The Batter's Box Fall 2011 - 2nd Edition

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Fall 2011 – Issue 2

Make sure you read the “Announcements” for more details on the “Double Pitcher Contest.”

Fall 2011– Pre-Season Issue 2 – About The Batter’s Box 3 – Announcements 4 – Schedule & Standings 5 – Take a Wiff of This/Holey Balls 6 – I’d Hit That/Sons of Pitches 7 - Wiffskey Militia/Wiffle Crush 8 - The Dirt 9 – Social Calendar 10 – Sponsor Bar & Charities 11-13 – Wiffle Ball for Dummies 14 – DOs & DONTs 15 - Pictures

James Salgado & Charm Reyes


Coming Soon To a “Batter’s Box” Near You Every team will be offered a space every edition of the Newsletter to submit something funny... write about their game... whatever...and since we’re doing a newsletter every Tuesday of every week, you have plenty of time to come up with something! If your team doesn’t submit anything, and isn’t in the newsletter, talk to your captain!

Ideas for Team Submissions Then email them to me at backyardsportsclub@gmail.com

When I say, submit something for your team, here are some ideas: • Play by plays of the game • Document the debauchery at the bar - i.e. describing someone’s amazing acting skills hobbling across the bar with a “sprained ankle” just to Ice a teammate. ] • Draw pictures!!!!! • Favorite quotes, poems, song lyrics, movie scripts, YouTube video, or motivational speeches! • Email chains from the morning after . • Funny pictures of you, your team, or something random on the internet • Give your team member awards - drunkest, loudest, person with the least shame, best off the face catch, etc! • Anything. Really. Someone on your team is creative.

Submissions are due EVERY Monday by 7 p.m. ** If you need extra time, email me and just let me know.

backyardsportsclub@gmail.com

Double Pitcher Contests

Backyard Sports Club’s email is backyardsportsclub@gmail.com. I look forward to working with all of you! DISCLAIMER: if you have problems with keeping your language in check, not bashing refs, being overly nasty to other teams, and other no-no’s, the Editor does have the right to not include your write up in the newsletter if the content is deemed inappropriate or out of line. We will try to screen write ups as they are received, will try to let teams know so that they have time to resubmit, but there is no guarantee. The easiest thing to do is to keep it clean, be nice, and remember this is all in good fun.

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Announcements Double Pitcher Contest Logo Design Contest • The team logo with the most "likes" on the Backyard Sports Club Facebook page will win a double pitcher on Wednesday or Thursday. In order to like someone's logo, you have to like Backyard Sports Club Facebook page first! If your team does not have a logo, create one, or contact Kristi Perron from Take a Wiff of This, to create one for you!

Fall 2011 Hampton Wiffle Ball Classic No athletic skills are needed, just the ability to have fun and make a huge smile. Trophies will be awarded to the teams that place first and second, but remember we are all wiffle champions because the money raised goes to The Noblemen. The Noblemen are an amazing local charity that raises money to help local misfortunate children. Come keep it local and be a part of the solution. Sign-ups to play will run until Monday, October 7th, so no napping! You can sign up as an individual, on a team, or an entire team. We will have a meet and greet pre party on Friday, October 21st to say hello to everybody and find out what teams will play each other first. Details will be updated from now until the event, so stay tuned! WHERE: Historic War Memorial Stadium - 1889 W Pembroke Ave, Hampton, VA WHEN: Saturday, October 22nd & Sunday October 23rd TEAM REGISTRATION: $300 INDIVIDUAL REGISTRATION: $30 If you are looking for a team, please send an email to backyardsportsclub@gmail.com and we will try to find a team for you!

Hair Graphics Owner and Master Stylist, Joy Gillenwater from I’d Hit That has been creating avant-garde looks for over 10 years. Educated by some of the leading companies in the salon industry; Vidall Sasson, Bumble & Bumble, Wella and Paul Mitchel, to name a few. She has a acquired a multitude of skills to give clients the exact look they want. Her work is inspired by the love of art and design specializing in texture cuts and creative color techniques. Joy believes that your hair is a very important part of your life, as well as your self-image and personality and looks forward to working with you. Become a friend of Hair Graphics on Facebook to find out what their daily deals are! Print out the coupon to the left for a 15% discount on your first visit to Hair Graphics!

