Opinion & Comment
May 29, 2014, The Bridgton News, Page D
Dark Side of the Sun by Mike Corrigan BN Columnist
Asteroid heads toward Earth!!!
We’ve all seen the movie: an asteroid streaks toward the Earth, or a radioactive monster terrorizes the West Coast, or the Earth’s core heats up dangerously and needs to be hosed down, or the president has an aneurysm, so someone needs to volunteer to be miniaturized and go on a suicide mission in a guided time-release capsule. Average Americans panic. But cooler heads get together and solve the problem. Because that’s what Americans do. At least in the movies. President: Man, what a day! First I get a brain aneurysm, then the Godzilla thing, then the asteroid. Why do these crises happen all at once? Science advisor: Don’t forget the Earth’s core. President: #^%$&^! And to think I was flying to Hawaii for the weekend! Anyway, in the movie, after only a second or two for characterization (Morgan Freeman moodily staring out the White House window thinking, “Why Obama? Why not me, for real?”) and two minutes of tense discussion (with charts and graphs) detailing the destruction sure to ensue without quick intercession of American know-how and four billion dollars worth of armaments, some of them miniaturized, President Freeman makes an executive decision. And the call goes out: “BERSERKER, BERSERKER, ACTIVATE BRUCE WILLIS! THIS IS CODE INFRARED! ACTIVATE BRUCE WILLIS!” The rest, as they say, is movie history. If they make the movie and sequels in the right order, Bruce will still be alive to fly to the asteroid — an asteroid with considerable gravity, but only primitive roads — and blow that up, too. If they make the movies in the wrong order, we’ll be left with Schwartzeneggar for the Earth’s Core mission, and he’s pushing 70. These days, the governor would have some trouble beating up on that wimpy ET puppet, let alone Godzilla. Arnold: I’ll be — oh, my back! I mean, I’ll be… back! Director: Cut! Arnold: Medic! We Boomers never give up on our movie stars and our rockers. Bob: Oh, look, Carol — Gerry and the Pacemakers are coming to the Civic Center! Carol: Is it a reunion tour? Ted: For two members of the band, it’s a resurrection tour! Alice: Let’s g— oh, my back! It’s all show biz, though. Were a real asteroid hurtling toward Earth, bent on the destruction of all that’s holy — a category that would include… ah, um, this could take awhile — our politicians and opinion makers would not spring into action. Because that’s what the asteroid would be expecting them to do. Instead, they calmly discuss the issue. And ASTEROID, Page D
The girl in the crowd Views from the Uppermost House by S. Peter Lewis BN Columnist On paper, I am the dumbest person in my family. Although I have a college degree, my son (the marine engineer) and my daughter (the exercise physiologist) are both twice as educated as I am, and my wife (the nutritionist) has thrice the post-secondary schooling. I’m not ashamed or threatened by any of this, of course, because I have no problems with insecurity — plus, I’m losing my hair, which helps. It does, however, make it more logical (in a Spock-like
sort of way) for me to handle the less intellectually stressful jobs around the old homestead, such as scooping up the gooey entrails of dead rodents that the cats drag in and eviscerate in the hall closet. I’ve tried to put an academic spin on some of the more pedestrian household chores, to make them more palatable to those whose diplomas have finer filigrees than mine, but it doesn’t really work. My son does not fall for calls for help regarding fluid dynamics and the relationships between viscosity, velocity, matrix composition, and orifice diameter (a plugged toilet); my daughter will not help me by personally experiencing the metabolic changes in fast-twitch tissue triggered by verdant truncating (mowing the lawn); and my wife certainly isn’t fooled by pleas for assistance in reorganization efforts following post-masticatory entropy (straightening up the kitchen after supper). In every household, there are the thinkers and the doers, I suppose. (On this claim, I would get substantial pushback from the collective familial science eggheads, protesting that they both think and do, which I agree they do do, rather well actually. And just so you know, that is the first time I’ve manGIRL, Page D
PULLED FROM THE WATER — It’s one of those days when everybody is happy. The ice has finally disappeared, skies are blue, spring has sprung and IC is out of the clear water of Moose Pond. Best of all, this year it did not take four men and a rowboat to retrieve the ICE OUT contest icon. IC has joined Frosty in their summer retreat at the Bridgton Community Center garage. One man — Tim Cook; one truck — Lake Region Towing; and one hour. The initial IC rescue and securing IC to a tree at the edge of the lake was performed by Fred Hammerle and Chris Small. Thank you, Tim Cook, Fred Hammerle and Chris Small… IC is home.
