B4
CCF Recorder
Life
November 25, 2010
What do you have that you have not received? Here dies another day During which I have had eyes, ears, hands And the great world around me; And tomorrow begins another. Why am I allowed two?
G.K. Chesterton
Have you ever had the feeling of receiving more than you ever expected? When I was a pastor years ago, a businessman who was a parishioner offered me the free use of a new automobile. I was dumfounded with his generosity. Several years later he replaced it with another new one. I gulped again! – “Why am I allowed two?� Why don’t I feel that way about each day God gives me? Does the amazing become too familiar? The world is a gift bag of colors, music, beauty, people to love and be loved by, emotions, and a rich
texture of events. “All our senses are given for us to enjoy and to praise God. The smell of the sea, the blossom borne on the wind, the soft flesh of a little baby; the taste of a ripe plum or bread fresh from the oven, the feel of cat’s fur, or the body of a lover,� writes Bella Bown. English author G.K. Chesterton calls the pleasures of life “the remnants of paradise that wash up on our shore.� Sadly, in the midst of daily wonders, we rarely feel fortunate. We focus on what we don’t have. Our sense of entitlement has become much stronger. One millennium ago half the population of Europe died before the age of 5. Life expectancy in the Western world at the beginning of last century averaged only 47.3 years. Now it’s in the middle or upper 70s. It’s as though we have two
lifetimes now – “Why am I allowed two?� Gratitude requires a certain awareness and humility. Children don’t have that yet. They take things for granted. They’re not yet conscious of the significance of gifts. They can’t emotionally trace gifts back to the hearts of the ones who give them and the good those hearts wish them. Sometime, perhaps, they’ll be swept off their feet with thankfulness. A frequent quote I recall from the scriptures asks, “What do you have that you did not receive? And if you received it as a gift, why take the credit to yourself?� (1 Corinthians 4:7). Our personal stream of gifts begins with the gift of life. Yet, one of our temptations is to fear admitting the beneficence of God in our lives. We fear that acknowledging
God’s love and graciousness could “capture us� and lead us to a loss of self. Poet Frances Thompson admitted such a fear. He wrote: “Lest in having thee, I might have naught else besides.� Most human gifts are conditional gifts, they come with strings attached, quid-pro-quo expectations. These are not the purest of gifts. It’s possible for children to grow up doubting the love of their parents. They know they received a lot of material gifts, maybe even an excessive amount. But such excessive gifting can be intuitively understood as trying to make up for the absence of genuine love: “See how much I (don’t) love you by all these things?� And at other times overindulgent giving can be a manipulation to capture and gain control of another’s self: “After all I’ve done
for you, and you won’t‌!� S t r i n g s attached to gifts Father Lou can tie up our Guntzelman freedom to be Perspectives ourselves. Is God guilty of these types of giving? Is he out to capture and control us? God would be disrespecting the great gift of human freedom he’s given us if he tries to abridge it in any way. God’s gifts come just because he loves us. Usually this unconditional love God has for each of us is one of the last things we realize. We’re so used to the quid-pro-quo types. Father Lou Guntzelman is a Catholic priest of the Archdiocese of Cincinnati. Contact him at columns@community press.com or P.O. Box 428541, Cincinnati, OH 45242.
Everyone needs to consider making a will It may be hard to believe but statistics show most Americans will die without having made up a will. The numbers I’ve seen say 55 percent and 60 percent of people have no will, even if they have children and assets. Many feel uncomfortable
talking about death, but it’s something even those who don’t have a family need to think consider. Ronal Patton of Norwood has paid more than $1,000 for the funeral of his brother Ernest. He still owes the funeral home nearly $600, and
Ernest left some money in a bank account – but Ronal can’t get access to the account. “I didn’t have power of attorney or anything like that and he didn’t leave a will. There’s only a couple of hundred dollars in the bank account,� Ronal said.
Mary is 34 years old. d. She just purchased her ďŹ rst home and is searching for the perfect couch.
“I’d like for the bank to send it to the funeral home. I don’t want it. I don’t want the money,� he said. Ernest wasn’t married and had no children. Other than that bank account, with nearly $200 in it, he had no other assets. His sister agrees the money should go to pay for his funeral expenses. “I just want to try to get it paid off, and I’m on a fixed income with not a whole lot of money. It’s a great funeral home and they told me don’t worry about it, but I do worry about it. I want to get it paid,� said Ronal. “Two hundred dollars doesn’t seem like a lot but when you’re broke and you’re living on a fixed income it’s a whole lot,� he said. In order to get the bank to release the money you have to go to the county Probate Court and seek a
court order. So, I went to Hamilton County Probate Court Judge James Cissell. “Well, he can file a very simple process called Summary Relief from Administration. It’s good for up to $5,000. With the order that comes out of this he’ll be able to take it to the bank and have the money released to him, in his case, because he was the one that paid the funeral bill,� Cissell said. Cissell said this is a very common problem when people die without leaving a will. But, you don’t even need a will to direct the money in your bank account. You can tell the bank to add a Pay on Death provision to your account in which you state to whom you want to leave the money. Transfers on Death provisions are also available for securities, titled vehicles and real estate. So, even if you don’t
make up a will, you can still d i r e c t w h e r e y o u r assets will go upon y o u r Howard Ain death. HowHey Howard! ever, if you do have children you certainly need to make up a will so you can direct what will happen to them if you and your spouse die. Otherwise, the court will decide who will raise your children. In this case, Ronal got the court order, got the money from the bank, and sent it off to the funeral home. Howard Ain answers consumer complaints weekdays on WKRC-TV Local 12. Write to him at 12 WKRC-TV, 1906 Highland Ave., Cincinnati 45219.
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