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Dec 2015 / Jan 2016
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best family holiday? Are you an adventure-seeking family or more prone to… being prone? Maybe you just want to take it easy after a long and busy year. If your family is like mine and prefers a bit of both, then you will be thrilled with our happy holidays issue. As always, our team has rounded up the best Cape Town has to offer (page 36), should you choose the staycation option. We’ve also included some delicious and nutritious recipes, “food for superheroes” (page 26), and in “fired-up fun” we’ve come up with a few fun ideas to keep children learning throughout the silly season (page 28). After all, come January, children who have kept their brains active will be at an advantage when school starts again. Speaking of which, you can rely on our “back to school” resource (page 30) to help you tick all the right boxes and avoid any last-minute madness. From all of us at Child mag, have a happy holiday, stay safe and relish this rare chunk of family time.
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Cape Town’s Child magazineTM is published monthly by Hunter House Publishing, PO Box 12002, Mill Street, 8010. Office address: Unit 7, Canterbury Studios, 35 Wesley Street, Gardens, Cape Town. Tel: 021 465 6093, fax: 021 462 2680, email: info@childmag.co.za. Annual subscriptions (for 11 issues) cost R165, including VAT and postage inside SA. Printed by Paarl Web. Copyright subsists in all work published in Cape Town’s Child magazineTM. We welcome submissions but retain the unrestricted right to change any received copy. We are under no obligation to return unsolicited copy. The magazine, or part thereof, may not be reproduced or adapted without the prior written permission of the publisher. We take care to ensure our articles, and other editorial content, are accurate and balanced, but cannot accept responsibility for loss, damage or inconvenience that may arise from reading them.
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December 2015 / January 2016
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contents
december 2015 / january 2016
28 fired-up fun 3 a note from lisa
regulars
8 over to you readers respond
12 pregnancy news – beat the heat Anél Lewis looks at ways
features
pregnant moms can keep cool during the warm months
16 mamma mia! Karen Claren and her two sons went on an impromptu adventure to Italy
20 the only child Simcha van Bel-Du Plooy investigates whether children who grow up without siblings are at a disadvantage
22 babysitting fiasco babysitting is not for sissies, as Linda Martindale finds out
24 the naked truth what level of nudity in public and in your own home is acceptable? Samantha Page asks the experts
26 food for superheroes in their book Raising Superheroes, Tim Noakes, Jonno Proudfoot and Bridget Surtees offer delicious, yet nutritious recipes for growing children
28 fired-up fun Lucille Kemp gathers some ideas to keep children busy during the long holidays
health 10 safe, not sorry Marc de Chazal gives some guidelines for keeping your brood safe in and out of water this summer
13 best for baby – winnie don’t poo babies can also suffer from constipation. Marina Zietsman looks at causes and possible solutions
14 dealing with difference – my invisible friend Donna Cobban finds out why children have imaginary friends
30 resource – back to school use these handy tips so you’re not caught unprepared by the new school year. Compiled by Child magazine
34 a good read for the whole family 36 what’s on in december and january 47 next month in child magazine 50 finishing touch Anél Lewis tackles her son’s toilet aversion with cunning tactics
classified ads 47 family marketplace 48 it’s party time
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December 2015 / January 2016
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Cape Town
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Megan Hancock Photography meganhancockphotography.co.za
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December 2015 / January 2016
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letters
best wishes for the festive season This is a photo of our Christmas tree, which my daughter made using your old magazines. Lindeni Mzileni
it’s absolutely perfect to fail Thank you for the article “the prison of perfectionism” (November 2015). It resonated deeply with me as a mother of children who have just entered the schooling system. I think the role of schools needs to be further explored. I work as a facilitator at a fully-inclusive public school, which means they have children with special needs in almost every classroom. I have witnessed a way and philosophy of education that is not only revolutionary, but also demonstrates that each child has a unique contribution to make in the world. The school has achieved excellent academic results, but has somehow managed to “dodge the bullet” of perfectionism – performance and anxiety related to academics.
I have witnessed my own daughter falling prey to this trap, as I have in my life. No doubt, she loves school, her friends and teachers, but the creeping in of performance-driven certificates of honour, praise and the like, is slowly corroding my resolve. This is not the sole responsibility of any school. I take responsibility for my role and perfectionist tendencies. I want her to do her best and to be seen for who she is, not for what she can or has achieved. Is this not what we all want for our children? To be recognised? But maybe that’s where the problem lies. Maybe we should explore the things we wish to be recognised for. I have had to become my children’s gatekeeper and protector in a society that celebrates performance, accolades and pats on the back for a job well done. Somehow in all of this, children are not actually celebrated for their personhood and their unique contribution to the world. My place of work has an amazing daily mention over the school intercom of a child “caught in the act”. It is a special mention made of children who have been observed helping others, being honest, or giving someone who is sad a hug. All children are given an opportunity to play in a team sport, no matter what the results and no matter what their ability. My questions are: Why do we have to outperform each other, whether we are conscious of this or not? Who is
over to you stop bullying on the playground Feeling like I may have missed something, I re-read “bully-proofing your child” (October 2015) several times. The article highlights this scourge (the expression on the cartoon characters’ faces perfectly capture it), but I am left asking “how?” This is a situation that really needs active observation and intervention from schools, but traditionally they have been remiss in providing it. It is my opinion that were teachers to be on the lookout for the start of this behaviour, and appropriate corrective steps made in the junior grades, much of this damaging behaviour could be nipped in the bud. Of course, they deserve their much-needed tea break in the staff room, but a staff member on playground duty should be watching out for children who seem to be alone or isolated or are being victimised, as well as in the classroom situation. I believe this would go a long way in obviating problems before they take hold. I don’t understand why, seemingly world-wide and after so long, it doesn’t seem to be implemented. Inevitably, much of this behaviour might then just go underground, especially with cyber-bullying, but it would go a long way to help. The article states: “Your role as parent is to be supportive and help your child find their own solutions... Follow us on twitter.com/ChildMag, facebook.com/childmag.co.za and pinterest.com/childmagazine
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December 2015 / January 2016
it benefiting? Certainly not my child and certainly not our future generation. Maybe all schools need a lesson about building selfesteem as mentioned in the article. It is good to make mistakes. It is absolutely fine to forfeit a win in the gala if it means everyone has an opportunity to participate. I think schools need to lead by example. Why not show our children that failing and making mistakes are part of life too? Maybe they won’t fall as hard when the day comes. A mother fumbling forward (hopefully) on this road of parenting
thanks Child mag I came across a copy of Child magazine sometime back when I went to see a paediatrician in Sunninghill, Joburg in 2014. I took a copy (July 2014), which I still have today. The reason I still have it is because it is so informative and I keep on referring to it time and again. Legae, Gaborone, Botswana Thanks very much for the article “giving life – become a blood donor”. What a well-written article. I’m sure we’ll get more people visiting our donor centres and phoning us to find out where they can donate. Sifiso Khoza Regional Marketing Manager SANBS
Let us know what’s on your mind. Send your letters or comments to marina@childmag.co.za or PO Box 12002, Mill Street, 8010.
familiarising yourself and your child with the various techniques for dealing effectively in deflecting bullying attacks”. I look forward to further articles that spell out these techniques, which were not covered and did nothing to remove the feeling of helplessness parents, and the bullied child themselves, are left with. The workshops mentioned at the end of the article are long overdue and I am at a loss to understand why all schools have not implemented similar interventions to this worrying, age-old problem many, many years ago. Anonymous
get 10 candles, 10 soaps, 10 boxes of chocolates or 10 funny ornaments? It’s the thought behind the gift that counts. Receiving gifts from pupils is not a given. It is a privilege and they should be accepted with gratitude. In any event, one can usually find a “home” for duplicates. There are many people out there with tough and stressful jobs and they are not rewarded with 30 or more gifts at the end of each year. Keep it simple or next thing we know, there’ll be gift registries for teachers at upmarket stores. Andrea
teacher’s gifts are a privilege
online comment to “when I grow up…”
I read the article “gifts that count” (November 2015) with mixed emotions. I agree that it is nice, even appropriate, for a pupil to give a gift to a teacher at the end of a school year and that gifts and cards made by the pupils themselves are the real treasures. I also realise that the article was aimed at being helpful, but I feel that the writer portrayed some teachers (rightly or wrongly) as being fussy and ungrateful. I used to be a teacher and was always grateful for any gift, big or small, from pupils at the end of each school year. I’d like to think that there are other teachers out there who feel the same. What does it really matter if you
An absolutely brilliant article – we need to prepare our future work force and think ahead. This article says so much about how we plan. We spent billions on the Medupi Power Station (coal-fired), while China is building huge solar-powered plants at the same time. Anand Naidoo subscribe to our newsletter and win Our wins have moved online. Please subscribe to our newsletter and enter our weekly competitions. To subscribe, visit childmag.co.za
We reserve the right to edit and shorten submitted letters. The opinions reflected here are those of our readers and are not necessarily held by Hunter House Publishing.
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magazine cape town
December 2015 / January 2016
9
health
safe, not sorry
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December 2015 / January 2016
Parents need to be extra vigilant to ensure their children stay safe in and out of water. MARC DE CHAZAL gives us some safety reminders. have the necessary skills to resuscitate a child in the event of an emergency? I don’t mean to put a dampener on the outdoorsy fun that characterises the South African summer, but if children are at grave risk of injury or death, we simply can’t afford to be lackadaisical about water safety. Sun safety goes hand in hand with water activities. Sunshine is our main source of vitamin D, but unprotected exposure may result in skin cancer. Experts advise us to use sunscreen appropriately and to ensure it’s a factor of between 15 and 30 for children. It’s also advisable to cover up with sunhats and UV-protective swimwear and to try to stay out of the sun when it is harshest – between 10am and 4pm.
pool safety According to government regulations, “All swimming pools must have a continuous safety barrier maintained by the pool owner that restricts access by young children to the pool”, and the following fencing regulations should be adhered to: • the fence must be an effective barrier to young children • it must be permanent • young children shouldn’t be able to crawl under or climb over it by using foot and hand holds • it must be at least 1,2 metres high. And gates to the pool area must: • swing outward from the pool area • be self-closing from any position • be fitted with a latching device, out of reach of small children, and at least 1,5 metres above ground level. You should also have a well-fitted, good quality net that can hold your child above water over the entire surface of the pool. A subsurface pool alarm is also a good additional safety measure.
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illustration: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM
t
he world has warmed up. Climate change aside, I’m talking about summer time, which means that our beaches, pools and other outdoor spaces will be populated by children having a blast. It certainly beats staying indoors, but summer adds an extra set of parental concerns to an already long list of responsibilities – water and sun safety. “Every year an unacceptable number of children and adults drown,” says Janice Probyn, a swimming instructor in Cape Town. “Drowning is listed as the second highest cause of death in under-15 year olds in South Africa (the highest cause is road accidents). Earlier this year a childminder tried to save a drowning toddler and they both drowned. This is avoidable. Learning to swim is a life skill and will save lives. In most residential areas you will find a choice of swim schools that teach children of all ages to swim. Not only will learning to swim save lives, but it is also an excellent aerobic all-body workout and it can be great fun too.” Getting back to that horrific drowning incident Probyn refers to, how safe is your pool area? Have you enrolled your child in swimming lessons? It’s advisable to start as early as possible. And what about your childminder… can she swim? Is she trained in CPR? For that matter, do you
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December 2015 / January 2016
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beat the heat Rising temperatures can make a summer pregnancy unbearable. ANÉL LEWIS finds out how to beat the heat when you’re expecting.
b
ananarama may have sung about it being a “Cruel Summer” way back in the 80s, but when I was expecting my daughter, it felt as if this song had been written just for me. I was about eight-and-a-half months pregnant in December, and huge. I felt like a beach ball and much like a beach ball, I was at my happiest – and most comfortable – when I was bobbing about in a pool. It was the
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only way I could get through those heavy summer days with a mini watermelonsized baby in my belly. My swollen ankles resembled hunks of corned beef and my feet expanded by at least one shoe size on a good day. Immersing myself in cool water was my only chance of relief. Pregnant women tend to have a higher core body temperature, so it’s not surprising that when the mercury rises in
summer, moms-to-be feel the heat more than everyone else. Kasia MiszewskiCloete of Cape Town also battled with swollen ankles during her pregnancy. “I would put ice on my ankles to help with the swelling,” she says. Cape Town mom Samantha Nadelman also went the ice route when she had to endure a heat wave in the final weeks of her pregnancy. She beat the heat by sitting with her feet in a bucket of ice. Angelique Serrao of Gauteng lived in summer dresses and drank “huge” amounts of lemon juice mixed with soda water. Constrictive clothing will just make you feel more uncomfortable when it’s hot or humid. Opt for natural fabrics such as cotton, and looser outfits. Cape Town-based Jeanne Alblas, who was highly pregnant with her first child through the peak of summer, says maternity dresses are only flattering if you don’t have the rest of your body covered in leggings or long-sleeve tops. She adds: “South-facing houses come in handy in the Cape when you (very unlady-like) sprawl yourself on the couch in front of the open doors of the living room, with one leg slung
over the backrest, to take full advantage of the southerly wind.” She adds that only kitesurfers and pregnant women would get excited about these winds during summer. Yolande Hendrick, also of Cape Town, made sure she was close to air conditioning to get through her summer pregnancy. For Samantha, the office’s air conditioning just wasn’t enough. She resorted to having an “industrial-strength” fan on her desk at work. If you’re still working in your last trimester, and the heat is unbearable, stay inside as much as possible. It’s also a good idea to avoid doing heavy exercise during the warmest times of the day. Other tips include drinking plenty of liquids, especially on hot days. Cut down your salt intake as this can contribute to dehydration. Keep your feet elevated if you are prone to swelling and avoid jewellery that could be a bit tight. Jeanne says she soon realised that the beach was the best spot for a bit of suntanning, as she could scoop out a “belly trench” so that she could catch some rays on her back. But just bear in mind that women are more heat-sensitive when pregnant, so avoid the sun where possible and apply a good SPF.
