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July 12-18, 2012

Vol. 9 • No. 28

Chattanooga’s Weekly Alternative THE BOWL










Thrive Studio • 191 River St. • 432.800.0676 • Facebook/ThriveStudio • Twitter: @thrivestudio1

Thrive Studio—Healthy Bodies, Happy Minds 2 • The Pulse • JULY 12-18, 2012 •


Since 2003

july 12-18, 2012 • vol. 9 no. 28

Chattanooga’s Weekly Alternative •

EDITORIAL Publisher Zachary Cooper Creative Director Bill Ramsey Contributors Rich Bailey • Rob Brezsny Chuck Crowder • John DeVore • Randall Gray Dr. Rick Pimental-Habib • Paul Hatcher Janis Hashe • Matt Jones • Chris Kelly D.E. Langley • Mike McJunkin • David Morton Ernie Paik • Alex Teach • Richard Winham Cartoonists Max Cannon • Richard Rice Tom Tomorrow Photography Jason Dunn • Josh Lang Interns Hadley James • Katie Johnston Patrick Noland • Cole Rose

ADVERTISING Advertising Director Mike Baskin Account Executives Rick Leavell • Emma Regev


COVER story

Phone 423.265.9494 Fax 423.266.2335 Email Got a stamp? 1305 Carter St. • Chattanooga, TN 37402

Rebooting the Library


• Corinne Hill leads Chattanooga’s Public Library system into the 21st century—at last. » 6 By Richard Winham

the fine print


Please limit letters to 300 words or less. Letters to the editor must include name, address and daytime phone number for verification. The Pulse reserves the right to edit letters for space and clarity.

The Pulse is published weekly by Brewer Media and is distributed throughout the city of Chattanooga and surrounding communities. The Pulse covers a broad range of topics concentrating on culture, the arts, entertainment and local news. The Pulse is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. No person without written permission from the publishers may take more than one copy per weekly issue. We’re watching. The Pulse may be distributed only by authorized distributors.

Paperback Ritter

• Josh Ritter is the next Dylan/ Springsteen. So why has nobody ever heard of him? » 11 By Richard Winham

© 2012 Brewer Media


BREWER MEDIA GROUP President Jim Brewer II

A ‘Forest Mandala’

David George Haskell

honest music

• Biology professor David George Haskell blends science and poetry in study of ecology. » 15 By Rich Bailey

local and regional shows

Kingsfoil, Ducky and the Vintage, The Royal Hounds ($5)

Thu, July 12


Paving Funk with Vapor Lock ($3)

Wed, July 18


Listen 2 Three with Telemonster ($3)

Thu, July 19


The Kymera Project ($3)

Wed, July 25


Free Irish Music • Sundays at 7pm

Sun, July 15: Olta • Sun, July 29: Molly Maguires

Full food menu serving lunch and dinner. 11am-2am, 7 days a week. 35 Patten Parkway * 423.468.4192 * • JULY 12-18, 2012 • The Pulse • 3






‘Chattanooga Music Man’ chosen as new North Shore sculpture pittsburgh artist james simon’s sculpture “Chattanooga Music Man” has been chosen by public vote as the next piece of permanent public art to find a home in Chattanooga. The sculpture, one of three candidates funded by Public Art Chattanooga and the North Chattanooga Public Art Project during All Things North Shore last month, will be installed at Woodland and Frazier Avenues in a grassy area in front of Walgreens by the end of October. The sculpture is provided free of public funding. “Dramatic, larger than life, unexpected,

Bike Chattanooga still on training wheels

A clay model of James Simon’s “Chattanooga Music Man” is superimposed on the site at Woodland and Frazier Avenues where it will be installed this fall.

and elegant, the sculpture depicts a fiddler serenading to folks as they walk or drive by” said Simon. “ The fiddler ties into Chat-

4 • The Pulse • JULY 12-18, 2012 •

tanooga’s rich music and working class culture, both past and present. The music composition creates a universal ambiance of remembrance of times past, joy for the present, and future.” Standing at over 8 feet tall and more than 4 feet wide, the sculpture will first be created in clay, and then with plaster molds which are cast in a special high-strength, glass-fiber-reinforced architectural concrete. “My concrete medium has been proven and tested; it’s long lasting, all weather hardy, tough and low maintenance” said Simon. A four-foot concrete foundation is poured under the sculpture with rebar running from the foundation into the hollow sculpture. The piece is then half filled with concrete, permanently securing it to the foundation. More than 1,300 votes were tallied over a two week period from the North Shore Chamber of Commerce, local merchants and social media. With nearly 50 percent of the vote, Simon’s sculpture came away as the next piece to be added to the city’s award-winning public art program. More than 75 artists nationwide submitted applications, three of which were presented as finalists for the community to vote on. The Public Art Committee, which raised the funds to commission this work, celebrates the diversity and unique sense of community in the North Shore and provides this sculpture free of public funding. Public Art Chattanooga, a division of the City of Chattanooga Parks and Recreation Department, is dedicated to introducing a wide variety of high-quality public art into the community, enhancing the civic environment and enriching the lives of visitors and residents. All Things North Shore is co-produced by Public Art Chattanooga and North Shore Fellowship. For more information on Public Art Chattanooga, contact Peggy Townsend at or visit For more information on All Things North Shore, visit For more information on James Simon, visit his website at —Staff

excited about a ride (but mostly excited about not walking) across the Scenic City, I dusted my inner thighs with Gold Bond, covered them with my bicycle shorts and headed down to the rent-a-bike rack in front of Renaissance Park. Unfortunately, my Tour de Chatt was not to be; the bikes were secured as tightly as I had previously held onto my excitement. The Chattanooga Bicycle Transit System operated by Alta Bicycle Share hasn’t gotten off to the rolling start that we predicted. Those beautiful blue and green two-wheelers, poised so neatly in their conveniently placed kiosks, have been little more than eye-candy so far. A posting on their website explains (kind of) the delay: “Beta testing of the City of Chattanooga’s Bike Chattanooga Bicycle Transit system must be prolonged, due to the need for additional technical adjustments. Public launch will be delayed until the system works flawlessly for the public.” That is promising news, but unfortunately it was posted to their website back on May 8. By now I’ve been stretching my glutes and hams for a while. Since when did this borrow-a-bike idea become rocket science? What do you have to do to get a bike around here, calibrate a satellite? Well … um … yeah, you kind of do in a way. “Bike Chattanooga’s hardware and software is a completely new generation of technology for bicycle transit systems, and will set a new standard for the industry,” Alta explained. Oh. That sounds serious. In fact it is. Outdoor Chattanooga Bicycle Coordinator Phil Pugliese explained that Chattanooga is the launch-pad for Alta’s new technological system, and with that comes some glitches that need to be worked out before it’s installed in other cities, like New York, where over 10,000 bicycles are scheduled to be available for sharing by the end of July: “Basically the vendor is developing new technology that includes many upgrades over previous designs and that has taken longer than expected. It’s a complex system involving tracking the bicycles, credit card operations, solar mast and new color LCD screens. Launch dates are always tricky, but the main thing is that the bikes are here, they’re in place, they’re functioning and we’re getting very close to opening operations.” Which is good news, not only for Chattanooga, but also for the other cities who stand to benefit from new bicycle-sharing technology. —Cole Rose


Back Row continues with ‘On Coal River’

The Mighty 3rd

3rd District Candidates The TV Ad Money War

Primary Election: Aug. 2, 2012 General Election: Nov. 6, 2012 Chuck Fleischmann Republican, Officeholder Cash: $938,817* TV Ads June 21-July 3: $33,204** Weston Wamp Republican, Son of Zach Cash: $482,779* TV Ads June 21-July 3: $54,199**

the back row film series, presented by the Arts and Education Council, continues with a screening of “On Coal River” on at 6 p.m. on July 14 at Green|Spaces, located at 63 E. Main St. “On Coal River” is a documentary that has been travelling the country since 2010 displaying the risks of irresponsible mountain-top removal tactics that have plagued Appalachian communities for the last century. Coal River Valley is one such community surrounded by lush mountains and a looming toxic threat. “On Coal River” follows a former coal miner and his neighbors in a David-and-Goliath struggle for the future of their valley, their children and life as they know it. Shot over a fiveyear period, the film follows the transformation of four remarkable individuals as they fight for the valley they love—and for future generations.