Make sure to go to UNO after the Games Why you ask? Because they are giving each team a FREE pitcher of beer and a FREE Appetizer EVERY week! Since we had a great showing last season with all the teams, Redd, decided to reward us will all these FREEBIES! Not only will you be getting freebies from our sponsor bar, but if over $1000 is purchased between the hours of 6pm-11pm every Thursday, Uno Chicago Grill will donate 20% of sales to our charities. So let’s all get to our Sponsor Bar and DRINK for CHARITY!!!

REMINDER: There is NO smoking at the fields! And please be discreet if you are drinking alcoholic beverages. Coolers and Solo cups are your friends!!! We do not want to lose these fields, so PLEASE respect the rules! Thanks  Please send any requests for “Announcements” to backyardsportsclub@gmail.com

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Sandlot October 5 Schedule 6:30 Games • Wiffle Dat Azz vs. Roscoe’s Chicken N Wiffles – Field 1 • Wiffler’s Mom vs. Flying Wiffles – Field 2 7:30 Games • Wiffler’s Mom vs. Da Bombers – Field 1 • Wiffle Dat Azz vs. Flying Wiffle’s – Field 2

Sandlot Standings Team Name Wiffle Dat Azz Flying Wiffles Chicken N Wiffles Wiffler’s Mom Da Bombers

GP

W

L

T

2 1 2 1 2

2 1 1 0 0

0 0 1 1 2

0 0 0 0 0

Blue Diamond October 6 Schedule 6:30 Games • Sons of Pitches vs. I’d Hit That – Field 1 • Wiffle Crush vs. Take a Wiff of This – Field 2 • Wiffskey Militia vs. Holey Balls in Your Mouth – Field 3 7:30 Games • Take a Wiff of This vs. I’d Hit That – Field 1 • Sons of Pitches vs. Holey Balls in Your Mouth – Field 2

Blue Diamond Standings Team Name Wiffskey Militia Take a Wiff of This I’d Hit That Sons of PItches Holey Balls in Your Mouth Wiffle Crush

GP

W

L

T

2 2 2 2 2 2

2 2 2 0 0 0

0 0 0 2 2 2

0 0 0 0 0 0

Please submit all scores and write ups about your teams to backyardsportsclub@gmail.com

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Take a Wiff of This Take a Wiff vs. Sons of Pitches After playing with this team in the scrimmage games, and seeing that they had some guys AND girls that can CRUSH the ball. It’s pretty much a lock when Caroline Stolle, Ricky Jemiola, or Brian Wurst get up to bat, its going over the fence. This was a close game, the score kept teetering, and both teams were pretty much swinging for the fences, and not going for strategy at all. After forever of not playing, my team brought their A game, hands and bats were there. Congrats to my defending champs! And Sons of Pitches, good game, we’ll see ya’ll again, I’m sure!

Yea!!! We’re gonna take their color from last season AND photobomb their team pic!

Take a Wiff vs. Holey Balls So we meet again! This team took us out of first place last season. Of course I wanted to seek revenge. Field 1 was hard to play on because of the mud, but we pulled through, we just figured hit homeruns so we don’t have to run around the bases, and to cover a certain perimeter in the outfield…luckily their balls were hit into our hands every time…jk! I do want to take a moment to self call though…that was an awesome play I had when Roman Goldshtyen line drived the ball and I made that running catch to get him out! But good job to both teams! - Charm Reyes

Holey Balls in Your Mouth Holey Balls vs. I’d Hit That Who would have thought that my team would use the $10 Minimum Requirement so early?!?! The flu, kids, and injury had my team down to 3 girls. Thanks to Team I'd Hit That, we were able to have Kristen DePinto play with us so we wouldn't forfeit our double header. She ended up bring a great pickup cuz she almost hit a homerun on her first-atbat. Our solid base hits and the wet fields helped us win our first game of the season. Honestly, I'm just glad that we were able play with all of the rain outs.

I really didn’t assist Charm with her HR! That girl’s got skillz to pay the billz!