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PHOTOGRAPH: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM
pregnancy news
best for baby
winnie don’t poo Babies can suffer from constipation, especially if they are formula-fed. MARINA ZIETSMAN looks at possible causes, how to recognise it and what you can do about it.
a illustration: catwalker/shutterstock.com
lthough it’s rare for babies on an all-liquid diet to be constipated, it cannot be ruled out. Formulafed babies are more likely to experience it, as formula is harder to digest than breast milk. Dr Deon Smith, a paediatrician from Cape Town, says parents need to understand what constipation is before searching for causes and solutions. “It’s about the consistency of the stool, not the frequency,” says Smith. A breast-fed baby can poop anywhere from several times a day to once a week. Formulaand dual-fed babies can poop every single day to once every three to four days. Smith says: “As long as the stool is soft, there’s no need to be concerned about constipation.”
what’s the formula? Your baby may have an allergic reaction to the milk, soy, protein or fatty acids in formula. The best advice would be to change the formula, says Smith. “Ask your healthcare practitioner. There are so many formulas on the market with intricate labels, that it can become very confusing. Your paediatrician or clinic sister should be able to advise you.” Smith says it’s a question of trial and error. “Don’t expect to find the solution overnight. Be prepared to try different formulas.”
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if the formula is right Babies often become constipated when they switch to solids and their tiny bodies are getting used to this “new concept”. Fibre is just as important for your baby as it is for you, and certain fruit and veg can help with constipation, such as pears, prunes, peaches, broccoli and beans. Consider avoiding excessive dairy intake, and keep the ABC in mind: apple sauce, bananas and cereals could be the culprits. Smith advises to stay clear of ricebased cereals. Dehydration can also cause constipation. If your baby has been ill or has been on medication preventing her from getting enough breast milk or formula, she can become constipated. Offer your baby a small daily serving of water in addition to usual feedings. If this doesn’t help, give your baby a daily serving of prune or pear juice.
the bottom line Smith says to think of dealing with your baby’s constipation as a programme of trial and error that you need to stick to. “As with formula, gauge which foods you think might be causing constipation and eliminate those. If the problem persists, ask your healthcare practitioner for a lactulose
[a type of laxative that works by softening the stool],” says Smith. You can use an infant glycerine suppository, though these are only meant for occasional use. In her book Tissue Salts for Children, herbalist Margaret Roberts suggests treating constipation in babies with natrum muriaticum (or Nat mur). This is a distributor of water in the body, maintaining the balance of water by osmosis. Smith warns against giving your baby treacle sugar, or any kind of oil, such as flaxseed oil. Also, don’t introduce solids before four to six months of age, and don’t use stimulant laxatives or enemas to treat infant constipation.
signs of constipation • • • • •
Your baby is straining when passing stools, sometimes painfully There might be a little blood in the nappy from a skin tear Hard or dry stools Your baby refuses to feed or passes a lot of wind Your baby has a lack of appetite and is listless or restless
December 2015 / January 2016
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dealing with difference
Many children have an imaginary companion during childhood. DONNA COBBAN finds out if this behaviour should be considered
a
normal or disturbing.
round the age of eight I lived two rather separate lives, one in the here and now, the other locked away and deeply embedded in imagination. To my family, friends and teachers I was me, but in my imaginary world I was Gillian. Unlike imaginary companions, Gillian existed as a kind of alter ego; she was someone I could become when being me was either boring or too taxing. Gillian was my inner superhero, long before commercial superheroes were invented, and she served as a source of comfort in childhood, and later as a teenager, she was a secret source of inspiration.
It is often easier for children to express difficult things by whispering to an imaginary companion in the presence of an adult rather than talking to the adult directly. These days I catch myself watching my own child with interest, an eight-year-old boy, waiting to see if he too might mutter secret conversations under his breath to an invisible other, but research suggests that boys are less likely to create imaginary companions as they spend a significant amount of time with the already imagined world of superheroes. Marjorie Taylor, professor of psychology at the University of Oregon, noted in a 1999 research paper that boys are not necessarily engaged in less role play than girls. The difference, she observed, was that boys are more likely to act out or impersonate the character they are playing with themselves rather than treat it as a separate individual. I watch my son at play, cars strewn asunder, traffic jams, accidents, road rage, ambulances and police all converging on one or more scenes in quick succession. His imagination, like most children’s, is ripe and ready: the police arrest the bad drivers, the baddies steal cars, the chaps with the spoilers make a hasty exit – this is imaginary play with a host of different characters. The next day I arrive on the doorstep of a friend of mine and ask her eight-year-old daughter an “uncontrolled research question”: “Hey, Sophie, when you are playing with your dolls, and one doll needs to say something, do the other dolls also start talking from across the room?” Sophie looks aghast and assures me that when speaking to one another, dolls in her experience spoke only to one another and no one butted in on the conversation.
companionship and nurture Amy* and her husband James* live in Cape Town. Their son Jack* created an imaginary companion, “Poppy”, around the age of three-and-a-half. While Amy thinks this may be the result of his only-child status, Jack’s imaginary companions mainly arrived when he was playing alone. Research, however, does not seem to support the notion that an imaginary companion is created through need for companionship. In 1998, researchers Ball and Lalonde gathered data from adults about their imaginary companions. It is
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further reading • imaginarycompanions.uoregon.edu – a website for anyone interested in knowing more • Imaginary Companions and the Children Who Create Them (Oxford University Press) by Marjorie Taylor
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PHOTOGRAPH: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM
my invisible friend
interesting to note that while parents viewed the imaginary companion as a friend or an alter ego, the adults reporting on their imaginary companions remembered them as serving a nurturing role. Amy tells of how Jack’s Poppy occasionally voiced opinion on topics ranging from toys, food and decisions in general. This did not happen often, but it does support the theory that the role of an imaginary companion goes beyond companionship and nurture. Taylor supports this idea as she describes how professionals will often use the child’s imaginary companion to help them. She reports about children creating imaginary companions in order to deal with difficult situations. The imaginary companion may be called upon to act as spokesperson, to report a scary situation or they may use the imaginary companion to be the scapegoat, reporting perhaps that it is the imaginary companion’s refusal to eat vegetables that is the real issue behind not eating vegetables. Taylor suggests that parents “…can exploit the imaginary for their own communication purposes. If you want to know how your child feels about a sensitive topic, you might try asking about the imaginary companion’s feelings.” She goes on to suggest that it is often easier for children to express difficult things by whispering to an imaginary companion in the presence of an adult rather than talking to the adult directly. Jack’s Poppy was not alone, as one day he invented Sindedode. He was, says Amy, “a kind of side-kick to Poppy.” Sindedode never benefited from the odd family outing as Poppy did and he was only ever mentioned in reference to something Poppy was doing. Taylor reports that having two imaginary companions is not uncommon. “I know of several cases where a child has had two imaginary companions, one good and one bad,” she says, and suggests that using two imaginary companions to deal with desirable and undesirable character traits may be helpful to the child. In addition to imaginary friends brought about through the child’s imagination for mere companionship, some children are also known to create an imaginary companion to deal with deeper emotional trauma. Taylor reports of a child living in poverty creating an imaginary companion who was a rich father and bought her anything she wanted. A child with a missing parent might create an imaginary companion to fill this role and a child living in a violent home might keep an imaginary companion in his back pocket to draw upon when under threat. Around a year after Poppy arrived, Sindedode started to fade away and when Jack started a more formal preschool, Poppy was only mentioned periodically. With a move to a new house, Sindedode and Poppy were left behind. Research around this supports the idea that when a significant change occurs, the imaginary companion is often left behind. A similar thing happened when Bridgette left Cape Town and moved to New Zealand. As the family boarded the plane, her daughter’s constant imaginary companion failed to board the flight and she was never mentioned again. I was surprised then to find that the Ball and Lalonde data gathered from adults revealed that 30% of adult participants were still “in touch” with their imaginary companion. This makes me wonder if resurrecting Gillian from my own childhood to assist in trying adult times might lighten the load of life. *Names have been changed.
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December 2015 / January 2016
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getaway
mamma mia! Travelling in Italy on a limited budget with very little advance planning proved to be a most memorable family holiday for a single mom and her two sons. By KAREN CLAREN
Karen, Lorenzo and Teano at Santa Maria del Fiore Duomo in Florence
Manarola at sunset
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December 2015 / January 2016
Poggio Asciutto farm, near Greve in Tuscany
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PHOTOGRAPHS: KAREN CLAREN
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pontaneously announcing that I was going to travel to Italy with my sons, Teano (11) and Lorenzo (8), for a month evoked reactions of surprise all round, wavering between awe and concern. As I dreamt of escaping the upcoming long school holidays in a wintry Cape Town, opportunity struck when an invitation to visit friends in Tuscany coincided timeously with a business trip to Europe. I extended my plane ticket and booked the children to fly as unaccompanied minors to Italy. And pronto! Our Italian adventure was born. The boys were unfazed by my lack of preparation. They dreamt of four weeks of pizza, pasta, gelato and sunshine while I distilled my overzealous plans into a more child- and budget-friendly itinerary. Incorporating a diversity of iconic Italian culture between coast, city and countryside, we visited Manarola, Venice and Rome, with regional ventures around Tuscany and Reggio Emilia. Our only pre-bookings were a guest house in Manarola, to avoid disappointment, as availability in this quaint seaside village was dwindling fast, and an AirBnB room in Rome, to ensure we had accommodation for our last four nights in case funds ran out, which they predictably did. The rest we improvised.
Piazza Navona, Rome
art appreciation Travelling as a single parent with two children in a foreign language country on a limited budget at short notice required large doses of lateral thinking, tolerance, collaboration and compromise by all three of us. As much as I cursed Wi-Fi and the boys’ impulse to jump on at any given chance, it was indispensable, allowing me to sit up at all hours feverishly researching our next chapter, even booking cars and trains, often just hours before departure. Although they like surprises, I began to appreciate that even on holiday children seek a degree of predictability. So while my boys realised it was futile to ask me where we were staying in three days time, they craved to know where we were off to next. Sometimes I was still figuring that out myself. In those first few days in Florence, I quickly learnt to take a more creative approach when Teano lamented that everything was “just so old”, and Lorenzo quipped that the century-old painted panels by Fra Angelico were a bit “bloody” and “depressing”. By the end of the holiday, after marathon hours
magazine cape town
Wandering the ruins of the Roman Forum
of walking and playing endless treasure hunts, quiz games and reading stories of historical feats and scandals, they had a very different perspective. You’re unavoidably surrounded by art, history and culture in Italy, from the smallest village to the impressive Roman Forum. Even on the 600-year-old Tuscan farm where we stayed, near Greve in Chianti, midway between Florence and Siena. The villa is reputed to have once been the home of Lisa Gherardini (the subject in Leonardo da Vinci’s famous Mona Lisa painting). What a start.