Scottie Mayfield Republican, Milkman Cash: $450,648* TV Ads June 21-July 3: $18,340** Bill Taylor Democrat, Bidnessman Cash: $21,710* TV Ads June 21-July 3: $812.50** The numbers are revealing. When Chris Carroll of the Times Free Press recently examined local television ad spending by 3rd District congressional candidates for the period of June 21 to July 3—more than 50 ads a day for two weeks—the three top Republican candidates spent a combined total of $131,826 across four stations. The Democrats? $812.50. What’s more interesting is placement. Incumbent Chuck Fleischmann bought time around “The Late Show with David Letterman,” “Meet the Press” and “Nightline,” rotating two ads 220 times. Weston Wamp opted for “Good Morning America,” “Inside Edition” and “NCIS,” with three ads spinning 352 times. Scottie Mayfield covered the game shows—“Jeopardy,” “The Price is Right” and “Wheel of Fortune,” with 91 spots. Meanwhile, Democrat Bill Taylor spent less than $1,000 for four four-second spots that aired around the Belmont Stakes on June 9, according to the TFP. Mary Headrick? Nothing, which is probably a smart move. These choices reveal each candidates’ target audience—or at least who they presume is their target audience. Chuck seems to believe his likely followers are hip and informed. Weston played the field, choosing shows he probably watches. Most revealing are Scottie’s choices— game shows all represent a gamble. Expect a deluge again ahead of the Aug. 2 primary. * **Chattanooga Times Free Press

Adding excitement to the occasion, filmmakers Adams Wood and Francine Cavanaugh will be in attendance and lead a question-and-answer session after the film, not only about the controversy over Appalachian coal mining, but also the making of a grassroots documentary film. “There were a lot of extreme ups and downs along the way in terms of the story, funding, etc.,” explained Cavanaugh. “We really had no idea this would be a six-year project. We kept holding out for a clear ending that seemed to be perpetually just around the corner” added Wood. Ultimately, they came away triumphantly, picking up 2011’s Best Documentary award from the Appalachian Film Festival. “We learned what a big impact a committed group of individuals can have. When we started the film, very few people outside of Appalachia were talking about mountaintop removal,” said Cavanaugh. “On Coal River” is not only furthering that conversation, but also doing it in award-winning style. There will be a reception at 6 p.m., followed by the screening at 6:30 p.m. and the Q&A session with the filmmakers at 7:45 p.m. —Cole Rose

On the Beat

alex teach

Chattanooga Prostitutes chattanooga prostitutes. note the location-specific title. Coincidence? No. Chattanooga-area prostitutes have a unique distinction from all others across the country as judged by an extremely qualified and extremely objective group: A past crew of the Fox television staple “Cops.” These cats crisscross the country year round and work cities from 100,000 to 11,000,000 in density. And what was their one defining distinction for Chattaboogie? “Good GOD, guys. You have the ugliest hookers we ever seen. I’m serious. What the hell kind of tourist town is this?!” a grizzled cameraman (ironically named John) said. Having never solicited prostitutes in other towns (much less worked their beats as a cop), it had never occurred to me before that prostitutes were anything other than “fugly,” as granddaddy Zug Teach used to say. It doesn’t seem like a big deal until you realize the far-reaching implications this has on a town, both socially and economically. Think: What does it say about the median income of our local populace? It says they are broke, or at least cripplingly cheap customers. When a customer is cheap at a restaurant, they tip poorly. Poor tips mean wait staff quit for better pay elsewhere, and they’re replaced by inferior workers. Inferior workers mean customer dissatisfaction and therefore fewer customers patronize the place and the business struggles. Same thing with hookers, except in this case the business failing is represented by a systematic loss of teeth by the staff

The ugliest hookers ‘Cops’ has ever seen. (no pun intended) and an increase in the percentage of their bodies covered by grime and sores. And so go the prices, and so goes the quality of the product (or at least its marketability). Second, this “Hookernomics” then has a direct impact on out-of-town businessmen who our chamber of commerce goes to a great deal of trouble to lure here. You take your average guy, subject him to long days of airports, cramped seating and the general irritation of travel, then place him in a hotel room he didn’t pay for in a town where no one knows him. How could he be expected to not solicit a prostitute? And what does he get? The chick from the “Grudge” movies. And “boom”, Chattanooga just lost its next rubber dogshit factory and I don’t get a raise again. Great. Now let’s continue to break down the column title: “Prostitutes.” Despite the many different names for them,

“prostitute” is my preference because the formality of the name is made ironic when put together with the hideous local specimens, and it’s also appropriate to use that word around children. Where to spot them? Well, out of decency to the people trying to live and raise their children there (and therefore, after the first few times I saw kids playing with the used needles and condoms they leave in their yards, I do not consider prostitution a “victimless crime”), you only have to look for dirty hitchhikers in narrow roadways off of East 23rd Street. The chick with the glassy, vacant eyes, invariably dirty, sandaled feet, and a purse that it looks like she lives out of it? She’ll be the one speaking to an older minister or preacher who, if caught (again) will just insist he was trying to “preach” to her (with his nah-nah involved in the sermon, apparently). It’s an ugly world, and it takes quite a few missed dance recitals to wind up in that vocation, but they are there, and Richard Gere isn’t going to be driving by anytime soon in his Lotus to romanticize this dark vocation. Alex Teach is a fulltime police officer of nearly 20 years experience. The opinions expressed are his own. Follow him on Facebook at facebook. com/alex.teach. • JULY 12-18, 2012 • The Pulse • 5



Chattanooga snagged Corinne Hill from Dallas to lead the city’s library system— and she doesn’t play by the old rules. By Richard Winham


Photos by Jason Dunn

ompanies that build prisons have a very simple formula to determine how many cells they’ll need in the future: They simply look at the number of children in the third grade not reading at grade level. When Corinne Hill, the new executive director of the Chattanooga Public Library heard that statistic, she decided that libraries had to change the way they serve the public. Before Hill—who has worked for libraries for more than 20 years—moved to Chattanooga she’d been the interim director of the Dallas Public Library for 18 months. Dallas clearly had no idea who they had in Hill. A petite blonde, Hill gives the impression of a quiet, retiring personality, but spend five

minutes in her company, and it’s plain that she isn’t someone prone to sit and wait. She wants the world and wants it now. Yesterday, if possible. Communicating an intense sense of urgency, she talked almost non-stop for over an hour about her vision for the library. And no wonder. Since the 1980s public li-


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6 • The Pulse • JULY 12-18, 2012 •

At the corner of MLK & Broad Street Downtown

The Read House

423 266 4121

As Hill sees it, literacy no longer means simply the ability to read words on a page. It means understanding technology, money and pictures. She wants to help children develop a successful relationship with the real world, while inspiring them to delve into their own imaginations. braries, including Chattanooga’s library, have allowed the world to pass them by. People instead to preferred to pay for books at Barnes & Noble, Borders and Amazon—and more recently the online—the way previous generations made use of the library. Hill is determined to get them back, starting with children. One of the projects that most excites her is the new library planned for East Brainerd. She’s helping design it, and her ideas are a taste of the what she has in mind for the downtown library’s massive four floors, which each measure 218,000 square feet. The children’s section in the planned library is designed with real children in mind. Gone is the cliched grey-bunned, tut-tutting prim librarian bossing her young charges, hushing them into submission and forcing them to read what she thinks is appropriate. Hill envisions the children’s library as a romper room

where they can sit within the stacks in comfortable little nooks and curl up with a book. “The children are allowed to climb on the shelves because that’s what they want to do anyway,” she said, smiling at the notion that a library should impose quietude and discipline. But even before they can read she wants to introduce them to a program called “Baby Bounce.” Hill bristles at the notion that stores like Barnes & Noble think they can wrest the care and intellectual feeding of pre-schoolers away from librarians trained for a task that requires more than the ability to lead the children in a few games. The little ones are encouraged to look at the library as a place to play, while the librarians ensure first that they’re learning essential motor skills, and later the literacy essential for success. “We’re raising a generation of children who are ready to learn,” she said.


