HUSBANDS LOVE YOUR WIVES

Ephesians 5:25-29: “Husbands, love your wives, as Christ loved the church and gave Himself up for her, that He might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word, so that He might present the church to Himself in splendor, without spot or wrinkle or any such thing, that she might be holy and without blemish.”

Marriage is a lifetime decision, and this is the reason why “till death do us part” is part of the vows recited when couples wed. It is sad that a few years after making such commitment to one another, problems begin to arise between the couple. One of the major contributors to the alarming rate of divorce and unhappiness in marriage is that men are rarely taught how to handle women. Women are taught to be wives from a very early age especially in Africa while men are never taught to be husbands. Many great men have failed their wives because no one has equipped the young boys with the right teaching of handling the beautiful, sensitive creature called woman.

The Word of God instructs every husband to LOVE his wife, not his girlfriend, but his wife, always wishing for the best for her.

Colossians 3:19 “Husbands, love your wives [with an affectionate, sympathetic, selfless love that always seeks the best for them] and do not be embittered or resentful toward them [because of the responsibilities of marriage.]

It is sad that some men are happy and jovial everywhere else except at home with their wives. They are polite and kind to everyone else except with their wives. The moment he sees his wife even the contours of his face become tense, his smile or laughter is not known by his wife. Before marriage the same man used to speak with a gentle, adoring voice but today the only way he addresses his wife is with harshness, anger, and any other negative emotion. Some men cannot spend a few hours with their wives, they are always busy, and they spend more time with friends, their homes are like filling stations, places to eat, refresh and sleep. There is never a meaningful, relaxed conversation between some couples. There are many women who are trapped in loveless marriages, at times holding on for the sake of their children, society as well as economic reasons.

Some of these husbands are cruel enough not to allow their wives to work or to start small ventures. Life is unpredictable and unless you have opened a bank account where you are saving money for your wife and children, please allow her to be independent financially. When you are not around to fend for your family or in the event that you are unable to work, she will be able to run around and put food on the table for your family. Many women struggle when the husband passes on because they relied on the husband 100%. A good husband will make sure he equips his wife for tomorrow. He secures the future for his family and tries hard to establish his wife.

1 Peter 3:7

Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

A husband is instructed to love his wife, to understand her and treat her as the weaker vessel so his prayers may be answered. Sometimes the hindrance in the life of a married man is the wife. Treat your wife with love, consider her, do your best as a husband, and see if the Lord will not open doors for you.

WAYS TO TREAT YOUR WIFE!

1. Support Her

Learn to support your wife in anything she may be doing. If you do not agree with her decisions, tell her why you are not in agreement and allow her to explain why she chose to take that path. If she insists allow her to make her own mistakes. Some men feel threatened when their wife wants to further her education or venture into business. We live in unpredictable times; it is important for a husband to support his wife to become financially independent to contribute financially to the home. It is important for every woman to have her own source of income in case something happens in the future and the husband is unable to provide for the family. Wisdom always prepares for tomorrow. There are women suffering today because of husbands who refused to allow them to work.

2. Appreciate Her

Adam appreciated Eve when God brought Eve to him. He declared with excitement “This is the borne of my bone and the flesh of my flesh.” Having spent time with animals, it was no surprise that Adam was excited to have Eve as a life partner. Every woman wants to be appreciated. Learn to complement your wife, make her feel important. Surprise her occasionally and take her out.

3. Plan with Her

Involve your wife in your plans. Plan together when it comes to decisions that involve the family. Get her ideas and decide together. The Bible says the two shall become one flesh meaning that in everything there is oneness.

4. Talk to Her

Have meaningful conversation with your wife. Be comfortable laughing with your wife. Tell her your frustrations and do not hold back, she is your helper and your biggest intercessor.

5.Defend Her

Marriage can become complicated when a husband does not defend his wife especially to his relatives. Your relatives must never take the liberty of gossiping about your wife in your presence. The Bible says to love your wife in the same manner you love yourself.

Ephesians 5:28

In the same way husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.

It is the role of the husband to defend his wife and stand up for her with his family. Do not allow anyone to sow a seed of division in your marriage.