hidden gems Mellowed by an atypical heatwave with daily temperatures hovering at 38˚C to 42˚C, our holiday took a slower pace than anticipated. With sunsets around 9:30pm and darkness only falling at about 11pm, we adopted a Mediterranean rhythm of late starts and long days. With no clocks to watch or schedules to follow, time and place took on another dimension. We spent our days in an idyllic Tuscan setting,
Island of Murano, Venice
swimming and playing endless rounds of cards or board games in between alfresco lunches and dinners with handpicked salads and vegetables, underscored by that eternal, quintessential white noise of Tuscany, the chirping cicadas. Walking the tightrope of tourist and tour guide, I became concerned I was failing in my duties to show the boys the classic sights, galleries and museums. Sometimes my proposals were met with resistance, and unable to reach a compromise on the day’s programme, conflicts were put to a democratic vote. At worst, when I was unable to pull rank, or bribe with gelato, we’d resort to a few rounds of rock-paperscissors to decide the simplest things, like where to eat. In an effort to avoid the hordes of tourists and endless queues, we frequently headed off the beaten track, meeting interesting locals and making our own discoveries in quieter streets or villages. More thrilling than a restored palazzo, the boys loved exploring an abandoned 300-year-old villa, complete with its own
Enjoying our last gelato in Venice
cobweb-covered frescoes and low-flying bats – a perfect Scooby-Doo scene. So while we didn’t mount the Tower of Pisa, we did spend days climbing up and diving off the giant rocky cliffs in the middle of the quaint and colourful Manarola harbour, laughing as we hit the crystal clear warm waters from imposing heights. Seemingly both the youngest and oldest daredevils that day, we almost became tourist attractions ourselves. And although we missed seeing the statue of David up close, we did get a personalised tour watching ParmigianoReggiano cheese making on a small familyrun farm near Salsomaggiore Terme in Parma. To complete the foodie experience, I drove all the way to Modena for an intimate tasting of authentic Balsamic di Modena, where Teano engaged the cellar owner in a surprisingly lengthy Q&A session. Allowing the children to choose outings ensured increased interest and commitment, and no grumblings, no matter how far the walk. A highlight was a time travel into the thirteenth century at the spectacular
December 2015 / January 2016
17
getaway
Exploring the alley ways in Montefioralle, The wishing well in Siena
Festa Medievale, where the boys could roam freely among the fully animated splendour of this famous pageant set in the picturesque, preserved walled town of Monteriggioni.
keep it simple Unexpectedly simple things became novel and fun: like long-distance train travel, singing along to the Italian pop songs on the car radio while missing signposts, interpreting food labels in the supermarket or licking a stamp for the first time when the children mailed a letter at the little post office in the Vatican City. A good sense of humour is essential, especially when things go wrong. Mine
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December 2015 / January 2016
near Greve
was tested when the boys accidently SIMblocked my cellphone trying to access games, crippling us financially for a week, as I was unable to receive online banking verifications. So for a few days, gelato was officially recognised as a meal substitute. You definitely need to keep your wits about you as a single parent travelling solo with children. Episodes like realising we were on the wrong side of the road after much gesticulating and shouting from locals, or protectively delivering a mighty “klap” to a pickpocket I caught red-handed in my purse, were heart-stopping moments for me, but definite highlights for the boys. Thankfully it was a smooth, largely drama-free trip, excluding the excitement
of my stolen phone mysteriously found hours later on a Venice vaporetto, missed trains and newly purchased toy drones whizzing off our third-storey balcony and crashing into a creek. However, on our second-last day in Rome, my worst nightmare almost came true when I discovered that the boys had not alighted from the bus behind me at Piazza Bocca della Verità. Running down the road, chasing a bus in a foreign city not knowing where it was going or when it would stop next, felt surreal. Minutes later the boys emerged from the crowd, unruffled and looking distinctly local, arms around each other laughing: “Oh, Mama, you looked so funny screaming and running behind the bus!” I bet I did. The daily details logged in our travel journals are filled with these funny little moments that will carry more conversational weight in days to come than an imposing statue that will still be there next time. Reflecting on those fabulous moments of playing in hilltop castles, strolling through olive plantations, marvelling in village markets, picnicking beside canals, studying Roman ruins or slowly sipping an expensive drink on a cozy piazza forms a colourful masterpiece that I now stand back to admire as a “truly authentic Italian adventure”.
do… • research the plethora of interesting regional festivals • stay at agriturismos (working farms) • increase your credit card limit if renting a car to cover the hefty deposit hold • enjoy the marvellous Italian trains for longer trips • download walking and tour guide apps or hire audio guides • book in advance for food tours and key museums • buy a local SIM card that offers a generous call and data package • invest in the invaluable DK family travel guides full of fantastic tips
don’t… • forget to pack a snorkel and goggles • travel without a multipurpose tool • miss out on the Festa Medievale in Monteriggioni • overlook all the strict paperwork requirements for children travelling out of South Africa • underestimate the travelling times needed on the little country routes • change your PIN on your phone while abroad
magazine cape town
magazine cape town
December 2015 / January 2016
19
parenting
the only child Children who grow up without siblings are not necessarily at a disadvantage, discovers SIMCHA VAN BEL-DU PLOOY. There is strong
hy is it that just after you have overcome the initial shock of the birth of your first child, everyone starts to ask, “When is the next one coming?” There seems to be an automatic assumption that you will have at least two children. This question of having a second child is enough to choke you with confusion. What do I want to do and what is the “right” thing to do? Is it possible to marry these two questions and come up with an answer? My one decision impacts greatly on the family structure of not only my child’s generation, but the next one as well. Any children she goes on to have will not have an aunty or uncle from her side of the family. Society seems to demand that we have more than one child – at least, this is the feedback I am receiving from those around me. Is it therefore a parent’s sole choice to have a second child or do we do it because it is what is expected of us? The freedom to make this choice, rather than feeling it is a burden placed upon a mother, is ultimately what has given me strength to explore my options further. I felt challenged to oppose the idea that a one-child family is a “not-good-enough” family. When asked, “So when are you having your next child?” I now respond with, “This is it – there are no more.” This is met with a puzzled expression of disbelief and what I perceive as judgement. The response is “that is selfish”, “you can’t do that”, “why?” or “you will change your mind in due course”. In my interactions with other parents and non-parents, not once has somebody responded positively and encouraged me with my decision. Obviously as social human beings we crave acknowledgment and acceptance from those around us, so when we choose to do something that is not accepted and/or necessarily approved of, it can isolate us in a way, both socially and emotionally. As a parent, one fears that an only child will grow up to be maladjusted, spoilt, have social difficulties, and suffer from only-child syndrome as if it is a sickness. In my discussions with parents of only children, and only children themselves living in Cape Town, I realised that there are positive aspects to having and being an only child. A Cape Town speech therapist and mother of one explains that it was a choice and even though both herself and her husband came from a large family, they chose to have just one child. As she works as a therapist her life is filled with children. She loves the freedom that comes with having only one child and “being able to be there for my daughter as much as she needs me” is rewarding. She also reports that parenting an only child is very different. In the triangular family structure, the child becomes a much closer unit with the parents. In a larger family, on the other hand, we can observe a dynamic where an adult group and a children’s group is formed. In such cases, the children have secrets or certain things they share with one another, but not with their parents. They have their own group, in a sense, with special inclusion criteria. This group formation is ultimately very different in a family with an only child, as the child simply has to join the parents’ adult group. This can potentially result in a much closer parent-child unit.
securely attached to both her parents. Her mother didn’t work and spent a lot of time with her. She reports that growing up as an only child did not leave her feeling lonely and she never longed for siblings. She was schooled from an early age and had many friends, so never felt isolated and developed empathy for her peers early on. Having a dog from the age of three also added value to her life as her dog became a constant companion. Father of one, John, believes that one is enough and says “you can’t get it right twice”. He explains that following the birth of their first child, who is now four, they received a lot of support and they are unlikely to be provided with this support a second time. Like Mareli, John’s son has been schooled from a young age and has many pets to share his life with. He sometimes struggles to share his space with his peers when they come to visit and this is something that he is still learning to do, though generally he socialises well.
doing just fine In The Case of the Only Child, Dr Susan Newman discusses how the only-child family has actually become one of the fastest-growing family units in the US. She reports that in England a massive 40% of families are only-child families. Time magazine’s front cover in July 2012 focused on “the only-child myth” and in June 2013, the magazine discussed “The economic reasons for having just one child”. Writing for Time, journalist Lauren Sandler, an only child herself and the parent of an only child, has discussed her choice openly. She admits that her decisions as a parent have been “loaded with anxiety, doubt, judgement and misinformation”. This bucket of anxiety and doubt is one I share closely with her. In her article she notes that only children are “just fine”, and not necessarily “selfish, spoilt and lonely” as once perceived. Dr Tony Falbo of Texas University and her colleague Denise Polit have conducted extensive research to challenge the idea that siblings are necessary for well-adjusted
40% of families in the UK are only-child families
PHOTOGRAPHS: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM
w
evidence to suggest that they can be quite well-adjusted individuals.
one and only Mareli Fischer, a Cape Town-based clinical psychologist and only child herself, explains that the empty nest (when children leave their parents’ home to become independent) can sometimes be more difficult for parents of an only child. The long-term impacts of the triangle losing one of its sides may be more detrimental to the parents than the child. Mareli reports that, for her, being an only child was a positive experience and she has always felt
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December 2015 / January 2016
magazine cape town
human development. She is an only child herself and the mother of one. Falbo has studied only children in the US and China since the 1970s. Her findings have shown that children without siblings do not have a greater chance of being maladjusted in personality, achievement or intelligence. The results found that only children often scored higher in measures of self-esteem and achievement. In studies of over 200 personalities of children without siblings, they found no difference in personality to children who grew up with siblings. Falbo also reported that “people reproduce the environment that they grew up in”, suggesting that we choose to have more children because we grew up with siblings and believe that the next generations should do likewise. This is ultimately consistent with the idea that as humans, we find change difficult and conformity to be an easier option. In China, a number of research projects have been carried out to explore the impact of the one-child policy. Feng (2002) reported that only children actually had superior nutrition and health care, as well as what he terms “an overdeveloped intelligence”. Furthermore, Chen (1986) found that 76% of the mothers and 51% of the fathers of only children spent more than half of their leisure time with their children, while only 60% of mothers and 45% of fathers of children with siblings did so. This makes sense, given that when you have more children, the time spent with each one may decrease somewhat. From the research, one may wonder if having an only child may be a better choice. Many people who have been great achievers have been only children, and without them the world we live in today may not have been the same. The list includes Isaac Newton, Elvis Presley, Frank Sinatra, Leonardo Da Vinci, Mahatma Gandhi, Maria Sharapova, Coco Chanel and Charlize Theron. Ultimately, a happy parent equals a happy child. If having a second or third or fourth child will make them feel stressed, unhappy, overwhelmed or financially constrained, then perhaps it is not the best decision. Research also suggests that being an only child is in the best interest of the child – cognitively, emotionally and socially. Still, all the research in the world doesn’t make the decision any easier for parents. It remains one of the most difficult to make.
magazine cape town
Children without siblings do not have a greater chance of being maladjusted in personality, achievement or intelligence.
December 2015 / January 2016
21
my story
When LINDA MARTINDALE offered to baby-sit her sister’s four children for the night, she had no idea just how much drama would unfold.
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December 2015 / January 2016
magazine cape town
PHOTOGRAPH: shutterstock.com
babysitting fiasco
i
closed the front door, breathed deeply and looked around at the chaos, counting the expectant little faces looking up at me. One. Two. Three. Fo… “Where’s Daniel, guys?” “I dunno,” shrugged Justin, who, at seven years old was apparently the next most responsible person in the house. Chad, five, and ever eager to please, said, “Heeth not here,” matter-of-factly before joining his brother at the Lego table. I realised that Kara, three, would be of no help, apart from ensuring I did not rush around trying to find him as she clung to my leg like a monkey. I tried to call both parents’ cellphones. They were off. Not unusual for my sister and her husband, who had rushed out thanks to my tardy arrival. I could not see them for the dust they churned up as they dashed out the door. This was a far cry from an evening a decade earlier. I had arrived for babysitting 30 minutes before they needed to leave and watched my sister explain to under one-year-old Daniel that “Mommy and Daddy are going out, but it is all going to be okay because Aunty Linda is here and she loves you very much too, and we will be back soon and in the meantime you must be good and not be afraid and Mommy is coming back… I promise.” Daniel’s chubby face had slowly turned from one of smiles to a trembling bottom lip and frown as the monologue of imminent departure was delivered. “Just go, Sal, we’ll be fine,” I ventured politely into the growing storm of pending abandonment.