DOWNTOWN Monday-Thursday: 9 a.m.-8 p.m. Friday-Saturday: 9 a.m.-6 p.m. Closed Sunday NORTHGATE/EASTGATE Monday-Thursday: 11 a.m.-8 p.m. Closed Friday Saturday: 11 a.m.-8 p.m. Sunday: 1-5 p.m. SOUTH CHATTANOOGA Monday-Thursday: 9 a.m.-6 p.m. Saturday: 9 a.m.-6 p.m. Closed Friday and Sunday

As Hill sees it, literacy no longer means simply the ability to read words on a page. It means understanding technology, money and pictures. She wants to help children develop a successful relationship with the real world, while inspiring them to delve into their own imaginations. One of the challenges for any librarian is engaging teenagers. So far, Hill and her staff have been successful in bringing young children back to the library. But teenagers, she said, reject “anything with a structure— they’re too cool for it.” Nevertheless, »P8

Corinne Hill in her downtown office at The Public Library. • JULY 12-18, 2012 • The Pulse • 7

Another challenge for the library has been Chattanooga’s homeless population, who’ve looked to the library as a daytime refuge from the elements .... Hill had maintenance crews pressure-wash the stone, restore the fountain, and she shooed away the “people out front drinking beer, smoking cigarettes and yelling at you.”

her goal is to create a “safe place” for teenagers where they “don’t feel they’re being supervised, but are.” With that in mind she envisions turning the fourth floor of the main library into a “creative incubator,” designed to fire the imaginations of middle- and high-school students by using the light-speed computing power developed by EPB. She sees a space where “they can build things, make music, make movies—where they can develop and make things that are their own.” As for the layout of the space, suffice it to say that it won’t resemble the libraries familiar to most of us. Computing will be wireless, freeing the kids to roam. When they need a break, they’ll have foosball tables, couches, refrigerators and microwaves. In addition to laptops and desktop computers, she’ll have interactive white boards. “You can write on the table and then swish it up on the wall. ‘Hawaii 5-0’ does that a lot,” Hill said. Another challenge for the library has been Chattanooga’s homeless population, who’ve looked to the library as a daytime refuge from the elements. One of the first things she did after taking over as director in February was to clean up the front of the library. Hill had maintenance crews pressure-wash the stone, restore the fountain, and she shooed away the “people out front drinking beer, smoking cigarettes, and yelling at you.” Hill also established some basic rules about drinking and smoking in and around the library, and because the homeless community has its own hierarchy, word soon passed through the ranks that the library wasn’t such a soft spot anymore. Most have apparently gotten the message. But one afternoon recently, as Hill was walking into the library after lunch, she saw “a guy sleeping on the steps. I woke him up and told him he had to pick up his stuff and move on,” she said. Librarians like rules, she told me; even those dedicated to shaking the institution from its foundations. Most of her colleagues have embraced her vision. Library manager Mary Jane

8 • The Pulse • JULY 12-18, 2012 •

Spehar sees her as someone bringing long needed changes to a moribund institution. “There’s been a need for change, and the board … has found somebody that will help us make the kind of library this society wants,” she said. Consensus on the need for change is perhaps not surprising, since many of the old guard have moved on—like the woman Hill worked with in Texas when the library began introducing computers in the early 1990s. “I still remember working with a woman named Jess,” Hill recalled. “They were training everybody—‘This is a mouse.’ She was scheduled for her class, and she said, ‘I’m done.’ She just looked at our boss, and said, ‘I’m going over to the retirement office in the morning on my way in ... I can’t do this.’ She wasn’t the only one.” But for those who stayed, such as Barbara Kreischer—the librarian responsible for stocking the library—the digital age is a delight. Sitting in her brightly lit office in the basement of the library, she enthused about the myriad options available to her and everyone using the library. “What we concentrate on now is not so much having the material in the building, but on having access to the material,” she said. These days patrons may borrow a hardcover copy or an audio book, or they can download it onto a Kindle. But most importantly, she said, echoing Hill’s avowedly democratic approach, “Our acquisitions have become much more patrondriven. There’s no longer this policy that we as librarians will review the journals, review the books, and that we’ll be the ones to decide whether or not they should be added to the collection. The idea is that when our patrons say, ‘This is what I want,’ we’re trying to make sure that’s what we have for them.” Whether or not Corinne Hill will be able to fully realize her vision for the library is largely contingent on funding. But in the meantime she’s doing all she can to put the library back in the game, no small feat after several decades of benign neglect.



july 12-18


• Local rockers open the show for Deer Tick. FRI 07.13 • 7 p.m. River City Stage Miller Plaza Downtown Chattanooga nightfallchattanooga. com

» pulse PICKS

» pulse pick OF THE LITTER


Deer Tick at Nightfall

MUSIC Kingsfoil • Frankie Muniz of TV’s “Malcom In The Middle” joined Kingsfoil as their drummer in early 2012. 9 p.m. • The Honest Pint • 35 Patten Pkwy. (423) 468-4192 •

home game


EVENT Democrats Debate • The Rev. Kenneth Love moderates a debate between local Democratic candidates. 6 p.m. • St. Paul AME Church 2514 Williams St. •

Thu, July 12 • 7:15 PM First Responders Night


Fri, July 13 • 7:15 PM Lifeguard Baseball Giveaway & Fireworks!

MUSIC • Cristabel consistently works magic on the JJ’s stage. 8 p.m. • JJ’s Bohemia • 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400

Beer Tasting Night

Presented by Riverside Beverage Co.

Back in Black: AC/DC Tribute • They’ve got the jack. 10 p.m. • Rhythm & Brews 221 Market St. •

EVENT “The Music Man” • Popular, classic musical. 8 p.m. • Signal Mountain Playhouse 301 Rolling Way • Signal Mountain

Memorial PINK! Jersey Auction & Fireworks!

vs. Smokies

Myron Noodleman

vs. Smokies

Sat, July 21 • 7:15 PM

Karen Mills


vs. Smokies

Fri, July 20 • 7:15 PM



vs. Blue Wahoos

Thu, July 19 • 7:15 PM

Cristabel & The Johns

• Tennessee comic kicks off two-night stand. 9:30 p.m. • Vaudeville Café 138 Market St. • (423) 517-1839

vs. Blue Wahoos


he Nightfall concert series brings some great music talent to the stage each Friday during its run—however, there are always one or two absolute standouts in the series lineup in any given year. This Friday is one of those special evenings, when Deer Tick takes the stage. Hailing from Providence, R.I., and originating as a side project for guitarist and singer-songwriter John McCauley (above), Deer Tick takes

its sound cues from folk, alt-country, punk and power pop. Their latest album, Divine Providence, has decidedly taken them further towards the punk spectrum while retaining the familiarity and their roots that gained them a large following. With appearances on “The Late Show with David Letterman,” at SXSW, festivals and headlining venues—as well as inaugurating the band feature on Brian Williams’ Internet music interview show

BriTunes (what?)—this is a major act with major credibility. Local favorites Behold The Brave open the show for Deer Tick and shouldn’t be missed either. Deer Tick with Behold the Brave 7 p.m. Friday, July 13 Nightfall River City Stage at Miller Plaza, 850 Market St. • JULY 12-18, 2012 • The Pulse • 9

