rob hobkirk (con’t). common sense and practical knowledge. Like don’t step in puddles with electric fans.” “Make sure to close the shower door.” “Exactly.” “And you’ve got practical knowledge?” “I have trouble changing the light bulb.” “Too bad. I always wanted a man who could fix things around the house.” “I always wanted a woman who could cook good. How about you? Can you cook?” “Not very well.” “There you go. It all balances out.” “You think it was an accident?” “No, I think it’s because you aren’t interested in cooking.” “I mean about Merton.” “Could have been the C.I.A. or more likely the Vatican.” “Blaming the C.I.A. is such a cliché.” Oh, oh. I’ve alienated her by calling her pretentious because of her bag, that she can’t cook because she doesn’t care. I’m sure she’s sick of me being so friggin’ witty. It’s almost time for her to check her phone and say she has to go. “You’re right. It is a cliché.” “Relax. You aren’t a jerk, at least not a big jerk. I’ve kissed a few princes and found only toads. Tell me some more about Merton. Loved his title of his book Seven Story Mountain. Ever read it?” “No, never did. But I met a monk once who knew Merton. They were monks together in Kentucky.” “What did he have to say about him?” “All he could do was bad mouth Merton. The old Monk said, ‘He called himself a monk, but he wasn’t a monk. Him with his private hut and all, huh.”
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