Holey Balls vs. Take a Wiff We took their shirt color, we took their 1st place ranking from last season, and we wanted hear that we were underrated from them. Yeah...not so much this time. They were hitting homeruns left and right that we got bored and assisted Charm with her second homerun. Can we at least get 1 run from that alley-opp? It'll be another slow start but we'll be back to give you guys a lose later this season. It's a team trend. A slow start, lack of girls showing up, and then a win to knock off Take a Wiff of This on the last game. I like the sound of that. Game good by all. - James Salgado

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I’d Hit That I’d Hit That vs. Holey Balls We had a short game that lasted only 4 innings since Holey Balls In Your Mouth were waiting on girls (hmm… sound familiar, guys?). Out of the kindness of our hearts, and since we've been waiting for our first game of the season forever, I decided to lend out Jen’s sis-in-law vs. not playing. It was great 1/2 game, although our left fielders ("Sticky Fingers" Jim and "Grizzly" Andrew) were swimming in Lake Left Field. “Slip n' Slide" Matt got a bad out after “tripping on a duck” on his way to 1st base on an easy single. We had a good lead in the 3rd inning thanks to "HR Derby" Matt and "I don't know how to hit these inside the fence" Andrew. Holey Balls came back with a strong 4th inning, and thanks to their tactical “Wait it Out” strategy, the game got called for time before we had a chance to finish them off. ;) It was still a lot of dirty, wet fun.

I’d Hit That vs. Wiffle Crush Yep... my old team captain… I had something to prove. It looked like miserable failure in the 1st inning as they just piled in the points with great hitting and good base running. Thanks to some of our amazing teamwork, we stepped up our game on offense and defense. Bobby "I'd rather wear mud than pink" put his all into a lot of diving catches. Ronnie "I catch bullets with my teeth" made some memorable line drive catches that had mouths dropping including his one-handed laser catch. Balls kept flying over the fence like Amnesty Day at Sing Sing Prison during the whole game on both sides of the benches. Andrew "I think I Can" was on a mission to tag Jon’s runner out at home. If he’d kept the ball he would’ve been a little bit successful. Jim "Wiffle Magnet" made a great catch in the outfield, and was so proud of it he didn’t even notice the runners advancing back in the game. And the ref… Well, he enjoyed Katy & me as catchers, apparently. In the end, Ed "My lower back is KILLING me" clinched up our win with a nice walk to home run with runner Joy "I'm late, but hey, I'll make the second game" on 2nd base. Like butter!!! - Becky Wipf

Sons of Pitches Take a Wiff vs. Sons of Pitches Our indoctrination into wiffleball was against the defending champions (thanks Jon) so we expected a battle. And we got one. Much like a heavyweight boxing match, it was a whole lot of haymakers and not a lot of defense. The lead changed hands three or four times but in the end, the champs would leave the field of play with another victim in their wake. Who would’ve thought you could hit 8 home runs in any sport and lose? Nevertheless, that was our fate as Take a Wiff of This took advantage of our flawed positioning and “bambi-legged” approach to this new game. We lined up in the wrong places, batted in a crazy lineup, and just generally played a poor game. The defending champs, however, were solid in every phase and provided us a template to use going forward. They were respectful on the field and off. Model franchise through and through and we look forward to another game against you after we learn this crazy game.

Sons of Pitches vs. Wiffskey Militia Once again, thank you Jon for scheduling the second best team from last season for us in Week 1. I think he wanted to break our spirit early. We recognized some of their big hitters from last season and feared we just had really good seats to a home run derby. As it would turn out, they didn’t hit a ton of home runs and got the majority of their production from well hit balls or defense lapses on our part. They took a kickball approach to running the bases; as in just keep running. And it worked. We got baited into throwing at the runners (rookie mistake) which never works and paid the price. We scored 15 runs but all felt like the ‘bats just didn’t come alive’ in this game. How can you score 15 runs and have that feeling. Wiffleball is weird. They clearly have a “unique” blend of characters on their team and it must be their recipe for success because they beat us like we stole something. The Pitches eagerly await this rematch… - Will Buker

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Wiffskey Militia Wiffseky Militia vs. Wiffle Crush After all of the rain delays, the Militia (aka Loose Cannons) was anxious to get back on the field. It was a day to celebrate, not only our wins, but also the birthday of Craig Engfer (the league’s favorite ginger). He did not disappoint and was the homerun king of the night. Team Wiffle Crush gave us a scare in the first inning, but after the militia got one inning under their belt, there was no stopping us. The entire team contributed to the win and Wiffle Crush was a great opponent.

