Baltimore City Paper, Vol. 33, No. 5

Page 1

THE AGE OF SNARK / PAGE 27

BALTIMORE’S FREE ALTERNATIVE WEEKLY ■ VOL. 33 NO. 5, FEB. 4-FEB. 11, 2009 ■ WWW.CITYPAPER.COM

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BALTIMORE’S FREE ALTERNATIVE WEEKLY EDITOR: Lee Gardner ART DIRECTOR: Joe MacLeod MANAGING EDITOR: Erin Sullivan ARTS EDITOR: Bret McCabe MUSIC EDITOR: Michael Byrne ONLINE EDITOR: Tim Hill SPECIAL PROJECTS EDITOR: Anna Ditkoff SENIOR STAFF WRITER: Van Smith STAFF WRITERS: Jeffrey Anderson, Edward Ericson Jr., Chris Landers CONTRIBUTING WRITERS: John Barry, Tom Chalkley, Charles Cohen, Raymond Cummings, Violet Glaze, Michelle Gienow, Cole Haddon, Geoffrey Himes, Henry Hong, Martin L. Johnson, Laura Laing, Deborah McLeod, Brian Morton, Kate Noonan, Al Shipley, Vincent Williams, Mary K. Zajac CONTRIBUTING PHOTOGRAPHERS AND ILLUSTRATORS: Okan Arabacioglu, Emily C-D, Tom Chalkley, Ben Cricchi, Jennifer Daniel, John Ellsberry, Alex Fine, Emily Flake, Michelle Gienow, Mel Guapo, Sam Holden, Frank Klein, Daniel Krall, Hawk Krall, Uli Loskot, Christopher Myers, Michael Northrup, RaRah, Paige Shuttleworth, Deanna Staffo, Smell of Steve Inc., Jefferson Jackson Steele, M. Wartella, Autumn Whitehurst BALTIMORE WEEKLY EDITOR: Wendy Ward COPY EDITOR: Joseph Tropea ASSISTANT TO THE ART DIRECTOR: Wynter Towns INTERNS: Zachary Evans, Fawn Gwynallen, Kim Irwin, Randi Leyshon, Kathryn Mastandrea, Awis Mranani, Chidinma Okparanta PRODUCTION DIRECTOR: Athena Towery (x211) SENIOR GRAPHIC DESIGNER: Matt Walter CLASSIFIED PRODUCTION SUPERVISOR: Donald Ely GRAPHIC DESIGNERS: Frank Hamilton, Daria Johnson ADVERTISING DIRECTOR: Jennifer Marsh (x221) SENIOR ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES: Andy Grimshaw (x222), Chris Ziolkowski (x219) ACCOUNT EXECUTIVES: Valerie Gatzke (x253), Nina Land (x220), Annie Smikins (x214), Dylan Smith (x226) CLASSIFIED MANAGER: Leslie Grim (x246) REAL ESTATE ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE: Ashira Jensen (x248) AUTOMOTIVE ACCOUNT EXECUTIVE: Bettina Wachter (x244) CLASSIFIED DISPLAY REPRESENTATIVES: Kathryn Hudson (x249), Patrick Martin (x245), Joy Sushinsky (x247) CLASSIFIED LINE SUPERVISOR: Nicole Urbain (x212) CLASSIFIED LINE REPRESENTATIVES: Gemma Gould (x213), Emily Robinson (x209) ADVERTISING ASSISTANT: Linda Bernstein (x216) CLASSIFIED SALES ASSISTANT: Rob Farley (x208) EVENTS/MARKETING INFORMATION: x252 CIRCULATION DIRECTOR: Christine Grabowski CIRCULATION MAINTENANCE: Mike Grabowski DISTRIBUTION: Keith Bondurant, Kelly Carr, Evan Ebb, Lloyd Farrow, Harold Goldman, Mike Grabowski, Jean LeBlanc, Abe Mamot, Bonnie Mullens, Miroslav Muzyka, Michael Nelson, Marek Obrebski, Hector Rivera, Mark Scudder, Marek Seder, George Svezzese, James Tighe BUSINESS MANAGER: Nicole Seabrease RECEPTIONIST: Michelle Bollino NATIONAL ADVERTISING: The Ruxton Group, (888) 278-9866 GROUP PUBLISHER: Don Farley (x229) GENERAL SALES MANAGER: Jennifer Marsh (x221) PUBLISHER’S ASSISTANT: Susan Slike (x224) Volume 33, Number 5 February 4, 2009. City Paper is published every week by Times-Shamrock communications.Letters and calendar submissions are welcomed; please see these sections for details. Unsolicited editorial submissions will not be returned. Subscriptions available for $150 per year, 1st class. No refunds. ©2009 C.E.G.W./Times-Shamrock. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without the written permission of the editor. 812 Park Avenue, Baltimore, MD 21201 (410) 523-2300; advertising fax: (410) 523-2222; editorial fax: (410) 523-0138; Baltimore Weekly fax: (410) 523-8437. Get It Online: www.citypaper.com

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CONTENTS

VOL. 33 NO. 5, FEBRUARY 4-FEBRUARY 11, 2009

IN THE PAPER FEATURE/12 COLUMNS & DEPARTMENTS THE MAIL/5 MR. WRONG/7 MOBTOWN BEAT/9 MURDER INK/9 WHOSE RESPONIBLE?/51 SAVAGE LOVE/61 FREE WILL ASTROLOGY/73 PUZZLE PAGE/74 ARTS & ENTERTAINMENT OPENING ACT/19 FILM/21 MUSIC/24 BOOKS/27 ART/28 STAGE/29 EAT ME/30 EATS AND DRINKS/32 BALTIMORE WEEKLY HIGHLIGHTS/36 THE SHORT LIST/41

COMICS THIS MODERN WORLD/5 DIRT FARM/62 THE PAIN—WHEN WILL IT END?/62 MAAKIES/62 LULU EIGHTBALL/73 IMPORTANT COMICS/79 ON THE COVER: PHOTOGRAPHS BY FRANK HAMILTON ON THE WEB SITE ❑ MURDER INK UPDATES ❑ BLOG ROLL: ❑ THE NEWS HOLE ❑ NOISE ❑ FEED BAG ❑ ULIBLOG ❑ ARTS AND MINDS ❑ X-CONTENT ❑ CPTV

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THE MAIL

Tat Touché

We Hope You Like Our New Direction Consider this what I hope is one of many complaints about the removal of The Straight Dope. I considered the feature’s weekly inclusion in City Paper one of the reasons I moved from Outer Hinterlands to Sophisticated Big City 17 years ago. Bring it back. Please. ALEXANDER D. MITCHELL IV BALTIMORE

Let me see if I understand the new improvements to City Paper. I lose two thirds of my favorite column, Political Animal. I lose one sixth of my second favorite column, Mr. Wrong. But I guess I shouldn’t worry two much about it, because the print is so eyestrainingly small that I kinda can’t read them anyway. Whose responsible? JOHN BONN TOWSON

As a loyal reader of City Paper, I would like to thank you for putting the announcement of your new dimensions on the front page. I was initially alarmed at the idea that I might be growing larger. KURT TESNAU BALTIMORE

Legalize it, Please? Great article ("Shadow Players,” Feature, Jan. 28). If local drug stores could sell heroin and coke legally and cheap, imagine how different the city could be. Dope fiends wouldn’t need to steal, corner boys would have to work, and violent crime drops 80 percent . . . Baltimore is livable. How can something that makes so much sense seem so foreign and ridiculous to the powers that be? CHRIS KAISER NASSAU BAY, TEXAS

THIS MODERN WORLD

As a long-time resident of Mount Vernon, a lightly tattooed person, and a non-Eurocentric feminist, I have had many occasions to discuss neighborhood-planning issues with Jim Hall (“Feeling Blue,” Feature, Jan. 21). He was—and is—a terrific person, passionate about this city, its buildings, and people. Frankly, I was quite astonished when I first read the article about him. But, after some thought, I look at it this way: Baltimore is full of colorful characters. Jim’s just taking it to the next level.

Address letters to THE MAIL, City Paper, 812 Park Ave., Baltimore, MD 21201; fax: (410) 523-0138; e-mail: letters@citypaper. com. Only letters that address material published in or policies of CP, are no more than 500 words long, and include the writer’s name, address, and daytime phone number will be considered for publication. Letters may be edited for length and clarity.

SUE GLICKSTEIN BALTIMORE

Funny Business I would like to take this opportunity to thank you because I have read and enjoyed the journalism of the City Paper ever since I moved here in 1987. But what really gives me joy is reading the comics section. I remember when you had quite a few of them on a single page; not quite in the volume of a daily, but the ones you had were insightful, ironic and just plain witty. Your comics contest is a good idea, but the winning entries are not. I do not want to focus on negative; rather, I want to thank you for continuing to run Tom Tomorrow’s This Modern World. It is one of the best of the thoughtful pieces out there, and fits well within the tone of City Paper. May I also recommend you also renew your contract with Derf and Red Meat? They are also fun additions to the paper, and provide a relief from the comictragedy we call politics in Charm City. GREG GAGNON BALTIMORE

No Time for It Ms. Butler, as a Eurocentric Darwinian Leftist, I am compelled to let you in on a little secret that has served the forces of white supremacy and white privilege well during our reign in America. BY TOM TOMORROW

It is our policy that any prominent white man or woman who embarrasses us with acts of brazen criminality, stupidity, or immorality is taken and thrown under the bus (“Dixon a Victim,” The Mail, Jan. 28). Now and again, some escape punishment. Occasionally, we allow some offenders back into our ranks. More often than not, when an elite white man does something stupid, he goes under the wheels of the bus. In this way, our precious time, money, and effort are not dissipated on defending them, but are instead invested in maintaining our iron grip on power. Ms. Butler, there are only so many AfricanAmericans, with only so much money and so much available time. If you truly believe that Sheila Dixon is innocent and more importantly have concrete evidence that the charges against her are motivated by “the ultimate meanness of racism, and gender institutional racism” and being propagated by a wide ranging conspiracy plotting “to take a ‘bitch’ down from the high tower of administrative government” then by all means go out and rally community support behind her. If my belief is correct and you do not have any evidence (real, documentary evidence) then I advise the African-American community of Baltimore to simply ignore you because every dollar your actions direct toward Dixon’s legal defense fund (when and if she establishes one) is a dollar that could have been spent on funding Baltimore City schools or other projects and institutions that serve the African-American and Baltimore City communities, and every minute spent defending Dixon is a minute wasted that could have been used to mentor a wayward child, lobby for additional funding for the Algebra Project, or report criminal activities. MATTHEW HOOD BALTIMORE

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FEATURE: “Shadow Players” “This is one of the hundreds of reasons I left Balto in 2000 for the far safer confines of Appalachian VA. It is a lot quieter here too. I got tired of waking up at 2 am or later to the sound of gunfire between the Nigerians and the Jamaicans across Harford Rd. Please dig deeper into these things. Perhaps one day someone up there will grow a pair and start mopping up these people. Then Baltimore will be a safe place to visit again.” —“KANGHI416,” 1/28/2009, 12:30:41 A.M. ■

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MR. WRONG

BY J O E M AC L E O D

NOW IS THE WINTER OF MY DISCONTENT OK, SO I WAS ALL OPTIMISTIC about the Year of Our Lord Two Thousand and Niner, but that was like three weeks ago, back when I had a newspaper column that ran every other week, but now I have a newspaper column that runs every three weeks, and sure, I want to complain about it—I kinda am right now—but it’s not as easy as bitching about the difference between having a weekly column—like some columns in this paper used to be, in this weekly Alternative Weekly—and an every-third-week column, which mathematically I think would be like 33.3 % less column, I guess? Or maybe 66.6 % less than if it was a weekly column? Yeah, there’s

that got sabotaged or something and they had a few seconds of a porno on instead of Super Bowl, but here in Baltimore, USA, they, the TV channel, whose name I will not reveal—however I will tell you their initials are Number 11—ran the goddamn Lottery drawing on this stupid dual-screen thing during the Halftime Festivities. Nice call Number 11, it was the most energetic and exciting part of National Treasure and Presidential Supporter Bruce Springsteen’s performance and you screwed it up by showing someone talking and pulling those bingo-ball numbers. Why didn’t you just put ‘em up on the screen like you did with the three and four-digit gambling? And hey, speaking of the president, how smart is that guy? He got some free air time with Matt Lauer on the pre-game, and he even picked the winning team, although he didn’t mention if that was with or without the point-spread, but I will give him a Presidential Mulligan on that shit. Nice one, Mr. President, now let’s get the

LET’S PUSH GROUNDHOG CLOSER TO SUPER BOWL SO WE CAN HEAL AS A NATION. some sorta Mathematical equation in here some- fucking economy going, umkay? So after Faith Hill (I think) sang “America the place, like, if x = a Year’s Worth of Every-OtherWeek Columns, then a year’s worth of Now My Beautiful” and then proceeded to get her ass Column Only Runs Every Third Week = Bullshit. handed to her by Jennifer Hudson, who sang the So anyway, I can’t even find a good way to com- fucking National Anthem, there was also some good football action this Super Bowl, and I had a plain about this shit, and it’s cold out, and the fucking Groundhog saw his shadow because it serious Couch Hangover the next day, so I wish the New Administration could figure out a way was sunny. Fucking Groundhog. to have Groundhog Day come the day after Super Now look, I’m a big fan of the Groundhog Bowl and then give us all the day off without havDay Holiday, and I think it should be an Official Holiday, even, with a day off and stuff like that, ing to lie to The Boss about being sick, although especially since it is usually right on the heels of I guess it is different to call in sick with a cold in Super Bowl, and hey, didja see any Super Bowl? your nose as opposed to still being drunk from Even some commercials? I liked the one where Super Bowl, but still, let’s see what We The People can do about my Groundhog Initiative, pushing the lady had a pet rhinoceros and it ran out of her house without opening the door. That was Groundhog closer to Super Bowl so we can heal as a Nation, and I’m not all like superstitious or pretty funny, although I can’t remember what it was a commercial for, while I totally remember whatever about the Groundhog Day, man, bethe Doritos one with the guy who had the crystal cause there is a sound Scientific Principle upon which Groundhog Weather Theory is based, ball and he broke open the snack machine, and and it is so simple even I can understand it, to that commercial was funny up to a point, but wit: If it be sunny out-of-doors, Groundhog will then ended up with some random violence on somebody’s groin, which is always a disappoint- see yon Shadow, and six more weeks of Winter there will be. Conversely, if it is an overcast day, ment, even on the America’s Funniest Home Videos there will be no cast Shadow for TV program, you know? Also, what’s Ye Groundhogge to discern, and up with having a commercial showGOT AN OPINION that means it’s only six more weeks ing how to steal Doritos?? Didn’t the ABOUT MR. WRONG? until Spring, get it? See, I’m not so Frito-Lay company run that concept LEAVE A COMMENT AT strong on the Math, but I am totally into the ground with their beloved a Man of Science! The only really and ethnically disparaging “Frito CITYPAPER.COM. good action on Groundhog Day is Bandito” character a kabillion years if it is Partly Cloudy, because then ago? Yeah. I also enjoyed the commercial where Alec (Alex? What the hell is his it’s basically a coin toss, eh? Anyway, there are people who make big bucks name on the 30 Rock?) Baldwin shows how Teevee does not rot your brain and then totally stabs interpreting the perceptions of the Groundhog. OK, maybe it’s a volunteer effort, I dunno, I’m just Teevee in the back by commanding you to watch saying it’s all about your perceptions, and now it on the Internet! That was pretty shocking, and I am generally against the Internet, but if they keep I got Less Columns to perceive them in. Write your fucking Congressman. ■ putting all kinds of delicious Television on it, I’m gonna have to figure something out, kna’mean? I’ll tell you some other shit about Super Bowl, WWW.SPLICETODAY.COM, MRWRONG.TUMBLR.COM, man, I heard there was some local cable company WRONGCOLUMN@GMAIL.COM

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MOBTOWN BEAT BY AN NA DITKOFF

MURDERS THIS WEEK: 6 MURDERS THIS YEAR: 23 MONDAY, JAN. 26

TUESDAY, JAN. 27 10:22 P. M . Someone was at Jasmine Harris’ door in the 3000 block of Windsor Avenue in Walbrook. When the 23-yearold African-American woman opened the door she was shot under the chin at close range. Police found her dead on her front porch. It was snowing that night, and an officer followed tracks in the snow to Kenneth Warren, a 24-year-old AfricanAmerican man. Warren matched the description of the shooter given to police and was arrested. According to charging documents, Harris had been having problem with members of the Black Guerilla Family, for whom she had at some point allegedly smuggled drugs. A few weeks before she was murdered she was severely beaten by gang members. Harris is the second woman murdered in the first month of 2009.

CHASING AMY

FINAL EXAMINER Examiner reporters talk about the paper’s imminent closure “IT WAS A COMPLETE shock,” Luke Broadwater says when asked how he felt about the news that the Baltimore Examiner will publish its last issue Feb. 15. “You know, I guess you could read the writing on the wall with the bad economy. Everybody is cutting back and jobs are being lost and so forth.” Broadwater, a repor ter who joined the paper just a month after its April 2006 startup in Baltimore, is now one of about 90 Examiner employees who will likely be out of work in a couple of weeks.

“WHEN WE FIRST CAME OUT, PEOPLE THOUGHT WE WOULD BE THIS SHOPPER THING. BUT IT TURNED OUT AFTER A YEAR OR SO WE WERE, I THINK, A GOOD NEWSPAPER.”

At 10 A.M. on Jan. 29 at a fullstaff meeting, Clarity Media Group CEO Ryan McKibben WEDNESDAY, JAN. 28 told Examiner employees 10:59 P. M . Twenty-four hours later, that Clarity, the division of Dewayne Lawrence, a 17-year- old Anschutz Entertainment African-American male, was found shot Group that operates the in the head in the 5900 block of Moravia Examiner newspapers in Road near the Cedonia Inn. Lawrence Washington, D.C., Baltimore, was sitting in the front passenger seat and San Francisco, decided it of a Volvo. He was dead. The next day, a was time to pull the plug on 28-year-old African-American man named the Baltimore publication. Eric Evans was arrested and charged A c c ord i ng to a me mo with Lawrence’s murder. According to from McKibben, which was ABC2 news, two of Lawrence’s brothers widely distributed online have also been murdered. Lawrence is within a short time of the 10 the sixth juvenile murdered this year. A.M. meeting, Clarity Media made the “very difficult deTHURSDAY, JAN. 29 cision” to shutter the paper 12:30 P. M . A woman flagged down a af ter “several months of police officer and directed him to a gavery active, but unrage behind the 900 block of successful efforts Poplar Grove Street in West WANT THE LATEST to find a buyer for Baltimore. James McKoy, a ON HOMICIDE the newspaper.” 46-year-old African-American ARRESTS AND McKibben’s memo man, had been shot in the head CONVICTIONS? indicates that the and was dead. READ THE MURDER compa ny tr ied INK UPDATES AT to form a “synerFRIDAY, JAN. 30 CITYPAPER.COM/ g i s t i c ” r e v e nu e MURDERINK.ASP 11:12 A.M. Theodore Moore, a system between 44-year-old African-American the Baltimore and man, died a week after he was Washington papers, linking shot. On Jan. 23, at 3:04 P.M., Moore the two properties’ marketwas standing in the middle of the 2000 ing and advertising efforts, CONTINUED ON PAGE 11

THE NOSE

FRANK KLEIN

4:02 A.M. Stephen Mauk, a 47-year-old Caucasian cab driver from Germantown, was found dead in his cab. Police found him parked in the 200 block of North Bond Street, a block south of Johns Hopkins Hospital. He was sitting in the front seat, shot in the head. Mauk is the second Caucasian man murdered this year.

THE EXAMINER OFFICES IN DOWNTOWN BALTIMORE WILL GO DARK IN JUST A COUPLE OF WEEKS.

but the shrinking U.S. economy made it impossible “to maintain two major daily newspapers within a 50mile distance and do justice to both publications.” As a result, Clarity decided to put The Examiner up for sale, but McKibben says the dynamics of the recession kept buyers away. Nobody within the Baltimore Examiner newsroom knew the paper was up for sale. “Reporters aren’t really privy to the business side, and they didn’t tell us anything,” says Broadwater, who was home sick during the Jan. 29 meeting and learned about the news in a phone call from his editor. “So it was a complete surprise.” Reporter Stephen Janis, a former City Paper freelancer who took a job with The Examiner when it first opened in Baltimore, says he was also shocked to hear the news. “I can say honestly that none of us had any sense that this was coming,” he says. “I

think maybe our publisher said he had found out about it last night in his remarks, but I think it surprised the entire company.” It was a surprise to many in the media community as well. No one City Paper has contacted had heard that the paper was on the market. Asked if he had seen any indication that the Examiner might be going out of business, City Paper publisher Don Farley says no. “I think they did a really good job of being quiet about this,” he says. Although the a n nou ncement seemed abrupt, Farley says the timing was probably an attempt to close up shop before the end of the company’s first financial quarter. “I think they saw the trend of how the first quarter was going and decided to stop.” In July 2008, the paper reduced its home delivery to two days per week, eliminated its Saturday edition, and came out with a new Sunday edition; according to Janis, it has also been re-

ducing the size of its staff through attrition. “When people were leaving we weren’t filling positions, since about last summer,” he says. “When someone would leave they wouldn’t rehire. I think, to give you my best estimate, we’d gone from 16 general-assignment reporters to nine.” The irony of the situation is that the paper, on the verge of closure, is probably at its strongest editorially. When the paper first hit the Baltimore streets, Broadwater says, the emphasis was on quantity over quality. But as The Examiner and its staff matured, so did its content. “You know, I think when we first came out people thought we would be this s or t o f s hopp e r t h i ng ,” Broadwater says. “But it turned out after a year or so we were, I think, a good newspaper.” One sign of that, Janis says, is that in 2008 the paper won f ive M DDC (Maryland-DelawareDistrict of Columbia) Press Association Awa rds. Up against other major dailies, including The Washington Post and The Baltimore Sun, CONTINUED ON PAGE 11

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THE NOSE thought it had sniffed out a story a couple of weekends ago, landing an interview with Amy Fisher at her exotic dance debut at Scores here in Charm City. We’ve all done things we regret, so we hoped the Long Island Lolita might be able to impart a lesson or two in taking lemons and making lemonade. Or something. On the day we were scheduled to meet, we called Lou, her manager, husband and sometime costar, to see where he wanted to get together. Seems he’d already set up an exclusive with In Touch Weekly, and neither he nor Ms. Fisher were allowed to talk to anyone else. “It’s like a gag order,” Lou explained. “They paid us a lot of money—we’d be crazy not to take it.” How much money, we wondered. “What are you, nuts?” Lou asked. “I’m not telling you that.” Whatever the amount, The Nose’s interview budget probably couldn’t match it. We had a couple of bucks, though, so we headed down to Scores for the midnight show. While we waited for Amy, we struck up a conversation with one of the regular dancers, and asked how Amy had done the night before. Not well, apparently. “She didn’t know what she was doing up there,” our new friend told us. “Tonight was better, though—she didn’t fall.” When Amy made her entrance, she wore a rhinestone pants-andtop ensemble, but not for very long. She didn’t fall. She made a few turns around the stage, to the strains of “Night Fever” by the Bee Gees. A young man with glasses and an Afro shouted “Hey Amy!” and lobbed a fistful of ones at her, which an assistant picked up as she made her exit. The MC announced that she would be signing autographs by the side stage and the Nose got in line. At the head of the line we faced a large, silver-haired gentleman. We asked the price of an autograph, and the hint of Long Island in the answer was instantly recognizable. “Pictures are $15,” Lou answered, “T-shirts are $25.” The Nose’s interview budget sadly exhausted, we made our excuses and left.

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EXAMI N ER

CONTI NUED

it took honors for its investigative series on the city’s homicide rate, an investigative story on unsolved murders in Baltimore, an editorial on the city school system, and for its sports section. Messages lef t at the Examiner of f ice seeking comment from either editor Frank Keegan or publisher MU RDER I N K

Michael Beatty were not returned as of this writing. Neither was a call to Clarity spokesman Jim Monaghan. Broadwater says he’s not sure what will happen after Feb. 15—he says he’s not sure if there will be opportunities for any staffers to find work at the Washington Examiner, though he says he’s not counting on it. Janis

says he’s planning to remain in journalism in some form, despite the rather dismal media climate. “I can say this much at this point: I’m not done,” he says. “I’m not finished because being a reporter is being a reporter and that’s a job that can continue even in different forms.” E R I N S U L L I VA N

CONTI NUED

SUNDAY, FEB. 1 6:20 A .M. Police were called to the Allied Waste Services facility in the 200 block of W. Dickman Street in South Baltimore near the Port Covington Wal-Mart. Kendrick Daney, a 38-year-old African-American man, was lying by the front entrance of the building, stabbed to death. According to police, Daney and co-worker Franklin Harrell, a 51-year-old AfricanAmerican man, got into a dispute that ended with Daney dead on the floor. Harrell turned himself in that day and was arrested for Daney’s murder. Seven of this year’s homicides have been closed by arrest.

H E R E’S A Q U I C K illustration of how t h e 31 1 s y s t e m sees Baltimore. The maps above repres en t B al tim o r e’s “Community Statistical Areas”— basically, groups of neighborhoods the city uses for planning purposes. One is normal-sized (top), the other is a cartogram (bottom), where the areas are larger or smaller depending on how many 311 calls for service came from that area in 2008. Standard Disclaimer: What’s The 311 is based on data from the Mayor’s Office of Information Technology. (This time it’s all the calls from 2008.) It has been folded, spindled, and mutilated along the way, and no attempt has been made to verify the information reported by the callers. I tried doing it by neighborhood, but it got too hard to read. Take my word for it, though: Canton and Belair-Edison were huge. Just huge.

COUNCILMANIA

KEEPING TABS ON THE CITY COUNCIL’S ACTIVITIES SO YOU DON’T HAVE TO B Y E DWA R D E R I C S O N J R .

ON THE CITY COUNCIL’S AGENDA FOR JAN. 26

block of Edmondson Avenue when an African-American man in a black hooded sweatshirt shot Moore several times. Moore collapsed and the gunman got into a car, which drove away. Moore was conscious when he was taken to an area hospital, but died seven days later. Cheryl Richards, a 26-year-old Caucasian woman, who police believe was driving the car, was arrested on Jan. 26.

WHAT’S THE

FORMERLY CHOW BABY!

?

AN OCCASIONAL LOOK AT WHAT PEOPLE IN THE CITY ARE COMPLAINING ABOUT BY CH RIS LAN DERS

BILL 09-0271 Tobacco Products— Unpackaged Cigarettes or Cigars. This bill would add cheap little cigars to the existing prohibition on selling cigarettes one at a time. The idea is to keep kids from buying these by making them more expensive. THE READ: Little cigars, often fruit-flavored and sold in smaller packs, are taxed at a lower rate than cigarettes. At least 40 states are trying to close the loophole that allows the big tobacco companies to sell products such as Black and Milds, Winchesters, and Swisher Sweets more cheaply than cigarettes. This is part of that effort. But in the city, the existing law against single-cigarette sales (it’s a misdemeanor carrying up to a $1,000 fine) is honored mostly in the breach. So-called “loose ones” are hawked all over Baltimore on street corners and in tiny, usually unregistered, stores. Despite the bill’s characterization by Councilman Robert Curran (3rd District) as “a great effort to increase the public health of the citizens of Baltimore,” the new prohibition can be expected to drive the little-cigar market more firmly into these precincts. BILL 09-0273 Loading Zones—Fee for Maintaining. Would implement a fee to downtown businesses that have loading zones. THE READ: Councilwoman Belinda Conaway (7th District) apparently wants more parking downtown, and sees the loading zones outside certain businesses as impinging on this. “We want to be fair,” Conaway says. She doesn’t want to overtax city businesses, but (as she told the council during the meeting) a nearby drug store has three potential parking spaces in front taken up by a loading zone. BILL 09-0274 Unsafe Structures—Enforcement by Citation. Would fine owners of “unsafe structures” $1,000. THE READ: “We know we’re plagued with vacant structures,” says Conaway, adding that, currently, the city can mandate that a property owner stabilize an unsafe building but can do very little else. According to the building code, buildings must be safe for human habitation and, if not, boarded and returned to safe condition within 30 days. There is no fine specified in that part of the code, but the building official can correct the condition and charge the owner by placing a lien on the property. The building official can also order demolition—at the owner’s expense—of any unsafe structure. The problem has been that, in practice, this is often not done until after it collapses. The city seldom recoups its costs on these structures.

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LETTER MEN

The Globe Poster Company would like your attention for a moment BY CHRIS L ANDERS P H O T O G R A P H S B Y F R A N K H A M I LT O N BOB CICERO HAS A STORY HE LIKES TO TELL about advertising. A few years ago, he was driving down the street when his son noticed a sign-holding man bobbing and weaving by the side of the road. The younger Cicero thought it looked ridiculous, and pointed it out to his father. “He says, ‘Look over there Globe currently takes up thousands and thousands on the corner—there’s a guy every inch of a cinder-block of blocks of type, in different from Little Caesar, it’s kind warehouse building a few fonts and sizes, in metal, of weird, he’s going back and blocks off the commercial wood, rubber, and linoforth,’” Cicero remembers. strip of Eastern Avenue in leum—some never touched He asked his son, “What did Highlandtown. It’s still very by printer’s ink. it say?” much a going concern, from “We even have a set of “It said $5 PIZZA.” the front counter where Hebrew type,” Frank says. “That’s all he wanted,” Cicero told him. “It caught your eye. It doesn’t matter how outlandish it is, but it caught your eye. . . . Now if you’re hungry, you know there’s a $5 pizza. That’s all it did. Nothing else.” That idea has been the focus at Globe Poster Printing, a nearly 80-year-old company that the Cicero family has run for the past 35 years. They have become specialists in grabbing your attention, just for the time it takes to read a poster. Once you’ve read it, their work is done. Times are tough for a poster company that has been changing with the times and trends since the BOB AND FRANK CICERO AT Great Depression, through GLOBE POSTER COMPANY. circuses and vaudeville and R&B tours, all the way to Frank and Bob rush to an- “We’re just not sure it’s a hip-hop, and the Ciceros are swer the phone to the cav- complete set—none of us beginning to look to their ernous and unheated back speaks Hebrew.” past to preserve Globe for room, where employees feed Even the hulking Miehle the future. Last corrugated plastic letter presses, which haven’t year, they started VIEW A SLIDESHOW blanks into the been used in decades, sit marketing repro- OF GLOBE POSTERS rollers of a huge piled with posters in the ductions of some PHOTOGRAPHED BY screen-printing back. If the Ciceros get their of their most poppress. But along- wish, someday the presses FRANK HAMILTON ular work, such as side the current will roll again. AT CITYPAPER.COM/ posters from the operation, in drawgreat R&B shows GO/GLOBEPOSTERS ers and cabinets FRANK, 64, is the oldest of of the 1950s and and sometimes in the Cicero brothers still ac’60s, trying to turn a profit piles, they have preserved tive at Globe, and the most on posters from the com- the tools of their trade going talkative. Where Bob is thin pany’s golden era. back to Globe’s beginning: and speaks softly and even12 | city paper

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

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ly, Frank is a little bulkier, and his conversation flies from subject to subject as different objects or posters catch his eye in the room. Frank occasionally illustrates a point by grabbing a pen and paper to draw it out. He’s come from the doctor’s office this November morning, and his back is giving him trouble, but that doesn’t stop him from leading a tour—pulling heavy steel printing frames from the glorious clutter that fills the warehouse to show them off to a visitor when Bob doesn’t get there in time to stop him and do it himself. Bob, 61, is a little more reticent at first, but opens up quickly when he talks about Globe. Get the two together and it’s a vaudeville act. Coaxed back to a chair at his desk in the Globe office, Frank is happy to talk about Globe’s past, present, and future. It’s a business his father devoted most of his life to—Joe Sr. started at Globe in 1934, moving up through the ranks until he was able to buy it in 1974. In his hospital room, before he died last year, Joe Cicero Sr. was surrounded by posters, and when Frank, Bob, or Joe Jr. (who retired a few years ago) stopped by, that was all their dad wanted to talk about. Frank Cicero’s first days at the Globe Poster Company, back in 1961, weren’t exactly glamorous, but he laughs when he talks about his start in what would


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LETTER MEN later become the family business. “I mean, I didn’t like the job,” he says. “Who would? You got filthy dirty. In those days you didn’t have fans going because they would blow the posters around. When we were in the Smith building . . . it was an old building, I mean it was roach-infested, you couldn’t put a sandwich down without it being walked away.” He still has one of the first jobs he did in the office, recently unearthed from the vast piles of posters, film, and wooden type— shooting targets for the FBI. “I thought that job lasted forever,” he says. “And it probably did.” After it was done, agents blasted away at a silhouette of the brotherin-law of an artist at Globe. And once you start to notice

with history—a 1938 poster for the Edward G. Robinson movie Little Giant at the Astor Theater hangs next to the counter, having outlasted the venue it advertises. Globe started, according to company legend, at a card game between a wealthy New Yorker and a Philadelphia printer; Baltimore was chosen as a home by folding a map of the East Coast in half and placing the new business on the crease. The posters started rolling off the presses in 1929; carnival and movie posters got them through the Depression years. Joe Sr. started there the day after Thanksgiving, 1934. Frank says his father wanted to buy the place from day one, and in 1974 he finally did. He asked his sons to join him in the business—they had all worked summer jobs there before that, starting out with menial tasks, such as dragging the heavy steel

“WHEN YOU’RE GOING DOWN THE STREET AND YOU LOOK AROUND, EVERYTHING IS WHITE AND GRAY AND BLACK AND BROWN,” BOB CICERO SAYS. “FLORESCENT IS NOT NORMAL—FOR ANYTHING.” them, Globe posters are everywhere—from art magazines to the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Each one, in small print across the bottom, bears the words GLOBE POSTERBALTIMORE, but the Ciceros recognize the company’s work without the name. They can see it in the layout, or something as simple as a recognizable block of type (Globe’s “the” for example, much used, is fairly distinctive). During a recent visit, the Ciceros spread a set of poster collector books across the front counter, with Globe’s original work bookmarked, but even as they go through they see others, made either by Globe or someone closely copying their style, each selling for hundreds, even thousands of dollars to collectors. The walls of the front room of the Highlandtown shop are crowded 14 | city paper

frames, loaded with wooden type, to the presses. Frank, who was frustrated after nine years of working at the Department of Social Services, was the first to take him up on it. Bob came in a few months later, and Joe Jr. a few years after that. Frank, who had dreaded art classes in school, found under the tutelage of Globe artist Harry Knorr that he and Bob had a knack for designing posters, and he enjoyed the work. “After you did one of these, you saw it up in three days,” he says, indicating a sketch for a show poster. “Doing social work, you never saw the finished product. Or if you did,” he laughs, “you were sorry you saw it.” Show business changed, from carnivals to movies to rock ‘n’ roll, and Globe changed along with it,

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developing an iconic style along the way. “We printed posters for just about everybody,” Bob says. “But mostly the show posters. We did boxing, but our mainstay was rhythm and blues.” In a back room, the two brothers pull out a binder of pictures— source material from the past. “Here’s one,” says Frank, “the wrestler—Andre the Giant.” “These are proofs of some of the old ones,” Bob says. “There’s Peggy Lee. I don’t know if you remember her.” “Here’s a folder of James Brown— in his young days, obviously,” Frank says. “We’ve probably got 5,000 or 10,000 pictures.” Another room is stacked with more recent work, such a poster for 1990s Baltimore rock band Liquor Bike and a print for John Waters that made a 2004 cover of Art Forum (TAKE THE WHOLE FAMILY TO

LETTER MEN

16 | city paper

able. “They were loud and blaring,” Bob says.“But we didn’t care. When you’re going down the street and you look around, everything is white and gray and black and brown. Florescent is not normal— for anything. So when you go down there, you see it. We didn’t care how gaudy it looked or how outlandish it looked. As long as it caught your eye, you read it. I can’t force you to go to the show, but if you read the poster—that’s all I cared about. That’s our whole game plan.” It’s a game plan that served the company well. In the heyday of the great touring R&B acts, the orders came in directly from the artists. Tina Turner would call them in herself, as would Solomon Burke. “I got to know him pretty well,” Frank says. A couple of smaller Heidelberg letter presses are still in use—for tickets, mostly—and they sit

“WITH A BUSINESS, [ORDINARILY] THERE’S A TENDENCY THAT IF SOMETHING IS DEFUNCT, YOU JUST GET RID OF IT,” JOE GALBREATH SAYS. “THEY KEPT EVERYTHING.” MARFA, TEXAS). Back in the office, Bob pulls out a poster to demonstrate the style Globe is known for—Otis Redding at the Apollo (7TH ANNUAL SHOWER OF STARS ) featuring Percy S l e d g e , A r t hu r C o n l e y, t h e Manhattans, the Bar-Kays, Bettye Swan, James Carr, the 5 Stairs Steps, Betty Harris, with Sad Sam as the emcee. The style of the poster follows the style of the performance— each of the acts gets its own space on the poster. “What we would do is separate it and make everybody look important,” Bob says. “Look how many acts you’ve got, and you can actually see each one.” “Each ‘cloud,’ as we called them, each section, would be like a writer having a paragraph,” Frank says. ‘It would say that one thought.” Another innovation: In the ’50s, Globe started using day-glow inks, made from fish scales back then, to make the posters more noticeFEBRUARY 4, 2009

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gleaming in a corner of one of the larger rooms. The pair of 5,000-pound Miehle letter presses sit idle, side by side in the back room. Bob demonstrates how the forms locked into place and the rollers speed the posters through, 500 to 800 an hour, fed by hand from a platform at the back. “In those days everything was dangerous,” he says. Globe’s design work is done on computers now and executed mostly using film instead of physical type, a change that started 20 years ago, and there isn’t as much call for the posters. Bob says he used to do 20 or 30 different posters a day, now he’s lucky to get 10 a week. Most of the orders that come in are for the corrugated plastic outdoor signs that herald furniture store liquidation sales. They use the same basic design strategy—separating out each element for a quick read— but have little else in common with


the show posters. The Globe name doesn’t appear on them. Sign ordinances governing what could be posted on city streets have taken their toll on the industry, too, the Ciceros say. There were never that many poster companies, at least not with Globe’s national scale, but that number has dwindled to a handful. “Let’s get one thing straight—it’s hard out there,” Bob says. “The ordinances are killing us. That’s the death of a lot of [printers].” Poster companies like Globe have always kept up with the times, but now they’re looking backward. Hatch Show Prints, which did for country music what Globe did for rhythm and blues, was bought up by the Country Music Hall of Fame and operates as a museum. Last year, Globe started reproducing posters from its extensive back catalog, contracting with a couple of outsiders to market them as Globe Classics—the Ciceros, it seems, know how to sell everything but posters. “It’s a whole different game,” Frank says. “We know printing. That’s what we know.” THEY HOPE TO GO FURTHER BACK, getting the old presses fired up and running again. That would take a significant investment, but Frank says it would be worth it to be able to pass along the trade to a new generation of graphic artists. “That would be totally exciting, to see these kids feel this stuff again,” he says. “I think later on in life it would really have an impact on them.” If there is such a thing as a target audience for a warehouse filled with old typography equipment, it is ably represented by Joe Galbreath. He’s one of the many supporters Globe has acquired over the years, people who wander in for whatever reason and find the Ciceros and their treasure trove of Americana and graphic art. Galbreath, 30, who is finishing up his thesis on Globe for his masters’ degree at the Maryland Institute College of Art, is as excited about Globe as the Ciceros. Galbreath came to Baltimore from Ohio in 2007, and he was at the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame on a trip home when he noticed the Globe imprint on some of the posters hanging there. “There’s something about seeing that GLOBE POSTER-BALTIMORE in Cleveland—I was just really proud about that,” Galbreath says over coffee at a Bolton Hill café. He’s got some time off to work on his thesis, so he’s been spending more time at Globe lately. This is his last year at MICA, and he hopes to teach graphic design. Whether the connec-

tion he’s tried to foster between the art school and the printing company will be carried on after he graduates remains to be seen. “That’s the great thing about Baltimore,” he continues. “In any other city, everybody would know about Globe and that would just be a tapped-out resource, but here it’s just like a gold mine. It’s amazing. There’s still a sense that things can be discovered here.” Galbreath e-mailed the Ciceros in July 2008 to ask about doing research on Globe. A few hours later, he was in Highlandtown looking at the chaotic warehouse full of posters, letters, and equipment. He has become a sort of Globe archaeologist, organizing and cataloging the things he finds buried in the back rooms while the brothers take care of the daily business. “It just blew my mind,” Galbreath says. “It’s just this madness of stuff and history and just everything a graphic designer would be interested in digging around in. It’s this fascinating little world that they’ve been developing for the past 80 years. “With a business, [ordinarily] there’s

a tendency that if something is defunct, you just get rid of it,” Galbreath says. “They kept everything.” There’s a sincerity and immediacy to the posters that Galbreath likes— the Globe posters aren’t made to last forever, just long enough to get the idea across. The form always follows the function. “It’s just on a wall and it does what it needs to do,” he says. “That’s another reason it’s interesting to study Globe in a more scholarly way— they’re aware of communication, which is another goal of design, but they made decisions that a designer would make in different ways and they did it very well. “It’s an interesting thing to look at,” he continues. “The kind of thing that ends up getting put together because it’s just going to get hung up in the street for like, a week. With design, there’s a sense of permanence. Even when it’s not meant to be permanent, you’re still making these decisions based on, you know, we want this to be part of the design realm, whereas with them it’s just this intuitive way of working—it’s just going to get

hung on a wall, then come down and get replaced with something else.” Galbreath hopes that Globe and MICA can form a lasting relationship. Like the Ciceros, he sees a value in learning the old ways, maybe more than they do. “We had talked about doing a little workshop or something like that,” Galbreath recalls. “We had talked about it all morning. And at the end of it Joe said, ‘If you don’t think people would be interested, you can let me know. You won’t hurt my feelings.’ And I was like, ‘I could have 20 people here tomorrow if we could set it up.’ I think there’s a lot of people that are really excited by this stuff.” Galbreath had worked with leadfoundry type before, but never with the large wooden letters and steel forms that Globe has stacked in the large back room. One of the jobs he created for himself was locking up the letters in steel frames put together for Rock and Roll Hall of Fame posters. “They’re in the big metal frame, and all the wood is all in there, locked up,” he says. “Because it’s wood, it kind of shrinks and swells with the tempercitypaper.com

ature, and because some of these things hadn’t been touched in years, sometimes they just pop, and some of the pieces will just fall out onto the ground. So I took those out and kind of re-set them. And just cranking down on it, you hear the wood pop and creak, you know? It’s like an old wood floor. It’s just . . . the only way to get that experience is to be working on a big form and to do it. There’s just something rewarding about it.” Frank Cicero hopes others feel that way. The music industry that the company promoted has changed, and may no longer need them. Cicero never went to many shows—it just isn’t his thing, but he respects the artists who look down from the posters on walls. “There was a real struggle in those days to make it big,” he says. “These guys were eating crackers for dinner. You really don’t see that today. I’m not saying they’re rich when they walk in, but there isn’t that same thing. I’m not saying that was the right way—I don’t want anybody to be starving, that’s not my point, but sometimes in order to appreciate something, you have to earn it.” ■ FEBRUARY 4, 2009

city paper | 17


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BY MARTIN L. JOHNSON AS THE CREDITED DIRECTOR OF BOTH Gone With the Wind and The Wizard of Oz, Victor Fleming has long been the answer to a barroom trivia question. After he died of a heart attack in early 1949, other directors and producers associated with the two movies started to inflate their own role in their production, and criticized Fleming as a macho, anti-Semite, womanizer, more a craftsman than an artist. Michael Sragow, the film critic for the Baltimore Sun who moonlights as a writer of capsule film reviews for the New Yorker, has long been an admirer—and defender—of Fleming’s work. In 1998, when Sragow was a regular freelancer for the New York Times, he published a feature piece on the director for the holiday season, a time when Oz makes regular appearances on television schedules.

the substance of a Hollywood movie. Yet it’s not the instant celebrity tale seen in A Star is Born, but rather a hard-scrabble story. Born in 1889 in Pasadena, after his parents headed west from Missouri during the first of many real estate booms in Southern California, Fleming grew up in San Dimas, 30 miles east of Los Angeles. Fleming’s father died when he was 4, and he went to live on a citrus ranch with his

“HE REALLY MADE [HOLLYWOOD] HIS OWN KINGDOM.” “I think that Victor Fleming made a lot of the movies that a lot of the boomers recognized as defining their sense of the movies, whether they knew it or not,” Sragow says at a Mount Vernon coffee shop. “[Writing about him] was almost like recapturing where I got my sense of movies from.” This past December, 10 years after his initial article on Fleming, Sragow published his first book, Victor Fleming: An American Movie Master, a 656-page narrative biography of Fleming, whose filmmaking career stretched from the early days of Hollywood to its heights in the late 1930s and ’40s. In the process, Sragow uncovers countless colorful anecdotes about Fleming, who left no personal papers for historians to browse, in order to present the director as he might have seen himself. Fleming’s own life could be

aunt and uncle. Like so many other ambitious young men of the period, Fleming threw himself in to everything mechanical and modern, including cars, planes, and the new film industry that was bubbling up in Los Angeles. When Fleming found his way to Hollywood in the mid-1910s, he found an industry very different than the glitz and bauble of the star-obsessed place that began to form in the 1920s. Movie actors such as Douglas Fairbanks, one of Fleming’s friends and first movie subjects, boasted of doing their own stunts and defined themselves as “men of action,” ready to do anything for entertainment. Fleming thrived in an environment where the director was more a fixer than a boss, obsessed with getting the movie done despite hardships. Sragow recalls watching Fleming’s first movie, 1919’s When the Clouds Roll By starring

Fairbanks, as the point when he realized the range of Fleming’s talents. “It’s just amazing to me that this is not known as one of the first great movies of all time,” he says. “It’s incredibly inventive. It shows him working with the biggest star in the world with an incredible freeness and creativity in mocking this guy’s image. Here’s a guy who’s known as a great athlete and entertainer and he’s playing a hypochondriac who is manipulated by a weird psycho-neurologist to be crippled by his superstitions.” As he describes the movie further, Sragow makes what is a characteristic, if unlikely, move in the interview as well as in the book: he draws a comparison between Fleming and a contemporary director. “Charlie Taylor, a film critic and a friend of mine from my Boston Phoenix days, saw it at MOMA and afterward he called and just said something like ‘Charlie Kaufman— suck ass,’” he says. After making this unlikely parallel between Fleming, best known for epics and swashbucklers like Captains Courageous and Treasure Island, and Kaufman, long recognized as the most openly experimental of contemporary mainstream Hollywood directors and screenwriters, Sragow goes on to support his argument by offering examples from the early part of the movie. “He wanted to get away from staged proscenium shooting,” he says. “He knew that the framing had to be different. It couldn’t be stagey. There had to be an active

VICTOR FLEMING (WITH MEGAPHONE) AND ACTRESS CLARA BOW (IN HAT) ANNOUNCE THEIR ENGAGEMENT ON SET IN TEXAS, CIRCA 1927. flow to the imagery. He had an instinctive sense on how to play with an image. “The film opens with an incredible 10-minute sequence, with the goon of a psychologist deliberately feeding the hero, Douglas Fairbanks, terrible foods after midnight—onions, Welsh rarebit, mince pie and lobster,” he continues. “You see them all dancing around in his stomach. Then it turns into this nightmare where he’s escaping these walls that are clutching at him and this mysterious stranger that’s clutching at him, and he jumps through the wall and he’s in a ladies club, and then he jumps into a painting of a pool and he’s in a real pool, and the foods are chasing after him. It’s really as great as Sherlock Jr. or any of those other comedies that we think of as homegrown American surrealism.” While Sragow successfully makes the case for Fleming as an inventive director able to shoot scripts others refused to tackle, such as a 1925 version of Joseph Conrad’s Lord Jim, he has a more difficult time pinning down what it was about Fleming that made him distinctive across a 25 year, 48-movie career. In the course of the book, which assigns a chapter to each major movie Fleming made, Sragow struggles to find middle ground between the two dominating theories of Hollywood history. In the first account, made popular by the film critic Andrew

Sarris, directors, not writers, ac- him. It’s an amazing idea that a tors or producers, are responsible guy in a system as stratified as for the artistry of the cinema. the old Hollywood system could Single-genre directors such as live that way. He really made it Alfred Hitchcock and John Ford his own kingdom when he was received credit for their indi- working.” vidual touches on the movies Sragow’s book also makes a they made, despite changing series of bold assertions about studios, actors, and everything Fleming’s role in shaping the else. Fleming, who made every- star image of actors such as thing from westerns (the 1929 Jean Harlow, Gary Cooper, and early talkie The Virginian) to Clark Gable, and he devotes a horror films (1941’s Dr. Jekyll and chapter to refuting the charges Mr. Hyde), didn’t make a habit of that Fleming was anti-Semitleaving his mark on every produc- ic, which is based on a single tion, and his reputation as a fixer episode on the Gone With the allowed him to get typecast as a Wind set. And while the book is director more interested in mak- written chronologically, Sragow ing movies than statements. says he wrote the chapters on In the second account, popu- Fleming’s Wind and Oz first belarized by film historian Thomas cause he knew readers would Schatz’s book The Genius of the want to know more about System, directors, actors, screen Fleming’s role in two of the best writers, producers and set de- loved American movies. signers are all part But Sragow ends of a system that, up arguing that MORE ARTS through the use of Fleming’s long and {AND POSSIBLY interchangeable staff, varied career, makENTERTAINMENT} consistently produces AT CITYPAPER.COM/ ing successful movhigh quality movies. ies in various genres GO/ARTSMINDS Those who focus and time periods, is only on Fleming’s wh a t m a ke s h i m late 1930s career, when he juggled worth profiling. “This is a several projects at once, tend to guy who deserves more than place him in this category, but a footnote in film history or Sragow argues that Fleming was American history,” he says. more than just a technician. “He “He’s a huge guy.” ■ wrote this studio autobiography called Action Is the Word, and he Michael Sragow gives an really did believe that in movies illustrated talk about Victor and in his life,” he says. “He beFleming at the Creative lieves in spontaneous behavior Alliance at the Patterson Feb. [and] that attracted people to 5 at 7:30 p.m. citypaper.com

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

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Movie Passes and

invite you and a guest to see an advance screening of

R e d L i n e C o r r i d o r Tr a n s i t S t u d y

Citizens’ Advisor y Council will meet on: Thursday, February 12, 2009 7:00 p.m. Woodlawn High School – Cafeteria 1801 Woodlawn Drive Baltimore, MD 21207 This meeting is open to the public.

on Tuesday, February 10th. Stop by Funky Beehive, “A Seriously Fun Store” on Saturday, February 7th at noon and you may receive a complimentary pass.

MENTION THIS AD & RECEIVE 15% OFF Store Wide, Including our Fun Valentine’s Day Gifts & Jewelry! Perfect Gifts for Every Budget!

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*This movie is rated PG-13. While supplies last. You must provide valid identiÀcation in order to receive a ticket. You may only receive tickets once in a 30 day period. No purchase necessary. One pass per person, each good for (2). Pass does not guarantee admission! While supplies last. Employees of Touchstone Pictures, Funky Beehive and City Paper are not eligible.