“Yeah, but I just want to make sure he understands that I’m coming back…” She turned to his reddening face and held it in her hands. “Mommy loves you, Daniel.” He started howling – and they dragged themselves out the door as I tried with all my non-mothering might to comfort him as he watched his parents dissolve before his eyes. He survived that night. And so did I. Barely. Ten years and three more children later and I cannot even find their son. “I think heeth at a thcool play,” chirped Chad. That sounded about right, so I took a deep breath and set about the pre-bed preparations. Three out of four were doing okay – that was a 75% success rate. I realised I might make it and was now pretty sure that Daniel was okay, even if he was not in the house or accounted for by his parents. “Go upstairs and brush your teeth and I will come up and tuck you into bed in five minutes, okay?” I had no time to gently settle into the role of babysitter. The slamming of a door and an almighty howling broke through the peaceful banter. I ran up the stairs, two at a time – all thoughts of future pleasant relations with my sister draining away with each step. There was blood. Lots of it! Nausea rose and I felt adrenaline shoot through my veins as I surveyed the scene. Chad was wide-eyed and looked guilty. Justin was holding up his bleeding hand, tonsils tingling. Kara was on the brink of tears and monkey-clinging my leg again as I tried to manoeuvre my way into the eye of the storm.
magazine cape town
“He slammed my finger in the dooooooor,” Justin wailed. “It wath a mithtake,” said Chad with all the integrity he could muster. Blood was dripping down Justin’s arm. I started to feel the dreaded mixture of dizziness and a nervous giggle – both coming on at the same time. When I was a little girl I wanted to be a nurse. I had a nurse’s outfit and dreamt of bringing Nightingale-esque healing to thousands. I think it was my first encounter with the birth of puppies that tore me from that vocational aspiration. Justin’s finger was bleeding profusely from a deep cut that showed some white flesh. I felt lightheaded and did what any 30-something single would do in that situation – I called my mom. Her phone just rang. It never just rings. I called my middle sister, Wendy. With four children herself, she would know what to do. “How deep is the cut?” she asked. “I – erm – don’t know – uh, there is just quite a lot of blood and I am not sure if he needs stitches.” “Have you called Sal and Gav?” “Their phones…” I started “…are off, of course.” She completed my sentence. We are a close family and know each other’s foibles well. “Right… what you need to do is…” and Wendy took charge by phone and I knew we were all going to be okay – maybe. Ten minutes on the phone and Justin had his wound dressed and his tonsils were no longer visible. This was a good sign. The intermittent apologies from a wide-eyed
and repentant Chad formed the soundtrack to my nursing drama endeavours and Kara clung to my leg throughout. It felt like I was in some kind of Aunty Fear Factor and there was a hidden camera somewhere. I gathered my wits and sighed in relief as the atmosphere shifted from guilt, pain and noise to one of peace. Seeing the three of them in their PJs looking cherublike and smiling again, I started to calm down. “You can each choose a story,” I said, “and then it’s bedtime.” And wine time, I thought. Starting with the youngest, we got through Kara’s book with no problems. Then Chad handed over his book with an eager smile. It had a suspicious-looking title: Where did I come from? A quick browse showed some pictures I’d rather forget. I put the book down and said in a measured tone through gritted teeth, “Choose another book, Chad.” “But you thed we could chooth any book?” “Not tonight, Chad, not tonight.” “But Aunty Linda…” “Chaddy-lad – GET – ANOTHER – BOOK…” Something about my tone made it happen – fast. After they were tucked into bed and sleeping, the doorbell rang and there was Daniel, in true tween-like fashion trying to nonchalantly hide his happiness to see me. An hour later Sally and Gavin returned home to find a quiet, peaceful home with a surprisingly frazzled aunty staring bleakly ahead with a glass of wine in her hand. “Thanks sis, we sooooo appreciate it. Was everything alright?”
December 2015 / January 2016
23
parenting
the
naked
truth
You may want to protect your child from skin cancer or potential sexual predators, but does covering them up develop an unhealthy body image? And what level of nudity is appropriate in your home? SAMANTHA PAGE
i
t’s the most natural thing in the world. We come into this world wonderfully and perfectly made – bare of judgment – our primal task being simply to thrive, which is why children are so brilliantly uninhibited. They pick their noses, announce their toilet habits to anyone who’ll listen and often feel inclined to strip off their clothing without batting an eyelid. “Children between the ages of three and five often enjoy being undressed,” says Dr Paula Elbirt, assistant professor of paediatrics at Mount Sinai Hospital, who adds that it’s normal behaviour. “It feels good to them.” But at what age does it become inappropriate, and how do parents curb their exhibitionists without destroying their healthy body awareness? Dr Kyle Pruett, a clinical professor of psychology at Yale Child Study Centre, calls nudity – especially in the home – a “hugely sensitive cultural issue” that varies by country, climate and ethnic background. Elbirt notes, for example, that while Americans are shyer about showing body parts than Europeans, people who live in warmer climes are generally more inclined to allow their children to run around naked on the beach or around the swimming pool. Experts agree that what people regard as appropriate differs from family to family, and while some parents see their child’s
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December 2015 / January 2016
nudity as cute, others are embarrassed and find it inappropriate. Elbirt notes that children start developing awareness of their naked bodies by four years old. CNN.com recently quoted a study conducted by Common Sense Media that reveals not only are children more aware of their bodies at four or five, but that’s the age at which many start developing negative awareness, thinking themselves fat, ugly and undesirable, not necessarily in a sexual sense, but merely as a criterion for acceptance by their peers. So, how can parents set age-appropriate boundaries with regards to nudity and encourage healthy body awareness? “This is a big challenge, as sexualizing of bodies, particularly the female form, is everywhere,” says Fairuz Gaibie, a Cape Town-based clinical psychologist. “Parents should try to focus on the functionality of bodies, such as their strength and speed rather than what they look like, and comment on character, rather than aesthetics; for example, ‘Isn’t that girl kind?’ instead of, ‘Wow, isn’t she a pretty little princess?’ The same can be applied to the way in which we talk about the bodies of boys and girls; for example, ‘Your arms have really gotten strong, haven’t they? I didn’t realise you could carry such heavy bags,’ instead of commenting on the fact that their body looks good in an outfit.” magazine cape town
PHOTOGRAPH: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM
uncovers some perspectives.
As with any aspect of parenting, our children are impressionable and look to their parents to help them form opinions, not just about the world around them, but about themselves. Most parents know that how you talk about your own body and treat your body could negatively impact your children, but many parents interviewed for the Common Sense Media report were surprised that five to eight year olds who think their moms are unhappy with their bodies are more likely to feel dissatisfied with their own.
striped himself in blue paint like a warrior. In the photograph, he’s proudly strutting in front of the camera. That same little boy is now 15 years old. When I came across the picture the other day and showed it to him, he was mildly horrified. ‘What was I DOING?’ he asked. ‘You were just expressing yourself. You were totally at ease with your body, and not at all selfconscious’, I told him. Unlike now, I could have added. I haven’t seen my boy naked in years. He started to get self-conscious well before puberty set in, and I respected his
Most children start feeling uncomfortable naked around their parents and having their parents naked around them from about eight or nine years old. “If you complain to your partner about your unhappiness with your body, or inadvertently deflect a compliment from your child regarding your body with, ‘Oh no, Mommy can’t wear clothes like that anymore!’ you are teaching your child, especially your same-sex child, the attitude they should have towards their body. The best investment you can make in your child’s relationship with their body and sexuality is to work on how you feel about your physical self,” concurs Gaibie.
privacy matters Justine*, a Cape Town mom of a now teenage son, says her boy went from exhibitionist to prude in such a short space of time. “I have a picture of my son, aged about four, standing naked by the swimming pool. He had been painting pictures outside in the garden, and had
need for privacy. We are not a particularly ‘prudish’ family, but as he has become more self-conscious, so have I. It’s all part of growing up and creating that separate identity from your parents.” “The different developmental stages of childhood usually usher in shifts in a child’s attitude to various things, nudity included,” says Gaibie. “Most children start feeling uncomfortable naked around their parents and having their parents naked around them from about eight or nine years old. Parents need to be sensitive to what children are comfortable with and respect their feelings. Moms and dads also need to encourage children to respect their own feelings by voicing what they are and aren’t comfortable with when others, including their parents, do not appear to have noticed.” *Name has been changed.
four steps to cultivating healthy body awareness and keeping children safe By Fairuz Gaibie 1. Safety first Parents are faced with the difficult dilemma of wanting to allow their child freedom while still being mindful of the potential for disturbed individuals observing their children naked on the beach. From a safety perspective, it may be advisable to allow a nude frolic through the sprinklers at home in the backyard, rather than on a public beach. 2. Speak up Children should be taught how special their bodies are and that only certain people should get to see them naked or touch them; for example, Mommy at bath time. You should also let them tell you with whom they are comfortable being naked around. From as early as possible, a child should have a choice over who washes and dresses them, depending on what’s realistic. 3. Comfort zone The most important factor guiding nudity in the home is what makes everyone comfortable. A parent may feel it’s important for their child to grow up with adults displaying comfort with their own nudity, but if your pubescent or adolescent child is not comfortable around your nudity, then respect this. 4. Believe in you Paedophiles test the water with children who have a shaky sense of self and do not have the confidence to set boundaries. A child who has a healthy sense of self, due to a strong attachment with his parents and who is assertive enough to voice their autonomy over their body will be an automatic deterrent to sexual predators.
magazine cape town
December 2015 / January 2016
25
book extract
food for
superheroes
yoghurt and raspberry-ripple ice-cream pots Makes 6 frozen pots
In their book Raising Superheroes, TIM NOAKES, JONNO PROUDFOOT and BRIDGET SURTEES offer delicious recipes to give our children the best nutrition possible.
ingredients • 6 x 100g sugar-free vanilla-flavoured yoghurt (ideally full-cream) • 160g fresh raspberries, blended method Remove the foil from all six yoghurt tubs.
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Blend the raspberries and spoon them into the yoghurt tubs to fill them to the top. Stick a wooden sucker stick into each yoghurt pot and freeze overnight. Remove from the pots and serve.
dippy chippies Makes 4 portions ingredients • ¾ cup almond flour • ¼ cup golden flaxseeds • ¼ cup coconut flour • 30g butter • 1 large egg • ½ tsp paprika • ½ tsp dried thyme • ½ tsp cumin
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4 5 6
Place all the ingredients in the bowl of a food processor and blitz until a dough is formed. Scoop out the dough and divide into two balls. Roll out one of the balls of dough between two sheets of silicone baking paper on a flat surface so that the dough is as thin as you can make it. Lift off the top sheet of paper, and use a pizza cutter or knife to slice the dough into triangles. Try not to cut the paper, though it isn’t a train smash if you do; you can just peel it off after baking. Lift up the sheet of paper and place it on a flat baking tray. Bake for 8–10 minutes until the chips are light brown and crispy. Repeat the process with the second ball of dough.
* Serve with tomato salsa or cream cheese as a dip.
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December 2015 / January 2016
magazine cape town
PHOTOGRAPHS: Toby Murphy / ILLUSTRATIONS: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM
method Preheat the oven to 180°C.
super beef burgers Makes 4 big burgers There are few meals more satisfying than a juicy, delicious, freshly made hamburger – another reason why commercial burger patties should be banned for all eternity. If you have a good relationship with your butcher, order your mince with 20% pork; it’ll just melt in your mouth. ingredients | burger patties • 800g best-quality beef mince • 1 onion, finely chopped • 2 tbsp barbeque spice • 10g chopped parsley • 2 eggs • salt and pepper • 3 tablespoons butter, for frying ingredients | burger • 8 pieces crispy bacon • 4 thick slices of cheddar • 4 pieces of lettuce • 2 tomatoes, sliced • 4 gherkins, sliced • 1 red onion, halved and thinly sliced • homemade mayo and ketchup • a little butter for the rolls • 4 sesame burger buns, halved
method In a bowl, mix together the burger patty ingredients, except the butter, using your hands. Heat a little butter in a frying pan and fry off a teaspoon of the mixture. Taste it for seasoning. Add a little more salt and pepper if necessary. Shape the prepared mince into 4 generous burger patties. Expect them to thicken as they cook, so make them a little thinner than the end size you want. Heat the butter in a frying pan and fry the patties for about 4 minutes per side. Make sure they are dark and golden. Lay the bacon and cheese over each patty and place a lid over the pan for a minute. This will heat the bacon through and melt the cheese. While the patties are cooking, construct your burgers. Start with lettuce, tomato, gherkin and sliced onion, layered with homemade ketchup and mayo. Top the pile with the cheesy beef patty and any other toppings that take your fancy. Finish off with the top of the burger bun, then prepare for burger bliss.
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4
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cool cookies To sweeten them we’ve used, respectively, honey and erythritol, which adds a minty flavour as well.
rosemary and apricot almond cookies ingredients • ½ cup butter • ⅓ cup honey • ½ tsp chopped rosemary • 100g almond flour • 45g coconut flour • 1 tsp bicarbonate of soda • 50g dried apricots, chopped • a pinch of salt method Preheat the oven to 180°C.
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In a small saucepan, gently melt together the honey and butter. Take off the heat and add the rosemary.
minty dark chocolatechip cookies
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In a bowl, mix together the flours, bicarbonate of soda, dried apricots and salt. Pour in the melted butter mixture and mix very well. Cover the dough and place in the refrigerator for at least 10 minutes for the coconut flour to absorb any excess liquid. Cover a baking tray with silicone baking paper and spoon the dough onto it in mounds. Be sure to leave space between each mound for the cookies to spread. Use about 2 tablespoons of dough for each cookie. Bake the cookies for about 12 minutes, until golden brown. Allow to cool on a rack until they’re firm, then serve.
ingredients • 1½ cups almond flour • ½ cup cocoa • ½ tsp bicarbonate of soda • ½ tsp salt • 1 cup erythritol granules • 115g butter, cubed • 1 tsp vanilla extract • 115g dark chocolate, melted • 2 large eggs • 115g dark chocolate, roughly chopped method Preheat the oven to 180°C.