10 • The Pulse • JULY 12-18, 2012 •

Party at the richard winham

Paperback Ritter why is it that josh ritter, who is scheduled to play at Track 29 with his Royal City Band on July 28, isn’t better known in the U.S.? Although he’s a gifted storyteller with an ear for a catchy melody, he’s yet to have a Top-40 single, a sold-out tour or a popular tribute band playing his songs to enthusiastic audiences—all of which have occurred in Ireland, where he’s hugely popular. One answer: Ritter’s songs—reminiscent of mid1960s Dylan, early Paul Simon, and some of Springsteen’s early work—are long, dense, and read like short stories. Although the Irish have a long tradition of loving a wellturned phrase and rock critics in this country tend to laud this kind of writing, American music fans are often slow to embrace it. According to Nielsen’s Soundscan, Ritter’s best-selling album sold a mere 61,000 copies. The sad paradox is that the U.S. music business, as everyone knows, tends to reward dross no matter how much critics appreciate artists like Ritter—and they do. By his third album, The Animal Years (2006), reviewers were rhapsodizing about his lyrical and melodic gifts. It’s a collection of well-crafted songs, many of which focus on death, both literally and figuratively. One such is “Wolves,” a pounding Springsteenstyle anthem with a catchy sing-along chorus that belies the song’s theme about a desperate man lost in the woods and surrounded by wolves as a metaphor for the loss of a lover: “Then winter came and there was little left between us / Skin and bones of love won’t make a meal.” The singer’s

resignation in the verses is broken by the soaring, celebratory chorus endlessly repeating, “So long, so high,” over a rising piano riff—the kind of writing Springsteen perfected in the late ’70s and early ’80s. It’s arena-rocking stuff, but even The Boss had a hard time

selling songs like this. Stuffed full of long, complex story songs, the album was widely admired, but didn’t sell well. Perhaps this explains why, by So Runs The World Away (2010), Ritter began to strip away his Dylan-like convolutions in search of the perfect pop song. “Change of Time,” the second song on the album, possesses the simple melodic insistence of a classic pop song with the kind of swelling melodic accompaniment you’d expect to hear on a Bobby Vinton ballad. Needless to say, the lyric is a bit more sophisticated—“I had a dream last night / and when I opened my eyes / Your shoulder, your spine / Were shorelines in the moonlight / New worlds for the weary.” This is teen pop for adults. Ritter has a gift for melody and a poet’s ear for language. But even though he flirts with pop on So Runs The World Away, his songs on that album are still too complex for casual consumption. On his next release, however, the six-song EP, Bringing In The Darlings (2012), he sounds for all the world like John Lennon on Double Fantasy. On the second of the six tracks, “Love’s Making It’s Way Back Home,” he croons a simple love song reminiscent of Buddy Holly, his voice drenched in echo and a softly cooing chorus drifting in behind him. It’s his most accomplished pop song to date with a chorus so catchy it begs come on and sing along—“Darlin’ / Will you let me call you darlin’ ” … it’s an earworm looking for a home. Perhaps as an

outlet for the more complex writing found in his early albums, Ritter published his first novel, “Bright’s Passage,” last summer. In a review for the New York Times Book Review, Stephen King suggested that he keep at it. “This is the work of a gifted novelist, but the size of that gift has yet to be determined,” King wrote. It’ll be interesting to see where he goes from here. Judging by a 2010 interview in The New York Times, Ritter has accepted that he’s probably not going to make the cover of Rolling Stone. It’s apparently more important to him (as well as to the fans who’ll catch his show at Track 29) that his writing gets better with each new release. The conundrum faced by many of Ritter’s heroes—including Leonard Cohen, with whom he’s often compared—is that success as a writer doesn’t necessarily mean commercial success. If writers make peace with that, as appears to be the case with Ritter, they’re freed from the star-making machinery that Joni Mitchell came to loathe and became more able to focus on crafting memorable songs. That’s something Ritter appears to be able to do with ease. And if he needs commercial success, he’s always got Ireland. Josh Ritter 9 p.m. • Saturday, July 28 $15/$17 Track 29 • 1400 Market St. (423) 588-0029

Richard Winham is the host and producer of WUTC-FM’s afternoon music program and has observed the Chattanooga music scene for more than 25 years.

All Week Long!

Mon & tue LIVE DJ

Wii on the Big Screen wednesdays

Jonathan Wimpee Jam Session thursdays LOCAL LEGENDS






THE REGULARS BAND Party on Two Floors!

1st Floor: Live Music • 2nd Floor: Dancing

Raw Sushi Bar

Restaurant & Nightclub 409 Market Street •423.756.1919 • JULY 12-18, 2012 • The Pulse • 11



Thu 07.12

Thursday • July 12

Schwervon • Monocots

Friday • July 13

Christabel and the Jons • Royal Hounds

Saturday • July 14

Soul Mechanic • Velvet Hand Blue Horizon

Sunday • July 15

Nat Hall (US XMAS) Mike Scheidt • Cabot Cover

Sunday • July 15

Class Actress with Special Guest

Tuesday • July 17

Comedy Buffet with Nate Bargatze

Wednesday • July 18

Valient Thorr • Ramming Speed The Kickass • Red Necklace

Thursday • July 19

Unspoken Triumph • Monomath Planet Hate


The Kymera Project 6:30 p.m. Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View Ave. (423) 267-0968 Trevor Watts & Veryan Weston 7:30 p.m. Barking Legs Theatre, 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5347 Schwervon, Monocots 8 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400 Kingsfoil with Ducky and the Vintage & The Royal Hounds 9 p.m. The Honest Pint, 35 Patten Pkwy. (423) 468-4192 Erick Baker with Elenowen 9 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St.

fri 07.13



THU. with ELENOWEN — From “The Voice” 9p




Jordan Hallquist 9 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. (423) 634-9191 Deer Tick, Behold the Brave 7 p.m. NightFall Music Series, River City Stage at Miller Plaza, 850 Market St. WTM Blues Band 7 p.m. Top of the Dock, 5600 Lake Resort Terr. Bounty Hunter 8 p.m. Acoustic Café, 61 RBC Dr., Ringgold, Ga. (706) 965-2065 Fox Mountain Express 8 p.m. The Camp House, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081 Cristabel and the Jons, Royal Hounds 8 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400 Kathy Tugman

12 • The Pulse • JULY 12-18, 2012 •

8:30 p.m. The Foundry (at the Chattanoogan), 1201 Broad St. (423) 756-3400 Pat Anderson 9 p.m. Southside Saloon & Bistro, 1301 Chestnut St. (423) 757-4730 Scenic City Soul Revue 9:30 p.m. Sugar’s Ribs, 507 Broad St. (423) 508-8956 New Binkley Brothers, Big Kitty 10 p.m. Sluggo’s, 501 Cherokee Blvd. (423) 752-5224 Rosedale Remedy 10 p.m. T-Bones, 1419 Chestnut St. (423) 266-4240 Fly By Radio 10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. Code Blue 10 p.m. SkyZoo, 5709 Lee Hwy. (423) 468-4533 Blackcat Moon 10 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Road (423) 499-9878

sat 07.14 Lumbar 5 10 a.m. Chattanooga Incline Railway, 3917 St. Elmo Ave. (423) 821-4224 Michael Jacobs 12:30 p.m. River Market at Aquarium Plaza, W. Aquarium Way (423) 648-2496 MANIFEST 8 p.m. The Camp House, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081 Cody Turpen 8 p.m. Acoustic Café, 61 RBC Dr., Ringgold, Ga. (706) 965-2065

ERICK BAKER THU 07.12 9 p.m. Rhythm & Brews • 221 Market St. Martha Ann Brooks and Andrew Kelsay 8 p.m. Charles and Myrtle’s Coffeehouse, 105 McBrien Road (423) 892-4960 Soul Mechanic, Velvet Hand, Blue Horizon 8 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400 Kathy Tugman 8:30 p.m. The Foundry (at the Chattanoogan), 1201 Broad St. (423) 756-3400 Queen B and the Well Strung Band 9:30 p.m. Sugar’s Ribs, 507 Broad St. (423) 508-8956 Back in Black: A Tribute to AC/DC 10 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St. Blackcat Moon 10 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Road (423) 499-9878 Hap Henninger 9 p.m. The Office, 901 Carter St. (423) 634-9191

sun 07.15 Danimal Pinson 10 a.m. Urban Spoon, 207 Frazier Ave. (423) 710-3252 Michael Jacobs, Anna Johnson, Pat Anderson 12:30 p.m. Chattanooga Market at First

Tennessee Pavilion, 1826 Reggie White Blvd. Olta 7 p.m. The Honest Pint, 35 Patten Pkwy. (423) 468-4192 Nate Hall, Mike Scheidt, Cabot Cove, Class Actress 8 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400

tue 07.17 Ry Glover 7 p.m. The Camp House, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081 Comedy Buffet with Nate Bargatze 8 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400 Nathan Angelo with Andy Davis 9 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St.

wed 07.18 Valient Thorr, Ramming Speed, The Kickass, Red Necklace 8 p.m. JJ’s Bohemia, 231 E. MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400 Paving Funk with Vapor Lock 9 p.m. The Honest Pint, 35 Patten Pkwy. (423) 468-4192 Chris & Greg 9 p.m. Bud’s Sports Bar, 5751 Brainerd Road (423) 499-9878 Long Gone Darlings with Kentucky Knife Fight 9:30 p.m. Rhythm & Brews, 221 Market St.

