THE PORTLAND DAILY SUN, Wednesday, December 22, 2010— Page 5
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So, what’s your holiday relationship with relationships? Disclaimer: Writing a piece on the decline of marriage is an unfitting choice for the holiday week — don’t ask why I didn’t save the Santa piece for now instead. On second thought, on Christmas morn, when wives open a smoked hickory sausage kit (the attached receipt confirms 12/24, 6:26 p.m.) or dad is forced to make reindeer hoof marks on the slippery roof at midnight, perhaps this is more appropriate than at first blush. With so many celeb splits garnering top headlines, why is there a doubt that divorce holds an assumed glamour? We watch the scorned lover draped in a black shawl re-emerge months later with new abs, blond highlights, a young sexy mate on their arm — and a hefty settlement to spend in Italy. It is like Extreme Makeover, Love Edition. And who doesn’t love a comeback? Football is one thing. The problem is that marriage has lost its respect. Once gilded as the most wholesome tradition one could undertake, rumor has it, the big M is becoming unnecessary. In a recent Pew Research study done in partnership with Time magazine, it was found four in 10 Americans think marriage is obsolete. Forty-four percent of those between the ages of 18 and 29 saw marriage as passé. These are the ones that will be defining society in a few years and almost half of them see no need to walk down the aisle.
Maggie Knowles ––––– Use Your Outdoor Voice In 1960, 72 percent of all adults in this country were married. Now, that number hovers at a little over 50 percent. And if half of those marriages are doomed. … So, in a world where marriage was once regarded as the most important institution, why the sudden tilt to Happily Never After? The same study finds that the Team “I Don’t” demographic is more likely to have come from a broken home and that certainly affects their view of marriage. Some of them want to wait (and wait) to make sure they don’t follow in their parents’ footsteps, while others are just permanently scared to the single side. Others just enjoy being free and selfish, loving the wading pool filled with available fish that are ready to party. They can’t imagine life any other way. Census data shows that younger people are marrying less often, and when they marry, they’re doing it at an older age. The average age when one first gets married is at its highest point ever; for women, it’s 26.1 years of age, and for men, it’s 28.2. Several factors from advanced schooling to building a career to making sure one finds the most compatible spouse all factor
into this. Women can have babies into their 40’s now, so the pressure to breed young is off and the white dresses are staying on the rack longer. Interestingly, people say that marriage is no longer the defining term in creating a family—86% of respondents say a singleton raising kids is a family. Far fewer say a married couple with no offspring are. (Although if you have pets, that bumps you up a few notches in Family Land.) With a growing segment of the population allowed to raise children but not wed, is a natural progression that marriage would be scrutinized for its (lack of?) importance. Even with the staggering amount of people against gay marriage, 63% of people still agree that same-sex parents are a family. “I actually think we should do away with marriage as a governmental construct,” says Jess F. “It’s discriminatory both towards singles and those who have a non-traditional relationship. Please do keep it as a religious sacrament for those who see it that way.” Brangelina said they won’t get married until everyone is allowed to—and they have six kids. Few would debate that they aren’t a family because they didn’t join Club Wed. Yet, despite anti-marriage inklings, people are still overall romantics. 93% of people still say they marry for love and we all know optimists on their second, third and fourth marriages… though Amy G. is ready to do away with multiple weddings. “If this meant I didn’t have to go to a
gift registry at Pottery Barn for third marriages, then I think it is awesome. You’ve had two marriages, and the only things you ‘need’ are from Williams Sonoma? Seriously?” A lot is to be said for the commitment aspect of being married. It gives that extra layer of glue that gets you through the hard times. When you are just dating, it is so easy to bolt when things don’t go your way. But something does change once you have signed that paper. “There is something wonderful and magical about knowing through thick and thin, crying and sick children, fights and lots of laughter that you are committed to each other,” says Wendy S. “I think it gives a clear message to each other and your children that your union is powerful. I understand many marriages do not last the test of time but I also know many people who still believe in marriage.” “As I got older, I realized what a huge commitment marriage is,” adds Julie F. “Two people should be able to look into each other’s eyes, and know things no one else will ever know, because they stuck together in the darkness, and shared the emergence into the light.” Despite the growing adverse opinion to matrimony, marriage isn’t going anywhere in the near future. For better or worse. (Maggie Knowles is a columnist for The Portland Daily Sun. Her column appears Wednesdays.)