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magazine cape town
Line a baking tray with silicone baking paper. Place the almond flour, cocoa, bicarbonate of soda, salt and erythritol into the bowl of a food processor and blitz together. Add the butter and vanilla and pulse until it is all combined and the dough looks like breadcrumbs. Add the melted chocolate and eggs and give the mixture another good blitz. Finally, stir in the chopped chocolate. Spoon the dough onto the baking tray, several centimetres apart, and bake for 10–12 minutes. Remove the tray from the oven and allow the cookies to cool completely. Wait for the cookies to set before peeling them off the paper to serve.
about the book Following
the
record-breaking
success of The Real Meal Revolution, Tim Noakes and the Real Meal Team have now set out to rethink the way we feed our children. The result, Raising Superheroes (published by the Real Meal Revolution) by Tim Noakes, Jonno Proudfoot and Bridget Surtees, is not a Banting cookbook and it doesn’t offer no-carb eating for children. But it does challenge ingrained dietary beliefs, advocating a low-sugar, low-refined-carb food lifestyle. The delicious recipes in Raising Superheroes give our children the best nutrition possible. Available from all good bookstores for R330.
December 2015 / January 2016
27
education
LUCILLE KEMP gets you looking to the many days ahead this holiday and avoiding tipping the scale from
i
fired-up fun
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December 2015 / January 2016
t’s holiday time and important to let your child have the downtime they didn’t get during the school year. In fact, letting them get bored comes highly recommended by educational psychologist Melissa Braithwaite as this often leads to fantasy play. However, when that gets old, there are some other ways to fuel their free time.
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Plan a day trip once a week, whether it’s to a petting farm or to a park for a picnic. Your child’s mind will be abuzz with the stimuli that a new experience or environment offers.
magazine cape town
PHOTOGRAPHS RIGHT: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM LEFT: RIAAN VERMEULEN
relaxed to bone idle.
2
8
Join a library. Consider that from this time forward they need never be bored again. A story reveals a new world to your child and a library makes these worlds accessible.
3
Cook and bake together, and give them a say in what they would like to make. This will call for planning and prepping skills, measurement and accuracy, conceptual skills and seeing a task through.
Spend time out in the garden by looking closely at a flower or tree and drawing it. This encourages visual motor integration.
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Get the plans out and build a model airplane together, which is a visual motor activity; for younger children you could build Lego or puzzles.
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Plan and plant a food garden together. Part of the process will be deciding on the kind of vegetables or herbs that would thrive best in the allotted space and season. This project will require a vested interest, research and application skills.
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Budget the pocket money. Get them thinking about what they have to spend, how they’ll make it last and how they can make more. Children will develop numeracy concepts in a concrete way.
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Keep a holiday diary or start a blog and send postcards. This will develop recall and writing skills and exercise their ability to summarise along with developing language and technical skills.
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Sign up with a holiday club. These are great, as many are built around special interests and are structured. They are almost always rigorously balanced to be fun and challenging.
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Make a comic book. This employs many artistic skills, including drawing, colouring and creative writing, deciding on the storyline and sticking to it through words and pictures.
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Make a ritual of reading together every evening before bed, extending the material from Roald Dahl to newspaper articles. This will activate their imagination, get them enquiring and encourage them to start finding meaning in text.
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Make a tented camp in the garden from old sheets. This engages them in fantasy play, and builds perceptual and planning skills.
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Play board games – make your child the banker for the next game of Monopoly.
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Diarise family daytrips, playdates, birthdays, the final countdown to Christmas (if you celebrate) and the first day of school on a large calendar. This will become a conversation piece and encourage children to plan ahead (“I only have 10 days to decide what to buy for Dad’s birthday”) and reflect (“What do I want for Christmas?”).
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resource
back to
school
Whether your child is starting crèche, primary school or high school, CHILD MAGAZINE’s action
checkups
Teeth Visit the dentist when your child is four or five years old, with regular checkups every six months. Eyes Get eyes checked when children are between three and five years old, and when they start school. If children have vision problems, eyes should be checked every year or as prescribed. Otherwise, get a checkup every two years. Worms Deworm children every six months, starting just before they go back to school.
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Vaccines Immunisations should be up to date. Check which vaccinations are needed, most being required before children are 18 months old, with boosters needed at six and 12 years old. If any are required, or have been missed, visit a family clinic as soon as possible. Medication If your child needs to take any medicine to school, check what the school’s policy is on dispensing medicine.
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PHOTOGRAPHS AND ILLUSTRATIONS: shutterstock.com
plan will have them primed for the new year.
making the call If you’re considering getting your child a cellphone, first find out the school’s policy. Younger children are probably not allowed phones, while older children will be asked to turn off phones during the day. Your child should be mature enough to use a phone responsibly.
look the part
bag it and tag it
Hair Book a haircut for your child just before school starts. Girls may not need a haircut, but if they’re starting primary or high school, they’ll need hair bands and clips in regulation colours. Uniforms Shirts, skirts, trousers and shorts can be purchased in a bigger size, so they last longer. Get at least three of everything. Shoes are best bought just before school starts. Don’t forget about swimming gear, PE kits, blazers, jerseys, rain jackets, hats, and socks or tights. Just make sure your child needs all of this, especially if they’re starting a new school or phase.
Look for a big, sturdy bag that won’t strain your child’s back. You’ll also need a sports or PE bag, and possibly a library bag. Use your stationery list to shop around for the best prices on pens, books and other equipment, or order online. Also get supplies for covering books. You can even pack a few extras, like tissues and sunscreen. Look for soft lunchboxes that are easier and lighter to carry. Stock up on plastic tubs, which you can use for sandwiches, fruit and snacks. Get a few juice bottles as well. Labels Whether you use a marker, or sewon, iron-on or stick-on labels, put your child’s name on everything that goes to school, including shoes. And make sure labels are waterproof and non-fading. With so many other children using the same clothes, bags and stationery, items are sure to go missing.
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lift club Teach your children the do’s and don’ts of using alternative transport. Explain that they need to respect the driver and adhere to her rules, which should include wearing a seatbelt at all times, not standing when the vehicle is moving, not placing any part of their body outside the windows, not eating or drinking in the vehicle unless they have the driver’s permission, and not fighting with other children. Meet the driver beforehand. This will help your children feel more at ease and ensure they don’t accept lifts from strangers. Show your children what the vehicle looks like and check that it’s safe. Does it have seatbelts and toddler/baby car seats or will you need to supply one?
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no false starts Establish a bed time Be firm and get into it in the holidays. Get prepared the night before School uniform laid out; lunch and school bag packed; remember PE kit and equipment needed on certain days; sign any paperwork for the school. Get up early Think reasonably about how much time you need to get ready in the morning and then add on extra time. Plan breakfast Narrow down the options available to your child and have it ready to go. Eat breakfast before washing, dressing and brushing teeth. Getting dressed For toddlers and preschoolers, limit the choice of outfits to choose from. For your early grader, if you have the time, let them try tying their own shoelaces and buttoning up shirts while you simply supervise. More on routines Ask your toddler’s soon-tobe crèche for a copy of its daily schedule and try to follow their lunch, play and nap times to help your toddler adjust better when daycare starts. With your primary and high schooler, discuss the expectation of teachers to do more with their time and therefore the importance of getting into a daily revision ritual.
All children should have good manners.
school skills Practise everyday activities to help make the school day a little easier. For crèche, your child should: • Learn your phone number and address by heart. • Know how to put on their own shoes (tie shoelaces or use the Velcro strap). • Know how to use the zips, clips and buttons on their bag so they can open and close it if necessary. • Use their water/juice bottle. • Be potty trained, if necessary – ensure your child feels comfortable with putting up their hand to use the bathroom. All children should: • Have good manners – greeting elders, saying please and thank you, waiting their turn, sharing with other children. • Keep track of their things – you want your children to be responsible and come home with all their possessions.
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making music If your child is taking music lessons, purchase or hire the necessary instruments or arrange to have access to instruments either at home or outside of school. Check that instruments are tuned and ready for action. If you use an electronic tuner make sure you have batteries and necessary spare parts. Do you need to buy sheet music? They might need to take sheet music to lessons. If necessary, buy a case to transport the instrument.
All children should keep track of their things. school’s out; where to now? Here are some options: • Arrange flexitime with your boss and work remotely in the afternoons. • Hire a childminder or enrol your child in aftercare, either at or outside your school. • Hire the services of a lift club or organise a carpool with other parents to shunt the children home. • Discuss extracurricular activities that your child may want to do, which will keep them occupied on certain days until you can get to them. • Rely on family. Willing and able grandparents are a huge help. Questions you should consider when vetting aftercare facilities: Do they offer transport from your child’s school to the aftercare premises? Do they split the children into age groups? What is the child/teacher ratio? Do they offer lunch/snacks? If not, do they have kitchen facilities available to prepare packed food? Do they offer homework assistance? Do they offer holiday care?
school-life game plan Create and hang a large white board calendar for all school/extracurricular/playdate activities or other commitments. It’s helpful having a calendar with a month view at a time. Have a section running down the side of the board for “important to remember” points. Have a pin board or magnetic board nearby for all important notices sent from school. Make the calendar colour-coded (for each child or activity) and try making it visual for children who can’t read yet.
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books
Bible Stories for Children By Wendy Maartens and Marie Prinsloo
a good
read
(Published by Struik Children, R150) This is a retelling of stories from both the Old and New Testament. The combination of the author’s accessible text and the joyful illustrations gives children a modern and open-minded insight into the facts and questions of the Christian faith.
First Sticker Story Fun: Baby Animals By Miriam Bos (Published by Campbell Books, R141) Join Molly Mouse and her googly-eyed friends on a fun-filled adventure around the farm in search of her nest. With loads of stickers and lots of colouring fun too, this book is the perfect sticker activity book to keep little ones busy over the holidays.
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Cinderella By Harriet Castor and Smiljana Coh (Published by Penguin South Africa, R190) In her ragged clothes, poor Cinderella can only dream of royal balls and charming princes. But, with a little help from a fairy godmother, she shall go to the ball and meet her true love. Join in the fun by spinning the wheel to turn a pumkin into a glittering coach, open the flaps to find out about the balls and finally enjoy the wonderful pop-up happy ending.
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Dragons at Crumbling Castle By Terry Pratchett (Published by Doubleday, R129) Dragons have invaded Crumbling Castle, and all of King Arthur’s knights are either on holiday or visiting their grannies. It’s a disaster. This book includes 14 brilliant stories from the master storyteller, full of time travel, tortoises, monsters and mayhem.
Russell Brand’s Trickster Tales: The Pied Piper of Hamelin By Russell Brand and Chris Riddell (Published by Canongate Books Ltd, R310) The comedian, actor, and bestselling author delivers a hilarious retelling of an old fairytale favourite that will appeal to adults and children alike.
Strange but True Senior Editor: Victoria Pyke (Published by Dorling Kindersley, R285) This book is ideal for those curious young minds who are fascinated by our weird and wonderful world. Stuffed full of strange animals, peculiar weather and odd places, the book unravels all these astonishing strange phenomena, through artwork, jaw-dropping illustrations and clear scientific explanations.
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Guinness World Records 2016 Editor in chief: Craig Glenday (Published by Guinness World Records, R299) This is the latest, fully updated edition of the world’s bestselling annual book. This edition provides a snapshot of the past year in record-breaking, plus a selection of classic superlatives from their archives. The pages are packed with all-new illustrations and hundreds of photos. Find out where the highest concentration of lightning occurs, what the largest bat looks like, who solved the most Rubik’s cubes under water, who climbed the most consecutive stairs on his head, and why Taylor Swift made it onto page 184.
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calendar
what’s on in december and january
You can also access the calendar online at
childmag.co.za
Your guide for what to do, where to go and who to see. Compiled by LUCILLE KEMP
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special events
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FUN for children
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only for parents
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bump, baby & tot in tow
46
how to help
46
SPECIAL EVENTS – p38
FUN FOR CHILDREN – p40
The Galileo family cinema There are some family movies not to be missed during the Galileo season.
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ONLY FOR PARENTS – p46
bump, baby & tot in tow – p46
how to help – p46
Val de Vie Sunday polo brunch Start the day with Val de Vie’s brunch and polo matches, which start at 10am.
La Leche League Breast-feeding Support Group meetings These help mothers worldwide with breastfeeding through mother-to-mother support, encouragement, information and education.
Toys R Us Gift of Play Customers are encouraged to buy a present for a child from a charity selected by the store.
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PHOTOGRAPHS: SHUTTERSTOCK.COM SHUTTERSTOCK.COM/ ANDREW ECCLES
Scooby-Doo Live! Musical Mysteries The much-loved Scooby-Doo and the Mystery Inc Gang take centre stage in a family musical.