Map these locations on chattanoogapulse. com. Send live music listings at least 10 days in advance to: calendar@

Sound Check Valient Thorr: Beard Metal “this is the most compelling evidence for extraterrestrial life that I have ever seen.” Such was my reaction after checking out a particularly enlightening interview with Valient Himself, frontman for the band Valient Thorr. Himself, in this interview and numerous others, claims that he and his four band members are originally from Venus—or more accurately, from the inside of Venus, seeing as all its inhabitants went underground after overpopulation, nuclear warfare, and the heat from planet-wide sulfur clouds rendered the surface inhospitable. He delivers a rambling (yet oddly convincing) origin story quickly and with hurried breath, finally stopping long enough to let bassist Dr. Professor Nitewolf Strangees be the elucidator. Nitewolf explains that the place most people think they’re from—Chapel Hill, N.C.—is really just Valient Thorr’s surrogate Earth home; a close facsimile of what it’s like on their own planet, only with a more barbecue restaurants and less noxious clouds. If they’re joking, it’s veiled beneath those monstrous patches of facial hair and Valient’s intense gaze. That said, fans of Motörhead and “Bark at the Moon”-era Ozzy may want to start pricing tickets to Venus quickly, if Valient Thorr is any indication of the music scene there. Lemmy and Ozzy are the forefathers of what’s coming to be known as “beard metal”—a high octane mix of thrash and stoner metal that hates razors but loves super cheap beer—and few metal bands can bring such an unadulterated sound to a smaller stage the way Valient Thorr can. Between dueling lead lines, staccato thunder-drumming and shirtless convulsions, the band harkens back to the days when denim and PBR were not the realm of the hipster, but the blue-collar forklift driver who lived in his parents’ basement and banged his head to his Walkman all day. It was that guy who really got what Valient Thorr’s interplanetary mission is all about. —Patrick Noland Valient Thorr 9 p.m. • Wednesday, July 18 JJ’s Bohemia 231 MLK Blvd. (423) 266-1400

Between the Sleeves

901 Carter St (Inside Days Inn) 423-634-9191

record reviews • ernie paik lifers, the first compilation on the cassette label life like, founded by Fred Thomas (best known as the front man of Saturday Looks Good to Me), comes 51 releases into the label’s catalog, and it’s a doozy, clocking in at 96 minutes with 29 different artists. More than a year in the making, the tape is the result of Thomas’s call out for “the scuzziest no-fi sub-music recordings” among his musical friends across the U.S.A., including Thurston Moore of Sonic Youth, The Hive Dwellers (featuring Calvin Johnson), and many more lesser-known acts with a concentration on Michigan troublemakers and Life Like recording artists. Despite the wording of Thomas’s request, only a few contributions are truly “scuzzy” or “no-fi,” but most have a homemade feel with at least a glimmer of pop/rock experimentation. Side one, for the most part, is conventionally song-oriented, with the gentle electronic ambiance and hip-hop beats of Curtains and Various Artists the bouncy, organ-driven femme-pop “She Is Gone” from Bad IndiLifers ans. Several of Thomas’s outfits are represented, including his solo/ (Life Like) duo project City Center, the summer-evoking Swimsuit with the live instrumental “Ghosts,” and Mighty Clouds, presenting a simple charm with Betty Barnes’s multi-layered vocals over acoustic guitar strums. While side one is a mixed bag, things really start to gel on the somewhat more satisfying and stranger side two. It features a more unified aesthetic, going from Panda Bear-esque loops and even to noise, like the buzzing “Night Balance” from Lidless Eye. The side begins with the New York City duo Corpsekisser, with a glockenspiel, trainsound loop, and a singsongy creepiness, followed by the distorted synth percolations of Racecardriver. The compilation closes with an untitled track by Evenings, with a disquieting sonic storm, unceasing waves and a roaring guitar in the distance, ending a diverse and generous helping of offerings from the American underground cassetteculture zeitgeist. the deceptively named instrumental duo blues control, comprised of keyboardist Lea Cho and guitarist Russ Waterhouse, is not some generic dive-bar bluesrock outfit, and its groan-worthy pun of a name (rhymes with “cruise control”), originally meant as a joke, provides no real hints for its unclassifiable sound. A typical Blues Control track has a certain setup—a bass anchor played on the piano and electric fuzz guitar wanderings atop homemade rhythm loops—and the pace is usually measured and moderate, but the outcome can vary wildly. The twosome’s new album, Valley Tangents, may sound to fans slightly more accessible and refined than previous outings. Cho is a classically trained pianist, demonstrating both rigor and an explorBlues Control atory attitude in her improvisations, and some of her sound choices Valley Tangents are head-scratchers, using somewhat cheesy presets or, most an(Drag City) noyingly, a plainly artificial digital piano instead of an acoustic piano. Waterhouse uses a guitar tone that wouldn’t be out of place in the psychedelic ’60s, with a warm rather than prickly kind of distortion. “Love’s a Rondo” starts off the album with a slyly pleasing yet odd number, perhaps like Santana crossed with a lounge band, featuring Waterhouse and Cho playing amid vaguely Latin beats from avant-garde percussionist Tatsuya Nakatani. “Iron Pigs” brings to mind Giorgio Moroder in the early ’80s and coke-stained mustaches, with its unabashed synth horn outbursts and a detuned drum loop. “Open Air” has a relaxed vibe, reminiscent of Neu!’s “Leb’ Wohl,” displaying Cho defying her classical background by adjusting frequently, using jazz or torch-song balladry flourishes. The album ends with the noodling “Gypsum,” with wind chimes and a kosmische mood, first using some blurry improv before going into unhinged, warped honky-tonk piano scrambles. It’s hard to pin down what they’re going for, but they are constantly self-regulating, flirting yet never getting too serious or silly and avoiding pretension. Read Ernie Paik’s reviews online at To have your album considered for review, send links to The Pulse via email to

Thursday, July 12: 9pm Open Mic with Mark Holder

Friday, July 13: 9pm Jordan Hallquist

Saturday, July 14: 9pm Hap Henninger

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Observations from the ‘Forest Mandala’ By Rich Bailey on a wooded slope in shakerag hollow in sewanee, David George Haskell spent a year observing what he calls a “forest mandala.” Inspired by the Tibetan Buddhist practice of creating a circular sand painting that symbolizes all creation, Haskell chose a small piece of ever changing forest as his mandala. The University of the South biology professor visited frequently during the next 12 months and documented the experience in “The Forest Unseen,” published this spring. “I’m trying to use this one square meter as area of contemplation but also as a way of seeing the whole functioning of our ecology,” he says. Biologist E.O. Wilson has praised the book as “a new genre of nature writing, located between science and poetry, in which the invisible appear, the small grow large, and the immense complexity and beauty of life are more clearly revealed.” Haskell’s blending of science and poetry comes through in passages like this one: “The sun is origin of both the dawn’s light and the birds’ morning songs. The glow on the horizon is light filtered through our atmosphere; the music in the air is the sun’s energy filtered through the plants and animals that powered the singing birds. The enchantment of an April sunrise is a web of flowing energy. The web is anchored at one end by matter turned to energy in the sun and at the other end by energy turned to beauty in our consciousness.” It’s not all beauty of course. One meditation begins with a cringe-inducing sequence in which Haskell watches through a magnifying lens as a pregnant mosquito—they’re the only ones that bite humans—lands on his hand, feeds and flies away. I had to fight the urge to swat his literary mosquito, but Haskell resists and moves smoothly from the mosquito’s life cycle and the West Nile Virus—“Perhaps I should

