Social Media & Self- Presentation

Fake It Till You Make It

By Jenny Regla

Social Media is becoming an epidemic that is infecting all of us, particularly in how we represent ourselves, judge or get judged by others.

Social media started as a way to include those in your circle with an update, a photo, or a video you wanted to share. It also allowed us to see what our friends and followers were up to. Myspace was one of the first forms of social media but back then it was only on your desktop. There, users were able to customize their pages and choose who they wanted on their page with their top friends showing. It felt more personalized than what we have going on today with Facebook, Instagram, and Snapchat. It didn’t feel quite as superficial because it was just getting started and the process of sharing your personal information was still in its infancy. There wasn’t the same level of judgement when it came to posting because it was kept within your circle of friends. Nowadays, we are friends with or follow so many people, whether we know them or not. This means social sharing, judgment, and comparison are now happening on exponentially different levels. In her article, “The More Miserable You Are, the Happier Your Social Media Posts, and This Twitter Thread Proves It,” Jessica Stilman acknowledges the fact that social media users like to “induce envy” when it comes to their posts. Meaning, we often post what we think others want to see, not the real, vulnerable, or unflattering versions of ourselves. Stilman suggests that because we see our followers “humblebragging” about their lives, we sometimes feel that ours doesn’t measure up to theirs, so we decide to post what we think they want to see. She explains that we know our lives differ greatly from online to our real life. But even though that difference is known, individuals still fall into the “trap” and are convinced that they need to upload flattering versions of their lifestyle, relationships, or appearance. According to the article, there was a tweet shared that asked Twitter users to post a picture they had uploaded on social media that also represented a difficult time in their life. Through that tweet, there was an outpouring of responses from people who posted photos with stories behind them. There was a photo from a user who had done the color run, where she was smiling in the photo but admitted she had been suicidal during that time. It can be impactful to read these posts from users and realize that while everyone is going through something, most are not posting about it. Instead, some may post the unreal parts of themselves and somewhat “pretend” that everything is great. A beauty influencer that goes by Desi Perkins on Instagram recently opened up about the difficulties of trying to conceive. In one of her recent videos, she decided to not edit out the part where she has a meltdown because of all the hormones she’s been intaking due to in vitro fertilization (IVF). The responses that she got back from that were all positive, and people appreciated the fact that she didn’t edit out that part. So maybe there can be more authentic sharing but, generally speaking, social media users more often self-edit, self-censor, and self-promote from what they choose to show, the angles they use in their photos, or even through their use of filters.

Photos by Catalina Garcia

Perhaps that is why social media filters get some negative and positive backlash when it comes to posting. People are quick to judge someone when they have posted a photo on Instagram using a filter, but at the same time filters are used the majority of the time to make a photo look more attractive, lighter, colorful, or even to remove blemishes. Whether that is a selfie of yourself or what you are currently eating.

Even beauty infuencers get negative comments about the smallest things so why wouldn’t others try to post the best version of themselves? Why wouldn’t they post the most exciting places they’ve visited, the most expensive shoes they own, or how great their relationship is, even when others know it’s not a true representation of reality? Elena, an influencer also known as “Gentlelights” on Instagram, says she uses the platform as “an outlet to show the things I love...it can be anything from home decor, a recipe, skincare, outfit inspo, the list goes on.” While her daily posts might include promoting a jewelry brand such as Wanderelle, or a shoe brand like Dolce Vita, she also talked about the negative side of social media and how some users on Instagram are quick to judge someone, even though they “definitely shouldn’t.” She states how there is “a lot of comparing, which is so unhealthy.” She doesn’t personally see Instagram as a place where she needs to portray a certain lifestyle since she already has a presence there, but she agrees that people are still quick to judge her sometimes by what she posts. Has social media made us a society more accustomed and open to judging others, as well as only posting the good parts of our lives? There is a saying, “If you didn’t post it, then it never happened.” This sentiment has led social media users to frequently post the best aspects of their lives, from the best angle, using the best filters, to show themselves in the best possible light. This raises concerns that social media versions of our relationships, ourselves, and what we share have become more real than our actual offline lives. There will always be criticism about whether or not people are genuine through their social media. As users, each of us will have to be our own judges of that, but equally important to remember is that seeing should not always be the same thing as believing.