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calendar
SPECIAL EVENTS
Scooby-Doo Live! Musical Mysteries The much-loved Scooby-Doo and the Mystery Inc Gang take centre stage in a
december 2015
family musical. In this exciting new production, Scooby-Doo and the Mystery Inc Gang have been called upon to help solve an epic mystery. A trouble-making ghost is haunting a local theatre and Shaggy, Fred, Daphne, Velma and Scooby-Doo are
1 tuesday Community Chest Twilight Festival More than 15 000 active citizens run, walk or skateboard for the Community Chest to purchase school bags, shoes, stationery starter kits or other materials to ensure learners are properly equipped to start the school year. Jimmy Nevis entertains after the run. Time: 6:30pm. Venue: starts in front of City Hall, weaves along landmark streets such as Long, Adderley and Strand, through the Company’s Garden, and finishes on the historic Grand Parade. Cost: R70 entry. For more info: comchest.org.za
1 December – Community Chest Twilight Festival
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on their way in the Mystery Machine to crack the case. Ends 13 December. Time: 10am Saturday and Sunday; 1:30pm Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Venue: Grand Arena, Grand West Casino and Entertainment World. Cost: R120–R290. Book through computicket.com 5 December – Wildebraam Berry Festival
5 saturday The Franschhoek Cap Classique and Champagne Festival This year’s theme is black and white with a touch of bling. Relax in the grand marquee and taste some of South Africa’s finest Méthode Cap Classique (MCC) wines and some of the best French Champagne, along with dishes from some of Franschhoek’s finest restaurants. Also 6 December. Time: 12pm–5pm. Venue: Huguenot Monument. Cost: R200; under 18 free. Book through webtickets.co.za Wildebraam Berry Festival Pick your own berries or purchase prepicked, fresh or frozen. For the children there is entertainment, berry picking, tractor rides, pony rides, a toddler quad train, jumping castles, face painting and a supervised children’s area. You can enjoy live music, and the variety of food, produce and
11 fri
crafts on sale. Time: 9am–4pm. Venue: Wildebraam Berry Estate, Swellendam. Cost: adults R15 and children R10. Contact: 082 380 2080 or info@wildebraam.co.za
6 sunday St Luke’s Hospice Tree of Lights Ceremony Join the hospice as they celebrate life and light up their five-storey Norfolk Pine Tree in memory of loved ones. Join them for carols by candlelight, led by
Westcott Primary School. Take your own picnic or purchase refreshments from the stalls. Time: 6pm–9pm. Venue: St Luke’s Hospice, Kenilworth. Cost: free; donations welcome. Contact: 021 797 5335 or melissaz@stlukes.co.za The Kirstenbosch Summer Sunset December Concerts On 6 December: Arno Carstens, 13 December: Mango Groove, 17–20 December: Christmas Carols, 27 December: Jimmy Nevis and
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National Botanic Garden. Cost: adults from R110 and 6–21 year olds from R80. Book through webtickets.co.za
31 December: Jeremy Loops and Grassy Spark. Time: 4pm. Venue: Kirstenbosch National Botanic Garden. Cost: adults from R110 and 6–21 year olds from R80. Book through webtickets.co.za
5 tuesday Humpty Dumpty and Friends Everyone’s favourite nursery rhymes – Humpty Dumpty, Hey Diddle Diddle The Cat and The Fiddle, Old MacDonald had a Farm and Jack and Jill come alive in this Cape Town City Ballet production. For children from 4 years old. Ends 8 January. Time: 11am on 6–8 January; 2pm on 5 and 7 January. Venue: Artscape Theatre. Cost: R100. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or Artscape Dial-a-Seat: 021 421 7695
12 saturday Holiday Event with Wild Magazine Take part in an interactive snake and reptile experience where you can touch, see and hear the animals, and then stay afterwards to tackle the in-store climbing wall. Booking essential. Time: snake and reptile show 10am–11am, climbing wall 11am–12pm. Venue: Cape Union Mart, Canal Walk Adventure Centre. Cost: free. Contact: wildevents@sanparks.org (specify Cape Town in the subject line)or capeunionmart.co.za/events
23 saturday Delheim start of harvest celebration The day includes a grape-stomping competition and relaxed, alfresco dining at the Harvest Table. The harvest high-jinks start at noon, on both days, when guests are greeted with a glass of fermenting grape must and a sweet mosbolletjie, a traditional harvest treat, to toast the new vintage. Grapes harvested on the day are out for sampling too. Also 24 January. Time: 12pm. Venue: Delheim Wine Estate. Cost: R300 per person or R175 for children under 12 and children under 2 are free. Contact: 021 888 4607, 079 735 3257 or restaurant@delheim.com
15 tuesday The Nutcracker The magic unfolds as the beloved characters Clara, Fritz, the Mouse King and Sugar Plum Fairy come alive against the backdrop of Tchaikovsky’s magnificent music as well as breathtaking sets and fairytale costumes. After the show on 24 December there is a Fairy Parade. Ends 24 December. Time: 2pm on 16, 19, 23 and 24 December; 3pm on 20 December; 7:45pm on 15–19, 22 and 23 December. Venue: Artscape Theatre. Cost: R120–R160. Book through Computicket: 0861 915 8000 or Artscape Dial-a-Seat: 021 421 7695
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15 December – The Nutcracker
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january 2016 3 sunday The Kirstenbosch Summer Sunset January Concerts On 3 January: The Parlotones, 10 January: Prime Circle, 17 January: Karen Zoid and Francois van Coke, 24 January: Mi Casa and 31 January: The Soil. Time: 4pm. Venue: Kirstenbosch
Soil for Life open garden
sat
Discover how Soil for Life is changing lives in the communities of Cape Town. The tea room sells homemade cakes and coffee. Time: 9am–3pm. Venue: Soil for Life, Constantia. Cost: R10 per person. Contact: 021 794 4982, info@soilforlife.co.za or soilforlife.co.za
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calendar Riesling and Rarities Rock Festival This summer event features superb wines, delicious deli fare and live entertainment. Hartenberg’s indulgent picnic baskets can be prebooked. Time: 12pm–5pm. Venue: Hartenberg Estate. Cost: R150. For bookings: webtickets.co.za
FUN FOR CHILDREN art, culture and science Eat Paint Love Festival Art Mode hosts an impressive line-up of artists performing live. From scores to sculptures, this is a new summer festival that celebrates all facets of art. 12 December. Time: 6pm. Venue: The Palms, 145 Sir Lowry Rd, Woodstock. Cost: R60 at the door; R40 presold tickets. For more info: artmode.co.za Free two-hour introductory fabric painting workshop These workshops are designed for adults and children. 23 January. December holiday classes for children and adults take place 1–15 December. Time: 8:45am–10:45am. Venue: Pinelands. Cost: R40 per kit. Contact: 021 531 8076, 082 391 4954 or wendyadriaan@telkomsa.net Sue Nepgen’s children’s art classes Classes take place during the term on Wednesday, Thursday or Friday afternoons; also Saturday mornings. Term starts 20 January. Children may join in at any stage. For 4–13 year olds. Time: held in the afternoons and Saturday morning. Venues: 28 Klaasenbosch Dr, Constantia or Michael Oak Waldorf School, Kenilworth. Cost: R730 per term, including materials and firing. Contact: 021 794 6609, 083 237 7242 or snepgen@xsinet.co.za
Summertide Art Exhibition
6
sun
Visitors are treated to a fresh, contemporary mix of landscapes, still-life painting, portraits and figure studies in the form of oil and acrylic paintings, charcoal drawings and sculptures. Highlight exhibitors include Solly Smook, Di Johnston Ackerman and Susan Proctor Hume, and up-andcoming artists include Mind Shana and Winston X. 6 December 2015– 31 January 2016. Time: 9am–5pm. Venue: The Gallery, Riebeek Kasteel. Cost: free entry. Contact: astridmcleod@mweb.co.za
Italian course Let your child learn a beautiful language in a relaxed, fun environment. For 7–12 year olds. Time: 4:30pm–5:30pm every Thursday. Venue: 137 Hatfield St, Gardens. Cost: R600 per term. Contact: 021 465 8261, info@ ladante.co.za or ladante.co.za
family outings
Sue Nepgen’s children’s art classes
classes, talks and workshops High school study skills workshops Equip your teenagers with the necessary skills to achieve in high school and further studies. Parent workshops on managing teenage academic progress are also offered. For Grade 8 to tertiary level. 6–12 January. Time: 9am–1pm daily. Venue: 9 Firfield Rd, Plumstead. Cost: R1 200. Contact: 021 762 1355, 083 417 1271 or sharonaitken@ telkomsa.net Intensive swimming lessons Children can build their confidence while learning about water safety and improving stroke techniques through five consecutive one-on-one lessons. For ages 3 years old and up. 30 November–11 December. Time: 1:30pm–6:30pm. Venue: Laughing Waters Swim School, Milnerton Ridge. Cost: R425 per set of five lessons. Contact: 083 458 5897 or laughingwaters@ yahoo.com
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Christmas party at The Kids Shack Children can meet Father Christmas and get a digital photo with him as well as a party box, and enjoy playtime. Take a gift for your child and one for an underprivileged child. 9 December. Time: 3pm–5pm. Venue: The Kids Shack, Wynberg. Cost: R80. Contact: 083 380 9951, thekidsshack@cre8tivekids. co.za or thekidsshack.co.za Pringle House Eco School Trashion Show The evening consists of a threecourse meal, an auction of the recycled
30 November–11 December – Intensive swimming lessons
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art the children have made and a fashion show with the clothes children have made out of recycled goods. 4 December. Time: 7pm. Venue: Community Centre, Pringle Bay. Cost: R100 per adult; R40 per child. Contact: 072 627 1313, 083 657 8828 or 083 796 5842
finding nature and outdoor play African croc dive Over December and January see Africa’s Nile crocodiles from a cage. Children 9–12 years old can only dive when accompanied by a parent. For 9 years and older. Time 9:45am–4pm. Venue: Le Bonheur Crocodile Farm, Simondium. Cost: price on enquiry. Contact: 021 863 1142 or info@lebonheurcrocfarm.co.za Cherry picking in Ceres Klondyke Cherry Farm is open daily in December, except Christmas Day. Picnic or braai and pick your own cherries. Time: 8:30am–4:30pm. Venue: Klondyke Cherry farm near Ceres; visit their website for directions. Cost: R20, children under 6 years old free. Contact: 087 550 0232 or cherryfarm.co.za Junior historian workshop and historical hunt The event includes a short, easy walk and focuses on the history of the area, agriculture and various pioneer personalities. Participants have to identify a nearby historical site using a photographic clue. 29 January. Time: 2:30pm–4:30pm. Venue: Tokai. Cost: adults R30 and children R20. Contact: 079 391 2105 or awhaleofaheritageroute@gmail.com Two Oceans Aquarium They are extending their opening hours. 21 December–8 January. Time: 9am–8pm. Venue: Dock Rd, V&A Waterfront. Cost: varies. For more info: aquarium.co.za
holiday activities Alas Fun House holiday programme Day one: art and crafts. Day two: music. Day three: drama. For 8–16 year olds. 14, 15 and 17 December. Time 10am–2pm. Venue: Alas Academy, Fish Hoek. Cost: R350 for all three days. Contact: 021 782 6552, 084 244 5476, alasacademy@gmail. com or alasacademy.co.za Bright Star Creations holiday art programme One-hour classes in drawing and painting. For 6–12 year olds. 14–18 December. Time 3pm–5pm. Venue: Viola Rd, West Beach. Cost: R70 for one hour or R140 for two hours. Contact: 072 421 3489, brightstarcape@gmail.com or brightstarcreations.co.za
14–18 December – Bright Star Creations holiday art programme
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24 and 25 December – Father Christmas and his fairies visit Table Mountain
Cooking with Hannah December holiday programme The programme includes making reindeer cupcakes, candy cane cookies and Christmas tree frittatas. On 10 and 17, 11 and 18, 14 and 21, 15 and 22 December. Time: 10am–11:30am. Venue: Camps Bay. Cost: call to enquire. Contact: 082 569 8666 or cookingwithhannah1@gmail.com Cricket School of Excellence holiday clinic Four days of cricketing fun, covering all aspects of the game. For 4–13 year olds. 14–17 December and 6–8 January. Time: 9am–1pm. Venue: Rondebosch Boys High School. Cost: R600. Contact: 0861 123 273, adam@cricketschool.co.za or cricketschool.co.za Deeghuys Christmas Factory Interactive baking fun for children. Booking essential from 2 December. 4–24 December. Time: 10am, 12pm, 2pm and 4pm. Venue: Arena, Tyger Valley Shopping Centre. Cost: R100. Contact: 021 914 1822 or tygervalley.co.za Father Christmas and his fairies visit Table Mountain Fun includes treasure hunts and face painting at the Table Mountain Cableway. For 4–17 year olds. 24 and 25 December. Time: 8:30am–7pm. Venue: Tafelberg Rd. Cost: activities free; cableway tickets are R240 per adult and R115 per child. For more info: tablemountain.net Fencing summer camp For children who have an interest in fencing and/or sword fighting. There is a Historical European Martial Arts (HEMA) all-day workshop for adults and seniors. For 9 years and older. 5–9 January. Time: junior camp (9–12 year olds): starts 4pm, 6 January and ends 2pm, 9 January; senior camp (13–18 year olds): starts 4pm 5 January and ends 2:30pm 9 January; HEMA workshop: 2pm–5:30pm (9 January). Venue: Gordon Haines Camp, Glencairn. Cost: R1 350 (junior camp); R1 680 (senior camp); R80 (HEMA workshop). Contact: 072 194 1926 Grand West Casino and Entertainment World holiday activities Activities include beading, Christmas cookie decorating, art and crafts, magic shows and drumming workshops. Schedules change daily for variety. 10 December–10 January. Time: 12pm–4pm daily. Venue: Cape Village, Grand West Casino and Entertainment World. Cost: free. For more info: suninternational.com/grandwest December 2015 / January 2016