Biology professor David George Haskell blends science and poetry in study of ecology. not have been so sanguine about my exsanguination,” he deadpans—to how the need to avoid mosquito-borne malaria brought the University of the South (and thus him) to the Cumberland Plateau. He segues from blood flowing through mosquitoes to calcium flowing from snail shells to birds’ eggs and sulfur flowing from fossil coal to acid rain. Back in the soil, sulfur from coal “tips the chemical balance against the snails,” which might mean fewer birds to eat the mosquitoes that transmit West Nile Virus. “This ripple in the cloth floats across the forest,” he writes, “perhaps finding a hem at which to end, perhaps floating on forever, drifting through the mosquitoes, viruses, humans, ever outward.” Small ripples become big waves. In northern Europe, where acid rain has washed out the calcium from the soil, snail populations have crashed and birds are having trouble breeding, says Haskell. There are similar places on the Cumberland Plateau where the soils are so old and acidic that birds have a hard time finding enough calcium to breed. “All forests are embedded in

other landscapes,” he says. “Every time it rains or dust lands in the forest mandala there are pieces of other places, like the mercury that comes out of coal burning power plant, raining down on it continually. That’s changing it in subtle ways. That mercury becomes formed, embodied. That changes

how the world is, how the forest is, even though that patch of forest is not being mined for coal. Just sitting there, it’s affected by what’s happening elsewhere.” Much of the time, though, he’s writing about very small things— a tick perched on the tip of a viburnum branch, the architecture of mosses, how plant cells change in winter so they can freeze without being shredded from inside by ice crystals. “That small scale is a scale at which a lot of ecology happens. We think about big questions like global warming, but all is rooted down in details of how twigs grow, how ants carry the seeds of wildflowers. All those things happen at very small scale. That doesn’t mean that global patterns aren’t important. They are, but ultimately they’re rooted in the little details of millions of small places.” Human economies depend on both local events and national

control, but “In the natural economy there is no federal government. It’s all coming literally from the grass roots. To understand it you have to get down into those roots and really pay attention to details.” “We create wonderful places by giving them our attention,” Haskell writes. His year of essays ends with a musing on the separateness of human and natural worlds. Apparently reassured, Haskell writes, “The causal center of the natural world is a place that humans had no part in making. Life transcends us.” But humanity and nature can’t quite be separate either: “As my eyes adjust to the night, I see my shadow in the moonlight, resting across the circle of leaves.” More information on “The Forest Unseen,” including the author’s photos of the forest mandala, can be found at • JULY 12-18, 2012 • The Pulse • 15

Arts & Entertainment


Thu 07.12 Street Food Thursdays 11 a.m. Motor Court at Warehouse Row, 1110 Market St. Birds of Prey 11 a.m. Rock City, 1400 Patten Road Lookout Mtn., Ga. (706) 820-2531 “Maritime” Opening Reception 4 p.m. Shuptrine Fine Art Group, 2646 Broad St. (423) 266-4453 Free Family Night 5:30 p.m. Creative Discovery Museum, 321 Chestnut St. (423) 756-2738 Local Democratic Candidates Debate 6 p.m. St. Paul AME Church, 2514 Williams St. (423) 266-4125 YPAC Civic Forum 6 p.m. The DoubleTree Hotel, 407 Chestnut St. All American Summer featuring the Kymera Project 6 p.m. Hunter Museum of American Art, 10 Bluff View (423) 266-0944 Open Mic 7 p.m. The Camphouse, 1427 Williams St. (423) 702-8081 Chattanooga Lookouts 7:15 p.m. AT&T Field, 201 Power Alley (423) 267-2208 Trevor Watts & Veryan Weston 7:30 p.m. Barking Legs Theatre, 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5347 Mickey Dean 8 p.m. The Comedy Catch,

16 • The Pulse • JULY 12-18, 2012 •

“maritime” opening reception THU 07.12 • “Gone Fishing” by Brett Weaver, part of the “Maritime” exhibit at Shuptrine’s. 4 p.m. • Shuptrine Fine Art Group • 2646 Braod St. • (423) 266-4453 •

3224 Brainerd Road (423) 629-2233

fri 07.13 Fresh on Fridays 11 a.m. Miller Plaza, 850 Market St. (423) 265-3700 Nightfall Concert Series 7 p.m. Miller Plaza, 850 Market St. (423) 265-0771 Chattanooga Lookouts 7:15 p.m. AT&T Field, 201 Power Alley (423) 267-2208 Mickey Dean 7:30 & 10 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Road (423) 629-2233 “8”—A Staged Reading 7:30 p.m. C.C. Bond Humanities Auditorium at Chattanooga State

4501 Amnicola Hwy. (423) 987-5141 “The Music Man” 8 p.m. Signal Mountain Playhouse, 301 Rolling Way, Signal Mountain “HAIR: The American Tribal Love-Rock Musical” 8 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 “Anything Goes” 8 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 Karen Mills 9:30 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839 Late Night Hoops! 10 p.m. Howard High School, 2500 South Market St. (423) 643-6055

LOCAL DEMOCRATIC CANDIDATES DEBATE THU 07.12 • Third District congressional contender Bill Taylor (above) and other local Democratic candidates debate their positions. 6 p.m. St. Paul AME Church 2514 Williams St. (423) 266-4125

sat 07.14 Siskin’s Call-N-4-Kids Radiothon 10 a.m. (423) 648-1724 River Market 10 a.m. Tennessee Aquarium Plaza, 1 Broad St. (423) 402-9960 Summer Music Weekends Noon. Rock City, 1400 Patten Rd. Lookout Mtn., Ga. (706) 820-2531 Mickey Dean 7:30 & 10 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Road (423) 629-2233 “The Music Man” 8 p.m. Signal Mountain Playhouse, 301 Rolling Way, Signal Mountain “Anything Goes”

8 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 “HAIR: The American Tribal Love-Rock Musical” 8 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 Late Night Hoops! 10 p.m. Howard High School, 2500 S. Market St. (423) 643-6055 Karen Mills 10:30 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839

sun 07.15 Chattanooga Market 11 a.m. First Tennessee Pavilion, 1829 Carter St. (423) 402-9960 Summer Music Weekends Noon. Rock City, 1400 Patten Road Lookout Mtn., Ga. (706) 820-2531 “Anything Goes” 2:30 p.m. Chattanooga Theatre Centre, 400 River St. (423) 267-8534 Mickey Dean 8 p.m. The Comedy Catch, 3224 Brainerd Road (423) 629-2233 Teens in Trouble 2 8:30 p.m. Barking Legs Theatre, 1307 Dodds Ave. (423) 624-5347

mon 07.16 KAREN MILLS FRI 07.13 & SAT 07.14 • Standup comedian performs at the Vaudeville cafe. 9:30 (FRI) & 10:30 p.m. (SAT) Vaudeville Cafe 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839

Summer Film Series: “I’m Carolyn Parker: The Good, The Mad, and the Beautiful” 6:30 p.m. Downtown YMCA, 301 W. 6th St. (423) 894-8927 Music Monday

“i’m carolyn parker: the good, the mad, and the beautiful” MON 07.16 • Jonathan Demme’s portrait of post Katrina New Orleans, part of the Chattanooga Film Society’s Summer Film Series. 6 p.m. • Downtown YMCA • 301 W. 6th St. •

7 p.m. Pasha Coffee & Tea, 3914 St. Elmo Ave. (423) 475-5482

tue 07.17 Noon Nosh Luncheon with Special Guest Carol Berz Noon. Jewish Cultural Center, 5461 N. Terr. Road (423) 493-0270 Live Team Trivia 7:30 p.m. Brewhaus, 224 Frazier Ave. (423) 531-8490 Mouth of the South 8 p.m. Vaudeville Café, 138 Market St. (423) 517-1839

wed 07.18 Main Street Farmer’s Market 4 p.m. 325 E. Main St. Chattanooga Night Market 5 p.m. Ross’s Landing, Chestnut Street & Riverfront Parkway “Godspell” 7:30 p.m. ReCreate Café at The Salvation Army, 800 McCallie Ave.