I have the best bottom lip in this league! Just saying!

Wiffseky Militia vs. Sons of Pitches All I can say is the Militia bats were on fire this game. Sons of Pitches played a great game and had some good hits, but it was hard to stop the Militia homeruns from both the girls and the guys. Our defense also did an amazing job, including a diving catch in the mud from the birthday boy! 2-0, a great start to the season...BOOM!!

Wiffle Crush Wiffle Crush vs. Wiffskey Militia This game was an eye opening experience for a lot of people on Wiffle Crush. This was the first time our team got together on the wiffle ball field. We need a couple more practices in order to play with the big boys, but at least i think we won't get any worse, and we can only get better from here. It was a good game for Wiffskey; they were hitting the bombs all over the fence. Good strategy.

Maaaan! I knew I should’ve played on my sister’s team!!!

Wiffle Crush vs. I’d Hit That What can I say, this was a better game. Our team started to pick it up. I’d Hit That was my old team with a couple new ringers that they picked up. It was a close game till the end. We ended up losing at the end by 2 runs....but next time we will be better prepared. Good Luck to you guys and see ya'll next week.

- Jon Reyes

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Diamonds in the Rough

Jon Mappin – Take a Wiff of This He’s athletic, he’s smart, he’s tall dark and handsome…what more can you ask for? Plus…look at him in his baseball uniform! Nom nom nom! He may be quiet and shy, but just get a few drinks and him, and he’s a blast in a glass! This Radford grad, is newly single and I’m ready for him to get out there and mingle!

Daniel Reyes – Wiffle Crush My other brother finally decided to come out and join his siblings in Wiffle Ball. He’s single (I think)), cute, athletic, knows how to dress, and really smart…graduated with an Engineering Degree at University of Tennesse, GO VOLS! Girls, whatever you do, DO NOT TOUCH HIS HAIR!


The Dirt BOYS NIGHT OUT!!!

Top Notch Recruiter

Witnessing a conversation held between Jeff “The SmoothOperator” and Roman “Chesapeake” Goldshteyn pretty much made my night. These two boys accompanied by Robbie Wright, and possibly Doug Werner (he was a casualty of war), are going to have a boys night and clean up with the ladies…except of course…not Robbie, he is only there for pure amusement factor…HE BETTER BE OR HIS ASS WILL BE HANDED TO HIM BY YOURS TRULY! Ok, enough with that rant, and back to the story, Eeen though Jeff & Roman are outgoing and loud and obnoxious and the list can go on, I think the guy that will be doing most of the clean up is the shy, quiet guy, Doug Werner. Jeff, Roman and Robbie can bait the girls, and Dougie can reel them in. I of course, being the nice person that I am, offered to pick them up after their done painting the town red. Luckily, I have an SUV with tons of trunk room, so I can fit a couple ladies or guys (who knows what they’re into) in my car for the ride home! So ladies, hold on to your skirts, and guys hold on to your junk cause these boys will be out on the town soon!

Congrats to Will Buker for having the most referrals this season, adding 16 newbies to his roster…including himself! Will and his team Sons of Pitches had no problem using up the $100 bar tab they won. I saw that the girls were drinking margaritas and such…and the boys…well they were getting double pitchers left and right playing their game of chandelier. I did have to get in on that action and beat up on their gator fans! Again, Congrats to Will Buker for having the most referrals this season!

James is ALWAYS Ready!!! No matter what is going on around him or what he’s doing, I think James Salgado has a 6th sense for cameras being pointed in his direction. He seems to always be ready for a picture. This picture is a prime example. But I’d like to look through Eddie Stryker’s photos to see if he’s got any pictures of James not ready for a picture. Because we all know how stealthy Eddie is with his camera! James, you are such a camera whore!

