Life
Death has no favorites – even celebrities die A lot of famous people have died recently and that bothers us. It bothers us because the fact of death bothers us terribly. In every life death anxiety is operative in great and small ways. Leavings and losings are not on our agenda. And the second reason we’re bothered over these recent deaths is because they have shattered our suppositions. We suppose that if a person has prestige, wealth, celebrity and popularity that those facts bring with them a certain degree of immortality. We suppose important people (presuming they are) have a charmed life and are too important to lose. Death is supposed to show them the same favoritism we do and back
off. How unsettled we are when we become aware that death plays no favorites. The day of our death is always thought of as far off. The day we come to know we will eventually die – not know it merely in our minds but realize it in our hearts – that day is the day we become a philosopher. Thereafter we pose momentous questions to ourselves and it takes the rest of our lives to answer them. It’s a sad occurrence when favored people never even let themselves get to the questions. Among the questions that arise are ones such as: How should I live knowing I will die some day? Why love anyone at all if they can be taken away from me, and I from them?
Eastern Hills Press
July 15, 2009
Is it better to be cautious and avoid the risk of great love for someone in order to be safe from the heartache of grief? Is there more life after this world’s life that is even more desirable, or is there only disintegration and dry nothingness? Is there a God who created me, loves me, and keeps me alive eternally? The alternative to struggling with questions such as these is to employ certain defenses against the questions ever arising. Hedonism says we can become impervious to death anxiety if we “eat, drink, and be merry.” Denial says, “Just don’t think about it and keep busy.” Agnostic practicality asks, “Why try to live life wholeheartedly if it will all end?”
Ernest Becker acknowledges this strange way of thinking: “The irony of man’s condition is that the deepest need is to be free of the anxiety of death and annihilation; but it is life itself which awakens it, and so we shrink from being fully alive.” Will it help us diminish death anxiety if we draw back from life, from deeply loving, from compassion and enjoyment and closeness to another person? The answer - like so many other answers – is another of life’s paradoxes. Knowing death will come for us some day is the very factor that makes it possible for us to live life now in an authentic fashion. For what is limited is precious, what is plentiful becomes cheap. Knowing our years are limited urges us to appreciate their pre-
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ciousness. Death – rather being only a cause of bleak pessimism – ought to be a catalyst to enjoy authentic life modes now. Father Lou Poet Mary Guntzelman Oliver puts it well: Perspectives When it’s over, I want to say: all my life I was a bride married to amazement. I was the bridegroom taking the world into my arms. … I don’t want to end up simply having visited this world. Father Lou Guntzelman is a Catholic priest of the Archdiocese of Cincinnati. Reach him at columns@community press.com or contact him directly at P.O. Box 428541, Cincinnati, OH 45242. Please include a mailing address or fax number if you wish for him to respond.
Use cash instead of debit to avoid overdraft charges back,” Felts said. After several calls the bank agreed to return the fees, but Felts said what happened is wrong. “The punishment should fit the crime. If there’s a negative $5.90 balance, $104 is absurd, it’s absolutely ridiculous … It’s not right. It can take months for families to recoup these losses,” Felts said. “I’m a family of five, every penny counts, and they’re just taking it like, ‘Oh, it’s no big deal,’ ” she said. As with others I’ve seen in this situation, most of the overdraft fees are caused by the use of a debit card. Instead of putting those small charges on her debit card she could have paid
cash, and Felts says she’s now learned her lesson. “Use cash. People need to start using cash more often,” she said. Felts said the government is enacting new credit card laws and should reevaluate what the banks are doing. The Federal Reserve is now deciding whether to crack down on automatic overdraft protection. A rule is expected later
this year that would prevent banks from manipulating the order of checks and debits so they maximize overdraft fees. Meanwhile, Congress is also listening to consumers and a proposal there would require banks to tell customers when they are at risk of incurring overdraft fees at an ATM machine or cash register so they can cancel the transaction. Troubleshooter Howard Ain
answers consumer complaints and questions weekdays Howard Ain at 5:30 Hey Howard! p.m., 6 p.m. and 11 p.m. newscasts on WKRC-TV Local 12. You can write to him at Hey Howard, 12 WKRC-TV, 1906 Highland Ave., Cincinnati 45219.
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off, $104 – for $5.90. I was just dumbfounded,” Felts said. Felts’ bank had agreed to drop one charge, but not the other two. “It’s a negative $5.90, from what they’re telling me because, if you look at the statement, it shows I have money the whole time – it never went negative. But they keep saying, ‘It’s for pending. It’s for pending,’ ” she said. The “pending” charges are for two debit card purchases of less than $5 each. “We budget our biweekly checks to the penny so $104, that’s our grocery money, that’s our gas in our car. It’s devastating. I was literally begging these people to give me my money
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The nation’s banks continue to raise fees on everything from credit cards to checking accounts. Banks say they need the money to make up for losses they incur during this recession. But customers and consumer groups are crying foul. Banks have come under much criticism for making it easy for customers to spend more money than they have in their account so they can assess overdraft fees. People like Bridget Felts of Milford are furious. She received three overdraft charges recently and said it’s not fair. “This was for a total of a negative $5.90, and they are charging me, with one fee that was already taken