OPENS NATIONWIDE FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 13th

FAMILY DAY

Created by the Maryland General Assembly, the Citizens’ Advisory Council is tasked with advising the Maryland Transit Administration on the potential impact, economic opportunities, and community concerns of the Red Line Project. The proposed Red Line is a 14 mile east-west corridor connecting the Woodlawn area of Baltimore County, Edmondson Village in Baltimore City, West Baltimore communities, downtown Baltimore and the communities in the vicinity of the Inner Harbor East, Fells Point, Canton, and the Johns Hopkins Bayview Medical Center Campus. For further information on this project or special assistance needs for the meeting, please contact: Lorenzo Bryant, Project Manager Maryland Transit Administration 6 Saint Paul Street Baltimore, MD 21202 Phone: (410) 767-3754 Email: redline@mtamaryland.com www.baltimoreredline.com

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FILM HARD TIMES One woman’s search for her

HE’S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU Directed by Ken Kwapis OPENS FEB. 6

SOME WOMEN LIKE MOVIES about relationships; some don’t. Drew Barrymore does. Her Flower Films production company produced He’s Just Not That Into You, a funny, thoughtful take on the 2004 self-help book of the same name written by Greg Behrendt and Liz Tuccillo. Directed by Ken Kwapis (Sisterhood of the Traveling Pants, He Said She Said), Barrymore plays Mary, an ad rep for Baltimore’s gay paper (get it? Mary?). Yeah, HJNIY’s love, loss, and conversation takes place in Baltimore’s tony rowhouses, slick lofts, and cobblestones, although you might not recognize much beyond the Brewer’s Hill neon sign, bottles of Natty Boh, and a random City Paper mug. Mary is friends with Anna (Scarlett Johansson), a shallow blond singer with a penchant for unavailable men. Anna meets and likes Ben (Bradley Cooper), who is married to Janine (Jennifer Connelly), who works with Beth (Jennifer Aniston), who is in a committed relationship with Neil (Ben Affleck), Ben’s coworker. Janine and Beth also work with Gigi (Ginnifer Goodwin). Although they’re all floating in some sort of self-actualizing fog, Gigi is the one searching for the reason she’s single, even after going on a date with Conor (Kevin Connolly), who buys ads from Mary. Conor’s buddy Alex (Justin Long) befriends Gigi and translates—straight up, no chaser—the language of men.

dog—and her humanity— during personal turmoil BY I A N G R E Y

WENDY AND LUCY Directed by Kelly Reichardt OPENS FEB. 6 AT THE CHARLES THEATRE

THE DESOLATE closed-mill strip-mall town in Wendy and Lucy evokes the neglected post-empire Soviet housing complex of Lukas Moodysson’s great and ignored Lilya 4-ever. There’s the same pall of monochromatic miserabalism, of businesses shuttered, buildings pockmarked and deserted. Used, discarded people dot the landscape like stick-figure ghosts. It’s social depression limned in cold grays, a great power gone neo-Third World. All that’s in essence really changed in Kelly Reichardt’s great new movie is the location; the desolation burg has moved to Oregon, its residents suffering the decline of another empire. Only four movies into her career—one of them the much praised Old Joy—and Reichardt has become the new depression’s minimalist poet of underclass entropy. If you’ve seen the poster, you’ve seen its premise. It’s about a lost young woman named Wendy (Michelle Williams), owner of one pair of cutoffs, a thriftstore shirt, and a worn hoodie, who is accompanied by her beloved mutt, Lucy (Reichardt’s own pooch). Wendy doesn’t so much do: she needs. For unclear reasons, she’s on the run from a “cash-strapped” family in Indiana and needs to get her ’88 Honda clunker and Lucy to Alaska where she thinks she’ll finally find a job, or just escape. Unlike the world around her, Reichardt respects Wendy’s privacy. Tying Lucy to a bike rack outside a grocery store, Wendy tries to nick some dog food only to be pinched by a self-righteous Christian dickhead food stocker (Michael Brophy). His dickishness isn’t a hipster indie-film potshot, but shorthand for both the lunacy of sticking to the letter of the law in lawless times and just how pitifully low in the pecking order the stocker has become: Why, he has a relative with a car that almost works! Take that, homeless bitch! So Wendy goes to jail where nobody appears to know quite what they’re doing or how things work. When she

MICHELLE WILLIAMS CAN’T FIND HER DOG OR CATCH A BREAK. gets out, Lucy is gone and the Honda’s engine is dead. The rest of the movie— co-written by Reichardt and Jonathan Raymond—plays like an extended lowlevel panic attack as Wendy scours the town for her friend. Williams, who played Heath Ledger’s

evoke just as much. It’s her gaze. There’s this awful tremor in her eyes even as her face freezes while a mechanic (Will Patton) adds up the total for the car’s repairs. (Patton’s studied quirkiness is the movie’s sole flaw.) Later, while trying to sleep on

WILLIAMS IS SO FREAKING IN THE TERRIFIED MOMENT SHE’S ACTING ON A VASCULAR LEVEL.

sweet but barely there wife in Brokeback Mountain and a vacuous model in I’m Not There, has shown unique skill at creating dissolving women. But nothing could prepare you for what she does here, which is based to a great extent on the unnerving spectacle of Williams mutely sucking the air out of a scene and then gasping on what isn’t left. Marisa Tomei commits one of 2008’s finest displays of minimalist acting in The Wrestler—creating a deep character out of a shifting lexicon of freighted smiles—but Williams uses even less to

ALSO NEW IN THEATERS THIS WEEK: A WOMAN IS A WOMAN. SEE FILM CLIPS, PAGE 56.

cardboard boxes she dragged into the woods, she’s set upon by a babbling lunatic/possible rapist (art-horror-director and Wendy co-producer Larry Fessenden). Reichardt cuts to an extreme close-up of Wendy’s eyes and her only visible reaction: Her pupils dilate—which means Williams is so freaking in the terrified moment she’s acting on a vascular level. It’s not until the creep leaves and Wendy stumbles to the toilet of a filling station with no name or visible employees that she finally loses her shit, screaming, ripping off her soiled clothes, washing her face like she wants to grind the world off of her. Reichardt does not expose Wendy’s body. To do so would sexualize her, which just makes no sense in a world too exhausted for desire.

Eventually, Wendy finds an ally of sorts in her quest. But as Wendy and Lucy is, at a brisk 88 minutes, much like a flawless short story, we’ll say little of that except that this person offers the black joke that, if you endure long enough, you might even get a job doing nothing in double shifts. Stylistically, Reichardt is elegant to the point of technical invisibility— which makes the one overtly stylized moment all the more devastating. It’s a Kubrickian Steadicam drift past a seemingly endless line of dog cages filled with exhausted, beaten creatures. Also integral to the movie’s success is its brilliantly crafted soundscape. In lieu of music, Wendy offers the rumble and yawn of groaning trains, creaking machinery, and other rusty mechanical last gasps suggestive of an Americana Einstürzende Neubauten. Sam Levy’s cinematography pointedly contrasts and blends the blanched town and lushness of the Oregon woods, suggesting a nil-budget reiteration of I Am Legend’s central visual, of nature in the inexorable process of reclaiming this newly dead world. And Wendy? Despite everything, when an act of absolute selflessness is required she can still come up with it. Despite everything, her humanity is still intact, and Reichardt’s movie is essential, even inspiring citypaper.com

Gigi takes it all in and, although resistant at first, runs with it. Instead of hours by the phone waiting for a call that never comes, she drinks tea and reads on a Saturday night. Still not willing to wait for direct signage, she even misconstrues Alex’s actions during a party he throws, and leans in for a kiss after cunt-blocking a beauty off his couch. That’s one in HJNIY’s collection of dovetailing stories. The strong and handsome ensemble cast here never astounds with their acting: Goodwin is cheerfully adorable and bright, Long is sarcastically dry, Barrymore confused and cute, Aniston businesslike, Affleck looks depressed, Cooper is charmingly manipulative, etc. Jennifer Connelly does a solid job as a pained wife looking for satisfaction in her marriage and, really, why would anyone renovate two connecting rowhouses if the bond wasn’t going to last forever? And Johansson offers up a bombshell so morally wrong it makes hating her feel justified for once. HJNIY’s delve into the territory of dating and mating isn’t world-shattering, but it is entertaining and, although almost too good looking, not too far away from our own relationship backyard. (Wendy Ward)

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

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CORALINE

FILM

Directed by Henry Selick OPENS FEB. 6

WONDERFULLY DARK and amazingly tactile, Coraline uses the same stopmotion animation technique used in director Selick’s other films, The Nightmare Before Christmas and James and the Giant Peach Based on the Neil Gaiman children’s book, Coraline tells the sometimes very scary story of a little girl named Coraline (voiced by Dakota Fanning) whose move with her parents into an old pink Victorian in the forest of Ashland, Ore., spurs an adventure into another realm where she must use her wit and courage to save not just herself, but her parents and even the spirits of children that came before her. Coraline and her seed catalog-writing parents (Teri Hatcher and John Hodgman) move to the run-down and dreary Pink Palace apartments during the rainy season—year-round in Oregon. Coraline’s mother is preoccupied, as is her father, too busy on their computers to pay much attention to Coraline. Her neighbors include the circusy Mr. Bobinsky (Ian McShane) and his fleet of performing mice, aging drama queens Miss Spink (Jennifer Saunders) and Miss Forcible (Dawn French), and the lonely Wybie Lovat (Robert Bailey Jr.), a boy Coraline’s age whose name stands for “Why Born.” Cue the sad music.

POETRY IN MOTION Cathy Cook frames her obsession with poet Lorine Niedecker onscreen BY B R E T M CC A B E

IN ONE OF THE NUMEROUS scenes of quiet grace that run through Immortal Cupboard: In Search of Lorine Niedecker, local filmmaker Cathy Cook turns to Niedecker’s own words to convey some aspect of the poet’s impressive mind. Niedecker—a little-known Wisconsin poet of elegant economy who died in 1970—lived alone for most of her life on Blackhawk Island, near Fort Atkinson, Wisc., in the southern central part of the state. Her poetry is a minimal monument to this area, capturing nature and seasons with an observant eye and breathless precision. Her work is impressive for how much she conveys with so few words, her stark choices so descriptively appropriate. It’s a gift that extended to her prodigious letter writing, as evidence in a short snippet that describes a letter that gives this impressionistic documentary its name. “That was another Cid situation,” Cook says over brunch at a Hampden noshery, referring to the late poet Cid Corman who has always been influential in getting Niedecker’s work known. Trim and direct with reddish brown-framed glasses that almost match her reddish brown hair, Cook talks about Niedecker with a contagious enthusiasm. A Wisconsin native herself, Cook moved to Baltimore about

VERSE TAKES FLIGHT IN A STILL FROM IMMORTAL CUPBOARD. reservoir that houses such precious things, but few can summon such a perfect receptacle of what has shaped your emotional and intellectual life as those two words. This passage is but one anecdote in the documentary, during which time Cook includes images of bookshelves and a label being made that reads IMMORTAL CUPBOARD to identify the shelves. It’s a brief glimpse into

Cook has always been attracted to poetry as a filmmaker, and she responded to Niedecker’s works in kind. “I wanted to get as much [as I could] of my first response to her poetry, visually,” she says. “Whatever tapped into me visually, which is almost automatic, I just said I’m going to go shoot, shoot, shoot, shoot, and then figure out how to construct it.”

“I WANTED TO GET AS MUCH [AS I COULD] OF MY FIRST RESPONSE TO HER POETRY, VISUALLY,” COOK SAYS. “I JUST SAID I’M GOING TO GO SHOOT, SHOOT, SHOOT, SHOOT, AND THEN FIGURE OUT HOW TO CONSTRUCT IT.” three years ago to become an associate professor of film/video at University of Maryland, Baltimore County after a healthy career in film/TV production in New York. “That was in a letter to Cid,” she continues. “He had sent her the little book called For Instance, which I have a copy of. They’re Japanese bound on the outside. They’re beautiful. So when he sends her that little book, that was her response back. ‘You have sent me this precious book. You are now part of my immortal cupboard.’ Her immortal cupboard is where she kept all of her most favorite writings and authors. Poets and scientists were in that.” Every writer maintains a mental

Niedecker’s mental world that Cook What she envisioned at first was a chooses to dramatize obliquely, a stratshort piece using Niedecker’s poetry egy that powers this refreshingly difas a guiding inspiration. “I thought ferent version of a biopic. I was making a half-hour film,” Cook It all started when a friend gave her says. “And I responded to her work and a copy of a Corman-edited I kept responding to it and anthology of Niedecker poresponding to it. And then etry called The Granite Pail. “I I started putting in an acMORE WORDS got this book of poetry, and I tress. And then I started didn’t put it down,” Cook says. putting in poetry. And {AND PICTURES} “I shared so much of what she then I started putting in ABOUT ART was writing about. My life or some stories. And then my observations as an artist MAY BE FOUND AT I said, ‘Well, I might as seemed to parallel what she well go all the way and CITYPAPER.COM/ was observing, and my intry to combine all three GO/ARTSMINDS terests paralleled hers, and it of those things together.’ was about how she observed So it’s not necessarily a things.” documentary, not neces-

sarily a biography, not necessarily a total response experimental film, but a combination of all.” That combination is a viscerally informative medium for Niedecker. Cook’s Immortal conveys Niedecker’s life in a collage of footage—pieces of reenactments, Wisconsin animals and fauna, scenes of manual clothes washing, archival photos, some modest animation, stills that feature Niedecker’s poetry—and sound sources, from nature recordings to interviews Cook conducted with the people who knew Niedecker, and even Niedecker herself in a rare interview that Corman conducted with her shortly before she died. These fragmented moments make Immortal an unconventional way to present a writer’s life, but Niedecker’s life was unconventional—and Cook’s version of it is a fitting tribute. “I just felt that this woman is so fascinating,” Cook says. “It was a matter of passion. It wasn’t even logical—if it was logical, I wouldn’t have done it. It was just pure passion.” As in, when did she first encounter The Granite Pail? “Six and a half years ago,” Cook says. “And I’ve been working on the film ever since.” ■ IMMORTAL CUPBOARD: IN SEARCH OF LORINE NIEDECKER SCREENS FEB. 8 AT THE CREATIVE ALLIANCE AT THE PATTERSON AT 3 P.M.

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Coraline finds a bricked-over mini-door in the house that, once night strikes and the mice show her the way, offers passage to discover her “other” family: a mother who cooks her favorite foods and a father who dotes on her. She visits at night until the other mother and father finally offer her a choice: stay and sew buttons on her eyes like all the characters in the “other” place and stay forever, or. . . . Other mother and father are bad news, but it’s the other mother who is truly sinister and the mastermind behind enticing and keeping the souls of little children—Coraline being just one of many. It’s not easy to decide at what age kids will delight in the real fabric on the figures, the amazing scenes of coordinated jumping mice in a circus ring, the purring and furry wise black cat (Keith David), and the yipping snap dragons in the garden and not be completely frightened of the scary rats, dolls stuffed with sawdust, and web of deception woven by the spidery “other” mother. The fact that Coraline is 3D makes it all the more “real.” (WW) FEBRUARY 4, 2009

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MUSIC

gan line in “Asian Rollers” sound like they’re watching two very different kung-fu movies. And Macchi’s Janis Joplinesque throat moans piercing th rough the sing-song keyboard melody of “Separate Ways” might as well be outright superimpositions of

ing on her Proud Flesh movie with Jenny Graf Sheppard, and Baltimore native Freeman headed out west to live/work/study at Big Sur. And then Holy Mountain contacted Macchi about putting out a rock record, not really knowing that she had this

“WE’RE BASICALLY A COUPLE OF PUBES AWAY FROM A JAM BAND,” NELSON DEADPANS.

ULI LOSKOT

two different tunes. Strange, eccentric elements stitch these contrasting sounds together in the songs, though, whether it be Nelson’s mod percussion in “Separate Ways,” the background whistling and caveman bass in “Asian Rollers,” or the darting electronic noises and peals shooting through “Four Winds” like a skiptracer after a mark. Crazy Dreams Band music is mellifluous yet clumsy, disarmingly melodic yet undeniably ADD, emitting this entropic impulse of desiring chaos while realizing some sense of order is what gives it an insistent groove. Yes, there are danceable rhythms in them there drifting drones, just not in the usual form. Consider it funk for people who know the difference CRAZY DREAMS BAND PLAYS THE WAY IT FEELS IT. between Ecstatic Peace and Bernini’s “The Ecstasy of St. Theresa.” One is an songs, records, puts out an album, somebody would say a subject, like intoxicating intertwining of carnal and then tours behind those same animal reproduction, and we would and sacred rapture. The other is made songs. That’s a bit of a foreign conplay a song around that.” out of marble. cept for Crazy Dreams Band memAfterward, Giovando approached “We’re basically a couple of pubes Crazy Dreams Band barrels bers. The Lexie Mountain Boys don’t Macchi and stated, “‘Me and Nick away from a jam band,” Nelson deadexactly follow that protocol; neither should be in your band,’” Macchi says. pans. “We kind of made a conscious efdown a road to somewhere do Nelson’s other bands, Mouthus and “And I was like, ‘OK, we’ll jam together.’ fort to create a little bit more structure BY B R E T M CC A B E Religious Knives. And the two CDB’ers And we did and it was really fun. And in the songs.” not present, bassist Jake Freeman and we did all sorts of weird stuff and just “Yes, but there’s kind of a looseness in “I DON’T EVEN KNOW where I’m going experimental artist/filmmaker/mutalked and we would all come up with terms of that,” Becker adds. “We jammed with this,” says Lexie Macchi toward sician Chiara Giovando, are previous weird little riffs and stuff and build and things just kind of appear and we’d the end of a convoluted 100-odd minute High Zero festival performers used them up to bigger things.” look at the recordings and go, ‘That’s cool interview about the fast-track career to the more fortuitous side of underThat you can hear that assemblage . . . what’s that doing there?’ I think alof one of Baltimore’s more ephemground music. process during the group’s live sets most all our songs have that dot-dot-dot eral outfits, the rock/not-rock Crazy “We were talking about doing things and on Crazy Dreams Band is the quinholding them together.” Dreams Band. The Lexie Mountain as a ‘rock’ band,” Macchi continues, the tet’s seductive strength, not a glaring It’s a liberating casualness that runs Boys leader/vocalist and erstwhile quotes around rock not fingered, but weakness. Focus on any simultanethrough the unit’s very existence. With City Paper contributor is joined by CDB intonated. “But there’s a lot of things ous single elements in any of Crazy’s all its members heavily involved in drummer Nate Nelson and guitarist/ about this band, which has been a five tracks and nothing about the other pursuits, CDB started playing organist/noisemaker Nick Becker on ghost band that hasn’t done things music makes sense. Macchi sounds out early last spring and quickly esthis mid-November evening, sitting in the usual way, that are unanswered to be singing completely removed tablished a reputation as both a foron the front porch of Becker’s Waverly questions. The next step is midable live band and a home. And they’re running through sort of an x-factor, and that perhaps short-lived experCDB’s almost incidental formation, is really exciting.” iment. Baltimore’s music NOI S E B OX gestation, creative process, and the serNot know ing where community is wonderfully Michael Byrne reviews the new record from Human Host and endipitous recording of the band’s selfy o u’r e g o i n g a n d g e tand incestuously full of side reports from Knoxville’s avant-music droolfest Big Ears . . . Al titled debut, out late last year on that ti ng t here a ny way is a hustlers and one-offs, and Shipley reports on two nights of Aural States Fest and also presents the latest installation of his Club Beat series, this glossy third-eye label Holy Mountain. perfectly casual encapit’s sometimes heartbreakweek with Debonair Samir . . . Ray Cummings previews this An ashtray full of butts (to which evsulation for this woozily ing to see a local band you Thursday’s Ben Folds show . . . and plenty more up-to-the minute erybody has contributed) rests on the groovy quintet. The band like whose members also local music news, rants, and apologies. deck, near one—two?—empty bottles formed following an exdo about 400 other things, of red wine (ditto). And nobody minds temporaneous Januar y because it might not play NOISE .CIT Y PAPER .COM this wandering down an idea alley 2008 collaboration at the out aga i n for a good 10 without knowing why. Golden West Café involvmonths—if at all. She started by recounting a convering Freeman, Macchi, and Nelson. from Nelson’s meandering beat and Crazy Dreams Band could’ve been sation with a fellow local musician “It was like an improv-comedy type Becker’s ghostly organ in “Four Winds just that sort of beast. People tour about being in a more conventional of thing,” Nelson says. “Somebody of the Owl.” Giovando’s ethereal vowith their other units, Giovando was band—you know, one that writes would shout out, ‘punk rock,’ and cals and Becker’s crudely exotic orcurating visual art shows and work-

DESTINATION UNKNOWN

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FEBRUARY 4, 2009

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kinda, sorta “rock” band on the side. So over last summer the group found 24 available hours to head into Lord Baltimore Studios with Rob Girardi and lay down the record, in the process rediscovering ways to recreate some of the sounds from jam sessions and live performances. “Because when you’re recording you’re in an entirely different configuration than when you’re practicing, and because of our time constraints— if we had more time it would be a different record,” Macchi says. “But I like that it’s this sort of kiln-fired version of what has actually happened live. The whole experience with the band was, essentially, a weird rock ‘n’ roll boot camp. This album is like a document of a period that we were all in.” And now it’s all up in the air again. Giovando currently attends graduate school in California. Freeman is considering moving to California. Jorge Martins now plays guitar with the group. And Becker, Macchi, and Nelson each have their individual pursuits in addition to this group. Crazy Dreams Band, however, continues evolving—moving toward whatever may be next. “That’s the best thing about the name of the band,” Macchi says. “It can be whatever it needs to be.” CRAZY DREAMS BAND PLAYS THE TALKING HEAD FEB. 5 WITH LARKIN GRIMM AND VOWS.

LOCAL BIN

Cotton Jones PARANOID COCOON (SU I CI D E SQU EEZE)

IN THE WAKE of the indefinitely onhiatus pop outfit Page France, some-


thing of a local scene orphan in its active years, frontman Michael Nau has gone on to found Cotton Jones (nee Cotton Jones Basket Ride) with a few other folks from PF. The result is a demure pop-rock ensemble fitted w i t h L u n a - i s h We s t e r n accents and sharing a dreamy, underwater vibe with bands such as Beach House and, well, Luna. The band’s full-length debut, Paranoid Cocoon, is an allaround solid affair, the sort of thing whose songwriting meticulousness promises it a long shelf life. The record essentially has two suits, both well-fitting. After a slinky guitar into, Cotton Jones gets right away into a Doors mode—dude sounds like Jim Morrison and the organ wafts in the bac kg rou nd reek of t hat band’s lame dr ugg y psychedelia. But Cotton Jones is a c ra f t ba nd , a nd t h is song, “Up a Tree (Went This Heart I Have),� blooms into an elaborate, and enjoyable, arrangement, embellished by micro guitar riffs, pretty female backing vocals—that coincide with some of the record’s best moments—and muffled horn. Moreover, it swings. And then, on track two, “Gotta Cheer Up,� the record’s internet-traveling single, it’s a similar v ibe with added propulsion and a sweet whistled melody in the background. (Whistling along is an option a few times on Cocoon.) Nice, but it’s still not the band at the best. That’d be when Cot ton Jones gets really dreamy— l i ke, wa ke-up-snappingyour-fingers-in-time dreamy. The understated “By Morning L ight� feels like a comforting hand on your shoulder. Nau sings, in a lilt somewhere between Dylan and Dean Wareham, “Love said, ‘M ike, maybe this time you’re right’/ then of course disappeared into the white.� A nd, w ith its sweeping slide guitars and long, warm organ drones, “Cotton and Velvet� feels like one of the most accurate song titles imaginable. A lovely ride, throughout. (Michael Byrne)

IT’S KICKBALL

Ogun CHECKMATE ( RE A L O N PU R PO SE / A RC H ITE C TS RE CO RDI NG STU DIO )

AMONG BALTIMORE hiphop’s frontrunners, Ogun isn’t the most dazzling lyricist, but he has arguably had the most heart—or at least been the most willing to wear it on his sleeve. His profile having steadily risen since 2007’s Bmore Hero mixtape, the new Checkmate is positioned as a decisive move to asser t Ogun’s dominance, pairing his roaring voice with the most aggressive production of his career. Mike Savage’s beat for “Ride� is a rumbling beast of drums and synths, and Baltimore club producer Blaq Starr contributes the uncharacteristically slow, creeping “Repetition.� At its best, Checkmate steamrolls forward with one anthemic banger after another, like a low-budget version of Young Jeezy’s The Recession.

If Checkmate’s slick first half leaves any lingering suspicions that Ogun is selling out, however, “Noseyâ€? preempts those criticisms by perfectly summing up the conscious/gangsta line he straddles: “my style can’t be labelled/ the same hand that feeds you will smack the shit out you.â€? From that stern assertion onward, the dirt-underneath-the-fingernails introspection and social conscience of earlier Ogun albums are on more prominent display. “Remember Me,â€? dedicated to fallen friends DJ K-Swift and Mr. Wilson, and the live staple “It’s Alrightâ€? both suffer from monotonous choruses that confirm that hooks are still not Ogun’s strong suit. But both feature enough kernels of wisdom and honesty that it’s impossible to believe that his quest to get the props he deserves will ever lead Ogun to abandon his principles. (Al Shipley) â–

L I ST E N I NG PART Y

Stars of the Lid MUSIC FOR NITROUS OXIDE {S EDIMENTAL}

MUSIC FOR NITROUS OXIDE was released in 1994 under wily camouflage: It looked exactly like a typical indie-rock album, right down to the ungainly band name, enigmatic title, shoddy art, and hand-of-Malkmus cover lettering. It sounded nothing at all like the frenetic, abrasive guitar music of the era, however—more like a soundtrack for calving glaciers. It was, in fact, one of the first unassuming salvos in an indieambi-experimental revolution that reverberates to the present day, when the plangent drone is an everyday staple right up there with AutoTune. Fifteen years after the fact, original label Sedimental has remastered, redesigned, and re-released MNO back into the world it in some small way helped shape. Jumping off from Eno, Pärt, and Talk Talk, Texans Brian McBride and Adam Wiltzie experimented with guitar hum fed through effects, field recordings, sound bites, and other assorted sonic ephemera, boiling it all down to nine extended four-track recordings for their debut. What’s striking now about this early SOTL, despite its soporific feel, is how raw it is, how rough, how close in texture, if not tempo or emphasis, to the amp-soaked, feeding-back sound of more ordinary mid-’90s indie, “(Live) Lidâ€? and “Tape Hiss Makes Me Happyâ€? in particular. (The fact that many of the pieces are essentially two-chord grinds doesn’t hurt the resemblance.) “Downâ€? and the throbbing “The Swellsong,â€? on the other hand, stand as forerunners of the more polished, melodic sound the duo would go on to pursue and push to a pinnacle with 2001’s epic The Tired Sounds of Stars of the Lid. While the piped-in snippets of dialog from Star Trek: The Next Generation, Apocalypse Now, and random evangelists indelibly mark MNO as a product of the ’90s, this music otherwise sounds like it could have been recorded last week. (Lee Gardner)

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BOOKS FUNNY GAMES Snark—is it the lazy evil David Denby says it is? BY J O H N BA R RY

IRONY SUPPOSEDLY DIED earlier this decade. Auden’s “September 1, 1939,” was being blogged, e-mailed, googled, and occasionally dusted off by columnists who pounced on its “low dishonest decade.” Enough of Seinfeld. Another world war had begun. Or, as Vanity Fair editor Graydon Carter put it in a quote that became viral among the talking heads, “I think it’s the end of the age of irony. Things that were considered fringe and frivolous are going to disappear.”

NONFICTION Denby has sniffed out a dead mouse in the American idiom that stinks, and with the persistence of a rude guest, he’s started checking out the garbage can, under the sofas, and elsewhere, for the source. He surfs his way through the classics—college blogs and gossip columnists. Snark being a polemic and not investigative journalism, Denby never takes the time to engage one of those snarking, snarling, angry puppies he’s talking about. That’s probably because he doesn’t know where they live. Speaking of the web site Gawker, he notes, “[M] any of its writers come from outside of New York.” Then, digging further, in a New York magazine piece he finds that Gawker writers don’t make enough money to live decently in Manhattan. What he

changes. The truth is, for better or for worse, humor is no longer the province of the Capital Steps, or Tom Lehrer. It’s become a form of pushback, a political weapon, and a survival tactic. The media offers the old jokes. The masses supply the punchlines. “[S]nark flatters you by assuming that you get the contemptuTHE MEDIA OFFERS THE OLD JOKES. ous joke,” Denby writes, with a THE MASSES SUPPLY THE PUNCHLINES. smattering of contempt, “you’ve been admitted, or readmitted, to a club.” You mean a club that accepts the public as a member? Six years ago, some of America’s does know is that they’re ruining No such luck. In his new book most respected columnists—the everything: journalism, reputaSnark (Simon and Schuster), New same ones wiping their hankies tions, the national mood. Yorker film critic David Denby ofover the inauguration—were on It’s not that he doesn’t have a fers a 144-page polemic against the USS Abraham Lincoln gazing point. As the lines between intera breed of irony that has become slack-jawed in awe at the bulge net and print media gradually disvirulent in the internet age. Snark in George Bush’s flight suit. But solve, standards are threatened. is irony written by resentful and the snarkers—the ones who, as People are pissing and blowing often anonymous hacks, bitter Denby puts it, “[a]ssume anytheir nose in the same waters that and underpaid, irresponsible and thing negative said about someestablished journalists have to petty, fringe and frivolous, who one with power is true”—were flounder around in now. There’s pull the rug out from overachievalready tapping away, pissing much to dislike: the lack of graviers, and yearn for the days when all over the moment. tas, the cheap humor that derives they may replace them. Maybe instead of a broadside, from jokes that “everybody gets,” Speaking as a freelancer, I’ll try sn a rk deser ves a l it t le more the anonymous wankers that pernot to take that too personally. credit than Denby gives it. The vade the same blogs that may also On one hand, Denby is attacking night before the inauguration, link to, say, Frank Rich’s righteous is the great unwashed, the anoni n D upont C i rc le, t hou sa nd s indignation. ymous gossips who spend their of shoes were being hurled at In the internet age, humor has time blindsiding others. Gawker, 30-foot high inflatable Bush. Is become viral and, sometimes, Wonkette, Perez Hilton, all fall that snark? Yes. It’s fringe. It’s destructive. But snooping around into that group. And there’s a frivolous. It’s snide. It riffs on web sites to back up that obvibrief broadside at a critic writan old joke. And the next day, a ous proposition only tells part of ing for the New York Observer. In new president was telling us to the story. Why is the prevailing the upper echelon of the profesput aside childish things. But if sense of humor so bitter? Denby sion, for good measure, Denby I made enough money freelancdoesn’t pursue that question in ta kes on colu m n ist Mau reen ing to spare a pair of shoes, I’d depth, although he assumes that Dowd, t he empress of sna rk . have aimed one straight at that the writers who practice it can’t He also goes af ter Tom Wolfe, inflated crotch. With all due reget the good jobs. But there’s Fox News, and Chris Matthews. spect to Denby, a conmore to it than that. But the brunt of his contempt trarian and eloquent A merica is a humoris directed at “investigative recritic in his own right, d r iven cou ntr y, a nd porting’s bastard, weak-limbed MORE WORDS there are times in when the times change child”—those who leave people AND PICTURES history when a well and the pop-cultural naked and dangling, defenseABOUT BOOKS AT aimed shoe—and an n a r r at ives ja m me d less, without attribution. “It’s CITYPAPER.COM/ army of snarky, anonGO/ARTSMINDS down our throats get the bad kind of invective—low, y mous bloggers— cartoonishly simple, teasing, snide, condescending” says it all. ■ t he se n se o f hu mor that he’s after.

Outliers: The Story of Success BY MALCOLM GLADWELL LITTLE BROWN AND COMPANY; HARDCOVER

Completing a trilogy of pop-culturish sociological works, Malcolm Gladwell continues to deliver in his new Outliers: The Story of Success. Gladwell’s work here follows his near-trademarked pattern of taking strikingly odd stories and studies, pointing out a magical kernel common to all of them, one that, when analyzed intensely, serves to explain away that which at first blush appeared so terribly strange. In Outliers, Gladwell uses this template to persuade you that an individual’s intelligence will not get him or her very far in life without a strong cultural legacy serving as a vital “prop.” Gladwell elucidates this in part by exploring the lives of two savants, Chris Langan and Robert Oppenheimer. Langan, a no-BS erstwhile bouncer, retains the higher IQ of the two individuals, measured at right around 200. He was forced to leave college after his mother failed to fill out a relatively measly financial aid form that would have allowed him to continue his scholarship-funded schooling. Oppenheimer—the man who led the U.S. initiative to build the first atom bomb—at one point attempted to poison his university professor, and he was allowed back to Cambridge University with but a slap on the wrist. Gladwell extracts a main component of his thesis from narratives like this one—namely, the idea that nurture plays a vastly greater role in a person’s development than nature. All the Langan/Oppenheimer comparison proves is that a person’s background and genes are actually two equal parts of a greater whole. Practically speaking, Gladwell points out the weakness of placing a high cultural value on the idea of innate genius while ignoring the factors that enabled such a genius to develop. An overtly stated manifesto on how to address this assumption is missing from the pages of Outliers, but that idea is implicitly suggested by the provocative force of Gladwell’s keen prose. In Gladwell’s more progressive perspective, the world could be revolutionized for the better once we accept and positively exploit the realization that different communities are blessed and cursed with a mixed-bag of developmental advantages coupled with potentially devastating flaws. The day that we learn to systematically apply that which currently works so well for some groups to all members of the human family will, in Gladwell’s view, beckon a second renaissance. (Eli Perlow) citypaper.com

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

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ART EAST AND WEST Cultures and ideas collide in

QUICK SKETCHES BALTIMORE INFILL SURVEY Baltimore Office of Promotion and the Arts visual art coordinator Gary Kachadourian’s latest project seeks to tackle one of the city’s eyesores: vacant lots and buildings. The Baltimore Infill Survey is a “Flickr-based site that has been set up as a forum to discuss how this resource may be used.” Potential participants are invited to download an image—from flickr.com/photos/baltimoreinfillsurvey—and “alter it with a possible vision for how these spaces can be used again.” This specific space is a middle-of-the-block vacant lot and the adjacent vacant homes. The lot is approximately 85 feet wide. Download the image, modify it with an idea, and send it with any accompanying text to gkachadourian@promotionandarts. com to be posted to the Flickr site. This project is being coordinated by the Baltimore Office of Promotion and the Arts and the Baltimore Design Conversation. The fifth installment of the Baltimore Design Conversation’s interactive talk series occurs Feb. 4 at the Windup Space from 6:30-8:30 P.M., and features Eric Gordon (from hub2.org), George Kleb (Operation Reachout Southwest’s SNAP), Sarah Zaleski (Baltimore Sustainability Plan), and architect Steve Ziger.

heady installation show BY A L E X E B S T E I N

TWO PERSON JURIED EXHIBITION: LIZ ENSZ AND EUN WOO CHO THROUGH FEB. 7 AT SCHOOL 33

SCHOOL 33’S TWO-PERSON SHOW, guest-curated by Andrea Pollan of Washington’s Curator’s Office, presents the new work of two female installation artists, Baltimore’s Liz Ensz and New York’s Eun Woo Cho. Both artists work large scale with mixedmedia, using intentionally limited palettes in these pieces. With much of the work created specifically for this show, it’s a serendipitously appropriate pairing. Ensz and Cho separately tackle unique cultural tribulations, from a similarly intense, personal perspective. The two projects, focusing on questions of religious and cultural identity, fill the space both vertically and interactively, with an even split between the artists’ respective Western and Eastern motifs. Historical religious strife is a recurring theme in Ensz’s work, and in her new pieces, “Does the Light of God Blind You or Lead the Way Home for You?” and “This End Is a Beginning, This Beginning Is an End,” she revisits these concerns. Abandoning her typically vibrant palette, Ensz’s enormous fabric pieces are a minimal, and conspicuously allegorical, black and white. Reusing previous patterns of religious symbols—the Star of David, crosses, and the Islamic star and crescent moon—interspersed with various artillery, Ensz uses a fabric reduction process called devoré to create murky, translucent tapestries of tense

AN INSTALLATION VIEW OF EUN WOO CHO’S WORK. larly decorative, translucent panels. Her clean, exact hand translates seamlessly from medium to medium. The functioning, labor-intensive fountain and velvet backdrop still invite a comparison to religious holy places—without any blatant, religious iconography—rather than a specific, religious affiliation. Ensz has admit-

CHO’S PIECE CELEBRATES THE BEAUTY OF THE FEMALE FORM WHILE GRAPPLING WITH THE CULTURAL STIGMAS PLACED ON IT. imagery. Hung from floor to ceiling like the walls tedly allowed the current, political spectrum of a sanctuary, the back-lit images glow with a to influence her art and, with this piece, offers a false lull, mimicking their religious origins. cautiously optimistic view of the future. While the presentation is beautifully solemn, Cho’s installation primarily involves video “Does the Light” lacks the subtlety of Ensz’s col- and presents images extracted from a previous orful works, which are so awesomely dense and live performance, “Red Skirt Project.” Television elaborate that their political overtones often screens rest on wooden props from the initial come as a surprise. Here, you feel prompted by performance, dressed with fake flowers and Cho’ her color choices, and somewhat expect to look signature red ribbons. The videos show young for the ominous. Ensz pairs this piece women dressed provocatively in red, with a contrastingly hopeful, white interacting with the props and repeatfountain in front of a marble-like veling at variously distorted lengths the MORE WORDS vet wall. Using a floral design, Ensz word “ma,” the Korean (and univer{AND PICTURES} invokes images of cyclical renewal— sal) word for “mother,” as they make buds to wilting blooms and back to their way through the set. Cho’s piece ABOUT ART buds again. “This End Is a Beginning, is purposely feminine, with the speThis Beginning Is an End” is only the MAY BE FOUND AT cific, personal context of the artist’s second time Ensz has used fiberglass Korean heritage. CITYPAPER.COM/ in an installation. With astonishing The video alternates between the GO/ARTSMINDS craftsmanship, she has wielded the original, white lighting, and a chaotic, material into a flawless, three-dimenred filter. The shots in natural lighting sional Moorish fountain, with simiare close-cropped, and personal, fol28 | city paper

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

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lowing faces and bodies closely. The girls interact playfully, revealing and re-concealing their breasts and emphasizing their naked legs. The red scenes show wooden props suspended from ribbon, the chanting intensifies, and the girls struggle to climb to an unreachable, precarious summit. An assemblage of cryptic fragments and symbols add up to a perpetually ambiguous sentiment, and its power is in that ambiguity. With continually looping references to a collective struggle, shame, and a desire to remain connected to one’s roots while exploring conflicting ideals, the video is never resolved. Cho explores the simultaneous omnipresence of the duality of existing in two cultures and the perspectives it forces on her. The piece celebrates the beauty of the female form while grappling with the cultural stigmas placed on it. As an installation, the original performance is dissected and re-examined, edited and multiplied on five monitors, affording a glimpse into Cho’s creative process. Exhibited between photographs from the same performance and abstract sketches, the work reads as the past, present, and future of the piece as it continues to go through its various, dynamic mutations. Cho is constantly exploring and reinterpreting “identity” through her art. With both installations sharing visual and thematic similarities, the overall exhibition is visually powerful and dense in its subtext. Together, the two pieces echo one another’s elaborate simplicity, a struggle to place themselves within the context of their roots and their art. Ornate decoration becomes chaotic paranoia, which in turn melts fluently into temporary resolutions, where their questions are picked up again. ■

CALL FOR ENTRIES The College of Notre Dame of Maryland’s Gormley Gallery has announced its 20th National Drawing and Print competitive exhibition. Drawings and prints in any media— save photography—are eligible, with a minimum of $1,500 available in purchase prize money. The deadline is Feb. 6. Visit drawingandprint.wufoo. com/forms/20th-national-drawing-print-exhibit for more details. OPENINGS The Art of Collecting opens Feb. 5 at the Gormley Galley with a reception from 4:306:30 P.M. An exhibit of MICA student Mónica López-González’ color photographs opens at An die Musik Feb. 5 with a reception from 6-8 P.M. Friends with Benefits (or how 143 means I love you)—Art Under Ground Studio’s second-annual Valentine’s exhibit saluting the better half—opens Feb. 7. To the Teeth —works by a group of artists from the Creative Alliance at the Patterson’s resident artists and their colleagues—opens Feb. 6 with a reception from 6-9 P.M. as part of the Creative Alliance’s open house. Yo! The Power of Love in 3-D!—featuring works by members of the Charles Theatre Workers Union—opens at the theater Feb. 5 with a reception from 7-9 P.M. Erotica ‘09: “Callipygian Desiderata”—Christina McCleary and Trudy Babchak derriere-inspired works—opens at Gallery 1448 Feb., 6 with a reception from 6-8 P.M. Faceless Pinups—paintings by local artist Elisa Wells —opens at the Ottobar Feb. 6 at 6 P.M. Allison Pasarew’s solo work goes up in Dougherty’s Irish Pub Feb. 5 with a reception from 6-9 P.M. LAST CHANCE Talking Heads . . . Figuratively Speaking—the group show of Rebecca Waring, Regina Brown, G il Jawetz, Thomas Del Porte, and Craig Paul Nowak—closes Feb. 5 at Gallery 321.


STAGE GRAY GARDEN An absent older brother’s gift to his younger sibling adds color to an otherwise perfunctory life BY B R E T M CC A B E

THE EAGLE HAS LANDED By Fool’s Proof Theatre THROUGH FEB. 8 AT THEATRE PROJECT

AS MARY PEARSON and Britt Jurgensen push, pull, and spin a table on wheels and a portable closet across the Theatre Project’s tight stage and Ben Phillips darts between them as if passing cars, the three versatile members of Fool’s Proof Theatre turn this stark stage into a fanciful version of New York. Phillips’ Marvin has just arrived from Germany in pursuit of his brother Jonathan (also played by Phillips), whom he hasn’t seen in 20 years. Marvin is a rather OCD BBC radio reporter, a man so used to order that he makes an oral diary of his life on cassette tapes and barely notices that his co-worker Julie (Pearson) has a mammoth crush on him. No, once calm, collected Marvin receives a postcard from Jonathan with a return address in Germany, he’s compelled to find him, flashing back to the night Jonathan left—and was supposed to take him with him.

that characterizes Marvin’s life before his globetrotting adventure, a life so muted and neutral it may as well be unexamined. The on ly times color enters the stage is when Marvin sets off in search of Jonathan, armed only with the return address in Germany. There, he meets a woman (Jurgensen) with whom Jonathan lived a brief spell, but many years ago. Clad in a blue-green floral print dress, she tells Marvin about his brother. And just like that Eagle f lashes back as Phillips removes the glasses to become Jonathan, and he and the woman are involved and living together, parting on less than amicable terms. She gives Marvin the leather jacket, and his next clue takes him to New York, where Jonathan lived as one side of a love triangle with female performance artist (Pearson) and her

Julie, a character who deserves her own play or at least a reality show. (And both Jurgensen and Pearson have a ball morphing from the Mexican prostitutes who rob Marvin one minute and the nuns who take care of him the next.) But Phillips carries most of the play, creating in Marvin a man who is a tad pitiful but remains sympathetic and, in Jonathan, a man who has to be charismatic enough to make you believe a string of wome n c o u l d f a l l for him. It’s a delicate balancing act, and Phillips wisely doesn’t try to create two entirely different people, but characterizes the brothers as different aspects the same man. Phillips speaks as an almost school-boyish nerd as Marvin, and becomes a confident experience seeker as the live-wire Jonathan, and as Marvin

The ensuing journey, over both physical distance and memory, is the plot of the dramatic comedy The Eagle Has Landed, the play the Liverpoolbased Fool’s P roof developed in conjunction w it h L i nd a Ker r Scot t of London’s Complicite theater group. The play itself is less concerned with what Marvin learns about his brother than what he learns about himself during this process. And while such a theme is fairly pedestrian, the three performers realize it with such versatile enthusiasm and imaginative BEN PHILLIPS (LEFT) CHATS WTH MARY PEARSON IN SILHOUETTE brio that Eagle becomes an makes a few appearances, impressive showcase for follows in Jonathan’s litfemale lover (Jurgensen). but outside his tape recordFool’s Proof doing so much eral footsteps, aspects of The trail eventually leads er, the small box in which with so little. Marvin to a remote New Jonathan slowly begin he stores his cassettes, a Very little: Eagle dresses to surface in Marvin— Mexico café and a Mexican black leather jacket he inits stage sta rk ly, w ith suggesting that, just mayprison. herits from his only that rollbe, searching for Jonathan En route, Marvin learns a brother, and the ing table, the is more i mpor ta nt for bit more about Jonathan the black-framed wheeled closSTAGE, SCREEN, Marvin than finding him. womanizer and opportunglasses Marvin et, and a chair. AND SOMETIMES And it all takes place at a ist, thanks to the women wears, the play These three MEAN ONLINE AT nearly break-neck speed. CITYPAPER.COM/ relies little on who dotted his life. Kudos items become GO/ARTSMINDS Briskly plotted—one act to Pearson and Jurgensen, props. And evcars, pr ison unwinding in just more who each juggle a handful erything and bars, a café’s inof roles with wit and energy. than an hour—and full of ever ybody is terior, a perforconstant motion and witPearson, especially, delights outfitted in gray tones— mance artist’s apartment, ty stagings, The Eagle Has Marvin’s gray shirt and as the jaded, sensuous pera German flat, Marvin’s Landed is less about story charcoal pants and Julie’s formance artist, a stoic Spartan home, and the BBC per se than the deft and cowboy in New Mexico, prim professional skirt suit. research office where Julie spirited telling of it. ■ and the eternally bubbly works. Marvin’s suitcase It’s a monochromatic mood

CURTAIN TIME THE LOF/T Local wordsmith and performance lecture artist Ric Royer sent out an e-mail announcement last week trumpeting the semiofficial opening of the Load of Fun black-box theater— the LOF/T, for short—which he will program. With a 150-person seating capacity and a goal of an event per week, it’s a welcome intimate, multi-purpose performance space in town, the ideal venu e f o r t h e r e c e n t Sam McPheeters spoken-word stop on his tour with opening performance art from Stephanie Barber and Lauren Bender’s poetry-qua-video installation. Royer hopes to keep the programming nimble and varied—as he put it, to make the LOF/T a “comfortable and reliable home for the experimental, the weird, the indefinable, the unspeakable, the smart and the stupid”—as well as a film series and a “show and tell” series already in the planning stages. The IE Reading Series has made the space its new home, making its first stop there Feb. 7 at 8 P.M. OPENINGS The Baltimore Shakespeare Festival presents its sixth annual Te e n Pe r f o r m a n c e Program with The Tempest Feb. 5 at 8 P.M. at St. Mary’s Outreach Center; it runs t h r o u g h Fe b . 1 5 . Ly n n Nottage’s Fabulation, or the Re-education of Undine officially opens Feb. 3 at Center Stage at 8 P. M . and runs through March 8. And if you need a little more generic pizza z z, J e s u s Christ Superstar hits the Lyric Opera House Feb. 6 and 7. LAST CHANCE The Vagabond Players’ two one-act musicals, Romance/ Romance, concludes this weekend, with shows at 8 P . M . Friday and Saturday night and a 2 P . M . Sunday matinee.

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Instant ramen isn’t just for broke college students BY H E N RY H O N G

SO I GUESS I’m on a mini-crusade to restore dignity to what I feel are unjustly besmirched processed/ convenience foods, and in terms of general-disdain-to-awesomeness ratio, instant ramen is without question deserving of advocacy. Though the whole “starving college student” onus seems to have shifted to Easy Mac and Cheese as of late, many view instant ramen as a quasi-food, good only for its convenience and low cost. But the enlightened know that a package of decent ramen, an egg, and some leftovers combine for a damn fine repast, and usually for under a dollar. “Ramen” is the Japanese pronunciation (“ramyun” in Korean) of an undetermined Chinese term, possibly “la-mien” (stretched noodles) or “lo-mein” (boiled noodles). Ramen differs from other noodles in that an alkaline solution is used in the dough, which lends the noodles a firm springy texture, while imparting a yellowish hue. Ramen noodles are generally thin to allow for fast cooking, and the characteristic crinkles are possibly the result of fresh straight noodles being squeezed into balls for storage.

HENRY HONG

Valentine’s Day Menu

EAT ME NOODLED

Even in cities with large Japanese populations, good ones are hard to come by, and here in Baltimore we are totally SOL. Making ramen from scratch is really difficult (trust me on this), but luckily instant ramen is widely available, inconceivably cheap, and can be truly delicious. For this we have one brilliant individual to thank, the late Momofuku Ando. Born in Japanese-occupied Taiwan, he invented a method of precooking, drying, and then flash-frying

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IF YOU’VE GOT SOME KIMCHI, YOU’RE FREAKIN’ GOLDEN.

WE NOW DELIVER TO BALTIMORE NEIGHBORHOODS AND HOTELS!

Complimentary Parking 7i` ->Ì 316 N. Charles Street 410-528-1222 cazbarbaltimore.com "«i Ê > ÞÊ££> ÊUÊ-Õ `>ÞÊ{« 30 | city paper

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Like so many great foods, ramen was originally a humble workingclass staple, and became popular in Japan via Chinese immigrants; they are also called chuka soba, or “Chinese noodles.” In Japan, the dish exploded in popularity and variety. Flavor preferences came to vary vastly by region, city, even neighborhood, and ramen shops eventually resorted to terrific levels of culinary rigor to separate themselves in the hyper-competitive milieu. Secret recipes utilizing dozens of ingredients and several days of cooking time have elevated the once utilitarian broth into something of an art form (as illustrated in the cult-classic film Tampopo). Unfortunately for us in the States, ramen shops don’t enjoy the same market saturation as say, sushi bars.