Map these locations on chattanoogapulse. com. Send calendar listings at least 10 days in advance to: calendar@ • JULY 12-18, 2012 • The Pulse • 17


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Pie for the People “it is utterly insufficient to eat pie only twice a week, as anyone who knows the secret of our strength as a nation and the foundation of our industrial supremacy must admit. Pie is the American synonym of prosperity, and its varying contents the calendar of the changing seasons. Pie is the food of the heroic. No pie-eating people can ever be permanently vanquished.” —New York Times editorial, 1902 You don’t get between an American and his pie. It’s a symbol of wholesomeness, stability and even patriotism that, quite frankly, I believe has gotten a bit too big for its britches. Throughout the history of our country, pie has been slowly shifting from its roots as a savory and hearty fixture of the American dinner table to a carefully latticed or meringued tower of sugar perched on a glass ensconced pedestal to be judged by a bald-headed freak who thinks he’s a “Sweet Genius.” Pie should be released from its gilded cage and allowed to once again run free and unconstrained on menus and dinner tables, be it savory or sweet, rustic or artfully designed. In places like Seattle, New York and Washington D.C., restaurants are popping up with a singular devotion to pie and pie accessories. Last month, Chattanooga joined

the pie renaissance with the opening of Fork and Pie Bar at 811 Market St. If you’re over 40, it’s in the old Ira Trivers shop. If you’re under 40, it’s the old Quiznos location. Either way, it’s not the same old pies. The minimalist décor allows you to actually see the beautiful architectural elements of the historic space F&P occupies. Tables and display shelving left over from Ira Trivers clothiers have been restored and turned into dining tables and bar shelving. You can sit and imagine that you’re eating at a table where Mort Lloyd’s anchorman suits were crafted or Bob Brandy’s ’70s evening jackets were custom fitted for those wild nights at the Town and Country. Eat your heart out Hard Rock Café. Owners Jennifer Rintelman and the BrewHaus’ Mike Robinson have put together a menu that reads like the

greatest hits of pie, with some creative alt-pies thrown in for the culinary indie crowd. On the savory side, the menu comes out of the gate with strong favorites like chicken pot pie and quiche. Down the list you’ll see other offerings like shepherd’s pie, a veggie pot pie for the herbivores, and savory pies with the flavors of Mexico, Italy and Spain. Predictably, I was drawn to the pulled pork barbecue pie with a sweet cornbread crust. This pie nestles smoky pulled pork that’s covered, but not drowned, in a brown sugar barbecue sauce under a crunchy layer of slightly sweet cornbread. Because they care about you and your pie, there’s no bottom crust to this particular pie so there’s no soggy mess lurking underneath the tender porky goodness. Each component of the pie was good, but eaten together it was great. Every forkful was packed with smoky meat, sweet sauce and crunchy cornbread crust—and every scrap made its way out of the pie tin and into my pie hole. Don’t let your stomach trick you into thinking a four-inch personal pie won’t be enough to fill you up, unless you require a meal the size of your head to satisfy your cavernous

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appetite. When a situation arises that screams for maximum pie, you can get a big nine-inch that will satisfy all of your unholy cravings. In the coming weeks, F&P will be getting a liquor license so that they can bring custom drink and pie pairings to Market Street through their relationship with one of their many local food partners, Pure Soda Works. Yeah, I said it—custom drink and pie pairings are coming to Market Street. Suck it Seattle. Of course, they offer sweet pies in the traditional flavors and varieties you would expect, including chocolate chess, fruit and good old pecan. These are pies that Thiebaud would paint and eat—not pies vying for a spot on “Man vs. Food” or to be framed under glass. I truly hope that this is a sign of a pie renaissance that will sweep across the nation and rescue pie from the applepious symbolism that has separated it from our daily lives. Pie to the people! Mike McJunkin cooks better than you and eats quite a lot of very strange food. Visit his Facebook page (Sushi and Biscuits) for updates and recipes.

Tuesday: Karaoke 10pm to 2am Wednesday: $1 Beer No cover 4pm to Close

Thursdays: Live Trivia 8-10pm Happy Hour Daily 4-8pm

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CANCER (June 21-July 22): Let’s hypothesize that there are two different kinds of freedom possible for you to pursue. One is simplistic and sterile, while the other is colorful and fertile. The first is characterized by absence or emptiness, and the second is full of rich information and stimulating experiences. Is there any doubt about which is preferable? I know that the simplistic, sterile freedom might be easier and faster to attain. But its value would be limited and short-lived, I’m afraid. In the long run, the tougher liberation will be more rewarding. LEO






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20 • The Pulse • JULY 12-18, 2012 •

(July 23-Aug. 22): Some people believe that a giant sea serpent lives in a Scottish lake. They call it the Loch Ness Monster, or Nessie for short. The evidence is anecdotal and skimpy. On the other hand, Nessie has long been a boon to tourism in the area. The natives are happy that the tales of its existence are so lively. I’d like to propose using the Loch Ness monster as a template for how to deal with one of your scary delusions. Use your rational mind to exorcise any anxiety you might still be harboring, and figure out a way to take advantage of the legendary story you created about it.

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): “The

soul should always stand ajar,” said 19th-century Emily Dickinson poet in one of her poems, “That if the heaven inquire, He will not be obliged to wait, Or shy of troubling her.” Modern translation: You should keep your deep psyche in a constant state of readiness for the possible influx of divine inspiration or unexpected blessings. This is always a sound principle to live by. But it will be an especially valuable strategy in the coming weeks. Right now, imagine what it feels like when your soul is properly ajar.

LIBRA (Sept. 23-Oct. 22): Some people wonder if I’m more like a cheerleader than an objective reporter. They think that maybe I minimize the pain and exaggerate the gain that lie ahead. I understand why they might pose that question. My optimism is medicine to protect you from the distortions that the conventional wisdom propagates. Having said that, I’d like you to know that I’m not counterbalancing at all when I give you this news: You’re close to grabbing a strategic advantage over a frustration that has hindered you for a long time. SCORPIO

(Oct. 23-Nov. 21): “Life always gives us exactly the

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teacher we need at every moment,” said Zen teacher Charlotte Joko Beck. “This includes every mosquito, every misfortune, every red light, every traffic jam, every obnoxious supervisor (or employee), every illness, every loss, every moment of joy or depression, every addiction, every piece of garbage, every breath.” While I appreciate Beck’s advice, I’m perplexed why she put such a heavy emphasis on lessons that arise from difficult events. In the weeks ahead, you’ll be proof that this is shortsighted. Your teachers are likely to be expansive, benevolent, and generous.


(Nov. 22-Dec. 21): A lathe is a machine that grips a chunk of metal or wood or clay and rotates it so that someone wielding a tool can form the chunk into a desired shape. From a metaphorical point of view, I visualize you as being held by a cosmic lathe right now. God or fate or whatever you’d prefer to call it is chiseling away the nonessential stuff so as to sculpt a more beautiful and useful version of you. Although the process may be somewhat painful, I think you’ll be happy with the result.

CAPRICORN (Dec. 22-Jan. 19): I’m hoping you will take maximum advantage of the big opportunity that’s ahead for you, Capricorn: an enhancement of your senses. That’s right. For the foreseeable future, you not only have the potential to experience extra vivid and memorable perceptions. You could also wangle an upgrade in the acuity and profundity of your senses. For best results, focus less on the thoughts rumbling around inside your mind and simply notice what’s going on around you. AQUARIUS

(Jan. 20-Feb. 18): What kind of week will it be for you? It will be like you’re chewing gum while walking down a city street and then suddenly you sneeze, catapulting the gooey mess from your mouth onto the sidewalk in such a way that it gets stuck to the bottom of your shoe, which causes you to trip and fall, allowing you to find a $100 bill that is just lying there unclaimed and that you would have never seen had you not experienced your little fit of “bad luck.” Be ready to cash in on unforeseen twists of fate, Aquarius.

