Gmeaumpeau The menu
Sthwoppe The Soup
Ciachmuorgn Salmon
Pbhoeu Beef
GM as in phlegm EAU – beauchamp MP – comptroller EAU as in beauty
STH as in isthmus WO as in two PPE as in flapped
PB – cupboard HOE – diarrhea U – lieutenant
Stphoobdsc Spuds
Gheigh Pie
C – cell IA – special C HM – drachm UO – liquor GN – reign Queaphig Coffee
ST – thistle PH – shepherd OO – blood BD – bdellium SC – science
GH – hiccough EIGH – height
QUE – cheque A – was PH – sapphire IG-signore
TI – question IS – debris SI – business
Tiissi Cheese
Spelling as a joke Comic strips like to have spelling as a target. ‘Now Catherine, spell Kangaroo.’ ‘Cangaru.’ ‘That’s not how the dictionary spells it.’ ‘You didnt ask me how the dictionary spells it.’ Worker: I couldn’t work yesterday, I had diarrhoea. Boss: You could have sent me a note. Worker: But I couldn’t spell it. NUBBIN: A child writes: ‘There! I’ve spelled it right . . . now, if I can just figger out how to pronounce it.’ HAGAR’s little boy writes: ‘During the Dark Ages all learning disapered disipired disapirred dizappeared died out.’ NANCY at school: ‘Nancy, write the word Psalm.’ She writes Salm. ‘Wrong. It starts with a P.’ Nancy: ‘It psertainly pseems like a psilly way to pspell.’ CAF: ‘I can’t understand why he can’t spell!’ says a mother in a supermarket with cartons labelled Wite-Brite, Sno-Boy, Supa Lo & Lite and Woppa-Stoppa. A caveman cartoon shows a librarian: ‘Just remember 88