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noodles that enabled mass production, prolonged storage and rapid preparation. This also put to use a massive influx of cheap U.S. wheat flour, a result of the post-WWII rebuilding effort. Hooray for cultural clusterfucks! The use of powdered synthetic compounds (the muchdefamed MSG and its many variants) allowed for an inexpensive powdered base that simulates the savoriness of long-simmered broth. Global adoption ensued. The problem with this method is the frying, which imbues the noodles with cheap, unhealthy oil. In fact, when I was a kid I remember a scandal involving a Chinese manufacturer that fried their noodles in used motor oil. In any case, I like to pre-boil the noodles, rinse away the oil, and then proceed with fresh water. Lots

canned tuna works well. And if of brands now sport “non-fried” nooyou’ve got some kimchi, you’re dles, so choose those if fat content is a freakin’ golden. (See citypaper. concern. Also, the MSG and MSG-like com/eat for tips.) Some brands compounds send sodium content include dehydrated vegetables or soaring, although actual allergies even seafood, all to recreate a meal are exceedingly rare. Claims of bein a bowl like you’d find at a ramen ing MSG-free are mostly semantics; shop. It’s a weird hybrid of snack bet on all containing some form of food and home cooking, a treat or it. The best solution is to simply not delicacy even. People who’ve only drink all the broth. But as anyone ever had Top Ramen or Oodles of who’s gotten lost in the reverie that Noodles understandably tend to is a steaming bowl of noodles can reject this concept. But the good attest, that ain’t so easy to do. If the stuff can elicit a powerful, gnawbreadth of your ramen experience ing yen. Sometimes you just gotta consists of the standard flavor tethave some ramen. rad of beef, chicken, shrimp and, of Take for instance, Thanksgiving course, the ambiguous, quaintly of’03. The annual post-turkey family fensive “Oriental,” a trip to an Asian yoot (Korean dice) tournament was supermarket will be a revelation. just underway when my frequently There, entire aisles are devoted to tardy uncle made a grand entrance the genre—at Lotte Plaza in Ellicott bearing, inexplicably, a half bushel City I stopped counting at 70 variof steamed crabs. And crabs you eties, with flavors ranging from gotta eat hot, so the gambling was user-friendly Chinese roasted pork, paused while we gluttonto deeply satisfying Korean ously piled crustacean spicy kimchi, to downright atop fowl in our gullets. intimidating Taiwanese But as many Korean papickled mustard. GET A LITTLE rental types will tell you, a Indeed, instant ramen, FLAVOR PACK meal just isn’t a meal until especially (but of course ONLINE AT CITYPAPER. you’ve had some kimchi, not exclusively) among COM/EAT. so about an hour after the Asians, is regarded as a second feeding of the night, legitimate culinary catmy mom voiced a craving egor y. It’s a sor t of raw for some instant ramen material, a blank canvas (dressed up for the holidays in if you will, and it rarely goes unkimchi, scrambled egg, and leftover tweaked. The standard add-on is asparagus). All of us unhesitatingly egg, scrambled and drizzled into agreed that a third meal was in orthe boiling broth—bang, protein. der. Apparently there is a separate Then it’s a matter of what’s in stomach for dessert for some, and the fridge, but chopped scallions, ramen for others. ■ frozen spinach, even deli meat or


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EATS & DRINKS ECLECTIC ROCKET TO VENUS Retro but not annoyingly so. Cool but not overbearingly so. Hampden has a new hangout with a smart menu—steak frites, veggie wimpies, and out-of-this world roasted Brussels sprouts. The food is good, too, and the rock-star wait staff has peripheral vision. All this, and a contender for the world’s neatest jukebox. 3360 Chestnut Ave., (410) 235-7887. ROY’S It’s a chain, it’s also expensive, and the staff bellows “ALOHA!” as you walk in. However, the food is very good, sometimes even extraordinary. Half the menu changes nightly, so recommendations are tricky, but classic Asian dishes tend to be very good while fusion either sinks or soars. 720B Aliceanna St., (410) 659-0099. SASCHA’S 527 Sascha’s is sexy, with the kind of understated dusky lighting that makes everyone look good, gothic black rose arrangements, and soaring 16-foot-high ceilings. The menu offers a variety of clever small plates—bison sliders, mini fish tacos—substantial entrees, and even larger salads. Live jazz takes place on Fridays from 8 to 10 P. M .; come early or later if conversation is the focus of your evening out. 527 N. Charles St., (410) 539-8880.

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32 | city paper

japanese restaurant

japanese restaurant

TAMBER’S Renovations and an expansion have transformed Tamber’s—it used to look like a 1950s diner, now a (nice) senior-residence dining room. The menu adds standard and decent Indian fare onto a traditional diner menu with surprisingly good results-awesome stuffed nan, a massive Reuben. Subdued, borderline depressing, and not a little weird, but a definite break from the chains of nearby Streuvertown. 3327 St. Paul St., (410) 243-5777.

F R E N C H / C O N T I N E N TA L BRASSERIE TATIN Picking up where Jeannier’s left off, the new restaurant in the Broadview Apartments amplifies the Francophilia, and the effort to create something resembling a real neighborhood brasserie (something more substantial than a bistro) is laudable—poached lobster, warm quail, and, naturally, escargots. Right now, too expensive and rarefied for neighborhood walk-in dining, too brusque for Saturday night on the town. 105 W. 39th St., (410) 889-3303. CHAMELEON CAFÉ Ambitious, reasonably priced eats start with charcuterie plate or oysters en brochette, either one a mini-meal. Press on to balsamic-glazed pork chop, grilled salmon on lentils, or free-range chicken. Marvel at the transformative power of the gravy. 4341 Harford Road, (410) 254-2376. CRÊPE DU JOUR Crêpe-heavy Mount Washington café has expanded its menu to encompass French staples like steak frites and poulet roti, with tres bon results. Higher-end dishes shine with complex sauces and herb flavorings. 1609 Sulgrave Ave., (410) 542-9000. PETIT LOUIS BISTRO Brunch at this Tony Foreman/ Cindy Wolf mainstay is civilized, much quieter than the dinner hours, but pretty expensive any way you slice it. For a wedding brunch or a graduation, it’s probably perfect. Breakfast additions to the regular menu include a knockout steak frites (with a single poached egg) and brioche-style French toast. A Gruyère omelet is far too prissy, Frenchy. Please, it’s brunch, we’ll work it off. 4800 Roland Ave., (410) 366-9393. ROOSTER CAFÉ Offering only four high-priced entrées promises a kind of perfection that doesn’t materialize. The concept, French technique applied to organic ingredients, is elusive in practice— minimalist flavors aren’t backed up by precision in presentation. 6590 Old Waterloo Road, Elkridge (443) 755-0600.

GERMAN harbor east :: 608 south exeter st. 410.752.9666

XS CAFÉ Come for the architecture—four floors of burnished modernity—and stay for the food, if it ever comes. Waits are long, but you can opt for salads, panini, omelets, gelati, or something from the menu of sushi and other Japanese standards that are usually worth the time. 1307 N. Charles St., (410) 468-0002.

EICHENKRANZ RESTAURANT Here are schnitzel and wurst for Haussner’s refugees, but also twists on international fare: spinach pies with sweet marinara, zucchini in tempura. Nightly specials are eyepopping full dinners at $7.50 or less. Apple strudel is surprisingly light. 611 S. Fagley St., (410) 563-7577.

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C H E A P E AT S POP TACOS 1065 S. CHARLES ST., (410) 605-0230 THE SIGN PROMISING CHICKEN ESCABECHE is what drew me in. Escabeche is a spicy vinegar-based marinade popular in Central and South American food, and a plate of tangy, spicy chicken served over steamed rice with a side of fresh veggies ($5.99) sounded like the perfect fix for a slushy, miserable afternoon. I ordered the dish, then on a whim asked for a cup of homemade cilantro noodle soup, made with jalapenos, tofu, and mushrooms ($3.89). The escabeche, unfortunately, was not what I’d expected—the marinade tasted sweet rather than spicy, more like a teriyaki sauce than anything else. Disappointing. The soup however, exceeded my expectation. A simple broth full of thick doughy noodles was the base, and into that the woman behind the counter tossed a handful of fresh, raw mushrooms, jalapenos, and cilantro. She added big cubes of fried tofu, sealed the to-go container, and on the trip to the car, the broth absorbed the spiciness of the jalapeno and the fresh, pungent flavor of the cilantro. The mushrooms, tofu, and noodles made it deceptively satisfying. Definitely worth stopping in again, though next time I’ll probably skip the escabeche. (ERIN SULLIVAN)

ERIN SULLIVAN

HAPPY HOUR


EATS & DRINKS

ROPEWALK

GREEK CYPRIANA CAFÉ A near-perfect downtown lunch spot with an extensive menu of traditional Greek food, including homemade soups, rotisserie chicken, entrée salads, and panini. The falafel pita is one of those rare phenomena—something perfect of its kind. 120 E. Baltimore St., (410) 837-7482.

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GREEK VILLAGE Alongside pastitsio and (first-rate) spanakopita, there’s ham and cabbage and some fine pastas, especially ravioli with meatballs. Try the chicken souvlaki. Rice pudding is outstanding. 7308 Eastern Ave., (410) 282-1700.

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IKAROS Greektown’s Old Faithful still packs ’em in. Trendy dishes may miss, but the basics—Greek salad, stuffed grape leaves, tender braised lamb, moussaka—can’t go wrong. Add perfectly ovenroasted potatoes, but save room for baklava. 4805 Eastern Ave., (410) 633-3750. MYLOS Home-cooking, Greek-style, performed almost entirely by Popi Giorgakis, a veteran of the area’s Greek diners. Keep your attention on the daily specials—simmering and hearty dishes like keftedakia (Greek meatballs), beef with orzo, stuffed peppers. Appetizers like taramasalata (a red-roe caviar dip) and glumpy saganaki (flaming cheeses) taste great on dense homemade bread. Corner-bar atmosphere doesn’t detract at all from the kitchen’s personal touches. 4619 Eastern Ave., [410] 342-7753). SAMOS Spaciously renovated, this Greektown gem has held on to low prices and quality. Highlights include pies (spinach, cheese, and shrimp), powerful melitzanosalata (eggplant dip), garlic-spiked leg of lamb, and the groaning pekilia platter. 600 S. Oldham St., (410) 675-5292. ZORBA’S A big part of the Zorba’s experience is watching spits laden with chicken, lamb, and pork revolve over hot coals. The kitchen is a bit hitCONTINUED ON PAGE 34

RECENTLY IN FREE RANGE CAFÉ GIA RISTORANTE A happy vibe and hearty Sicilian food without the fustiness (or prices) of most Little Italy restaurants. Nearly everything is made in-house, including traditional desserts like cannoli and tiramisu. Ravioli positano utilizes dried rigatoni with fine results; if homemade gnocchi is on the menu, try it. BYOB with a $5 corkage fee. 410 S. High St., (410) 685-6727 PARKSIDE RESTAURANT, FINE FOOD, AND SPIRITS Not just a bar/restaurant, the Parkside also hosts a bakery and a market under its roof, which may be why the space and the food seem unfocused. Homey, comfort food is the order of the day here, and the bar boasts a well-chosen beer selection. There’s also a play area for youngsters. 4709 Harford Road, (410) 444-6004. TAPABAR This Little Italy restaurant offers a traditional tapas menu, but diners need to choose carefully. Avoid grilled meats, which have a tendency to be overcooked, in favor of papas rellenas, hearty alubias blancas soup, and the sweet and savory epinaca salteadas. Slow service forces lingering. 413 S. High St., (410) 223-3020.

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EATS & DRINKS and-miss: the taramosalata and moussaka lack spicy bite, but the kontosouvli (grilled marinated pork) is delicious and plentiful. Stick with the pit. 4710 Eastern Ave., (410) 276-4484.

INDIAN

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34 | city paper

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

1/2 OFF FOOD & BOOZE IF IN YOUR PJ’s

TUE 2/24 MARDI GRAS PARTY

• PRIVATE PARTY ROOMS AVAILABLE • citypaper.com

BANJARA Sedate Federal Hill Indian restaurant has over the years accrued some tattered colonial charm. The spicing and sauces are decidedly more modulated, more subtle than at other area Indian joints—if subtlety is what you’re after. The menu is peppered with sophisticated fare—crab malamar, lobster saag, lamb mango. The great middle ground of standard fare is just a little dull. 1017 S. Charles St., (410) 962-1554. CAFÉ SPICE Casual, family-run Indian joint moves into the old Purim Oak space across from the Towson Library. Everyone must begin with the gobi manchuri, batter-fried cauliflower in a tongue-tingling garlic sauce, and move from there into solid, aromatic, generously portioned home-cooking. Ask to see both menus, because two exist, one more thorough than the other. 321 York Road, Towson, (410) 583-7770. INDIA RASOI Ditch the usual fare in surrounding Little Italy for dense mulligatawny soup, samosas, and stuffed bread, followed by rogan josh, a fiery vindaloo, or a sweet biryani. Or get lighter vegetable dishes, such as bengan bartha or chickpea-onion bindi pyaaz. 411 S. High St., (410) 385-4900. INDIA TANDOOR This very decent Indian restaurant features a daily buffet that attracts a regular crowd of artists and nearby workers, and the food turned out by the small kitchen during the evening is well seasoned and satisfying. 2101 N. Charles St., (410) 468-0969.

SAT/SUN

$10 PITCHERS OF BLOODIES AND MIMOSAS

AMBASSADOR DINING ROOM At least in summer, spring, and fall, everyone wants to sit out on the patio, that beautiful fragrant patio with its gurgling fountains and near-formal table settings and service. Romantic, yes? The interior space has some dowager charm, too, but feels second rate. The platings of Indian food are prettier than the norm, maybe executions are a little lighter, but it all comes at a premium. 3811 Canterbury Road, (410) 366-1484.

1/2 PRICE SELECT BOTTLES EVERY TUESDAY & FRIDAY Received “Award of Excellence” for wine list -Wine Specator

$8.95 & $9.95 VALET PARKING & PARTY ROOMS AVAILABLE (SEATING UP TO 80) 223 S HIGH ST 410.547•0820

www.caesarsden.com

INDIGMA When it works, as with grilled lamb or a cauliflower soup with ginger and crispy fried shallots, the whole elegant Indian experience makes sense, a midtown alternative to the Ambassador, and the place is truly pretty. Meal-timing is problematic, and enough dishes just sit there—you wonder, has something been forgotten, left out? 802 N. Charles St., (410) 605-1212. LUMBINI Serene, maybe even a little somber, this new Indian/Nepalese joint feels a bit fussy. But the northern Indian food is just fine, and a few of the Nepalese dishes, especially the chicken momo (big, fluffy dumplings) and the sukait, a cured lamb appetizer, are fascinating and delicious. However, you have to almost plead for the Nepalese dishes—Lumbini is shy about them, as if it assumes you won’t like them. 322 N. Charles St., (410) 244-5556. EATS & DRINKS LISTS RESTAURANTS PREVIOUSLY REVIEWED BY CITY PAPER.


Check out our new look! NEW After 9pm Late Night Menu starting at $3.99 every night

Check out our

NEW BAR, NEW DECOR & 7 NEW FLAT SCREEN TVs Enjoy $3 Monster domestic drafts & a special menu starting at $3.99 during all televised basketball & hockey games. 10 Beers on tap.

Towson Catonsville - Route 40 - (410) 788-2627

8610 LaSalle Road- (410) 296-7077

January 12th - February 17th come in to check us out and enter to win a $500 GAS Gift Card No purchase necessary. Contest open to U.S. residents 21 years of age or older. Offer only available at the Applebee’s inTowson or Catonsville, MD. See store for details. Entries must be received by midnight Feb. 17th, 2009. The Rose Group isnot responsible for any lost, late or damaged entries. Entries become the property of The Rose Group and will not be returned.One entry per household per day. One winner will be selected from all submitted entries. Odds are dependent upon number of entries received. All Applebee’s associates and their families are not eligible to win.

S U L U M I T S C I M O CE ON CKAGE PA 40% OFF ALL DRINKS • ALL OF THE TIME ALL OF FEBRUARY

27 E Cross St • FEDERAL HILL • TUE-SAT 5pm-1am crazylils.com • 410.347.9793

Get Happy. Happy Hour U Mon.– Sat. U 3pm to 7pm

“Best Bento Box” and “Best Happy Hour” by Baltimore magazine citypaper.com

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

city paper | 35


BALTIMORE WEEKLY HIGHLIGHTS

FEB. 4 THROUGH FEB. 11

IN THE WEEKLY: CLUBS/CONCERTS 40 CLASSICAL 44 DANCE & DANCING 45 GAY & LESBIAN 47 STAGE 47 COMEDY 50 ART 50 WORDS 52 BENEFITS 52 COMMUNITY ACTION 52 SPECIAL EVENTS 52 TALKS PLUS 52 BUSINESS 54 SCREENS 54 KIDS 54 HEALTH & FITNESS 55 SPORTS & RECREATION 55 FILM 56 Not HIGH enough? See NOW HEAR THIS throughout the Baltimore Weekly calendar. We’d be glad to list your event in the Baltimore Weekly calendar. Send information in writing at least three weeks in advance to B a l t i m o r e W e e k l y, c /o City Paper, 812 Park Ave., Baltimore, MD 21201, or fax it to (410) 523-8437, or e-mail it to calendar@citypaper.com. We dig on images but cannot return them. All listings are subject to space limitations.

36 | city paper

WEDNESDAY 4

DISNEY ON ICE: A DISNEYLAND ADVENTURE Through Feb. 8, 7:30 P.M. Wednesday and Thursday, 10:30 A.M. and 7:30 P.M. Friday, 11 A.M. , 2:30 and 6:30 P.M. Saturday, noon and 4 P.M. Sunday, 1st Mariner Arena, 201 W. Baltimore St., (410) 347-2020, baltimorearena.com, $14-$55. If you were a kid growing up in Southern California in the early ’70s, you may have visions of Disneyland’s spinning teacups and internationally costumed little automated kids singing, “It’s a Small World” every time someone mentions Disney World—which is a totally different, and way larger, theme park. So imagine our surprise to find that this latest series of Disney on Ice performances have the Incredibles family skating a vacation through the Haunted Mansion, Pirates of the Caribbean, and Space Mountain attractions from the original fantasy land of our youth. We’re going and wearing our ears from 1974. (WW)

THURSDAY 5 FEB. 5-8

CIRQUE DE LA SYMPHONIE 8 P.M. Thursday, Music Center at Stathmore, 5301 Tuckerman Lane, North Bethesda, 8 P.M. Friday-Saturday, and 3 P.M. Sunday, Family Concert Series: Classically Kids 11 A.M. Saturday, Meyerhoff Symphony Hall, 1212 Cathedral St., (410) 783-8000, BSOmusic.org, $35-$85, kids concert $12-$20. The circus is coming! The circus is coming! Actually, the crazy Cirque du Soleil doesn’t pop its tent in Baltimore until March 12 (through April 5) and the old-school Ringling Bros. and Barnum and Bailey Circus isn’t leading the elephants into Charm City until March 25 (again, weirdly, through April 5). The Baltimore Symphony is Big Top-blocking them both this weekend by performing with the Cirque de la Symphonie’s contortionists, aerialists, strongmen, and more in a program of Wagner, Saint-Saens, and Mussorgsky conducted by BSO Pops conductor Jack Everly. The kids show on Saturday morning, for ages 7 and up, is a no-brainer, plus, the BSO only offers fun for the little ones a few times a year. (Wendy Ward)

IGNITE BALTIMORE #2 6 P.M., the Windup Space, 12 W. North Ave., (410) 244-8855, thewindupspace.com, ignite baltimore.com, free. Sixteen people each take five minutes (and 20 presentation slides) to talk, preach, instigate, inspire, self-aggrandize, infuriate, and possibly amuse. Tonight’s lineup includes Baltimore City Councilman Bill Henry, musician Caleb Stine, media tech guy Mario Armstrong, “writer, strategist, and design and culture enthusiast” Neal Shaffer, and Heather Kirk-Davidoff, who will do five minutes entitled “Five Ways to Really Choose Civility.” This event is officially sold out, but organizers say there’s a good chance not everyone who has RSVP’d will show, so there might be a way in for those who arrive around 6 P.M. and get on the waiting list. (Joe MacPowerpoint)

SKI FOR FREE!

AT SEVEN SPRINGS

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

citypaper.com

Disney on Ice: A Disneyland Adve


FRIDAY 6

SUNDAY 8

LOS SOLOS: SUSAN ALCORN, CLYDE FORTH

TAKE BACK WYPR FORUM AND DISCUSSION WITH MARC STEINER

8:30 P.M., Carriage House, 2225 Hargrove St. between St. Paul and North Calvert streets, baltimoreperformance.com/ lossolos, $6 suggested donation. The indispensable monthly Los Solos performance series continues tonight with two artists on the verge. Susan Alcorn is no stranger to habitués of the Red Room, and the frequency of her genre-blurring solo pedal-steel performances is one of the more encouraging trends in Baltimore over the past 12 months. Speaking of blurring genres, we hesitate to try to encapsulate what artist/dancer/ performer/what-have-you clyde forth might be up to this evening, but she should more than hold up her end. (Lee Gardner)

SATURDAY 7

IMAGINE OUR ANCESTORS: CHILDREN HEROES OF THE CIVIL RIGHTS MOVEMENT 3-4 P.M., Reginald F. Lewis Museum of Maryland African American History and Culture, 830 E. Pratt St., (443) 263-1800, africanamericanculture.org, $8, seniors and students $6, children 6 and under free. Baltimore’s premiere destination for African-American history and culture kicks off its Saturday children’s series programs with this performance and interactive activity. First, traveling troupe Imagine Our Ancestors tells stories of Linda Brown (as in, Brown vs. Board of Education), Ruby Bridges (the 6-year-old titan who became the first African-American to attend an all-white school in New Orleans in 1960), and Elizabeth Eckford (one of the fearless Little Rock Nine). And after the performance, children are invited to make booklets about the Civil Rights era. Represent. (Bret McCabe)

enture

M O U N T A I N

R E S O R T

6 P.M., 2640 Space, 2640 St. Paul St., redemmas.org/2640, free, but donations welcome. Take back the public airwaves, or at least attend a meeting where Baltimoreans talk about why and how to do such a thing. The organizers of local agit-group Take Back WYPR continue not to take very well at all last year’s firing of Marc Steiner, a long-time host and fixture at the NPR affiliate, and tonight they invite interested community members to a confab with Steiner himself on where the matter stands. (LG)

MONDAY 9

OSTRICHES AND SILENT FLOWERS: JAPANESE PAINTINGS BY KOTARO FUKUI Through March 14, 11 A.M.-4 P.M. Mondays-Fridays, 1-4 P.M. Saturdays, Asian Arts Gallery, Center for the Arts, Towson University, 8000 York Road., (410) 704 2807, towson.edu/ asianarts, free. Kotaro Fukui’s paintings of ostriches anchor this exhibit. The ostrich, that ungainly creature with a vaguely puffy body and long spindly limbs, is rendered here with a certain elegance. Almost every piece seems to focus on the arch of the neck, with the contours of the ostrich starkly contrasted against a bleak background. The other featured series of work, the “Silent Flowers,” once again displays Fukui’s fascination with flowing lines, but adds colors, or more specifically a color, a splendid, strangely iridescent blue. (Zachary Evans)

TUESDAY 10

“31 DAYS OF OSCAR” Turner Classic Movies, tcm.com. February always brings Turner Classic Movies’ “31 Days of

Oscar” film series, during which the basic-cable channel honors previous Oscar winners and nominees with a round-the-clock film series organized in short thematic blocks. Today offers two literate treats for anglophile cineastes. During the day, “Shakespeare’s Tragedies” bundles George Cukor’s 1936 Romeo and Juliet, starring Norma Shearer and Leslie Howard, with Laurence Olivier’s 1944 Henry V and 1955 Richard III. Later that evening, TCM follows Shakespeare with “20th Century British Writers,” starting out with Jack Clayton’s 1959 adaptation of John Braine’s novel Room at the Top and continuing with Mike Newell’s 1992 Enchanted April, Ronald Neame’s 1960 treatment of James Kennaway’s Tunes of Glory, and at 2 A.M., Carol Reed’s near perfect adaptation of a Graham Greene short story, 1948’s The Fallen Idol. (BM)

WEDNESDAY 11

THE TRAIL OF DREAMS WORLD PEACE WALK Noon, walk from Coppin State University to the National Great Blacks In Wax Museum, (443) 739-2344, trailofdreams worldpeacewalk.com, free. Today, we often hear about babies getting killed in the middle of a war or people being treated badly because of their origins or religion. It seems like almost no one is satisfied without hating or hurting others. However, there are people who care enough about peace in the world that they are promoting it in 17 countries thus far. The Trail of Dreams World Peace Walk arrives in our city this afternoon and begins a four-day series of events including a ceremony, forum, and film—all peace-related. This is a chance to learn how to be a peace keeper from those who are living the dream. (Awis Mranani) ■

WIN A

WINTER GIVEAWAY

FEB. 5

THE CHOCOLATE AFFAIR Finally work off the little extra jelly you’ve been jiggling since late November? Nothing like a benefit for one of our favorite local organizations, Health Care for the Homeless, to make us realize how blessed it is to have a family, home, and cornucopia of good eating on our table during the holidays. Do your part for our neighbors that live on the street by investing in a night of sweet and savory eats and drinks; music by a steel drum band, DJ, and jazz pianist; silent and live auctions; mini-spa treatments; martini demos; and strolling magic makers. Wondering if chocolate is the way to Baltimore’s wallets? The Chocolate Affair raised $125,000 last year. 6-9:30 P.M., M&T Bank Stadium, south lounge level, 1101 Russell St., (443) 703-1396, chocolateaffair.org, $85, $75 advance, $140 couples in advance, $150 Chocolate Angel with VIP pre-event reception at 5:30 P.M. (WW)

FEB. 7

RADIO ONE BLOOD DRIVE. Radio One and the American Red Cross are making it easy to donate blood and help save lives—just call or hit the web site to make an appointment. 10 A.M.-4 P.M., Frederick Douglass High School, 2301 Gwynns Falls Parkway, Skateworks Inc., 1716 White Head Road, Gwynn Oak, (800) 448-3543, my-redcross.org, free. (WW)

JD’S SMOKEHOUSE

3000 O’DONNELL ST

THURSDAY, FEB. 5TH • 9:30-11:30PM 410.675.4029 citypaper.com

CANTON SQUARE BALTIMORE

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

city paper | 37


HON BAR 1000 W. 36TH ST., (410) 243-1230, CAFEHON.COM DESPITE THE KITSCH-FEST AT THE RESTAURANT NEXT DOOR at Café Hon (and its own over the top window displays), the Hon Bar has a distinct air of respectability. The décor of tastefully faux-finished walls, deco-ish light fixtures, and a copper-topped wood bar screams adult and so does the clientele. Everyone there seems to be a professional, or at least a grad student, or a professional grad student. On the recent Thursday night we stepped into the Hampden corner bar, live jazz added to the mature atmosphere—though the jazz was a bit loud for the small space. We were pleasantly surprised to see Brewer’s Art’s Resurrection on tap. We ordered two. Each one cost $5 rather than the $4.50 Brewer’s charges, but the Hon Bar serves its Resurrections in a frosted pint glass instead of a goblet, which probably provides more than 50 cents worth of additional beer. The Hon Bar may not be a see-and-be-seen kind of place, but it is a relaxed yet refined spot for a drink and good conversation with a friend. And unless you venture to the restaurant next door, there is nary a fake-hon or dayglo beehive in sight. (Anna Ditkoff)

VENUES ANGELS ROCK BAR, 10 Market Place, (410) 528-1999, angelsrockbarbaltimore.com THE BARN, 9527 Harford Road, Carney, (410) 882-6182, thebarnmd.com BIRCHMERE, 3701 Mount Vernon Ave., Alexandria, Va., (703) 549-7500, birchmere.com BLACK CAT, 1811 14th St. NW, Washington, (202) 667-7960, blackcatdc.com THE BLACK HOLE, 216 German Hill Road, (410) 285-7625, blackholerockclub.com CAT’S EYE PUB, 1730 Thames St., (410) 276-9866, catseyepub.com CHARM CITY ART SPACE, 1729 Maryland Ave., ccspace.org CHEESEBURGER IN PARADISE, 8026 Ritchie Highway, suite B, Pasadena, (410) 7611003, cheeseburgerinparadise.com/destinations/pasadena.asp THE CLADDAGH PUB, 2918 O’Donnell St., (410) 522-4220, claddaghonline.com CLUB ONE, 300 E. Saratoga St., (410) 2300049, onebaltimore.com CLUB ORPHEUS, 1003 E. Pratt St., (410) 276-5599 CLUB 347, 347 N. Calvert St., (410) 5470414, club347.com THE DEPOT, 1728 N. Charles St., (410) 528-0174, thedepot.us EDEN’S LOUNGE, 15 W. Eager St., (410) 244-0405, edenslounge.com THE 8X10, 10 E. Cross St., (410) 625-2000, the8x10.com EXPLORER’S LOUNGE, Intercontinental Harbor Court Hotel, 550 Light St., (410) 234-0550, harborcourt.com/restaurants/explorers_ lounge.cfm FISH HEAD CANTINA, 4802 Benson Ave., Arbutus, (410) 247-2474, fishheadcantina. com FLETCHER’S, 701 S. Bond St., (410) 5581889, fletchersbar.com 49 WEST, 49 West St., Annapolis, (410) 626-9796, 49westcoffeehouse.com FRAZIER’S ON THE AVENUE, 919 W. 36th St., (410) 662-4914, fraziersontheavenue. com GOLDEN WEST CAFÉ, 1105 W. 36th St., (410) 889-8891, goldenwest.com

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

citypaper.com

GOOD LOVE BAR, 2322 Boston St., (410) 534-4588 GRAND CENTRAL, 1001/1003 N. Charles St., (410) 752-7133, centralstationpub.com HIPPO, 1 W. Eager St., (410) 547-0069, clubhippo.com HORSE YOU CAME IN ON, 1626 Thames St., (410) 327-8111 HOWL AT THE MOON, 22 Market Place, (410) 783-5111, howlatthemoon.com/baltimore_tonight.html JAMES JOYCE IRISH PUB AND RESTAURANT, 616 S. President St., (410) 727-5107, thejamesjoycepub.com JAXX, 6355 Rolling Road, West Springfield, 703-569-5940, jaxxroxx.com JAY’S ON READ, 225 W. Read St., (410) 225-0188, jaysonread.biz/ JOE SQUARED, 133 W. North Ave., (410) 545-0444, joesquared.com JUDGE’S BENCH PUB, 8385 Main St., Ellicott City, (410) 465-3497, mdparty.com/venues/ default.asp?c=3264 LA PALAPA GRILL AND CANTINA, 8307 Main St., Ellicott City, (410) 465-0070, lapalapagrill.com LATIN PALACE, 509 S. Broadway St., (410) 522-6700, latinpalace.com LOONEY’S PUB NORTH, 312 N. Main St., Bel Air, (410) 803-7080, looneyspubmd. com MICK O’SHEA’S, 328 N. Charles St., (410) 539-7504, mickosheas.com MOSAIC LOUNGE, 4 Market Place, (410) 262-8713, mosaic-lounge.com NEW HAVEN LOUNGE, 1552 Havenwood Road, Northwood Shopping Center, (410) 366-7416, newhavenlounge.net 9:30 CLUB, 815 V St. NW, Washington, (202) 265-0930, 930.com THE OTTOBAR, 2549 N. Howard St., (410) 662-0069, theottobar.com PALMA NIGHTCLUB, 200 E. Redwood St., (410) 244-1008, palmabaltimore.com PAUL’S BAR, 701 E. Fort Ave., (443) 3262060 PHILLIPS HARBORPLACE, 301 Light St., (410) 685-6600, phillipsseafood.com PIONEER PUB, 17417 York Road, Hereford, (410) 357-4231, mdparty.com/venues/ default.asp?c=6467 RAMS HEAD LIVE, 20 Market Place, (410) 244-1131, ramsheadlive.com

ANNA DIT KO FF

38 | city paper

DRINKS

R A M S H E A D TAV E R N , 3 3 W e s t S t . , Annapolis, (410) 268-4545, ramsheadtavern.com RECHER THEATRE, 512 York Road, Towson, (410) 337-7178, rechertheatre.com THE RED HOUSE TAVERN, 2239 Essex St., (410) 522-3220, myspace.com/redhousetavern RED MAPLE, 930 N. Charles St., (410) 5470149, 930redmaple.com REDHOUSE TAVERN, 2239 Essex St., Canton, myspace.com/redhousetavern ROCK AND ROLL HOTEL, 1353 H St. NE, Washington, (202) 388-7625, rockandrollhoteldc.com RUSH HOUR SPORTS BAR AND GRILL, 9820 Liberty Road, Randallstown, (410) 5214050 RYAN’S DAUGHTER, 600 E. Belvedere Ave., Belvedere Square, (410) 464-1000, rdirishpub.com SHORTY’S MARTINI BAR AND LOUNGE, 3301 Foster Ave., (410) 327-8696, shortysbaltimore.com SIDEBAR, 218 E. Lexington St., (410) 6594130, sidebartavern.com SILVER SHADOWS CLUB, 5550 Sterrett Place, Columbia, (410) 730-0111 SISTA’S PLACE, 8521 Liberty Road, Randallstown, (410) 922-9218 SMASH DADDY’S, 9654 Belair Road, Perry Hall, (410) 529-1544, myspace.com/ smashdaddysbar SONAR, 407 E. Saratoga St., (410) 7837888, sonarbaltimore.com SONOMA’S BAR AND GRILLE, 7284 Cradlerock Way, Columbia, (410) 381-7220, sonomasbar.com SYDONNE’S EVENT HALL, 713 N. Howard St., (410) 728-1184 TALKING HEAD, 407 E. Saratoga St., (410) 207-8011, talkingheadclub.com TYSON’S TAVERN, 2112 Fleet St., (410) 342-2112, tysonstavern.net WATERFRONT HOTEL, 1710 Thames St., (410) 537-5055, waterfronthotel.us THE WINDUP SPACE, 10-12 W. North Ave., (410) 244-8855, thewindupspace.com


citypaper.com

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

city paper | 39


BALTIMORE WEEKLY ĂŠ- "7-ĂŠ ĂŠ -t UNLESS NOTED

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WEDNESDAY 4

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ANGELS ROCK BAR. L-80’s Night. BIRCHMERE. Three Girls and Their Buddy. BLACK CAT. Brookville, E Joseph and the Phantom Heart. CAT’S EYE PUB. Muleman Band. THE CLADDAGH PUB. Name This Tune. CLUB ONE. Salsa Uno with guest DJs. EDEN’S LOUNGE. Singles Night with DJ Tanz. CLUB 347. The Panama Band. THE 8X10. Jerry Joseph, Ms. Sara and the Help. EXPLORER’S LOUNGE. Dick Smith. 49 WEST. Starr’s Jazz Jam. GOLDEN WEST CAFÉ. The Visitations, Lands and People, Old Tender Heart. JA XX. Rose Funeral featuring Burnie Memass, Conducting from the Grave, the Breathing Proceoa. JAY’S ON READ. Larry Buck. 9:30 CLUB. WZMQ presents Little Bigtown, Zac Brown Band. RAMS HEAD LIVE. The Black Keys. RED MAPLE. Oasis. ROCK AND ROLL HOTEL. Not Dead Yet, he Rebirth with DJ Derek Keane. RUSH HOUR SPORTS BAR AND GRILL. Ladies Night with DJ Spontaneous. SILVER SHADOWS CLUB. Open mic. TALKING HEAD. Dreadful Yawns, We Read Minds. TYSON’S TAVERN. Song Writers Night hosted by Ken Gutberlet. WATERFRONT HOTEL. Eric Scott.

THURSDAY 5

MONDAY:

Try The Wine!

FOOLS & HORSES Acoustic Show Every Monday Night

we have over 35 btls

Acoustic Open Mic $8 All-You-Can-Drink Natty Boh & $1 Tacos

oand 1/2 price btl specials on monday

TUESDAY:

WEDNESDAY:

ELECTRIC OPEN JAM THE BOOZE HOUNDS

WITH

$5 Bombs

THURSDAY:

dinner specials nightly

DRUNKEN TRIVIA $50 Top Prize | $9 Bucket of Bud & Bud Lt. FRIDAY:

LIVE MUSIC SATURDAY:

3 for $3 8oz drafts m-f 5-7pm osunday 11-1am sunday night movie @ 9pm 3360 chestnut ave * baltimore, md 21211

www.rockettovenus.com

40 | city paper

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

LIVE MUSIC SUNDAY:

Industry Night 50% off for industry workers $10 All-U-Can-Drink Happy Hour EVERY FRIDAY 6-9PM w/ The Rev. Jack Starr Band

2239 Essex St. | Canton, 410.522.3220

myspace.com/redhousetavern citypaper.com

NOW HEAR THIS

ANGELS ROCK BAR. Mayhem with DJs Supernik and Sean of the Dead, OurAfter. THE BARN. Oh Yeah Sure. BLACK CAT. The Andalusians, Statehood, Played Tomorrow. CAT’S EYE PUB. Pete Kanares Blues Band. THE CLADDAGH PUB. DJ John Anthony. CLUB ORPHEUS. Glow Factor with DJ Warring, Umbris, and guests. THE 8X10. Jazz Fuzion Night with Break the Blueline, Dirk Quinn Band, the Nerftones. EXPLORER’S LOUNGE. Dick Smith. FLETCHER’S. The Search for the Next Great Metal Band, week 1 featuring Beneath the Sovereign, My Darling, Betrayer, Death of a Thane, Regardless, He’s Caught. HIPPO. DJ Kuhmeleon. HORSE YOU CAME IN ON. Angelique Henle. JAMES JOYCE IRISH PUB AND RESTAURANT. Angelique Henle. JOE SQUARED. Sac Au Lait. LA PALAPA GRILL AND CANTINA. Latin Night with DJ Earl. LATIN PALACE. DC Latin Sound Band. LEPEARL BALLROOM. Networking and Karaoke Thursdays. LOONEY’S PUB NORTH. DJ Yummy. MICK O’SHEA’S. Marc Evans. MOSAIC LOUNGE. DJ Xclusive. 9:30 CLUB. James Morrison, Erin McCarley. THE OTTOBAR. Lucero, Down Goes Frazier. PALMA NIGHTCLUB. DJ Chris Styles. RAMS HEAD TAVERN. Over the Rhine. RED MAPLE. Sol y Luna. RED MAPLE. Moog with DJ Patrick Turner, N’Dinga, Soulminer, and Brandon Riggs.

DILLINGER ESCAPE PLAN, DUB TRIO FEB. 6 Some bands base their entire existence on screwing around with genre, mostly for the worse, but often for better. And why not throw some of them—the good ones—on the same tour together? Dillinger Escape Plan (pictured) is already well known and loved in punk, metal, and forward-thinking indie-rock communities for knotty hybrids of prog, free-jazz, hardcore, and rock. Dub Trio, less known as a whole unit than as big name backing players, do wicked interesting things with dub as it relates to metal and artrock, not so much fusing them as working with the bare elemental DNA of all styles involved. The result is a peculiar, otherworldly jive between the heavy and ethereal. 8 P.M., the Ottobar, 2549 N. Howard St., (410) 662-0069, theottobar. com, $15. (Michael Byrne)

ROCK AND ROLL HOTEL. Millionaires, Cash Cash, I Set My Friends on Fire, Watchout! There’s Ghosts. RYAN’S DAUGHTER. Uncle Dave. SHORTY ’S MARTINI BAR AND LOUNGE. Breakout. SONAR. Gallagher. TALKING HEAD. Larkin Grimm, Crazy Dreams Band. WATERFRONT HOTEL. Loose Caboose.

FRIDAY 6 BALTIMORE’S TREMONTS. Jazz night. THE BARN. Broadcast. BLACK CAT. DJ Steve EP, Missguided, Killa K, Krasty McNasty. THE CELLAR STAGE. The Tannahill Weavers. CHEESEBURGER IN PARADISE. Drop Dead Wasted. THE CLADDAGH PUB. DJ John Anthony. CLUB ORPHEUS. Ascension with DJs Kele-De, Steven


BALTIMORE WEEKLY Archer, Neska, and Liebchen. CLUB 347. DJ Biskit. EDEN’S LOUNGE. Flavor Fridays with DJ Titan. THE 8X10. Pasadena, Bojibian, Sonic Bloom. EXPLORER’S LOUNGE. Brent Hardesty. FISH HEAD CANTINA. Never Never. FLETCHER’S. Warning Party. GOOD LOVE BAR. Pure. HIPPO. Hippo Cabaret. JAMES JOYCE IRISH PUB AND RESTAURANT. Ed and Frank. JAY’S ON READ. Dave Kessler, Dick Smith. L O O N E Y ’ S P U B N O R T H . C r u s h i n g D ay, Relicoustic. METRO GALLERY. Baltimore String Felons, Starling Electric, Tommy McGee, TGBRS. MICK O’SHEA’S. Smooth Kentucky. NEW HAVEN LOUNGE. Old Man Brown. 9:30 CLUB. Big Head Todd and the Monsters, Joan Jones. THE OTTOBAR. The Dillinger Escape Plan, Dub Trio, Knife the Glitter. PALMA NIGHTCLUB. DJ Soulstar. PHILLIPS HARBORPLACE. Randy Lotz. RAMS HEAD TAVERN. Wavman Tisdale. RECHER THEATRE. Beretta Jane, Loving the Lie, Outreach, When Gotham Falls. RED MAPLE. Rhythm! with DJ Alex Funk. ROCK AND ROLL HOTEL. Disco City, Caverns, Deleted Scenes, Hammer No More, Fingers, Acedia. RYAN’S DAUGHTER. Children of A Vivid Eden. SHORTY’S MARTINI BAR AND LOUNGE. RADAR. SIDEBAR. Miseuphoria. SONAR. Playground Etiquette CD release with Cubbiebear, Play Pause Repeat, Blind Rhetoric, the Escape Artist,. TALKING HEAD. Larkin Grimm, Dysrhythmia, Tombs, the Wayward, Rosetta, Isthmus. TEAVOLVE HARBOR EAST. First Fridays Nappy Hour. WATERFRONT HOTEL. Will Hill Band. THE WINDUP SPACE. Served! Dance Party.

CONCERTS LOS SOLOS: SUSAN ALCORN AND CLYDE FORTH. 8:30 P.M., the Carriage House, 2225 Hargrove St., (410) 858-3494, $6 suggested donation. WARREN WOLF SEXTET. With Warren Wolf, Erik Privert, Tim Green, Jason Palmer, and Todd Marcus. 8 and 9:30 P.M., An die Musik, 409 N. Charles St., (410) 385-2638, andiemusik.com, $13.

SATURDAY 7 BALTIMORE’S TREMONTS. Jazz night. THE BARN. Tripwire. BIRCHMERE. Walter Beasley. BLACK CAT. Shortstack, These United States, the Minor White, WAG. THE BL ACK HOLE. EDM Show hosted by Ian Beveridge. CHARM CITY ART SPACE. Drugs of Faith, Chainsaw to the Face, Napalm Death, Johnstomper aka Ben Is the Bastard, HelloKittyMotherFuckers, Repulsing Terror, Pumpkin Patchwork. CHEESEBURGER IN PARADISE. Brandt Dunn. THE CLADDAGH PUB. DJ John Anthony. CLUB ONE. Live Life Love. CLUB ORPHEUS. Rapture with host K and DJs Xy, Threshold, and VJ Umbris. EDEN’S LOUNGE. Chic Saturdays. THE 8X10. 3 Fifths, Gypsy Dawg. EXPLORER’S LOUNGE. Brent Hardesty and David Smith. FISH HEAD CANTINA. Deadlock. FLETCHER’S. Cold-Cold Heartbreakers.

THE SHORT LIST BY MICHAEL BYRNE

WEDNESDAY: The Visitations, an Elephant Six collective quirkpop outfit descended from the band Fablefactory, stops off at the Golden West with Old Tender Heart and Lands and People. Much fawned over blues-rock duo the Black Keys play Rams Head Live with Patrick Sweany. The Dreadful Yawns—a Cleveland outfit that makes endearingly dusty, bounce-along pop—opens wide at the Talking Head with We Read Minds.

with Tombs, the Wayward, Isthmus, and Rosetta. Pasadena, a band whose horrorshow of a MySpace page crashed our browser, brings its presumed Sublime-influenced alternacore to the 8X10 with Bojibian and Sonic Bloom. Sex Robots, a hooky megapop-punk band out of St. Louis, plays the Sidebar with Dead Mechanical, Active Sac, Head Home, and No Revolution. Baltimore jazz percussionist Warren Wolfe heads up a six-piece band at An die Musik for two evening shows.

SATURDAY: Charm City Art Space remains an oasis of brutality with a long list of unfettered audio aggression, including grinder Drugs of Faith, “powerviolence” outfit Chainsaw

Jet Set, Thee Lexington Arrows, the Mandroids, and several others. The Makanda Project, a Boston ensemble formed to cover the late composer Makanda Ken McIntyre, is joined by local sax man Carl Grubbs at An die Musik.

SUNDAY: A whole bunch of metal/ rock variants gather at the Ottobar for an early 4:30 P.M. show, including Octaves, Age Sixteen, Maddison, the Kindness of Strangers, Pianos Becomes the Teeth, Alramed, Oedipus, Blast the Stereo, This Message, and Death of a Thane. The jazz-funk trio of Julian Coryell, Karma Auger, and Nick Sample plays An die Musik. Broadcast Live, a political rap-rock outfit in the Rage Against the Machine vein, performs at the Windup Space with Son of Nun, Ryan Harvey, Rebel Inc., and Gray. MONDAY: Shat—a comedic metal outfit out of New Jersey whose songs include “Vagetarian,” “Any Cunt You Can Fuck I Can Fuck Better,” and the classic “Eating a Girl Out Is the Most Brilliant Thing”—heads up the Ottobar’s Metal Monday along with Ruin and Copstabber. German hardcore/punk outfit Doping the Void stops off at the Sidebar with Rebel Inc. TUESDAY: A l o c a l c a d r e o f

DYSRHYTHMIA THURSDAY: Cult favorite Lucero brings its Southern-fried alternacountry to the Ottobar with Down Goes Frazier. The many angel voices of Larkin Grimm make the Talking Head a very blissy place to be; avant/improv supergroup Crazy Dreams Band and WZT Hearts descendent Vows open.

FRIDAY: The Baltimore String Felons, an amorphous ensemble of local fiddlers, guitarists, and anything else strung, brings its folk interpretations to Metro Gallery with Starling Electric, Tommy McGee, and TGBRS. The Love Peace Project—and megapostive Afrobeat/hip-hop fusion outfit—spreads the good vibes at the Hexagon with Jefferson Forklift and Coaching the Ghost. Knotty, metal genre mash Dillinger Escape Plan performs at the Ottobar with Dub Trio, a bizarre and very worthwhile metal-dub smear, and Knife the Glitter. In what sounds like an absolutely horrifying show, on at least a couple of levels, Rams Head Live presents “Sounds of Seattle,” with self-explanatory tribute bands Ten, Badmotorfinger, and Nevermind. DJs Adam Gonzo and Marc Brown’s monthly dance party Served hosts New York bit-hop producer GDFX and Philly DJ Flufftronix at the Windup Space. Washington-based pop-punk outfit Playground Etiquette plays its record release party at Sonar with Cubbiebear, Play Pause Repeat, and the Escape Artist. The very worthy prog-metal outfit Dysrhythmia rattles the Talking Head

electronic- and dance-leaning musicians takes over the Windup Space with A/V artist Mark Brown, dance-rock duo Thrust Lab, American, and Human Host, a wildly unpredictable band-cumperformance-art project. The White Tie Affair, a Chicago outfit that makes honed-for-radio, danceable electronic rock, suits up at the Ottobar with Rookie of the Year, Way Too Serious, and Count Your Blessings.

to the Face, Johnstomper aka Ben Is the Bastard, HelloKittyMotherFuckers, Repulsing Terror, and Pumpkin Patchwork. A healthy portion of Baltimore’s improvisors gather at the Red Room at Normals Books and Records for a night of oneoff duos, including John Berndt/ Rose Burt, Samuel Burt/John Dierker, Carson Garhardt/ Peter Blasser, and Ami Dang/ WEDNESDAY: Local guy-andTom Boram. Japanther—an un- guitar singer/songwriter Matt Pless derground favorite-cum-legend that heads up a night at the Ottobar makes wicked catchy punk a la the with the Chemical Electric and Ramones cut up with samples— Flipside of Overdrive. The Duc gets the hipster kettle boiling at the D’Angelos Quartet—a very cool, Ottobar with Ninjasonik and Totally hip-hop influenced electro-acoustic Michael. It’s pretty common knowl- improvisation ensemble—brings edge by now that Dark Side of the its downtempo groove to Joe Squared. Moon has some curious synch properties IN THE WINGS: with The Wizard of Oz, Giddy indie-pop duo and Pink Floyd cover FOR MORE SHOW Matt and Kim come outfit the Machine PREVIEWS, REVIEWS to the Ottobar Feb. 26 does the album live AND ANY OTHER with Hollywood Holt tonight with a bigMUSIC INFO FIT TO and Sick Weapons. screen projection of PRINT ONLINE, (For more information the movie at Rams PLEASE TO VISIT visit theottobar.com or Head Live. Swedish NOISE.CITYPAPER.COM call [410] 662-0069.) throwback psych-rock Thrash metal brutalizer outfit Dead Man Pulling Teeth comes to gets heads swirling the Talking Head Feb. at the Talking Head with Heroin UK, Radio Moscow, 25 with Magrudergrind, Amen Ra, and the Flying Eyes. The Sidebar Zoroaster, and Pala. (For more hosts a massive day of Clash wor- information visit talkingheadclub.com ship that starts off in the afternoon or call [410] 207-8011.) And for more with a brunch and screenings of vari- show previews, reviews, and any other ous Clash and Clash-related video music info fit to print online, please ephemera and a night of tributes from visit City Paper’s music blog Noise National Razor, International at noise.citypaper.com.

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FRAZIER’S ON THE AVENUE. Bluesette Reunion. GRAND CENTRAL. Dance Central. HIPPO. DJ Steve Durkin. JAMES JOYCE IRISH PUB AND RESTAURANT. Someone Else. JAY’S ON READ. Dave Kessler, Phil Vendemmia. JOE SQUARED. Kreation and Kim Poole. LA PALAPA GRILL AND CANTINA. DJ Vega. LOONEY’S PUB NORTH. Star 69. MICK O’SHEA’S. Mixed Business. 9:30 CLUB. Blowoff with DJ Bob Mould and Richard Morel. THE OTTOBAR. Funky Reggae Party, Japanther, Ninjasonik, Totally Michael. PALMA NIGHTCLUB. Damien Daniel. PAUL’S BAR. Karaoke with DJ DanDaMan. PHILLIPS HARBORPLACE. Brain Comotto. PICKLES PUB. Troubled Spirit. RAMS HEAD TAVERN. Capitol Steps, Taylor Hicks. RECHER THEATRE. Brett Dennen, Angel Taylor. ROCK AND ROLL HOTEL. Mass Appeal with Auto Rock, Once Okay Twice, Theorycast, Minus-One, Conshafter. RYAN’S DAUGHTER. Chris Shucosky from Cinder Road. SIDEBAR. 2nd Annual Clash Tribute Night. SONAR. The Dance Party, Static Brigade, Young Enough, the Grenade, PJtheViking, TerrorDactel. TALKING HEAD. Heroin UK, Dead Man, Radio Moscow, the Flying Eyes. WATERFRONT HOTEL. Bonnie Boswell, Old School. THE WINDUP SPACE. E. Joseph and the Phantom Heart, Chris Schutz and the Tourists.

