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THE BUGLE NOVEMBER 7, 2013
Business & Real Estate
Effective managers deliver bad news with right words Q. I’ve been a manager for 15 years and am puzzled at how badly my employees take negative feedback. I attempt to diplomatically tell them when they are not team players or are rude or inappropriate, but they always end up offended. How do I deliver bad news without getting a bad reaction?
A. You can deliver bad news without a bad reaction if you avoid triggering shame in your employees. People at work feel personally attacked and confused if you use vague labels like “inappropriate.” People feel motivated to listen and change when they know exactly what behavior you want. Without meaning to alienate others, we trigger shame when we use vague descriptions that imply a person is inadequate or bad. Shame is different from guilt. When we feel shame we believe another person is making a judgment about our value as a human being. Guilt is remorse over something we have done and can do differently in the future. If your employees believe you think something is basically wrong with who they are, they will become hostile and demoralized. Next time you provide an employee with feedback, make it clear that you both face a problem and tell them what you need to help with the solution.
Make it crystal clear with the words you chose that the employee is not “the problem.” For instance, if you need accurate reports on your budget, do not tell the employee that he needs to stop being sloppy or careless. You are just using a negative label that will trigger shame. Instead tell the employee you need his help making sure there are zero math errors on the next budget. Even well meaning managers get frustrated and use negative labels. Instead of calling employees rude, stubborn or lazy, consider the problem you need solved and the behavior you want. Focus on treating your employee as an ally in resolving the problem and be specific about what you want them to do. You’ll be impressed at what magic specific requests will create. Very few employees get upset at being asked to arrive on time for a meeting. Every employee will be upset if instead you accuse them of being irresponsible, thoughtless and late. Using the right words at the right time with the right person can seem like wizardry
We take a job because we have to pay bills. But each of us hopes to find a workplace where we feel valuable and competent. when you see the different results you get. I’ve seen teams go from being demoralized and conflict-drenched to cooperative, harmonious environments just because everyone stopped using language that triggers shame. We take a job because we have to pay bills. But each of us hopes to find a workplace where we feel valuable and competent. Despite what you learned as a kid, the magic word isn’t just “please”; the magic words include, “Can you help me do this?” You won’t just transform your team if you change your language; you’ll encourage other managers to make similar changes. When they see the magic you are working within your department, everyone will want to know your new trick! Q. I have a coworker who seems to get all the breaks. I know I’m jealous and feel
petty about it, but I’d love to see her get fewer goodies. Is there anything wrong with spending time thinking about how to show people she isn’t so great? A. No, there isn’t anything wrong with thinking about showing people she isn’t so great. However, you’ll get further spending time thinking and showing people why you are so great than undermining your coworker.
(Daneen Skube, Ph.D., executive coach, trainer, therapist and speaker, also appears as the FOX Channel’s “Workplace Guru” each Monday morning. She’s the author of “Interpersonal Edge: Breakthrough Tools for Talking to Anyone, Anywhere, About Anything” (Hay House, 2006). You can contact Dr. Skube at www.interpersonaledge. com or 1420 NW Gilman Blvd., #2845, Issaquah, WA 98027. Sorry, no personal replies.)
(c) 2013 INTERPERSONAL EDGE DISTRIBUTED BY TRIBUNE CONTENT AGENCY, LLC.
When do I need umbrella insurance? Dear Dave, At what level of net worth should someone consider umbrella insurance? Matt Dear Matt, I think it’s something you should consider if you have a net worth of $500,000 or greater. But first you should be clear on what net worth really means. Net worth is what you own minus what you owe. So the fact that you make a million dollars a year is not the determining factor in whether or not you’re a millionaire. The only people who use that definition are the financially uninformed and politicians who twist things around and throw out catch phrases designed to further their own agendas. That being said, I would get umbrella insurance, which is extra liability insurance, when
you reach the half-million mark in net worth. Prior to that I’d suggest carrying $500,000 worth of liability on your homeowner’s, car insurance and any other policies that have liability attached to them. Once you reach and cross that $500,000 threshold in net worth, however, I’d advise picking up another $1 million in liability insurance, called an umbrella policy, that attaches to the top of that and covers everything for an additional $1 million. It’s a great buy, Matt.You can get it for about $200 a year in most states. —Dave
Debt snowball and rental property Dear Dave, Should rental property debt be included in the debt snowball?
Matthew Dear Matthew, No, it should not. The debt snowball is Baby Step 2 in my plan, where you stop saving and pay off all debt except for your home—and I would include rental properties in there—from smallest to largest. Prior to this, you should start with Baby Step 1, which is saving up a starter emergency fund of $1,000. As a reminder, Baby Step 3 is going back and fully funding your emergency fund with three to six months of expenses. Notice that I said expenses, not income. After that, Baby Step 4 is investing 15 percent of your household income in Roth IRAs and other pre-tax retirement plans, and Baby Step 5 means setting aside college money for the kids. Baby Step 6 is where you pay off your home, and Baby Step 7 is when you relax, build wealth, and give. Again, Baby Step 6 would include any rental properties that weren’t bought and paid for
with cash. My advice would be to pay off your home before taking care of the rental properties, and that’s simply a risk management perspective. Now, if you owe just $30,000 on your rental properties but still have a $3 million mortgage hanging over your head,you might go ahead and knock out the rental properties first. Think about it this way,Matthew. Which would you rather lose in a worst-case scenario: your home or your rental properties? If they’re in the same general range of debt, I’m going to pay off the home first and the rental properties last. —Dave * Dave Ramsey is America’s trusted voice on money and business. He’s authored four New York Times bestselling books: Financial Peace, More Than Enough, The Total Money Makeover and EntreLeadership. The Dave Ramsey Show is heard by more than 6 million listeners each week on more than 500 radio stations. Follow Dave on Twitter at @DaveRamsey and on the web at daveramsey.com.