Treating our enemies better than our heroes
Soldiers interest me, because I’ve never been one and because many are regular readers of this column. When they let me, I like to pick their brains because they’ve had experiences I’ve never had and never will have. I almost joined after high school, but didn’t, and I’ve often regretted that. Even if they haven’t been in combat, soldiers have worked and lived closely with others who have and it changed them in some fundamental way. My sense is that, for most, the change has been a net positive — especially for Marines and soldiers with elite training such as Special Forces and Seals. I’m very curious about how they perceive the enormous changes taking place in the government of the country they’ve offered their lives to defend. They are or have been instruments of that government, yet many I’ve talked to lately expressed profound dissatisfaction with it even before the VA scandal broke. Washington has deep misgivings about veterans too. In 2012, the Department of Homeland Security under Janet Napolitano profiled what sort of people are potential terrorists and the list included Iraq veterans. Also mentioned were “extreme right-wing” organizations, people who “believe that one’s personal and/or national ‘way of life’ is under attack,” or people who are “suspicious of centralized federal authority” and “reverent of individual liberty.” People of Janet Napolitano’s ilk consider the Tea Party an extreme right-wing organization, consequently this writer and many of my readers would fit the profile. So would virtually all conservative Republicans and Libertarians, as well. Surviving veterans, many of whom offered their lives in service to these individual liberties, are indeed suspicious
Letters Poetry of childhood
To The Editor: Recently, I attended my daughter, Dagny Leland’s fourth grade class at Stevens Brook Elementary School to work with her writing students. I have made several visits to this class over the school year and have found her students to be a wellbehaved bunch eager to improve their writing skills. The last visit was a session on poetry and I read to them my poem, A Tramp in Spring, you graciously printed in your Poet’s Corner. The kids asked if I thought they could ever have one of their poems in the paper. Well, it seems the class put their heads together and wrote a poem
Front Row Seat by Tom McLaughlin BN Columnist of increasingly centralized federal authority so disdainful of them as to consider them potential terrorists. The irony here is that 95% of terrorists worldwide are Muslims and over the last 13 years thousands of American soldiers have died and more than 100,000 others have been wounded while fighting them. Yet while the Obama Administration forbids profiling Muslim terrorists as Muslims, it has no problem profiling American veterans of the Iraq War as potential terrorists. Now consider that the VA gives “top-notch medical treatment” to Muslim terrorists imprisoned at Gitmo — far better than it provides to our veterans. According to information a Pentagon insider provided to Judicial Watch: “There are approximately 150 terrorists at Gitmo yet the VA has 100 doctors, nurses and healthcare personnel assigned to them, (retired Navy Commander J.D.) Gordon says. ‘Doctors and medical personnel are at their beck and call,’ he confirms, adding that they are readily available for things as minor as a cold, fever, toothache or chest and back pain. The jihadists who murdered thousands of Americans never have to wait, Gordon says, because the Gitmo patient to healthcare pro-
about Bridgton and sent it to me. I enclose the poem these wonderful students created in hopes that seeing their work in print will urge them to continue writing. Bridgton is the town of dreams Sewn together with lots of seams. There are wonderful parks the eye can see. We play and frolic just you and me. We swim at the lakes wild and free. We skip rocks on the water, one, two, three. Peter C. Berry Bridgton
To The Editor: Government of, by and for the corporate interests is giving us the business. Jon Chappell Bridgton
Festival dates set
Still vibrant
To The Editor: Just to clarify: The Village Folk Festival is set for Friday, Aug. 22 from noon to 10 p.m., and Saturday, Aug. 23 from 9 a.m. to 10 p.m. Each
day will have its own character and each will offer a different lineup of activities. You’ll want to plan to come for both! Please get in touch with one of the Planning Team members and find a way to participate! All kinds of help is needed! Lucia Terry Bridgton
The biz
To The Editor: Why do we folks from away reside in Bridgton? My wife, Elna, and I moved here from Miami, Fla., 10 years ago and love
the centuries-old appeal of the town homes, barns, stores, lakes, etc., and no traffic jams. Now, why do over 40,000 folks come to Bridgton in the summertime from Massachusetts, Rhode Island, Connecticut and New York, etc.? The town brings them back to their youth, grandparents, and times gone by. The Old Town Hall is part of their interest. We went to Martha’s
vider ratio is 1.5 to 1. ‘No problem, come right on in,’ Gordon writes in his piece. If you risked your life serving your country, however, the ratio is 35 to 1.” As Michelle Malkin points out that America’s illegal aliens get much better health care than our veterans too: “In New York, doctors report that nearly 40% of their patients receiving kidney dialysis are illegal aliens. A survey of nephrologists in 44 states revealed that 65% of them treat illegal aliens with kidney disease. In Memphis, a VA whistleblower reported that his hospital was using contaminated kidney-dialysis machines to treat America’s warriors. The same hospital previously had been investigated for chronic overcrowding at its emergency room, leading to six-hour waits or longer… In Arizona, illegal aliens incurred health-care costs totaling an estimated $700 million in 2009. (Meanwhile) in Phoenix, at least 40 veterans died waiting for VA hospitals and clinics to treat them, while government officials created secret waiting lists to cook the books and deceive the public about deadly treatment delays.” We’re hearing lots of excuses from Washington about the VA scandal. In spite of the fact that Obama made at least seven speeches in the last seven years promising he would not rest until he had fixed the waiting times at VA, and emphasizing how absolutely outraged he was about it, White House advisor Dan Ffeiffer had the gall to say last week that the president only recently heard about the problem on the news. This is our commander-in-chief, the man in whom our soldiers must have confidence when he sends them into battle. Tom McLaughlin of Lovell is a retired middle school U.S. History teacher.
Vineyard last week and stayed in historic Edgartown, which reminded us of the past, and we noticed that their Old Town Hall is still being used and is older than ours. We took pictures of the well-maintained building and are including a photo for this letter. I have spoken to many people about our Old Town Hall and have heard only positive things about main-
taining it and continuing use of this grand old building Tom Stone Bridgton
Short and sweet
To The Editor: The recent article in The Bridgton News indicates the town manager and the Bridgton Community Center staff are in the discussion stage of building an addition to the Community Center. At the same time, there are “plans” to “invest” money into the Town Hall to also meet the same needs. Can we afford both? The woman from Naples that has the Zumba class is not concerned about the mil rate in Naples being affected. Until such a time as we know what direction we are going in, we should pause and not rush to spend hunSTILL VIBRANT PART OF THE TOWN — The Old dreds of thousands of dollars Town Hall in Edgartown, Mass. is still in use, and it is before we are sure why. older than Bridgton’s Old Town Hall. LETTERS, Page D