CONCERTS BOB MARLEY’S BIRTHDAY AND SOUL SHAKEDOWN PARTY. Andre Mazelin curates a night of Jamaican culture with Unity Reggae Band, Janelia Soul Afrique, and Jahiti. 8 P.M., Creative Alliance at the Patterson, 3134 Eastern Ave., (410) 276-1651, creativealliance. org, $12, members and students $10. EL RANCHO GRANDE BENEFIT/ANNIVERSARY SHOW. With Wye Oak, Caleb Stine, Ellen Cherry, Timothy Bracken, Andrew Grimm, Stephen Strohmeier, Katie Feild, MacGregor Burns and the VCR, Kathy Fahey, and Young Sir Jim. 8-11 P.M., Metro Gallery, 1700 N. Charles St., themetrogallery.net, $20. JUKE JOINT DUO CD RELEASE PARTY FOR 2 MAN WRECKING CREW. Joint Lightin’ Malcolm and Cedric Burnside. 8 P.M., Rosedale American Legion Hall, 1311 Seling Ave., Rosedale, (410) 744-2291, $20, $15 advance. THE MAK ANDA PROJECT FEATURING CARL GRUBBS. 8 and 9:30 P.M., An die Musik, 409 N. Charles St., (410) 385-2638, andiemusik.com, $15, students and seniors $10. A NIGHT OF DUOS. With John Berndt and Rose Burt, Samuel Burt and John Dierker, Peter Blasser and Carson Garhardt, and Tom Boram and Ami Dang. 8:30 P.M., Red Room, Normals Books and Records, 425 E. 31st St., (410) 243-6888, redroom.org, $5. PERRY HALL FOLK MUSIC NIGHT. 7-10 P.M., Perry Hall United Methodist Church, 9515 Belair Road, (410) 529-7176, perryhallumc.org, free, donations welcome .

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B I R C H M E R E . Over the Rhine with Cassidy Project. BLACK CAT. The Morning Benders, the Submarines,

NOW HEAR THIS

LARKIN GRIMM FEB. 5 Larkin Grimm makes forest-creature-cum-gypsy music of an odd, wonderful sort. A multi-instrumentalist/folk songwriter/former Dirty Projector/anarchist/raised-in-a-cult moon worshipper, Grimm writes spare songs full of dulcimer, banjo, guitar, and voice—good Lord, her voice, an angelic instrument that both hisses with fury and glows with cool, resplendent light. Her recent album on Michael Gira’s Young God label, Parplar, is well worth bringing an extra $10 or so to the show. Note that opener Vows is Shaun Flynn in a solo post-WZT Hearts endeavor. Get there early. 9 P.M., Talking Head, 407 E. Saratoga St., (410) 207-8011, talkingheadclub.com, $8. (Michael Byrne)

Dawn Landes. CHARM CITY ART SPACE. Let Me Run, Jerk City, Turn It Up. THE CLADDAGH PUB. Premiere Karaoke. CLUB ONE. Sunday Steam with DJ Tanz. HORSE YOU CAME IN ON. Rob Fahey. MELI. Ryan Diehl Trio. 9:30 CLUB. Cat Power. THE OTTOBAR. Octaves, Age Sixteen, Maddison, the Kindness of Strangers, Pianos Becomes the Teeth, Alarmed, Oedipus, Blast the Stereo, This Message, Death of a Thane. PHILLIPS HARBORPLACE. Dick Smith. RAMS HEAD TAVERN. Walter Beasley. RED MAPLE. Professional Soul Night. REDHOUSE TAVERN. Slumdaze. WATERFRONT HOTEL. The Local. THE WINDUP SPACE. Broadcast Live, Son of Nun,


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city paper | 43


BALTIMORE WEEKLY CLU BS/CONCERTS

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CONTI NUED

CONCERTS BRENT FLINCHBAUGH AND JOY GREENE. Part of Old St. Paul’s Tuesday Music Series. 12:15-12:45 P.M., Old St. Paul’s Church, Charles and Saratoga streets, (410) 685-3404, oldstpauls.ang-md.org, free. JAZZ AT GERMANO’S. With the Ashton Fletcher Trio. 7:30 P.M., Germano’s Trattoria, 300 S. High St., (410) 752-4515, germanostrattoria.com, $10 cover, $15 drink and food minimum.

Ryan Harvey, Rebel Inc., Gray.

CONCERTS CORYELL, AUGER, SAMPLE TRIO. With Julian Coryell, Karma Auger, and Nick Sample. 5 P.M., An die Musik, 409 N. Charles St., (410) 385-2638, andiemusik.com, $15.

WEDNESDAY 4 CHAMBER MUSIC WITH JEFFREY WEISNER. Part of the Sylvia Adalman Recital Series. 8 P . M ., Peabody Institute, 1 E. Mount Vernon Place, (410) 659-8100, peabody.jhu.edu/events, $15, seniors $10, students $5.

WEDNESDAY 11 MONDAY 9

THURSDAY 5

BIRCHMERE. The Puppini Sisters. BLACK CAT. The Pains of Being Pure at Heart, the Depreciation Guild, the Sugarplums. CHARM CITY ART SPACE. Soul Control, Dead Mechanical, Rebuilt, Alarmed. THE CLADDAGH PUB. Ed Lauer, Frank Florence. CLUB 347. Jazz Jam Session. THE DEPOT. Maximum Soul Mondaze with Selector Pablo Fiasco. EDEN’S LOUNGE. Live Jazz with Lady D. hosted by Mully Man. THE 8X10. Open mic. FLETCHER’S. Noise in the Basement featuring Skitzo Calypso, Late for August, the Victory Hour, Paperback Tragedy. HORSE YOU CAME IN ON. Rockin’ Karaoke. JOE SQUARED. Classic Hipster Animal. LOONEY ’S PUB NORTH. Wes Cohen and David Orwig. THE OTTOBAR. Metal as Fuck Monday’s featuring Shat, Ruin, Copstabber,. RAMS HEAD TAVERN. Gaelic Storm. REDHOUSE TAVERN. Fools and Horses. SHORTY’S MARTINI BAR AND LOUNGE. Noize In The Attic. SIDEBAR. Rebel Inc., Charm City’s Motor City Envy, Doping the Void. S I S T A’ S P L A C E . M e ga M o n d ay s w i t h DJ Spontaneous. WATERFRONT HOTEL. Bonnie Boswell.

CONCERTS

PEABODY JAZZ STUDENTS. 7:30 P.M., An die Musik, 409 N. Charles St., (410) 385-2638, andiemusik.com, $8, students $5.

TUESDAY 10 BIRCHMERE. Gary Louris and Mark Olson: From the Jayhawks. BLACK CAT. Andy Zipf, Kaiser Cartel. THE BLACK HOLE. Revenge of the Riff with Christoff from 98 Rock. THE CLADDAGH PUB. Will Hill. CLUB 347. Blues Jam Session. EDEN’S LOUNGE. Open mic and spoken word with Fertile Ground and Olu Butterfly. THE 8X10. Five Bands for Five Bucks. EXPLORER’S LOUNGE. Dick Smith. HIPPO. Showtune Video Madness. HORSE YOU CAME IN ON. Open mic. JAY’S ON READ. Herb Merrick. JOE SQUARED. Dig with Landis Expandis and DJ Napspace. JUDGE’S BENCH PUB. Open Mic night with Mark Jacob. L A PAL APA GRILL AND CANTINA. College night with DJ. LOONEY’S PUB NORTH. Mix 106.5 DJ Jon Boesche’. THE OTTOBAR. The White Tie Affair, Rookie of the Year, Way Too Serious, Count Your Blessings. PICKLES PUB. Karaoke night. RAMS HEAD TAVERN. Gaelic Storm.

44 | city paper

CLASSICAL

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

EL RANCHO GRANDE BENEFIT/ ANNIVERSARY SHOW

ANGELS ROCK BAR. L-80’s Night. BIRCHMERE. Sara Bareilles with Tony Lucca. BLACK CAT. Lambchop. CHEESEBURGER IN PARADISE. Battle. CLUB ONE. Salsa Uno with guest DJs. CLUB 347. The Panama Band. EDEN’S LOUNGE. Singles Night with DJ Tanz. EXPLORER’S LOUNGE. Dick Smith. JAY’S ON READ. Larry Buck. JOE SQUARED. Due D’Angelos Quartet. THE OTTOBAR. Matt Pless, the Chemical Electric Flipside of Overdrive. RAMS HEAD TAVERN. Lloyd Dobler Effect and Pressing Effect. RED MAPLE. Oasis. ROCK AND ROLL HOTEL. Not Dead Yet, the Rebirth with DJ Derek Keane. ROCK AND ROLL HOTEL. Hoots and Hellmouth, the Jones, the Petticoat Team Room. RUSH HOUR SPORTS BAR AND GRILL. Ladies Night with DJ Spontaneous. SILVER SHADOWS CLUB. Open mic. WATERFRONT HOTEL. Pressing Strings.

CIRQUE DE LA SYMPHONIE. Stunning aerial feats, strong-men, mind-boggling contortionists and juggling acts will take your breath away as the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra performs orchestral hits. 8 P.M., Music Center at Strathmore, 5301 Tuckerman Lane, North Bethesda, (410) 783-8000, baltimoresymphony. org, $25-$80.

FRIDAY 6 CIRQUE DE LA SYMPHONIE. Stunning aerial feats, strong-men, mind-boggling contortionists and juggling acts will take your breath away as the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra performs orchestral hits. 8 P.M., also Saturday and Sunday, Meyerhoff Symphony Hall, 1212 Cathedral St., (410) 783-8000, baltimoresymphony. org, $25-$80. PEABODY CONCERT ORCHESTRA. With special guests Hajime Teri Murai and Anthony McGill. 8 P.M., Friedberg Concert Hall, Peabody Conservatory of Music, 1 E. Mount Vernon Place, (410) 659-8124, peabody.jhu.edu, $15, seniors $10, students $5 .

FEB. 7 El Rancho Grande may just be one of the better, more intimate music spaces you haven’t yet been to. Perched just off the Avenue in Hampden, the unassuming coffeeshop-by-day hosts mainly acoustic folk/singer-songwriter fare in a space refreshingly divorced from “scene” or pretense or, well, amplifiers. And it needs money. Tonight’s event is a combo anniversary party and benefit—hence the steep price tag—bringing together an assortment of local songwriting personalities, including an acoustic set from interminably lovely rock duo Wye Oak, country-leaning songwriter Caleb Stine (pictured), Ellen Cherr y, Stephen Strohmeier, and many more. 8 P.M., Metro Gallery, 1700 N. Charles St., myspace.com/metrogallery, $20. (Michael Byrne)

THE RED HOUSE TAVERN. Acoustic open mic. RED MAPLE. Live Flamenco with guitarist Ricardo Marlow. SHORTY’S MARTINI BAR AND LOUNGE. Dirty Ralph and B-Side. WATERFRONT HOTEL. Jettison. THE WINDUP SPACE. Mark Brown, Thrust Lab, Human Host, American.

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THE PULSE OF AFRICA BRINGS WEST AFRICAN DANCE, MUSIC, AND FOLKLORE TO THE WALTERS ART MUSEUM FEB. 7.


BALTIMORE WEEKLY

SATURDAY 7 HAJIME TERI MURAI. This is a voice faculty recital with Steven Rainbolt, Robert Muckenfuss, and Maria Barnes. 7:30 P.M., Friedberg Concert Hall, Peabody Conservatory of Music, 1 E. Mount Vernon Place, (410) 659-8124, peabody.jhu.edu, free.

SUNDAY 8 CYPRESS STRING QUARTET. Playing Debussy String Quartet in G Minor, Five Pieces for String Quartet by Erwin Schulhoff, and String Quartet in F Major by Franz Joseph Hayden. 3:30 P . M ., Second Presbyterian Church, 4200 St. Paul St., (443) 759-3309, secondpresby.org, free, donations accepted. 4 HANDS AND 4 FEET. Featuring works by Alkins, Bach, Merkel, Wagner, Leighton, Strauss, and Sousa. 4 P.M., Peabody Institute / Griswold Hall, 1 E. Mount Vernon Place, (410) 659-8100, pcm.peabody.jhu. edu, $5-$15. RADU L APU. Part of the Sidney and Charlton Friedberg concert series. 5:30 P.M., Shriver Hall, Homewood campus, Johns Hopkins University, Charles and 34th streets, (410) 516-7164, shriverconcerts.org, $33, students $17.

WEDNESDAY 11 PEABODY WIND ENSEMBLE. Harlan D. Parker, as Conductor, playing Felix Mendelssohn-Bartholdy’s Overture for wind instruments in C major, Op. 24, “Harmoniemusik”, Walter Piston’s Tunbridge Fair, Eric Whitacre’s October, Edward Gregson’s Metamorphoses, James Syler’s The Hound of Heaven, Florent Schmitt’s Dionysiaques. 7:30 P.M., Friedberg Concert Hall, Peabody Conservatory of Music, 1 E. Mount Vernon Place, (410) 659-8124, peabody.jhu.edu, $5-$15.

DANCE & DANCING WEDNESDAY 4 CONTRADANCING. 8 P.M., Lovely Lane Methodist Church, 2200 St. Paul St., (410) 366-0808, $12, BFMS members and affiliates $8, full-time students receive a $3 discount. CHARM CITY SWING LESSONS. 7:30-10:30 P.M. , Vietnam Veterans of America, Baltimore Chapter 451, 6401 Beckley St., (443) 928-4797, vva451.org/ mohr, charmcityswing.com. TANGO FUNDAMENTALS. 7-8 P.M. and advanced 8-9 P.M., BlueHouse, 1407 Fleet St., (410) 563-4200, bluehouselife.com/cafe.php, theotherkiss.com, $10-$12.

THURSDAY 5 ARGENTINE TANGO DANCE FUNDAMENTALS. 7 P.M., True Balance Studio, 1021 N. Cathedral St., (410) 800-2812, truebalancestudio.com, $111-$125. NIA MOVEMENT/DANCE CL ASSES. 8-9 P . M ., Homewood Friends Meeting House, 3107 N. Charles St., (443) 845-6224, $13 drop-in. TANGO FUSION. 8:30-10 P.M., StudioDNA, 1301 Baylis St., Suite # 228, (443) 794-1139, , $40 per month or $12 walk-in.

FRIDAY 6 BALLROOM DANCING LESSONS. 8 P.M., Johns Hopkins University, Homewood campus, (410) 599-3725, jhu.edu, free. citypaper.com

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

city paper | 45


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BALTIMORE WEEKLY DANCE & DANCI NG

CONTI NUED

ZEN SALSA. Beginner/Intermediate lesson at 9:30 P.M., open dancing ‘til close. Zen West, 5916 York Road, (410) 271-8558, $7-$10.

SATURDAY 7 CANTON SALSA DANCING. 7:30 P.M.-midnight, Hucka’s Sports Pub, 2324 Boston St., (410) 522-7770, huckassportsbar.com, $10 . FAMILY DANCING. 11 A.M.-12:30 P.M., Baltimore Yoga Village, 3000 Chestnut Ave. #15, (410) 662-8626, baltimoreyogavillage.com, drop-in $15 with child.

SUNDAY 8 BELLY DANCING, TOFE. 12:30-1:30 P.M., Great Soul Wellness Studio, 4711 Harford Road, (410) 254-2786, greatsoulwellness.com, $12.

MONDAY 9 NIA MOVEMENT/DANCE CL AS SES. 8-9 P . M ., Homewood Friends Meeting House, 3107 N. Charles St., (443) 845-6224, $13 drop-in. POLKA HOP, RUMBA, AND OBEREK LESSONS. 7-9:15 P.M., Our Lady of Fatima Dance Club, 6429 E. Pratt St. , (410) 285-5036, ourladyoffatima-baltimore.org, $20.

TUESDAY 10 TUESDAY TANGO PRACTICA. 8-11 P . M ., Merritt’s Downtown Athletic Club, 210 E. Centre St., (410) 3320906, $5.

WEDNESDAY 11 BALLROOM DANCING. 6-9:30 P.M., the Belvedere, 1 E. Chase St., (410) 332-1000, $17. BELLY DANCING. 7:30-8:30 P.M., Homewood Friends Meeting House, 3107 N. Charles St., (410) 627-9357, $10. DANCE LESSONS. 5:30-10 P.M., La Fontaine Bleu, 3120 Erdman Ave., (410) 833-9474, $17.

DANCE CONCERTS FRIDAY 6 BALTIMORE’S PREMIERE BELLY DANCING SHOW. Reservations recommended. 9 P.M., also Saturdays, Cazbar, 316 N. Charles St., (410) 528-1222, cazbarbaltimore.com.

SATURDAY 7 THE PULSE OF AFRICA. Performance featuring West African music, dance, and folklore. 2 P.M., Walters Art Museum, 600 N. Charles St., (410) 547-9000, thewalters.org, free.

GAY & LESBIAN ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS. 8:30 P . M . Mondays and Thursdays, 6:30 P.M. Saturdays, Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Baltimore, 241 W. Chase St., (410) 837-5445, glccb.org, free. BEGINNER’S YOGA. 3:30 P . M . Sundays, 7:15 P . M . Wednesdays, Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Baltimore, 241 W. Chase St., (410) 837-5445, glccb. org, $9. BROTHERS OF BARAZA. The Portal, Baltimore’s African-American GLBT Community Center, 2419 Greenmount Ave., suite 4, (410) 962-8838, theportalbmoreonline.org.

JESUS CHRIST SUPERSTAR IS WHAT’S HAPPENING AT LYRIC OPERA HOUSE FEB. 6-7. FREE HIV AND STD TESTING. 5-8 P.M. TuesdaysThursdays, Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Baltimore, 241 W. Chase St., (410) 837-5445, glccb.org, free. HEARTS AND EARS, INC. DROP-IN AND RESOURCE CENTER. 4-9 P.M. Tuesdays, Thursdays, and Saturdays, 1-6 P.M. Sundays, Hearts and Ears, Inc., 10 W. Biddle St., suite 1F, (410) 528-0444, heartsandears.org. HIV TESTING AND COUNSELING. 9 A . M .-7 P . M . Mondays-Thursdays, Chase Brexton Health Services, 1001 Cathedral St., (410) 837-5445, chasebrexton.org, free, donations welcome. J.U.M.P. SUPPORT GROUP. 7-8:30 P.M. Thursdays, the Portal, Baltimore’s African-American GLBT Community Center, 2419 Greenmount Ave., suite 4, (443) 803-6909, theportalbmoreonline.org. NARCOTICS ANONYMOUS. 11:30 A.M. Sundays, Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Baltimore, 241 W. Chase St., (410) 837-5445, glccb.org. SAIM - GLBT YOUTH GROUP. 12:30 P.M. Saturdays, Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Baltimore, 241 W. Chase St., (410) 837-5445, glccb.org, free. STONEWALL DEMOCRATS ORGANIZING MEETING. 7:30-9:30 P.M. Feb. 4, Brown Memorial Presbyterian Church, 1316 Park Ave., (410) 523-1542, MHGP.org, free. THAT ALL MAY FREELY SERVE: BALTIMORE. Cabaret fundraiser. 6:30 P.M. Feb. 7, Govans Presbyterian Church, 5828 York Road, Towson, (410) 435-9188, $25, four tickets $80. WALK-IN SEXUAL HEALTH SERVICES. STD Clinic hours 9 A . M .-4 P . M . Mondays-Fridays. Emergency

Contraception and low-cost birth control services 5-7 P.M. Mondays, Wednesdays, and Thursdays, Chase Brexton Health Services, 1001 Cathedral St., (410) 8372050, chasebrexton.org. WOMEN OF COLOR - SUPPORT GROUP. 7:30 P.M. Thursdays, Gay and Lesbian Community Center of Baltimore, room 201, 241 W. Chase St., (410) 837-5445, glccb.org, free.

STAGE AN EVENING WITH ABRAHAM LINCOLN. Lincoln impersonator and historian James Getty presents his one-man show. 7:30 P.M. Feb. 6, Johns Hopkins University, 110 Hodson Hall, (410) 516-4842, greatthinkers.jhu.edu/lincoln, free. DIAL M FOR MURDER. Alfred Hitchcock’s classic thriller. Through March 15. 6 P.M. Fridays-Saturdays, 1 P.M. Sundays, Lorenzo’s Timonium Dinner Theatre, 9603 Deereco Road, Timonium, (410) 560-1113, timoniumdinnertheatre.com, buy one, get one half off. THE EAGLE HAS LANDED. A show about memory and the presence of someone who is no longer there presented by Fool’s Proof Theatre. Through Feb. 8. 8 P.M. Thursdays-Saturdays, 2 P.M. Sundays, Theatre Project, 45 W. Preston St., (410) 752-8558, theatreproject.org, $20, artists and seniors $15, students $10. FABULATION OR THE RE-EDUCATION OF UNDINE. Written by Lynn Nottage; directed by Jackson Gay. Through March 8. 8 P.M. Wednesdays and Fridays, 7 P.M. Thursdays, 2 and 7 P.M. Saturdays, 2 P.M. Sundays, Centerstage, 700 N. Calvert St., (410) 332-0033, center-

stage.org, $10-$60. GREASE. The national tour of the famous musical featuring the winners from television’s Grease: You’re the One that I Want. Through Feb. 15. 8 P.M. TuesdaysFridays, 2 and 8 P.M. Saturdays, 1 and 6:30 P.M. Sundays, Hippodrome Theatre, 12 N. Eutaw St., (410) 837-7400, france-merrickpac.com, $22-$67. THE HOMECOMING . Written by Harold Pinter. Through Feb. 15. 8 P.M. Fridays-Saturdays, 2 P.M. Sundays, Fells Point Corner Theatre, 251 S. Ann St., (410) 276-7837, fpct.org, $15-$17. I AM MY OWN WIFE. Tony- and Pulitzer Prize-winning drama written by Doug Wright. Through Feb. 22. 7:30 P.M. Wednesdays-Thursdays, 8 P.M. Fridays, 2 and 8 P.M. Saturdays, 2 and 7 P.M. Sundays, Everyman Theatre, 1727 N. Charles St., (410) 752-2208, everymantheatre. org, $16-$38. JESUS CHRIST SUPERSTAR. This musicals tells the story of the final seven days of Jesus of Nazareth. 8 P.M. Feb. 6-7, Lyric Opera House, 140 W. Mount Royal Ave., (410) 685-5086, lyricoperahouse.com, $40-$60. ROMANCE/ROMANCE. Two one-act musicals with books and lyrics by Barry Harman and music by Keith Herrmann. Through Feb. 8. 8 P.M. Fridays-Saturdays, 2 P.M. Sundays, Vagabond Players, 806 S. Broadway, (410) 563-9135, bcpl.net/~thevag/index.htm, $20. THE TEMPEST. Baltimore Shakespeare Festival presents its sixth annual Teen Performance Program. Opens Feb. 5. Through Feb. 15. 8 P.M. Thursdays-Saturdays, 5 P.M. Sundays, St. Mary’s Outreach Center, 3900 Roland

citypaper.com

CONTINUED ON PAGE 50 FEBRUARY 4, 2009

city paper | 47


I.M.P. PRESENTS AT D.A.R. Constitution Hall • Washington D.C. THIS WEEK’S SHOWS

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emmet swimming w/ Trustfall & Adam Swink

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Rodney Atkins w/ The Lost Trailers ................................................................................................Sa 14 Fujiya and Miyagi w/ School of Seven Bells ................................................................................Th 19

Drive-By Truckers w/ Bloodkin ............................................................F 20 & Sa 21

TOM JONES FEBRUARY 25

Ben Kweller w/ The Watson Twins & The Jones Street Boys ........................................................Th 26 MARCH

Jason Isbell and the 400 Unit w/ Deer Tick ..........................................................................Su 1 Missy Higgins & Justin Nozuka ................................................................................................M 2

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..........................................................................Tu 3

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Lisa Hannigan w/ The Low Anthem ....................................................................................................Su 8 Bell X1 w/ Harlem Shakes Early Show! 6pm Doors ................................................................................Th 12 Ozomatli reunited with Chali 2na Late Show! 10pm Doors ................................................Th 12

Merriweather Post Pavilion • Columbia, MD

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Kinky ............................................................................................................................................................F 13 The Feelies ............................................................................................................................................Sa 14

THE POGUES ........................................................................................................................W 18 The Ting Tings........................................................................................................................................F 20 Butch Walker ........................................................................................................................................Sa 21 Cut Copy w/ Matt and Kim & DJ Knightlife ..........................................................................................M 23 MN8 P RESENTS

Raphael Saadiq ..................................................................................................................................Tu 24 Booka Shade ..........................................................................................................................................W 25 APRIL ROCKSTAR ENERGY DRINK PRESENTS THE AP TOUR FEATURING

SATURDAY, APRIL 25 WWW.MERRIWEATHERMUSIC.COM

3OH!3 • The Maine • Family Force 5 • Hit the Lights • A Rocket to the Moon ..............................................................................F 24

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city paper | 49


50 | city paper

BALTIMORE WEEKLY STAGE

CONTI NUED

Ave., (410) 366-3106, $15, students $10. THE TR AGEDY OF MACBETH . Presented by the Maryland Shakespeare Festival. Through Feb. 15. 8 P . M . Fridays-Saturdays, 2 P . M . Sundays, Centennial Memorial Methodist Church, 8 W. 2nd St., Frederick, (301) 668-4090, $25, children, seniors, and military $25.

COMEDY BALTIMORE COMEDY FACTORY, 36 Light St., (410) 547-7798, BaltimoreComedy.com. Paul Mecurio, Larry XL. 8 P.M. Feb. 5; 8 and 10 P.M. and midnight Feb. 6; 7, 9, and 11 P.M. Feb. 7; $17. MAGOOBY’S JOKE HOUSE, 9306 Harford Road, Carney, (410) 356-1010, magoobys.com. Joe Matarese, Josh Accardo. 8 and 10:15 P.M. Feb. 6-7; $12.

ART ALBIN O. KUHN LIBRARY GALLERY, University of Maryland Baltimore County, 1000 Hilltop Circle, Catonsville, (410) 455-3827, aok.lib.umbc.edu/gallery. Photographs of James L. Amos: Geographic, Illustrative, and Personal. Photos by the Chestertown-based photographer James L. Amos. Through March 23. AMERICAN VISIONARY ART MUSEUM, 800 Key Highway, (410) 244-1900, avam.org. The Marriage of Art, Science, and Philosophy. Works by over 100 visionary artists/scientists/inventors and philosophers. Through Sept. 6. AN DIE MUSIK, 409 N. Charles St., (410) 385-2638, andiemusik.com. E/IL -LUSIVE SPACES. An exhibit of color film photographs by Mónica López-González. 6 P.M. Feb. 5. ART GALLERY OF FELLS POINT, 1716 Thames St., (410) 327-1272, fellspointgallery.org. Original Art and prints from local artists including Bernard McGibbon. Through Feb. 22 (reception 5-9 P.M. Feb. 6). ART UNDER GROUND STUDIO, 826 W. 36th St., (410) 800-4230, quirkyspace.com. Friends with Benefits. Second annual Valentine’s exhibit saluting the better half. Opens Feb. 6 (reception Feb. 7). Through Feb. 28. ASIAN ARTS AND CULTURE CENTER AT TOWSON UNIVERSITY, Center for the Arts, Towson University, Osler and Cross Campus drives, Towson, (410) 7042807, towson.edu/asianarts. Ancient Bronzes of the Asian Grasslands. Includes 80 bronze ornaments from the Asian Grasslands. Opening reception 3-5 P.M. Feb. 9. Ostriches and Silent Flowers: Japanese Paintings by Kotaro Fukui. This exhibition is composed of the eloquent Ostrich Paintings and the Silent Flowers Series. Opens Feb. 7 (opening reception and painting demonstration 2-4 P.M.). Through March 14. BALTIMORE CLAYWORKS, 5707 Smith Ave., (410) 578-1919, baltimoreclayworks.org. An Abundance of Cups. Personal porcelain cups by Deborah Bedwell. Through Feb. 27. Teapots IV. Works by multiple artists jurored by David MacDonald. Through Feb. 27. BALTIMORE GALLERY 321, 321 W. Madison Ave., (410) 523-0249, baltimoregallery321.com. Talking Heads . . . Figuratively Speaking. Featuring Rebecca Waring, Regina Brown, Gil Jawetz, Thomas Del Porte, and Craig Paul Nowak. Through Feb. 5. BALTIMORE MUSEUM OF ART, 10 Art Museum Drive, (443) 573-1700, artbma.org. African Art Collection at the BMA. Numbering more than 2,000 objects from ancient Egypt to contemporary Zimbabwean art. A Grand Legacy: Five Centuries of European Art. Features the monumental Rinaldo and Armida, one of the world’s finest paintings by Sir Anthony van Dyck, as well as masterpieces by Frans Hals, Rembrandt van Rijn, and Jean Baptiste Siméon Chardin. FEBRUARY 4, 2009

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C. GRIMALDIS GALLERY, 523 N. Charles St., (410) 539-1080, cgrimaldisgallery.com. Neil Meyerhoff: New Photographs, Children. Photographs of children taken in Bhutan, Ecuador, India, Mexico, Vietnam, New York, and Maryland. Through Feb. 28. Hidenori Ishii: A little Earthshine. New paintings which are Ishiih’s investigation of integrating psychological and environmental systems. Through Feb. 28. CHARLES THEATRE, 1711 N. Charles St., (410) 7273456, thecharles.com. Yo! The Power of Love in 3-D! Works by members of the Charles Theatre Workers Union. Opens Feb. 5 (opening reception 7-9 P.M.). Through March 31. THE CONTEMPORARY MUSEUM, 100 W. Centre St., (410) 783-5720, contemporary.org. Dawoud Bey: Class Pictures. Bey photographed young people from all parts of the economic, racial, and ethnic spectrum in both public and private high schools. In cooperation with the Walters Art Museum. Through Feb. 16. CREATIVE ALLIANCE AT THE PATTERSON, 3134 Eastern Ave., (410) 276-1651, creativealliance.org. The Rumors are True: Megan Hildebrandt and Christine Sajecki . Resident artists of the Creative Alliance Christine Sajecki and Megan Hildebrandt paint and perform their concept of the changing dynamic of their neighborhood habitat. Through Feb. 21. Pamela Phatsimo Sunstrum: Soft Animal. Sunstrum depicts her alter-ego Asme, on a hero’s quest with a vast landscape for the background. Through Feb. 21. To the Teeth. Works by a group of artists made up of Creative Alliance Resident Artists and their colleagues. Opens Feb. 5 (reception with Creative Alliance’s Open House 6-9 P.M. Feb. 6). Through Feb. 21. CURRENT GALLERY AND ARTIST COOPERATIVE, 30 S. Calvert St., currentspace.com. So Many Organs. Collection of drawings, paintings, photographs, and mixed media works by Liz Donadio, Dina Kelberman, and Ryan Syrell. Through Feb. 13. DOUGHERTY’S IRISH PUB, 223 W. Chase St., (410) 752-4059. Allison Pasarew Solo Exhibition. Opens Feb. 5 (opening reception 6-9 P.M.). Through March 4. ENOCH PRATT FREE LIBRARY, CENTRAL LIBRARY, 400 Cathedral St., (410) 396-5430, prattlibrary.org/ locations. Enoch Pratt’s Living Legacy: Celebrating the Bicentennial of Enoch Pratt’s Birth. The library’s archives of photos, letters, and other memorabilia will be on display. Through Feb. 14. Edgar Allan Poe: More Than a Poet. An exhibition of letters, photographs, and other memorabilia belonging to Poe from the Pratt Library’s archives. Through April 25. GALERIE FRANCOISE II, 3500 Parkdale Ave., suite 22, (443) 632-4785. Drawings by Reuben Kramer. From the Collection of Maryland Institute College of Art. Through March 2. GALLERY 1448, Artists’ Housing, 1448 E. Baltimore St., (410) 327-1554, 1448.org. Erotica ‘09: Callipygian Desiderata. Works by Christina McCleary and Trudy Babchak. Opens Feb. 6 (opening reception 6-8 P.M.). Through Feb. 22. GALLERY IMPERATO, 921 E. Fort Ave., suite 120, (443) 257-4166, galleryimperato.com. Guns and Chandeliers. This exhibition is about how common objects are interpreted and what they symbolize. Through March 14. GEPPI’S ENTERTAINMENT MUSEUM, 301 W. Camden St., (410) 625-7060, geppismuseum.com. Barbie: Fifty Fashionable Years. A half century of dream houses, sports cars, fashions and hairstyles, and how Barbara Millicent Roberts affected pop culture. Through May 31. GOYA CONTEMPORARY / GOYA-GIRL PRESS, Mill Center, 3000 Chestnut Ave., Suite 214, (410) 3662001, goyagirl.com. Painful Death/Painless Life. Joyce J. Scott’s new sculpture, in coordination with the 3rd Annual Conference for African-American Art. Through Feb. 6.


BALTIMORE WEEKLY

LIVE MUSIC, KITCHEN & BAR

JOHNS HOPKINS UNIVERSITY, HOMEWOOD CAMPUS, 3400 N. Charles St. Next to Godliness: Cleanliness in Early Maryland. This student-curated focus show explores aspects of clean and dirty in the early 19th century. Through March 29. LUCINDA GALLERY AND UNIQUE BOUTIQUE, 929 S. Charles St., (410) 727-2782. Looking Back/ Leaping Forward. Retrospective and new art by Kenlynn K. Schroeder. Through March 1. MARYL AND HISTORICAL SOCIETY, 201 W. Monument St., (410) 685-3750, mdhs.org. Maryland Through the Artist’s Eye. The permanent exhibition with more than 60 objects looks at Maryland’s history through the perspective of artists. Nipper’s Toyland. The permanent exhibit will showcase the toys Maryland children have played with for over 200 years. Maryland’s Maritime Heritage: From Fells Point to the World, 1760-1850. Explore Baltimore’s story as a major commercial sea port instrumental in the development of America’s culture. MARYLAND INSTITUTE COLLEGE OF ART, DECKER GALLERY, 1303 W. Mount Royal Ave., (410) 2252300, mica.edu. Follies, Predicaments, and Other Conundrums: The Works of Laure Drogoul. The first large-scale retrospective of the local interdisciplinary artist. Through March 15. METRO GALLERY, 1700 N. Charles St., themetrogallery.net. The Birdwatcher’s Companion. Showcased works by Katherine Fahey. Through Feb. 14. MICA, Maryland Institute College of Art, (410) 2252300, mica.edu. Unbroken Thread: Nature Painting and the American Imagination. Works by MICA faculty member Philip Koch. Through March 15 (reception 5-7 P.M. Feb. 5). MINAS GALLERY, 815 W. 36th St., (410) 732-4258, minasgalleryandboutique.com. Memoranda. Ruth Pettus’ ink studies are an extension of her “The Horizon Series,� a work where land, water, and sky change in subtle progression. Through Feb. 28.

THE OTTOBAR, 2549 N. Howard St., (410) 662-0069, theottobar.com. Faceless Pinups. Paintings by Elisa Wells. 6 P.M. Feb. 6. REGINALD F. LEWIS MUSEUM OF MARYLAND AFRICAN AMERICAN HISTORY AND CULTURE, 830 E. Pratt St., (410) 767-0473, africanamericanculture. org. 2009 Maryland Statewide High School Juried Art Exhibition. This year’s theme was inspired by the museum’s current exhibition, Courage: The Vision to End Segregation, the Guts to Fight for it.. Through Feb. 9. Courage: The Vision to End Segregation, the Guts to Fight for it.. In 2004, the Levine Museum of the New South commemorated the 50th anniversary of the 1954 decision, Brown vs. Board of Education by creating this traveling exhibit. Through March 1. S.C. LORD DESIGN, 3000 Chestnut Ave., suite 341, Mill Center, (410) 961-4597, sclorddesign.com. Rough Gods: Brutal Truth and Beauty. Works by photographer and music producer Michael Alago. Through March 14t. SCHOOL 33 ART CENTER, 1427 Light St., (410) 3964641, school33.org. Two Person Juried Exhibition. Featuring the politically and socially charged art of Eun Woo Cho and Liz Ensz in a variety of media. Through Feb. 7. School 33 Presents Maggie Gourlay. Through Feb. 28. SPORTS LEGENDS AT CAMDEN YARDS, 301 W. Camden St., (410) 727-1539. The Greatest Game Ever Played. Exhibit honoring Baltimore’s first football champions, the 1958 Baltimore Colts, and celebrating the 50th anniversary. Through June 30. Presidentelect Obama’s signed baseball on display. Through Feb. 8. STATION NORTH ARTS CAFÉ GALLERY, 1816 N. Charles St., (410) 625-6440, stationnortharts.com. Mack-Beck. Works by Baltimore artists Gloria Mack and Paul Beck. Through Feb. 9. TOP OF THE WORLD OBSERVATION LEVEL, World Trade Center, 401 E. Pratt St., (410) 837-8439, promo-

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BALTIMORE WEEKLY ART

CONTI NUED

tionandarts.com. A Slice of Historic Black Baltimore. Celebrates Black History Month by highlighting local residents, churches, education, entertainment, and organizations which have been instrumental in influencing society. Through March 1 (reception 6-9 P.M. Feb. 6). TOWSON ARTS COLLECTIVE, 410 York Road, Towson, (410) 916-6340, towsonartscollective.googlepages.com. Travel Exhibit: Where have you been? Various types of artwork will be displayed all focusing on the theme of travel. Through March 8. UNIVERSITY OF MARYLAND ART GALLERY, 1202 A-Sociology Building, College Park, (301) 405-2763, artgallery.umd.edu. linn meyers / here today. Part of the artist-in-residence program, Washington D.C. artist Linn Meyers created two large scale site-specific drawing installations, featuring D.C. sound artist Richard Chartier in a collaborative project in the back gallery. Opens Feb. 11 (opening reception 5:30-7:30 P.M.). Through March 13. WALTERS ART MUSEUM, 600 N. Charles St., (410) 547-9000, thewalters.org. Art of the Ancient Americas. Exhibition featuring artwork from all of the major civilizations of Mesoamerica, with a focus on small sculpture. Mummified. Learn about the mummification process and see Egyptian artifacts. Through Nov. 8. Portraits Re/Examined: A Dawoud Bey Project. This artist-in-residence project will take place in conjunction with the Contemporary Museum ‘s exhibition Class Pictures, featuring photographs by Dawoud Bey, who for the past several years has created portraits of young people challenging stereotypes about urban youth. Through Feb. 16. Romance of the Rose: Visions of Love in Illuminated Medieval Manuscripts. Dating from the 13th century, the poem was one of the most popular medieval literary texts. The Walters’ exhibition will also display a number of carved ivories from the museum’s medieval collection as well as the Rose manuscript. Through April 19. THE WINDUP SPACE, 10-12 W. North Ave., (410) 2448855, thewindupspace.com. Art Opening: Salon Show. A call for artists from the local Baltimore scene to display their artwork. 7 P.M. Feb. 6.

WORDS THURSDAY 5

VICTOR FLEMING: AN AMERICAN MOVIE MASTER. Michael Sragow gives a talk on his book about the director of Gone with the Wind and The Wizard of Oz. 7:30 P.M., Creative Alliance at the Patterson, 3134 Eastern Ave., (410) 276-1651, creativealliance.org, $10, members $8.

SATURDAY 7

MICHAEL AVERY. The former Guild president will discuss the new book he edited, We Dissent, as well as appointments to the federal bench under Barack Obama in room 108. 2 P.M., University of Maryland School of Law Ceremonial Courtroom, 500 W. Baltimore St., (215) 667-8298, nlg-maryland.org, free. THE I.E. READING SERIES. Poets Cathy Eisenhower, Mel Nichols, and Rod Smith read from their work. 8 P.M., Load Of Fun Studios, 120 W. North Ave., (410) 7271953, loadoffun.net. DAVID LEVERING LEWIS. The author and historian will be signing copies of his books. 12:30 P.M., Barnes & Noble - Johns Hopkins, 3330 St. Paul St., (410) 6625850, free. LITERARY CABARET. The Association of Writers and Writing Programs celebrate the intersection of writing

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and music. 7-10 P.M., Frazier’s on the Avenue, 919 W. 36th St., (410) 662-4914, fraziersontheavenue.com, $15. THE PRATT’S BOOKLOVERS’ BREAKFAST. Library’s 21st anniversary celebration featuring award-winning authors Nikki Giovanni and James McBride. 8:30 A.M., Baltimore Waterfront Marriott, 700 Aliceanna St., (410) 385-3000, $40. PUBLICATION PARTY FOR THE PHYSICS OF LOUNGING . Poetry by Elizabeth Champney, A. M. Chaplin, Sylvia Gillett, Terry Hilt, and Pamela Di Pesa. 5 P.M., Minas Gallery, 815 W. 36th St., (410) 732-4258, minasgalleryandboutique.com, free.

Mosaic Lounge, 4 Market Place, (410) 262-8713, mosaiclounge.com, $75, $65 advance, VIP $100.

SATURDAY 7

JABARI ASIM. Meet the author of What Obama Means. 6:30 P.M., Enoch Pratt Free Library, central library, 400 Cathedral St., (410) 396-5430, prattlibrary.org/locations, free.

EL RANCHO GRANDE BENEFIT/ANNIVERSARY SHOW. Benefit to sustain coffee house and art gallery. Artists include Wye Oak, Caleb Stine, Ellen Cherry, Timothy Bracken, Andrew Grimm, Stephen Strohmeier, Katie Feild, MacGregor Burns and the VCR, Kathy Fahey, and Young Sir Jim. 8-11 P.M., Metro Gallery, 1700 N. Charles St., themetrogallery.net, $20. FIESTA TROPICAL. Fundraising festival with musical entertainment, fine cuisine, free drinks, and silent auction. Benefits Casa Baltimore/Limay. 7 P.M., St. Johns Church, 2640 St. Paul St., (240) 372-7324, casabaltimorelimay.org, $35, couples $60, ages 6-12 $15, advance: $25, couples $45, ages 6-12 $10, children 5 and under free. PINUPS FOR PITBULLS FUNDR AISER AND VAUDEVILLE NIGHT. Burlesque and vaudeville night to benefit Pinups for Pitbulls organization. 10 P.M., Angels Rock Bar, 10 Market Place, (410) 528-1999, angelsrockbarbaltimore.com, $10. RADIO ONE AND AMERICAN RED CROSS HOST 300-PINT COMMUNITY BLOOD DRIVE. Donate blood and help save lives. Also takes place at Skateworks Inc., 1716 White Head Road in Woodlawn. Please call or hit the web site to make an appointment. 10 A.M.-4 P.M., Frederick Douglass High School, 2301 Gwynns Falls Parkway, (800) 448-3543, myredcross.org, free.

TUESDAY 10

SUNDAY 8

FOLLOW THE BUFFALO WRITING WORKSHOP. A critique-style writing workshop for writers and any with a taste for critique. 8-11 P.M., El Rancho Grandé, 3608 Falls Road, (443) 977-8716, myspace.com/itsabigranch. FULL SENTENCES: POETRY AND OPEN DISCUSSION. Hosted by Mr. Keep On Moving with DJ G-Nice. Open mic sign up at 8 P.M. New Haven Lounge, 1552 Havenwood Road, (410) 203-3295, newhavenlounge. net, $10 . THE GWYNNS FALLS - BALTIMORE GREENWAY TO THE CHESAPEAKE BAY. A discussion of the new book by W. Edward Orser with contributions by Daniel Bain, Jack Breihan, Guy W. Hager, Eric Holcomb and David Terry. 7 P.M., Red Emma’s Bookstore and Coffeehouse, 800 St. Paul St., (410) 230-0450, redemmas.org.

CENTERSTAGE RADIO AUCTION. Annual WBAL A.M. 1090 radio auction broadcast to raise money for Centerstage theater, sponsored by The Baltimore Sun. 8 A.M.-midnight, Centerstage, 700 N. Calvert St., (410) 332-0033, centerstage.org.

BENEFITS

LIBERAL DRINKING CLUB. The Baltimore Chapter of Drinking Liberally meets on the second and fourth Wednesdays of each month to share some drinks and ideas. 7 P.M., Joe Squared, 133 W. North Ave., (410) 727-8815, joesquared.com. THE TRAIL OF DREAMS WORLD PEACE WALK. The Trail of Dreams World Peace Walkers arrive in Baltimore for a five-day series of events hosted by local organizations, libraries, and schools. The Peace Walk starts at Coppin Sate and walks to the National Great Blacks in Wax Museum. Coppin State University, 2500 W. North Ave., (410) 951-3800, coppin.edu, trailofdreamsworldpeacewalk.com, free.

SUNDAY 8 2ND SUNDAY READING SERIES. With the Raga Celtic Delta Blues Band, Barbara DeCesare, Chris Toll, Mark Coburn, Steve Weaver, and Julie Fisher. 4 P.M., Minas Gallery, 815 W. 36th St., (410) 732-4258, minasgalleryandboutique.com, $3. C. FRASER SMITH. Author discusses and signs new book, Here Lies Jim Crow: Civil Rights in Maryland. 2-4 P.M., Jewish Museum of Maryland, 15 Lloyd St., (410) 732-6400, jewishmuseummd.org, $5, JMM, NAACP, and Baltimore Hebrew University students free.

MONDAY 9

THURSDAY 5 THE 18TH ANNUAL CHOCOLATE AFFAIR. Over 50 of Baltimore’s restaurants, caterers and chocolatiers are serving sweets at this business/ cocktail event. Benefits Health Care for the Homeless. 6-9:30 P.M., M&T Bank Stadium, 1101 Russell St., (443) 703-1396, chocolateaffair.org, $85, $75 advance, $140 couples in advance, $150 Chocolate Angel with VIP pre-event reception at 5:30 P.M.

COMMUNITY ACTION THURSDAY 5 VOLUNTEER CAFE. Learn about volunteer opportunities throughout the Greater Baltimore area from five local nonprofit organizations. 6-7:30 P.M., Teavolve Harbor East, 1401 Aliceanna St., (410) 522-1907, teavolve.com.

WEDNESDAY 11

FRIDAY 6

SPECIAL EVENTS

BMOREFREE FUNDRAISER. Raise money for Baltimore Free Store operating expenses. Live bands include Spoke Ensemble and MacGregor Burns. 7-11 P.M., 2640 Space, 2640 St. Paul St., redemmas.org, minimum donation $10. CATCH (THE PARTY). Open bar, silent auction, and singles. Benefits the Casey Cares foundation. 7-11 P.M.,

BALTIMORE SOCIETY OF MODEL ENGINEERS. Large model trains, permanent display of real trains, operating trains, and photographs. 1-5 P.M. Feb. 8, Baltimore Society of Model Engineers, 225 W. Saratoga St., (410) 837-2763, modelengineers.com, donations. “BEHIND-THE-SCENES” VIEW OF WALTERS’ CONSERVATION LAB. A “behind-the-scenes” look

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at a conservation studio. 11 A.M.-noon and 12:30-4 P.M. Fridays-Sundays, Walters Art Museum, 600 N. Charles St., (410) 547-9000, thewalters.org. BROMO SELTZER ARTS TOWER OPEN STUDIO DAY. Local and regional artists showcase their original works; guests can also meet the artists and visit their studios. 1-5 P.M. Feb. 7, Bromo Seltzer Arts Tower, 21 S. Eutaw St., (443) 874-3596, bromoseltzerartstower. com. CA STUDIOS OPEN HOUSE. Art, performance, and screenings by resident artists. Pasta dinner is on sale along with $2 wine and beer. 7-10 P.M. Feb. 6, Creative Alliance at the Patterson, 3134 Eastern Ave., (410) 2761651, creativealliance.org, free. DR. SKETCHY’S ANTI-ART SCHOOL. Burlesque life drawing event featuring costumed models, booze, and crazy contests. Bring your own sketch materials. 7-10 P.M. Feb. 9, Dionysus Restaurant and Lounge, 8 E. Preston St., (410) 244-1020, myspace.com/dionysusbar, drsketchysbaltimore.wordpress.com, $7. 14TH ANNUAL BL ACK HERITAGE ART SHOW. Largest art event in the Mid-Atlantic Region during Black History Month. Feb. 6, Baltimore Convention Center, 1 W. Pratt St., (410) 649-7000, blackheritageartshow.com, $8. KNITTING JAM. Interactive experience that sets off Laure Drogoul’s Apparatus for Orchestral Knitting installation. 6-9:30 P.M. Feb. 6, Maryland Institute College of Art, Decker and Meyerhoff galleries, 1303 W. Mount Royal Ave., (410) 225-2300, mica.edu, free. MEMORIES OF EUBIE: REMEMBERING THE PAST BY CULTIVATING THE FUTURE. Eubie is best known for his accomplishments as a composer, lyricist and pianist of ragtime, jazz and popular music. 3-5 P.M. Feb. 8, Eubie Blake Jazz Institute and Cultural Center, 847 N. Howard St., (410) 225-3130, eubieblake.org, $10 recommended donation. ROMANCE OF THE ROSE FIRST FRIDAY. Celebrate the upcoming Valentine’s Day holiday with music, cocktails, and live performances. 5-8 P.M. Feb. 6, Walters Art Museum, 600 N. Charles St., (410) 547-9000, thewalters.org, free. WAVERLY FARMERS’ MARKET. 7 A.M.-noon Saturdays, Waverly’s Farmer Market, E. 32nd and Barclay streets, 32ndstreetmarket.org, free. WHOLE FOODS MARKET’S CHOCOL ATE FEST. Sample chocolate treats for Valentine’s Day. 5-7 P.M. Feb. 11, Whole Foods Market, Harbor East, 1001 Fleet St., (410) 528-1640, free. WINTER RESTAURANT WEEK. More than 90 restaurants are offering great dining deals throughout town: 3-course dinners $30.09 and 3-course lunches $20.09. Through Feb. 8. Various , Restaurants, (877) 225-8466, baltimorerestaurantweek.com.

TALKS PLUS WEDNESDAY 4 BALTIMORE DESIGN CONVERSATION. 6:30 P.M., the Windup Space, 10-12 W. North Ave., (410) 244-8855, thewindupspace.com.

THURSDAY 5 GLASSBLOWING WORKSHOP. Make a Valentine heart paperweight at a wine and cheese event for adults. 6-9 P.M., Corradetti Glass Studio, 2010 Clipper Park Road, (410) 243-2010, corradetti.com, $60. IGNITE BALTIMORE NO. 2. Cities all over the world are organizing Ignite events, where thought leaders come together to share what they know and make new connections. 6 P.M., the Windup Space, 10-12 W. North Ave., (410) 244-8855, thewindupspace.com, ignitebaltimore. com/speakers, free.


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BALTIMORE WEEKLY TALK P LUS

CONTI NUED

KIDS

WEDNESDAY 11

SATURDAY 7

AFRICAN-YORUBA CULTURE, L ANGUAGE, AND SPIRITUALITY LECTURE. 4-5:15 P.M., Yoruba Institute of Culture, 1707 Wilmington Ave., (443) 759-9493, yorubainstituteofculture.org, registration fee $10, class fee $25. ANCIENT EGYPT RESEARCH SYMPOSIUM. “Preserving Egyptian Cultural Heritage” is an afternoon event consisting of three lectures dealing with the preservation of Ancient Egypt’s art and monuments. 2-5 P.M., Walters Art Museum, 600 N. Charles St., (410) 547-9000, thewalters.org, free. CELEBRATE THE 100TH ANNIVERSARY OF THE NAACP. Marvin “Doc” Cheatham, the president of the Baltimore City chapter of the NAACP, discuss the history of the organization. 2-3 P.M., Reginald F. Lewis Museum of Maryland African American History and Culture, 830 E. Pratt St., (410) 767-0473, africanamericanculture.org, free with admission. MODERN MANUSCRIPTS TEACHER WORKSHOP. Exploration of the modern applications of traditional manuscript methods. 9 A.M.-12:30 P.M., Walters Art Museum, 600 N. Charles St., (410) 547-9000, thewalters.org, $20, members, and students $15. “PRIVATE AND PRIVIES, TOILETRIES AND TEA.” Living history presentation by re-enactor and social historian Dory Gean Cunningham. 12:15 P.M., Johns Hopkins University, Homewood Campus, 3400 N. Charles St., free with museum admission. VALENTINE HEART PAPERWEIGHT GLASSBLOWING. Learn how to create a glass paperweight with your Valentine. 11 A.M.-2 P.M., Corradetti Glass Studio, 2010 Clipper Park Road, (410) 243-2010, corradetti.com, $47.