PDA?! Eww Gross! I do love the enthusiasm of new relationships, don’t really know this couple, so not sure how new it is. They definitely need to get a room. I’ve seen a couple pictures now of these two making out! COME ON NOW!!!! The least you can do is find a booth in the corner of the other side of the restaurant where its not so “public.” Ohhhh….you two lovebirds make me sick!

BE ON TIME!!! This is only in this section because I know ya’ll read this part of the newsletter. But this is to remind everyone to please be on time to your games. There is a 15 minute grace period for the 6:30 games ONLY! If the 6:30 games start late, then you’ll have a shorter game. The 7:30 games will start on time NO MATTER WHAT! The refs are only paid up to an hour and nothing more! So please make any arrangements you need to, to be on time. If you know you’re going to be late, make sure you let your captain know, so he/she can make arrangements to add a substitute to the roster. If the refs and Jeff White, who is coming all the way from Newport News can came it, then so can you. Ok thanks!

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Social Calendar of Events

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Charities & Sponsor Bar

Drink Specials • • • •

Food Specials

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Wiffle Ball Well, since no one wants to read the official Backyard Sports Club Wiffle Ball rules, here is a simple Wiffle Ball for Dummies to help you out as the season starts out! •

•  

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• •

  

• • • •

• •

• •

 •

• •

When running to first base, remember to run across the outside base. The reason for this is so the first baseman doesn’t crush you trying to tag you out. However, if you’re running to 2nd, you can touch 1st base and book it to 2nd.

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Wiffle Ball Well, since no one wants to read the official Backyard Sports Club Wiffle Ball rules, here is a simple Wiffle Ball for Dummies to help you out as the season starts out!

NO SLIDING!

NO CLEATS!

NO GLASS BOTTLES!

NO SMOKING! 12


Wiffle Ball MOST IMPORTANTLY….DO NOT, DO NOT THROW YOUR TRASH BAGS WITH EMPTY CANS OR BOXES OF “ADULT BEVERAGES” INTO THE TRASH RECEPTICALS THEY HAVE AT THE FIELDS.

These DO NOT Go Into the Trash Cans at the Fields:

The Field Manager has already warned us about this, and if he has to tell us one more time, he will take away our drinking privileges at the fields…or worse, he can end up kicking us off these fields all together! So PLEASE take your trash bag full of cans, cups, and boxes with you!!!

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The Dos and DONTs •

DO NOT bring alcoholic beverages to the field….or at least be discreet about it!

DO clean up after yourselves! Unfortunately, maid service was cut out of Backyard Sports Club’s budget due to the economy.

DO be friendly to the Refs: Please do not yell at them…just remember, you’re the one that will look like a jerk if you yell at them.

DO NOT be “that guy.” We do not own Uno Chicago Grill or the premises around it; so when you do something stupid, you’re not excluded from any laws just because you are wearing a Backyard Sports Club t-shirt.

DO NOT leave a fellow wiffleballer behind; we take care of our own. Don’t let your teammate drink like a champ and drive home. Find the closest decent looking guy/gal, introduce them, and have them go home together.

DO NOT be bitter. It’s super important that if you end up having a “sleep over” with a fellow wiffleballer, be cool with them for weeks to follow. We’re a small community, you’re gonna end up seeing them all season! When they drop you off at your car, hug it out, smile…and say “hi” the following week.

DO NOT try to guess that persons name!

DO go to our sponsor Bar, Uno Chicago Grill. It’s what the cool kids are doing.

DO NOT fight! This is a fun league, HAVE FUN! If you fight, fun’s over for you, you’ll be kicked out.

DO always wear your Backyard Sports Club shirt. I know laundry once a week may be too much, so it’s cool if you go a couple weeks without washing….unless you’ve got bad B.O. like Robbie Wright!

DO NOT smoke at the fields!

**DISCLAIMER** Nothing in the Backyard Sports Club Newsletter is to be taken seriously, except for the schedules and scores! Please send scores, recaps, pictures, questions, funny quotes, and/or any information that you would like to be added into the week’s newsletter to backyardsportsclub@gmail.com 14


H O T T I E S

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Norfolk, Virginia Backyard Sports Club, Blue Diamond & Sandlot Divisions


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