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4 fri
Ice Galaxy – The coolest place in the universe Canal Walk Centre Court is transformed into a galactic icy playground for everyone from tiny tots to daring thrill-seekers. Ends 10 January. Time: 10am–10pm. Venue: Canal Walk Centre Court. Cost: full rider R80, mini rider R60, non-rider R20. Book through computicket.com
Holiday surf camp A two-hour surf lesson, hot chocolate and snacks. For 5–18 years old. 10 and 11, 14–18 and 21–23 December; 5 and 6 and 11–13 January. Time: 9am–12pm. Venue: Surf Emporium, Muizenberg
10 and 11, 14–18 and 21–23 December; 5 and 6 and 11–13 January – Holiday surf camp
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beachfront. Cost: R350–R830, depending on length of camp or R200 per day. Contact: 021 788 8687, info@surfemporium.co.za or surfemporium.co.za Holiday swimming booster clinics For beginners and swimmers wanting to perfect their strokes, dives and tumble turns. Choose from a two-, three-, four- or five-day clinic. For babies–8 years old. 14, 15, 17 and 18 December and 6, 7, 8, 11 and 12 January. Time: from 8am. Venue: 104 Queen Victoria Rd, Claremont. Cost: R160, R240, R300 or R375. Contact: 021 674 7681 or headstartswim@gmail.com Kids Shack school holiday programme A programme of stimulating fun with structured activities and loads of playtime. Half-day is for 3 years old–Grade 7 and full day is only for Grade R–Grade 7. 10, 11 and 14–18 December and 4–8 January. Time:
9am–12:30pm or 9am–4pm. Venue: The Kids Shack, Wynberg. Cost: call to enquire. Contact: 083 380 9951, thekidsshack@ cre8tivekids.co.za or thekidsshack.co.za Kidz Discovery Fun Factory holiday club and TotChef mornings A creative baking and making morning. For 3–10 year olds. Starts 9 December. Time: 9:30am–12:30pm. Cost: R160–R200. Contact: 083 654 2494 and email child’s details to info@kidzdiscovery.co.za Musical holiday stage school The Helen O’Grady Drama Academy’s A Musical in a Week is performed at the Magnet Theatre after a week of dancing, singing and acting workshops. This year’s musical is Hood, a delightful pantomime based on the story of Robin Hood. For
5–18 year olds. 14–19 December. Time: 9am–12pm. Venue: The Athenaeum, Newlands. Cost: R1 000 for the week. Contact: 021 674 7478, info@dramaafrica. com or dramaafrica.com My Space to Create mosaic and craft classes For 6 years and older. 12, 22 and 23 December, and 5, 6 and 9 January. Time: 10am–11am. Venue: Montebello Design Centre, Newlands. Cost: R85 per shape. Contact: 072 250 0045 or myspacetocteatr.co.za Nature’s Treasure Box art workshop Children take part in games, storytelling and an exploratory walk. They then paint and decorate their own treasure box into which they put the items they collect from nature. For 6–9 year olds. 10
10 December – Nature’s Treasure Box art workshop
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December. Time: 9am–1pm. Venue: Gold Fields Environmental Education Centre, Kirstenbosch National Botanical Garden. Cost: R60. Contact: 021 799 8670, 021 799 8822 or sanbi.org.za Ratanga Junction is open 27 November –12 January. Excluding 25 December. Time: 10am–5pm. Venue: Century City. Cost: R181 for individuals above 1,3m; R95 for individuals below 1,3m and R70 for a fun pass. Contact: 0861 200 300 or ratanga.co.za School holiday surfing lessons For 90-minute beginner surfing group lessons for 6–18 year olds. 9 December–12 January. Excluding 25 and 26 December and 1 January. Times: 9am and 11am daily. Venue: Learn 2 Surf, Muizenberg Beach. Cost: R600 per person for three lessons or R250 per lesson. Contact: 083 414 0567, info@learn2surf.co.za or learn2surf.co.za Sea Point Library December holiday programme 10, 14 and 17 December. Time: 11:30am–1pm. Venue: cnr Three Anchor Bay Rd and Main Rd, Sea Point. Cost: free. Contact: 021 430 9360/1 Summer camp: School of Rock Students 11–18 years old with a minimum of one year’s experience take part in the Battle of the Bands. Four groups form and battle the following rock bands: Green Day, Nirvana, Black Sabbath, AC/DC, Metallica, Red Hot Chilli Peppers, KISS and Guns N’ Roses. Each group attends the camp for two days, with a final battle on the last day. 4–7
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January (camps 4 and 5 January or 6 and 7 January; final battle 7 January). Booking by 11 December essential. Time: 9am–2pm daily, final battle 3pm. Venue: School of Rock, 120 Main Rd, Claremont. Cost: R1 400 for camps and final battle. Contact: 021 671 9580 or claremont@schoolofrock.com Sunny Skies holiday care Fun activities with supervised play. Half- or full-day options available. For 2,5–8 year olds. 10–22 December. Time: 7am–6pm. Venue: Sunny Skies, Meadowridge. Cost: until 1pm R60, until 3pm R70 and full day R80. Contact: 021 712 5657 or sunnyskies@mweb.co.za The Kids Cooking Club holiday club For children 3–15 years old. Outdoor play area and cafe available. 7–18 December and 4–8 January. Time: depends on booking. Cost: tbc. Contact: 083 309 8024, thekidscookingclub@gmail.com or Facebook: The Kids Cooking Club
markets Fab Ideas Christmas Gift Fair Featuring gifts, live music, food, entertainment such as paintball and water balls and Christmas carolling. 11–16 December. Times: 9am–7pm Friday–Tuesday and 9am–5pm Wednesday. Venue: Kommetjie. Contact: 082 879 5571, 082 416 3983, info@ fabideas.co.za or fabideas.co.za Gabriëlskloof’s Favourite Things Market Shop for handmade leather bags, stylish alpaca-fibre clothing, earth-friendly linens and designer baby goods, eclectic vintage finds, jewellery, ceramic art and wreaths made from fynbos and indigenous plants. Gabriëlskloof’s restaurant becomes a pop-up on the day. 11 and 12 December. Time: 5pm–9pm Friday and 11am–9pm Saturday. Cost: free entry. Contact: 028 284 9865, nicolene@gabrielskloof.co.za or gabrielskloof.co.za
Pop-up Tales
11 fri
Interactive, improvised storytelling for children who get to decide the “who, what, where” of the story. 11, 12, 14, 15 and 16 December. Time: 11:30am and 2pm. Venue: The Galloway Theatre, V&A Waterfront. Cost: R80 each; for bookings of five or more R70 each. Contact Sharon: 082 772 8867 or waterfronttheatreschool. co.za/booknow
Kloovenburg Christmas Market Day Buy stocking fillers, presents, quality cured meats, pizzas, imported cheeses, waffles, biscuits and cupcakes. There is also a selection of local metal works, jewellery and Kloovenburg’s festive season hampers. 5 December. Time: 9:30am–3pm. Venue: Kloovenburg Wine and Olive Estate, Riebeek Kasteel. Cost: varies. Contact: 022 448 1635, info@kloovenburg.com or kloovenburg.com Twilight Gift Market Mingle and enjoy good food while browsing great Christmas gifts and ideas. There are children’s activities and live music. 4 December. Time: 5pm–9:30pm. Venue: St Stephens Church, Claremont. Cost: free entry. Contact: shirley@ststephens.org.za
on stage and screen Bangalory’s Back This charming and delightful show is ideally suited for children 5–12 years old. Enjoy fun storymaking, music, comedy, puppetry and tale-telling, with silly limericks, riddles, guessing games, dot-to-dots, jigsaw puzzles and sing-alongs. 9 December– 9 January. Time: 10am and 12pm, Tuesday–Saturday. Venue: Baxter Golden Arrow Studio, Main Rd, Rondebosch. Cost: R75. Book through computicket.com Early Years Theatre Festival Ekhaya for 3–7 year olds explores a child’s understanding of being “at home” with original songs, music and visual
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The Galileo open-air family cinema
images performed in English, Afrikaans and isiXhosa. Knock! for 3–7 year olds is a discovery of wood. Scoop: kitchen play for moms and babies is for 2 weeks–12 month olds. With the use of sounds, lights and textures, babies are taken on an enchanting journey. 2–12 December. Time: Ekhaya 11:30am daily, Knock! 2:30pm daily, Scoop: kitchen play for moms and babies 10am daily. Venue: Magnet Theatre, unit 1, The Old Match Factory, cnr Lower Main Rd and St Michaels Rd, Observatory. Cost: Ekhaya and Knock!: adults R50, children R30; Scoop: R50 one parent/caregiver plus one baby. Book through webtickets.co.za or contact: 021 448 3436 or earlyyears@ magnettheatre.co.za Frozen Fever This spin-off from the Disney movie, Frozen, premieres on DStv’s Disney channel 303 on Friday 4 December at 6:25pm. For more info: dstv.co.za
10–18 December – The Elves and the Shoemaker
Puppet show: The Little Red Riding Hood A travelling puppet theatre with puppeteers from the Rainbow Puppet Theatre for 4–9 year olds. 14 December. Time: 11am. Venue: Claremont Library, Wilderness Rd. Cost:
free. Contact: 021 673 2064 or claremont. library@capetown.gov.za School of Rock presents: British Invasion This season show sees the students perform songs by The Kinks, the Rolling Stones, the Beatles, Black Sabbath, The Who and Amy Winehouse. 5 December. Time: 1:30pm; doors open 12:30pm. Venue: Barnyard Theatre Willowbridge, Bellville Park. Cost: R120. To book: 021 671 9580 or claremont@schoolofrock.com Swan Lake on Ice The Imperial Ice Stars returns with a new interpretation of the award-winning masterpiece. It is performed in the intimate setting of a frozen theatre stage to Tchaikovsky’s famous and well-loved score. The show features exhilarating new choreography and some of the world’s most stylish dancing on ice. Pyrotechnic effects add drama and mystery to the theatrical experience. 14–31 January. Time: 7:30pm Tuesday–Friday, 2:30pm and 7:30pm Saturday, 2pm and 6pm Sunday. Venue: Artscape Opera House, Foreshore. Cost: R100–R400. Book through computicket.com The Elves and the Shoemaker After each show the audience can meet Father Christmas, who will be handing out sweets to all the children. Parents are asked to please take a present or a secondhand toy for an underprivileged child. 10–18 December. Time: 10am. Venue: Nassau Theatre Centre (Groote Schuur High School). Cost: R60 per person. Book through computicket.com The Fun Factory at V&A Waterfront See the amazing acrobats, jugglers and more from the Zip Zap Circus. 14–20 December. Time: 4pm–5pm. Venue: V&A Amphitheatre. Cost: free. For more info on the show and other events, as well as the V&A Waterfront’s new Kids Ahoy playground: waterfront.co.za.
5 December – Full stride summer trail run
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Tumble Bears Make and Play indoor play centre
The Galileo open-air family cinema On 15 December: The Lion King at Hillcrest Quarry, 16 December: E.T. at Kirstenbosch National Botanical Garden, 22 December: Home Alone at the Hillcrest Quarry, 25 December: Miracle on 34th Street at Meerendal Wine Estate, 30 December: Toy Story at Kirstenbosch, 2 January: Back to the Future at Warwick Wine Estate and 5 January: Finding Nemo at Hillcrest Quarry. Cost: R79 (standard), R87 (plus blanket), R95 (plus backrest), R100 (plus blanket and backrest) or R149 (reserved premium seating, popcorn and sweets, blanket, backrest). For more info: thegalileo.co.za Wabbit on Boomerang premieres 19 December An animated series starring Bugs Bunny, which sets him loose in today’s modern society. Tune in on Saturdays and Sundays at 9:05am on DStv Channel 302. For more info: dstv.co.za
playtime and story time Bounce World A large indoor inflatable play area with a coffee shop, free Wi-Fi and action sports. Time: 9am–5pm during school holidays and public holidays. Venue: 15 Montague Dr, Montague Gardens. Cost: varies. Contact: 021 552 3165 or actioncricket@mweb.co.za Tumble Bears Make and Play indoor play centre December holiday activities are available. Time: 9:30am–4pm Monday– Saturday. Venue: Pick n Pay Centre, Main Rd, Lakeside. Cost: R35 for the first hour or less and R45 for 90 minutes and R60 for two hours, R50 per hour for the drop-and-go service. Contact: info@ thetumblebeargymprogramme.co.za
sport and physical activities Full stride summer trail run 5 December. Time: 6am registration, 15km: 7am, 12,5km: 7:15am, 7,5km: 7:30am and 5km: 7:45am.