CREATIVE CONNECTS. Networking event for advertising, marketing, creative, web and public relations professionals hosted by the Boss Group. 5:30-8 P.M., Mex, 26 Market Place, (410) 528-0128, free.

SCREENS THURSDAY 5 ADVANCED SCREENWRITING WORKSHOP. Take your full or partial screenplay; with Aaron Gentzler. 7-9:30 P.M., Creative Alliance at the Patterson, 3134 Eastern Ave., (410) 276-1651, creativealliance.org, series $160, CA members $145.

SUNDAY 8 IMMORTAL CUPBOARD: IN SEARCH OF LORINE NIEDECKER. A CAmm indie premiere of the Cathy Cook 2008 documentary about Wisconsin poet and experimental writer Lorine Niedecker (1903-1970). Q and A follows. 3 P.M., Creative Alliance at the Patterson, 3134 Eastern Ave., (410) 276-1651, creativealliance.org, $10, members $8.

MONDAY 9 CINEMA MONDAY ’S DOUBLE FEATURE NIGHT. Robocop (1987) and Battle Royale (2001). 8 P.M., Talking Head, 407 E. Saratoga St., (410) 207-8011, talkingheadclub.com, free.

WEDNESDAY 4 DISNEY ON ICE: A DISNEYL AND ADVENTURE . Follow the Incredibles on their fun-filled vacation to Disneyland. 7:30 P.M., also Thursday-Sunday, 1st Mariner Arena, 201 W. Baltimore St., (410) 347-2020, baltimorearena.com, $14-$55. EDUCATAINMENT. Storyteller Bunjo Butler retells stories in the traditional African-American oral tradition. 1 P.M., Enoch Pratt Free Library, Clifton Branch, 2001 N. Wolfe St., (410) 396-0984, prattlibrary.org/ locations/clifton, free.

THURSDAY 5 THIRFTY THURSDAY. Enjoy a discount admission of $6 from 1-4:30 P.M. Port Discovery, 35 Market Place, (410) 727-8120, portdiscovery.org.

FRIDAY 6 MEET THE AUTHOR. Meet Carol Boston Weatherford, author of Becoming Billie Holiday and I, Matthew Henson. 10:30 A.M., Enoch Pratt Free Library, central library, 400 Cathedral St., (410) 396-5430, free. 1 P.M., Enoch Pratt Free Library, Light Street branch, 1251 Light St., (410) 396-1096, prattlibrary.org/locations/lightstreet, free SPECIAL STORY TIME. A Beatrix Potter-themed story time with Peter Rabbit. 11:30 A.M., Barnes and Noble, 601 E. Pratt St., (410) 385-2086, bn.com, free.

SATURDAY 7 CIRQUE DE LA SYMPHONIE. Stunning aerial feats, strong-men, mind-boggling contortionists and juggling acts will take your breath away as the Baltimore Symphony Orchestra performs orchestral hits for kids ages 7 and up. 11 A.M., Meyerhoff Symphony Hall, 1212 Cathedral St., (410) 783-8000, baltimoresymphony. org, $12-$20. DROP-IN ART ACTIVITIES: THE LUCK OF THE DRAGON. Celebrate Chinese New Year with dragon sculptures, good luck gifts, and shadow puppets. 10 A . M .-3 P . M ., also Sunday, Walters Art Museum, 600 N. Charles St., (410) 547-9000, thewalters.org. HEALTHY FIRST SATURDAY. Healthy events for kids, including Cook and Tell at 1 and 2 P . M ., Kinderfit-Wellness Songs for Healthy Kids with the Kindersinger at 1:30 and 2 P.M., and FUN Drum Rhythm Circle at 1 and 1:30 P .M. Port Discovery, 35 Market Place, (410) 727-8120, portdiscovery.org. IMAGINE OUR ANCESTORS: CHILDREN HEROES OF THE CIVIL RIGHTS MOVEMENT. Traveling troupe Imagine Our Ancestors tells stories of three children that made an impact in the Civil Rights Movement followed by a workshop making booklets. 3-4 P.M., Reginald F. Lewis Museum of Maryland African American History and Culture, 830 E. Pratt St., (410) 767-0473, africanamericanculture.org, $8, seniors and students $6, children 6 and under free. VALENTINE’S DAY EVENT. Story time, activities, and a music by Chris Modell. Refreshments included. 10:30 A.M., Barnes and Noble, 601 E. Pratt St., (410) 385-2086, bn.com, free.

SUNDAY 8

TAKE BACK WYPR FORUM AND DISCUSSION WITH MARC STEINER. The Take Back WYPR organizers and Marc Steiner discuss public radio with interested community members. 6 P.M., 2640 Space, 2640 St. Paul St., redemmas.org, free, but donations welcome. “THE HARLEM RENAISSANCE.” Celebrate Black History Month with a 90-minute presentation with Jacqueline Copeland on the arts, literature, music, and films of the Harlem Renaissance, primarily 1919-1935. 2 P.M., Walters Art Museum, 600 N. Charles St., (410) 547-9000, thewalters.org, free.

WEDNESDAY 11 2ND WEDNESDAYS AT THE VLP. This month, Jeff Larry, Preservation Officer at President Lincoln’s Cottage in Washington, will speak. A reception will precede the presentation. 7-9 P.M., the Village Learning Place, 2521 St. Paul St., (410) 235-2210, free.

BUSINESS SATURDAY 7

FEDERAL HILL’S NETWORKING SOIREE. “Style List”networking soiree for designer, stylist, models, and boutique owners. 4-7 P.M., Rajah Designs Boutique and Style Lounge, 1003 Light St., (410) 244-5595, rajahdesigns.com/stylelist_big.jpg, free, RSVP required.

SUNDAY 8 GROUP SUPPORT FOR JOB SEEKERS. Stress reduction and support offered through guided meditation and group discussion. 8:30-10:30 A.M., breathe books, 810 W 36th St., (410) 467-0842, breathebooks.com.

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FEBRUARY 4, 2009

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GET IN ON IGNITE BALTIMORE NO. 2 AT THE WINDUP SPACE FEB. 5.


BALTIMORE WEEKLY

SUNDAY 8 AFRICAN-AMERICAN HISTORY MONTH FAMILY DAY. With performances by DishiBem Traditional Contemporary Dance Group and Illstyle and Peace Productions, guided tours, painting and drawing, and Debra Mims’grand tales. 1-5 P.M.,Baltimore Museum of Art, 10 Art Museum Drive, (443) 573-1700, artbma.org, free.

MONDAY 9 MEET THE AUTHOR. Meet Carol Boston Weatherford, author of Becoming Billie Holiday and I, Matthew Henson. 1 P.M., Enoch Pratt Free Library, Herring Run branch, 3801 Erdman Ave., (410) 396-0996, prattlibrary. org/locations/herringrun, free.

TUESDAY 10 CHILDREN’S STORY TIME. Featuring old favorites and modern classics. 10:30 A.M., Barnes & Noble - Johns Hopkins, 3330 St. Paul St., (410) 662-5850, free.

HEALTH & FITNESS

Yoga Village, 3000 Chestnut Ave. #15, (410) 662-8626, baltimoreyogavillage.com. TRADITIONAL JAPANESE SHOTOKAN KARATE-DO. Near Johns Hopkins Homewood campus in the church hall. 5:30-7 P.M., also Tuesdays, St. John’s Episcopal Church, 3009 Greenmount Ave., (410) 560-2838.

FRIDAY 6 GREAT SOUL ANNIVERSARY WEEKEND. Free wellness treatments and classes at Great Soul Wellness Studio in celebration of their one year anniversary. 5:30 P.M., also Saturday and Sunday, Great Soul Wellness Studio, 4711 Harford Road, (410) 652-0499, greatsoulwellness.com, free. NATIONAL BLACK HIV/AIDS AWARENESS DAY. Bon Secours Baltimore Health System, Total Health Care, Inc., and United Healthcare cosponsor this event. Program includes special guests, health, and wellness info, free screenings, refreshments, entertainment, give-aways, and door prizes. 3-7 P.M., Mondawmin Mall, 2401 Liberty Heights Ave, (410) 728-6642, free.

SATURDAY 7

WEDNESDAY 4 CLUTTER-ERS ANONYMOUS 12 STEP MEETING. 7-8 P.M., Faith Community United Methodist Church of Hamilton, 5315 Harford Road, free. GENTLE YOGA FOR EVERY SIZED BODY. 6:10-7:30 P.M., Avalon Yoga Studio, 15 Mellor Ave., Catonsville, (410) 869-9771, avalonyogastudio.com. HAPPY FEET GUIDED MOVEMENT CIRCLE. 7-8 P.M., the Living Well, 2122 St. Paul St., (410) 764-7322.

THURSDAY 5 PRE-NATAL YOGA. 5-6:15 P.M., Charm City Yoga Fells Point, 901 Fell St., (310) 276-9642, charmcityyoga.com, $15 drop-in, $70 for 5 classes, $125 for 10 classes. SUGAR BLUES WELLNESS WORKSHOP. 7-8:30 P.M., Meadow Mill Athletic Club, 3600 Clipper Mill Road, (410) 935-6512, $10, members free. TRADITIONAL HATHA YOGA. 9:30-11 A.M., Baltimore

BEGINNER YOGA. 9:30-10:45 A . M ., Ojas Wellness Center, Mount Washington, 1501 Sulgrave Ave., suite 103, (443) 722-0189, ojaswellness.com, $18 drop-in. INTRODUCTION TO THE INCAN MEDICINE WHEEL. 1 P.M., breathe books, 810 W 36th St., (410) 235-7323, breathebooks.com, $60.

SUNDAY 8 HEART HEALTH FAIR FOR FAMILIES. Cooking demonstrations, food sampling, health screenings, music, and family activities. Noon-4 P.M., Reginald F. Lewis Museum of Maryland African American History and Culture, 830 E. Pratt St., (410) 328-8919, africanamericanculture.org, free. RED DRESS SUNDAY. Wear red to raise awareness about heart disease. Visit sistersheart.org to find participating churches. (410) 243-3790. VINYASA FLOW YOGA CL ASS. 10-11:30 A . M ., the Healing Path, 37 E. Cross St, (410) 637-3760, thehealingpath.com, $15.

ACADEMY AWARD ★ NOMINEES ★

®

BEST ACTOR ★ MICKEY ROURKE BEST SUPPORTING ★ MARISA TOMEI ACTRESS

MONDAY 9 REIKI CIRCLE. Interested practitioners can contact Mary Bontempo at reikimastermarybontempo@ yahoo.com. 7 P.M., breathe books, 810 W 36th St., (410) 235-7323, breathebooks.com, donation. TAI CHI CLASSES. For health and relaxation. 7:45 P.M., St. Johns Church, 2640 St. Paul St., (410) 296-4944. TAI CHI FOR SENIOR CITIZENS. For health and relaxation. 12:30 P.M., Senior Network of North Baltimore, 5828 York Road, (410) 323-7131.

TUESDAY 10 CO-DEPENDENTS ANONYMOUS. 8-9:15 P.M., Church of the Redeemer, 5603 Charles St., (410) 262-2223, free. LARGELY POSITIVE. A support group to promote a healthy lifestyle and build self-esteem for adults of size. Meetings take place at 5710 Newbury St. Contact D. Kauffmann at (410) 982-9667 or healthateverysize@ comcast.net. 7-8:30 P.M., free. YOUNG WINDOWED PERSONS/LIFE PARTNER GRIEF SUPPORT GROUP. 6:30-8 P.M., Gilchrist Center for Hospice Care, 6601 N. Charles St., (443) 849-8200, free.

WEDNESDAY 11 CAREGIVERS SUPPORT GROUP. 6-7:15 P.M., Johns Hopkins Bayview Medical Center, 4940 Eastern Avenue, (410) 550-0270, free.

SPORTS & RECREATION

Co-ed adult kickball divisions in Federal Hill and Canton now signing up. Spring season starts March 11. 7-10 P.M., Mother’s Federal Hill Grille, 1113 S. Charles St., (410) 244-8686, mothersgrille.com, kick-ballbaltimore.com. TWILIGHT CANOE ESCAPE. Call at least 24 hours in advance; recommended for ages 7 and up. 6 P.M., Middle Branch Park, 3301 Waterview Ave., (410) 3960440, $5.

THURSDAY 5

KICKBALL LEAGUE OF BALTIMORE SIGN-UPS. Coed adult kickball divisions in Federal Hill and Canton now signing up. Spring season starts March 11. 7-10 P.M., Looney’s Pub, 2900 O’Donnell St., (410) 675-9235, looneyspub.com, kick-ball-baltimore.com.

FRIDAY 6

BABE’S BIRTHDAY BASH. Come celebrate Babe Ruth’s birthday with food and drinks included and special guests Coach Ralph Friedgen, Ernie Graham, Katie Hoff, and many more. 5 P.M., Sports Legends at Camden Yards, 301 W. Camden St., (410) 727-1539, $60, $55 advance, members $40. SENIOR FRIENDLY FRIDAYS. With activities like water aerobics, line dancing, performers, art lessons, and more. 11 A.M.-4 P.M., Patterson Park Recreation Center, 2601 E.Baltimore Street, (410) 396-9156, pattersonpark. com/Activities/recreationcenter.html.

SATURDAY 7

MORNING CANOE ESCAPE. Pre-registration required at least 24 hours in advance; for ages 7 and up. 10 A.M., Middle Branch Park, 3301 Waterview Ave., (410) 396-0440, $5.

WEDNESDAY 4 AN EVENING WITH CAL RIPKEN AND EDDIE MURRAY. Enjoy a “fireside chat” with Ripken and Murray hosted by Baltimore broadcaster Scott Garceau. Each guest will receive a large signed photograph of the two former Orioles. The evening will include a cocktail reception and bar. 6-9 P.M., Sports Legends at Camden Yards, 301 W. Camden St., (410) 727-1539, $500. KICKBALL LEAGUE OF BALTIMORE SIGN-UPS.

SUNDAY 8

VELOCIPEDE SUNDAY SHOP. Shop gives old bikes an extreme build-over when volunteers gather to get these bad boys up, running, and ready for resale at moderate prices. 2-6 P.M., Velocipede Bike Project, 4 W. Lanvale St., velocipedebikeproject.org, monthly membership $33 or three volunteer hours.■

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REVIVALS!

Band of Outsiders Harvard Beats Yale 29-29 (1964 Jean-Luc Godard) • Thu 2/5 9pm Revolutionary Road A Woman As A Woman Slumdog Millionaire (1961 Jean-Luc Godard) Milk Sat 2/7 Noon • Mon 2/9 7PM Last Chance Harvey (ends 2/5) Rachel Getting Married (ends 2/5) Best Film Series - CP 2007 1711 NORTH CHARLES STREET | LOBBY & THEATRE AVAILABLE FOR PARTIES & EVENTS citypaper.com

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FILM CLIPS

NEW THIS WEEK CORALINE Reviewed in this issue. Opens Feb. 6.

HE’S JUST NOT THAT INTO YOU Reviewed in this issue. Opens Feb. 6.

IMMORTAL CUPBOARD Cathy Cook’s mesmerizing, impressionistic biopic about 20th-century Wisconsin poet Lorine Niedecker is a musical visual poem all its own. Niedecker (1903-1970) spent most of her life living alone in rural Wisconsin, with her brain poured into books, all her sense attuned to the world around her, and her mind crafting shortly, gorgeous realized poetry about a place. An excellent marriage of form and subject. (Bret McCabe) At the Creative Alliance at the Patterson Feb. 8 at 3 P.M.

THE PINK PANTHER DEUX

THE PINK PANTHER DEUX Steve Martin returns as the bumbling Inspector Clouseau in this comedy that is hopefully better than the soulless first one. Not reviewed as of press time. Opens Feb. 6.

PUSH Dakota Fanning and Chris Evans star in this comic-bookish sci-fi thriller about telekinetic powers from director Paul McGuigan (Gangster No. 1, Lucky Number Slevin). Not reviewed as of press time. Opens Feb. 6. A WOMAN IS A WOMAN Stripper Angela (Anna Karina) wants to have a baby with her reluctant boyfriend Émile (Jean-Claude Brialy) in Jean-Luc Godard’s temperamentally self-aware 1961 drama, and considers turning to Alfred (Jean-Paul Belmondo) instead. A Woman is a Woman calls itself a “neorealist musical,” but it’s more an early experiment in Godard’s evolving pop and anti-pop sensibilities. The Michel Legrand score is as fragmented as the storytelling, the improvised dialog allusions are as fickle as the visual ones, and the pseudo-romantic storyline itself meanders—

even for a filmmaker as in love with the distracting tangent as Godard. As an early peek—Woman was Godard’s third feature—at a director’s evolving obsessions and filmmaking fits and starts, it’s rather provocative. (Bret McCabe) At the Charles Theatre at noon Feb. 7, at 7 P.M. Feb. 9, and 9 P.M. Feb. 12.

NOW IN THEATERS BEDTIME STORIES Disney’s latest live-action feature is a typically wide-eyed, PG-rated family flick about magic and imagination. Bedtime Stories charms with its inventive fantasy premise, as the stories Skeeter (Adam Sandler) tells his niece and nephew begin mysteriously coming true, and it’s to the movie’s credit that it expends no energy trying to explain or justify the fantasy device. At its best, not even cheap CGI or the most contrived speech impediment in child actor history can stall the flick, and Brit comic Russell Brand (Forgetting Sarah Marshall), though also accustomed to working blue, easily outshines Sandler in a small supporting role. (AS) BRIDE WARS Liv (Kate Hudson) and Emma (Ann Hathaway), friends since they were children, live and love in New York. When they each get engaged, first, they scream, and, second, they take a meeting with wedding planner queen bitch Marion St. Claire (Candice Bergen.) After dress shopping and buying every wedding magazine published, they discover their June weddings at the Plaza—which they have dreamed about, like, forever—erroneously got booked on the, gasp, same day. Their relationship suffers tension so thick you could cut it with a silver-plated knife wrapped with a colored silk bow and they break up. They fight dirty and mastermind sneak attacks on the other’s special day and take it all seriously so we don’t have to. (WW) THE CURIOUS CASE OF BENJAMIN BUTTON David Why doesn’t this movie click? Is it because director David Fincher excels at decrepitude, and Benjamin Button (Brad Pitt) has the opposite problem? Born a geriatric bundle of wrinkles and abandoned at an oldfolks home, he’s adopted by the home’s resident caretaker (Taraji P. Henson) and reared among his pinochle-playing, afternoon-napping peers. Only he’s not their peer, since as he grows, he gains back the things they’ve lost, such as his hearing and hairline, and he becomes curious about things—especially the bewitching red-haired girl Daisy (Elle Fanning) who comes to visit her grandmother. These early scenes work, but as Daisy and Benjamin’s romance progresses, it dawns

on you: This is Forrest Gump all over again. (VG) DEFIANCE The true story of a group of Jews who take refuge in the woods of Poland during World War II, Defiance pretty much comes down to Jews with guns. In 1941, after their families are killed by invading Nazis, the Bielskis—clearheaded Tuvia (Daniel Craig), hotheaded Zus (Liev Schreiber), Asael (Jamie Bell), the one who becomes a man in the woods, and Aron (George MacKay), the little one who doesn’t do much—hole up in a Belarus forest. They soon discover other Jews hiding there. But Defiance isn’t a meditative WWII piece. It’s an action flick with revenge on its mind and an explosion-packed survival story disguised as a triumph of the spirit—although it makes it all look so tidy and easy. (MG)

DOUBT DOUBT In 1964 Sister Aloysius (Meryl Streep) is the nun of everyone’s nightmare. As a paranoid, rulerwielding principal, she’s snooping preemptively into the dark spaces of everyone around her. And the worst thing is that she’s usually right. Father Flynn (Philip Seymour Hoffman) is a walking can of worms, a charismatic priest with many cute middle-school altar boys to distract him. Sister Aloysius is determined to open him up, even though there’s no evidence that he’s actually been doing anything untoward. It’s a rare opportunity to watch two alpha actors duke it out without having to get in bed with one another. So goes the movie itself: an extended, polished, and creepy voyage into the Church’s moment of self-examination. (JB) FROST/NIXON Ron Howard directing a Peter Morgan script should be a home run. Morgan revels in the talky machinations of power brokering and Howard is at his best when dramatizing the behind-the-scenes wonk work of events’ public faces. Morgan adapted

his own play for the screen, and this story about the 1977 series of interviews between British television host David Frost (Michael Sheen) and former U.S. President Richard Nixon (Frank Langella) should be the sort of background glimpse that floats right through Howard’s wheelhouse. The problem is that Howard forgets that these interviews are inescapably about the two men at the center of the spectacle. Fortunately, two performances power the movie, which maintains the play’s boxing match pacing. Frost/Nixon tries to build up an artificial tension out of this grafted-on pugilism, but it eventually settles into a familiar yarn about David slaying Goliath. (BM) At Landmark Harbor East. GRAN TORINO Walt Kowalski (Clint Eastwood) is an implacable Korean War veteran and retired autoworker mourning the recent death of his wife. He doesn’t really understand the modern American society that has, it seems, suddenly sprung up around his neighborhood in the guise of the Hmong families, who represent the new face of his block. When a straight-laced Hmong boy from next door, Thao (Bee Vang), is bullied by his gangbanger cousin into trying to steal Walt’s pristine ’72 Ford Gran Torino, it sets off a chain of events that leads Walt and Thao’s family into the arena of uneasy friendship. What these characters share is an ability to fill the voids left by absent— emotionally or physically—sons and fathers. Whatever else Gran Torino is or isn’t, it’s at least a master class in the irascibility that Eastwood has perfected over his 50-plus years in showbiz. (RB) HARVARD BEATS YALE 29-29 In this documentary about the legendary 1968 Harvard vs. Yale football game, director Kevin Rafferty depicts the Harvard Crimson as hard-scrabble working-class underdogs and the Yale Bulldogs as a bunch of overconfident privileged legacies. Both entered the game undefeated, but Yale was favored. Rafferty mixes footage of the game with talking-head interviews with the players from both teams, and this format feels tired and uninspired. Made for Harvard and Yale alumni. (AD) At the Charles Theatre. HOTEL FOR DOGS An abandoned building that’s become home to a group of wayward canines, the “hotel” in director Thor Freudenthal’s feature-length debut is virtually a character in itself. That’s where Andi (Emma Roberts) and Bruce (Jake T. Austin), two young orphans, set up an assortment of contraptions that enable the dogs to entertain themselves in the absence of their surrogate owners. While it might seem like the perfect opportunity to use computer-generated graphics to show the dogs doing

“THE FIRST REAL ACTION FILM OF 2009! Mind-blowing! A must-see!”

–– Heather Heather Newgen, Newgen, COMINGSOON.NET COMINGSOON.NET

WRITTEN BY

DAVID BOURLA DIRECTEDBY PAUL MCGUIGAN

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FILM CLIPS an amazing array of tricks, that’s not the case here, as a group of professional dog trainers trained the creatures to strut their stuff without imposing too many human qualities. As a result, the movie’s unabashed charm—as well as the fact that not a single dog dies— distinguishes it from the slew of recent dog flicks. (JN) INKHEART Nine years ago, Mo Folchart (Brendan Fraser) discovered that he could bring literary characters to life simply by reading aloud from books. The price: for anyone he brings into our world, someone from ours has to vanish into the book. That’s how he lost his wife, and he and his daughter, Meggie (Eliza Hope Bennett), have been searching for a way to bring her back ever since, while trying to stay two steps ahead of the villainous Capricorn (Andy Serkis)-the first character Mo summoned. A fascinating premise for a movie, but the execution is dull and lacks any sense of fun. (CH)

What you missed...

“THE BEST DATE MOVIE OF THE SEASON!” –Mark S. Allen, CBS-TV

LAST THURSDAY AT

COLLEGE NIGHT

LAST CHANCE HARVEY Writer and director Joel Hopkins’ Last Chance Harvey follows two people already settled in lives unfinished who spend a day in London getting to know themselves. Pianoplaying jingle writer Harvey Shine (Hoffman) equally ignores his life and business. He’s given one last chance by his boss and cuts short a trip to London for his only child’s wedding ceremony in order to land an account. He leaves the wedding early, gets stuck in traffic, misses his flight, gets fired, knocks a few back in the airport bar, and catches the eye of lovely Kate Walker (Emma Thompson.) He talks to her with a boldness he hasn’t shown before; he’s got nothing left to lose. The two lunch in tandem, at separate tables, and have a chemistry that keeps them side-by-side through most of the rest of the movie. (WW)

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“‘UNDERWORLD: RISE OF THE LYCANS’ ”IS THE BEST OF THE SERIES!”

MADAGASCAR: ESCAPE 2 AFRICA This sequel opens with a Lion King homage, and then quickly picks up where the other Madagascar left off. The four animals—lion Alex (voiced by Ben Stiller), zebra Marty (Chris Rock), giraffe Melman (David Schwimmer), and hippo Gloria (Jada Pinkett Smith)—who were raised in captivity and pampered in a New York zoo are still stranded in the wild and want to go home. With the help of crossdressing, egomaniacal lemur King Julien (Sacha Baron Cohen), a pair of uppity monkeys, and a bunch of straight-talking, take-charge penguins, the stars board a broken-down plane destined for New York, a trip doomed from the start. You can guess how things turn out. (MG) At Beltway Movies 6.

SHOCKTILLYOUDROP.COM

MARLEY & ME The Marley & Me constructed by director David Frankel is conventional to the point of generic, a contemporary Norman Rockwell vision enlivened only by the eponymous dog and the chaos he leaves in his wake. John (Owen Wilson) and wife Jenny (Jennifer Aniston) are so bland, their challenges so commonplace, that they need the anarchy of the Labrador retriever who will not be tamed—or shamed—to shake them out of their comfort zone. But in adapting the bestselling 2005 memoir, screenwriters Scott Frank and Don Roos keep this exuberant dog on a very tight leash. (SD) MILK The first half of director Gus Van Sant’s moving portrait of assassinated activist Harvey Milk (Sean Penn), the first openly gay man elected to public office in the United States, is a fascinating mix of archival footage, historical re-enactment, and bravura acting.

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Don’t miss out this week! Check the ad on the Baltimore Weekly Highlights Page for this week’s event.

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FILM CLIPS

“THE BEST 3-D MOVIE I’VE EVER SEEN!” LEONARD MALTIN, ENTERTAINMENT TONIGHT

“WOW! AWESOME, AMAZING.” PETE HAMMOND, HOLLYWOOD.COM

It’s a disarmingly effective structure, juxtaposing the lead’s horrible fate against Van Sant’s irrepressibly lively picture of Milk moving from New York to San Francisco in 1970 with his partner (James Franco), opening a camera store, becoming a local activist for both gay and basic human rights, and his first few unsuccessful runs for public office. Once Milk enters public office it becomes a much more conventional movie; throughout, though, it’s anchored by Penn’s remarkably mimetic performance and Emile Hirsch’s even better Cleve Jones. Solid. (BM) At the Charles Theatre. MY BLOODY VALENTINE Praise the horror movie gods! My Bloody Valentine 3D makes murder and mayhem fun again, proving not all remakes have to suck. The script is a reasonably engaging “whodunit” that actually spends a little time on character development. Bloody also boasts a solid cast, including genre veteran Tom Atkins in a nice supporting role. It is unapologetically violent and includes a completely gratuitous nude scene, but unlike Saw and other recent so-called torture-porn horror, you won’t feel like you need to take a shower after you leave the theater. Horror fans should eat this one up like a box of chocolates. (RI) NEW IN TOWN Lucy Hill (Renee Zellweger) is on the fast track to a VP seat at her Miami-based corporation, but when she’s sent to New Ulm, Minn., to downsize and eventually shutter a union plant, she begins to question everything she believes about the value of the working man. En route, New in Town shamelessly plays to blue-collar families’ fears of corporate America’s seeming indifference to their survival. The filmmakers blatantly pander to slogans over substance, and as much as the movie argues that corporate America is evil, the solution it offers is that corporations are expected to be socialist, but the working men and women of America are not. (CH) NOTORIOUS Just who is this Notorious B.I.G. biopic for? Director George Tillman Jr. literally puts everything already known about the preternaturally gifted MC Christopher Wallace (Jamal Woolard, who has Biggie’s gentle grace, sense of humor, and goofy way with the ladies down) into a made-for-TV special: growing up a smart kid under the watchful eye of a single mother (Angela Bassett) in Brooklyn, turning to drug dealing early to make that cash, rapping on the side, doing a jail bid, honing his rhyme skills, and meeting up with Sean Combs in early ’90s New York to bring East Coast rap back to the top of the pops. And while Notorious is certainly faithful to how people remember this era, it never offers more insight into the MC than can’t be gleaned from close listenings to the two flawless albums he recorded before he was gunned down March 9, 1997. Pass. (BM)

STARTS FRIDAY, FEBRUARY 6TH SEE IT IN 3D! AMC COLUMBIA 14 AMC LOEWS WHITE MARSH 16 Mall of Columbia 410/423-0520 White Marsh Blvd. & I-95 N. 800/FANDANGO #738

MUVICO EGYPTIAN 24 At Arundel Mills 443/755-8992

ALSO PLAYING IN 2D AT THESE SELECT THEATRES! AMC OWINGS MILLS 17 10100 Mill Run Cir. 410/423-0520 FLAGSHIP CINEMAS CHURCHVILLE 7 Churchville Road, Bel Air 410/734-9000

NORTHEAST CINEMAS WEST NURSERY 14 Linthicum, MD 410/850-8999 REGAL CINEMAS EASTPOINT 10 7938 Eastern Blvd 800/FANDANGO #1734

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REGAL CINEMAS HUNT VALLEY STADIUM 12 11511 McCormick Rd. 800/FANDANGO #456 REGAL CINEMAS WESTMINSTER 9 400 N. Center St. 800/FANDANGO #458

UNITED ARTISTS MARLEY STATION 7900 Governor Ritchie Hwy. 800/FANDANGO #571 UNITED ARTISTS SNOWDEN SQUARE STADIUM 14 9161 Commerce Center Dr. 800/FANDANGO #570

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FEBRUARY 4, 2009

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PAUL BLART: MALL COP The titular loser is played by sitcom star Kevin James, and for its first half the picture relies on the delusional security guard’s power trips for laughs. But behind the silly mustache and the Segway he wheels around the shopping center, James is constitutionally incapable of coming across unlikable. So Blart’s inevitable transformation from underdog to hero, as he attempts to foil a robbery of the mall, feels more plausible than it should. And as James throws his rotund frame into action, Mall Cop transitions from mundane patrolling to exploding cop movie clichés almost as entertainingly as Hot Fuzz. One of the more tolerable lowbrow laughers in recent memory. (AS) RACHEL GETTING MARRIED Kym (Anne Hathaway)

is a recovering ex-model/addict let out of a serious rehab facility to attend the wedding of her sister Rachel (Mad Men’s Rosemarie DeWitt) to successful musician Sidney (TV on the Radio’s Tunde Adebimpe) at the clan’s sumptuous Connecticut country home. Working from Jenny Lumet’s fine script and fluidly visualized by the hyper-observant handheld DV work of Declan Quinn, Demme’s movie avoids recovery-film cliché—to the point that Kym’s AA meetings feel like an intrinsic part of some new American experience. Secrets are revealed and alliances tested, forged, and broken, and when finally we learn of a tragedy that’s been torturing Kym, as we realize its impossible weight, she morphs from annoyance to tragic sorta-heroine. This sounds like your typical solipsistically angsty indie, but it isn’t. (IG) At the Charles Theatre.

THE READER THE READER The Reader begins as a riddle, as an emotionally shut-off German attorney, Michael Berg (Ralph Fiennes), kicks a beautiful woman out of his apartment before the sight of a tram inexplicably takes him back to 1958. As a teenager Michael (David Kross) begins an illicit affair with a conductor named Hanna (Kate Winslet), a dominatrix who forces her young lover to read to her before she lets him touch her. Now, you assume that Hanna is responsible for the miserable adult Michael, but that’s part of the increasingly complex riddle that director Stephen Daldry weaves out of Bernhard Schlink’s best seller. The movie clunks across four decades as a meditation on Germany’s post-war conscience, but Daldry’s self-important direction turns The Reader turns into a smugly intellectual exercise. (CH) REVOLUTIONARY ROAD Screenwriter Justin Haythe and director Sam Mendes are so intent on hammering home the bleak message of Richard Yates’ source novel about an unhappy couple caught in the conformist suburbs that they make the hugely appealing Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet blank, bland, and blobby. The year is 1955; Frank (DiCaprio) and April (Winslet) Wheeler have been married for seven years, and they live in a white colonial house on a dead-end street called Revolutionary Road (note the heavyhanded symbolism typical of the book and movie.) Frank works, April cares for the home and two children, and they bridle at suburban conformity. But it’s not easy to film a satire of suburban monotony when your movie becomes as tedious as your target. (GH) SEVEN POUNDS What is IRS agent Ben Thomas (Will Smith) doing harassing a blind salesman (Woody Harrelson) in the opening minutes? What interest does Thomas have in the attractive Emily (Rosario Dawson) he tracks to a Los Angeles hospital? What is the plan Thomas asks his longtime friend (Barry Pepper) to stick to? As all these puzzle pieces start to fall into place over the first half of the movie, that other question looms: Why? Director Gabriele Mucc ino (T he Pursuit of Happyness) fills in the big picture in small patch-


FILM CLIPS

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es dotted with innocuously obvious clues until a larger whole emerges. And while it’s a somewhat effective device , it’s still manipulative and shallow. Penitence porn. (BM) At Beltway Movies 6. SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE The Muslim Jamal (Dev Patel) has defied his violent youth and grown into a soft-spoken, gentle 18-year-old who, in the opening sequence, has just answered the penultimate question on India’s version of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire? His seemingly triumphant moment is juxtaposed against his torture that night by the local police, who presume an uneducated “slumdog� could not have survived the show without cheating, and they want to know how. Jamal’s response is the movie’s story, as he explains each of his answers and how his tragic life experiences provided him with them. Director Danny Boyle has always opted for protagonists who have placed more value on their life experiences than books and Slumdog is no different, but compared to his earlier works, it just doesn’t measure up. (CH) TAKEN Liam Neeson shoots, beats, maims, stabs, cons, tortures, and otherwise kills a seemingly endless stream of bad guys on his way through Paris’ sex-trafficking underground to save his daughter in this Luc Besson-produced action thriller directed by Pierre Morel. As an action flick, it’s a decidedly reactionary and rote exercise in the sort of moral superiority in a foreign land more indicative of a previous presidential administration. As saucily overcooked melodrama, though, Taken’s expressing a father’s undying love for his daughter as a homicidal rampage is a real hoot. (BM) TWILIGHT Director Catherine Hardwicke and screenwriter Melissa Rosenberg ruin the perfectly beautiful magic of Stephenie Meyers’ book, and even the most aflutter young nerdlette who swoons into the theater to see Edward Cullen (Robert Pattinson) lustily, but chastely, work his vampire magic on distraught young Bella (Kristen Stewart) will be sorely disappointed in this astonishingly horrible movie. Twilight is so leaden with angsty melodrama that by its midpoint, Bella’s incessant sighing, Edward’s awkward stoicism, and their utter lack of onscreen chemistry has become so ridiculous that you have to laugh. Unfortunately, the midpoint is an hour in. Oh, did I neglect to mention the whole vampire thing? So did the filmmakers. (JF) At Beltway Movies 6. THE UNBORN In The Unborn, writer/director David S. Goyer delivers something like the Jewish version of The Exorcist. He isn’t above stealing random scenes from just about every other horror movie he can think of either. The basic plot concerns college student Casey Beldon (Odette Yustman), who discovers that a nasty spirit called a dybbuk is trying to take possession of her. For some unexplained reason, this is hard for the demon to do, even though it has no problem possessing other cast members, some of whom have their heads spin around just like Linda Blair. You’ll feel like your head is about to spin around, too, as you try to make sense of this mess. (RI) UNDERWORLD: RISE OF THE LYCANS Director Patrick Tatopolous makes this prequel to the previous two Underworld movies seem like some kind of Holocaust drama. Not that a movie about werewolves rising up against their cruel vampire masters can’t or shouldn’t play it straight, but it requires a deft touch that Tatopolous lacks. So when the movie awkwardly becomes an allegory for real-life race relations, it’s hard to know whether to laugh or be appalled as head vam-

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Thursday, February 12th

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UNDERWORLD 3: RISE OF THE LYCANS pire Viktor (Bill Nighy) calls werewolf Lucian (Michael Sheen) a credit to his race. Series star Kate Beckinsale wisely passed on this nonsense. Instead, we get Rhona Mitra as female vampire (and Viktor’s daughter) Sonja, and she’s every bit as wooden here as she was in last year’s Doomsday. The first two films in the series weren’t great, but at least they offered up some fun and excitement. (RI) VALKYRIE “We have to show the world that not all of us are like him,� vows Colonel Claus von Stauffenberg (Tom Cruise) to a crowded room full of his fellow Nazi officers. They’ve gathered to plot the overthrow of the Third Reich, starting with the assassination of Adolf Hitler and ending with an elegantly crafted military coup. Every detail of Bryan Singer’s World War II thriller is spit-and-polish perfect, even down to the unlikely choice of Cruise in the leading role. But it’s no spoiler to announce that Hitler survives von Stauffenberg’s plot. For the most part Singer succeeds in investing scenes with tension and surprise, but there’s no escaping the inevitable. (VG) At Beltway Movies 6. THE WRESTLER Director Darren Aronofsky’s bleak, strangely inspiring tale of a lonely man struggling with age and a desperate dedication to the brutal grind of professional wrestling: Mickey Rourke plays Randy “The Ram� Robinson, a hulking, good-natured (outside the ring) jock who has—surprise—alienated his daughter Stephanie ( Evan Rachel Wood), and the pathos of an absentee dad trying to salvage a relationship with a neglected child is compelling. Smokin’ hot (and talented) Marisa Tomei plays world-weary single-mom exotic dancer Cassidy, whose scenes with the Ram coalesce into a picture of an awkward, unsure courtship. Aronofsky’s unvarnished strip-joint scenes and graphically violent wrasslin’action ain’t very pretty,but Rourke finds a way to connect to a man enduring humiliation and mortification of the flesh to remain part of the thing that gives him purpose: performance. (JM) YES MAN Ostensibly an adaptation of Danny Wallace’s memoir of the same name, director Peyton Reed appears only to be interested in the book’s basic premise, that a man says yes to everything for a year—from credit card offers to invitations to people on the street— and spun that idea into a sometimes funny, generally soulless Jim Carrey broad comedy. Spoiler alert: apparently saying yes to everything isn’t the answer. (CH) At Beltway Movies 6. ■—The City Paper Clippers: John Barry, J. Bowers, Michael Byrne, G. Brian Davis, Anna Ditkoff, Serena Donadoni, Edward Ericson Jr., Steve Erickson, Jason Ferguson, R. Darryl Foxworth, Lee Gardner, Violet Glaze, Ian Grey, Evan Guilfoyle, Brooke Hall, Corey Hall, Jess Harvell, Cole Haddon, Eric Allen Hatch, Geoffrey Himes, Robert Ignizio, Martin L. Johnson, Joe MacLeod, Marc Masters, Bret McCabe, Al Shipley, Lauren Svrjcek, Wendy Ward.

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city paper | 59


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FEBRUARY 4, 2009

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SAVAGE LOVE

READ THE FINE PRINT MY GIRLFRIEND AND I ARE INTO male-orgasm denial. We’ve recently

tried putting Orajel on my cock and then covering it with two condoms so she can use me as a dildo without me getting off, or even feeling anything. It works great. Is there any chance of long-term health issues if we do this once a week or so? N UMB -D ICKED D UDE You didn’t s ay w hich k in d of Orajel you are using, but I hope it’s not Orajel Advanced Tooth Desensitizer. Its active ingredient— created to treat sensitive teeth, not desensitize cock—is something called “2-hydroxyethyl methacrylate,” which sounds like something you might find in baby formula that was made in China. The stuff works, according to Orajel’s web site, “by blocking dentinal tubules, preventing excitation of the tooth nerve.” And, hey, if it’s safe enough for your mouth, it’s probably safe enough for your cock and for newborns, right? Well, maybe not. A very quick search of the interwebs using that Googlemajob turns up a paper in the Journal of Dental Research with this rather alarming title: “2-Hydroxyethyl Methacrylate (HEMA) Is a Potent Inducer of Apoptotic Cell Death in Human and Mouse Cells.” Any responsible sex-advice professional would read the paper in its entirety and inform you about the likelihood that you’re killing off cock cells when you smear them with Orajel Advanced Tooth Desensitizer. But I’m an alarmist sex-advice professional, not a responsible one, so I’m just going to lay that title on you one more time: “2-Hydroxyethyl Methacrylate (HEMA) Is a Potent Inducer of Apoptotic Cell Death in Human and Mouse Cells.” I don’t know about you, NDD, but I’ve always erred on the side of not smearing my dick with shit that kills mice. (Not all brands of Orajel contain this ingredient, but a boy can’t be too careful.) It seems particularly foolish to smear any kind of Orajel on your cock when there are products on the market specifically designed for desensitizing cocks, things like Mandelay gel and Proloonging’s “penis desensitizing aid delay spray.” These products are marketed to men who suffer from premature ejaculation, even though numbing the dick doesn’t really cure premature ejaculation. They sound perfect for you and your orgasmdenying girlfriend, though, and I’d recommend ’em over that potential rat poison you’re using now.

I’m a gay guy, 25, in great shape, no STDs. To make me happy, any longterm relationship will need to have a strong BDSM element to it. And I’m having a lot of trouble finding a BDSM relationship that makes me happy. If I mention my BDSM needs up front when I meet a guy, I get the “never done it, never will” response or the “ew, gross” response. When I date a guy before I mention it, the guy is usually willing to try it (even

difficult stuff like CBT and e-stim), but it’s always because he likes me and wants to get me off. So while I’m feeling the pain, I’m not feeling dominated. And when I try to find guys specifically into BDSM (leather bars, fetish web sites), I only find physically unattractive guys. I know I’m not the only young, attractive gay guy in Chicago into restraints and pain. But how do I find the others? F INDING E XTREMELY D EFICIENT E ROTIC X CITEMENT Go to dudesnude.com, FEDEX, and search for profiles featuring guys who included “S&M” among their interests. You’ll find tons of guys under 30, many of them very goodlooking, and lots in Chicago. So

take possession of your widow’s dog collar. But to set your mind at ease, I called a very good lawyer and annoyed him with your very stupid question: “No, no, no, no. A gift from one person to another is not illegal— that’s the bottom-line answer,” said D. J. Rausa, a very good lawyer in private practice in California who I found via the “Kink-Aware Professionals” listings at the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom. “The government is not going to be interested in a gift, in any gift, unless they can tax it.” And unless that dog collar is solid gold and the word “slave” is spelled out on it with big fat diamonds, NAGL, the IRS doesn’t give a shit. And since you don’t file a will with the state, but with your lawyer, the odds of being prosecuted for engaging in S&M—already infinitesimal—are nil. Worry about the fact that you can’t legally marry your fiancée, NAGL, and not about Uncle Sam swooping in and stealing your sex toys.

the

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I’m a 27-year-old bi girl with a lovely fiancée. I’m a top; she’s a sub. I’m trying to be responsible, so this weekend I sat down and wrote my will. I hope I won’t need it anytime soon, but it makes me feel better to know friends and family will get what I want them to have before the IRS can take the rest. You have to specify each item and its recipient, and that’s where I ran into trouble. I want to leave my fiancée’s collar to her, rather than Uncle Sam, but wasn’t sure how specific I could be without either of us being prosecuted for practicing S&M, which is illegal under current laws in the state where I live. So I can’t say, “I’m leaving the S&M collar to my fiancée.” We don’t have a dog and aren’t going to get one, so writing “leather collar” looks strange and makes me nervous. Do you have any advice? N EEDS A G OOD L AWYER Most people into S&M have a touch of the drama queen about them, I realize, but let’s not be ridiculous. If you should precede your sub in death, NAGL, I promise you that Uncle Sam is not going to

“RealTouch is only activated by the . . . movies in our video-on-demand library,” says Jim McAnally (a pseudonym, I’m thinkin’) at RealTouch HQ. A per-minute price has not been established, as the toy is not yet being sold—a detail I would’ve included last week, had I known—but “the device [will be] activated with 30 minutes when it is purchased.” So you’re right, NBO: RealTouch could be considered a porn marketing device. I wouldn’t go so far as to call it a scam, and neither would Mr. McAnally: “The device is driven by a haptic data stream that we have to encode with a lot of detail,” he added. “To give you an idea, it takes eight hours to encode 15 minutes worth of content. And that data stream doesn’t exist outside of the video that has been encoded.” Good to know. But many men will be disappointed to learn that they can only use this toy when they ’re watching porn. Here’s hoping that RealTouch 2.0 has more functions. ■ Download the Savage Lovecast (my weekly podcast) every Tuesday at thestranger.com/savage. Got problems? Write mail@ savagelove.net.

♥ ♥

VALENTINE’S DAY ♥ ♥ ♥ SHOPPING ♥ ♥

RealTouch, the new sex toy for men that you wrote about recently, is a porn-marketing device, not a

sex toy. Note that it says on the web site that the first “30 minutes [are] free” (translation: You’ll have to pay the rest of the time) and that the FAQ says explicitly that it cannot be used by itself. It’s a scam, IMO. N OT B UYING O NE

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ HOT ♥ ♥ ♥

I PROMISE YOU THAT UNCLE SAM IS NOT GOING TO TAKE POSSESSION OF YOUR WIDOW’S DOG COLLAR. keep looking, FEDEX. Very few gay guys your age, kinky or not, have managed to find a person they can see entering an LTR with . . . so no more whining, mmmkay? Continue to search online and in leather bars, continue to be honest with the guys you date, and sooner or later you’ll meet someone who’s as anxious to introduce you to his parents as he is to torture your cock and balls.

THANKS FOR MAKING US BALTIMORE’S BEST ADULT STORE TWO YEARS IN A ROW!

Haircuts: $16

BY DA N S AVAG E

IN STORE & ONLINE♥♥

Friday, Feb 6th

First Fridays Party at Sugar 6:00 pm - 9:00 pm • FREE!

BALTIMORE’S JAZZ, NEWS & PUBLIC AFFAIRS STATION LISTEN ONLINE AT WEAA.ORG

Celebrate winter and check out some toys that are sure to keep you warm! Then go down the street and check out the rest of the incredible merchants in Hampden.

Fri, Feb 6th

9-10pm • $22

Stripping Series: floor shows, lap dancing and dancing with props Allow Regina to guide you in unveiling your most sensual side. Women of all body types, sexual orientations and gender expressions are welcome. Tickets available in person, over the phone with a credit card or at the door.

Sun., Feb. 8th

6:00 pm • $20

Love Yourself!

In this class we’ll explore all kinds of ways to love yourself up - sexually, emotionally and spiritually. If you’re in relationship, single by choice, or between relationships this class is for you! Tickets available in person at the store, over the phone by credit card or online at Brown Paper Tickets

CHECK OUT OUR NEW ONLINE STORE!

Sugar is located at

927 West 36th Street Hampden • 410.467.2632 We are on the corner of 36th & Roland. Entrance is in the parking lot off Roland right under Sprout.

w w w.sugar theshop.com citypaper.com

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

city paper | 61


DIRT FARM

BY BEN CLAASSEN III

MAAKIES

62 | city paper

THE PAIN—WHEN WILL IT END?

BY TIM KREIDER

BY TONY MILLIONAIRE

FEBRUARY 4, 2009

citypaper.com


005

A BARTENDING SCHOOL: A new class starts every Monday Two weeks – day or eve classes Free job placement assistance Train behind a REAL BAR. Low tuition – Rec. Certification BBB member- Free parking

Call 410-787-0020 Maryland Bartending Academy Don’t be fooled calling 800#'s

EMPLOYMENT

010

ACCT EXEC/ MKTING & SALES Mkting firm seeks outgoing, ambitious leader for mgmt in training program. We train in all aspects of business. Meet with clients and conduct presentations. Fortune 500 client. Growth potential. Great Pay, Travel. Fun environment. Call Cara at 410-252-6430 www.dmsbaltimore.com

CITY PAPER = RESULTS! "I just wanted to thank everyone at City Paper for their professionalism and speed of placing an ad. It is always a pleasure advertising with City Paper – it is quick, hassle-free, and we have a great success rate with filling our vacant apartments" – Lisa Cramer, MP3 Services, LLC

ADMINISTRATIVE

ACTIVISM

FIGHT DIRTY POLITICIANS

F/T PERSONAL ASSISTANT

We are ready to bring change to Environmental policy in Maryland, now is the time! Join us in making democracy work in Maryland through community organizing. 1:30pm-10pm. $10-13/hour + bonus. 410-235-8808.

Full time position available for an energetic, self-motivated, and honest personal assistant for busy President of local entertainment company. Candidate must have a flexible disposition, be able to multi-task, have ability to prioritize, and possess excellent time management skills. Job will require traveling in and around Baltimore City (corporate office located in Millersville moving to Baltimore in Summer 09). Must have reliable transportation and be able to work flexible hours. Please email resume to bthompson@premier-rides.com or fax to 410-923-3157.

"We got an overwhelming response! In 2 days, we hired the employee we were looking for!" Renaissance Fine Arts Gallery

ACTIVISM

PROTECT CRITICAL AREAS! The land surrounding the Chesapeake Bay is being threatened by development. We must protect this land now or the Bay will continue to suffer. We are winning this campaign through grassroots community outreach, and we need your help. $10-13/hour + bonus. 1:30pm-10pm. 410-235-8810

MAKE YOUR AD STAND OUT! Add your company's logo to your Classified Line ad! Call Nicole at 443-452-1522 for details "We got an overwhelming response! In 2 days, we hired the employee we were looking for!" Renaissance Fine Arts Gallery

Readers / Evaluators Needed For scoring of essays and standardized tests. Bachelors Degree required. Available Day Hours 8:15am-4pm Project to begin late April.

Contact: Measurement Inc.

410-788-8629 Ask about our available non-degree positions. All scoring will be done at the Catonsville Scoring Center.

10-49 EMPLOYMENT p.63-72 100-149 BILLBOARD p.66, 73 160-199 MARKETPLACE p.73-74 SERVICES DIRECTORY p.75 300-399 WELLNESS p.75 400-499 ART, MUSIC & ENTERTAINMENT p.75-76 500-599 FOR ADULTS p.76-79 700-799 AUTOMOTIVE p.80-83 800-820 ROOMMATES p.84-85 825-899 FOR RENT p.85-94 900-999 REAL ESTATE p.94-95

EARLY 2009 DEADLINES Sizzlin’ Summer (May 20th) Noon, Friday, May 15th Memorial Day (May 25th) Noon, Friday, May 22th Labor Day (Sept 7th) Noon, Friday, September 4th Best of Baltimore (Sept 23rd) Noon, Friday, September 18th Holiday Guide (Nov 11th) Noon, Friday, November 6th

PLACING YOUR AD OFFICE HOURS: Monday–Friday 8:30a–5:00p

FAX: 410-728-8728 PHONE:

Line Ads: 410-523-3100 Display Ads: 410-523-0300 (x246) Real Estate: 410-523-0300 (x248)

DEADLINES:

Line Ads: Monday 12 noon Display Ads: Friday 5pm Walk-ins: Friday 4pm DISCLAIMER: Claims for errors must be made within 14 days of the date the ad appeared. Liability is limited to in-house credit equal to cost of ad’s first insertion. City Paper reserves the right to revise or reject any advertising.

