from me. There are many children and they need clothes. The adults pay a little rent and work in the factories.” A good deal for Maria. Marge asked Maria if she still had any salad dressing left. She had a little and was guarding it carefully. The boys are using it on everything. Rice, 45

beans, potatoes, and even the lettuce! Maria wants the recipe. It is a simple mixture and Marge will get it for her. I think sugar is a big attraction.

I asked Maria if I could cut a small piece of her wheelchair cushion.

Marge has found a man who will make a new one for her. We need a sample of the foam interior. Our neighbor in the back, Jane, said she will buy Maria a cushion. The generosity never ends.

Maria, I think you should call Inmobiliaria again about your land. These government organizations tend to forget or put aside such requests. “ Tomorrow, I will go to see the people.

Manuel will help me and we will take a taxi. “It is a long ride to Agua Caliente, the location of Inmo.”The taxi only costs $6 pesos each way.” A good deal for her; about $1.50.” I will use tears if necessary when I speak with the gentleman. “ That mind; she remembers from her experience with the ID card. Once we know the cost of the land, the wheels can begin turning.

Maria said she will talk to Dona Emilia about the land costs and her experiences with her house. Emilia built her house all by herself; room by room. Each room was a new project and a different style. The building inspectors over here would go crazy with the way people build in Mexico. Permits, fees, blueprints; forget it!

As the afternoon was drawing to a close we started back to #35. Maria noticed that Marge was favoring her back. It tends to “go out “ at times. Very uncomfortable for her.”Oh, I know of a medicine that will help your back, Magie. I will buy some for you.” Marge persisted and said she already had medicine.”This is a very good salve, it is made from bee venom. I will buy you some.”We both argued, no, no, we have medicine. It remains to be seen if she wi l l buy it anyway. Maria desperately wishes to give to us. Something, anything! “You and Magie have given me so much. I have given nothing.” Our answer is always the same, your friendship is enough. 46

Maria received a friendly welcome when we arrived back at her house; three parakeets, two boys, and Emilia. Cat, the cat also walked slowly into the room. I guess that was some type of welcome from him.

Call me on July 3, and we hope to have the next date with Felix. She waved and threw us kisses from her doorway as we pulled away. I’m certain her next act was to hobble over to Emilia’s side fence and give her all the details of her most recent trip to the US; her IHOP appointment.

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