Time and permeability: meeting others on common ground

In my last column, I talked about complexity, the second in my ve-part series on our relationship with time, and how we respond to it.

is month let’s look at what happens when you move from complexity into permeability. When you become permeable, you’re heavily in uenced by the ideas of others, the world around you, and demands being made on you. You’re so saturated with what’s going on outside yourself you lose your sense of inner balance, become detached from your core, and your sense of wellbeing. You can feel isolated and likely have trouble discerning what’s working and not working in your life, which can lend to your feeling of a lack of con dence.

When it comes to decision-making, con dence isn’t something you acquire or make yourself do. It’s the result of knowing your self, having grace with limiting factors and setting strong boundaries.

Having too many projects, attending to everyone else’s needs, reading every social media meme about how to be the best, can contribute to your feelings confusion and defeat.

Here are a few ways I work with my clients so they are able to redirect their feelings of overwhelm:

Re-name confusion and call it “my options.” Confusion keeps you stuck and helpless, while having options just means there is more than one way to see your situation.

Relax and let yourself see the circumstances are unclear, not YOU.

Notice where and when your

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Unlearn It

sense of self returns as you reframe confusion and turn it into understanding your options.

Christine Kahane

Next, bring on your decision-making power by asking yourself some questions to help you discern what is most important to you now:

Which options serve your needs now and what can be moved to the mid-and long term?

What results are you seeking?

What will you achieve if you can bundle your options?

Which options are you ready to release for good?

What boundaries will you set in order to implement them?

Answering even some of these questions will begin to set you free from the information tsunami coming toward you.

Something marvelous will start to happen — you will feel more grounded and able to tackle what’s in front of you. Your sense of self will return — you’ll feel more sure of your direction. Now, you’re inhabiting your con dence.

Coach, and owner of KAHANE COACHING (www.kahanecoaching. com), located at 30792 Southview Drive/Suite 206 in Evergreen, CO. For more information about coaching, or to write-in a question for UNlearn it! send your inquiries to christine@ kahanecoaching.com.

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October 17, 1951 - January 18, 2023

Robert (Bob) Tamburlin formerly of Brockport, PA, passed away peacefully Wednesday January 18, 2023, surrounded by his family in Colorado. He was born October 17, 1951 to Leo and Lorraine (Grecco) Tamburlin, who preceded him in death.

After he graduated from Ridgway High School in 1969 he attended Penn State University and graduated from Butler Community College. Bob was a true country and mountain man, having lived in Colorado since 1973. He built his log home in 1977 and never wanted to live anywhere else. Bob owned his own concrete company for many years. After closing his company, he retired to work on a ranch in Pine, CO. Bob was an avid hunter in Colorado and returned most years to PA. for hunting season, enjoying family and friends at the Tamburlin Camp.

Bob is survived by his wife Louan Watson, his children Kimberly (Je ) Parrett, Sheena Tamburlin, Joey (Savannah) Tamburlin; grandchildren Ashleigh, Spencer, Lucas, Haddie, Brooke; brother Gary (LouAnn)Tamburlin, nephew Je (Jennifer)Tamburlin, nieces Gina Tamburlin, and Alicia (Matt)Sheeley; also many cousins and close friends.

A memorial celebration will be held in the late spring 2023 at the family home and meadow. Memorial donations can be sent in Bob’s name to Rocky Mountain Elk Foundation, Missoula MT. www.RockyMountainElkFoundation.org.