CLASSIFIED

CAREER TRAINING

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OF CLASSIFICATIONS

BALTIMORE’S MOST AMAZING CLASSIFIEDS

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★★★ CLASSIFIED ONLINE AT W W W.CITYPAPER.K A ANGO.COM ★★★ ★★★ 812 Park Ave., Baltimore, MD 21201 • classified@citypaper.com ★★★

EMPLOYMENT

citypaper.com

FEBRUARY

4,

2009

city paper | 63


CITYPAPER.

KAANGO.COM MAC PERSONAL TRAINER! A WINNING CAREER! Maryland Athletic Club, a growing fitness and wellness company, seeks a full-time experienced Personal Trainer for its high-end, award-winning facility in Timonium and Harbor East. MAC Trainers enjoy a high income potential and many fabulous benefits! Must have a national certification, have BS degree in related field, minimum 1 year professional training experience, and a passion for helping others.

See why the MAC clubs are such a great place to work! Visit www.macwellness.com & click “career opportunities”.

Fax Resume to: 410-453-9867

ADMINISTRATIVE

LOVE ANIMALS? Would you like to work at Balto’s premier vet hosp? Our recepts are the 1st and last impression on our clients and play a crucial part in our success. Must be able to efficiently answer a multi-line phone sys, sched appts, and address clients' ??s and concerns in a fast paced environment. Prev med office or college course work reqrd. We offer a Competitive compensation package and great working environment. Please fax resume to 410-327-8254 to apply

AUTOMOTIVE

AUTO TECHNICIAN Looking for new team member. Should have evolved diagnostic skills, L1 Certified & MD Inspector preferred. Ability to operate a wheel lift & roll back a plus. Excellent pay & benefits. Apply online at www.a1autothreebrotherscarrepair.c om Call 410-566-5878 after application submitted to confirm receipt. $3000 bonus for the right technician

!BARTEND! Up to $300 a day. No experience necessary. Training Available. 1-800-965-6520 x 264

Baltimore City Corrections Program seeks applicants for the following two positions:

Cook

Evening, PT (28 hours per week) H.S. Diploma, 1-3 years experience in commercial or institutional food preparation. $8.50/hr. Pass cook physical.

House Supervisor

(several on-call positions) Responsible for monitoring the activities of residents and ensuring compliance with program rules and regulations. Requirements: HS or GED with related work experience in a criminal justice setting. Program located on bus route. Must pass TB and Drug testing, and background check.

FEBRUARY

4, 2009

Needed/USA and overseas. $119 - $220K/year. Bodyguards $250 $750 a day. 18 or older. 1-615-885-8960 x942 www.InternationalExecutives.net (AAN CAN)

BODYGUARDS WANTED Free training. No exp needed. Excellent $$$. Free travel. Call 615-228-1701 www.psubodyguards.com

CARPENTER Skilled trim/finish carpenter with other skills to handle rehab in Fells Point. 410-276-7786

CARPENTERS Needed for long term project. $15 per hour. Drug free. Must have own trans. Presentation is critical. Call 410-369-0022

CONSTRUCTION

EDUCATION/TRAINING DRIVERS

$300-800/WK!!! Earn $300-800/wk. Must have own vehicle. Vans earn more. Call 410-625-9654

DRIVERS

JOB DEVELOPMENT SPECIALIST FT. Responsible for employment of hard-to-place individuals. Identify employers and assist participants in job retention and advancement. Req. B.S. or equivalent exp. Email resume to bariano@ecsm.org Resume Deadline: Feb. 9, 2009 EDUCATION/TRAINING

TAXI DRIVERS WANTED New driver incentive programs available. Computerized dispatch. Take car home @ night. Make $100+ per day! HOW SOON DO YOU WANT TO START MAKING $$$? Call 410-662-0300

EDUCATION

TRAINING COORDINATOR FT. Responsible for providing daily life skills and soft job skills training to men with criminal backgrounds. Assist with curriculum development. Req. AA Degree and 3-5 years of teaching/training exp. E-mail resume to bariano@ecsm.org Resume Deadline: Feb. 9, 2009 GENERAL

DIRECTOR For non-profit Community Center. Must be personable, creative, organized & professional. Must be able to dev. services, programs, events & grants. Exp. preferred. Contact 410-628-1207 EOE

STOREFRONT FABRICATORS

ADVERTISE YOUR SERVICE!

Fabricate and Install, Join our team, need tools & references, steady work. Exc pay and ben. S.W. Baltimore nr 695 & 95. 410-227-9009

Over 71% of City Paper's readers have purchased a product or service after seeing it in the City Paper within 3 months. Call 410-523-3100 to place your ad today!

POST OFFICE NOW HIRING! Avg. pay $20/hr, $57K/yr. Incl. Fed Ben, OT. Placed by adSource, not affiliated w/USPS, who hires. 866-417-9792

CITY PAPER = RESULTS! "I just wanted to thank everyone at City Paper for their professionalism and speed of placing an ad. It is always a pleasure advertising with City Paper – it is quick, hassle-free, and we have a great success rate with filling our vacant apartments" – Lisa Cramer, MP3 Services, LLC

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C[hh_jj 7j^b[j_Y 9bkX _i WYj_l[bo beea_d] \eh jhW_d[hi \eh Wbb beYWj_edi$ L_i_j c[hh_jjYbkXi$Yec je Yecfb[j[ Wd Wffb_YWj_ed$ M[ m_bb X[ iY^[Zkb_d] _dj[hl_[mi \eh j^[ m[[a e\ <[XhkWho (dZ # <[XhkWho ,j^

C[hh_jj 7j^b[j_Y 9bkXi ?i W \kd WdZ [nY_j_d] [dl_hedc[dj j^Wj e\\[hi lWh_eki X[d[Óji0 FW_Z LWYWj_ed F[hiedWb B[Wl[ C[Z_YWb" :[djWb WdZ L_i_ed <b[n_Xb[ If[dZ_d] *&'A FW_Z ;ZkYWj_ed Effehjkd_j_[i ?jÊi Dej @kij W @eX" ?jÊi W B_\[ijob[

Contact: Z. Butler 410-563-9003 or fax to 410-675-1141 EOE M/F 64 | city paper

BODYGUARDS – COUNTER ASSAULT TEAMS

citypaper.com


MEDICAL TRAIN FOR

PATIENT CARE TECHNICIAN JOBS

HEALTH CARE

EMT'S NEEDED Immediate opening for EMT’s. Team oriented work environment. Must have State of Maryland certification. Experience preferred, salary competitive and Negotiable. Call for Appointment and Immediate interviews between 10AM—3 PM Monday – Friday Call: 410-728-1951 MEDICAL

ADMIN SUPPORT MEDICAL ASST MEDICAL BILLER CODING SPECIALIST

In Partnership with the Mayor's Office of Employment Development, Maryland Center for Arts and Technology (MCAT) is offering Job Training.

MEDICAL

CAREERS

JE 7:L;HJ?I; OEKH C;:?97B 97H;;HI

Applicants must have: * CNA License * High School diploma/GED * Reading Score 9th Grade & Above (TABE Testing) * Math Score 6th Grade & Above (TABE Testing) * No Felony convictions * Must Pass Drug Screening * Baltimore City Resident

97BB0 *'&$+()$&)&&

Register NOW! Call 410-728-0679 2901 Druid Park Dr., Suite 303

MUSICALLY

Career oppty for employees w/strong skills in a clinical/ non-clinical bkgnd. 1 yr + exp. 410-561-1599 kiyanap@jfcmedical.com

INCLINED? If you've had 2 + yrs of piano. Flex hours teaching children piano – Fun Job! We supply students & materials. $22/hr + bonuses. MUST HAVE CAR! 410-654-9131 MYSTERY SHOPPERS

GET PAID TO SHOP! MAKE YOUR AD STAND OUT! Add your company's logo to your Classified Line ad! Call Nicole at 443-452-1522 for details

CITY PAPER = RESULTS! "I was only looking for 2 people but got a good 200 calls, 10-15 a day, and many were more than qualified. I will use City Paper again because obviously people look here for J-O-B-S!" Anthony Fries, Horizon Financial

Retail/ Dining establishments need undercover clients to judge quality/ customer service. Earn up to $150 a day. Call 800-601-5516

NOW HIRING Comm'l Construction Staffing Co Hiring for All Phases of Construction. Steady Work. Drug Free, Driver's Lic, Own Trans. 1-866-809-7229

CITY PAPER = RESULTS! "I just wanted to thank everyone at City Paper for their professionalism and speed of placing an ad. It is always a pleasure advertising with City Paper – it is quick, hassle-free, and we have a great success rate with filling our vacant apartments" – Lisa Cramer, MP3 Services, LLC

HIPPIES IPPIES WITH ITH Tired of having spare change after your paycheck is spent on bills?

THE THE

FLOW LOW

EDUCATION / INSTRUCTION

put your hands on a better Future ! Become a Massage Therapist in as little as 7 months! 142d

Hip art and decorating company seeks career-oriented men and women who enjoy money, music and casual dress. No experience necessary. Paid training up to $500 per week. Full Time. For immediate interview, call 410-789-8030

MAKE YOUR AD STAND OUT!

PROGRAMS LEADING TO CAREERS IN:

517 PROGRESS DR., SUITE A-L | LINTHICUM, MD 21090

CALL NOW! CLASSES STARTING SOON!

Massage Therapy Esthetics (Skin Care)

1.877.760.2941

Add your company's logo to your Classified Line ad! Call Nicole at 443-452-1522 for details

TURN 422,000 READERS INTO YOUR CUSTOMERS! Advertise your Service for just $25 per week when you book 4 weeks or more. *Includes headline & 4 lines of text. Call 410-523-3100 to place your ad today!

CLASSIFIED LINE DEADLINE: EVERY MONDAY AT NOON. CALL 410-523-3100 TO PLACE YOUR AD TODAY!

www.bsom.com )LQDQFLDO ALG AYDLODEOH TR TKRVH :KR 4XDOLI\ citypaper.com

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RESTAURANT

PHARMACY TECH

!

FREEßADVERTISING PLACE YOUR MARKETPLACE AD FOR

FREE

CONTACT ROB FARLEY AT CITYPAPER FOR DETAILS.

PHARMACY TECHNICIAN

HOSTESS

Exam Review Class. Techs can earn $15+/hr. Beginning February 2009, state law requires that all pharmacy technicians be certified. Sign up now for our 2-4 wk training class. Contact: amkapharm@comcast.net or fax 410-800-4376

LEGAL/PUBLIC NOTICES

ADVERTISE YOUR BUSINESS

To age 34, in excellent physical condition, willing to relocate. Training program, top pay & benefits. 800-322-9595

In 111 alternative newspapers like this one. Over 6 million circulation every week for $1200. No adult ads. Call Rick at 202-289-8484 (AAN CAN)

HAIR 2000

Average pay $20/hr or $57k/yr, includes Federal Benefits and OT. Placed by adSource, not affiliated w/ USPS who hires. 1-866-616-7019 (AAN CAN) RESTAURANT

OUTBACK In Canton, is looking for SERVERS. One year of experience required. Apply in person Monday Thurs 2 - 4 PM at 2400 Boston St SALES

RESIDUAL SALES INCOME CITY CAFE CATHEDRAL & EAGER ST Mount Vernon's landmark restaurant is now hiring: FT/PT SERVERS FT LINE COOK Apply in person at 1001 Cathedral St. Mon-Fri, 2-5pm, or visit www.citycafebaltimore.com RESTAURANT

COOK PT/Relief, wkends, holidays, occ wkdays, for 45 person pre-release ctr (N. Caroline St or S. Mount St). Drug bkground chk req. Resume: Dismas House, PO Box 4435 Balto, MD 21223 Fax: 410-233-1622

Work from Home, F/T, P/T, Contacting Law Firms in Maryland. Email resume to: Sales@legalpapers.net or fax 410-823-1649 www.legalpapers.net

SALES

SALES PROFESSIONALS Needed to promote financial products / credit cards for Major Airlines in the Baltimore Washington International Airport.

Advertise your Service for only $25 per week when you book 4 weeks or more. *Includes headline & 4 lines of text. Call 410-523-3100

DATA ENTRY PROCESSORS NEEDED! Earn $3,500-$5,000 Weekly Working From Home! Guaranteed Paycheck! No Experience Needed! Positions Available Today! Register Online Now! http://www.DataPositions.com (AAN CAN)

EARN EXECUTIVE LEVEL INCOME Working from home. Free 2-min msg. 1-800-224-5977 Don't believe…don't call!

$100K IN 100 DAYS Simply Returning Phone Calls! Not a job or MLM. No Selling. 888-514-6500

Great way to earn a supplemental income with a flexible schedule. Fantastic pay/commission scale! Call to find out more immediately!!! Call 1-888-691-1810 or email jobs@klmgroup.com

PUBLIC NOTICE TO ANTOINE TERRELL FLOOD

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES 030

8?BB8E7H:

'&&#'*/

CARE AVAILABLE

100

IN RE: ADOPTION OF JOCELYN ROSE FLOOD, A minor – No. 2008-134 AND IN RE: ADOPTION OF JAMAL TERRELL FLOOD – A minor – No. 2008-135 A Petition has been filed asking the Court to put an end to all rights you have as a parent to your children, Jocelyn Rose Flood and Jamal Terrell Flood. An involuntary Termination of Parental Rights Hearing has been scheduled for March 16, 2009 at 9:00 a.m. in Hearing Room No. 6 of the York County Judicial Center, 45 North George Street, York , Pennsylvania, to terminate your parental rights to Jocelyn Rose Flood and Jamal Terrell Flood, whose Step-Father is Gemino Rafael Cortez and whose Mother is Jennifer Rose Cortez. You are warned that even if you fail to appear at the scheduled hearing, the hearing will go on without you and your rights to your child may be ended by the Court without you being present. You have a right to be represented at the hearing by a lawyer. You should take this paper to your lawyer at once. If you do not have a lawyer or cannot afford one, go to or telephone the office set forth below to find out where you can get legal help.

COMPASSIONATE & Committed care for your elderly parent. I will come to your home 6 days a week Sun – Fri Hourly rate. State board certified, excellent references, Own transportation & CPR Certified. 443-760-1185

;Vb^an DlcZY VcY ;Vb^an ;g^ZcYan Are you looking for a job that offers challenging work, great pay and benefits, yet still allows you the flexibility you need to enjoy life at home?

BUSINESS OPPORTUNITIES

As one of Baltimore’s only family-owned grocery stores, Eddie’s of Roland Park understands. If you’ve got a winning personality, good work ethic, and a positive outlook on life, we’re more than happy to customize a work schedule that meets your needs. It’s the reason that some of our employees have been with us for over 40 years. Now accepting applications for Journeyman Meat Cutters, as well as other positions.

5113 Roland Avenue 410.323.3656

66 | city paper

6213 N. Charles St. 410-377.8040

apply online at eddiesofrolandpark.com FEBRUARY

4, 2009

citypaper.com

110

Talented Stylist to join our team. Exp. in coloring & highlights. Grt'd Salary & Bene. Call 410-207-8336

CITY PAPER SERVICES SPECIAL! Send resume to Attn.: M. Wescott, PII, 10819 Gilroy Road, Hunt Valley, MD 21031

HIGH SCHOOL GRADS

STYLIST RESTAURANT

POST OFFICE NOW HIRING!

SR. CHEMIST s Perform analytical methods dev't for raw materials/finished prods. s Prep/exed. Validation Protocols. s Create specs for raw materials/finish prods. s Investigate specs results. s 40hpw; s MS in Chemistry; s 6 mos wkexp in job offered or as a Research Scientist; s Exp. in HPLC, GC, LC-MS, HPTLC, DSC, Dissolution, Disintegration, KF Titrator, IR, UVVIS, Spectrophotometer. s Know GLP, FDA, ICH guidelines and requirements; s Jobloc: Hunt Valley, MD.

SALT, a recognized Butchers Hill restaurant, is now interviewing for a hostess. Strong customer service skills a must; rest exp helpful. Call 410-276-5480 for an interview

SECURITY/LAW ENFORCEMENT

TERRY R. BAKER Family Court Administrator York County Court of Common Pleas York County Judicial Center 45 North George Street York, Pennsylvania 17401 Telephone No. (717)771-9360 Petitioner's Attorney: Thomas M. Clark, Esquire 130 West Church Street, Ste. 100 Dillsburg, PA 17019 Rated in the Top 100 Fastest Growing Businesses in America

Apply for Government Positions at Aberdeen Proving Ground that Commence Summer 2009 BUDGET ANALYST COMPUTER SCIENTIST CONTRACT SPECIALIST ENGINEER LOGISTICS MANAGER MANAGEMENT ANALYST OPERATIONS RESEARCH ANALYST & ACCOUNTANT PROGRAM ANALYST PROGRAM MANAGER

BRAC JOB FAIR Saturday, February 7, 2009 10 a.m. - 4 p.m. Harford Community College Chesapeake Center 401 Thomas Run Road Bel Air, Maryland 21015 Registration is required at www.swnetwork.org For information call 410-939-4240

If you are independent, reliable and driven to succeed-we can help give you the

enterprising edge you’ve been looking for. Anago of Baltimore can help you join a talented network of owner-operators in the commercial cleaning business! Anago gives you everything you need to become your own boss! We provide training and set up all of your contracts for you. Call 410.760.6309 or visit us at www.anagomd.com for more information today!

We Clean America’s Businesses


LEGAL/PUBLIC NOTICES

110

WRITERS WANTED The Academy for Alternative Journalism, established by papers like this one to promote diversity in the alternative press, seeks talented journalists and students (college seniors and up) for a paid summer writing program at Northwestern University's Medill School of Journalism. The eight-week program (June 21 – Aug, 16, 2009) aims to recruit talented candidates from diverse backgrounds and train them in alt-weekly style feature writing. Ten participants will be chosen and paid $3,000 plus housing and travel allowances. For information and an application visit http://altjournalism.org. You may email us at altacademy@northwestern.edu. Applications must be postmarked by Feb. 13, 2009. Northwestern University is an equal opportunity educator and employer

CLUBS & ORGANIZATIONS

125

CAREER TRAINING

TRIVIA NIGHT AT THE ENGINEERS CLUB Fri., Feb. 6 at 6 PM. Fundraiser for Engineers Week 2009. $25/pp, $20/spectator. Advance Registration req'd. No Engineering Trivia! 11 W. Mt. Vernon Pl. For more info: www.esb.org or call (410) 539-6914

WANTED

140

ABSOLUTELY CA$H Need Cash Today? We Pay Cash for Your Unneeded Gold, Silver, Platinum, Diamonds, Broken Jewelry & Coins. Call 443-829-6699

ANTIQUES 115

TOP CASH PAID for Antiques & Collectible. Glassware, toys, trains, furniture, pottery, silver, military items, jewelry, etc. Buying 7 days a week. Call 410-391-4405

CONSIDERING ADOPTION? Local agency. Caring, Compassionate, 24 hour a day personalized confidential service. WE'RE HERE TO HELP. Adoption is from one heart to another. Adoption Makes Family. 410-683-2100

I pay $ CASH $ for your LP's, 45's & 78's. R & B, jazz, rock, blues, world, reggae, punk, new wave, metal, rap, folk, gospel, lounge exotica, soul funk, country, club, dance, etc. I also buy TURN TABLES & GUITARS Call 443-226-9628

ADOPTION

PREGNANT?

GOT RECORDS?

REQUEST FOR PROPOSAL PROFESSIONAL SERVICES TO DESIGN & IMPLEMENT A DOCUMENT IMAGING & WORKFLOW MANAGEMENT SYSTEM FOR THE CITY OF BALTIMORE EMPLOYEES’ RETIREMENT SYSTEM (ERS) The ERS is seeking the services of a systems integrator (vendor) to implement a complete solution for solving the agency’s document imaging and work ow management needs. The intent of this RFP is to select one ďŹ rm to provide the services. To immediately receive the RFP packet, you must email, fax or mail your request to: Donna S. Bowen, Special Assistant Employees’ Retirement System 7 East Redwood Street, 12th oor Baltimore, Maryland 21202 Phone: 443-984-3180 Fax: 410-528-1474 Email: donna.bowen@bcers.org DUE DATE FOR SUBMITTING RESPONSES TO THE RFP IS TUESDAY, MARCH 31, 2009 @ 3:00 P.M., EDT. The ERS reserves the right to reject any or all proposals or any items, to cancel the RFP, and to waive any imperfections in a proposal if doing so is in the best interest of the agency. All proposals shall become the property of the ERS.

RESEARCH WELLNESS Do it for a good cause! Algorithme Pharma is currently seeking men and women, nonsmokers and light-smokers, ages 18 and older, to participate in a research study of known medications. You could receive from $700 to $4,000* in compensation as well as study-related medical evaluation at no cost. * Compensation based on the completed study, length of stay and number of return visits. Several studies are available.

t t www.sciencepays.com citypaper.com

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city paper | 67


H;I;7H9> M;BBD;II ECSTASY USERS <H;; H;I;7H9> NEEDED JH;7JC;DJ <EH 9E97?D; 7D: EF?7J; 78KI; Healthy men and women who are between ages of 18-55 are needed to participate in an outpatient research study at the Johns Hopkins Bayview Medical Center. The study will last up to 31 weeks and will provide standard methadone maintenance treatment.

Volunteers aged 18-30 are needed to participate in the studies on the effects of drug use at the Johns Hopkins Bayview Medical Center. Currently participants are needed for 5-day inpatient studies and 2 day outpatient studies. Study participants will receive financial compensation. Travel expenses will be covered. For more information call:

410.550.5295 or 410.550.2588 Collect calls accepted.

Total possible earnings are $1155.00 Principal Investigator: Annie Umbricht, MD.

IRB#: 04-02-09-05

RPN # NA0003333 Approved May 07, 2007

Call (410) 550-1102 and refer to study 0606

Give The Sweetest Gift of All!

REC OVE RY

GLASS SUBSTANCE ABUSE PROGRAMS, Inc.

68 | city paper

UÊ Õ«Ài À« iÉ iÌ >` iÊ*À }À> à UÊ ` Û `Õ> Ê> `Ê À Õ«Ê Õ Ãi } UÊ VÕ«Õ VÌÕÀiÉ i Ì> Ê i> Ì Ê-iÀÛ Vià UÊ ÀÕ} ÀiiÊ Õ Ãi }É "*

-- 8É 1 ÊÊUÊ/ " 1

"7 /"7 ÊUÊ-"1/ Ê / ",

Free Confidential Assessments

410.CALL.GLASS 410.225.5452 A?2.A:2;A D6A5 ?2@=20A ?2@B9A@ FEBRUARY

4, 2009

citypaper.com


-Dr. Alberto Yataco International Research Center

ADDICTED?

The ad in City Paper has been amazing! We get 40 to 60 people calling per edition. Close to 40% of them go through the study. We actually have a waiting list of people who want to get into the center!

GET BACK TO LIFE!

H;I;7H9> M;BBD;II ESEARCH VOLUNTEERS )FBMUIZ NFO BHFE UP BSF OFFEFE UP QBSUJDJQBUF JO B SFTFBSDI TUVEZ PG DPNNPOMZ VTFE ESVHT BU UIF +PIOT )PQLJOT #BZWJFX .FEJDBM $FOUFS 1BSUJDJQBUJPO MBTUT BCPVU NPOUIT BOE JOWPMWFT BO JOJUJBM TDSFFOJOH TFTTJPO TFTTJPOT XJUI PWFSOJHIU TUBZT BOE OJHIUMZ DBQTVMF JOHFTUJPO BU IPNF :PV XJMM CF QBJE VQ UP GPS QBSUJDJQBUJOH

For more information, please call (410) 550-1916 and refer to study # 0610 1SJODJQBM *OWFTUJHBUPS .JSJBN .JOU[FS 1I% 1SPUPDPM /"@ "QQSPWFE .BSDI

Available treatment within 24 to 48 hours. Open 7 days a week. š :[jen WdZ ?dj[di_l[ EkjfWj_[dj 9ekdi[b_d] š IkXened[ eh C[j^WZed[ CW_dj[dWdY[ (28 day take homes for the eligible patient)

š - ZWo%:[jen (,& Center for Addiction Medicine Dr. Michael Hayes .&, B_dZ[d 7l[dk[" 8Wbj_ceh[" C: ('(&' š 410.225.8240 mmm$YWcjh[Wjc[dj$Yec š JCAHO Accredited

To place your ad for clinical trials, employment or health care opportunities, call Leslie at 443-452-1534.

Child with Behavioral Problems? Your CHILD may be eligible for mental health research if he or she: • Is between the ages of 10 and 17 • Is medically healthy • Has had problems in school (disruptiveness, anger, or aggression) • Doesn't feel guilty when doing something wrong Researchers at the NIMH are seeking children and adolescent volunteers with behavioral problems to participate in research studies. No treatment will be offered. Participation may include behavioral observation, brain imaging, and psychological interviews. The studies are conducted at the NIH Clinical Center in Bethesda, Maryland. Financial compensation and transportation assistance will be provided

Please call:

301-594-8705

(TTY: 1-866-411-1010)

http://patientinfo.nimh.nih.gov or for other studies: www.clinicaltrials.gov

National Institute of Mental Health National Institutes of Health, Department of Health & Human Services

Protocol #05-M-0105

Do you get depressed during the fall and winter months? Do you have problems with low energy and increased appetite during this time of year? If so, you may be experiencing seasonal depression. Investigators at University of Maryland are conducting a 6 week study of a non-medication light therapy for individuals with seasonal depression who are not currently being treated with antidepressants. Participants will receive a free evaluation of seasonal mood problems, and will be compensated for their time.

Please call 410-706-2324 citypaper.com

FEBRUARY

4,

2009

city paper | 69


H;I;7H9> M;BBD;II I\j\XiZ_ Mfclek\\ij E\\[\[

K_\ G8I<O<C :c`e`ZXc G_XidXZfcf^p Le`k# cfZXk\[ Xk ?XiYfi ?fjg`kXc `e 9Xck`dfi\ `j Zlii\ekcp j\\b`e^ Mfclek\\ij kf gXik`Z`gXk\ `e X Zc`e`ZXc i\j\XiZ_ ki`Xc kf \mXclXk\ Xe @em\jk`^Xk`feXc d\[`ZXk`fe% @] pfl Xi\ X ?\Xck_p DXc\ fi =\dXc\ Y\kn\\e k_\ X^\j f] (/$+, pfl dXp Y\ \c`^`Yc\ kf gXik`Z`gXk\%

K_`j jkl[p `emfcm\j fe\ jZi\\e`e^ m`j`k Xe[ k_i\\ ) [Xp & ( e`^_kj jkXpj Xk fli ?XiYfi ?fjg`kXc Zc`e`Z% @] pfl hlXc`]p pfl dXp i\Z\`m\ lg kf ((,'%'' `e Zfdg\ejXk`fe lgfe Zfdgc\k`fe f] k_\ jkl[p Xj n\cc Xj k_\ ]fccfn`e^ \mXclXk`fej [li`e^ jZi\\e`e^1 8 G_pj`ZXc# <B># ?\gXk`k`j&?@M k\jkj# Xe[ 9cff[ Xe[ Li`e\ XeXcpj`j Xk ef Z_Xi^\%

Gc\Xj\ ZfekXZk X G8I<O<C i\Zil`k\i kfcc ]i\\ Xk

($/..$-($JKL;P fi ($/..$-(.$//*0 =fi dfi\ `e]fidXk`fe# pfl dXp Xcjf ZfekXZk lj Yp \$dX`c Xk jkl[p%YXck`dfi\7gXi\o\c%Zfd Fi m`j`k lj Xk fli e\n nnn%YXck`dfi\ki`Xcj%Zfd n\Yj`k\% PAREXEL is conveniently located from I-95 just over the Hanover Street Bridge. From I-95 north take exit 55 from I-95 south take exit 54. Please reference study # 97173

Expertise that makes the Difference

TM

PAREXEL Clinical Pharmacology Research Unit, located at Harbor Hospital in Baltimore is currently seeking volunteers to participate in a clinical research trial to evaluate the antiviral activity, safety, and tolerability of a study drug to treat Hepatitis C. It will also evaluate how the study drug is absorbed, changed and removed from the body.

?<G8K@K@J : GFJ@K@M<6

If you have Hepatitis C and are between 18 and 60 years old, you may qualify to participate in a clinical research study. Participants must be HIV and Hepatitis B negative. Other restrictions may apply.

70 | city paper

FEBRUARY

4, 2009

citypaper.com

This study involves one screening visit, one 11 Day/10 Night stay and up to 6 possible outpatient visits at our Harbor Hospital Research unit. Qualified participants may receive up to $5,260.00 for time and travel. This study is not intended to treat your liver disease.

PAREXEL is conveniently located just over the Hanover Street Bridge. From I-95 North take exit 55 from I-95 South take exit 54.

Please contact a PAREXEL recruiter at 1-866-357-6571 or email us at study.baltimore@parexel.com. Please reference study 97132


H;I;7H9> M;BBD;II DIABETIC ULCER? Ia_d kbY[hi YWd X[ l[ho fW_d\kb" W\\[Yj ZW_bo WYj_l_j_[i WdZ b[WZ je ceh[ i[l[h[ Yecfb_YWj_edi$

I live in Baltimore, but I am helping to save lives in Africa.

?\ oek Wh[ W Z_WX[j_Y X[jm[[d j^[ W][i e\ '.#-+" ^Wl[ W ia_d kbY[h X[bem j^[ ad[[ \eh m^_Y^ oek Wh[ dej jWa_d] Wdo c[Z_YWj_ed " WdZ Ze dej kdZ[h]e Z_Wboi_i" oek cWo X[ [b_]_Xb[ je fWhj_Y_fWj[ _d W Yb_d_YWb h[i[WhY^ ijkZo \eh Wd _dl[ij_]Wj_edWb Zhk]$ 7bb ijkZo#h[bWj[Z YWh[ _i fhel_Z[Z Wj de Y^Wh][" _dYbkZ_d] f^oi_YWb [nWc_dWj_edi" n#hWoi" bWXehWjeho j[iji WdZ ijkZo c[Z_YWj_ed$ <_dWdY_Wb Yecf[diWj_ed \eh j_c[ WdZ jhWl[b cWo X[ WlW_bWXb[$

Je b[Whd ceh[" fb[Wi[ YWbb0 C_Z 7jbWdj_Y H[i[WhY^ 9[dj[h \eh >[Wbj^

**)#,'+#/&.+

mmm$C#7#H#9#>$eh] mmm$C#7#H#9#>$eh]

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@em\jk`^Xk`feXc :fekiXZ\gk`m\ ;`Xg_iX^d Research Study Volunteers Needed

Participate in a study at Johns Hopkins Center for Immunization Research and help develop vaccines to prevent deadly diseases found all over the world. Without ever leaving Baltimore, you can help save lives. Today, diseases such as Traveler’s Diarrhea, Malaria, West Nile, Dengue Fever and Avian Flu are hurting people all over the world. If you are 18 to 50 years old, you could help develop new vaccines. The Center offers both inpatient and outpatient vaccine studies. You will be paid for your time.

YOU HAVE THE POWER TO HELP HEAL THE WORLD.

Call 410-955-SAVE

Be a life saver.

Earn up to $2,250 for outpatient studies, depending on the number of study visits or up to $3,700 for inpatient studies.

(7283) today.

TM

Principal Investigator: Karen Charron, MPH Approved by CHR on May 14, 2008 CHR# H.22.04.02.19.A2 - (Ad# 101)

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Johns Hopkins Community Physicians citypaper.com

FEBRUARY

4,

2009

city paper | 71


H;I;7H9> M;BBD;II RESEARCH STUDIES AVAILABLE DO YOU

If you are 18 to 55 years old and

COCAINE

USERS

USE HEROIN?

use cocaine sometimes or every

NEEDED

day, we need you for inpatient or outpatient research studies. All participants will be paid for time

and travel. There is no cost for participation or study-related tests. Call for a confidential screening.

CALL

TODAY

RESEARCH STUDIES AVAILABLE

Call for a confidential screening. All participants will be paid for time and travel. TOLL FREE

CALLY 1-800-535-8254 T O DA

72 | city paper

T O DA

www.researchstudies.drugabuse.gov

If you are 18 NEEDED to 45 years old and use marijuana sometimes or every day, we need you for inpatient and outpatient research studies.

www.researchstudies.drugabuse.gov

FEBRUARY

4, 2009

citypaper.com

Call for a confidential screening. You will be paid for time and travel for your screening visit. Medication and counseling provided as part of the study.

CALLY 1-866-START NOW

1-800-535-8254

USERS

If you are 18 to 65 years old and struggling with heroin addiction, you could be eligible for a free 9-month outpatient methadone or buprenorphine maintenance research program.

TOLL FREE

TOLL FREE

MARIJUANA

RESEARCH STUDIES AVAILABLE

(1-866-782-7866)

www.researchstudies.drugabuse.gov

RESEARCH STUDIES AVAILABLE

do you SMOKE

If you smoke, you could be eligible for an outpatient research study to help understand how smoking affects the body and brain.

CIGARETTES?

Call for a confidential screening. All participants will be paid for time and travel.

CALLY T O DA

TOLL FREE

1-800-535-8254 www.researchstudies.drugabuse.gov


FREE WILL ASTROLOGY

BY R O B B R E Z N Y

ARIES (MARCH 21-APRIL 19) I was watching a martial arts competition on ESPN TV. It featured a fierce macho

dance-off, in which rivals took turns brandishing their high-octane warrior choreography. At one point the announcer waxed poetic as the eventual winner pulled off a seemingly impossible move: “And that was a corkscrew illusion twist rodeo spin!” In the coming week, I urge you to do something like that yourself—maybe even a few times. As you seek to take your game to a higher level, unveil your personal version of the corkscrew illusion twist rodeo spin. TAURUS (APRIL 20-MAY 20) There’s one supreme standard by which your progress in the coming weeks should

be ultimately measured: Will you understand yourself better at the end of the adventures than you do at the beginning? A new privilege may come your way, or an honor that’ll perk up your résumé, and maybe even a breakthrough that’ll help dissolve your phobia of success. But they will only manifest a fraction of their potential unless you heed my updated version of Socrates’ best soundbite: Know thyself—or else. GEMINI (MAY 21-JUNE 20) Scientists say that 90 percent of your brain is composed of fat. My own investigations have revealed, on the other hand, that less than 20 percent of your soul is made of fat. So the two balance each other out pretty well. In the coming days, however, I expect that both your brain and soul will be adding the equivalent of more lean, highly toned muscle. As a result, your mental acuity should increase as well as your spiritual insight. You’re likely to be getting smarter and wiser. I hope you will bring these growing abilities to bear on every important decision. Alone, neither is enough.

LIQUIDATIONS!! NOW All Commercial Business. LOW RATES! DNAuctioneers 443-414-2054 410-783-1846

RICH GIRL HELP ME. PO BOX 6157 Balto, MD 21231-0157

WE BUY VINTAGE Earn Extra Money Now by Selling Your Vintage Clothing! 410-244-6554 Ask for Kallie! baltimorevintageclothing.com

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

CANCER (JUNE 21-JULY 22) Born in 1822, my great-great-great grandfather Edward Dembowski was a bohemian

philosopher and columnist who led a revolutionary struggle to liberate Poland from plutocrats and foreign occupation. A feminist long before most European men entertained the issue of women’s liberation, he edited a journal that was the main organ of the “Enthusiasts,” who fought for women’s rights. He’s one of my heroes! I invite you to delve into your own ancestry to see if there are inspirational role models like Dembowski. According to my reading of the astrological omens, it’s an excellent time to activate more of your dormant genetic potentials. One good way to do that: Use your imagination to establish psychic and spiritual links to your admirable forebears. LEO (JULY 23-AUG. 22) Dating your first cousin? I don’t recommend it anytime soon. Likewise, I’m here to talk

you out of surrounding yourself with people who always agree with you, and I hope you won’t try to milk an old resource for the same help it has provided countless times. In the foreseeable future, please downplay and de-emphasize the kinds of unions that result from like attracting like. Instead, think cross-fertilization. Catalyze exotic blends, unexpected combinations, and mergers of elements that have never been mixed. VIRGO (AUG. 23-SEPT. 22) As Barack Obama’s inauguration day approached, some astrologers were aghast

that he would be taking the oath of office when the moon was void-of-course. In their eyes, this aspect is a bad portent for any new enterprise. If Obama would only postpone the oath for 35 minutes, they said, everything would be fine. He didn’t, of course. But then the improbable happened. Chief Justice John Roberts, who was administering the oath, got the wording wrong, and Obama went along with it. Scholars then speculated that the oath wasn’t fully official. The next day, when the moon was no longer void-of-course, Roberts and Obama re-did the ritual, making things right. And that’s how an apparent mistake allowed Obama to elude the curse of superstitious astrologers. A seemingly inconvenient delay in your own process will bring an equally beneficent loophole for you. LIBRA (SEPT. 23-OCT. 22) “Everything has been figured out, except how to live,” sneered the existentialist phi-

losopher Jean-Paul Sartre. That’s not completely true, of course, which he might have discovered had he not closed his dogmatically cynical mind to the countless humans (many unknown to history) whose lives have been great works of art. Starting from these thoughts, you are hereby invited to regard the next 11 months as a time when you will make your own life a masterpiece—a labor of love that is ingeniously imagined and lyrically wrought. Unseen forces and unexpected allies will come to your assistance if you do. SCORPIO (OCT. 23-NOV. 21) I’ve got three questions for you. First, where will you go next to satisfy that special

GET A NEW COMPUTER

ROCKER, ETC.

Brand Name Laptops & Desktops Bad or NO Credit – No Problem Smallest weekly payments available. It's yours NOW – Call 800-803-8819 (AAN CAN)

FURNITURE MARKETPLACE 170

BED $240 BRAND NEW KING PILLOWTOP SET in plastic w/ warranty. Can deliver. 410-982-2003

BEDS Quilted tops. New, still in plastic. Queen sz. retailed $598, sell $199. King sz. retailed $798, sell $299. 10yr/warr. Can Deliver. Financing Available. 410-598-2460

BEDS

C7HA;JFB79;

'+&#'//

COMPUTER MARKETPLACE 165

COMPUTERS FOR KIDS AND THE NEEDY! Looking for people to donate broken or unused computers that we can repair and donate to local schools and charitable organizations. 410-563-9000 r_poisson@comcast.net

www.citypaper.com UPDATED DAILY

X-THICK PILLOW TOP New in plastic. Queen Size: retailed $798, sell $279. King: retailed $998, sell $379. 10 yr warr. Can deliver. Financing avail. 410-687-5313

BRAND NEW QUEEN PILLOWTOP BED in plastic w/ warranty. $170. Can deliver. 410-982-2003

Wood & hemp rocking chair; $50. Antique sewing cabinet; $75. Call 410-366-3953 before 9 pm

ROCKING CHAIR Large, light/medium brown wood w/ 8 slots on back & extra wide seat & cushion. Cute & comfy. $95. Call 410-529-1598

MARKETPLACE MISC.

175

CEMETERY SPOTS 5 spots avail. Starting at $2000 each. Great location at Meadow Ridge Memorial Park. 443-452-1521

COCA-COLA ITEMS Old sign, 18"x54"; $300. Child's pedal car, new; $250. 410-931-8483

KITCHEN ITEMS Countertop juicer; $25. Small brown Sharp microwave w/ carousel; $40. Homeconcepts green coffee maker; $25. Small oak microwave carts on wheels; $40. Like new. Prices are negotiable. 410-783-5411

LADIES JACKETS GIRL'S BR SET Incl: twin daybed frame & mattress, box spring, Trundel bed frame & foam mattress, long dresser w/ mirror, 2 night tables, lamp, linens. $300. 443-617-2322 after 4 pm. dogmomforever@hotmail.com

LEATHER SOFA & LOVESEAT. BRAND NEW matched set. $895 443-992-2757

Black suede from the Limited, sz med; $40. Black lthr, sz med; $40. Like new, prices negotiable. 410-783-5411

LAWN MOWER Cordless Black & Decker push mower, mulches, has quick start / electric start & 19" cut. Battery operated, works great! $155. Costs over $400 new. Call 410-529-1598

LULU EIGHTBALL

EMILY FLAKE

need of yours—you know, the need that demands ever-fresh varieties of fuel? Second, who will you enlist in your ongoing efforts to change your environment so that it’s more compatible with your drives? And third, what helpful influences will you seek to attract into your sphere as you upgrade and refine your ambitions? The coming weeks will be a good time to cultivate your web of alliances as you address these questions. SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 22-DEC. 21) A substantial fraction of the world’s scientists are funded by the military. This saddens me. I wish we lived on a planet where most scientists were in service to peace and plenty, working to solve social and environmental problems. But corrupt exploitations of the scientific method are no excuse for me to banish it from my repertoire. I use it frequently. Likewise, I draw tremendous inspiration from the life and teachings of Christ, even though I don’t belong to a Christian church and am distraught about the devastation wrought by the fundamentalist mindset. Would you consider applying this approach to your personal life? For example, maybe you could come to a new appreciation of your parents’ gifts without losing sight of the ways they messed you up. Or perhaps you could forgive your heroes for their slight lack of integrity, or borrow good ideas from a way of looking at the world that partly offends you. CAPRICORN (DEC. 22-JAN. 19) You may find it hard to believe that imprecise language could undermine your

ability to merge with your heart’s desire. But it’s true. Your biggest wish may never be fully granted as long as you’re lazy or sloppy about how you articulate it. Try this: Write down a brief statement that crisply sums up the one experience you want more than anything else in life. Preface it with this assertion: “I am doing everything possible to accomplish the following goal.” Memorize this magic formula and repeat it twice a day until your wish is fulfilled, even if that takes 10 years. P.S. It will work best if you don’t include anything about how certain people need to change in order for your longing to be fulfilled. AQUARIUS (JAN. 20-FEB. 18) “What is a weed?” asked Ralph Waldo Emerson. “A plant whose virtues have not

yet been discovered.” Your assignment is to identify a weed-like thing in your life whose rich possibilities have not yet been fully realized. Bear in mind, as you ruminate, that there are some weed-like things that would not be particularly valuable even if you did ultimately tease out their full potential. Your task is to find a weed whose transformation into a plant will be especially useful to your unique needs. PISCES (FEB. 19-MARCH 20) Many Americans believe China is a society that puts an abnormally high emphasis on keeping its citizens in line through punishment. But the truth is that only 1.2 percent of China’s 1.3 billion people are in the slammer, whereas the United States has jailed 7.7 percent of its population of 300 million. In other words, my home country has a much higher percentage of our people behind bars than they do. I bring this to your attention as a prod to free some of the parts of yourself that you’ve imprisoned. Declare amnesty for the miscast captives and repressed workers within you. Bring the level down from the U.S. rate of incarceration to the Chinese level. ■ HOMEWORK: DO YOU KNOW PRECISELY WHAT YOU NEED IN ORDER TO FEEL PRETTY GOOD MOST OF THE TIME? IF NOT, GO ON A QUEST TO FIND OUT.

citypaper.com

FEBRUARY

4,

2009

city paper | 73


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VEGAS PASSPORTS

Xo CWjj @ed[i

2 Las Vegas VIP club-hopping party packages for sale. 28 passes per pkg. You can cut lines, pass velvet ropes & access the hottest clubs! Good through '09. Total value $260, you can have them both for $200. 410-800-8287

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4 SALE Household items & furniture: lvg rm set, dinette set, twin beds, queen beds. Baby items: crib, chg table, games, toys & movies. TVs: 19" & 13" color. Misc: 2 walkers, bath spa, silverware, cookware, towels & hand cloths, metal cabinet, bike carrier, dishwasher, window fans, fridge, electric stove, women's clothes size 16/18 & 14/12. Washer/dryer electric, sheet sets, queen & twin comforters & other misc items. Before 10am @ 410-265-6793. Leave msg after 10am

PETS MARKETPLACE

CHIHUAHUA PUPPIES 4 Sale: 1 female, white, $875 & 1 male, buff w/ white marking, $825 firm. Both with America's Pet Registry Paper & Vet Checked. Available for delivery October 18, 2008. Contact Ms. Nancy @ 410-265-6793

* >ee#^Wi + <hWkÊi ZecW_d , 8WhWYa EXWcWÊi I[Yh[jWho e\ ;ZkYWj_ed UUU :kdYWd - 9_jo cWf b_d[i0 WXXh$ . 8beki[" [$]$ / <h[[" _d b[]Wb Y_hYb[i '& Ç=[j UUU" oek jme È '' >_]^#ijhkd] '( ()#WYheiiÊi 9?7 Yekdj[hfWhj '* J^[o jWa[ kf ifWY[ _d j^[ d[mifWf[h '+ B[Wao hWZ_Wjeh de_i[ '- ÇJ^[ =_hbi D[nj :eehÈ cW]dWj[" \Wc_b_Whbo (' =_b m^e fbWo[Z 8kYa He][hi (( ?d W ]hWdZ mWo () M[ij 9eWij iY^$ m_j^ W i_ij[h YWcfki _d 8[ha[b[o (* 7kjecWa[h ^[WZgkWhj[h[Z _d Jhebb^WjjWd" Im[Z[d (+ >Wk]^jo (, 9ekdjho i_d][h 7hdebZ WdZ h[]]W[ i_d][h =hWdj" \eh jme (- Ijef ed UUU

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©2008 Jonesin’ Crosswords (editor@jonesincrosswords.com) For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle #0399.

74 | city paper

FEBRUARY

185

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FREE CAT To a new home. "Baby Cat" is full grown but looks like a kitty. We're moving, so we have to find her a new home. She's very sweet & loves being petted. Would be great for a single cat family or individual. 410-366-3005

PIT BULL PUPS Looking for a new home. 1st shots & dewormed. Call for more info 410-419-3153 kelkel5403@gmail.com

SHAR-PEI PUPPIES We have 2 apricot colored male shar-pei puppies avail to a loving family. The puppies were born on Dec 14, 2008 & can be an addition to your family by Feb 8, 2009. The mother is CKC registered & the father is AKC registered. We are located in Severn, MD & if interested, please call for more information. 410-491-2071 email: gecko2825@hotmail.com

De" oek ZedÊj ^Wl[ je jWa[ oekh Ybej^[i e\\ je fbWo Ijh_f IkZeak$ @kij Óbb [WY^ igkWh[ _d j^_i ]h_Z m_j^ W Z_]_j \hec ' je / ie j^Wj" Wi _d W ijWdZWhZ ikZeak" de Z_]_j _i h[f[Wj[Z _d Wdo hem" Yebkcd" eh )n) Xen Wi cWha[Z e\\ Xo i^WZ_d] _d j^[ ]h_Z $ ;WY^ j^h[[#igkWh[ ijh_f Wi cWha[Z e\\ Xo ^[Wlo XbWYa b_d[i YedjW_di Wd I" C" WdZ B#cWha[Z igkWh[" m^_Y^ ijWdZ \eh icWbb" c[Z_kc" WdZ bWh][$ J^[ I m_bb X[ j^[ icWbb[ij e\ j^[ j^h[[ Z_]_ji _d _ji ijh_f" j^[ C m_bb X[ j^[ c_ZZb[ Z_]_j" WdZ j^[ B m_bb X[ j^[ bWh][ij Z_]_j$ Dem iebl[ fioY^eikZeak6^ejcW_b$Yec

4, 2009

citypaper.com

COCKAPOOS Yorkipoos, Maltipoos, Puggles, Labs, Boxers, Chihuahuas, Shepherds, Mini Pins & cute mixed puppies. $175 & up. 717-548-4291 lic. knl

Hi Emily, Because of last week's ad, we have filled the two positions already. We definitely got great ad response from your publication and will certainly be using City Paper for up and coming positions. Thanks! Heidi, Maples at Towson

MAKE YOUR AD STAND OUT! Add your company's logo to your Classified Line ad! Call Nicole at 443-452-1522 for details


M;BBD;II

)&&#)//

(&&#(// BAIL BOND SERVICES

207

A NEW BEGINNING BAIL BONDS Serving the state of MD, 24 hrs a day, 7 days a week. Quick & reliable service. Call Larry at 410-462-1488 or Chris at 443-621-3376 or Rob at 443-857-8520

J-BIRD BAIL BONDS

FINANCIAL SERVICES

235

BURIED IN CREDIT CARD DEBT? We can save you thousands and lower your monthly payments. Call Debt Relief hotline for your free consultation. 1-800-399-3560 (AAN CAN)

215

CLEANING TO PERFECTION Residential & sm Bus, Insured. References. 410-292-4873

COMPUTER/WEB SERVICES 220

GET A NEW COMPUTER!

HOME IMPROVEMENTS - LIC. 245

Brand name laptops & desktops. Bad or NO credit – no problem. Smallest weekly payments avail. CALL NOW 1-800-816-2232 (AAN CAN)

EDUCATIONAL SERVICES

AIR-TECH Refrigeration & Mechanical *Heating *Air Conditioning *Refrigeration *Plumbing Sales & Service *We service & sell all brands of equipment *Specialize in installing duct systems in older homes 410-335-3660 24 hrs a day, 7 days a week.*Professional, quality service *Affordable prices * Free estimates given on all new systems* HVAC/R #10230 Financing Avail

230

HIGH SCHOOL DIPLOMA! Fast, Affordable & Accredited. FREE Brochure. Call NOW! 1-800-532-6546 ext. 97 http://www.continentalacademy.com (AAN CAN)

THE LEARNING COACH Academic Help for Middle Grades Unique, affordable academic support. Organizational & reading plus support & tutorials for content area classes. Masters/MSDE cert. 1-877-673-7084 www.thelearningcoach.info

Reliable service. Snow plow & trash removal. Houses, yards, garages & bsmts. Reasonable rates, senior discounts. $20 & up. 443-804-6744

TREE SERVICES

256

Free Estimates. Basements, Garages, Yard Work, Complete House Clean-up, Appliances, Furniture, & Hauling. 410-984-7032

LIGHT MOVING & HAULING Reasonable Rates. Fast Response. Call 410-752-5155 (Leave message)

LEGAL SERVICES

260

NEED LEGAL HELP?