China is an environmental disaster with an eye on our money HARROP from page 4
by China or in cahoots with it, boycotted the ceremony. At the same time, China blocked its citizens’ Internet access to reports on Liu and his prize. Four years ago, the European parliament honored another jailed Chinese dissident Wei Jingsheng. Beijing accused it of committing “violent interference in China’s internal affairs” and warned of harm to European interests. This is the country to which America has put itself in hock, mainly because we don’t have the discipline to raise taxes and/or cut spending — and instead borrow from the Chinese. Other than ruthlessness, China does have one strength that this country lacks: a leadership foursquare behind modern science. While America’s carbon cavemen question the need for green energy — going so far as trying to halt California’s efforts
to promote it — China is full-speed-ahead assembling clean-power equipment (while expropriating the technology from others). Make no mistake. China is an environmental disaster. It continues to build the most primitive coal-fired power plants, and its air is so bad that made-in-China smog drifts to our West Coast. But its dictators see the future, and so have opened the national treasury to industries making solar panels and wind turbines. They’re also building high-speed passenger trains and rail lines. For a planned rail link between Beijing and Shanghai, one test train was clocked at over 300 miles an hour. Long Island’s Suffolk County is putting a solar energy farm at the Brookhaven National Laboratory and erecting solar panels over seven public parking areas. The panels for the parking lots will come from China, as will many at the lab, with the rest also not-made-in-the-USA.
In one small but illustrative deal, the Massachusetts Water Resources Authority is buying a Chinese-built wind turbine to power a wastewater pumping station. Chinese manufacturers now hold nearly half the globe’s $45 billion market for wind turbines. Meanwhile, a significant segment of our so-called conservative leadership slows progress on behalf of polluters — and drugs the American public with tax cuts financed by debt to China. As Beijing frustrates Washington’s program to isolate Iran, Americans load their SUV trunks with Chinese tricycles, shirts and snow domes. Makes you worry about our future. Makes you sad. (To find out more about Froma Harrop, and read features by other Creators Syndicate writers and cartoonists, visit the Creators Syndicate web page at www.creators.com.)
In reality, ordinary families struggle with hunger in America SCHULTZ from page 4
I would do.” “I found a job it’s part time 8-10 hours a wk. min. wage. This food pantry is so helpful, it helps. I decided to volunteer to help.” “I am a single mom of three and on disability. Since I started receiving disability my food stamps were cut in half. This place has been a life saver for me and my boys. I can’t drive because of disability and can’t eat anywhere else. Thank you.” “Just started working minimum wage job can’t make ends meet. Get sick its medicine or food. The
pantry helps because I will be able to save a little every month and hopefully become self-sufficient.” “My unemployment has run out I am 60 years old and no one will hire me in my job field or any other job — rent runs out November and will be on the street in our van.” “Can’t afford our health insurance anymore, will have to cancel in January 2011. Disconnection notices on utilities. Behind on our mortgage. At least get some food from the foodbank. My husband and I are both working. Can’t survive anymore.” “For people living in this zip code, many of us had good careers. But due to illness our things of
that nature we live here. We feel blessed that other communities help with these pantries. We are all important even if we are poor. Thanks for caring.” Somewhere near you, families are struggling with hunger. Please give what you can. (Connie Schultz is a Pulitzer Prize-winning columnist for The Plain Dealer in Cleveland and an essayist for Parade magazine. To find out more about Schultz (cschultz@plaind.com) and read her past columns, please visit the Creators Syndicate Web page at www.creators.com.)