caught. But I was definitely tempted, yes. More
However, SiF also self-reported as being happier
“ It depends on the circumstances how often I
often than not I chose to stay away from boys.“
not to express her sexuality, stating that the conflict
will think of it, if I am with a partner then it is
- SiF
did seem to have reduced since leaving university
something that I think of frequently, whereas if
and being way from such peer pressure, and that “
I am single I tend not to really bother about it.
The researcher probed about whether this was in
opening the can of worms” was not something she
“ - SiF
fact a choice or if it was an avoidance through fear.
felt would be more conducive to her well-being.
“ When I was younger I was curious about it, I
For EF she reflected on whether it is so important
wondered what it would be like, and whether I
“ I’m probably happier to leave things as they
to her because it was something that she felt was
would enjoy it, but when I was younger it was
are as much as perhaps at times I’d like to over-
missing and was then found:
probably the fear that drove me away. “ - SiF
come it, on the whole I am probably happier just
“ Maybe its more important to me because I
to well I suppose it is the fight or flight thing, I
didn’t have it before, if one’s always had it,
“ It was fear that was holding me back, fear of
would kind of rather run away from it rather
always been aware of it, you don’t appreciarte
my religion, fear of my parents, I was being ac-
than have to face it. “ - SiF
something until its gone, or don’t appreciate something until you gain it, I don’t know. “ - EF
tively discouraged. “ - SiF SiF, along with MF, raised a very important and The participant stated that despite her initial feel-
crucial aspect of this study, that of oblivion. MF has
ings in regards sexual expression being so heavily
not been sexually active for over 4 years, and both
influenced by her religious beliefs and that of her
she and SiF masturbate very rarely. This raises the
parents, she now positively chooses to uphold the
question of whether in its absence you may indeed
beliefs.
be just as likely to experience well-being as you are
“ When I was younger fear override having sex
when it is central to your existence. Although for
and of course now it is my morals that overrides
MF this is a source of conflict because it is some-
any feelings of having sexual intercourse. “- SiF
thing she has experienced in the past.
Interestingly SiF was also the only participant
“ Sometimes I’ve had the odd feeling that I won-
whose sexual fantasies even seemed influenced by
der what it is like etc but I suppose because I’ve
her external morals, as if they permeated all the
never really had it therefore I can’t miss it. “ - SiF
way through her to create a repression even in her imagination.
“ Being alone I find that I quench my thirst somewhat. I don’t know that I do it on purpose. “ - MF
“ I have a kind of well, respectful fantasy, which is okay and nice. “ - SiF 70
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