RICHARDSON HAULING Remove trash, unwanted furniture, tear down sheds. Free estimates. Call Lynn 410-218-1077 email haulingman@comcast.net

Don't know where to start? Make the right call, for the right lawyer… Bar Association of Baltimore City LAWYER REFERRAL & INFORMATION SERVICE 410-539-3112

MOVING/HAULING/DEMOLITION & Towing. Cheap! For low income. Short notice. Personal service, over 30 yrs exp. Insured. 410-327-8993

CLASSIFIEDS UPDATED DAILY AT WWW.CITYPAPER.COM

PLACE YOUR CLASSIFIED LINE AD 24/7 AT WWW.CITYPAPER.COM

THOMAS

T'S HAULING/MOVING Will clean basements, yards, etc. Will move your possessions or haul them away. Very reliable & reasonable. 410-889-3795 or 443-690-6525

4 LESS MOVERS

MIND, BODY & SPIRIT

HANNAH

WOMEN'S

Why settle for the rest when you can have the best 4 less? We move it all! Serving the Baltimore/ DC area. Free estimates, call us now: 410-963-3349

PET CARE

270

GROWTH CENTER

Counseling for women & men, couples, families, plus women's therapy group. Sliding fee scale, some insurance. Call, lv message. 410-532-2GROW (2476)

MIDDAY DOG WALKING

Free Estimates. We Do Remodeling and All Types of Home Repairs & Plumbing. Bathroom, Kitchen, Basement, Hardwood Floor and Tile, etc. We Accept Visa and Mastercard! 5% Discount for First Time Customers and 10% for Senior Citizens! Call 410-466-6147 or 877-526-KIMA MHIC#: 94997 remkimahomeimprovement.com

WE FINISH JOBS OTHER PEOPLE STARTED! All phases of construction. 40 Years Experience. Call 410-615-6005

Don’t buy a new one, save the one you have!

SERVICES MISCELLANEOUS 290

7HJI"CKI?9 ;DJ;HJ7?DC;DJ

*&&#*//

ADT SECURITY HOME SECURITY SYSTEMS Starting at $99 Serving Baltimore City & Counties Call David Miller at 443-514-8583

B. CHIC INTERIORS Design. Decorate. Stage. Specializing in row homes.

ENTERTAINMENT SHOWPLACE 412

SHORT FILM COMPETITION Grand Prize $1000 ($2500 IN TOTAL AWARDS) Entries due 15 February 2009 For more information: www.Rumschpringe.com

MUSICIANS WANTED 410-963-4884 http://bchicinteriors.shutterfly.com/

IKFFEHJ

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A;;F CED;O ?D 8CEH; NEED AUTO INSURANCE?

Total computer wellness starting at $40

Call Computer Express partz@comcast.net

410-925-1248

Company has 5yrs exp. competitive rates, friendly service, free Consultation. 336-575-0575

Kitchen & Bath renovations, Decks, Drywall, Tile. Lic & Bonded. No job too big or too small! 410-814-7293

REM KIMA HOME IMPROVEMENT

330

Reunites lovers. Overpowers negativity. Removes obstacles. Helps in all problems in life in 1 hour. Licd/certified.1-800-899-1042

HOME IMPROVEMENT SPECIALISTS

SICK COMPUTER?

410-563-9000

265

ALL YOUR JUNK!!!

We buy Gold, Silver, Plat. Get Cash NOW! Highest Payouts – Satisfaction Guaranteed. 1-877-548-1550 (AAN CAN)

HEATING & AIR CONDITIONING 240

MOVING/HAULING

A 1-- 2 -- 3 HAULING

A+ HANDYMAN Roofing, carpentry/finish carpentry, decks, ceramic tile, plumbing, kitchens, baths, windows & floors. Free estimates! 443-528-3867

CASH FOR GOLD

IT'S BETTER TO KNOW US AND NOT NEED US, THEN TO NEED US AND NOT KNOW US 410-366-BAIL (2245)

CLEANING SERVICES

HOME IMPROVEMENTS - MISC. 250

BANDS WANTED The Red House Tavern, Canton is looking for live Bands. Call 410-522-2310 Leave a Message

BASS PLAYER For Theophany, a progressive original rock fusion band. Vocals a plus. Please, must be able to play! Call 410-627-8078 or email froggleggs312@comcast.net

DRUMMER WANTED For the U.S. Army's Premier Touring Show Band. $49,029 - $55,275 annually plus full Army benefits. See: www.armyfieldband.com Call 301-677-5781

LEAD GUITARIST Looking for enthusiastic Rock Musicians. Attitude & Drive wanted. Influences: AC/DC, Black Sabbath, Led Zeppelin, Rolling Stones. 410-285-0335. Ask for Dave

SEE GINA ZINN’S AD ON PAGE 82! citypaper.com

415

FEBRUARY

SINGERS & SONGWRITERS Pop/R&B or Gospel Needed. Call Dee 410-428-7338

4,

2009

city paper | 75


REHEARSAL SPACE

425

BAND LAND $250-$400/month. 443-831-2263 Heat incld. www.bandrehearsal.net

RECORD LABELS/STUDIOS

430

MALE WITCH Psychic readings and counseling. Spells cast and removed. 24/7. Credit/Debit. 800-419-3346 GET YOUR LOVER BACK

PIANO, VOICE LESSONS & VOCAL COACHING Get lessons from an experienced University of Maryland graduate who has been teaching for 9 years! Flexible scheduling & competitive rates! All ages welcome, all skill levels encouraged! Call Stephanie at 301-751-7776 or email her at jimmorrison27@hotmail.com for more info.

DATE/CHAT LINES

505

ALL MALE HOT GAY HOOKUPS!

ADULT MARKETPLACE

513

HOST TOY PARTY Host an adult toy party. Get ready for Valentine's Day! Hostess receives free gift and a $50 gift card. To book or become a consultant, call 240-671-6212 or email keenamartin@pureromance.com

g n i k o o L for g n i h t e som

Call 410-986-4343 FREE w/ code: 1261 18+

CHAT, MEET AND FLIRT! Call: 410-986-4300 Try FREE! Use code 7135 Or 800-210-1010 18+

HOT GUYS! HOT CHAT! HOT FUN!

7:KBJI

Call 410-986-4343 FREE w/ code: 1261 18+

+&&#+// PSYCHIC LINES

< D OA

CITY PAPER = RESULTS!

500

Call Emily at 443-452-1521 to place your ad today!

MEET HOT LOCALS Listen & Reply FREE! Straight 410-230-2600 Gay & Bi 410-468-4000 Use Free Code 7223, 18+

MEN, CONNECT. EASY. Gay, str8, curious, bi. The most exciting "for men only" phone line. Instant live action at 443-738-0644 18+ Free Trial

CLASSIFIEDS UPDATED DAILY AT WWW.CITYPAPER.COM

TURN 422,000 READERS INTO YOUR CUSTOMERS! Advertise your Service for just $25 per week when you book 4 weeks or more. *Includes headline & 4 lines of text. Call 410-523-3100 to place your ad today!

VISIT US AT

CITYPAPER.LOVEACCESS.COM

RECORDING STUDIO FOR RENT Totally soundproof recording studio, Wired & ready to occupy. Call Musicians Institute of Baltimore for more info 410-661-6848

DISC JOCKEYS

435

KICK PRODUCTIONS DJs for Special Occasions with years of exp. Specializing in Oldies Music. Quotes based upon 4 hrs. Call 443-846-1825

MUSIC LESSONS

440

SE ND ME SS AG ES

FREE PSYCHIC AND TAROT READING Online: www.sostarots.com or by telephone: 1-866-800-4775 (AAN CAN)

LEXUS PSYCHIC READER, MEDIUM 20 years experience. Asks no questions. 1-877-272-2700 ext. 884. (AAN CAN)

BY AARON ZVI All ages and skill levels. Classical, Folk, Rock, Blues, Theory, Vocals. Years of teaching and performing experience. BS from Towson University and Graduate work at Peabody. $40 per hour. Call 410-409-0738 or email aaronzvilw@yahoo.com

76 | city paper

BALT IMO RE 410. 230. 2600 443. 703. 3333 Colu mbia Aber deen Esse x Was hing ton DC

WHERE LOCAL SINGLES MEET Browse & Respond FREE! Straight 410-230-2600 Gay & Bi 410-468-4000 Use Free Code 6541 Or Visit MegaMates.com, 18+

all levels - folk, blues, jazz

GUITAR LESSONS

minu te othe r dati ng lines char ge by the

Add your company's logo to your Classified Line ad! Call Nicole at 443-452-1522 for details

443. 430. 3300 443. 558. 0500 443. 815. 0800 202. 558. 0558

ates For other cities call (888) MegaM

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ates For other cities call (888) MegaM

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FEBRUARY

4, 2009

citypaper.com


MobilePay! Text “LAVA� to 25552. 10 mins. for $9.99

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Photography by Kevin E. McPherson

citypaper.com

FEBRUARY

4,

2009

city paper | 77


5PUBM #PEZ

HEALTH CENTER

:

&VSPQFBO "NFSJDBO 4QB

410-663-1010

“Best Staff & Services in Baltimore!�

i˜½ĂƒĂŠ7>Ă?ˆ˜}ĂŠ Ă›>ˆÂ?>LÂ?iĂŠUĂŠ ÂœĂŒĂŠ-ĂŒÂœÂ˜iĂŠEĂŠ >cials

Enjoy Japanese Style Body Work 443-889-3906 by Appt. Only

NON-SEXUAL

681/,*+7 63$ 4XFEJTI %FFQ 5JTTVF .BTTBHF

695 to Ex.20, Continue N 5 mls, On left OPEN 7 DAYS 11am-12 MIDNIGHT

"DVQVODUVSF "DDVQSFTTVSF

0QFO EBZT 'SFF QBSLJOH JO SFBS

443-299-9900

+EO7BJO

$

10 off with this ad

410.948.2055 Open 7 days a week 10am-11pm 2808 E Joppa Rd Towson, MD 31B-Harford Rd, make left on Joppa Rd. 1/2 mile down on right side.

Specialist in Body Treatments, Acupressure & Reexology

HSBOE!PQFOJOH 2313!Zpsl!Se-!Mvuifswjmmf

521.923.5253

Bqqpjounfout0Xbml.jot-!21bn.22qn Cpez0Njoe!ifbmjoh!gvmm!nbttbhf Opx!Ijsjoh

Best American European Spa

Facials Waxing Saturday & Sunday Specials

5831 ½ Belair Rd. Baltimore, MD 21206 695 Exit 32 A

Appointments/Walk-Ins Welcome

Health Center Relaxing Spa

Enjoy All American Staff

Appointments/ Walk-ins, M-F 10-9, Sat & Sun 12-9

• Professional Massage • Foot Rub • Shower

8307 Liberty Road Randallstown, MD 21244 Open 7 days 9 a.m.- 12 Midnight

GRAND OPENING!

UĂŠ*Ă€ÂœviĂƒĂƒÂˆÂœÂ˜>Â?ĂŠ >ĂƒĂƒ>}i UĂŠ-ĂŒi>“ÊEĂŠ ÀÞÊ->Ă•Â˜>ĂŠ Ă›>ˆÂ?ˆ>LÂ?it "ÂŤi˜\ 7 days a week £äĂŠ>“ʇʣ£Ê“ Ăˆx™äĂŠ"Â?`ĂŠ7>ĂŒiĂ€Â?ÂœÂœĂŠ,`°ĂŠ­,ĂŒ°ĂŠ£änÂŽĂŠ Â?ÂŽĂ€Âˆ`}i]ĂŠ ĂŠĂ“£äÇx (Inside Lark Brown Shopping Center) non-sexual

NONSEXUAL

PHOENIX SPA

1SPGFTTJPOBM .BTTBHF 'PPU 3VC "OE 4IPXFS

8BML JOT 8FMDPNF

8303 Philadelphia Rd. White Marsh.

695 to Ex 34 Right on Philadelphia Rd. Continue 1 mile on left. NON-SEXUAL. Visa,MC,Amex

Enjoy Japanese style body work

HIRING

Relaxing!

410.391.5332

443-995-7208

!)& ( " &." (. ,

non-sexual

Body Works ASK ABOUT OUR NEW LOWER RATES

White Cloud

OPO.TFYVBM

410-252-0203

Open 7 days 10am-11pm

£äĂŽxĂŠ ˜}Â?iĂƒÂˆ`iĂŠ Ă›i°ĂŠUĂŠ >ĂŒÂœÂ˜ĂƒĂ›ÂˆÂ?Â?i]ĂŠ ĂŠĂ“ÂŁĂ“Ă“n œ˜‡ Ă€Âˆ]ĂŠÂŁÂŁ>“‡™“ÊUĂŠ->ĂŒ]ĂŠÂŁÂŁ>“‡n“

Massage Universe

2430 2430 York York Rd Rd Timonium, Timonium, MD MD

410-227-3328

443-612-9990

non-sexual

ESCAPE SPA

§ Professional massage therapy * Swedish § Foot rub & Foot care * Shower § Exotic Body Works

Our beautiful All American Princesses are now available for your relaxation needs.

Off 695 to exit 18 1 mile west on left

non-sexual

7 days a week 8am-11pm 7510 Bel Air Rd., Baltimore, MD 21236 695 to exit 32A. Turn into tint shop and park in rear

Oasis spa

Non-sexual

Non-Sexual

Asian Acupressure • Shiatsu Massage

non-sexual

Green Ocean Oriental Health Center

3FJTUFSTUPXO 3E 1JLFTWJMMF .% -PDBUFE PGG &YJU 4PVUI

/PO 4FYVBM

Exotic Japanese Staff

10712 Reisterstown Rd., Ste. #200–Owings Mills

nxä™Ê ÂœVÂ…ĂŠ,>Ă›iÂ˜ĂŠ Â?Ă›`ĂŠUĂŠ/ÂœĂœĂƒÂœÂ˜ĂŠUĂŠ£ä>“‡£äÂ“ĂŠUĂŠ ÂœĂœĂŠÂ…ÂˆĂ€ÂˆÂ˜}

'VMM #PEZ 3VC

Grand Opening

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C O N C E P T S

9". 12". 01&/ %":4 " 8&&, Now Hiring experienced professionals

Parking Available

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OPO TFYVBM

#MVF 4LZ )FBMUI ] 8BML JOT XFMDPNF BACO THERAPY Specializing in Swedish massage, deep tissue, and reexology

BN° QN /0/ 4&96"-

Hiring FT & PT Licensed Massage Therapist 1707 Reisterstown Rd. Pikesville, MD 21208. 695 to exit 20 South. Turn left at ďŹ rst stoplight.

Qspgfttjpobm!Mjdfotfe!Uifsbqjtu

BACO THERAPY MASSAGE ÂŚ!Txfejti!ÂŚ!Effq!Ujttvf!ÂŚ!Bddvqsfttvsf ÂŚ!Ipu!Tbvob!ÂŚ!Tipxfs

521.419.:141

Uvsg!Wjmmbhf!ÂŚ!3411!Zpsl!Se/!Tvjuf!329!ÂŚ!Ujnpojvn! )Ofbs!7:6!'!J.94*!Ofyu!up!Tubuf!Gbjs!Hspvoet Xbml.jot!'!Bqqpjounfout!ÂŚ!Pqfo!8!Ebzt!21BN!.!Njeojhiu Wjtb!ÂŚ!ND!ÂŚ!Bnfy NON-SEXUAL

â?¤www.citypaper.kaango.com â?¤

78 | city paper

FEBRUARY

4, 2009

citypaper.com


MASSAGE & RELAXATION

515

AAAAA A-1 4 U

AAAAA A+ CLASS

BLONDE BEAUTY

Balto's Beauties, Wkday Specials. 410-737-8078 Nonsexual

Tall & Sexy. Outs daily. Ins Mon Fri. Call for availability. NO hagglers! 410-725-8320 Nonsexual

ALL FETISHES

Sexy chicks naughty tricks. Call for Specials. 410-633-2787 Nonsexual

Slaves Desired.Busty&Spontaneous. Call 443-834-0594 Nonsexual

ASIA HEALTH

PLACE YOUR CLASSIFIED LINE AD 24/7 AT WWW.CITYPAPER.COM

Enjoy a relaxing hour in the east 410-258-1218 nonsexual

ch oothing Tou E 4OUCH %VERYONE $ESIRES

S

4H

Dem >_h_d] <J%FJ

kfb[i M[bYec[ C[d" Mec[d 9e [j š Fh_lWj[ h[ CeZ[hd š :_iY ffe_djc[dj [ eh YWbb \eh Wd W MWba#_di m[bYec _ed š <H;; FWha_d] F_a[il_bb[ BeYWj

.E W 3TAFF .E W

=H;7J H7J;I

. E W ! T TI TUD E S &A C ES

BLONDE PLAYMATE Pretty, Classy, Engaging. Fetishes Welcome!! Every Man's fantasy come true You WILL ME. Val Specials. All cc's accepted. 443-789-1554 Non-sexual

IMPORTANT COMICS

MONA LISA

DINA KELBERMAN

Professional, private & discreet. Appt. Only Owings Mills /Reisterstown area. 443-622-7903 Nonsexual

QUEEN OF

S

Your Choice of Upscale Ladies. 443-965-5076 Nonsexual

TYLER

BRAZILIAN BOMBSHELL

Tall, Dark, Handsome, 6'3", athletic build. 443-271-2037 Nonsexual

Come, relax w/ this Brazilian model. Discreet loc, Owings Mills. Non rushed. CC accptd. 7a-12a Layla 443-739-5528 Nonsexual

SHEMALE/TRANSGENDERED 518

BRITTANY Enjoy a very soothing & relaxing sensual experience. 410-977-3822. Nonsexual

COURTNEY 24 y.o., Af Am 5'4, 125 lbs. Pikesville area. 443-604-3353 Nonsexual

CedZWo# <h_ZWo ''W#/f š IWjkhZWo ''W#-f

ded#i[nkWb CdchZmjVa

DREAM GIRL

@DM

Ginger Upscale, Elite College Co-Ed. Come spice up your life with me and relax! Owings Mills location. 443-824-1996 In/Out 10 AM- 8 PM Nonsexual

Relaxation & Stress Relief, Hot Stone, Massage & Asian Body Work, Hot Towels

From 695, Take Exit 26B From I-83, Take Exit 17 East Call for Directions

410-615-1226

JENN & TIFF

Appointments Preferred Now Hiring FT/PT License Req’d. 7-Day trial

DISCOUNTED RATES BEFORE 7PM

10

$

OFF

New Location 2413 York Rd., Timonium, MD 21093 In Basement

Towson U. Students. Come Relax with us. Dual Tech Relaxation. 443-977-2822. Nonsexual

1-HOUR MASSAGE

Before 7PM Expires Feb. 11

MISSY

nonsexual

7SYP

100% Smoking Hot T-girl 410-522-8928 Nonsexual

MY PRIVATE JET Mind blowing encounter. 100% passable with amazing fem Physique & fully loaded. 5'8" 145, 34B-24-36. Safe & Discreet locale 443-453-2503 Nonsexual

TGIRL SURPRISE Ask for 1 or 2 TGirls. Soft & Young. 443-452-5228 Nonsexual

Please call 443-519-9300 Nonsexual

Dolphin Wellness Center NEW! NEW! NEW! Oriental Traditional Body Work Fresh Acupressure

Please call to ďŹ nd out more. Prices Will Surprise You! s /PEN AM PM $AYS .ON 3EXUAL %AST *OPPA 2OAD s 4OWSON -$ $IRECTIONS 7EST EXIT " ! TO ,OCH 2AVEN "LVD s %AST EXIT " TO ,OCH 2AVEN "LVD -AKE 2IGHT ON % *OPPA 2D

ASIAN FLOWERS HEALTH CENTER Professional massage therapy featuring full body massage, acupressure and shower.

&SH][SVOW &SH] Baltimore Area 8766 Philadelphia Rd. Take Exit 34 Left on Philadelphia Rd. 3rd Light on Left Hand Side. Lower Level.

10am-11pm 7 Days A Week 410-940-9569

443-756-0688 Nonsexual

Non-sexual

CITYPAPER.

KAANGO.COM

&SH] &SH

NEW JAPANESE STAFF Open 7 days 9am-12am 5864 Belair Rd. Baltimore, MD 21206 Off 695 ext 32A 2 miles South of Beltway

BLAZING HOTTIE

E G A SS A M ER P A P Y T I C

ON w ww

.cit

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FEBRUARY

4,

2009

om

city paper | 79


FEBRUARY

4, 2009

★★★ CLASSIFIED ONLINE AT W W W.CITYPAPER.K A ANGO.COM ★★★ ★★★ 812 Park Ave., Baltimore, MD 21201 • classified@citypaper.com ★★★

To Advertise Your Business in Baltimore’s Best Automotive Section, Contact Bettina Wachter at 443.452.1532 or bwachter@citypaper.com

AUTOMOTIVE 80 | city paper

citypaper.com

IT’S THE BEGINNING

OF THE YEAR

SAVINGS! CHECK OUT CITY PAPER AUTOS AT WWW.CITYPAPER.COM AND CLICK ON CLASSIFIEDS AND SCROLL DOWN TO AUTOMOTIVE

With all this talk about the Big 3, sinking sales, and the stock market woes, why should you even consider buying a vehicle? The reason, simply put - BARGAINS!! Right now, dealerships are offering unprecedented deals on inventory. New car prices have been slashed, some offer thousands off MSRP, and pre-owned trucks and SUVs are at record low prices, an extra sweet deal since we are currently in the winter months. Let's talk about interest rates! Some new car dealerships are offering 0% financing, some for up to 60 months! Used car interest rates are in the single digits! NOW IS THE TIME TO BUY! Another reason - the end of the month is rapidly approaching. The end of month is traditionally the best time to buy (a dealer wants to move its inventory on a monthly basis, so the incentives to buy are much greater). Even better? It's the beginning of the year savings! Dealers want to sell all remaining current year vehicles, turning the normal end of year deals into consumer steals.

Remember! Beginning of the year is the time to BUY - NOT SHOP. You can always view (or "shop") inventory online (check out City Paper autos at www.citypaper.kaango.com) but when you arrive in person be prepared to strike a deal and drive away that day in a vehicle. Rates are great, local lenders (banks) are eager to lend $$ and there are some AMAZING DEALS! While some lending standards have tightened up, it's not impossible to overcome!

THE BARGAINS ARE EVERYWHERE!

L;>?9B;I

-&&#-// CARS

705

$500 POLICE IMPOUNDS! Cars/Trucks from $500. For listings, call 1-800-585-3563 ext. 2736

BUY HERE, PAY HERE, FILE HERE! File your taxes here…drive out today! Auto Mall 410-483-2277

CHEVROLET

'04 IMPALA Only 27k mi. Blue. PL, PW, cd, V6. Great on gas! MD inspct'd. Asking $11,900, entertaining all offers! Call Larry 443-621-2809

CHRYSLER

'07 SEBRING 4 dr, PL, PW, cd, very clean, lots of TLC. One owner. Must see to believe! Call Larry for best offer price. 443-621-2809

CHRYSLER

'97 CONCORD Loaded, good cond. $1700 OBO. Call or lv msg 443-682-7503

HONDA

'91 CIVIC DX model, auto, 4 dr, AC, PS. Still running, needs some work. Can use as parts car. As is. $1000 OBO. 410-383-1338

HYUNDAI

'07 AZERA Limited! Top of the line, only 30k mi. V6, lthr, dual pwr heated seats, sunrf, 6 cd in-dash. Like new. Orig $35k, asking $20k OBO. Must sell! 443-621-2809

HYUNDAI

'07 ELANTRA Low mileage. No credit checks. We finance. $12,900. Call the Auto Mall…410-483-2277

MITSUBISHI

'95 ECLIPSE GS model, red, auto w/ OD. 125k mi. PW, PL, pwr mirrors, airbags, 16" alloy rims, spoiler, new brakes. Runs great. $2650. 443-799-7021

NEED A VEHICLE? Let us do your taxes! Use your refund as a down payment! Call today…410-483-2277

NISSAN '05 ALTIMA SL model, blck w/ tan lthr. Auto, PS, PW, PL, sunrf. Bose 6-cd changer. Under 34.5k mi. Sirius sat radio. Approx 28 mpg. KBB is $17,535. Asking $13,500. 410-258-1713 brookenicole19@hotmail.com

PONTIAC

'69 FIREBIRD

So, jump online, figure out what vehicle you want and get over to your local dealer and find some of the best bargains in Baltimore!

All original # matching car. 65k orig mi. 350 CI 350 turbo transmission. Runs & drives but needs partial restoration. Reduced to $4500 firm. Serious calls only 410-947-5733


CARS

705

TOYOTA

'02 COROLLA LE model. 93k mi. PL, PW. AM/FM/ CD. Affordable payments. Auto Mall…410-483-2277

TOYOTA

'07 MATRIX Under 30k mi! Rare! Bright red, PL, PW, 4 dr hatch, cd, one owner. Can provide vehicle history. One of the best selling compacts around! Call inspect & finance. Call Larry 443-621-2809

www.citypaper.com UPDATED DAILY TOYOTA

'91 CAMRY WAGON Station wagon model. Auto, AC, all pwr, CC. Inspected. Runs great. Excel cond in & out. Negotiable price. 410-522-8773

VOLKSWAGEN

'01 CABRIO Low mileage. $7200. No credit checks. Great condition! We finance! Call today 410-483-2277

SUV’S

710

CHEVROLET

'05 TRAILBLAZER 49k mi. Looks great! We finance. No credit checks. Auto Mall… 410-483-2277

FORD

NISSAN

FORD

'94 LAND ROVER

'03 EXPLORER

Red, 164k mi, excel body, runs but needs engine work. As is, $1500. Call Brittany at 443-416-8878

XLT model, one owner, can provide vehicle history. Willing to MD inspect. PL, PW, cd, alum wheels, can help w/ financing. Asking $9,999 OBO. Call Larry 443-621-2809

NOW OFFERING TAX REFUND SERVICES! File today…drive out today! Auto Mall 410-483-2277

FORD

'07 EXPEDITION XLT 4x4, PL, PW, pwr seats. Black. Can provide history. Must sell! Can help finance! Extra seating at extra low price! Call Larry 443-621-2809

www.citypaper.com UPDATED DAILY JEEP

'06 COMMANDER 35k mi. Bring your W-2s! Use your refund as a down payment! Call the Auto Mall…410-483-2277

MAZDA

'08 TRIBUTE PL, PW, cd, alum wheels, one owner. Great gas mileage! Factory warranty transfers! Was $26k, asking $15,900! Must sell! Can help w/ financing. Call Mr. Bouldin 443-621-2809

'04 EXPLORER XLT TRUCKS & VANS

711

FILE YOUR TAXES HERE…DRIVE OUT TODAY! Use your refund as your down payment! Easy financing…NO credit checks! Auto Mall 410-483-2277

Low miles! PW, PL, cd, can MD inspect. Alum wheels, beautiful blue. One owner, can assist financing. Asking $11,100. Larry 443-621-2809

HEMI, CUSTOM RIMS '05 Dodge Ram. 46k mi. $10,500. Auto Mall 410-483-2277

GOVAN’S AUTO RENTAL LOW RATES +,&( OEHA H: *'&$*,*$'(-/

*

719 North Point Blvd. Baltimore, MD 21237 Corner of North Point & Erdman

AUTO MALL 410-483-CARS (2277)

OVER 100 VEHICLES TO CHOOSE FROM! Introducing

TAX MAX

Bring you 08' W-2's & we will complete your tax returns & your refund turns into your down payment! Call Denise

Auto Rentals

choose from

DAILY, WEEKLY & MONTHLY RATES

‘99-’01

Grand Marquis starting from $65

(Credit card not required)

no credit?

‘99 - ‘04

* CALL FOR DETAILS

CREDIT CARDS ARE ACCEPTED

NNN%:@KPG8G<I% B88E>F%:FD

Are you tired of being turned down? 2 to

TODAY for details!!

CA$H

per week Are you tired of being told you have no credit?

‘00-‘04 Chevrolet

Sonata

Impala

4 to choose from

WE RENT FOR CASH!!

G&N

CAR RENTAL 2ND LOCATION NOW OPEN! 6660 Security Blvd. Suite 5 (Meadows Shopping Center)

443-429-5089 redit All Major C rds & Debit ca ! accepted

NO Credit Check NO Credit Card Required NO Insurance Needed

701 W. 34th St. Baltimore, MD 21211 2 min. from Rotunda & Druid Hill Park

443-874-7992

starting from $50

per week

bankruptcy?

‘95-‘02 Ford

starting from $50

‘94-‘03

Windstar

per week Have you recently had a repo or bankruptcy?

Hondas 4 to choose from

starting from $50

per week

starting from $65

per week

BUY HERE • PAY HERE IF YOU ARE EMPLOYED THEN YOU HAVE A

GUARANTEED APPROVAL

MARYLANDS LARGEST BUY-HERE-PAY-HERE DEALERSHIP Late Models Low

Mileage

NO Credit Check--OK! • FIRST TIME BUYERS--OK! NO PROOF INCOME--OK! • BK IS--OK! • PAST OR RECENT REPOS--OK! citypaper.com

FEBRUARY

4,

2009

city paper | 81


WWW.CITYPAPER. KAANGO.COM

7 3 6 8 15 Passenger Vans Available!

Cargo Vans & Box Trucks Available!

Rates starting at

$19.00

Rent me TODAY!

Weekly Specials!

INSTANT TAX

HUGE SELECTION OF CARS!

CASH AUTO & TRUCK RENTALS Ç£ Ê ÀÌ Ê* ÌÊ Û`°Ê > Ì Ài]Ê ÊÓ£ÓÎÇÊUÊCorner of North Point & Erdman

REFUND

NO CREDIT CHECK REQUIRED! NO INSURANCE NEEDED! NO CREDIT CARD NEEDED! UNLIMITED MILEAGE!

CREDIT PROBLEMS? FEDERAL BAILOUT DOLLARS HAVE REACHED BALTIMORE!

NOW ACCEPTING: Credit scores as low as 500 Downpayments as low as $500

COME CELEBRATE THE INAUGURATION WITH

UN-PRESIDENT-ED SAVINGS!

WE OFFER:

Late model low mileage Cars, trucks, SUVs and vans

Let us show you how EASY it is to re-establish your credit with over 23 years of Sales & Finance Experience!

Contact Larry Bouldin

443-621-2809 for a FREE evaluation

PIMP NDJG G>9:

Discount

R AT E S without discount

SERVICE. It’s no accident more people trust State Farm to insure their cars. Call today.

Gina Zinn, Agent 1118 Light Street Baltimore, MD 21230 Bus: 410-528-8900 gina.zinn.p4hg@statefarm.com

for helpful hints and free advice

RFARLEY@CITYPAPER.COMÊ 4, 2009

Monthly payments?

bwachter@citypaper.com

CONTACT ROB FARLEY AT FEBRUARY

Credit approval?

Email

PLACE YOUR AD FOR FREE FOR TWO WEEKS

82 | city paper

CONFUSED about finance rates?

Bring in your W-2's and receive your cash TODAY! Why wait? It's so easy to GET YOUR CASH BACK FAST! 410.483.2277

citypaper.com

State Farm Mutual Automobile Insurance Company (Not in NJ), Bloomington, IL P040034 12/04


712

KAWASAKI

'81 KZ650 650 cc tour bike, titled, will pass inspection. $1500 OBO or trade for pickup truck of like value. 443-838-2681 (24 hrs) or email metalsupport@hotmail.com

AUTOMOBILES MISC.

715

ALL CARS, ANY CONDITION: CA$H Top $$$$$ paid for cars & trucks. Any year or condition. We will pick up or tow. Call 443-829-6699

WWW.CITYPAPER.KAANGO.COM

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Auto Sales & Rental ™äĂ“ĂˆĂŠ*Ă•Â?>ĂƒÂŽÂˆĂŠ ˆ}Â…Ăœ>ÞÊUĂŠ >Â?ĂŒÂˆÂ“ÂœĂ€i]ĂŠ ĂŠĂ“ÂŁĂ“Ă“ä

UNLIMITED MILES!

Needed for Kids Fund, Inc. Running or not. Fast, free tow. Tax receipts given. Check our book value for your vehicle. Revenue used locally. Free gift with every donation! Feel good funding city children's education. 410-532-9330. Visit our website at www.kidsfundinc.org/

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DONATE YOUR CAR FREE Same day Pick-up/Tow IRS Tax Deductible Help Kids in Need

AUTOMOBILES SERVICES

1-800-699-7566

ABR INSURANCE

CLASSIFIED LINE DEADLINE:

NO DOWN PAYMENT!

EVERY MONDAY AT NOON. CALL 410-523-3100 TO PLACE YOUR AD TODAY!

720

Points & accidents OK. Low monthly payments. Same day coverage. Call Fred today. 410-551-5101

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and a job you could be approved. Go to:

www.instantcar creditapproval.com

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410-780-4944 CAR & TRUCK SOURCE

CAR,TRUCK,BOAT, & RV DONATIONS

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MOTORCYCLES

FEBRUARY

4,

2009

city paper | 83


FEBRUARY

4, 2009

★★★ CLASSIFIED ONLINE AT W W W.CITYPAPER.K A ANGO.COM ★★★ ★★★ 812 Park Ave., Baltimore, MD 21201 • classified@citypaper.com ★★★

PHONE: LINE-410.523.3100 X212, DISPLAY-410-523-0300 X248 FAX: 410.728.8728

BALTIMORE’S MOST AMAZING RENTALS & SALES

RENT & REAL ESTATE FOR

84 | city paper

citypaper.com

ROOMMATES CATONSVILLE Rm avail, cable incl. W/D, w/w. $395/ mo + utils. 21229. 410-525-3252

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ROOMMATES (COUNTY)

810

ALL AREAS – ROOMMATES.COM Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: www.roommates.com (AAN CAN)

ANNAPOLIS Ten Hills / Catonsville

J;D >?BBI 6E6GIB:CIH Beautiful setting on the City / County line 2 Br's starting @ $780 Fully equipped kitchen, gas heat & cooking, balcony-patio, convenient to 695, schools & shopping. Small pets welcome.

ISO F RM to shr 3 lvl TH. Spacious BR avail now. Priv community, quiet, pkg avail. Near Rts 3, 50, 301, 97. W/D. Utils, cable incl. $575/mo + 1/3 mo deposit. 21403. 215-601-1738

ANNAPOLIS ISO NS prof F to shr clean new 3 BR condo. Great location. Email Wayne for info at wayne.acosta @ronbortnickinc.com

*'&#-**#-.).

SPACIOUS FLOOR PLANS

CATONSVILLE Rte 40 area. Share Ba, kitch, LR. Utils, cable, wi-fi 'net all incl. Near beltway, shopping, busses. $130/mo single or $160/mo couple. Avail now. Zip: 21228. 443-285-9563

DUNDALK Married couple ISO RM(s). Must be employed w/ refs. Gender/sex pref of no concern. Must like pets. NS indoors. Hot tub, pool, AC, W/D. Currently renovating. $175/wk. 21222. 443-980-9300 nzdw@comcast.net "I found City Paper very effective… I received many phone calls and rented my place in 2 days!" – J.O., Apartment Advertiser, Federal Hill

ESSEX ISO F RM for 2nd rm in TH. Must have job, be clean & considerate. No kids or pets. $600/mo; cable, water, 'net incl. Pay ½ of BG&E. Pay 1st mo's rent when moving in. Avail 2/1. Zip: 21221. 443-622-6229

ESSEX ISO M to shr house, use of Ba & kitch. Must have job. No drugs, no pets. Background check req'd. 21221. 410-682-3054

LAUREL

Clipper Mill Living. Ahh, the peace and quiet of city life.

The Assembly Apartments at Clipper Mill are between Hampden & Woodberry, right next to the park. You’re also close to fun shops & restaurants, your favorite hangouts, Light Rail & I-83. Walk inside and you’d never know this place used to make large machinery (“Assembly,” get it?). Picture 2-story lofts with arched windows and lots of natural light. There’s a pool that flows through some stone ruins. And yes, even a stream running through the basement.

Every day you’ll wake up and realize how cool this place is. UÊ UÊ UÊ UÊ UÊ

1 & 2 bedroom lofts Large windows with wooded views Exposed brick Balconies on select units Washer/dryer

UÊ UÊ UÊ UÊ

Leasing by Wallace H. Campbell & Co., Inc.

www.assemblyapartments.com

443-324-8356 DIRECTIONS: From I-83, take the Cold Spring East exit (9A). Make a right onto Falls Rd. Make a right on Union Ave. Make a right on Clipper Rd., and a left on Clipper Park Rd

Community fire pit and hang spot Baltimore’s most unique community pool Verizon FiOs Service Available Green roof

ISO NS quiet prof RM for Mstr BR. Between Balto & DC, right off BW Parkway. 4 mins to MARC train. $700/mo, incl utils. $350 sec dep. 20708. 301-490-9847 or email johnryeh@yahoo.com

MIDDLE RIVER ISO easy-going RM for furn rm. AC, W/D, yd. Owner is smoker, has cats. Must be under 26. $150/wk, incls gas, elect, cable, 'net, H2O. 21220. cuzimdaboss420@aol.com

TOWSON Friendly, clean prof NS ISO same to shr 3 BR, 3 Ba hm in quiet area. AC, W/D, storage, fin bsmt, pool, prking. Must be responsible. Avail now. $500/mo + utils. Zip: 21286. 410-296-0296

ROOMMATES (CITY)

815

BAYVIEW AREA ISO young prof for priv rm & full Ba in downtown TH. W/D. Newly renovated in great, safe area. Avail 2/1. $550/mo, utils incl. 21224. 410-698-5249

BEL AIR-EDISON 33 y.o. prof/grad student ISO RM for lrg renovated TH. W/D, 'net, d/w, cable, hdwd, sec sys. $450500/mo + 1/3 utils. 21213. lastubbs@verizon.net

CANTON Lrg furnished BR avail in nice & safe area. Utils, cable, W/D all incl. $400/mo. 21224. 443-938-6466


ROOMMATES FOR RENT ROOMMATES (CITY)

815

CANTON Prof F ISO RM to shr 2 BR, 1 Ba. Pets welcome, must get along w/ 20 lb dog & cat. Behind Can Co, near Sq. Pkg not a problem. Safe area. $750/mo + ½ utils (approx $150) & $750 sec dep. 21224. 410-530-0541

CHARLES VILL. ISO drug-free NS F prof or grad student for furnished rm. Shr Ba, kitch, laundry facilities. Utils incl. AC avail. On bus line. $500/mo. Credit chk & refs req'd. 21218. 410-366-2243

CHARLES VILL. Sunny corner RH, avail now-6/1. 2 F students ISO clean, responsible 3rd RM. 2 indoor cats. Big kitch, bsmt storage, fenced yd. $475/mo + utils ($60-$120). 21218. 317-440-7861 anytime or laurenelinks@gmail.com FEDERAL HILL – 21230

LOOKING FOR‌ Students/responsible ind, CAC, plenty of eateries, ctyd $135/wk & key charge. Nr MTA 410-814-4508 thehouseinfederalhill@gmail.com

FEDERAL HILL BR avail in luxury TH. Shr w/ 2 late20s profs who are fun, respectful, generally very quiet. Heat, AC, W/D, ss appls, d/w, cable, 'net, more. $750/mo + 1/3 utils. 21230. 301-4040764 jeremytunis@gmail.com

FEDERAL HILL ISO RM to shr 2 BR, 1.5 Ba RH. 1 yr lse req'd. I have a medium sz dog. CAC, sec sys, W/D, fncd bkyd. Near pub trans. Credit chk, employ & rent history req'd. $600/mo + ½ utils. 21230. lbatty@ymail.com

MT VERNON-21201 NEAR COPPIN Furn rm w/ cable, A/C, utils incl. Nr pub trans/schls/parks. St prkng, safe. $400/m Females only 410-462-5367. After 9 am. 21216.

NEAR MORGAN ISO lesbian or bi F to shr 3 BR hm. You'll have use of common areas, laundry rm, off-st pkg. $675/mo, all utils incl. 21206 443-677-5549

PATTERSON PARK Lrg Mstr BR avail in newly rehabbed house. Hdwd flrs, large eat-in kitch, d/w, fin bsmt, W/D, covered deck, CAC. 1 blk from Patterson Park. Call John 410-615-5951 anytime. 21224

ROLAND PARK ISO cat-friendly NS. Near Rotunda & JHU Homewood. W/D, d/w, cable, 'net, hdwd flrs. $525/mo + 1 mo sec dep. 21210. 443-473-5300 ilibowitz@yahoo.com

HAMPDEN ISO F RM to shr lovely 3 BR hm just off the Avenue. 1 Ba, W/D, d/w, exp brick, hdwd, deck, skylt. Near JHU Homewood, bus. $550/mo. 21211. Call Jessie 812-320-1928 or email jessiewatrous@hotmail.com

MAYFIELD ISO gay-friendly NS. Near JHU, Morgan, pub trans. AC, W/D, d/w, hdwd, yd, 'net. Utils incl. Furniture avail if wanted. $400/mo. 21218. 410-889-3282 energyhands@earthlink.net

MOUNT VERNON Rm avail w/ cable & BG&E incl. Work history needed. $165/wk + small sec dep. 21201. 443-413-1778

MT VERNON-21201 ISO non smk male room for rent $165wk +sec dep, cable, w/d, yard Call Amanda 443-682-9804 CLASSIFIEDS UPDATED DAILY AT WWW.CITYPAPER.COM

Call Emily at 443-452-1521 to place your ad today! CHARLES VILLAGE - 21218

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.(+#.// ROOM RENTALS

STUDENT PLACE 825

BALTIMORE CITY / COUNTY

Near JHU, 2900 Calvert St, Avail 3/1/09, month to month, total turn key operation. 1 Br, phone, dsl, satellite, dvr, utils all inc, fully furnished. $500/mo. Email rplabor@verizon.net

WWW.CITYPAPER.KAANGO.COM

Westridge Apartments

Extremely convenient location Fully carpeted Available with washer dryer Huge kitchens 1000 square feet Fireplace available in select units

ROOMS FOR RENT Share with responsible homeowners. $450/mo avg. Non-profit St. Ambrose 410-366-6180 BALTIMORE CITY

ROOM RENTAL W/D. $65 – 160/wk (incl Utils) + SD. 443-925-1299

FREE RENT

MAKE YOUR AD STAND OUT! Add your company's logo to your Classified Line ad! Call Nicole at 443-452-1522 for details

IMMEDIATE OCCUPANCY

*restrictions apply

From

$1134/month

284 Bloomsbury Avenue Baltimore, MD 21228

Call 410-744-7838

BALTIMORE CITY

ROOMS FOR RENT

S. BALTIMORE ISO senior citizen RM or mature, responsible person. $95/wk. 21225. Call between noon & 5 pm 410-350-0284

W. COLD SPRING West Cold Spring & Reisterstown area. Furn rm avail, would prefer F RM. Must be NS w/ job. No drugs, no kids, no couples, no pets. $125/wk + $250 sec dep. 21215. edwinpitt8@aol.com

Newly renov'd, drug-free only. Mgrs needed. $90-125/wk. 443-248-6661

CANTON - 21224 33 YO Professional looking for roommate for large, fully renvt'd TH. Exp Brick, Din rm, W/D, CAC. $550 + 1/3 Expenses for the sunniest BR in the house. 410-262-4683

City Paper Works! We received several calls within the first month of adver tising in the City Paper and rented 6 apar tments from that ad...what a great investment! -O.B., Property Manager, Holly Lane Apartments

HAMILTON ISO F RM to shr 3 BR, 1.5 Ba home w/ prof F & dog. Fncd yd, dogs welcome. Off-st pkg, bsmt storage. $600/mo + utils; 1 mo. sec dep req'd. 21206. 443-280-4315

CITY PAPER = RESULTS!

Need Rmmte for spacious apt. W/ Heat, A/C, H20, W/D. 443-799-8321

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MT. WASHINGTON/PIKESVILLE

Suburban Setting with City Convenience Huge 1 & 2 BR Apartments From

$

s &ULLY EQUIPPED SUNNY EAT IN KITCHENS s (UGE ROOMS WITH EXTRA CLOSET SPACE s !LL NEW ENERGY EFl CIENT APPLIANCES s HOUR EMERGENCY MAINTENANCE s 0RIVATE SWIMMING POOL s "EAUTIFULLY MANICURED GROUNDS COMMON AREAS s &REE AMPLE PARKING s 3MALL PETS ALLOWED

410.764.3899 citypaper.com

FEBRUARY

4,

2009

city paper | 85


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FOR RENT IRVINGTON - 21229 CLIFTON PARK - 21214 PARK HEIGHTS - 21225

FINE ROOMS Friendly, co-ed, drug/smoke free. $400-$480. Kitch, cable, laundry. Furn/Unfurn. COUPLES $540-$600 Easy move in! 443-806-9324

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FEDERAL HILL – 21230/21231

ROOMS FOR RENT Baltimore's historic Federal Hill & Fells Point areas. Utils inc. Dep req. Single occ only. $400-475/mo 1-888-506-2624 FULTON & BARCLAY - 21223

ROOMS 4 RENT

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FURNISHED Furnished rms. $400/mo. 1 mo SD req'd. Singles only. 410-383-6424 WEST BALTIMORE - 21216

ROOMS 4 RENT Fully furnished, everything inc!!! Job req. $125/pw 202-905-7868

$100-125/week Utilities included + $250 Security Deposit. Call Jeremiah 202-459-3855

MOSHER STREET

Loch Raven

Wellesley House Apartments Mid-Rise Building Personal entry system Convenient location $0 security deposit* Studio $675

410-444-7611 www.aptrent.com Open Daily 9-5, Sun 12-5 *to qualified applicants. Equal Housing Opportunity

LUXURY ROOMS CAC, w/w carpet, drug free, drama free. $100-150 per week, utils & cable incld. 410-814-7293 WEST BALTIMORE

LUXURY ROOM With private bathroom. CAC, w/w carpet, drug free, drama free. $200 per week, utils & cable incld. $440 moves you in! 410-814-7293

GARAGE/PARKING RENTAL 835

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RANCHER 4 Br, 2 ½ Ba, LV, Fam Rm w/fireplace, Lg Kitch, W/D, Central Air, Elect heat, 2 car garage, $2500 APARTMENT 3 Br, Sitting Rm off each Br 3 Ba, Kitch, DR, All newly renov, hd wd flrs, new ba. W/D on premises $1800 all utils inc. 443-465-2906

APT. RENTAL (CITY)

855

BALTIMORE CITY – 21223

1 BR & DEN, 1 BA ASK ABOUT MOVE-IN SPECIALS Sec 8 OK. No Pets. $575/mo + Utils & SD. 443-320-0446

REACH PROSPECTS PLANNING TO BUY! 22% of City Paper readers plan to buy a home in the next year. Call Gemma at 443-452-1523 to place your ad today!

1, 2 & 3 BR APARTMENTS & HOUSES Available all over the City. Section 8 Approved. Starting at $600 + Utils + SD. 410-342-6287

BALTIMORE CITY

BAD CREDIT? DON'T WORRY! Beautiful 1-5 Brs avai in City and the county 757-638-9777 BELAIR-EDISON - 21213

2 LEVEL 2 BR BALTIMORE CITY - 21202

1712 Barclay 1 BR - 3rd Fl Apt. $540/mo + Utils. Avail NOW! Call Steve - 301-717-2494

BALTIMORE CITY - 21202

ROLAND PARK - 21210

WHAT A DEAL!!! 1 Car Garage. Roll-up door. Electric. Residential area. Private use only. $125/mo 443-465-2906

APT. RENTAL (COUNTY)

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BALTIMORE CITY

Ground floor, newly renovated. Powder room on main flr, 2 Br + upgraded full Ba. No pets/smoking. Refs req. $895/mo. 410-977-0200

BELVEDERE SQUARE – 21212

BEAUTIFUL

TOWSON/RODGERS FORGE 21212

citypaper.com

PRIVATE ESTATE

2 Br ,1 Ba, apt, CAC $850 - $875 Call 410-977-2065 / 443-392-7351

4 Car Garage. Roll-up door. Electric. Residential area. Private use only. $525/mo 443-465-2906

4, 2009

NW SINAI HOSP 2861 Edgecombe Circle N. 2 Br, 1 Ba, CAC, hdwd flrs. From $600/mo. 410-415-5553

GREEN SPRING VALLEY/ OWINGS MILLS - 21117

Garage/Parking/Storage. Call now! 410-963-0245

WHAT A DEAL!!!

FEBRUARY

BALTIMORE CITY - 21215

HUD HOMES!

RECENT REHAB

CHARLES VILLAGE - 21218

$100 PER MONTH

86 | city paper

ALL AREAS

WEST BALTIMORE

• • • •

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NORTHWEST BALTIMORE 21215

www.citypaper.com UPDATED DAILY

HOUSE/THS RENTAL (COUNTY) 852

FROM $199/MO 4 Br, 2 Ba. Only $238/mo. More 1-4 Br's avail! For listings, call 1-800-585-3617 ext. T085

WEST BALTIMORE CITY- 21217

The Perfect Studio for you!

2 Ba, lg Kitch Lr. Off st parking. Nice yd. Everything inc. W/D on premises. $450/mo 410-529-3721

Shared kitch & Ba. $385/mo +$160/SD. Call 301-379-2378

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ROOMS 4 RENT

850

TOWSON AREA - 21214

RUXTON ROAD 1 Br, 1 Ba, in-law apt, on 2 acre lot. Private entrance on 2nd flr. A/C, w/w carpet. Small deck overlooking quiet woods & well-kept yard. $575/mo. Call 410-823-5730 Ask for Mrs. Fisher

RING IN THE NEW YEAR @ BOUNDARY SQUARE APTS 317 E. North Ave. Baltimore 21202 M-F 8:30 am–5 pm Sat 10 am–2 pm 410-284-0900/410-284-0078(FAX) We now have 1 & 2 BR units avail Starting at $550/mo. ALL Qualified Applicants will receive 1st Month FREE or $50 OFF EVERY MONTH for the 1st year. ALL UNITS INCLUDE: Key Card Entrance Security in the building Gated Rear Parking W/W Carpet, D/W, Garbage Disposal, CAC, Electric Heat W/D on premises CALL TODAY – UNITS ARE GOING FAST

BOLTON HILL - 21217

PARK AVE $1100 1 Br condo w/raised area, den, LR, Ba, Kitch, W/D. Modern convs & hist setting. Secure w/patio, w/private gate. 301-401-7568 JSWArchitect@aol.com BOLTON HILL – 21217

REAL DEAL 1702 Bolton. Classy 1 BR + Den on big whole flr, DR + eat in K, mod bath, deck, W/D on prem, $1050 INCL HEAT + HW 410-323-1300

BOLTON HILL

FABULOUS Victorian-style apt. Entire 2nd flr (950 sq ft). Wonderful amenities. Available now. $1075/mo. Call 410-440-6976


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FOR RENT APT. RENTAL (CITY)

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855 CHARLES VILLAGE

BUTCHERS HILL - 21231

CLOSE TO JHU

CHARLES VILLAGE - 21218

PRIVATE DECK $800/month. 2nd Fl,1 Br apt, 1 Ba, W/D, AC, Alarm & garage. Quiet street. Convenient to JHMU. Cat OK 410-336-9332 helnauxproperties@att.net

Sunny 2 Br apt in quiet building. 4 blocks to JHU. Hdwd flrs, French doors, balcony. $999/mo, inclds heat. 410-889-1339

THE BALTIMOREAN APARTMENTS Furnished Studios starting at $785 Short and Long term leases. www.baltimoreanapartments.com For More Information Call 410-889-4157

CHARLES VILLAGE – 21218

AVAILABLE NOW! 115 W. 29th HUGE, Bright 1 BR, 1 BA. Hdwd Flrs, High ceilings, W/D, Large secure storage area. Walk –out to private Deck &Yard. 2 Blocks to JHU. Non-smoking. $850/mo (Heat incl) + SD. 301-801-1674 or jamie@langlie.com

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Available at over 1,800 locations throughout Baltimore & the 5 surrounding counties. Call 410-523-3100 to place your ad today!