PISCES (Feb. 19-March 20): Having served as executive vicepresident of the Hedonistic Anarchists Think Tank, I may not seem

like the most believable advocate of the virtues of careful preparation, rigorous organization, and steely resolve. But if I have learned anything from consorting with hedonistic anarchists, it’s that there’s not necessarily a clash between thrill-seeking and self-discipline. The two can even be synergistic. I think that’s especially true for you right now, Pisces. The quality and intensity of your playtime activities will thrive in direct proportion to your self-command.

ARIES (March 21-April 19): During an author tour a few years ago, I was a guest on San Francisco radio station KFOG. For a while, the host interviewed me about my book and astrology column. Then, out of nowhere, the host asked me, “So who was I in my past life?” Although I’m not in the habit of reading people’s previous incarnations, I suddenly and inexplicably had the sense that I knew exactly who he had been: Savonarola, a controversial 15thcentury Italian friar. I suspect you may soon have comparable experiences, Aries. Don’t be surprised if you are able to glean new revelations about the past and come to fresh insights about how history has unfolded. TAURUS (April 20-May 20): Tease and tempt and tantalize, Taurus. Be pithy and catchy and provocative. Don’t go on too long. Drop hints and cherish riddles. Believe in the power of telepathy. Add a new twist or two to your body language. Be sexy in the subtlest ways you can imagine. Pose questions that no one has been brave or smart enough to ask. Hang out in thresholds, crossroads, and any other place where the action is entertaining. GEMINI (May 21-June 20): American political leaders who have never been soldiers tend to be more gung-ho about sending U.S. fighting forces into action than leaders who have actually served in the military. So said former Marine captain Matt Pottinger in I recommend that you avoid and prevent comparable situations in your own life during the coming weeks, Gemini. Don’t put yourself under the influence of decisionmakers who have no direct experience of the issues that are important to you. Be humble about pressing forward if you’re armed with no more than a theoretical understanding of things. As much as possible, make your choices and wield your clout based on what you know firsthand.

Jonesin’ Crossword

matt jones






THE PULSE • STATE OF THE ARTS • AUG. 23 • 2012 “The Big Build-Up”—see the sequences? Across

1. Old theater name 7. Actor Oka of “Heroes” 11. ___ Rida (“Low” performer with T-Pain) 14. Like some art exhibits 15. “By the look ___...” 16. Ticket seating stat 17. Write down “Vast Asian country with a population of over a billion”? 19. ___ Productions (“Skyfall” company) 20. Notable time periods 21. Dinghy mover 22. James Cameron hit 24. Fifth qtrs. 25. Direct deposit abbr. 26. “Ten Summoner’s Tales” singer 27. Crazy situation in “The King’s Speech”? 31. ___ corpus 34. Tiny battery size 35. Arms requirement 36. On guard 37. It ain’t nothing 38. Chris of the “American Pie” series

39. ___-Flush (former bathroom cleaner brand) 40. Poli ___ (college field of study) 41. They produce mushroom clouds 42. Steal a parachute pants-wearing rapper’s plane? 45. Kate’s sitcom partner, in the 1980s 46. Guy’s counterpart 47. “___ du lieber!” 50. Malfunctions, like a printer 52. Endodontist’s degree: abbr. 53. Razor line introduced by Gillette 54. Inventor Whitney 55. Leader of the course “Denial 101”? 58. Actor Cheadle 59. Heidi of “Project Runway” 60. Ultimate 61. Favorite word of nitpicky grammarians 62. Himalayan giant 63. Slender


1. Drive around southern California? 2. Like xenon, as gases go 3. Some Italian cars, for short 4. Piano teacher on “Family Guy” 5. Neutral shade 6. Chant from the cult horror classic “Freaks” 7. “SNL” alum Jay 8. Org. with a “100 Years...” series 9. “Witchcraft” singer 10. Type of type 11. Apps for nothing 12. “On Golden Pond” bird 13. Takes control of 18. “E! News” cohost Sadler 23. Asthmatic’s item 25. Coup d’___ 26. 59-across’s ex 27. TV dramas, generally 28. Sofia Coppola’s aunt ___ Shire 29. Leave out 30. Mitt Romney’s

entourage quintet 31. Chop into fine pieces 32. Half a ball game? 33. Hundreds of rap videos? 37. Pang 38. “Hooked on Classics” record label 40. It’s held going downhill 41. Best Picture winner of the 1980s 43. Really inelegant 44. “Oracular Spectacular” band 47. Playwright Fugard 48. Aim rival 49. “The Outcasts of Poker Flat” writer Bret 50. One who obeys The Force 51. Oodles 52. Moore of “G.I. Jane” 53. Wile E. Coyote’s supplier 56. Accommodate, with “up” 57. Off-roader

Jonesin’ Crossword created By Matt Jones. © 2012 Jonesin’ Crosswords. For answers to this puzzle, call: 1-900-226-2800, 99 cents per minute. Must be 18+ to call. Or to bill to your credit card, call: 1-800-655-6548. Reference puzzle No. 0580. • JULY 12-18, 2012 • The Pulse • 21

Life in the Noog

chuck crowder

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full bar 22 • The Pulse • JULY 12-18, 2012 •

last night i witnessed a travesty of social interaction that i thought would never happen as long as people were actually still trying to get laid. I saw a couple on a dinner date, sitting across from each other, playing on their individual smart phones for what seemed to be the entire meal. Really?! I hope they were texting each other, because whomever was receiving those texts with was the real dinner date. What’s wrong with people these days? Why is it so necessary to know what is going on everywhere other than where you are right now? First and foremost, it’s rude. It clearly indicates that anyone else out there is more important than that person right in front of you. This type of rudeness in our A.D.D. society is becoming increasingly accepted as “multi-tasking.” It’s sad. When I am out with friends, my phone stays in my pocket. If it buzzes, and I know that someone is trying to contact me, most of the time I’ll wait until a break in the conversation or bathroom run to check my phone. But I have friends who will maintain three and four texting conversations with people who aren’t present, while half listening to what’s going on right in front of them. Then when we laugh at something they should’ve heard and didn’t, we have to repeat it so they only have to really pay attention the A-list material coming from the table. I’ve noticed though, when the two sexes are at the same table as a group, whether just friends or more, they will forego their sudden need to find something better going on and pay attention to the analog conversation likely in hopes of becoming one of those dinner

date couples who are free to text away. Men and women share an unquenchable thirst for the capabilities of a smartphone, although both are quite different in its use. Men want a phone that can handle the latest and greatest apps, videos and gaming. Ladies, on the other hand, seem to be more interested in a phone with a keyboard that makes texting as effortless as possible—especially while driving. The biggest difference in the sexes when it comes to smartphones however, is how both keep them ready for wearing out on a daily basis. When I wake up each morning, like all guys I know, my smartphone is on the nightstand freshly charged. In fact, it’s my alarm clock. I unplug it and it remains in my pocket or no more than three feet away from me—at all times. If you call my phone and I don’t answer, your next call should be the paramedics. Every female I have ever encountered, however, has no idea how much juice their phone battery has left at any giv-

en time—provided they know exactly where their phone is located at the moment. Any given night before going to bed, I might brush my teeth if I’ve bothered to at least take off my shoes. But no matter what happens or doesn’t happen, my phone will be plugged into the charger on my nightstand before light’s out. On the other hand, I’ve witnessed girlfriends take painstaking measures to remove contact lenses, wash their face, brush their teeth and find the appropriate concert T-shirt to sleep in without the slightest notion of where their phone is, let alone if it might need charging. Then they wake up in the morning and sigh, “my phone’s dead.” Recently I was recalling the days of land lines and answering machines with a friend who’s a little older than me. Back when we were teenagers, the only way to find out where your friends were was to pick up a pay phone, call their machine and hope they were home or knew how to check their messages remotely. Then I realized this same friend doesn’t even have a cellphone. Geez—he is out of touch. Or is he? Chuck Crowder is a local writer and general man about town. His opinions are just that. • JULY 12-18, 2012 • The Pulse • 23

The Pulse 9.28 » July 12-18, 2012