Venue: Dirtopia Trail Centre, Delvera Farm, 10km from Stellenbosch. Cost: R80–R125. For more info: dirtopia.co.za Get hooked at Acrobranch Swing from tree to tree using zip lines, Tarzan swings, nets, bridges and other obstacles. For 3 years old and older. Time: 9am–4pm Tuesday–Sunday and public holidays. Venue: 1 Hout Bay Rd, Hout Bay. Cost: varies. Contact: 021 201 1123, bookings@acrobranch.co.za or acrobranch.co.za Kid’s Pilates trial class For 5–12 year olds. 7 December, and 18 and 25 January. Time: 2:45pm–3:15pm. Venue: Healthjunction, Vredehoek. Cost: free for the first class. Contact: 021 461 2159 or info@healthjunction.co.za SUP Series by Surf Emporium Join these sessions to improve your SUP skills in a fun, social way. 3 December and 7 January. Time: 5pm–7pm. Venues: varies between Muizenberg, Hout Bay, Kommetjie or V&A Waterfront; venue to be confirmed on the Monday prior to the session. Cost: free. Contact: 021 788 8687, 082 562 8687, info@ surfemporium.co.za or surfemporium. co.za/events/sup-series/ Teddy Tennis at The Glen Country Club Tennis for children ages 2,5–7,5 years old accompanied by music. Time: Monday–Friday afternoons. Venue: The Glen Country Club, Clifton. For costs and further info, contact: 083 679 0731, mark@ teddytennis.com or teddytennis.com Trail Kids Santa Run An extra-special event with bells, elves and everything else in the Christmas theme to kick-start the festive season. 5 December. Time: dusk run – time to be confirmed. Venue: Lourensford Harvest Market. Cost: tbc. Contact: trailkidssa@gmail.com
Stellenbosch Street Soirees These popular bimonthly street parties are back, offering you a taste of Stellenbosch life through quality wines, delicious bites and live music. 9 December, and 13 and 27 January. Time: 6pm–8pm. Venue: Stellenbosch. Cost: R70, which includes a glass. Contact: 021 886 4310 or wineroute.co.za
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YogaWise
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January. Time: 9am–4pm (two-day course). Venue: Holy Trinity Church, Gardens. Cost: R1 800. Contact: 0861 462 669 or info@ supernannies.co.za
on stage and screen Hope Street – The Musical The musical captures the heart of Cape Town and its people. 9–23 December. Time: 7:30pm Wednesday–Friday, 2:30pm and 6:30pm Saturday, 6:30pm Sunday. Venue: Masque Theatre, Muizenberg. Cost: R120. Contact: 021 788 1898, bookings@masquetheatre. co.za or jungletheatre.co.za
out and about Little Maestros classical concerts
YogaWise Your children will learn the basic postures and concepts of yoga in a fun, supportive environment. For 3–7 and 8–13 year olds. Time: 3:30pm–4pm and 4:15pm–5pm every Thursday. Venue: Atlantic Beach Golf Estate, Melkbosstrand. Cost: R60 per lesson or R1 100 for 6 months (R46 per class). Contact: 072 693 3347 or yogawise.co.za
only for parents classes, talks and workshops Montessori for moms An information session and training to help you work with your infant, toddler and preschool child. 20 and 23 January. Time: 10am–11am. Venue: first floor, 28 Main Rd, Mowbray. Cost: free. Contact: 021 685 8119, elfsecretary@gmail.com or elfmontessori.co.za Sugar and Spice children’s play workshop for nannies Three-hour course to equip your nanny with the skills to engage your child in fun, educational activities. For nannies who care for 1–5 year olds. 8 and 9 December. Time: 9:30am–12:30pm. Venues: Thula Baby Centre, Mouille Point 8 December and Bowwood Baby Clinic, Claremont 9 December. Cost: R450. Contact: 082 743 3076, kim@nannytraining.co.za or nannytraining.co.za Super Nannies training course Give your nanny the confidence and skills to care for your child in the safety of your own home. The course covers childcare, first aid, stimulation and nutrition. 19 and 26
Val de Vie Sunday polo brunch Dress is casual and the polo matches start at 10am. Time: 9am–12pm. Venue: The Polo Club Restaurant, Val de Vie. Cost: free entry. For more info: valdevie.co.za
LGBTI parents’ regular meetings Contact Heather for further details. Venue: Triangle Project, 2nd floor Elta House, 3 Caledonian Rd, Mowbray. Contact: 021 686 1475, health2@triangle.org.za or triangle.org Toughlove SA family support groups Groups assist the family and loved ones of the “problem” person and specialise in behaviour problems often related to addiction. Time and venue: contact Gordon. Cost: they run on a donation basis, but like to ask for an annual fee of R180 and supply a parenting manual for R120, with a weekly donation of R20 per meeting. For group details in your area, contact: 0861 868 445, info@toughlove. org.za or toughlove.org.za
classes, talks and workshops
December 2015 / January 2016
La Leche League Breast-feeding Support Group meetings These groups help mothers worldwide to breast-feed through education, mother-to-mother support, encouragement and information, and to promote a better understanding of breast-feeding as an important element in the healthy development of the baby and mother. Cost: free. For time, venue and other details for a meeting close to you, contact: 082 062 0206, olga@lllsa.org or lllsa.org South African Multiple Birth Association Offers emotional support to parents of multiples. Attend seminars and teas in your area. For venues, dates and times: marionsmith@telkomsa.net or samultiplebirth.co.za
how to help
Moms and Babes Claremont
Wriggle and Rhyme Music Classes These music classes use props, puppets, instruments and movement to inspire and stimulate budding musicians. Classes are an hour long with 30 minutes of musical fun followed by refreshments for the grown-ups. For 6–18 months (Wrigglers) and 18 months–3 years old (Rhymers). Term one starts on 18 January. Time: varies. Venues: Kenilworth, Meadowridge, Fish Hoek and Rondebosch. For bookings and info on holiday programmes: wriggleandrhyme.co.za
playtime and story time
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support groups
support groups
Home birth gathering
Toughlove SA family support groups
your questions answered and your stories heard. There is an opportunity to meet and speak to midwives, doulas and others who have had homebirths or are planning to have them. 17 January. Time: 2pm–4pm. Venue: Muizenberg. Cost: R80 per person or R150 for two. Contact: 078 557 9070, 073 514 9754 or homebirth.org.za HypnoBirthing class An antenatal course focused on natural birth. You learn how the body is designed for birth, how to release fear about birth and more. 13, 20 and 27 January. Time: 6:45pm–9:15pm every Wednesday. Venue: Birth Options, Plumstead. Cost: R1 750 per couple. Contact: 071 334 5627 or catrin@ beautifullyborn.co.za
GAP Playdate Sensory play for babies, toddlers and their carers. On 9 January in Table View and on 14 January in Durbanville. Cost: free. Contact Table View: 083 617 6180 or gapsunningdale@gmail. com and Durbanville: 083 306 2527 or gapdurbanville@playwhizz.co.za Home birth gathering An informal occasion for sharing and being able to have
Little Maestros classical concerts For parents and tots aged 0–7 years old. On 5 and 8 December: Christmas carols and on 12 and 16 January: The Nutcracker. Time 9:30am. Venue: Youngblood Gallery, 70 Bree St. Cost: adults R100, children R20. Contact: bookings@biblioteek.co.za Moms and Babes Claremont A weekly activity programme, developed by an occupational therapist and physiotherapist for babies 2–13 months old. Time: 10am and 3pm Monday–Thursday. Venue: Claremont. Cost: call to enquire. Contact: 082 746 3223 or reesdi@mweb.co.za Playgroup in Italian A fun-filled class for toddlers who learn basic Italian while playing. For 12–36 months old. Time: 10am–11:30am every Friday. Venue: 137 Hatfield St, Gardens. Cost: R760 per eightweek term. Contact: 021 465 8261, info@ ladante.co.za or ladante.co.za
Bakusasa Trust Sponsor a Child The trust is involved in activities, particularly golf, that enrich the lives of impoverished, disadvantaged South African youth. You are asked to sponsor one of these children with R200 a month for one year. For more info: bakusasa.org.za Go Wild for Wildlife The campaign aims to raise funds for the Cape of Good Hope SPCA Wildlife unit whose efforts are aimed at rescuing, rehabilitating and releasing wildlife back into their habitat, as well as educating citizens. The branch is asking the public and some celebrities to go “Wild for Wildlife”. These public figures will not only be daring their followers to donate to this cause but are willing to perform a dare upon certain milestones reached. In order to donate: pipey.co.za. To pledge support or to post a dare for a celebrity online: spca-ct.co.za Toys R Us Gift of Play Customers are encouraged to buy a present for a child from a charity selected by the store in their area. Ends 15 December. Contact: 087 234 8697 or visit select Toys R Us stores
Go Wild for Wildlife
don’t miss out! For a free listing, email your event to capetown@childmag.co.za or fax it to 021 462 2680. Information must be received by 5 January for the February issue, and must include all relevant details. No guarantee can be given that it will be published. To post an event online, visit childmag.co.za
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next month in it’s our back-to-school issue on street 21 january
we look at‌
PHOTOGRAPH: HUGATREEPHOTOGRAPHY.CO.ZA
when to wean onto solids PLUS: wonderful weaning food asking the right questions at school open days what stresses children most about school
plus
fabulous family-friendly things to do in february
Learn, play, explore
choosing the right extramural for your child
To advertise call: (021) 465 6093 or email: ctsales@childmag.co.za | Booking deadline: 5 January | Material deadline: 7 January
family marketplace
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December 2015 / January 2016
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it’s party time For more help planning your child’s party visit
childmag.co.za/ resources/birthday-parties
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December 2015 / January 2016
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December 2015 / January 2016
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finishing touch
desperate measures ANÉL LEWIS resorts to a clandestine yet shrewd solution to her son’s toilet aversion. It involves kittens and shoes.
t
here’s so much that endears my son, Conor, to me. I love that he’s worried about me going running in the early mornings because it’s too dark. “Mom, you can’t run. Your lamp is flat and the other runners will squash you.” I’m touched that he will gently pat my hair while I’m folded over like an origami bird as I’m trying to tie his shoelaces in the morning. And I do look forward to hearing his versions of the songs he’s learnt at school. Refrains of “See-saw, marry the door” always make me smile. But, I really wish my boy – all 25kg of him – would now get with the programme and see the benefits of ditching the nappies. It’s now at the stage when I’m going to have to start buying adult incontinence
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nappies to stem the tide because he’s just too big to wear anything else. I was warned that boys are lazy when it comes to the whole ablution rigmarole. But this is getting ridiculous. It’s been more than three years! I think my frustration has been compounded by the addition of the two kittens to the Lewis household. So now, it’s not just Conor and his errant bowels that I have to contend with. I have two bundles of fur who behave like teenagers at a foam party when they get into their cat litter box. The scullery was so full of wee-drenched sand granules one morning that it looked as if someone had set off an explosion in the Scratch Patch. The low-point came a few weeks ago when I noticed a rather pungent odour
coming from the shoes in my cupboard. It seems the kittens had found a new spot for their morning routine – in my soft, faux leopard-print slippers. I only discovered the source of the smell when I picked up the slippers and realised that the ball in my hand was not a pom-pom. The joy of pottytraining three creatures knows no bounds. I then decided that I could make this whole cat/toddler/toilet triad work for me. All I needed to do was get Conor in on the “eeew” factor when one of the kittens veered from the kitty litter. I snuck a pair of Conor’s shoes into my cupboard and waited. A few days later Conor came to me with his face screwed up in revulsion.
“The kitten has made a mess in my shoe, Mom.” “Disgusting,” I retorted. He nodded his head in agreement as he watched me scrape clean his shoe. Within a few minutes, I felt a tug on my sleeve and heard a small voice saying, “Mom, I need to go to the toilet.” It was as if a choir of angels had burst into song when I heard the loo flush. In fact, I almost ululated. We’re not quite out of nappies yet when it comes to the more demanding loo visits, or at night, but there is light at the end of the tunnel. If only I could say the same for the kittens and my shoes… Anél Lewis now has to scrub her cupboard twice a week while she looks into nappy options for incontinent kittens.
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PHOTOGRAPH: Susie Leblond Photography
Erin, Anél and Conor