The Hardest Part of Spring— Being Planted

38 // April 2020 by Kelsey Callahan About The Author Hi! I’m Kelsey Callahan. I’m 24 years old and currently a graphic design major now with a minor in communication. I have a passion for the mission field and encouraging those around me, so I hope by sharing this that the Holy Spirit speaks to you. A flower is admired by all who see it, but what about the seed? If you’re like me, I never think about how a flower was once a seed, or even about the dirt it had to grow through before it bloomed. The seed is overlooked and is literally buried alive.

Do you ever feel like you’re in a stage where you’re the one who is constantly looked over? How about like you don’t have what it takes to do what God has placed in your heart? Well, I’m happy you’re reading this because I’m currently in that stage of life as well. It’s what I like to call, “the hardest part of spring.”

For the past two years of my life, it has felt like everything that could go wrong has gone wrong. My family received news that almost destroyed us, I didn’t receive the funds to go to the university of my dreams, I had to receive counseling for my growing fury, I was rejected from the Graphic Design program at UTC, I received news that my job is currently a dead end, since they are not accepting interns for my field in the communications department, and every internship I have applied for has turned me down. So, as you can see, I too have felt overlooked and like I am not enough. I have felt as if I’m being buried alive by uncertainties, and every new disappointment shovels more dirt into the hole that I’ve found myself in. I can’t seem to find my way out, no matter how much I pray for answers. It’s been silent, dark, and dirty. This has left me feeling unworthy and like I’m being punished.

For years, I have felt that God wanted me to pursue Graphic Design so I could use it to spread the Gospel. But that dream doesn’t look like what I expected it to. The hardest part about a God dream is being in between, or not knowing what He’s going to do with it when your plans for it shatter. His plans look very different than ours. Even though I feel like I misheard Him because things haven’t worked out the way I thought they would, I didn’t hear it wrong. This was all part of His plan. After thinking about spring, I have come to the realization that I’m not being buried alive. I’m being planted.

Even though it has been painful and scary, something very good will come from it. Just like a flower, even though I cannot see the seed, God is working to make something beautiful from the dirt around me. Despite being rejected from the graphic design program, I have been accepted into another: Integrated Studies. I am now pursuing both graphic design and communications. I won’t ever be a part of the art program, but now I have two majors and will graduate earlier. Galatians 6:9 says, “Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.” Brothers and sisters, I’m here to tell you that God is still working. He’s not finished with you yet. Even though it feels like your dreams have come to an end, our God is a God of resurrection. He can bring them back to life. Don’t give up; there is a purpose for all of this. Even though you cannot see it yet, He can. That’s why He keeps allowing life to pile on the dirt. It’s to prepare you and make you bloom! His timing is perfect, and everything will fall into place just as it should—“…at the proper time.” This is not the end; it’s only the beginning.