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HOUSE/THS RENTAL (CITY) 865

HUD HOMES! FROM $199/MO 4 Br, 2 Ba. Only $238/mo. More 1-4 Br's avail! For listings, call 1-800-585-3617 ext. B046

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BALTIMORE CITY

N

ew, new, new! Be one of the ďŹ rst to live in these fully renovated apartments! Enjoy your brand new kitchen appliances while being surrounded with either new wall-to-wall carpeting or beautifully reďŹ nished hardwood oors. Our park setting is the perfect place to call home, close to everything, but tucked away from the busy roads. Stop in today to see our whole new look!

$

100 OFF

EACH MONTH'S RENT WHEN YOU MENTION THIS AD

FEBRUARY RENT FREE! FEATURES t /FX LJUDIFO BQQMJBODFT BOE garbage disposal t $IPPTF GSPN DBSQFUJOH PS reďŹ nished hardwood oors t -BVOESZ DFOUFST JO FBDI CVJMEJOH t $MPTF UP B HSFBU TIPQQJOH DFOUFS t 8BML UP QVCMJD USBOTQPSUBUJPO t /FX QMBZHSPVOE BOE CBTLFUCBMM courts nearby t 8BML UP TDIPPMT BOE DIVSDIFT t .JOJ CMJOET QSPWJEFE t IPVS NBJOUFOBODF

ALL VOUCHERS

ACCEPTED!

FLOORPLANS Two and three bedroom apartments starting as low as

$

700*

*with specials, inquire for details

DIRECTIONS: From the Baltimore Beltway, take Exit 3PVUF &BTU #BMUJNPSF /BUJPOBM 1JLF 5VSO left at Swann Ave. Make a right at Rokeby Rd. and turn left at Walnut Ave. Make a right at Seminole Ave. The property will be on your left.

OFFICE HOURS: Mon-Fri 9-4 SEMINOLE COURT 4FNJOPMF "WFOVF 4VJUF #BMUJNPSF .% citypaper.com

FEBRUARY

4,

2009

SEMINOLE COURT

2231 St. Paul opp Old Goucher/ Lovely Lane Church. 1900sf whole-floor, big rooms, 12' ceilings, HW, expose brick, 2 FP, mod Kitch & Bath, 120 yrs refurb CHARACTER , $1200 + Utils. 410-323-1300

$

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CHARLES VILLAGE – 21218

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city paper | 87


MT. WASHINGTON

ASK ABOUT OUR PREMIER APARTMENTS*

FOR RENT DOWNTOWN/UMAB/BIOTECH 21201 CHARLES VILLAGE/ NEAR JHU - 21218

CHARLES VILL. APARTMENT s 'ATED ACCESS TO THE COMMUNITY s "EAUTIFUL LANDSCAPED GROUNDS s #ONTEMPORARY KITCHENS WITH WASHER DRYER MICROWAVE s 7ARM GAS HEAT AIR CONDITIONING s #ABLE 46 HIGH SPEED )NTERNET AVAILABLE

s "ALCONY OR PATIO s 7ALL TO WALL CARPETING MINI BLINDS s 3WIMMING POOL TENNIS s &ITNESS CENTER s %NERGY EFlCIENT WINDOWS s #OMMUNITY HALL s ,AUNDRY CENTER s 0ET FRIENDLY

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Minutes from Pikesville, Whole Foods, Kelly Ave Shopping, The Atrium, JFX, Beltway, Light Rail & Downtown Come See our Model! Open M-F 9-5/ Weekends 11-4 {£äÂ‡Ă‡Ăˆ{‡äxäĂŽĂŠUĂŠwww.fallsvillageapts.com

Very Large 2 BR, 1st Flr. Hdwd, Dining Rm, W/D. $975/mo incl. Heat & Water. 410-321-0335

CHARLES VILLAGE

NEAR UNION MEMORIAL Large 1 Br with balcony. $925/mo, inclds heat. 410-889-1339

CITY PAPER = RESULTS! Call Nicole at 443-452-1522 to place your ad today! CHARLES VILLAGE SOUTH 21218

W/D IN UNIT!

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88 | city paper

FEBRUARY

4, 2009

citypaper.com

1 Weekend in Ocean City FREE. The best view in Baltimore! 2 Br, w/ deck, CAC, W/D, bsmt for storage. 1838 East Pratt, between Wolfe & Ann. $1195/mo + utils Call Robert 443-277-6510

EDMONDSON VILLAGE – 21216

Newly renov,1 Br, 1 Ba w/new kitch & cpt. $600. 410-496-0393

RENOVATED FEDERAL HILL – 21230

FEDERAL HILL - 21230

LARGE 1 BR W/W carpet, near bus stop. $710/mo. 800-518-9806

FELLS POINT - 21231

â˜ş!READY NOW!â˜ş 1 Br. $625 per month! 1 Month Deposit. Includes heat and water! Ceiling Fans, w/w carpet. No Pets! Bus Line 64! Call 410-440-7710

Lg 1 Br + Den, W/D, hdwd flrs. $850/mo + sec dep. 410-276-1034

5 BR, 1 ½ BA Hanover & West St. $1000/mo. No Sec 8 or Pets. 917-216-3059

CHARLES VILLAGE

CURTIS BAY - 21226

FELLS POINT

SPACIOUS 2 BR 1207 S. Hanover St. CAC, Dishwasher, W/D, W/W Carpet. $995/mo + Utils + SD. 410-685-6464

700 S. BOND ST. 1 BR W/DEN LARGE 1 BR w/ DEN. 2 lvls Hardwood floors, W/D, Dishwasher, CAC, $1195/mo. Available NOW! Call 410-977-5540 FELLS POINT - 21231

ALICEANNA ST Recently updated 2 level 2 Br, 1 Ba, hdwd flrs, W/D, d/w, eat-in-kit, deck. $1250/mo + utils. 301-257-7329

FELLS POINT, UPPER - 21231

1/2 BR APTS Near Hopkins. $720 - $820 Ht Included. 410-560-9002 FOREST PARK - 21216

1 & 2 BR APTS Available for immediate occupancy. Starting at $625/mo. Please call 410-466-2900

FORREST PARK/GWYNN OAKS 20705

FORREST PARK APARTMENTS Large Newly Rnvtd 1, 2 & 3 Br. Hardwood floors and Wall to Wall Carpet, Central Heat & AC, Laundry, Prkng. Starting at $675 Wilrose Realty Call 410-466-6060 HAMILTON - 21214

5507 CARTER AVE 1 Br, upgrades, laundry rm, storage fp, porch & bkyd. $640/mo + utils. SD + cred ck req. Call J Henry 410-206-8550

CITY PAPER RENTALS = RESULTS!

Jme X[Zheec WlW_bWXb[ \hec

Ed[ X[Zheec WlW_bWXb[ \hec

With w/w carpet, CAC, dishwasher, ceiling fan, breakfast bar, etc. $695/mo. Call 410-653-8192

FEDERAL HILL - 21230

Maryland Ave. $650 - $998/mo, some include utilities. Available now. Call 410-837-2430

>8I;<EJ

VALENTINES SPECIAL

1 Br 700 sq ft, 1st flr, new cpt, exp brick, ctyd. Deal @ $695 + util Also, 2nd flr 1 Br 700 sq ft, avail mid Feb $640 + util. 410-255-2826

STUDIO, 1 & 2 BR

IFJ<DFEK

ATTRACTIVE 1 BEDROOM

QUIET BLOCK

Professionally Managed by

87BJ?CEH; 9?JO

FELLS POINT - 21231

"City Paper did such a fine job, I had to cancel the order in 24 hours. Rented" – Lawrence Lehner

HAMILTON - 21214

HUGE 2 BR APT $850/mo + utils. 1200 sq ft, 1st flr, lg hse. 3 huge rms, kit, ba. Walk to Harford Rd, shop'g, buses, rests. Cat OK. Avail Feb 1st. 410-319-6107 jshelly@xohm.com

HAMILTON/LAURAVILLE – 21214

RENOVATED 1 BR New Carpet & Paint. CAC, W/D. Updated Kitch & Bath. $850/mo + Utils & SD. 443-604-4758


FOR RENT MOUNT VERNON - 21201

APT. RENTAL (CITY)

855

$595 - $1275/MO!!!

1600 ST PAUL ST.

Studio, 1 Br, & 2 Br Available. Call 410-547-0414 www.mvpapartments.com

Great for commuters! 2 Br, 1 Ba. Opp Penn St, steps to JH shuttle. Great for Commuter prof, Uni students/employees. W/W cpt, Excellent location $1050/mo avail immediately. 443-695-4243

HAMPDEN/WYMAN PARK - 21211

1 & 2 BEDROOM APARTMENTS Wyman Court & Hickory Heights Apartments 2 Br, Upper Levels with Balcony. From $725 - $825/mo plus utilities; 1 Br, Wood Floors. $685/mo plus utilities. Call 410-764-7776 BrooksManagementCompany.com

IRVINGTON - 21229

307 COLLINS AVE 4 BR,2 BA w/ in-law suite -$1395 3 BR, 1 BA - $950 Hdwd Flrs, On-site W/D. SD req'd. M-F 12-5. 410-781-6069

LITTLE ITALY - 21202

VERY, LARGE 1 BR LUXURY APT

HAVE IT ALL AT MARBLE HALL!! Spacious Newly Renovated 1 & 2 Br Available. Convenient to Shopping, Public Transportation, Major Highways and Schools. Starting at $630 with Security Deposits as little as $99 Ask for details! Come By and See Why Marble Hall Gardens should be YOUR Next Home! Please Call 410-323-6124

MOUNT VERNON - 21201

1 & 2 BEDROOM Fabulous industrial & firehouse setting, loft-style apts. Original details, enormous windows, stained concrete flrs, multiple baths, decks, A/C, W/D, secure bldg, off st pkg. $700-$1600/mo. 410-685-8887 MOUNT VERNON - 21201

1ST MONTH'S RENT FREE Secure Building. 1 Br and Studio Apartments Available. Large. Laundromat on the 1st Floor. Desk Attendant 24 Hours per Day. Call 410-727-8360

MOUNT VERNON – 21202

MOUNT VERNON - 21201

MONUMENT PLACE APTS 1 Br Loft or flat w/ fireplace 630-805 sq ft $739 -$799. 2 Br, 2 Ba 816 - 913 sq ft $999 - $1059/mo. Central heat & air. Full appliances inc w/d, Tele entry system, w/w carpets, all elect units. Off street parking also avail. 410-625-0604 "I got a fast rental with the demographic we wanted: professional, responsible tenants," Maurice Bates

1 Ba, CAC, w/w carpet, W/D, exposed brick, intercom door buzzer. $800/mo + utils + sec dep Call 410-752-7794

UTILITIES PAID BY OWNER

HIST MT VERNON 4 Br, 3Ba Hse $2200 2Br, 1 Ba, apt $1100 1 Br /den, renov $1050 Studio, renov $775 All with w/d, CAC, D/W & new appliances. 410-303-2928

2 BEDROOM APT

St. Paul & Preston. Large 2 Br or used as 1 Br with home office suite; 1 Ba; Hardwood floors; Lg closet space; excellent for students. Utilities paid by owner except cable & phone. Very close to Amtrak, Symphony, UB, Peabody & restaurants. $800/mo or $950/mo with parking space. Call 617-901-6889 or email William-doyle@hotmail.com

Membership includes the right occupyto several unique "s Membership includes theto right occupy one of apartments in historic Washington Hill. several unique apartments in historic Washington s To become your own landlord call for a membership package. Hill.

Essex

KINGS MILL APARTMENTS

$10 APPLICATION FEE!

410-276-1008

• $0 security deposit* • Great location • Creative Kids Center on site 1BR $580 • 2BR $690

410-686-3333

Available at over 1,800 locations throughout Baltimore & the 5 surrounding counties. Call 410-523-3100 to place your ad today!

@KP &@M@E> K #KJ <JK 1 BR’s starting @ $650 • W/W Carpet • Central Air • Garbage Disposal • Electric Range • Frost Free Refrigerator

LANDMARK APARTMENTS 628 N. Eutaw Street • Baltimore, MD 21201

(410) 383-9925

Income & Other Restrictions Apply*

Blue Star Realty Property Management HOMES & APARTMENTS

FOR RENT

1 to 5 Bedroom Properties SECTION 8 WELCOME

410-276-

STAR (7827)

P

www.aptrent.com *Certain restrictions apply. Equal Housing Opportunity

" o become your own landlord call for a membership Our friendly staff is waiting to introduce you to the beneďŹ ts information package. and obligations of membership in a housing cooperative

410-276-1008

s Close to Inner Harbor s EfďŹ ciency to 4 bedroom s Minutes to I-895, i-695, units I-95 & I-83 s 24-hour emergency Ourmaintenance friendly staff is waiting tos introduce to the Walk to metroyou subway & bus benefits and obligations of membership in a housing service s Public Transportation

cooperative

WWW.CITYPAPER.KAANGO.COM

1 Bedroom $752 2 Bedroom $850-904 t Wall to wall carpet in the bedrooms t Application fees waived for Hospital Workers and Government employees for January only.

2601 MADISON AVE., BALTIMORE, MD 21217

LOCHRAVEN/ COLDSPRING 21218

MOUNT VERNON - 21201

Now accepting applications for membership Washington Hill Co-op Apartments, an upscale urban community, has memberships for sale.

MOUNT VERNON

RENAISSANCE PLAZA

W/D, CAC & heat. High Speed Internet (incl. in rent). $1150/mo + SD. Call 443-413-5272

MOUNT VERNON – 21202

BRING IN THIS AD FOR APPLICATION FEE DISCOUNT

410-728-1114

IT ALL STARTS WITH THE VIEW

N E W P E N T H O U S E A PA R TM E N T N OW AVA I L A B L E ! ! !

citypaper.com

FEBRUARY

4,

2009

city paper | 89


&

:EMDJEMD M7J;H<HEDJ

THINK BIG… BIG VIEWS

BIG LUXURY

HISTORIC LOFTS

are the new urban chic.

BIG APARTMENTS

No monthly pet rent!

CITY PAPER READERS:

Mention this ad & recieve $1000 off on 1st visit!

Pet Friendly*

*Breed restrictions do apply

THE CRESCENT

Start from a historic loft-style apartment home as unmistakable as you are. -«>V ÕÃÊ ÌV i ÃÊUÊ-ÌÕ }ÊÛ iÜÃÊ vÊ` Ü Ì Ü Ê > Ì ÀiÊUÊ1 µÕiÊy ÀÊ« > ÃÊ UÊ VViÃÃÊÌ Ê > ÀÊ > Ì ÀiÊ>ÌÌÀ>VÌ ÃÊUÊ,iÌ> Ê> `ÊÀiÃÌ>ÕÀ> ÌÃÊ Ã ÌiÊ UÊ-Ì>Ìi v Ì i >ÀÌÊwÌ iÃÃÊVi ÌiÀÊUÊ Õà iÃÃÊVi ÌiÀÊUÊ,ià `i ÌÊ Õ }i

AT FELLS POINT

Ultimate Urban Waterfront Address 951 Fell Street • Baltimore, Maryland 21231 |

P 410.534.VIEW

*Pricing & specials subject to change

90 | city paper

CrescentFellsPoint.com

BRINGING CITY LIFE TO YOUR FRONT D OOR Stylish Apartment Homes On The New West Side

CAMDEN COURTS 410-244-7240 CAMDENCOURTAPTS.COM Mon.-Fri. 8am-5pm, Sat. 9am-5pm Sun. closed

FEBRUARY

4, 2009

citypaper.com

Studios, 1 and 2-Bedroom Rentals from $905 a Month* nÊ °Ê Ü>À`Ê-Ì°ÊUÊ > Ì Ài]Ê ÊÓ£Óä£ ÜÜÜ° Û> i ÌiÀ« Ì°V ÊUÊnÈÈ°x {°Î£äÇ

*Call for details


&

:EMDJEMD M7J;H<HEDJ 101 WELLS

THE GREENEHOUSE WHERE LUXURY AND CONVENIENCE MEET

LIVE WELL HISTORIC CHARM MODERN AMENITIES.

The Greenehouse features unique residences with historic character such as exposed brick walls, refinished hardwood floors, granite counters,

Federal Hill’s newest luxury apartment community

stainless steel appliances, large windows, and

with spacious floor plans featuring, refinished

dramatically high ceilings.

hardwood floors, oversized windows, and new

One bedrooms starting at $1,200 and Two bedrooms

interior construcion.

starting at $1,600. For a limited time, reserve an

One bedrooms starting at $1,155 and Two bedrooms

apartment and receive 2 months FREE.

starting at $1,450. Reserve TODAY and receive ONE MONTH FREE!

519 W. PR AT T ST REE T, BA LT IMORE, MD 21201 4 4 3-9 2 7- 6 6 8 3 PMC Pr oper t y Gr oup

10 3 E A S T W E L L S S T – B A LT IMOR E, MD 2 12 3 0 4 4 3 - 9 2 7- 6 6 8 3 P M C P r oper t y Gr oup

w w w.GR E E NE HOUS E B A LT IMOR E.com

N O W

LUXU RY I S N ’ T

L E A S I N G

T H I S G R A N D

F O R

E V E R Y O N E

A complimentary chauffeur-driven limousine. A dramatic skylounge. 24-hour concierge services to make your busy life easier. Are you ready for a life of unparalleled convenience and cosmopolitan services? At 39 West Lexington, your expectations will be exceeded. You’ll know you’ve arrived—from the moment you enter the grand lobby. Visit us today to be among the select few who will be able to call this Baltimore landmark home.

LUXURY RENTAL APARTMENTS | STUDIO | 1-BEDROOM | 2-BEDROOM | PENTHOUSE | 2-LEVEL PENTHOUSE

39 WEST LEXINGTON STREET, BALTIMORE, MD 21201 FOR MORE INFORMATION, OR TO SCHEDULE AN APPOINTMENT, CALL 888.512.2864. 39WESTLEX.COM

citypaper.com

FEBRUARY

4,

2009

city paper | 91


IFC8E; G8IB :?8IC<J M@CC8><

FOR RENT

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MOUNT WASHINGTON / CHESWOLDE - 21209 MOUNT VERNON

RENT INCLU DES

706 PARK AVENUE

HEAT

1st floor. Spacious 2 Br, 2 Ba. Hdwd flrs, lots of closets, private yard. $1200/mo + utils. Available March 1st. 410-547-8396

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MOUNT WASHINGTON – 21209

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MOUNT WASHINGTON PARK APTS

Find your Dream Apartment

Very spacious 2 Br, 1 ½ Ba. Refinished wood floors. Mid-level, secured building. Central air, dishwasher. $850/mo + utilities. 410-764-7776 BrooksManagementCompany.com

MT VERNON-21202

RENOVATED 1 & 2 BEDROOM APARTMENTS FREE RENT UNTIL MARCH 1ST! 2 Br with updated kitchen and bathroom, Hardwood floors & Balcony. $875/mo + utilities. Available now; 1 Br. $775/mo + utilities. Call 410-764-7776 brooksmanagementcompany.com

MT VERNON-21201 1 Br's From $695 & 2 Br's From $795/mo Heat & Hot water included! W/D in bldg. No section 8. 410-322-0562 Patrick.tyler@hotmail.com

...right here.

RENOVATED MANSION Quaint 2 level 2 Br, 2 Ba. Wood floors, Central Air, dishwasher, lots of natural light. $950/mo + utilities. Call 410-764-7776 brooksmanagementcompany.com

3203 MARY AVE 1BR/1BA 2nd FL apt, hdwd flrs, gas stove,W/D,yd,conv pkg, bus,hosp, coll $850/mo+utils. 301-808-2064 babbots@verizon.net NEW ARTS DISTRICT – 21218

NEW REHAB 1 Br. Sec system, off st pking, on bus line. Avail now! $850/mo. No smoking. 240-475-4466

1, 2 & 4 BR

2 BR APTS 907 St Paul -$1300/mo(incl utils) 922 St Paul- $850/mo + Utils Renov't Kitchen, Updated Bath, Fire Place, Hdwd Floors, W/D. Call 410-547-6623

3801 Oakford & 5032 Denmore. CAC, lead free. 1 blk from Callaway School. $675/mo. 410-800-5005 iemh43@hotmail.com

MT VERNON-21201 700 Park Ave – 1 blk from Wash Monument. Historic mid-rise. 2 Br, 1 Ba. $895/mo Carriage House. $695/mo Secure apt bldng w/ laundry. No pets. Call 410-383-8815

1 Br, newly decorated, gas heat, $540/mo + G&E. 410-367-8566

Eager & Charles. Quiet 3rd Fl apt. Hdwd flrs. $525/mo (incl Heat & water). Call 410-404-5684

Galleries all around. Columns and arches to thrill your eye and ceiling fans to create indoor summer breezes.

2 BR, 1 BA W/ Liv & din Rm & kitch. Hdwd flrs, Near subway. $850. 410-383-6424

2APTS AVAILABLE 4th floor walk-up Studio apt with Ba, Kitchen, AC, hot air heat w/w carpeting, permit pkg, & W/D on premises $900/mo. 443-465-2906 Ground level Apt Studio Ba, Kitch area LR/Br combines, Full cpt permit pkg, W/D on premises. $850/mo. 443-465-2906 UPPER PARK HEIGHTS / PIKESVILLE - 21208

1 & 2 BEDROOM APARTMENTS Clarks Lane Apartments FIRST MONTH FREE SPECIAL! Spacious 2 Br, 2 Ba with large balcony. $1025/mo + utilities. 1 Br, elevator building. $875/mo. Inclds all utils except electric 2 Br, 2 Ba. $1300/mo. Call 410-764-7776 BrooksManagementCompany.com

OPEN HOUSE SPECIAL! RESERVOIR HILL - 21217

AVAILABLE NOW!

LARGE 1 BR W/W, near bus stop. Vouchers OK. $585/mo. 800-518-9806

Âą1R@@OÂą"@<GÂąAJMÂąTJPÂą<I?ÂąTJPMÂąI@RÂąCJH@

This place is NOT to be MISSED!

1 & 2 Br LOFT Apartments

$600 Off 1 year lease! U 36 Manhattan style loft apartments –8 different oor plans U Hardwood Floors U 14' to 16' Ceilings U 9' to 12' Windows U Decorative columns and arches in every unit

U Washer and Dryer in unit U Ceiling Fans U Pets allowed U Private Lobby and Gallery space U State-of-the-art Security U Concierge Available

300 North Charles Street, Baltimore, MD 21201

410-675-5500 Ask for Dian Combs 4, 2009

ROLAND PARK/ JHU - 21210

RESERVOIR HILL

EFFICIENCY

Theater, Shopping, Businesses and

FEBRUARY

2 Br, 1 Ba. LR with Fireplace, DR, Kitchen, Sun porch, W/D on premises, Hot air heat & CAC. Street Parking. $1400/mo. 443-465-2906

1Br/1Ba & 2Br/2Ba, CAC. Good refs req. Sharon 410-592-5278 OTHER LOCATIONS AVAILABLE!

MT. VERNON – 21202

A Downtown location with Restaurants,

92 | city paper

TUDOR STYLE APT

7211 Park Heights Avenue NORTHWEST BALTIMORE – 21217

MT VERNON – 21202

30 E. PRESTON ST

ROLAND PARK - 21210

NE BALTIMORE CITY – 21214

NORTHWEST BALT - 21215

MT. VERNON – 21201 MOUNT WASHINGTON - 21209

Sunny, very large 1 Br in an old & elegant downtown mansion. Hdwd flrs, 3 ceil fans, DR, walk in closet, laundry in bldg. No pets. $795/mo, includes heat & hot water. Don 410-448-3630

citypaper.com

FREE RENT

(If move-in by Feb15th)

Save $100/mo

on your lease* *Certain restrictions apply

UĂŠ Â˜ĂŒiĂ€VÂœÂ“ĂŠ Â˜ĂŒĂ€>˜ViĂŠ UĂŠÂŁ]ĂŠĂ“]ĂŠEĂŠĂŽĂŠ ,ĂŠ ÂŤĂŒĂƒ°ĂŠ Ă›>ˆÂ?°ĂŠ UĂŠ Ă•Â?Â?ĂŠ7>ĂƒÂ…iÀÊ>˜`ĂŠ ÀÞiÀÊ UĂŠĂ“{Â‡Â…ÂœĂ•Ă€ĂŠ ÂˆĂŒÂ˜iĂƒĂƒĂŠ iÂ˜ĂŒiÀÊ UĂŠ 1-/ĂŠ- ĂŠ/"ĂŠ 6 ™>Â“ĂŠĂŒÂœĂŠĂˆÂŤÂ“ĂŠ œ˜q/Â…Ă•Ă€Ăƒ Ă€ÂˆĂŠÂ™>Â“ĂŠĂŒÂœĂŠ{\ĂŽäÂ“ -Ă•Â˜`>ÞʣӍ“qx“ Ă‡Ăˆ£äĂŠ,iĂƒiÀÛiĂŠ ÂˆĂ€VÂ?i] 7ˆ˜`ĂƒÂœĂ€ĂŠ ˆÂ?Â?]ĂŠ ĂŠĂ“ÂŁĂ“{{

ONLY $65 PER WEEK! Advertise your Open House for just $65 per week. Includes a picture of your house, the headline and address in bold and 6 lines of text to describe your property. Call Emily at 443-452-1521 for details WALBROOK – 21216

1 BR APT ONE MONTH FREE 3008 Clifton Av Quiet block, $500/m ONE MONTH FREE. 443-677-1995 charla.davis@yahoo.com WAVERLY

Windsor Mill’s Best Kept Secret

Call For Directions‌

410-281-0075

ROWHOUSE Newly remodeled 2 Br. Modern kitch & Ba, central HVAC, hdwd flrs. No smoking/pets. Refs req. $975/mo. 410-977-0200


FOR RENT

*‡ 7‡ < *t

/°ĂŠ7 - /" * ,/ /-

BAYVIEW – 21224

HOUSE/THS RENTAL (CITY) 865

AAA ALL AREAS BELVEDERE SQ: 3 Br, 3 Ba, new 2 sty hse, Fpl, garg! Bring Pets! CANTON: 6 room, 2 story! Lease purch! Fee paid, Cath ceil! $900's CHARLES VILLAGE: 2 Br, 2 story hse, f/bsmt, fncd yd, pets ok $850 FEDERAL HILL: Spacious 5 Br, 2 Ba, hdwd flrs, appls $1000 NO CREDIT CHECK! : 4 Br, 2 Ba, 2 sty home! Yard, save at $700! FELLS POINT: 4 Br, 2 Ba renovated single! Yd, W/D, lrg Kitch, $1100's LIBERTY SQ: 3 Br, 2 sty, hdwd flrs, fncd yd, air, bsmt $800

LOCATORS

410-814-7222 MONEY BACK GUARANTEE! SMALL FEE 25 YEARS EXPERIENCE www.Locatorsonline.com NO CREDIT CHECKS ON MANY ALL AREAS

RENT TO OWN! Prime locations in S.E. Balt. For W-2 employed buyers, mortgage prequalifications avail. 240-274-1061 CLASSIFIEDS UPDATED DAILY AT WWW.CITYPAPER.COM BALTIMORE CITY - 21216

CITY RENTALS 2-4 Br Apts & Homes. Monument, Elmley, Dukeland, Hilton, Popland, Ellamont, Poplar Grove, Montipelier & Dorchester. Call Michelle 410-244-0052 BALTIMORE CITY - 21223

2513 W. LOMBARD STREET Gorgeous, Newly Renovated 3 Br, 1 Ba. All New Ceramic Kitch with New Cabinets & Appls. All New Bathroom. $30 app fee. Section 8 Welcome! Call 410-963-5570

BALTIMORE CITY/COUNTY

STOP RENTING Own your home today! Only $1000 down. 443-532-3016 BALTIMORE CITY

EXCEL PROPERTY

FAMILY AREA 2 Br, 1.5 Ba, fnsd bsmt, fncd, bk yd/patio, W/D, CAC. $1100/mo Pets OK! 410-812-0098

BELVEDERE SQ 3 BR, 3 Ba new 2 story hse! Fplc! Locators 410-814-7222 sm fee BROOKLYN - 21225

AVAILABLE NOW 2 Br, f/bsmt $850 Section 8 OK! Call 301-379-2378

BUTCHERS HILL - 21231

1 MO FREE RENT! 2 Br, 1.5 Ba completely rehabbed TH. New appliances and carpet. W/D hook-up. 118 S Durham St. Close to Fells Point. $1325/mo. 410-971-6733 / 410-647-2222 BUY FORECLOSURES & REPOS!

4 BED, 2 BA! $29,900

SECTION 8 OK! 1, 2, 3 & 4 Bedroom homes Available Immediately. For a complete list go to www.TotalMgmtLLC.com 443-794-6286

CLOSE TO SQUARE WITH PARKING 2 BR, 2 ½ BA Townhouse. Hdwd floors, W/W Carpet in the bedrooms. Updated appliances, W/D, Dishwasher, Finished den with Second kitchen/full bath/separate entrance. Parking pad in rear, Rooftop Deck. Within walking distance to Merritt Athletic club, Safeway, Marina, Restaurants etc. $1300/mo w/ 1 year lease. 1st & Last month's rent + SD upon signing. Pet Deposit Req'd for pets. Utilities not included. No Sec 8! Call Anne Marie at 813-892-0038

CANTON 6 rm 2 sty lease purch, fee pd! $900s Locators 410-814-7222 sm fee

CHARLES VILL 2+ BR, fin bsmt, pets ok, yd, $850. Locators 410-814-7222 sm fee CHARLES VILLAGE - 21211

Must see! Only 5% down, 15 yrs @ 8%! For listings, 1-800-585-3617 ext. 1354

2705 HUNTINGDON AVE - RENT / BUY

CANTON – 21224

Near JHU, I-83, Charles Village, Spacious Row House in nice area, Fully remodeled, 3 Bedroom, 2 Full Bath, Living Room, Dining Room, Kitchen, Ceiling Fans, Washer / Dryer, Deck. Monthly Rent $ 600 (One person), $ 800 (Two People), Pets OK. Leave Message 703-980-9885. Open House Sunday 2-3 PM

BEAUTIFUL 2 Br, 2 ½ Ba townhome. Brand new kitchen cabinets and appls, W/D, pantry, walk-in closets, skylights, gas heat, CAC. Walk to Square & Patt Park. $1250/mo. 410-707-1885

DOWNTOWN / UMAB/ RIDGELY'S DELIGHT- 21230

CANTON - 21224

CANTON 1, 2, & 3 bedroom town homes and apartments available in desired locations in and around Baltimore. Rents begin at $700/mo to $3000/mo. Seasonal Specials Available & Pets ok'd w/add'l fee. Call 410-342-2205 or visit www.cantonmanagement.com

WALK TO UMAB DOWNTOWN Super attractive 4 Br, 2 ½ Ba w/ hdwd flrs, CAC, d/w, ceiling fans, W/D, off st parking, etc. $1795/mo. 410-653-8192 "I found City Paper very effective‌ I received many phone calls and rented my place in 2 days!" – J.O., Apartment Advertiser, Federal Hill

HOLLY LANE A PA RT M E N T S FREE HEAT!

412 22nd, 5BR $1400 - 21218 931 Ellicott, 2 BR $1000 – 21216 Other Properties Available! Call 443-255-9465 BALTIMORE CITY

CANTON - 21224

is now featuring a Newly Renovated Community!

FEATURES

t -BVOESZ GBDJMJUZ OFFICE HOURS t %JTQPTBM .POEBZ 'SJEBZ t 1BUJP CBMDPOZ 4BUVSEBZ t $BCMF TBUFMMJUF t $POUSPMMFE BDDFTT t 8BMM UP XBMM DBSQFU NJOJ CMJOET t $FJMJOH GBOT JO EJOJOH BSFB t #SJDL FYUFSJPS QSJWBUF CBMDPOJFT t %PVCMF HMBTT XJOEPXT TUPSN EPPST t $PVOUSZ MJWJOH XJUI DJUZ DPOWFOJFODF

1 Br’s from $795 2 Br’s from $895 A Treasure in Cedonia!

%JSFDUJPOT 5BLF * UP .PSBWJB 3E FYJU .BLF B SJHIU UVSO BU (VOUIFS "WFOVF DPOUJOVF UP EFBE FOE BOE NBLF B SJHIU PO $SFOTIBX "WFOVF $PNNVOJUZ PO MFGU 'SPN #FMUXBZ FYJU BU #FM "JS 3PBE 3PVUF 4PVUI 5VSO MFGU PO .PSBWJB BOE MFGU PO (VOUIFS 1SPDFFE UP EFBE FOE BOE UVSO SJHIU

Holly Lane Apartments $SFOTIBX "WF t #BMUJNPSF .% Phone: (410)485-8180 Fax: (410)485-8181

Fresh faces and new spaces. Spread out and enjoy the nature, community and everything else Mt. Washington has to offer! / ĂŠ "-/ĂŠ1 +1 ĂŠ * ,/ /-ĂŠ ĂŠ/ ĂŠ , t We offer a variety of discounts for seniors, police, teachers, and military.

-/1 "ĂŠfĂˆ{™ÊÊUĂŠĂŠ" ĂŠ ,ĂŠfnәÊÊUĂŠĂŠ/7"ĂŠ ,ĂŠfn{™

410-358-9343

www.marylandmanagement.com

GET RESULTS ADVERTISE YOUR RENTAL PROPERTY WITH CITY PAPER Our rental section is fast and effective. First-Time advertisers we’re so conďŹ dent we’ll get your place rented, we’ll give you a FREE WEEK to prove it! That’s right, buy 4 weeks & your 5th week is free - if you need it.* For more information, or to take advantage of our special, call 410-523-3100 or e-mail ajensen@ citypaper.com *Introductory special applies only to new advertisers or customers who have not advertised in at least one year.

Downtown

James

St

Apartments

Place

1 Br $995 2 Br $1365

St James Place Ask about our Move-In Specials!

Lovingly renovated elevator service building has immediate occupancy on 2 BR, 1 BA apartments. Features include oversized windows with blinds, modern bath, fully applianced kitchen, neutral w/w carpet, open oor plan ideal for entertaining. On-site ďŹ tness and laundry facility. Parking available. On light rail line - great location for commuting without using gas! Choose 12, 15, or 18 month lease term. Call Melanie - 443-506-9333 for more information. citypaper.com

FEBRUARY

4,

2009

Showing by appt. only.

city paper | 93


FOR RENT

REAL ESTATE

HOPKINS HOSPITAL – 21224

HOUSE/THS RENTAL (CITY) 865

2906 ORLEANS ST 3 Br, newly renov. $825 + G&E. Call 410-367-8566

FEDERAL HILL – 21230

½ OFF SEC DEP!! 3 BIG BR(perfect for roommates) + Den, 2 Full BA. Totally renov't end unit w/ tons of windows & natural light, pkg, rftp deck, Hdwd flrs, exp brick, granite, SS app, a breakfast bar & tons of cabinet space in the kit. W/D 1 blk Riverside Park! $2100/mo 443-255-7392

FEDERAL HILL - 21230

PRICE REDUCED!! 3 BR, 1.5 BA Rowhouse at Fort Ave & Henry. CAC, Dishwasher, W/D, Hdwd Flrs throughout, Grass in private fenced in yard, close to I-95 & Riverside park. Ample Free parking. Available NOW! Pets OK! $1300/mo + SD. Call 410-627-0669

FEDERAL HILL 5 BR 2 Ba, hdwd flrs, appls, $1000. Locators 410-814-7222 sm fee FEDERAL HILL AREA - 21230

JACKSON STREET Newly renovated 2 Br, 1 Ba, CAC, deck with Harbor view. $1095/mo. Call 410-685-2266

INNER HARBOR/UMAB - 21202

LUXURY TH 3 Br, 2 Ba. Newly Rnvtd. Dramatic Interior, CAC, W/D, d/w, hdwd flrs, FP, yard, 3rd flr deck with city view. Close to Harbor. Pets negotiable. $1300/mo. Call 410-560-2838

JHH AREA - 21205

3 BEDROOM, 1 BATH RENTALS! 3 Br, 1 Ba recently redone TH clean, fresh paint! 818 N Montford $895/mo 721 N. Streeper $850/mo Accepting Section 8 Vouchers. 410-971-6733 OR 410-971-7323 JOHNS HOPKINS HOSP – 21213

5 MIN FM JH HOSP Cool Living presents property No 2 More for your money! Totally renov 4 Br, 2.5 Ba eat-in kitch, fin bsmt. Gas heat, CAC, laundry rm & security system. 1500 Blk N Bond St. $1500 +utils 301-343-6078

LIBERTY SQ 3 BR 2 sty, hdwd, yd, air, bsmt, $800 Locators 410-814-7222 sm fee

NO CRED CHECK!

FELLS POINT – 21231

PERFECT Very nice 2 BR, 1 ½ BA. 2222 Bank St. Rooftop deck, CAC, W/D, DW, Hdwd Flrs, Exposed Brick. Fenced Backyard, Pets OK. $950/mo + Utils. No Sec 8. Avail Now! Call Mark 410-893-5145

FELLS POINT 4 BR 2 Ba renov, yd, W/D, $1100s Locators 410-814-7222 sm fee HARFORD ROAD - 21214

5100 BLOCK 3 Br, 1 Ba, updated, hdwd flrs, gas heat. $1150/mo. 410-365-6930 HIGHLANDTOWN

300 BLOCK CONKLING ST 2 Br, 1 Ba, w/w carpet, CAC, W/D, d/w. $820/mo + utils. Available now. Call 443-803-4800 Pics at eamre.com

4 BR 3 Ba 2 sty hse! Save at $700! Locators 410-814-7222 sm fee NORTH BALTIMORE - 21218

TOTALLY RENOVATED 3 BR, 1 BA Victorian House Hardwood Floors, Newly Renovated Kitchen, Laundry Room on 1st Floor. $925/mo + $925 Security Deposit + $125 Water Bill Security Deposit. No Pets, No Section 8. Serious Applicants ONLY Call 410-235-1736 9 a.m. – 5 p.m. ONLY

NW BALTIMORE Furn. 2 Br TH & unfurn. 3 Br TH. Hdwd flrs, conv loc. 410-265-6793

3 BR 1 BA

4908 PEMBRIDGE Modern 2 Br, gas heat, $775+ G&E 410-367-8566

FEBRUARY

WASHINGTON VILLAGE - 21230

631 WYETH ST 2 Br 1 Ba, Renovated hse. Excellent location. $750/mo Call Sydney 410-925-3450

Click through to our real estate section as well to view the most current listings

QUESTIONS? Call 443.452.1520 and ask for Rob Farley

WEST BALTIMORE

1,2,3,4 BR HOMES Programs welcome 301-502-8276

It’s FREE!

4, 2009

citypaper.com

OPEN HOUSE PAGE to help you with your home search.

AGENTS or FSBO’sInterested in posting your open house? Why not? Send the info to: Rfarley@citypaper.com

PLEASE INCLUDE:

WEST BALTIMORE

1926 HARLEM AVE

t PG #FESPPNT BOE #BUIT t 1SJDF t %BUF

t %FTDSJQUJPO t "EESFTT t 1IPUP

4 Br, 1.5 Ba, Updated, W/D, refrig & range. Wooden flrs. Avail Now!!. $1500/mo.

1131 POPLAR GROVE ST 3 Br, 1 Ba, Updated and Clean. W/D, range, refrigerator. $900/mo Vouchers Accepted. No Pets Call 410-592-6002

COMMERCIAL SPACE RENTAL 875

WWW.CITYPAPER.COM/OPENHOUSE "2//+,9.Ă&#x;'2%%. ./7Ă&#x;!6!),!",%

FELLS POINT - 21231

2012 FLEET ST Retail/Office Space w/ Conference rm, reception area & 34'x20' add'l office space. 2 rear pkg spaces incld. $1999/mo + utils. 301-257-7329

VACATION RENTALS

880

DEEP CREEK, MD 21520 - Adorable cedar-sided cabin provides front row seats for your mountain entertainment. This 3 Br, 3 Ba home has all the country charm that you will need for your getaway. For more information, visit www.deepcreek.com or call 1-800-846-RENT and ask about LANDMARK VILLAGE #1

LE LAB I A Ă&#x;!V ELP ( Ă&#x; OST GĂ&#x;Ă&#x;# N I S #LO

GREAT BLOCK 3 Br. $1495 + utils/sec. Inc Water! Charming & spacious, steps to the park! Newly renov, w/d. No sec 8, pets ok 443-691-9601 Windsor@cablespeed.com

Recently Rehabbed. W/D, CAC, b/yd. $1200/mo + s.d. 240-274-1061

94 | city paper

RECENT REHAB 2635 Miles Ave. 2 BR, 1 BA. D/W, garbage disposal, fridge & micro. Sec 8 OK. Call Gary 410-879-2212

PATTERSON PARK - 21224

PIMLICO – 21215

HIGHLANDTOWN

City Paper now has an

REMINGTON – 21211

MAKE YOUR AD STAND OUT! Add your company's logo to your Classified Line ad! Call Nicole at 443-452-1522 for details

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REAL ESTATE HIGHLANDTOWN - 21224

REAL ESTATE SERVICES 904

H;7B ;IJ7J;

/&&#///

OPEN HOUSES

ATTENTION 1ST TIME BUYERS

Best price guaranteed! winklerinvestorgroup.com 410-982-1413

You May Qualify for Down Payment, Closing Cost and Mortgage Curtailment Assistance. 905 Bonaparte Ave – Very nice 2 bdrm, bath, LR, Combo DR & kit, fin bsmt. $65,000/$84 G.R. Hughes Realty 410-435-4556

HOMES FOR $30,000

"Please cancel my ad! You (City Paper) did it again! I rented my apartment in just one week!" – J.D., Apartment Advertiser

930

BALTIMORE CITY – 21218

SELL YOUR HOUSE TODAY

900

Buy foreclosures! Must sell now! 1-4 bedrooms. For listings, call 1-800-903-7136 (AAN CAN)

REAL ESTATE (CITY)

MAKE YOUR AD STAND OUT! Add your company's logo to your Classified Line ad! Call Nicole at 443-452-1522 for details

REACH PROSPECTS PLANNING TO BUY! 22% of City Paper readers plan to buy a home in the next year. Call Gemma at 443-452-1523 to place your ad today!

DON’T MISS THIS! Rehabbed from Top to Bottom! 2 Br, 3 Ba, Full bsmt. $289,900 316 S Robinson St. 410-687-3252 443-248-2441 / 410-458-4538

STATION NORTH OPEN SUNDAY 1714 GUILFORD AVE FEBRUARY 8TH AND 15TH FROM 12-3 3 bed, 2.5 bath, Everything NEW, 3 full levels, High-end finishes, Rooftop deck, Parking Attn: Johns Hopkins Employees – Live Near Your Work $17K Closing Help Available!

UPPER FELLS POINT - 21231

PRICE REDUCTION Historic 3 Story T/H by Hopkins. 10 Rms Ttl Rehab. Kraftmaid Kitch w/ new appls. $308,598. Pat Ogle Exit Realty 443-250-2812 "I received seventy-some calls and rented to the first caller. I could have rented half the city with the one ad!" A.F., Apartment Advertiser

5 year Rehab Tax credit - Save Hundreds of $$ Monthly!

$ 249,900 Michael Schiff 410.404.8836 410.583.0400 www.MichaelJSchiff.com

Station North – Arts & Entertainment Special Tax District for Artist! Michael Dicea Mortgage Consultant 410-354-8723 - office 443-610-3564 - cell

SPECIAL FINANCING AVAILABLE!

Located 6 Miles From The Inner Harbor And Less Than 1 Mile To I-695. Close To UMBC & Patapsco State Park.

The Lowest Priced New Condominiums And 3-Level Townhomes In Baltimore City! An Urban Lifestyle In A Picturesque Setting. From The $170’s. You’ll truly enjoy the best of both worlds at Wyndholme Woods, a new community of 3-level townhomes and condominiums in Baltimore City. Perched on a hilltop with picturesque views of the city, this metropolitan oasis combines the convenience of an urban lifestyle with the charm of suburban living. Passing by the entrance’s gracious stone walls, you’ll experience a sense of arrival marked by low-maintenance living, abundant parking and a serene, wooded setting. Yet the Beltway is less than a mile away, putting every downtown destination within easy reach. Head to Fells Point for a night out with friends, enjoy a short commute to the financial district or cheer on your team at Camden Yards. Neighboring Catonsville provides everyday conveniences, quaint shopping and dining, and plentiful outdoor recreation. So don’t compromise! Own a stunning new home in a beautiful location with every urban amenity at your fingertips.

LOOKING FOR THE RIGHT PRICE, RIGHT NOW? INTRODUCING THE RYAN HOMES PREFERRED PRICING PROGRAM. OUR BEST PRICES UPFRONT ... AND UNBEATABLE!

The Fairmont from $229,990

The Hampton Court from $179,990

• Up to 3 bedrooms and 2 bathrooms • 2-car garage • Up to 1,400 sq. ft. of living space • Timberlake® kitchen cabinetry • G.E.® appliance package including a refrigerator, washer, dryer, range and dishwasher

• 3 bedrooms and up to 3 1/2 bathrooms • Up to 2,585 sq. ft. of living space • Timberlake® kitchen cabinetry • G.E.® appliance package including a refrigerator, washer, dryer, range and dishwasher

Wyndholme Woods Directions: Take I-695 S. toward I-95 S./Glen Burnie/Baltimore. Take Exit 13 (MD-144/Frederick Rd.) toward Catonsville. Left at Frederick Rd./ MD-144. Proceed on Frederick Rd. for 1.2 mi. Community on right.

Phone: (866) 676-2561 Hours: Mon. 2-7, Tues.- Fri. 10-6, Sat. & Sun. 11-6 Prices, financing, and offers subject to change without notice. See a sales representative for details. MHBR No. 56

ryanhomes.com citypaper.com

FEBRUARY

4,

2009

city paper | 95


0AJAMA "RUNCH

BACK COVER

Starting at $1220

THINK BIG‌

WEAR YOUR PJ’s & GET HALF OFF FOOD & BOOZE WEAR YOUR PJ’s, NO SWEATS! MOM HAS FINAL SAY ON PROPER ATTIRE!

()34/2)#!,,9 ()0 &%$%2!, (),, s 3/54( #(!2,%3 342%%4 s WWW MOTHERSGRILLE COM s

20% OFF ANY SERVICE

Advertise it here, call Classified at 410-523-2300 today!

The Quarter Luxury Apartment Homes

35.$!9 &%"25!29 4( s !- 0-

WANNA RUCK!?

GREAT MOVE-IN SPECIALS! Located in Baltimore, Essex, Fells Point, Cockeysville, Towson and Owings Mills. Call 1-888-STORAGE or visit www.extraspace.com

WITH THIS AD 6715 YORK ROAD, TOWSON CALL 410-377-2056

PET PORTRAITS BY PETER

Play for Baltimore's Nationally Ranked Women's Rugby Team No Experience Necessary Email:chesapeakewrfc@gmail.com

FRESH & CLEAN HARDWOOD FLOORING

An original watercolor portrait of your pet friend! From $100. Call 443-491-3477 or email pfharrington@live.com

BIG LUXURY BIG APARTMENTS

INSTANT CASH! Below Wholesale Prices on All Jewelry & Diamonds! Licensed & Bonded. 410-563-1300 2201 E. Monument St, 21215 www.alphagoldexchange.com

BIG VIEWS

CI TY PA PE R RE AD ER S: Mentio

n and rec thi s ad ieve off on 1st $10 00 vis it!

WE BUY HOUSES Wanted Homes & Rentals for Fast CASH offers. Free Estimates‌ Call 410-746-8276

No monthly pet rent! Pet Friendly*

ARCHITECTURAL CONFECTIONARIES Competition at BMI on Sat, Feb 14, 2009. Call 410-727-4808 x.146 for more details. www.thebmi.org

*Breed restrictions do apply

J^[ GkWhj[h /*. :kbWd[o LWbb[o HeWZ Jemied" CWhobWdZ ('(&*

410-296-4321-Phone 410-296-4438-Fax J^[gkWhj[h6bWd[YecfWdo$Yec

BANKRUPTCY THE CRESCENT AT FELLS POINT Ultimate Urban Waterfront Address

Start Fresh with Chapter 7. Attorney Zell Gilden 410-336-3775 www.bankruptcybluesmaryland.com We are a debt relief agency

4355 Park Heights Avenue Baltimore, MD 21215 Call 24/7 410-466-5531

GOODBYE TO STRESS

DONATE YOUR CAR

951 Fell Street • Baltimore, Maryland 21231

CrescentFellsPoint.com

P 410.534.VIEW

101 WELLS

IN AND OUT BAIL BONDS

*Pricing & specials subject to change

Hire a Personal Assistant and start delegating your To-Do list. Visit: www.leaveittoem.com Or call Emily at 410-446-9597

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One Bedrooms starting at $1,155 and Two Bedrooms starting at $1,450. Reserve TODAY and receive ONE MONTH FREE! £ä£ĂŠ -/ĂŠ7 -ĂŠ-/ʇÊ / ", ʇÊÓ£ÓÎäĂŠUĂŠ{{ĂŽÂ‡Â™Ă“Ă‡Â‡ĂˆĂˆnĂŽĂŠUĂŠ777°£ä£7 -° "

FREE Same day Pick-up/Tow IRS Tax Deductible Help Kids in Need

1-800-699-7566

SANDING, REFINISHING, INSTALLATION & REPAIRS 20 YEARS OF SERVICING MD 410-486-1606 FREE ESTIMATES

Hurry, offer ends February 12, 2009. *Terms and conditions apply.

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WE BUY HOUSES We Buy Pretty, Ugly or Anywhere In Between. Fast Cash & Quick Closing. Call 443-415-0790 or email kennedypgllc@gmail.com

$500 POLICE IMPOUNDS! Cars/Trucks from $500! Hondas/Acuras, Chevys,etc. For Listings 800-585-3563 x 3825

Bare Hills • Canton • Cranbrook 24 hr Downtown • Eldersburg • Fort Avenue Owings Mills • Security • 24hr Tide Point • Towson

1.800.new.shape 1.800.639.7427

www.merrittclubs.com

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BAND REHEARSAL Highlandtown, Stadium & Essex. Secure parking. Heat/AC, Elec. Baltimore's Best. 443-831-2263 www.bandrehearsal.net

WHERE LUXURY AND CONVENIENCE MEET

THE GREENEHOUSE

One Bedroom starting at $1,200 and Two Bedrooms starting at $1,600. For a limited time, reserve an apartment and receive 2 months FREE. x£™Ê7°ĂŠ*, //ĂŠ-/°ĂŠ / ", ĂŠĂ“ÂŁĂ“ä£ĂŠUĂŠ{{ĂŽÂ‡Â™Ă“Ă‡Â‡ĂˆĂˆnĂŽĂŠUĂŠ777° , "1- ° "

Algorithme Pharma is now conducting short-term clinical trials! ( 4 1 0 ) 3 8 5 - 4 6 6 7 We are currently seeking men and women, non-smokers and light-smokers, ages 18 and older, to participate in a research study of known medications. You could receive from $700 to $4,000* in compensation as well as study-related medical evaluation at no cost. * Compensation based on the completed study, length of stay and number of return visits. Several studies are available.

1-800-787-1100

www.sciencepays.com


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